( I welcome this bold crusade to rescue celibacy from the scorn into which it has fallen. Her championship of chastity will be welcomed by many. Mary Kenny, Sunday TelegraphThis book is not designed from the point of view of any particular religion.Celibacy is valid, healthy and spiritual.)
Liz Hodgkinson is an author and journalist who has written more than 50 books on a wide variety of subjects including biography, autobiography, health, personal growth, property and relationships.
It's disappointing to find that the only book on secular celibacy I've ever seen is actually just a terribly negative screed written by the type of person who gives feminism a bad name.
The book doesn't deal with any sort of techniques as to how to live celibate; rather, it treats the idea as something that can simply be done cold-turkey with condescending asides effectively saying "maybe it takes a little time for some people." It offers zero practical coping mechanisms for such a lifestyle, and simply brushes aside the problems of those who are celibate by circumstance rather than by choice.
Furthermore, the sketchy (in all senses of the word) logic raises questions about the scientific knowledge and thinking of the journalist author.
Perhaps most fundamentally irritating is that the book seems to assume that intimate companionship and sex are not fundamentally intertwined or that they can be separated easily and effectively (later chapters do ease up on this a bit, but that lends itself to a general feeling of inconsistency permeating the book). I would be the first person to agree that the two are not the same thing, but Hodgkinson makes the self-righteous assumption, as do so many others, that intimate relationships are forthcoming and available and that sex is simply there to confuse things.
It puts those like me, who find sex difficult because they (we) consider sex to be something intimate yet are fundamentally stymied by others' refusal to enter into intimate relationships with us, in the same position as before: up the creek.
There's probably a reason this book is out of print.
This book is interesting in that the author and a number of the couples she interviewed, have been able to transform their marriages from sexual, into celibate and functional.
There are also several informative sections on health. However, the food section has some advice which is wrong, considering that most people need meat in our diets because vegetables are water soluble and by themselves, don't provide enough nutrients. On an omnivore (keto) diet, my libido has not been increased, so that claim in this book is false.
There are also a lot of fun little stories about famous people who were celibate, and more to enjoy in this book.