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The Weight of a Thousand Feathers
From the acclaimed author of When Mr. Dog Bites and The Bombs That Brought Us Together comes a compelling, thought-provoking, heartbreaking, and timely story that how far would you go for family? As the person who cares for his terminally-ill mother, Bobby Seed has a lot on his plate. Add to that a responsibility to watch over his little brother (with his endless question about why their mother is in so much pain), keeping up at school, and navigating a relationship with a girl friend who wants to be a girlfriend, and he's barely keeping his head above the water. Something's got to give.But then Bobby's mother makes a request, one that seems impossible. If he agrees, he won't just be soothing her pain. He'll be helping her end it -- and end everything. Angry, stirring, and tender, this bold novel tells a story of choice and compassion, exploring the lengths to which we'll go for the people we love.
364 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 14, 2018
39 people are currently reading
1600 people want to read
About the author
Brian Conaghan
15 books97 followersBrian Conaghan lives and works in the Scottish town of Coatbridge. He has a Master of Letters in Creative Writing from the University of Glasgow, and worked as a teacher for many years. His novel When Mr Dog Bites was shortlisted for the 2015 CILIP Carnegie Medal. The Bombs That Brought Us Together won the 2016 Costa Children’s Book Award, The Weight of a Thousand Feathers won the 2018 Irish Book Award for Teen/YA Book of the Year, and We Come Apart, a verse novel co-authored with Carnegie Medal-winner Sarah Crossan, won the 2018 UKLA Book Award. Cardboard Cowboys, Brian’s first middle-grade novel, published in 2021 and is full of his trademark heart, humour and crackling dialogue. Swimming on the Moon is his second middle-grade novel. @ConaghanAuthor
@BrianConaghan
@BrianConaghan
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 238 reviews
August 31, 2018
This is a five star story with two star writing.
July 2, 2018
Bobby Seed is your average sixteen-year-old boy. His worries include relationship drama, school worries, and concerns over his future profession. They also include whether his little brother has a clean school uniform to wear to school and whether his mother will be able to leave her bedroom at all today. For whilst Bobby Seed is an average individual his role as carer to his family also means, as much as he would like it to be true, his concerns often are not.
Initially I found that whilst the story-line was as hard-hitting as I had anticipated it to be, I did not bond with the characters as completely as I would have liked. I prefer my teenage characters to be of the more pretentiously John Green variety and so it took a few chapters for me to assimilate to ones who were not. This, however, was only a minor and fleeting concern and the predicaments the individuals were situated in made it a trifling and soon forgotten matter.
A young carer is not a viewpoint I have read from before and I found the burden he is placed under, the grief at witnessing his mother's decline, and the guilt he experiences when his thoughts dwell on any other concern but his family's, really made me aware of the strain of his position. This also delivered an opposing view, where the reader gets to experience Bobby's acts as purely ones of love and not burdens he feels placed under at all. He does what he does because his mother needs him to, and it is as simple and as selfless as that.
As Bobby's mother succumbs to her illness the emotions of this piece were continually heightened until not a chapter passed without it blurring due to the tears filling my eyes. Ethically grey areas were covered and, as before, I thought the author did so with a wonderful sensitivity whilst delivering both possible sides of the narrative.
This is one of those profound books that every individual needs to read and one that provides a rare and startingly bleak insight to human emotion.
Initially I found that whilst the story-line was as hard-hitting as I had anticipated it to be, I did not bond with the characters as completely as I would have liked. I prefer my teenage characters to be of the more pretentiously John Green variety and so it took a few chapters for me to assimilate to ones who were not. This, however, was only a minor and fleeting concern and the predicaments the individuals were situated in made it a trifling and soon forgotten matter.
A young carer is not a viewpoint I have read from before and I found the burden he is placed under, the grief at witnessing his mother's decline, and the guilt he experiences when his thoughts dwell on any other concern but his family's, really made me aware of the strain of his position. This also delivered an opposing view, where the reader gets to experience Bobby's acts as purely ones of love and not burdens he feels placed under at all. He does what he does because his mother needs him to, and it is as simple and as selfless as that.
As Bobby's mother succumbs to her illness the emotions of this piece were continually heightened until not a chapter passed without it blurring due to the tears filling my eyes. Ethically grey areas were covered and, as before, I thought the author did so with a wonderful sensitivity whilst delivering both possible sides of the narrative.
This is one of those profound books that every individual needs to read and one that provides a rare and startingly bleak insight to human emotion.
June 6, 2018
Oh this is such a charged book. So many things to think about and process. Bobby Seed is a 17 year old boy dealing with far too much. There is his mum, dying of MS, his handful of a younger brother Dan who doesn't really understand what is happening to their mum and Bel, friendzoned when she doesn't want to be and helping Bobby shoulder responsibility out of the goodness of her heart. All this responsibility is wearing for Bobby, a mum who can't look after either him or his brother and all the drama of daily teenage life, it is boring, it is relentless, it sucks and it is only going to get worse as his mum gets worse.
Then Bobby is encouraged to go to a group for those caring for an ill parent and whammo, there he meets Lou, exotic, sexy as all get out and equipped with a vintage Vespa. And Lou likes Bobby, starts hanging with him and because they have shared experience and plenty in common it seems they might have something more than friendship looming. But, Lou is tricky, he tells stories, is he to be trusted? As things move along, mum getting worse, Dan being Dan, Bel always there and Bobby's guilt getting larger and larger, it all gets so incredibly complicated. Lou is possibly more than he seems. A crisis point is reached when mum asks Bobby to help her die.
This is a slow, thoughtful novel. It is full of Bobby's angst at the terrible situation he finds himself in. This huge responsibility, weighted with love for Dan and his mum, his grief and his heartache. Interwoven are his thoughts on his emerging sexuality and confusion at the way Lou treats him and all the weirdness surrounding the way Lou acts. I loved the character of Bel, so kind, tolerant and so willing to help so that she doesn't have to deal with her own terrible homelife.
This would be a wonderful novel for students to study, so full of moral complexity and full of heart. You root for Bobby, you want him and Dan to be ok. This novel is one which will make you think and feel. I'll definitely be buying it for our library.
Then Bobby is encouraged to go to a group for those caring for an ill parent and whammo, there he meets Lou, exotic, sexy as all get out and equipped with a vintage Vespa. And Lou likes Bobby, starts hanging with him and because they have shared experience and plenty in common it seems they might have something more than friendship looming. But, Lou is tricky, he tells stories, is he to be trusted? As things move along, mum getting worse, Dan being Dan, Bel always there and Bobby's guilt getting larger and larger, it all gets so incredibly complicated. Lou is possibly more than he seems. A crisis point is reached when mum asks Bobby to help her die.
This is a slow, thoughtful novel. It is full of Bobby's angst at the terrible situation he finds himself in. This huge responsibility, weighted with love for Dan and his mum, his grief and his heartache. Interwoven are his thoughts on his emerging sexuality and confusion at the way Lou treats him and all the weirdness surrounding the way Lou acts. I loved the character of Bel, so kind, tolerant and so willing to help so that she doesn't have to deal with her own terrible homelife.
This would be a wonderful novel for students to study, so full of moral complexity and full of heart. You root for Bobby, you want him and Dan to be ok. This novel is one which will make you think and feel. I'll definitely be buying it for our library.
February 19, 2022
yes i got it because it was on sale for 3euros and because i also really liked the color of the cover BUT it sounded like something i would love. may not be crazy about YA but i usually like coming of age stories. this though was boring. not that crazy about the writing style and overall i was bored. being on page 90 and thinking when the fuck will it finally end isn't that great of a sign.
also there is a lot of poetry in this and i don't like poetry 👍🏻. great plot but bad execution.
also there is a lot of poetry in this and i don't like poetry 👍🏻. great plot but bad execution.
June 16, 2018
I got sent this book in exchange for a honest review, all my opinions are my own and thank you so much to the publishers for sending me this book!
So in this story we follow Bobby, who is a young carer. His mother is dying of MS and his brother is not exactly an angel. In this story we take on Bobby's perspective on sexuality, young carers and assisted suicide.
I thought this book was very well written and very realistic. The reason I couldn't rate it higher was because of my own enjoyment, I rate my books on how I enjoyed them not for writing style and creativity. So i did enjoy this book but not enough for a higher rating.
I liked being put into the story because I've not had any experience or known of any experiences in my life of being a young carer. So it was good to see the challenges Bobby faces in his every day life and I thought that aspect of the story was very well done.
When it comes to assisted suicide, it's a very grey area and there is no way of me expressing in words how it's a terrible thing to think about but also the fact that many people do suffer from illness' that make them depressed or physically unable to do anything and if that's the extreme. Is it okay to help someone in that state end their life?
Overall there was a lot to Bobby's story that moved me and made me feel things for him but as I said this book wasn't the best thing I've ever read.
So in this story we follow Bobby, who is a young carer. His mother is dying of MS and his brother is not exactly an angel. In this story we take on Bobby's perspective on sexuality, young carers and assisted suicide.
I thought this book was very well written and very realistic. The reason I couldn't rate it higher was because of my own enjoyment, I rate my books on how I enjoyed them not for writing style and creativity. So i did enjoy this book but not enough for a higher rating.
I liked being put into the story because I've not had any experience or known of any experiences in my life of being a young carer. So it was good to see the challenges Bobby faces in his every day life and I thought that aspect of the story was very well done.
When it comes to assisted suicide, it's a very grey area and there is no way of me expressing in words how it's a terrible thing to think about but also the fact that many people do suffer from illness' that make them depressed or physically unable to do anything and if that's the extreme. Is it okay to help someone in that state end their life?
Overall there was a lot to Bobby's story that moved me and made me feel things for him but as I said this book wasn't the best thing I've ever read.
June 17, 2018
"I feel the weight of its thousand feathers pressing, pressing, pressing me down."
4.5 stars.
Thanks to Bloomsbury Australia for sending me a copy to review.
"There've been loads of days when she's too shattered to laugh, too sore to speak. But I know I'll miss these moments. Give me misery over nothing any day."
The Weight of a Thousand Feathers is a heartbreaking and emotional story about a teenage boy who should be spending his time doing school work and hanging out with his friends, but instead has to look after his dying mother with MS and handful of a younger brother. It's thought provoking and hard to read at times, but a story that needs to be told; one that isn't seen a lot in YA.
"We hold each other until the well runs dry."
I read We Come Apart which Brian Conaghan cowrote with Sarah Crossan last year(?) and loved it. That books was written in verse, and TWoaTF is written in normal prose, however, he still manages to write so beautifully. As you might be able to tell from the quotes I've included in this review (because I tabbed so many of them while reading), his writing style is poetic and angelic and it kept me captivated the whole time.
"I can't imagine where her mind travels to, all I can hope is that it's somewhere magical."
Bobby is a HERO. He's a teenager, trying to find himself and who he is, but he has so much on his plate. When he joins Poztive, a support group for young carers like Bobby, he realises that he really isn't alone, and a lot of other kids are in the same boat. Seeing him develop over the course of the novel is really beautiful, and I'm sure it brings a lot of hope to people going through a similar thing. He's also discovering his identity and sexuality; all things that were handled and developed really well.
"It's not living. It's existing, existing inside a bag of bones. I'm turning into a shell... Without a voice, what's the point?"
Although this is an incredibly emotional story, there's also a lot of humour scattered throughout which kind of eased me a bit. It was nice to laugh in between breaks of crying. It also gave us a good idea about Bobby's home life and his relationship with his mother. Their banter was such a beautiful thing to see. Despite what they're going through, it was lovely to see an amazing and supportive mother-son relationship. Family relationships are obviously a major theme in the novel, and I think it was portrayed really well.
"The very notion of it makes me gasp for air, and sometimes when I gasp for the air I can't feel it entering my lungs. I can't feel it. I think that gasp will be my last one."
Obviously, there are some pretty tough themes and scenes in this book, so don't read it without a box of tissues by your side. I cried for the last 50 pages or so. A major aspect is the right to your own life, and your right to die when you feel your time has come. They're hard stuff to read about, and it was really confronting in the book, but I liked how real it was. I haven't read many books about it (I don't think any have been in young adult books), so I appreciate that the issue and idea was tackled in this book.
"I mean... what I mean is... that... sometimes hope is all we have. Hope is what we cling to, right?"
I didn't understand the last line of the book (whether it was serious, or just a joke between the two characters), so someone help me out?? But overall, I LOVED this book so much. It was confronting and emotional and heartbreaking, but also educational and a story that needs to be told.
"Mum's room. It's rammed with laughter and happy memories. I'll just paint over the others that linger."
4.5 stars.
Thanks to Bloomsbury Australia for sending me a copy to review.
"There've been loads of days when she's too shattered to laugh, too sore to speak. But I know I'll miss these moments. Give me misery over nothing any day."
The Weight of a Thousand Feathers is a heartbreaking and emotional story about a teenage boy who should be spending his time doing school work and hanging out with his friends, but instead has to look after his dying mother with MS and handful of a younger brother. It's thought provoking and hard to read at times, but a story that needs to be told; one that isn't seen a lot in YA.
"We hold each other until the well runs dry."
I read We Come Apart which Brian Conaghan cowrote with Sarah Crossan last year(?) and loved it. That books was written in verse, and TWoaTF is written in normal prose, however, he still manages to write so beautifully. As you might be able to tell from the quotes I've included in this review (because I tabbed so many of them while reading), his writing style is poetic and angelic and it kept me captivated the whole time.
"I can't imagine where her mind travels to, all I can hope is that it's somewhere magical."
Bobby is a HERO. He's a teenager, trying to find himself and who he is, but he has so much on his plate. When he joins Poztive, a support group for young carers like Bobby, he realises that he really isn't alone, and a lot of other kids are in the same boat. Seeing him develop over the course of the novel is really beautiful, and I'm sure it brings a lot of hope to people going through a similar thing. He's also discovering his identity and sexuality; all things that were handled and developed really well.
"It's not living. It's existing, existing inside a bag of bones. I'm turning into a shell... Without a voice, what's the point?"
Although this is an incredibly emotional story, there's also a lot of humour scattered throughout which kind of eased me a bit. It was nice to laugh in between breaks of crying. It also gave us a good idea about Bobby's home life and his relationship with his mother. Their banter was such a beautiful thing to see. Despite what they're going through, it was lovely to see an amazing and supportive mother-son relationship. Family relationships are obviously a major theme in the novel, and I think it was portrayed really well.
"The very notion of it makes me gasp for air, and sometimes when I gasp for the air I can't feel it entering my lungs. I can't feel it. I think that gasp will be my last one."
Obviously, there are some pretty tough themes and scenes in this book, so don't read it without a box of tissues by your side. I cried for the last 50 pages or so. A major aspect is the right to your own life, and your right to die when you feel your time has come. They're hard stuff to read about, and it was really confronting in the book, but I liked how real it was. I haven't read many books about it (I don't think any have been in young adult books), so I appreciate that the issue and idea was tackled in this book.
"I mean... what I mean is... that... sometimes hope is all we have. Hope is what we cling to, right?"
I didn't understand the last line of the book (whether it was serious, or just a joke between the two characters), so someone help me out?? But overall, I LOVED this book so much. It was confronting and emotional and heartbreaking, but also educational and a story that needs to be told.
"Mum's room. It's rammed with laughter and happy memories. I'll just paint over the others that linger."
September 20, 2018
This is a surprise YA book I received from Bloomsbury Australia and didn't know anything about. But as soon as I picked it up, I got swept up in all of the emotion.
Bobby Seed is an average teenager going through the same stuff as other guys. Except, he's not so average. He might be young, but he's not carefree. His mum is sick, so he's a carer. And then, there's his younger brother. And cleaning, washing, dusting. Not to mention homework and tests.
At least he's got a trusty best friend in Bel. She's always there to help. Although, things aren't straightforward with her either, because she might want to be more than friends.
When Bobby starts going to a young carer's peer-group meeting and is introduced to a bunch of kids in similar situations, he realises he's not alone. He gets some well-deserved time away, even if he can't help but feel guilty and misses his mother.
And then there's Lou. The guy with a vintage Vespa, the guy who stirs some pretty intense reactions in Bobby. Suddenly, everything gets more complicated, but nothing's as bad as his mother's unexpected request...
O.M.G.
This book was an addiction I picked up earlier this week and couldn't put down. I intended to read the first chapter to get a taste and ended up reading over 50 pages!
Bobby's narrative hooked me into the story right away. His complicated life kept me turning the page. The banter between the characters--especially between Bobby and his mother--was SO good I couldn't help but cackle.
What I found so amazing about this story is how the writing style dragged me through all the heartbreak, all the hardships until I felt like I was on a roller-coaster ride of emotions. Yet, before I could get too upset, the humour picked me up and made everything so much lighter.
The characters were another thing that I loved. Bobby is such a nice guy, but has his own faults. Bel is a great friend, even if she has her own agenda. Danny is such a sweetheart, and so much smarter than everyone thinks. Lou, well, he was a good dose of good guy, bad guy, and totally messed up guy. A good example of how such a serious experience alters a young life, changes a person forever.
I thought the poems were a nice addition, too.
The Weight of a Thousand Feathers is such a fantastic story about one teenager's journey through the super tough life of a carer. His devotion and determination, and just how he deals with the harsh reality he's been dealt is admirable. What Bobby and his brother face would destroy a weaker person, and that ending is both heartbreaking and hopeful.
I absolutely adored everything about this book. The characters got under my skin, the story led me down a dark path, the very sad consequences affected me deeply, and it made me laugh out loud so many times.
Plus, after finishing the book, I realised just how awesome the title is!
Bobby Seed is an average teenager going through the same stuff as other guys. Except, he's not so average. He might be young, but he's not carefree. His mum is sick, so he's a carer. And then, there's his younger brother. And cleaning, washing, dusting. Not to mention homework and tests.
At least he's got a trusty best friend in Bel. She's always there to help. Although, things aren't straightforward with her either, because she might want to be more than friends.
When Bobby starts going to a young carer's peer-group meeting and is introduced to a bunch of kids in similar situations, he realises he's not alone. He gets some well-deserved time away, even if he can't help but feel guilty and misses his mother.
And then there's Lou. The guy with a vintage Vespa, the guy who stirs some pretty intense reactions in Bobby. Suddenly, everything gets more complicated, but nothing's as bad as his mother's unexpected request...
O.M.G.
This book was an addiction I picked up earlier this week and couldn't put down. I intended to read the first chapter to get a taste and ended up reading over 50 pages!
Bobby's narrative hooked me into the story right away. His complicated life kept me turning the page. The banter between the characters--especially between Bobby and his mother--was SO good I couldn't help but cackle.
What I found so amazing about this story is how the writing style dragged me through all the heartbreak, all the hardships until I felt like I was on a roller-coaster ride of emotions. Yet, before I could get too upset, the humour picked me up and made everything so much lighter.
The characters were another thing that I loved. Bobby is such a nice guy, but has his own faults. Bel is a great friend, even if she has her own agenda. Danny is such a sweetheart, and so much smarter than everyone thinks. Lou, well, he was a good dose of good guy, bad guy, and totally messed up guy. A good example of how such a serious experience alters a young life, changes a person forever.
I thought the poems were a nice addition, too.
The Weight of a Thousand Feathers is such a fantastic story about one teenager's journey through the super tough life of a carer. His devotion and determination, and just how he deals with the harsh reality he's been dealt is admirable. What Bobby and his brother face would destroy a weaker person, and that ending is both heartbreaking and hopeful.
I absolutely adored everything about this book. The characters got under my skin, the story led me down a dark path, the very sad consequences affected me deeply, and it made me laugh out loud so many times.
Plus, after finishing the book, I realised just how awesome the title is!
September 25, 2018
[ARC Copy]
I am so glad I picked up this book. It is so, so important. Being a young carer was not easy for the MC, Bobby Seed. This book helps you to understand his situation, how he felt and it's very genuine.
This book to me was very focused. The author knew what he wanted to write and the message was very clear. The writing style was easy to follow. The characters were all significant, especially Lou. He was pressing Bobby, influencing him. To me, he was like this perfect 'evil voice' that kept whispering things to Bobby. But when his character was somehow left out somewhere because of an argument and it was not resolved at all, even when the story ended, Idk what to feel. Maybe that's the way of the author saying, "Bobby has faced his fear and has ended the 'evil voice'. "
The ending though, I'm not too sure... I like it that way but I'd like to know more as well. I'm not sure if the finished version of this book had a more finished ending or it's just the same.
Nevertheless, I enjoyed reading this book. It made me emotional at times. Beautifully written.
Thank you #pansing for sending me this review copy.
I am so glad I picked up this book. It is so, so important. Being a young carer was not easy for the MC, Bobby Seed. This book helps you to understand his situation, how he felt and it's very genuine.
This book to me was very focused. The author knew what he wanted to write and the message was very clear. The writing style was easy to follow. The characters were all significant, especially Lou. He was pressing Bobby, influencing him. To me, he was like this perfect 'evil voice' that kept whispering things to Bobby. But when his character was somehow left out somewhere because of an argument and it was not resolved at all, even when the story ended, Idk what to feel. Maybe that's the way of the author saying, "Bobby has faced his fear and has ended the 'evil voice'. "
The ending though, I'm not too sure... I like it that way but I'd like to know more as well. I'm not sure if the finished version of this book had a more finished ending or it's just the same.
Nevertheless, I enjoyed reading this book. It made me emotional at times. Beautifully written.
Thank you #pansing for sending me this review copy.
March 9, 2020
This was fine. It wasn't bad, but any stretch of the word, but I didn't emotionally connect with this as much as I maybe wanted to. I also feel like too much of this book is given away in the blurb!
March 23, 2018
Bobby is a boy with a lot on his mind, getting his mum her pills and aiding her around their home as well as looking after his brother, Danny a few years younger than his seventeen, too.
He has a good friend in Bel whom fancies him but nonetheless stays his best friend and helps watch over his mum while he goes to young carer meetings.
It's at the young carer meetings he has the chance of a break, a short holiday whilst also making friends with other young careers including Lou a boy he has strong feelings towards as he doesn't romantically like Bel but Lou.
At home he watches his mum deteriorate more into her illness day by day and it saddens him, upsets and frustrates his mum that she can't care for her children but that they have to role reverse and care for her. As her MS starts to cause more and more bodily failures, she asks her Bobby to end her life as is worsening quicker and wishes for no more suffering.
Meanwhile his friend Lou becomes a rock for him as well as his poetry to release his emotions and he finds out secrets can make or break a bond as truths get shared.
This is a heartbreakingly beautiful story. I picked this book as I know an MS sufferer and seen her struggles develop year after year since her diagnosis. I personally have the pain condition fibromyalgia and osteoporosis and spend days in a different but not dissimilar completely status of pain. Sharing tales of suffering and hardship on family members like in this book is key to letting others know they can reach out no matter how hard it may seem, someone will get it, guaranteed. The struggles the family face are alike so many real life experiences and the moral right or wrong of what their mum asks for is often talked about and debated.
Overall, this book has many fun moments that are sweet between mum and son but mostly is a heartbreaker.
Many thanks to the publishers for allowing me to review this book for them!
He has a good friend in Bel whom fancies him but nonetheless stays his best friend and helps watch over his mum while he goes to young carer meetings.
It's at the young carer meetings he has the chance of a break, a short holiday whilst also making friends with other young careers including Lou a boy he has strong feelings towards as he doesn't romantically like Bel but Lou.
At home he watches his mum deteriorate more into her illness day by day and it saddens him, upsets and frustrates his mum that she can't care for her children but that they have to role reverse and care for her. As her MS starts to cause more and more bodily failures, she asks her Bobby to end her life as is worsening quicker and wishes for no more suffering.
Meanwhile his friend Lou becomes a rock for him as well as his poetry to release his emotions and he finds out secrets can make or break a bond as truths get shared.
This is a heartbreakingly beautiful story. I picked this book as I know an MS sufferer and seen her struggles develop year after year since her diagnosis. I personally have the pain condition fibromyalgia and osteoporosis and spend days in a different but not dissimilar completely status of pain. Sharing tales of suffering and hardship on family members like in this book is key to letting others know they can reach out no matter how hard it may seem, someone will get it, guaranteed. The struggles the family face are alike so many real life experiences and the moral right or wrong of what their mum asks for is often talked about and debated.
Overall, this book has many fun moments that are sweet between mum and son but mostly is a heartbreaker.
Many thanks to the publishers for allowing me to review this book for them!
July 12, 2018
Bobby Seed is a 17-year-old boy who has the enormous burden of being the carer for his mum who has MS. We join his life as she is starting to get much worse and is essentially bed bound. Bobby has to feed her, wash her, help her to the toilet, try to sooth her pain and look after the house, all while trying to lead a normal teenage life and go to school.
He also cares for his 14-year-old brother Danny, who has learning difficulties. He doesn’t have many friends or do the normal teenage stuff boys do – all his time is taken up being the lynchpin that keeps his family together.
His school refers him to a young carers support group, Poztive, where Bobby meet Lou, an American boy whom he is immediately attracted to.
Then as his mum worsens she asks Bobby to give her the ultimate gift, to end her life for her.
I’d really been looking forward to reading this after hearing a friend gush about it on Twitter, and it didn’t disappoint. This is an amazing book – Conaghan writes convincingly as a 17-year-old boy – Bobby is a touching character. There is no sense of him ever complaining about his role (which would be completely understandable if he did!) but we do hear how difficult it is for him, especially knowing how it will get harder before she eventually dies. He hates her suffering and obviously loves her dearly. The pressure on him is immense and he has no one to share it with (except his friend Bel). Although this could be a depressing book the black humour between Bobby and his mum helps to keep the tone a bit lighter.
The topics of a gay awakening and of assisted suicide are handled with sensitivity. The book conveys how devastating the decision to carry out such an act for a loved one is.
Many thanks to Bloomsbury for sending a copy my way.
He also cares for his 14-year-old brother Danny, who has learning difficulties. He doesn’t have many friends or do the normal teenage stuff boys do – all his time is taken up being the lynchpin that keeps his family together.
His school refers him to a young carers support group, Poztive, where Bobby meet Lou, an American boy whom he is immediately attracted to.
Then as his mum worsens she asks Bobby to give her the ultimate gift, to end her life for her.
I’d really been looking forward to reading this after hearing a friend gush about it on Twitter, and it didn’t disappoint. This is an amazing book – Conaghan writes convincingly as a 17-year-old boy – Bobby is a touching character. There is no sense of him ever complaining about his role (which would be completely understandable if he did!) but we do hear how difficult it is for him, especially knowing how it will get harder before she eventually dies. He hates her suffering and obviously loves her dearly. The pressure on him is immense and he has no one to share it with (except his friend Bel). Although this could be a depressing book the black humour between Bobby and his mum helps to keep the tone a bit lighter.
The topics of a gay awakening and of assisted suicide are handled with sensitivity. The book conveys how devastating the decision to carry out such an act for a loved one is.
Many thanks to Bloomsbury for sending a copy my way.
August 11, 2018
This is a really intense, thought provoking book. Bobby has a very distinct voice, and I loved his interactions with Bel and Danny. I liked the writing style, it was full of dry humour and Scottish slang, and it made me feel really close to Bobby as a character. I didn't love Lou, I just couldn't get a read on him and his role in the story was a bit convenient and then towards the end I felt like a lot of aspects of his character and his motivations weren't explained and he was just a bit of a confusing character, and I never really felt any kind of chemistry betwren him and Bobby so found their interactions realky awkward. I did love the style of writing and the poems throughout, and found thia a pretty tough book to read at times. It definitely gets heavier as the book- and Bobby's mum's disease- progresses, and by the end I was a wreck. Definitely a powerful book!
September 24, 2018
Review to come.
August 8, 2018
Ik hoopte op een echt tranenmettuitenverhaal en dat viel tegen.
May 26, 2018
"MS is a slow burner. It waxes, wanes, skips along. Sometimes I wish she had the Big C instead; at least the Big C can be found, fought and defeated. Let's leave it at that".
This book blew my mind. Family is everything, and until you're looking at the fear in the face of someone you love who knows their time is up, you just can't know that feeling. There is nothing more painful than watching someone you love suffer. And if they asked you to take that suffering away, could you help?
Bobby has watched his mum suffer and deteriorate from even before her official diagnosis to now, in the bed-ridden stage of disease she has reached. He has been her main carer, infact, since the very beginning. So when his mum asks him to help her die, he is faced with an impossible decision after doing everything in his power to keep her here, day after day, for just that little bit longer. It's unimaginable.
"Do you have any idea what it's like to forget your own name, where you are, why you're where you are? Have you any idea what it's like to be trapped in your own forgetfulness? Seeing all the action unfold around you and you can't contribute? Wondering who the hell people are? Have you any idea what it's like to exist without living?"
Conaghan does an excellent job of capturing the many facets of living with a disease, but also living with someone who has a very debilitating long-term disease, which in this case manifests itself as MS. He does a particularly fantastic job of weaving this into the life of a teenager, and all of the pressures that coexist with that complete with "teacher pity" and counselling groups.
The opinions racing through my mind were unstoppable. I had so many, and each one disagreed with the last. I can't even imagine what it would feel like if it were real for me or my loved ones. When faced with such an unimaginably painful proposition, but one which might end the suffering of someone you love more than you can say, who you have watched deteriorate in front of your eyes, who you would do anything to make pain-free, could you do it? We would do anything for the ones we love right? But would you want to say goodbye sooner than you had to? Would you want to be the one responsible? Could you live with yourself afterwards? Are you responsible if their fate is sealed? If they've asked you to do it who are you to say no? The debate surrounding this area is just too huge to scale down into one book, but Conaghan has a pretty powerful whack at it!
Fully expect your brain to be constantly working overtime whilst you're reading this book, considering all the different elements, whilst your emotions feel like their punching out of your chest. This book isn't true for every disease, for every family, for every situation - it couldn't possibly truly reflect each situation in one. But it is sensitive, honest and raw; a book which makes me so conflicted, makes me question what I think or feel, or has me racing through the pages as if I know the characters? Yeah, that's a book worth reading.
ARC provided free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
This book blew my mind. Family is everything, and until you're looking at the fear in the face of someone you love who knows their time is up, you just can't know that feeling. There is nothing more painful than watching someone you love suffer. And if they asked you to take that suffering away, could you help?
Bobby has watched his mum suffer and deteriorate from even before her official diagnosis to now, in the bed-ridden stage of disease she has reached. He has been her main carer, infact, since the very beginning. So when his mum asks him to help her die, he is faced with an impossible decision after doing everything in his power to keep her here, day after day, for just that little bit longer. It's unimaginable.
"Do you have any idea what it's like to forget your own name, where you are, why you're where you are? Have you any idea what it's like to be trapped in your own forgetfulness? Seeing all the action unfold around you and you can't contribute? Wondering who the hell people are? Have you any idea what it's like to exist without living?"
Conaghan does an excellent job of capturing the many facets of living with a disease, but also living with someone who has a very debilitating long-term disease, which in this case manifests itself as MS. He does a particularly fantastic job of weaving this into the life of a teenager, and all of the pressures that coexist with that complete with "teacher pity" and counselling groups.
The opinions racing through my mind were unstoppable. I had so many, and each one disagreed with the last. I can't even imagine what it would feel like if it were real for me or my loved ones. When faced with such an unimaginably painful proposition, but one which might end the suffering of someone you love more than you can say, who you have watched deteriorate in front of your eyes, who you would do anything to make pain-free, could you do it? We would do anything for the ones we love right? But would you want to say goodbye sooner than you had to? Would you want to be the one responsible? Could you live with yourself afterwards? Are you responsible if their fate is sealed? If they've asked you to do it who are you to say no? The debate surrounding this area is just too huge to scale down into one book, but Conaghan has a pretty powerful whack at it!
Fully expect your brain to be constantly working overtime whilst you're reading this book, considering all the different elements, whilst your emotions feel like their punching out of your chest. This book isn't true for every disease, for every family, for every situation - it couldn't possibly truly reflect each situation in one. But it is sensitive, honest and raw; a book which makes me so conflicted, makes me question what I think or feel, or has me racing through the pages as if I know the characters? Yeah, that's a book worth reading.
ARC provided free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
August 12, 2020
Keep the tissues handy - a glimpse into the life of a teenage carer with a heavy burden of responsibility, and the love between parent and child, and siblings.
October 1, 2019
As those of you who’ve read my round up of the book festival would know I got to see and hear Brian Conaghan speak again this year. I also got a change to talk to him while getting his new book The M Word signed.
This ended up being my last event of the day as I was succumbing to exhaustion and had already cancelled the following event with my friend. I mentioned seeing him last year and having still not felt up to reading this book, as I was still struggling at this point. He then did the sweetest thing by giving me his email address and told me to read the book and then let him know what I thought. Honestly by that point I was so tired and in such pain I felt close to tears anyway but that gesture had me a bit tearful and star struck on the drive home.
So I read the book and here it is – my thoughts on it and how it felt to read another book with a main character dealing with MS.
I thought after Love From A to Z I would be better prepared for reading this but I hadn't counted on still struggling with recovery by this point.
As much as disability rep and own voices* are important, as a reader it can be so hard. I didn't feel the need for trigger warnings or anything. I mean, what trauma would it trigger? Especially since I was still struggling with the "trauma" of diagnosis** It's just hard to read certain things when other parts of your life are crumbling.
It won’t come as a surprise to anyone that I was absolutely sobbing through large chunks of the book especially when it came to flashbacks about how Bobby’s mum became ill; the starting symptoms of the MS – some of which were so reminiscent of the starting symptoms I was faced with a few years ago.
When I was discussing the ending with someone they asked why Bobby's mum had to die. It seemed to adhere to the ableist myth of better to be dead then disabled.
But the more I thought about the more I really understood the ending. It was never about his mum being better dead than disabled - it was about choices. It was about her right to choose how and when to end her life. Her death was inevitable due to the progression of her MS so this was about her decision, and about Bobby's decision to be there for her. Bobby, Danny and their mum got to be together, got to choose. As Danny himself said, when they were discussing the possibility of their mum going into hospital or hospice care:
I loved Bobby. He could've been a stereotype, of a 17 year old boy; of a young carer, but he was so much more than both of those ideas. He was complicated and layered and wonderful. I think my favourite thing about him is that he's a writer. I identified so much with his need and effort to explore his feelings and situation through poetry. (Having myself written some fairly bad poetry as a teen dealing with bullying)
It gave a layer you wouldn't expect and subverts the idea that boys don't like books or reading or even creativity.
I loved the other characters too – Belle, for being so unfailingly supportive and positive. Danny for being so insightful – he was underestimated by almost everyone, even Bobby at times – but he just seemed to understand what was going on with his mum more than everyone knew. I also loved Roddy and the rest of the Poztive guys. Honestly I disliked Lou from the start – what I supposed to like him? I’m not sure. I did have a feeling that there was something else going on with him but I had assumed he was pretending to be a young carer so it was an interesting turn that he had been through it all; that he’d been faced with the same dilemma as Bobby. I especially loved Bobby’s reaction to Lou’s complete detachment to and attempt to “help” Bobby’s mum. As Bobby said it wasn’t his job; he didn’t have the right to do anything regardless of whether he had been through the same battle with his mum. Although you could argue that the reason he had such a detachment to it, and didn’t really understand Bobby’s reaction was that it hadn’t been his mum’s choice, her request – it had all been for him.
I also really liked how Bobby’s sexuality was dealt with. It wasn’t announced at the introduction of Bobby: 17 years old, male, a young carer and gay. Instead it was introduced slowly, when it made sense, when it mattered. I liked too, that Bobby was facing relationship and romantic issues – just like most other teenagers at the same time as dealing with issues with his mum. It was never one or the other so in this way he was built into such an interesting multi-dimensional character.
Hilariously (or maybe just darkly funny – I have a hard time deciding which) I realised a few days ago that the bookmark I'd been using while reading this book was one I had received along with a book called Overcoming MS (which has since been relegated to the recycling bin as, call me strange but I have a thing against burning books, even awful and dangerous ones.)
Ultimately though, I was really glad I finally did read this book, it was really difficult but I do think it’s important to read difficult and hard books sometimes (obviously as long as they don’t damage your mental health). So now I’ve added The M Word to be tbr list and I’m off to figure out how to email a famous author to talk to him about his book. (Cue a bit of panic and flailing.)
*Although to be clear, neither Love from A to Z or The Weight of a Thousand Feathers is really own voices since neither S.K. Ali nor Brian Conaghan have MS themselves, although both books were written after extensive research and both have family experience of it.
**I have had a lot of discussions about the idea of triggering and trigger warnings with my mum who is a practicing Art Psychotherapist. I won’t go into all today but let’s just say I have mixed feelings about the current ideas of and conversation around the use of words like triggering and trauma.
This ended up being my last event of the day as I was succumbing to exhaustion and had already cancelled the following event with my friend. I mentioned seeing him last year and having still not felt up to reading this book, as I was still struggling at this point. He then did the sweetest thing by giving me his email address and told me to read the book and then let him know what I thought. Honestly by that point I was so tired and in such pain I felt close to tears anyway but that gesture had me a bit tearful and star struck on the drive home.
So I read the book and here it is – my thoughts on it and how it felt to read another book with a main character dealing with MS.
I thought after Love From A to Z I would be better prepared for reading this but I hadn't counted on still struggling with recovery by this point.
As much as disability rep and own voices* are important, as a reader it can be so hard. I didn't feel the need for trigger warnings or anything. I mean, what trauma would it trigger? Especially since I was still struggling with the "trauma" of diagnosis** It's just hard to read certain things when other parts of your life are crumbling.
It won’t come as a surprise to anyone that I was absolutely sobbing through large chunks of the book especially when it came to flashbacks about how Bobby’s mum became ill; the starting symptoms of the MS – some of which were so reminiscent of the starting symptoms I was faced with a few years ago.
When I was discussing the ending with someone they asked why Bobby's mum had to die. It seemed to adhere to the ableist myth of better to be dead then disabled.
But the more I thought about the more I really understood the ending. It was never about his mum being better dead than disabled - it was about choices. It was about her right to choose how and when to end her life. Her death was inevitable due to the progression of her MS so this was about her decision, and about Bobby's decision to be there for her. Bobby, Danny and their mum got to be together, got to choose. As Danny himself said, when they were discussing the possibility of their mum going into hospital or hospice care:
But Mum shouldn’t be in a hospital with tubes and strangers – she should be with us. We can’t put her with strangers.
I loved Bobby. He could've been a stereotype, of a 17 year old boy; of a young carer, but he was so much more than both of those ideas. He was complicated and layered and wonderful. I think my favourite thing about him is that he's a writer. I identified so much with his need and effort to explore his feelings and situation through poetry. (Having myself written some fairly bad poetry as a teen dealing with bullying)
It gave a layer you wouldn't expect and subverts the idea that boys don't like books or reading or even creativity.
I loved the other characters too – Belle, for being so unfailingly supportive and positive. Danny for being so insightful – he was underestimated by almost everyone, even Bobby at times – but he just seemed to understand what was going on with his mum more than everyone knew. I also loved Roddy and the rest of the Poztive guys. Honestly I disliked Lou from the start – what I supposed to like him? I’m not sure. I did have a feeling that there was something else going on with him but I had assumed he was pretending to be a young carer so it was an interesting turn that he had been through it all; that he’d been faced with the same dilemma as Bobby. I especially loved Bobby’s reaction to Lou’s complete detachment to and attempt to “help” Bobby’s mum. As Bobby said it wasn’t his job; he didn’t have the right to do anything regardless of whether he had been through the same battle with his mum. Although you could argue that the reason he had such a detachment to it, and didn’t really understand Bobby’s reaction was that it hadn’t been his mum’s choice, her request – it had all been for him.
I also really liked how Bobby’s sexuality was dealt with. It wasn’t announced at the introduction of Bobby: 17 years old, male, a young carer and gay. Instead it was introduced slowly, when it made sense, when it mattered. I liked too, that Bobby was facing relationship and romantic issues – just like most other teenagers at the same time as dealing with issues with his mum. It was never one or the other so in this way he was built into such an interesting multi-dimensional character.
Hilariously (or maybe just darkly funny – I have a hard time deciding which) I realised a few days ago that the bookmark I'd been using while reading this book was one I had received along with a book called Overcoming MS (which has since been relegated to the recycling bin as, call me strange but I have a thing against burning books, even awful and dangerous ones.)
Ultimately though, I was really glad I finally did read this book, it was really difficult but I do think it’s important to read difficult and hard books sometimes (obviously as long as they don’t damage your mental health). So now I’ve added The M Word to be tbr list and I’m off to figure out how to email a famous author to talk to him about his book. (Cue a bit of panic and flailing.)
*Although to be clear, neither Love from A to Z or The Weight of a Thousand Feathers is really own voices since neither S.K. Ali nor Brian Conaghan have MS themselves, although both books were written after extensive research and both have family experience of it.
**I have had a lot of discussions about the idea of triggering and trigger warnings with my mum who is a practicing Art Psychotherapist. I won’t go into all today but let’s just say I have mixed feelings about the current ideas of and conversation around the use of words like triggering and trauma.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 26, 2020
This book is highly emotive. A quick read, it has you on an emotional rollercoaster. It deals with the big question of euthanasia and why others might want to die and why some would want to help loved ones die.
This is one of those books that stay with you and colours the way you might think about such big issues.
The story follows two boys and their ill mother who asked them to mercy kill her. It brings to the fore whether people should be allowed to 'die with dignity' and with the current law as it is, what would happen to those relatives who would help them.
My 11 year old daughter is currently reading and I find it's too big a topic to have her read and leave it there, so we are following up with documentaries, looking at the pros and cons and why it is such a highly emotive issue/problem for us all. We are also including the religious aspect.
A highly, highly emotional read. One that I've loved.
This is one of those books that stay with you and colours the way you might think about such big issues.
The story follows two boys and their ill mother who asked them to mercy kill her. It brings to the fore whether people should be allowed to 'die with dignity' and with the current law as it is, what would happen to those relatives who would help them.
My 11 year old daughter is currently reading and I find it's too big a topic to have her read and leave it there, so we are following up with documentaries, looking at the pros and cons and why it is such a highly emotive issue/problem for us all. We are also including the religious aspect.
A highly, highly emotional read. One that I've loved.
July 19, 2019
A book about life-threatening sickness for when I'm down with a common sickness? Yep that's me
September 29, 2024
Stop this is so sad i cant but still k Can like its amazingly written but sososo sad holy cow
October 10, 2018
So, so good, absolutely loved it. Extremely sad but such a good story. Highly recommend.
September 19, 2022
The part I liked most about this book was the dilemma. I liked this because it's a really difficult decision and it makes you want to read more to see what the character Bobby Seed chooses.
When thinking about what I didn't like, I struggled. I struggled because I liked it a lot. For example I liked the curiosity about Lou's mother, I liked the emotional rollercoaster that Bobby Seed goes on, and lastly I liked when Lou told Bobby Seed everything he did and how he euthanized his mother and wanted to help Bobby Seed euthanize his mother too.
This book reminds me a bit of ‘One’. This book is reminded by me because it is the life of a teenage life, also because Bobby’s mother has an illness called MS it is short for Multiple Sclerosis. The book One has two main characters called Tippi Grace. They are conjoined twins. The reason why I find these similar is because they both have problems. Both of them are about teenage life. And both have death in it.
The character I liked best is Lou because he is very mysterious about his mother and very confident. I like how one day he splusters out all of his things that have actually happened and how he euthanized his mother. Also what I like about Lou is that he seems cool in how his accent is and how he rides a vespa and smokes. He also kind of seems pressurising he convinces Bobby into doing this to his mother and he convinces Bobby to have some puffs.
When thinking about who I like least it is difficult to imagine. I think the one i like least is Bel simply because we know the least about her but then again i like her because of how good a friend she is to Bobby and how she forgives him and sometimes gives him a pep talk.
The person that I would cast as Bobby Seed is Jacon Tremblay who plays August in the book and film Wonder. I thought Jacob Tremblay would be good as Bobby Seed because he is a teen and I feel he would play well because in wonder August is a bit shy and always has his head down. I don't think Bobby is not that bad but when I read it I have a feeling he can be shy at some points. Also in Wonder when u first meet August he is really shy but when you get to know him he is very energising and always excited. He is happy and is fun. So he is not shy all the time.
The quote I like in the book is on page 342 it says ‘ mum soared away last night roared into this place full of melody while we fell...to...pieces.’ I feel this is pretty powerful to me because it tell us she died and she was happy ‘mum soared away last night’ and it also tells us how sad the two boys Bobby and Daniel Seed where ‘ while we fell to pieces’ the epilepsis has a big effect on it because it adds to how sad they are.
I would definitely read another book from this author because i think this author Brian Conaghan is very talented and I enjoy his work. I also like how it's the life of a teenager and it has so many obstacles to come over and descriptions and its very page turning.
It kinda was like real life except in the book. I felt like it was a drama which is very page turning to me and how there are dilemmas. I feel very excited when reading this because I want to know what happened and I like the fact it's sad and shocking at the same time.
I thought the length of the book was just fine to me. It might not be for other people. It also depends on how i feel because if i don't really like it then i would want to finish it as quick as possible so i would want it to be shorter but if i really enjoy it then i would love to read more. Not that I didn't like it. I did really enjoy it. The length was just fine for me.
The question I would like to ask the author is, is Bobby Seed meant to be shy or confident or normal because it feels to me he is shy but not all the time when you get to know him he seems really fun.
When thinking about what I didn't like, I struggled. I struggled because I liked it a lot. For example I liked the curiosity about Lou's mother, I liked the emotional rollercoaster that Bobby Seed goes on, and lastly I liked when Lou told Bobby Seed everything he did and how he euthanized his mother and wanted to help Bobby Seed euthanize his mother too.
This book reminds me a bit of ‘One’. This book is reminded by me because it is the life of a teenage life, also because Bobby’s mother has an illness called MS it is short for Multiple Sclerosis. The book One has two main characters called Tippi Grace. They are conjoined twins. The reason why I find these similar is because they both have problems. Both of them are about teenage life. And both have death in it.
The character I liked best is Lou because he is very mysterious about his mother and very confident. I like how one day he splusters out all of his things that have actually happened and how he euthanized his mother. Also what I like about Lou is that he seems cool in how his accent is and how he rides a vespa and smokes. He also kind of seems pressurising he convinces Bobby into doing this to his mother and he convinces Bobby to have some puffs.
When thinking about who I like least it is difficult to imagine. I think the one i like least is Bel simply because we know the least about her but then again i like her because of how good a friend she is to Bobby and how she forgives him and sometimes gives him a pep talk.
The person that I would cast as Bobby Seed is Jacon Tremblay who plays August in the book and film Wonder. I thought Jacob Tremblay would be good as Bobby Seed because he is a teen and I feel he would play well because in wonder August is a bit shy and always has his head down. I don't think Bobby is not that bad but when I read it I have a feeling he can be shy at some points. Also in Wonder when u first meet August he is really shy but when you get to know him he is very energising and always excited. He is happy and is fun. So he is not shy all the time.
The quote I like in the book is on page 342 it says ‘ mum soared away last night roared into this place full of melody while we fell...to...pieces.’ I feel this is pretty powerful to me because it tell us she died and she was happy ‘mum soared away last night’ and it also tells us how sad the two boys Bobby and Daniel Seed where ‘ while we fell to pieces’ the epilepsis has a big effect on it because it adds to how sad they are.
I would definitely read another book from this author because i think this author Brian Conaghan is very talented and I enjoy his work. I also like how it's the life of a teenager and it has so many obstacles to come over and descriptions and its very page turning.
It kinda was like real life except in the book. I felt like it was a drama which is very page turning to me and how there are dilemmas. I feel very excited when reading this because I want to know what happened and I like the fact it's sad and shocking at the same time.
I thought the length of the book was just fine to me. It might not be for other people. It also depends on how i feel because if i don't really like it then i would want to finish it as quick as possible so i would want it to be shorter but if i really enjoy it then i would love to read more. Not that I didn't like it. I did really enjoy it. The length was just fine for me.
The question I would like to ask the author is, is Bobby Seed meant to be shy or confident or normal because it feels to me he is shy but not all the time when you get to know him he seems really fun.
February 16, 2019
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for providing me with an eARC of this title for review. All opinions are my own.
Actual rating: 4.5/5 stars
This was close to a 5 star book, but I couldn't get over one of the interactions between two main characters. I won't spoil it for those who haven't read it, but there was a pretty significant interaction between two major characters, that should serve as some sort of turning point, and it just fizzles. There isn't any real resolution to it and no explanation as to why it happened that way. The reader ends up feeling a bit disjointed regarding one of the characters, and I think it could have been more fleshed out.
Besides that, this was everything I wanted it to be. The main character is funny and real and relatable. You are rooting for him and you are with him as he struggles to make some of the hardest decisions that anyone could ever have to make. He is flawed, but you are willing to overlook it because he is also so damn lovable.
Bobby Seed is a carer. He is 17 and runs his house. His mother is suffering from MS, which means he is in charge of cleaning, cooking, caring, and making sure his younger brother gets to school, gets his homework done, and doesn't spend too much time on the internet. Bobby knows that his mother isn't going to get better. She knows she isn't going to get better. And it is becoming more and more obvious that her condition is worsening. As his mother is confined to her bedroom, Bobby's only solace comes from his new support group: Poztive, a group of young carers. There he meets Lou and thinks he might have found a friend and someone who can understand the burden he is under. So when his mother asks him the unthinkable, he thinks he might have finally found someone who will understand what he is going through.
Highly recommend. Appropriate for grades 9 and up. There is some language, some drug use, and issues of death and mortality.
Actual rating: 4.5/5 stars
This was close to a 5 star book, but I couldn't get over one of the interactions between two main characters. I won't spoil it for those who haven't read it, but there was a pretty significant interaction between two major characters, that should serve as some sort of turning point, and it just fizzles. There isn't any real resolution to it and no explanation as to why it happened that way. The reader ends up feeling a bit disjointed regarding one of the characters, and I think it could have been more fleshed out.
Besides that, this was everything I wanted it to be. The main character is funny and real and relatable. You are rooting for him and you are with him as he struggles to make some of the hardest decisions that anyone could ever have to make. He is flawed, but you are willing to overlook it because he is also so damn lovable.
Bobby Seed is a carer. He is 17 and runs his house. His mother is suffering from MS, which means he is in charge of cleaning, cooking, caring, and making sure his younger brother gets to school, gets his homework done, and doesn't spend too much time on the internet. Bobby knows that his mother isn't going to get better. She knows she isn't going to get better. And it is becoming more and more obvious that her condition is worsening. As his mother is confined to her bedroom, Bobby's only solace comes from his new support group: Poztive, a group of young carers. There he meets Lou and thinks he might have found a friend and someone who can understand the burden he is under. So when his mother asks him the unthinkable, he thinks he might have finally found someone who will understand what he is going through.
Highly recommend. Appropriate for grades 9 and up. There is some language, some drug use, and issues of death and mortality.
July 23, 2019
I feel like this book had so much potential but it didn't live up to my expectations at all. This could be a really good hard-hitting contemporary but alas, I kept wanting to put it down because nothing was really grabbing my attention. I felt very disconnected from the characters and I didn't really care for them.
The writing style was also not my cup of tea. Maybe because of the use of a lot of Scottish slang, it kept taking me out of the reading experience. One of the writing format in this book was text message. I dislike that part very much because I had difficulty trying to understand what this person's text message was trying to say because of the short-form and slang.
I was hoping to learn more about multiple sclerosis, the condition the mother of the main character was suffering from, and more on how Bobby was like as a young carer. However, a lot of those things felt very surface level. Which bores me a little. Maybe it's because I'm in the medical-line, I felt the need to know about a lot of these things.
The romance also felt kind of unnecessary, if we can even call it one because I felt kind of awkward reading those. The love interest was meh and really weird at times, if I'm being perfectly honest.
I also did not like the route the author took to end the story as well as the way some things were handled in this book. I also felt like there are a lot of unanswered questions that could be answered if only the author delved deeper into the plot instead of focusing more on other unnecessary things.
Stories like this is very important because people need to know what it's like to be a young carer but I was left confused and disappointed by the end of it.
The writing style was also not my cup of tea. Maybe because of the use of a lot of Scottish slang, it kept taking me out of the reading experience. One of the writing format in this book was text message. I dislike that part very much because I had difficulty trying to understand what this person's text message was trying to say because of the short-form and slang.
I was hoping to learn more about multiple sclerosis, the condition the mother of the main character was suffering from, and more on how Bobby was like as a young carer. However, a lot of those things felt very surface level. Which bores me a little. Maybe it's because I'm in the medical-line, I felt the need to know about a lot of these things.
The romance also felt kind of unnecessary, if we can even call it one because I felt kind of awkward reading those. The love interest was meh and really weird at times, if I'm being perfectly honest.
I also did not like the route the author took to end the story as well as the way some things were handled in this book. I also felt like there are a lot of unanswered questions that could be answered if only the author delved deeper into the plot instead of focusing more on other unnecessary things.
Stories like this is very important because people need to know what it's like to be a young carer but I was left confused and disappointed by the end of it.
September 23, 2018
We have to warn you that this is perhaps one of the saddest books in YA that we have ever read. Having said that, we loved it! Bobby Seed is a wonderful, funny, nuanced character, but a boy who also has so much to bear. Not only does he have to cope with the normal trials of teen life and relationships, but he is the carer for his mum whose health is rapidly deteriorating and his younger brother. The great strength of this novel is the representation of heartwarming relationships. Bobby and his mother use black humour as their coping mechanism and the dialogue between the two is at times hilarious. Even in her times of greatest pain and suffering his mum does not lose her wit or sarcasm. The love within this family just shines from the page. Bobby has great support from his best friend Bel and his brother Danny but still, most of the burden and guilt rests with Bobby. When Bobby starts attending weekly meetings for young carers, gatherings full of awkward “getting to know you and stepping out of your comfort zone” activities, he sees that there are others who have similar issues at home to deal with and this gives him an outlet to explore his emotions. It also provides a place for him to have fun, relax and be a teen and navigate some awakening relationships of his own. This novel raises deeply complex moral questions about the sanctity of life, quality of life and to what extent we will go to help and protect our loved ones. There are no easy answers in this novel and you will be thinking about this book for a long time after reading it.
June 18, 2019
'The Weight of a Thousand Feathers' is Brian Conaghan's fourth novel and winner of the 2018 Irish book award for Teen and YA Book of the Year. It's the story of teenager Bobby Seed, who is your average 16 year old, apart from the fact that he is a carer to his Mum and also looks after his younger brother Danny. Bobby's mother has MS and is dependant on him for her care. He has to cook, clean and basically do everything for her.
I haven't read any YA books before that are told from the point of view of a family caregiver and especially not one who also happens to be just a teenager. As well as caring for his Mum, Bobby is also trying to navigate his own issues at school, shield his younger brother and deal with relationship dramas and questions about his own sexuality. Bobby was an extremely strong voice in the story who ends up confronted with an impossible dilemma. His train of thought is full of indecision, guilt and angst and I really felt for him.
During the story, Bobby meets Lou at a young carers support group. He is attracted to him and they share their emotions and thoughts with each other but I wasn't actually very keen on Lou. I found it hard to feel the same sympathy toward him as I felt for Bobby.
The book explores the ethical dilemma of assisted suicide or euthanasia which makes it an incredibly hard-hitting read. It is such a complex and difficult question: would you help ease the suffering of a loved one if they were dying or in pair or with no quality of life? It is an extremely controversial and emotive issue and one which creates a lot of debate. I thought that Brian Conaghan presented the situation with care and a sensitive touch. I found it so heart-breaking and extremely difficult to read at times. My heart went out to Bobby and his brother.
This is a story that is both thought-provoking, as well as incredibly sad and moving. Be prepared to read with a big box of tissues by your side.
I haven't read any YA books before that are told from the point of view of a family caregiver and especially not one who also happens to be just a teenager. As well as caring for his Mum, Bobby is also trying to navigate his own issues at school, shield his younger brother and deal with relationship dramas and questions about his own sexuality. Bobby was an extremely strong voice in the story who ends up confronted with an impossible dilemma. His train of thought is full of indecision, guilt and angst and I really felt for him.
During the story, Bobby meets Lou at a young carers support group. He is attracted to him and they share their emotions and thoughts with each other but I wasn't actually very keen on Lou. I found it hard to feel the same sympathy toward him as I felt for Bobby.
The book explores the ethical dilemma of assisted suicide or euthanasia which makes it an incredibly hard-hitting read. It is such a complex and difficult question: would you help ease the suffering of a loved one if they were dying or in pair or with no quality of life? It is an extremely controversial and emotive issue and one which creates a lot of debate. I thought that Brian Conaghan presented the situation with care and a sensitive touch. I found it so heart-breaking and extremely difficult to read at times. My heart went out to Bobby and his brother.
This is a story that is both thought-provoking, as well as incredibly sad and moving. Be prepared to read with a big box of tissues by your side.
March 3, 2019
I'm so happy rn but unfortunately, the book I am talking 'bout in this post is far from anything happy.
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The story is something you don't come across usually.
With a 17 y/o boy, Bobby Seed as the protagonist, the novel began with the couldn't-care-less vibes of a teenager but gradually transformed into something unimaginable to the common mass.
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Bobby Seed isn't your average teenager. He is a 'carer'. He has to look after his mother who suffers from MS (Multiple Sclerosis - a disease where your own immune system begins eating at the protective covering of your nervous system). Not only that, he also has a younger brother who is mentally less developed for his age.
Relief from his hectic life , comes his way, when his school counselor, taking an initiative by herself,finds him a group of other such young 'carers', so that, for a change he'd be with people who could empathize and not just pity him.
There, he meets another 17y/o guy, Lou, who's the definition of a 'cool dude', but, somehow he's not like the others. There's something secretive bout him.
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With time, Bobby finds himself getting attracted to Lou (I liked this part of the story-the central characters representing the LGBTQ+ community).
Meanwhile, his mother's health deteriorates and one day she asks a favour of him, which shocks him to death. At around the same time, he finally learns Lou's secrets and that is another blow.
Befuddled with dilemmas, stuck between rights and wrongs, Bobby Seed is just another confused teenager then - only his confusions are graver than most others.
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The story - questioning,heartbreaking, uncomfortable, bold, spine chilling yet tender-will keep you turning the pages till you reach the end.
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Another fact: The sentence structures are a bit different from what we see usually.
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I rate the book 4/5 ⭐
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#1000feathers #bookstagram
October 1, 2018
I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
High 3.5 stars. I’m a bit torn because the first half of this book had me hooked. But the last half kind of dropped the ball a bit for me and I no longer felt a connection to the characters.
I mean I never liked Lou but I don’t think we were supposed too. PUNCH HIM. DO IT.
I kinda wanted more Bel. Can we have a book about her now please? <3
Bobby.. oh Bobby.. what a confused, and glorious boy you could have been. The first half of the book I was riding those waves with you!
I’ve never actually read a book that touched on the big debate of voluntary euthanasia or assisted suicide. Obviously this is a whole can of worms which I will not open in a book review. Essentially this book is about 17 year old Bobby who is a caretaker for his mother (who is dying from MS and no longer wants to be in constant pain and suffering - completely reasonable), while also trying to navigate his teenage life and sexuality.
It’s such a realistic situation but I just wanted the ending to be a little.. more than it was. It felt rushed when I don’t think it should have been.
But hey, I really like the fact that this book was written in the first place. It was interesting and I would definitely look at picking up something similar again.
But more importantly I would like a book about Bel. Did I mention that already?
High 3.5 stars. I’m a bit torn because the first half of this book had me hooked. But the last half kind of dropped the ball a bit for me and I no longer felt a connection to the characters.
I mean I never liked Lou but I don’t think we were supposed too. PUNCH HIM. DO IT.
I kinda wanted more Bel. Can we have a book about her now please? <3
Bobby.. oh Bobby.. what a confused, and glorious boy you could have been. The first half of the book I was riding those waves with you!
I’ve never actually read a book that touched on the big debate of voluntary euthanasia or assisted suicide. Obviously this is a whole can of worms which I will not open in a book review. Essentially this book is about 17 year old Bobby who is a caretaker for his mother (who is dying from MS and no longer wants to be in constant pain and suffering - completely reasonable), while also trying to navigate his teenage life and sexuality.
It’s such a realistic situation but I just wanted the ending to be a little.. more than it was. It felt rushed when I don’t think it should have been.
But hey, I really like the fact that this book was written in the first place. It was interesting and I would definitely look at picking up something similar again.
But more importantly I would like a book about Bel. Did I mention that already?
June 9, 2018
4.5 Stars
This book made me ugly cry.
And when I say ugly cry, I mean cry my absolute heart out. I think this book tops the saddest-books list. I knew it was gonna rip my heart out, but I didn’t realise it was gonna hurt this much.
I guess I sort of thought it was gonna be mildly sad, like the mild Peri-Peri sauce you get at Nandos that is supposedly quite hot but just makes your throat feel a little tingly. And to be totally honest, I didn’t really pay attention to what this book was about before I read it. That was a mistake...but also not. Because I don’t think I would have read it otherwise.
WHY DIDNT I THINK THIS WOULD BE SO SAD.
I mean, the author did pair up with Sarah Crossan last year, and we all know her books are total ugly-cry books. When I read her book, ‘Moonrise’ earlier this year, I thought THAT was one of the saddest books, but this trumps that one ten-fold.
I want to explain what this book is about, but I think the essence of what made this such a great book was not knowing.
So, most importantly this book is gonna hurt. I feel like I need to give a trigger warning, but I also know it’s a spoiler, so I’m feeling like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place here. My recommendation is that you approach this book with caution, and if you are struggling with depression or grief/loss, that maybe you shouldn’t touch this one. It is hard-hitting. It’s not a stormtrooper, it ain’t gonna miss.
This book made me ugly cry.
And when I say ugly cry, I mean cry my absolute heart out. I think this book tops the saddest-books list. I knew it was gonna rip my heart out, but I didn’t realise it was gonna hurt this much.
I guess I sort of thought it was gonna be mildly sad, like the mild Peri-Peri sauce you get at Nandos that is supposedly quite hot but just makes your throat feel a little tingly. And to be totally honest, I didn’t really pay attention to what this book was about before I read it. That was a mistake...but also not. Because I don’t think I would have read it otherwise.
WHY DIDNT I THINK THIS WOULD BE SO SAD.
I mean, the author did pair up with Sarah Crossan last year, and we all know her books are total ugly-cry books. When I read her book, ‘Moonrise’ earlier this year, I thought THAT was one of the saddest books, but this trumps that one ten-fold.
I want to explain what this book is about, but I think the essence of what made this such a great book was not knowing.
So, most importantly this book is gonna hurt. I feel like I need to give a trigger warning, but I also know it’s a spoiler, so I’m feeling like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place here. My recommendation is that you approach this book with caution, and if you are struggling with depression or grief/loss, that maybe you shouldn’t touch this one. It is hard-hitting. It’s not a stormtrooper, it ain’t gonna miss.
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