F*ck Your Diet: And Other Things My Thighs Tell Me

by Chloé Hilliard

*A Goodreads Choice Awards Finalist
*Named Best Comedy Book by the African American Literary Awards Show

Fans of Issa Rae and Phoebe Robinson will love this collection of laugh-out-loud funny and insightful essays that explore race, feminism, pop culture, and how society reinforces the message that we are nothing without the perfect body.

By the time Chloé Hilliard was 12, she wore a size 12—both shoe and dress—and stood over six feet tall. Fitting in was never an option. That didn’t stop her from trying. Cursed with a “slow metabolism,” “baby weight,” and “big bones,”—the fat trilogy—Chloe turned to fad diets, starvation, pills, and workouts, all of which failed.

Realizing that everything—from government policies to corporate capitalism—directly impacts our relationship with food and our waistlines, Chloé changed her outlook on herself and hopes others will do the same for themselves.

The perfect mix of cultural commentary, conspiracies, and confessions, F*ck Your Diet pokes fun at the all too familiar, misguided quest for better health, permanent weight loss, and a sense of self-worth.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Memoir, Audiobook, Essays, Feminism, Comedy

336 pages, Hardcover

First published January 7, 2020

About the author

Chloé Hilliard is a writer and comedian who first appeared as a semi-finalist on NBC’s Last Comic Standing and went on to appear on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, Comedy Central, MTV, VH1, and more. Prior to her comedy career, she was a culture and entertainment journalist whose work has been featured in The Village Voice, Essence, Vibe, and The Source.

(source: Amazon)

Reviews

[Nathalia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Chloe Hilliard pulls no punches with how she's struggled with dieting, weight loss, weight gain, body image, and learning to love the skin that she's in. Each chapters discusses different moments of her life - some of which are painful topics, but she's got a wicked sense of humor to cut the pain. This book is for anyone who's struggled with their weight and has finally decided that it's much better mentally, emotionally, and physically to try and be healthy rather than trying to be thin.

[Katy O.]

(free review copy) I fully admit I only got a few pages into this book, but I could tell immediately it was not for me. I thought it would be a body positive manifesto and instead it managed to condemn about 12 different foods in the first few pages and seems to ACTUALLY be a book about all the systemic reasons people might be of higher weights......it actually contains the sentence “No one wants to admit it, but a person doesn’t get fat by themselves” in a chapter titled “Diabetes for Breakfast” UMMM, YES THEY DO IF THAT’S THEIR BODY’S NATURAL SET POINT.

Anyone who knows anything about eating disorders and Health at Every Size and Intuitive Eating knows how triggering and harmful this can be, so I stopped reading immediately. And yes I know, maybe there’s other content later in the book that’s not harmful but when the first 3 pages triggered me so hard, why would I put myself through the trauma of getting to the rest of it???

[Renn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was expecting a body positive manifesto, but what I got was a funny book exploring why Americans are fat.

“Our food industry will gaslight you into thinking your extra pounds are the result of a lack of self-control and not the addictive additives or empty calories they fill our food with.”

Keep in mind that this book has a blind spot where trauma is concerned. If you’re interested in the link between trauma and weight-gain, I’d read Hunger by Roxane Gay instead.

There are some sticky spots where her comedy toes the edge, but she never crosses the line. Most of her comedy is drawn from her painful childhood memories, which I think is super badass. To reach a point where you’re able to reflect on your past through the healing lens of humor? #goals

In the end, I have no idea who I would recommend this to. If you’re someone who wants a laugh about your unhealthy relationship with food, this book is for you. If your unhealthy relationship with food causes you pain and suffering, this book might feel like a slap to the face. Read wisely.

[Susie Dumond · Rating 5 out of 5]

In this hilarious and refreshing memoir, comedian Chloe Hilliard takes on diet culture and the way society teaches us to think about our bodies. From junk food to the meat industry to standards of beauty, Hilliard has a lot to say, and I loved every word.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.

[Never Without a Book · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 but bumped to 4 because much of what Hilliard experienced with her body struggles, I did as well. This book is worth the read.


https://www.instagram.com/p/B7Vu7k1gp...

[Jessica Coyle · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am very sorry to report that not only is this book pretty unpleasant to read, I would also consider it extremely dangerous for anyone to read who struggles with any kind of eating malfunction (or honestly, anyone dealing with suicidal thoughts or any kind of depression or history of assault.) I read this thinking that it was going to be a book about body acceptance and rejecting the diet industry, but while the author does do some of that, she also buys into incredibly harmful myths about weight loss, engages in persistent and cruel body shaming herself (both toward herself and the people who surround her) as well as touting ridiculous pseudoscience like the blood type diet. She references a childhood suicide attempt with what I can only describe as the type of manic jokey attitude that if someone told you in public, you would later whisper that she hasn’t been in enough therapy. She references losing her virginity as a child in what can only be described as sexual assault with absolutely no reflection on how this may still be impacting her as an adult.

I found myself frequently shaking my head at the outdated information she has regarding the history of dieting and weight loss. For a former journalist, she doesn’t seem to have a lot of self-awareness. The part at the end where she talks about her interest in potentially getting plastic surgery someday made me the saddest. Please, keep this away from your fat friends. They deserve much much better.

Honestly, so does she. I really hope that she gets the help she needs so she can have a healthier attitude toward herself and her body.

[Heather Brose · Rating 4 out of 5]

*I received an advanced copy of this book from Gallery Books in exchange for an honest review.

"... perfection is overrated and impossible to achieve. Understanding that frees you up to focus on being healthy, unique, and confident. That is my prayer for you."

I really enjoyed reading "F*ck Your Diet: And Other Things My Thighs Tell Me". It was super relatable and educational. I experienced all the emotions while reading this book. I laughed out loud often, became teary eyed at some parts and angry at other times (due to the treatment toward Chloé), but overall I was inspired.

Although we differ in age and race, I felt like we had shared experiences to varying degrees with our relationship with food, being bullied because of weight, struggling with self worth, and trying out different diets/lifestyle choices (being vegetarian, vegan, etc).

I feel like Chloé was extremely courageous to share her experiences as it takes a lot of vulnerability to do so. I am thankful that she did, because it was comforting to know I wasn't alone in my own experiences with food, weight gain and self worth.

I really loved how funny this book was and how Chloé used humor to cut some of the seriousness. I usually listen to audio books of comedic writers like Mindy Kaling, Tiffany Haddish and Phoebe Robinson, but I still had laugh out loud moments despite not reading them in the pace/delivery exactly from the author.

I also really loved the research and history included in each chapter to get her point across. It was very compelling and I learned a ton I never knew about Reagan, Kellogg's, racial bias in healthcare and plastic surgery, just to name a few.

I hope other readers get as much as I did out of her memoir. It's certainly a journey and hard work towards loving the skin you're in and to focus on being healthy vs a weight goal. I felt like this book helped to give me some motivation to take steps towards loving myself and making better decisions.

Thank you for sharing a bit about your life, Chloé!

--- edit after I saw another review ---

I am sure there are going to be white people who feel butthurt about some of the things expressed in this book (as we can already see in some of these reviews). Chloé's experiences were totally valid and I hate that she had to experience the negative ones, especially those related to race. As a white person, I didn't feel like she was being racist in her book to share the experiences she had and her observations about the people involved in those experiences. In the summary of the book, it explicitly talks about how Chloé includes politics and race in her book, and I'm not sure what readers are going to expect since most POC experience racism from white people...I know the privilege I have as a white person and I don't get upset at the creator/writer/director when I watch/read/listen to something about the racism of white people. It makes me angry that it's still occurring and even angrier when white people say that a POC can be racist towards white people...no. Just no.

I can step back and understand that Chloé is making an observation about her experience, but doesn't feel every single white woman acts the way she described in her experiences working with white women...etc. If you're getting upset it's likely because what you're reading is hitting a little too close to home.

[Paige · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great read for all women, but especially for my generation who grew up with Regan's "Presidential Fitness Test," ketchup as a vegetable, parents on fad diets (then and STILL), and being constantly force-fed by your grandmother while she simultaneously fat-shames you.

[Amy · Rating 1 out of 5]

Too much politics and racism.

[sistaotey · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Race" is a relatively new social construct. A made up thing. Systemic racism is not.

I'll be buying 5 books to share with my other fat Black sistas who CLEARLY are considered invalid in their lived experiences by some reviewers.

No sista of MINE would vote not once, but twice for one of the most visible & public misogynistic bigots in the history of their nation.

Take your white tears and cry us a river.

True Love accepts the Truth rather it's warm & fuzzy or not.

Love the historical tidbits a lot!

Some parts made me blush.

Lots of laugh out loud and relatable moments.

I recommend every sista read it and get 2 for friends.

[Jquick99 · Rating 1 out of 5]

Didn’t know who she was when I got the book, and still don’t. Unsure how she got a book deal.

I suggest NOT to get the audiobook. The author reads her book, with unclear diction.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

She had me at the very first chapter about the horrible Presidential Fitness Test. Her insight definitely had me thinking through my own issues with food, body image, and family history. I didn’t agree with everything, but I really appreciate her honesty about these topics! Worth reading! 4 stars

[Kendall Culbertson · Rating 3 out of 5]

"On a bad day, they'd follow up with "I'm trying to lose five pounds." It's always five pounds. I've never been five pounds away from my goal, and if I was, I'd be so happy to be that close that I'd settle for keeping the five pounds."

3.5. This was an enjoyable read, and I identified a lot with the food and weight issues throughout. This book goes much deeper than I expected into the politics, socioeconomics, and racial inequalities that lead to widespread unhealthy lifestyles and lack of care. I feel like I learned quite a bit, especially in regards to the struggles of black women. That being said, the subjects felt a little all over the place and there wasn't a definitive flow. I didn't experience any laugh-out-loud moments, but Chloe Hilliard is indeed funny and entertaining. She shows a lot of vulnerability in this book and feels very authentic, which I always appreciate. I would recommend this book to anyone struggling with body image or societal standards.

[Jamie Studebaker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks to Goodreads for providing a giveaway copy of this book.

Let me start by saying I am a white female in my twenties. That being said, I love this book. I have a complicated relationship with my body and with food. I've been on both ends of the eating disorder spectrum; I've had anorexia and I've had binge eating disorder. I am frequently rubbing holes in the thighs of my jeans. Strangers have assumed that I am pregnant instead of fat. When I saw the title F*ck Your Diet: And Other Things My Thighs Tell Me, my thighs told me I needed to read this book, and they were right.

Given my age and my race, I got roughly 30% of the cultural references in the book, however, that's part of what was wonderful about the book. F*ck Your Diet immersed me in a different world, a world that exists next to, but separate from my own, due to our demographic differences. I consider it my responsibility as a white person to seek out perspectives from people of color. Hilliard had no qualms about pointing out racism and racial discrepancies, and while some of it was sobering to read, I am also very glad I read it. White privilege is real and it needs regular checking.

This book is so much more than essays or memoir; at least half of the book is journalism. I did not go into this book expecting to learn anything more than facts about the author's life. I was pleasantly surprised by the presence of historical context and supporting details, along with the exact sources listed in an appendix at the end. I wouldn't change anything about the book, however, if I had one wish it would be that there was a "clean" version, like with explicit music, that I could give to my mother and grandmother. There are so many important ideas in this book that I would love to have them read, and it's just too bad that the language is too inappropriate for my WASP-y family. Still 5 stars, though. My family's inability to handle it has no impact on how I feel about the book.

[EllenZReads · Rating 2 out of 5]

*Thanks to Goodreads and the publisher for a free advanced reader's copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.*

I wanted to love this book. And parts of it were very entertaining--Chloe Hilliard's description of meals with her grandparents, for example, reminded me of my own family's mealtimes, when I was growing up in the 1970s and 1980s. Sprinkled throughout the book are actual facts about nutrition and the food industry, some of which were quite interesting (did you know Kellogg invented cornflakes as a solution for masturbation?). She also discusses bullying and the origins of the Presidential Fitness Test (oh, how I hated that in junior high gym class) with a wry humor.

Ultimately, though, I was disappointed. She says it's not a diet book, but comments ad nauseum and in a very self-deprecating way about how big she was at certain times in her life, and towards the end of the book harps about vegetarianism or veganism being wonderful (in all honesty, I skipped most of that chapter. Vegetables are awesome. But I just didn't need a lecture.) I got tired of her fat shaming herself very quickly. And then she recommends "cleanses" as a way to keep fit. Ugh. Please don't.

I've been skinny and fat and skinny and then fat again at various times of my life, and throughout it all, I've started learning to accept myself and to believe that being fat is NOT some kind of failure. It seems like Hilliard believes this at the same time she talks about accepting her height (over six feet tall by age 12) and that she seems to be intimidating to men. I just felt like the book was full of mixed messages--it's ok to be a little fat, but not a lot fat, etc. I didn't find it nearly as funny and entertaining as I had expected.

[Dre · Rating 4 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this book. Chloé has a voice and perspective that we need to hear more of. Love how she told her story in conjunction to explaining the history and black perspective at the time of the issue... and she almost made me not want to eat meat when she was talking about an illness of unknown origin that she came down with that doctors thought she was faking until it became visible and how she suspects it was linked to what she was putting in her mouth... namely, meat from antibiotic resistant farm animals... see! My stomach just turned again. LOL. Smh.

[H.M. Gooden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Laugh out loud funny and worth a read. Facts about diet and food industry sprinkled liberally through with journalistic integrity smoothly stirred in with a comedic flair well worth reading. Pro tip- audiobook narrated by a comedian is great for long drives!

[Aya Imam · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought it was gonna be a light book about diet.
But it was much more deeper than that. I truly enjoyed it. ❤

[Lesley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fun, funny, informative and endearing. Hilliard is brand new to me and I appreciate this introduction.

[Kathryn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars
I actually quite enjoyed this (despite having never heard of the author before) and found it both funny and informative!

[Amy Barnet · Rating 3 out of 5]

meh

[Riham · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars.
Usually this is the type of book I read as lightweight reading. This served as that, but a lot of this book really spoke to me, so some parts felt heavier than I expected them to.

[Erinp · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm going to round up to a 5, this is at least a 4.5. I loved this book. I loved Chloe. I loved her honesty. I've been reading books by non-white authors and I think I learned more about systemic oppression from this book then from books that focus on it. Hilarious and important right now (and always), would recommend.

[Jocelyn Leigh · Rating 1 out of 5]

By the author's own admission, "I'm no food guru, life coach, or empowerment princess." Though according to the book sleeve bio, she is a comedian. I did not find this book to be funny, informative, or really interesting or original in any way. I read to the end, hoping it would improve - no such luck. While her data on discrimination holds, I couldn't shake the sense that her reflections on her own lived personal experiences lacked actual self-reflection and nuance. To her credit, there are so many ways to be treated like shit as a young, black, working-class female, it can be challenging to pinpoint exactly why you're being mistreated at any given point in time. My review might be tossed aside because of my race (read: white), but I wanted to hate the same nauseating office culture she hated (women who spend their days at work Googling how many calories are in a pistachio), and rebel against the same carbon-copy uniformity demanded to achieve the ever-illusive "cultural fit" (please do not talk to me about your new Allbirds or waist-cinching belt some Instagram model conned you into spending actual dollars on). It felt like while I wanted to agree with her and root for her and be on the same team, bad experiences always boiled down to "fuck white people" rather than dissecting the full array of bullshit that was likely at play, oftentimes along with racism.
-Did the hospital assume you were healthy because you were young and had no prior history of medical illness? Nah, gotta be racism. But also, you spoke up and advocated for yourself until you got the care you needed and that's fantastic!
-Did your high school sweetheart leave you a bruise because you were rough housing and took the first swing? I'm 100% here to believe women, but if you throw the first punch, I'm inclined to ask some questions as to whether or not it was reasonable for him to try and get you to stop hitting him.
-Was that high school dude shitty? Absolutely. Did you know that and still go back for more? YES.

In summary, this felt like a story meant to come from a place of hard-won self-love and maturity, but fell short due to lack of self-reflection, self-awareness, and an overarching view of all white women as a monolith. Girl, you went to NYU and worked at Lifetime magazine, of course you were surrounded by rich-ass white ladies whose self-worth could be weighed on a scale! Come eat a cookie, meet some normals outside of Manhattan, and let's all hate on this shit together.

*P.S. I just watched some of the author's standup for the first time, and it was a completely different experience than reading the book. She's funny! Maybe a collection of essays wasn't the best format for her comedy, but her standup is worth a watch.

---
"The Jews made me fat. Chocolate rugelach is my shit."

"I would've escaped out the window, like every kid on TV did when [why] they got into hot water, but this was Brooklyn. There were bars on the windows. Ramona Quimby would never have had to deal with this."

"Some people had generational wealth; we had recipes. Grandma's 'hard-earned' food was our inheritance."

"Pop culture was going to do the work that policy and Mother Nature could not."

"White women didn't need to stop calling themselves 'princesses' and start saying and believing they were 'Strong Women' because they'd rather be saved and coveted than held accountable for themselves."

"Frozen's Elsa could be considered a strong white woman. Of course they portrayed her as a single ice queen who lacked social skills. Subliminal message received: No one wants a strong white woman."

"To be young is to live free because you're too stupid to know limitations and are fearless as a result of that."

"But you said you wanted diversity. Does that not include diversity of thought?"

"Saying 'I'm confused' is the best information tactic I learned from my passive-aggressive white colleagues at Lifetime...When used during a tense exchange, 'I'm confused,' puts the responsibility on the other party to explain themselves, thus giving you the ammo to hold them accountable for their words."

"Something needs to be said about the cost of peace of mind."

"You don't notice it at first, what with the waving flags, big cars, large iced coffees, sports jerseys, and selfies, but look closely and you'll see a malaise growing like mold. Melancholy is in the air. Americans are miserable, and it might be because of what we put in our bodies."

[Camee · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars. I really enjoyed Hilliard's frankness and openness about growing up as a tall "big" girl. Her stories of yo yo dieting and get skinny quick schemes were all too familiar. She also added nice touches about her family, friends, and discovering a love for stand up comedy.
I didn't feel like this book was particularly a body positivity manifesto. Hilliard gave a lot of facts and figures around weight and numerous scenarios around being put down because of her weight, but there was never really a sense of her supporting loving yourself for who you are until the very last pages. Mostly it was just relatable stories that reminded me of all the times I have hated myself because of my size. I was hoping to read something that lifted me up and made me feel positive, but this just didn't fall into that category.

[Jenna Blair · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was hilarious - I couldn’t put it down. I loved her recounts (often funny) on her life growing up in the 90’s and working in the 2000’s. She takes us beyond her struggle with food and touches on love, relationships, climbing the cooperate ladder with a little politics thrown in. No matter where you fall on the political spectrum you may learn a thing or two (from the perspective of a strong, smart, black woman in America) and certainly laugh along the way!

[Lelia Nebeker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Her humor comes through in every story, but you really see her background as a journalist as she offers thoroughly researched asides that touch on issues related to America's relationship with food. She uses her own experiences to shed light on racism, socioeconomic issues, and how Western culture views women's bodies. This book has much more sustenance to it than the popcorn and cookies on the cover would lead you to believe!

[Marisha Murphy · Rating 4 out of 5]

F*ck Your Diet and Other Things My Thighs Tell Me really is a hilarious collection of conspiracy, culture, confessions. Each essay tells the tale of her life and relationship with food in pieces. I enjoyed the facts she said infused in all her stories. Very relatable, funny, and informative. My favorite combo.

[Lauren Bourke · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny and eye opening. Not just an autobiographical journey of a talented woman, but also a highly informative book about the many factors that contribute obesity and body image problems in this country. A serious subject related in a very personal and relatable way that also entertains the reader. I highly recommend.

[MsWilliamsWorld]

Chloe Hilliard - I have a feeling we're gonna see more from her in the future! What I loved most about this book was the seamless way her journalism background and comedic skills are merged in a way that keeps the reader engaged. It was funny where it needed to be and poignant where it HAD to be. I really dug it!