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The Season: A Social History of the Debutante
The world of debutantes opens into a revealing story of women across six centuries, their limited options, and their desires.
Digging into the roots of the debutante ritual, with its ballrooms and white dresses, Kristen Richardson - herself descended from a line of debutantes - was fascinated to discover that the debutante ritual places our contemporary ideas about women and marriage in a new light. In this brilliant history of the phenomenon, Richardson shares debutantes’ own words—from diaries, letters, and interviews—throughout her vivid telling, beginning in Henry VIII’s era, sweeping through Queen Elizabeth I’s court, crossing back and forth the Atlantic to colonial Philadelphia, African American communities, Jane Austen’s England, and Mrs. Astor’s parties, ultimately arriving at the contemporary New York Infirmary and International balls.
Whether maligned for its archaic attitude and objectification of women or praised for raising money for charities and providing a necessary coming-of-age ritual, the debutante tradition has more to tell us in this entertaining and illuminating book.
Digging into the roots of the debutante ritual, with its ballrooms and white dresses, Kristen Richardson - herself descended from a line of debutantes - was fascinated to discover that the debutante ritual places our contemporary ideas about women and marriage in a new light. In this brilliant history of the phenomenon, Richardson shares debutantes’ own words—from diaries, letters, and interviews—throughout her vivid telling, beginning in Henry VIII’s era, sweeping through Queen Elizabeth I’s court, crossing back and forth the Atlantic to colonial Philadelphia, African American communities, Jane Austen’s England, and Mrs. Astor’s parties, ultimately arriving at the contemporary New York Infirmary and International balls.
Whether maligned for its archaic attitude and objectification of women or praised for raising money for charities and providing a necessary coming-of-age ritual, the debutante tradition has more to tell us in this entertaining and illuminating book.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published November 19, 2019
269 people are currently reading
5858 people want to read
About the author
Kristen Richardson
1 book30 followersKristen Richardson grew up in a family of debutantes. She didn’t come out, but wrote a popular article about it for Rookie. She worked at Harper’s and lives in Brooklyn, New York.
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December 30, 2019An engaging social history that, perhaps wisely, avoids reflecting the ever-evolving history of marriage, which was running in a not-always-parallel track to the presentation of eligible young woman through English history in particular.
It's a fun read, but I caution anyone serious about history to delve further, as I caught a number of errors. Besides naming the wrong king George (a mistake easily made) at the turn of the twentieth century, the farther back in history the more errors that I suspect arise out of the author not having made a study of these earlier periods of European history. Like the statement that conduct books (or courtesy books, manuals of etiquette and manners) appeared in England in the 1700s. Actually, no, they go back for centuries, an important one being various translations of Castiglione's The Courtier in the late 1500s--and the many, many fictional manuals of court and salon etiquette published in France all through the 1600s, which were read eagerly by the English upper classes, who learned French along with their drawing room polish. There were also reams of religious tracts whose purpose was to caution girls to be meek and modest
This goes for fictional reference as well; the single nod to Pride and Prejudice is completely wrong, a fact that five minutes' checking the text would have corrected. (Richardson writes, Mary belabors her time at the piano by playing religious tunes off-key--how did she get that from "Mary, at the end of a long concerto, was glad to purchase praise and gratitude by Scott and Irish airs"--which songs were not religious at all, but played so that her sisters could dance?)
Then there were the occasional textual errors ("He was bored of the endless banquets given in his honor . . ." should have been bored with), but these are all things a more diligent copy editor ought to have caught.
The bulk of the book makes an absorbing read, tracing the evolution of presentation/coming out/debut/debutante through the centuries, with tantalizing quotations from the letters and diaries of young women over the centuries. Richardson does a good job tracing how in New York society in particular, as the increasingly wealthy middle class caught on, presentation of debutantes became a business, keeping a number of side industries afloat, from the Keepers of Lists to flower sellers and orchestras.
Social histories such as these bring the focus to women's lives. Richardson brings the evolving view of debutantes to the twenty-first century, including very brief overviews of the burgeoning debutante business among China's new rich, and among women of color, for so long shut out of white class rituals.
I would really have liked seeing more pictures, especially of the gowns and locations mentioned in the book. But like I said, overall it was quite absorbing, in particular when the author got to more modern times, and could draw on more sources of material in addition to her own experiences.
It's a fun read, but I caution anyone serious about history to delve further, as I caught a number of errors. Besides naming the wrong king George (a mistake easily made) at the turn of the twentieth century, the farther back in history the more errors that I suspect arise out of the author not having made a study of these earlier periods of European history. Like the statement that conduct books (or courtesy books, manuals of etiquette and manners) appeared in England in the 1700s. Actually, no, they go back for centuries, an important one being various translations of Castiglione's The Courtier in the late 1500s--and the many, many fictional manuals of court and salon etiquette published in France all through the 1600s, which were read eagerly by the English upper classes, who learned French along with their drawing room polish. There were also reams of religious tracts whose purpose was to caution girls to be meek and modest
This goes for fictional reference as well; the single nod to Pride and Prejudice is completely wrong, a fact that five minutes' checking the text would have corrected. (Richardson writes, Mary belabors her time at the piano by playing religious tunes off-key--how did she get that from "Mary, at the end of a long concerto, was glad to purchase praise and gratitude by Scott and Irish airs"--which songs were not religious at all, but played so that her sisters could dance?)
Then there were the occasional textual errors ("He was bored of the endless banquets given in his honor . . ." should have been bored with), but these are all things a more diligent copy editor ought to have caught.
The bulk of the book makes an absorbing read, tracing the evolution of presentation/coming out/debut/debutante through the centuries, with tantalizing quotations from the letters and diaries of young women over the centuries. Richardson does a good job tracing how in New York society in particular, as the increasingly wealthy middle class caught on, presentation of debutantes became a business, keeping a number of side industries afloat, from the Keepers of Lists to flower sellers and orchestras.
Social histories such as these bring the focus to women's lives. Richardson brings the evolving view of debutantes to the twenty-first century, including very brief overviews of the burgeoning debutante business among China's new rich, and among women of color, for so long shut out of white class rituals.
I would really have liked seeing more pictures, especially of the gowns and locations mentioned in the book. But like I said, overall it was quite absorbing, in particular when the author got to more modern times, and could draw on more sources of material in addition to her own experiences.
April 21, 2020
Wow, this was terrible.
Other reviews have mentioned how this is rife with errors, so I’ll just add one more: that the author doesn’t know the difference between shillings and pence. Add to that a lack of focus and a tone that manages to be both snooty and sneering as the author tries to be both in and out. Finally, I’d like to know her credentials, both educational and professional; it seems she has none worth mentioning. Her coyness and evasiveness about the schools she attended and where she’s been published in a book that’s ultimately about snobbery is telling.
Other reviews have mentioned how this is rife with errors, so I’ll just add one more: that the author doesn’t know the difference between shillings and pence. Add to that a lack of focus and a tone that manages to be both snooty and sneering as the author tries to be both in and out. Finally, I’d like to know her credentials, both educational and professional; it seems she has none worth mentioning. Her coyness and evasiveness about the schools she attended and where she’s been published in a book that’s ultimately about snobbery is telling.
July 25, 2019
I was pleasantly surprised at how much more than describing the rites of debutantes this book speaks to. Within the framework of describing the debutante phenomenon, the author meshes it with changing social norms and growing internationalism.
A few debs are highlighted to give the reader an understanding of both Deb and post Deb years. I found this book very engaging and I would recommend it to women’s studies courses. It’s a delightful way to read social history while becoming cognizant of globalization and it’s effects on traditions, here in America, as well as England, China and France.
Thank you Netgalley, for an informative and enjoyable read.
A few debs are highlighted to give the reader an understanding of both Deb and post Deb years. I found this book very engaging and I would recommend it to women’s studies courses. It’s a delightful way to read social history while becoming cognizant of globalization and it’s effects on traditions, here in America, as well as England, China and France.
Thank you Netgalley, for an informative and enjoyable read.
November 29, 2019
This was a fascinating history of Debutante traditions that is actually a social history of class, gender, and race. The tradition started in Great Britain after the nunneries closed up and people had to figure out what to do with their unmarriagable daughters. Fathers got the legislature to grant them veto power over their daughters' marriages so that they would not lower the family's class. In America, the Debutante ball was a class marker and it varied between north and south, black and white, new money and old.
January 6, 2020
I read a book review that enticed me to read this book, but I probably should have known the subject matter would not interest me very much. In my opinion this should have been a magazine article, not a book. It did not have enough interesting information for a book-length piece. And basically, I don't care that much about the debutante scene.
February 7, 2022
I was never able to find the thesis/focus of this history. The narrative skips around geographically and never seems to tie anything together. The modern debutantes are glossed over with a shrug from the author saying she couldn't get anyone to talk.
If you've read Regency romances, you probably have just as much knowledge of debutantes as this history conveys. Color me disappointed.
If you've read Regency romances, you probably have just as much knowledge of debutantes as this history conveys. Color me disappointed.
January 31, 2020
Don't let those evening gloves on that pink mauve cover fool you — this is a terse, tense history of deep social revision.
Kristen Richardson educates the reader through six centuries of debutante culture that arose from attempts to preserve, promote and propagate bastions of power and culture. From the English court of Elizabeth I through to our colonial days, blending research and vignettes, she traces the practice to New York, antebellum South and into the Gilded Age. Later chapters brings one to "The Texas Dip" curtsy, plus the growing practice of coming out balls in Russia and China.
I thought debutante cotillions were so divergent from present day culture as to be inconceivable. To this, Richardson proves through nearly 300 pages that the "coming out" custom is dead but will never die.
A solid three star. An illuminating peek into a rarely broached slice of society.
Kristen Richardson educates the reader through six centuries of debutante culture that arose from attempts to preserve, promote and propagate bastions of power and culture. From the English court of Elizabeth I through to our colonial days, blending research and vignettes, she traces the practice to New York, antebellum South and into the Gilded Age. Later chapters brings one to "The Texas Dip" curtsy, plus the growing practice of coming out balls in Russia and China.
I thought debutante cotillions were so divergent from present day culture as to be inconceivable. To this, Richardson proves through nearly 300 pages that the "coming out" custom is dead but will never die.
A solid three star. An illuminating peek into a rarely broached slice of society.
September 16, 2019
**Disclaimer** I won this ARC from a Goodreads giveaway. This doesn't chance my review, but I thought I should mention it. I wasn't required to write this review, it just seemed polite to do so after getting a free book.
An interesting and relatively quick read about a bit of history I hadn't though much about before
My only complaints are really the lack of pictures and minimal period quotes/description. After all the mention of journals and letters in the introduction I found myself wanting to hear more from the young women the book is chronicling. Also, how can a book with so many descriptions of gowns and balls not have even one picture of a dressed up debutante?
An interesting and relatively quick read about a bit of history I hadn't though much about before
My only complaints are really the lack of pictures and minimal period quotes/description. After all the mention of journals and letters in the introduction I found myself wanting to hear more from the young women the book is chronicling. Also, how can a book with so many descriptions of gowns and balls not have even one picture of a dressed up debutante?
August 19, 2020
An evenhanded and unsentimental look at the history (and a little of the present) of debutantes. I think the Goodreads reviews of this have been artificially deflated by defensive debutantes and people involved in debuting. The book isn’t even really “anti-debutante” as much as it is honest about the paternalism and classism that is such a big part of these rituals.
June 20, 2022
This book covers a wide span of history and is information-packed. It is not the reader-friendly book I was expecting, and it comes across more like a textbook than something to curl up on the couch with. The content was interesting and at times surprising (I had no idea George Washington was such a ladies’ man!) but a lot of it was boilerplate—of course debuts were rife with criticism and competitiveness, and of course judgment was pervasive and harsh. This book does dive a bit deeper and explores elitism/classism throughout different cultures and races over time. It really is fascinating to learn the history of social/marriage standards and how families of old were basically pawning their daughters with the hope of bringing glory and fortune to the family. It also delves into the modern deb season where the prize is no longer a husband, but press and social relevance. Everyone’s in it to build up their personal brand. While I did glaze over here and there, it was overall a good read.
August 17, 2020
I had to dock a star from my rating because there's a historical error in one of the chapters. Richardson mentions that King George V was a stammerer and was brother to Edward VIII, who abdicated. But it was George IV who was the stammerer with the abdicating brother. She had the right king for the era that the chapter was covering (which was around the time of the First World War), but attributed the wrong history to him.
Despite that, this is a very well-researched book. The first chapter was a bit arduous to get through, because it includes a lot of history of royal presentations and marriage practices that lead up to the creation of the debutante ritual, but once I got through that chapter the rest was a breeze. I especially liked that the author made sure to include black debutantes, and pointed out the racist history of balls thrown by secretive clubs. And although Richardson didn't come out herself, her book is very balanced and highlights the benefits and drawbacks of the modern debutante ritual.
Despite that, this is a very well-researched book. The first chapter was a bit arduous to get through, because it includes a lot of history of royal presentations and marriage practices that lead up to the creation of the debutante ritual, but once I got through that chapter the rest was a breeze. I especially liked that the author made sure to include black debutantes, and pointed out the racist history of balls thrown by secretive clubs. And although Richardson didn't come out herself, her book is very balanced and highlights the benefits and drawbacks of the modern debutante ritual.
November 12, 2020
Not a rigorous history, but an interesting one. Probably deserves 3.5 stars. Like a proper American she mixed up some English kings.
February 16, 2020
A thorough and fascinating account of the debutante as a both a catalyst for and product of social history.
I came to this book with a voyeuristic and admittedly slightly sneering perspective on debutante culture. What I actually got was an enthralling and poignant socio-contextual history of the role and value of women in western society.
Richardson does an outstanding job of taking a topic that feels niche (especially in this day and age) and applying its evolution to the study of the changing role of women. The correlations between different periods of American and European history with the debutante rituals at the time tells us a great deal about the culture in a broader context. We even get a look into globalization as reflected through the debutante world at the end of the book, where Richardson touches on nonwestern debuts.
Fair warning: The book is incredibly dense and dry in parts, which is not in this case a bad thing, but did cause me to read it a chapter at a time spread out over several weeks in order to better enjoy it.
*I received an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.*
I came to this book with a voyeuristic and admittedly slightly sneering perspective on debutante culture. What I actually got was an enthralling and poignant socio-contextual history of the role and value of women in western society.
Richardson does an outstanding job of taking a topic that feels niche (especially in this day and age) and applying its evolution to the study of the changing role of women. The correlations between different periods of American and European history with the debutante rituals at the time tells us a great deal about the culture in a broader context. We even get a look into globalization as reflected through the debutante world at the end of the book, where Richardson touches on nonwestern debuts.
Fair warning: The book is incredibly dense and dry in parts, which is not in this case a bad thing, but did cause me to read it a chapter at a time spread out over several weeks in order to better enjoy it.
*I received an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.*
October 4, 2021
"The debutantes we think of today, bowing deeply in frosty dresses, originated and evolved in England and America quite simply because they were needed to solve a problem. The Protestant Reformation in sixteenth-century England and northern Europe ended the extremely convenient practice of cloistering unmarriageable girls in convents. While Catholic aristocracy in Europe continued this practice, the English aristocracy now had a daughter problem. Protestants, you see, don’t have convents."
This was great. A very readable, seemingly well-research book on the social history of the debutante and the way it has been transformed, remade, and refuses to die. I've told the above quote to a ton of people since reading the book and I find it absolutely fascinating. I mean, it makes total sense once you think about it, but who does? The chapters are roughly arranged by era, and the move pretty briskly. This felt like the perfect warm-up to read before another season of Bridgerton if you're so inclined.
This was great. A very readable, seemingly well-research book on the social history of the debutante and the way it has been transformed, remade, and refuses to die. I've told the above quote to a ton of people since reading the book and I find it absolutely fascinating. I mean, it makes total sense once you think about it, but who does? The chapters are roughly arranged by era, and the move pretty briskly. This felt like the perfect warm-up to read before another season of Bridgerton if you're so inclined.
February 1, 2020
Listened to the audiobook. While relatively interesting and engaging, filling me with facts I had no prior knowledge of, I also did find myself zoning out at points. I’ve never been one for name-dropping, so some of the anecdotes that we’re centered around “prominent” figures or whatever just didn’t stick with me.
The most interesting part for me is how this seemingly archaic tradition continues on in modern times, and is actually now being adopted by other countries like Russia and China, and how the ritual is functioning in those places.
Interesting read, but like many other reviewers here I also feel that subject matter like this is better supported by visuals. Honestly think this subject/book would make for a great documentary — would 100% watch it (night even be a case where the movie would be better than the book tbh).
The most interesting part for me is how this seemingly archaic tradition continues on in modern times, and is actually now being adopted by other countries like Russia and China, and how the ritual is functioning in those places.
Interesting read, but like many other reviewers here I also feel that subject matter like this is better supported by visuals. Honestly think this subject/book would make for a great documentary — would 100% watch it (night even be a case where the movie would be better than the book tbh).
March 12, 2024
This book is...okay.
As a rule of thumb, I take non-fiction titles where the author provides next to no credentials or proof of their authority on the subject with a grain of salt. I had to SCOUR the internet to find any sort of information about the author's credentials, and the information I found only confirmed that she went to college, not what degree she has or what subject she studied. Red flag.
Instead of giving the reader her credentials, the author attempts to create rapport by explaining to the reader that she comes from a long line of debutantes. But, in very pick-me fashion, she explains that she chose NOT to participate for whatever reason (she gives a reason, but I was rolling my eyes too aggressively to hear her). She then proceeds to tell us how terrible the debutante rituals are (yes, rich white girl. Please, tell me how hard life is. Ugh.).
And last but not least, I am no author. However, if I were writing a non-fiction book, I probably wouldn't start it by telling everyone how I plagiarized another author's work when I was at boarding school just because I didn't want to do any real work. Partially because I have never been to boarding school, but mostly because admitting to plagiarism at the beginning of your book sets your reader up to think "hmm...is this actually your work? Or did you take someone else's work, again?". HUGE red flag.
The ONLY thing that gives this book any sort of authority is the fact that Smithsonian named it a "Best History Book of 2019". However, given the author's repeated mention of her family's social status, I can't help but wonder if she was really awarded the title or if she just bought the title.
This book is okay if you know NOTHING about debutante rituals and the social season. The basic information is fine. But if you have a basic understanding of how the social season works, this book will tell you nothing that you didn't already know.
As a rule of thumb, I take non-fiction titles where the author provides next to no credentials or proof of their authority on the subject with a grain of salt. I had to SCOUR the internet to find any sort of information about the author's credentials, and the information I found only confirmed that she went to college, not what degree she has or what subject she studied. Red flag.
Instead of giving the reader her credentials, the author attempts to create rapport by explaining to the reader that she comes from a long line of debutantes. But, in very pick-me fashion, she explains that she chose NOT to participate for whatever reason (she gives a reason, but I was rolling my eyes too aggressively to hear her). She then proceeds to tell us how terrible the debutante rituals are (yes, rich white girl. Please, tell me how hard life is. Ugh.).
And last but not least, I am no author. However, if I were writing a non-fiction book, I probably wouldn't start it by telling everyone how I plagiarized another author's work when I was at boarding school just because I didn't want to do any real work. Partially because I have never been to boarding school, but mostly because admitting to plagiarism at the beginning of your book sets your reader up to think "hmm...is this actually your work? Or did you take someone else's work, again?". HUGE red flag.
The ONLY thing that gives this book any sort of authority is the fact that Smithsonian named it a "Best History Book of 2019". However, given the author's repeated mention of her family's social status, I can't help but wonder if she was really awarded the title or if she just bought the title.
This book is okay if you know NOTHING about debutante rituals and the social season. The basic information is fine. But if you have a basic understanding of how the social season works, this book will tell you nothing that you didn't already know.
May 30, 2022
I enjoyed this book more than I expected! Richardson goes back hundreds of years (and even a little bit on the Romans and Greeks) to explain how the tradition of the debut emerged and changed over time. She appropriately weaves in socio-economic history and race, while covering fashion trends, food history, religion, and some broader context as it relates to gender dynamics of each time period.
August 16, 2020
I think sociology is one of the most under-rated fields of study in the soft-sciences. Honestly, I think it should be a required element of every single other course of study a student could follow because it gives a certain backbone of context to things that makes retaining the information easier, and gives the information itself more innate value.
The Season is a shining example of why that kind of context is significant.
This history lesson is sweepingly informative, covering six centuries and three continents, and capturing the perspectives of parents and daughters, from across class lines and racial ones. I deeply enjoyed it and I highly recommend everyone take a stab at reading it.
Non-fiction isn't everyone's cup of tea, but for the most part this is an accessible, absorbing read. Beyond the basic neatness of engagement, I encourage people to read it to gain an understanding of the serious social-construction considerations that have gone into engineering of societal strata.
Now, that said, it's not perfectly accurate. While certainly well-researched, there were some odd flubs and factual mistakes that threw me off a little. None of them were crucial and they served as only minor distractions, but if you enjoy reading this I definitely suggest you delve further into learning a bit more of the hard-and-fast details (some names, mostly the various King Georges get confused, and the dates get a little muddled, like saying 17th Century for the 1700's instead of 18th Century). The literary references are also a bit off or used in an incorrect assessment of their context, but again, nothing too problematic.
Honestly, a more judicious editor should've corrected most of it. Which ties into how there's also a few basic grammatical errors that just shouldn't be there.
I would've liked to see more pictures, since Richardson states repeatedly that half the point of the debutante ritual after the turn of the century was for the press attached to such a social spectacle. Even if we didn't get pictures of the girls themselves or anything, I would've liked to see scans of these scrapbooks and diary entries we hear so much about.
The tone is a bit inconsistent and the structure of the piece is a little weak, but honestly by sociological standards it's very readable (which I think says far more about the tragic state of my favorite field of study than about any of the works within it). Richardson is at a tremendous disadvantage because she strives to be both in-group and out-group at once and both perspectives bleed over strongly simply because she grew up in a world where this culture is part of her personal history. She is made very uncomfortable by observing things she has logically determined to be underpinned with problematic power structures (particularly in the chapter where she touches on racial issues), but she cannot quite separate herself enough to be objective when describing her own friends' histories.
All in all though, I still recommend it.
This book puts our modern world into a very significant lens of focus, a new context on things we assume to be naturalized to the modern world. The societal import of the teenage girl cannot be overstated. They have been, historically, the single most important aspect of societal engineering ever; the entirety of the financial system of the entire world may have been wrangled by men, but it has always and will always revolve around teenage girls.
Personally, I most enjoyed learning about the evolutionary process of the modern wedding industry, and how it would not exist at all without the debutante ritual creating social buzz around the attire, the flowers, the decor, and the pageantry of the marriage market in whole.
I really do believe that this is an important read for anyone with an aim to be a fully informed participant in the modern economy.
The Season is a shining example of why that kind of context is significant.
This history lesson is sweepingly informative, covering six centuries and three continents, and capturing the perspectives of parents and daughters, from across class lines and racial ones. I deeply enjoyed it and I highly recommend everyone take a stab at reading it.
Non-fiction isn't everyone's cup of tea, but for the most part this is an accessible, absorbing read. Beyond the basic neatness of engagement, I encourage people to read it to gain an understanding of the serious social-construction considerations that have gone into engineering of societal strata.
Now, that said, it's not perfectly accurate. While certainly well-researched, there were some odd flubs and factual mistakes that threw me off a little. None of them were crucial and they served as only minor distractions, but if you enjoy reading this I definitely suggest you delve further into learning a bit more of the hard-and-fast details (some names, mostly the various King Georges get confused, and the dates get a little muddled, like saying 17th Century for the 1700's instead of 18th Century). The literary references are also a bit off or used in an incorrect assessment of their context, but again, nothing too problematic.
Honestly, a more judicious editor should've corrected most of it. Which ties into how there's also a few basic grammatical errors that just shouldn't be there.
I would've liked to see more pictures, since Richardson states repeatedly that half the point of the debutante ritual after the turn of the century was for the press attached to such a social spectacle. Even if we didn't get pictures of the girls themselves or anything, I would've liked to see scans of these scrapbooks and diary entries we hear so much about.
The tone is a bit inconsistent and the structure of the piece is a little weak, but honestly by sociological standards it's very readable (which I think says far more about the tragic state of my favorite field of study than about any of the works within it). Richardson is at a tremendous disadvantage because she strives to be both in-group and out-group at once and both perspectives bleed over strongly simply because she grew up in a world where this culture is part of her personal history. She is made very uncomfortable by observing things she has logically determined to be underpinned with problematic power structures (particularly in the chapter where she touches on racial issues), but she cannot quite separate herself enough to be objective when describing her own friends' histories.
All in all though, I still recommend it.
This book puts our modern world into a very significant lens of focus, a new context on things we assume to be naturalized to the modern world. The societal import of the teenage girl cannot be overstated. They have been, historically, the single most important aspect of societal engineering ever; the entirety of the financial system of the entire world may have been wrangled by men, but it has always and will always revolve around teenage girls.
Personally, I most enjoyed learning about the evolutionary process of the modern wedding industry, and how it would not exist at all without the debutante ritual creating social buzz around the attire, the flowers, the decor, and the pageantry of the marriage market in whole.
I really do believe that this is an important read for anyone with an aim to be a fully informed participant in the modern economy.
December 28, 2019
The author doesn't really make a secret of the fact that she went into this biased against Debutantes/Debuting, and so it's not surprising that the book basically has every ounce of information available to back up her presumptions. Literally at the end, she reiterates that the Debutante practices in the African-American community perform some good (scholarships, etc.) and then immediately dunks on them again by bringing up classism.
In particular, it bothered me to see the chapters on Old New York and the Gilded Age. I've read books on this topic before (The Husband Hunters: American Heiresses Who Married into the British Aristocracy) and it was telling that the author essentially glossed over the fact that women (not the daughters, but the mothers) were basically the driving force behind the social scene in New York, particularly the subject of debutantes and marriages. Men took a very backseat role to this, and generally just handed on money for gowns and other things to help the mothers promote their daughters.
In a book more objective and interested in challenging the author's preconceived notions, I could dismiss this as accidentally overlooked; but in a book determined to convince us of the inherently misogynistic nature of the debutantes/debut season, I am inclined to take this as the author perhaps choosing to overlook it because this particular fact does not lend itself well to the beliefs she's set out to prove (i.e. "Debuting is a misogynistic practice where girls are forced to conform to patriarchal standards of womanhood".)
This is a problem with a lot of feminist-aligned history books/analyses: They have a Point they want to make, and they have a tendency to skirt around inconvenient facts that don't line up with the narrative they're working with. The author's tone in this book is "women throughout history had no/barely any power like EVER and Debuting is a practice that encourages that").
Advice: Don't advertise your overt biases about a topic unless you KNOW you're going to be rigorously challenging/disproving them in the book. Because if I know you're biased against Debutantes/Debuting, I'm going to be paying really close attention to whether or not you challenge your own biases over the course of the book.
And if you don't, I'm going to start wondering what facts might have been taken out of context, cherry-picked, or glossed over to fit your biases.
...Other than that, the book was like watching paint dry. Boring as hell.
In particular, it bothered me to see the chapters on Old New York and the Gilded Age. I've read books on this topic before (The Husband Hunters: American Heiresses Who Married into the British Aristocracy) and it was telling that the author essentially glossed over the fact that women (not the daughters, but the mothers) were basically the driving force behind the social scene in New York, particularly the subject of debutantes and marriages. Men took a very backseat role to this, and generally just handed on money for gowns and other things to help the mothers promote their daughters.
In a book more objective and interested in challenging the author's preconceived notions, I could dismiss this as accidentally overlooked; but in a book determined to convince us of the inherently misogynistic nature of the debutantes/debut season, I am inclined to take this as the author perhaps choosing to overlook it because this particular fact does not lend itself well to the beliefs she's set out to prove (i.e. "Debuting is a misogynistic practice where girls are forced to conform to patriarchal standards of womanhood".)
This is a problem with a lot of feminist-aligned history books/analyses: They have a Point they want to make, and they have a tendency to skirt around inconvenient facts that don't line up with the narrative they're working with. The author's tone in this book is "women throughout history had no/barely any power like EVER and Debuting is a practice that encourages that").
Advice: Don't advertise your overt biases about a topic unless you KNOW you're going to be rigorously challenging/disproving them in the book. Because if I know you're biased against Debutantes/Debuting, I'm going to be paying really close attention to whether or not you challenge your own biases over the course of the book.
And if you don't, I'm going to start wondering what facts might have been taken out of context, cherry-picked, or glossed over to fit your biases.
...Other than that, the book was like watching paint dry. Boring as hell.
January 29, 2022
Every lay Anglo-American history buff will enjoy a lot of the stories of this book, though the author, who divorced her husband while writing the book, left her children to two female nannies, and relied on her father to take care of him when she got sick, clearly misses much of the material she works with (as she did with her own life, unfortunately).
Miss Richardson cannot see any purpose in ritual beyond personal fulfillment for the girl, beyond enrichment and entrenchment of patriarchal power for whites who engaged in the process, and yet only positive things to say about blacks who coöpted the ritual coming out for their own entrenchment and building up.
There's lots of good material in here, but Richardson ended up standing between the reader and the material quite frequently, and one could only think "move out of the way!" when she misremembered her English kings and Austen, or when she attributes malice to all white (aka affluent, culture-bearing) adults who perpetuate the ritual.
For those post-liberals looking for institutions to weather the storm in our liquid modernity, this may be as good as you're going to get however, so you might as well plunder the Egyptians. Masculinity and femininity are both being intentionally erased, and finding and understanding how to recover them may involve studying what our forebears did, though not with exact replication (as Richardson notes, the ritual is already uniquely traditionalist), and if anything needs to be integrated more seriously into any post-liberal society. Read this and take notes of how upper class society functions, and as a result, all of society is maintained from generation to generation. After you're done, sit down with some sweet tea and enjoy T.S. Eliot's "Christianity and Culture."
Miss Richardson cannot see any purpose in ritual beyond personal fulfillment for the girl, beyond enrichment and entrenchment of patriarchal power for whites who engaged in the process, and yet only positive things to say about blacks who coöpted the ritual coming out for their own entrenchment and building up.
There's lots of good material in here, but Richardson ended up standing between the reader and the material quite frequently, and one could only think "move out of the way!" when she misremembered her English kings and Austen, or when she attributes malice to all white (aka affluent, culture-bearing) adults who perpetuate the ritual.
For those post-liberals looking for institutions to weather the storm in our liquid modernity, this may be as good as you're going to get however, so you might as well plunder the Egyptians. Masculinity and femininity are both being intentionally erased, and finding and understanding how to recover them may involve studying what our forebears did, though not with exact replication (as Richardson notes, the ritual is already uniquely traditionalist), and if anything needs to be integrated more seriously into any post-liberal society. Read this and take notes of how upper class society functions, and as a result, all of society is maintained from generation to generation. After you're done, sit down with some sweet tea and enjoy T.S. Eliot's "Christianity and Culture."
May 11, 2020
When we hear the word “Debutante” often we think of girls like Kathleen and Rosemary Kennedy being presented “at the Court of St. James”–i.e. to the British monarch. This event signaled their arrival at the upper-class “Tinder” of the day–the marriage market for the upper-classes. While we will hear about some British debs and their rituals and personalities, here at home, the United States also has a fairly rich debutante history of our own. Author Kristen Richardson explores the history, quirks, rules, and events in each of America’s celebrated debutante “markets,” as well as that at Buckingham Palace.
Obviously, New York tops the list–it is here that First Daughter Alice Roosevelt and her first cousin future First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt made their debuts. The Old South is another great deb area, as is Newport, Rhode Island where another future First Lady, Jacqueline Bouvier made her debut.
The marriage market aspect of the story included discussion of the “Dollar Duchesses.” like the fictional Cora Levison who marries Robert, Viscount Crawley and saves Downton Abbey. Her real-life sisters, their often scheming, social-climbing mothers are in here, don’t worry. The story of their Bright Young Thing daughters is given a nice outing, too.
African American debutantes get a nice write-up here too with their sororities such as the mighty and powerful A.K.A.–letters after a name that are nearly as formidable in the United States–especially for businesswomen, as K.G. is in the United Kingdom
My Thoughts
This was a slower-reading book than I anticipated. It is well-researched and is an excellent addition to my personal social history collection.
Obviously, New York tops the list–it is here that First Daughter Alice Roosevelt and her first cousin future First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt made their debuts. The Old South is another great deb area, as is Newport, Rhode Island where another future First Lady, Jacqueline Bouvier made her debut.
The marriage market aspect of the story included discussion of the “Dollar Duchesses.” like the fictional Cora Levison who marries Robert, Viscount Crawley and saves Downton Abbey. Her real-life sisters, their often scheming, social-climbing mothers are in here, don’t worry. The story of their Bright Young Thing daughters is given a nice outing, too.
African American debutantes get a nice write-up here too with their sororities such as the mighty and powerful A.K.A.–letters after a name that are nearly as formidable in the United States–especially for businesswomen, as K.G. is in the United Kingdom
My Thoughts
This was a slower-reading book than I anticipated. It is well-researched and is an excellent addition to my personal social history collection.
June 4, 2020
It has been previously established that I don't like reading nonfiction for entertainment, but apparently the age of the pandemic broke me. I read quite a bit of enjoyable nonfiction in this time, and I'll have you know that I'm working to undo this new propensity of mine.
Anyway, The Season is a text clearly written for folks who either (1) love reading Regency novels or (2) were English majors forced to read Regency novels for many years. I fall in the latter category. I have read Jane Austen and the Brontes and Maria Edgeworth and too many 18th century virtue novels to count. I do not like them, but I am fascinated by the function of gender in those texts. That's why I really liked The Season. As we talked about in my book club (shout out to T.H.!), the text was written for someone who knows these novels and who likely grew up watching Rory navigate similar modern debutante situations in the Gilmore Girls. That's a limitation, but otherwise, the book is well-researched, well-paced, and fascinating.
I kind of wish that Richardson would've arranged the book thematically rather than chronologically so I could see how the threads are pulled through from Jane Austen's time to modern day St. Louis (really shocking vignette about our Missouri city on the River, too!). As it sits, it reads like an interesting encyclopedia with lots of great book references, but I did quite like it.
Anyway, The Season is a text clearly written for folks who either (1) love reading Regency novels or (2) were English majors forced to read Regency novels for many years. I fall in the latter category. I have read Jane Austen and the Brontes and Maria Edgeworth and too many 18th century virtue novels to count. I do not like them, but I am fascinated by the function of gender in those texts. That's why I really liked The Season. As we talked about in my book club (shout out to T.H.!), the text was written for someone who knows these novels and who likely grew up watching Rory navigate similar modern debutante situations in the Gilmore Girls. That's a limitation, but otherwise, the book is well-researched, well-paced, and fascinating.
I kind of wish that Richardson would've arranged the book thematically rather than chronologically so I could see how the threads are pulled through from Jane Austen's time to modern day St. Louis (really shocking vignette about our Missouri city on the River, too!). As it sits, it reads like an interesting encyclopedia with lots of great book references, but I did quite like it.
January 7, 2021
The author's coyness regarding her status and background have been commented on before and I agree that she tries very hard to play both sides of the game. Trying to look like a serious writer while reminding the reader that she belongs to the debutante's world.
I would like to add that calling yourself a writer because you have read lots of books is both arrogant and laughable. If everyone who reads a lot wrote a book, we would have to deforest most of the world to print all of them.
As for the book itself, I think trying to claim its a social history is overly ambitious for what is contained on the pages within. To me, it read like a long grade 10 social studies paper. Mainly gossip and the stringing together of other peoples' observations. There was little insight from the author herself. Though she did make some attempts to make it appear that American debutantes were better educated and more independent that British ones. Somehow I doubt the daughters of Southern slave owning plantation masters had much education in the humanities and equality.
Overall the book wasn't bad, I think I was put off more by the attitude that seemed to be behind it. I felt the author would have no problem sacrificing truth or insight to score points about her own perceived social position.
I would like to add that calling yourself a writer because you have read lots of books is both arrogant and laughable. If everyone who reads a lot wrote a book, we would have to deforest most of the world to print all of them.
As for the book itself, I think trying to claim its a social history is overly ambitious for what is contained on the pages within. To me, it read like a long grade 10 social studies paper. Mainly gossip and the stringing together of other peoples' observations. There was little insight from the author herself. Though she did make some attempts to make it appear that American debutantes were better educated and more independent that British ones. Somehow I doubt the daughters of Southern slave owning plantation masters had much education in the humanities and equality.
Overall the book wasn't bad, I think I was put off more by the attitude that seemed to be behind it. I felt the author would have no problem sacrificing truth or insight to score points about her own perceived social position.
September 8, 2020
A really interesting social history - admittedly, I was a tad bored in the beginning half, but I kept reading because I knew the more contemporary analysis would be interesting, and it was. The last few chapters really showed how debutantes stand in the world today, including the author’s first hand experiences, how the ritual sticks around to reaffirm wealth and status in WASP societies, and how it has been used to gain respect in black American societies. Debutante balls can be extremely classist, racist, and sexist, which makes sense since they stem from the need for rich white men to get rid of their daughters by marrying them to rich husbands, but they also show a unique point where society actually cares about teenage girls. I think the author did a great job at exploring the debutante ritual and it’s ties to marriage, women’s liberation, and celebrity from the context of Britain & America (as I understand it few other cultures traditionally had debutantes, but you’ll have to read the book to see which countries have more recently adopted it...). This is a feminist history, despite focusing on an elitist tradition. Lots of really interesting bits of history that you would never find in a typical history book!
January 18, 2020
The irony is that in her book, that sneers at the rituals for young women to gain social connections in elite circles to enter that society with some renown and hopefully establish some wealth, she attends a debutante ball to gain some connections to this elite circle so she could better write her book and enter literary/academic society with some renown and make a bit of money.
The author seems a bit miffed when at this party after she tells them she is a writer they all go a bit silent towards her as past writers who attended wrote sneering things about it.
Though I do admit they only reason you would want and I wanted to read this book was to sneer at the weird things the elite do. The author did find many interesting things worth sneering.
I would say overall the book is uneven. There are lines that should be paragraphs so paragraphs that should have been chapters and some chapters that would have been better omitted.
The author tries to blend an academic and experiential narrative, it doesn't work well. I go so far to say that if they were developed separately each individual piece would be better than the whole of this book.
The author seems a bit miffed when at this party after she tells them she is a writer they all go a bit silent towards her as past writers who attended wrote sneering things about it.
Though I do admit they only reason you would want and I wanted to read this book was to sneer at the weird things the elite do. The author did find many interesting things worth sneering.
I would say overall the book is uneven. There are lines that should be paragraphs so paragraphs that should have been chapters and some chapters that would have been better omitted.
The author tries to blend an academic and experiential narrative, it doesn't work well. I go so far to say that if they were developed separately each individual piece would be better than the whole of this book.
December 4, 2019
This was absolutely fascinating start to finish. The author has a well-supported, nuanced thesis that demonstrates the importance of diversity and family and cultural change while engaging with economics, literature, and politics over time. Richardson compared my guy Ward McAllister to Martha Stewart (!!), taught me about 18th century women's shoes not having a distinct right/left foot, explored the modern and commercial notion of the "celebutante," and taught me about the Texas Dip (I looked it up on YouTube when I finished and I just--). I think it is fascinating how the ritual has certainly come a long way from being a marriage market, emphasizing today (with mixed results) ideas like career success, networking, etc., but I think Richardson draws the right conclusion when she says the debutante ritual retains its male-dominated principles.
This book reminded me why I adore social histories. And women's history. I loved it so much!
This book reminded me why I adore social histories. And women's history. I loved it so much!
December 14, 2019
Had to make myself finish this one. I did learn things from reading (hence the two stars), but the interesting facts did not offset the hours spent slogging through what felt like a college research assignment. Most of the book reads like a literature review— any novel, newspaper, or documentary mentioning the society season included. It is sprinkled with a few of the author’s personal experiences written in such a way to make her unlikable— (I felt of out place without my own kid leather deb party gloves.) The attempt at cultural criticism is shallow (all examples of racially disparate balls ignored any northeast examples and tended to focus on the south.)
This book was a real disappointment.
This book was a real disappointment.
January 13, 2020
Fascinating book and subject matter. I grabbed this as an audio book and honestly didn't even know this was a non-fiction book. Kristen Richardson has done her homework. I must say I can better understand my favorite Jane Austen novels on a whole new level with the this information and importance of coming out to society. Sure enough after I listened to this book, Reese Witherspoon's daughter was just presented at the ball in France.
February 25, 2020
Interesting topic, but the book was dense and meandered. The writer included too many direct excerpts from primary sources rather than summarizing. Also, no mention was made about debuts and debutantes in other cultures within the US (i.e. Latinx, Filipino), which was disappointing.
September 4, 2020
I listened to the audio book, which was very well done. I enjoyed the book and its contents immensely. It was not only engaging but also educational. I would recommend it if you have ever been even remotely interested in the ritual of daughters of the upper class.
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