Confident Humility: Becoming Your Full Self without Becoming Full of Yourself

by Dan Kent

Almost all self-help books emerge from one of two flawed views of the self, and these mutually exclusive ditches are destructive. The Ditch of Smallness says that people are fundamentally bad and that humanity's greatest spiritual threat is pride. The Ditch of Bigness says the exact people are fundamentally good, and shame is our greatest danger. Dan Kent presents a third view, a road between the ditches. He shows how the humility Jesus revealed offers the most accurate and freeing view of the self. Whereas shame and arrogance are dysfunction steroids (making our depression darker, our anxiety tighter, our addictions stickier, and so forth), humility, as Jesus teaches it, counteracts shame and pride, thereby subverting two major psychological forces that thwart us.

Once we embrace this new way of seeing ourselves--how Jesus sees us--we begin to relate to ourselves, to others, and to the world around us in a way that allows us to overcome a whole host of vices and self-sabotaging behaviors. Furthermore, whereas the ditches both lead to powerlessness and passivity, humility as Jesus teaches it is empowering, fosters proactivity, and serves as a scaffold for true confidence.

217 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 11, 2019

Reviews

[JC · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great new way to look at humility. It’s a topic I’ve glossed over many times without much afterthought. Dan does a great job at breaking down the two preconceived opposites of humility, pride and shame. Each makes you think the other is wrong and as he notes”whenever you find two contraries that are each right about the other being wrong, it can only mean one thing. They’re both wrong.” This book is worth the time, don’t sleep on it, as the kids say.

[H.R. Hutzel · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't say enough good things about this book. It's one of those books I now want to re-read at least once a year. In this book, Kent reveals the two typical pitfalls of thinking (he calls them ditches) we fall into regarding the concept of humility. But as you turn the pages, you realize this book is about so much more than living a humble life. Kent masterfully weaves together truths about identity, mindset, self-worth, valuing others, and more that lead to a surprising yet inevitable definition of what it means to be confidently humble. If you feel "stuck" in patterns of shame, regret, pride, self-loathing, or self-love, you'll be pleased to know there is another way. Through this book, Kent shows us that way—the way of Confident Humility.

[Joel · Rating 5 out of 5]

An insightful take on humility, encouraging us to escape the mistakes of seeing ourselves as more or less than we are. Instead, humility is about finding our security in being infinitely loved by God, allowing us to recognize and address our shortcomings without threatening our security. I highly recommend this book as a corrective to help you better perceive your full self.

[Brandon Andress · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant book by the confident, yet humble, Dan Kent. It reads like Spirit of the Disciplines by Willard or Celebration of Disciplines by Foster but more jocular and personable. In a culture that is starving for humility, this book is timely and essential.

[Peter Orluck · Rating 5 out of 5]

Something new that was

Loved this book. Equality and freedom, and more. Really really helpful. The security we all have in the immeasurable love of God and the empowered life we can live because of it is a great insight. Thanks Dan!!

[Julia Landes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really helpful book! Dan has great analogies to help bring home points, and this book really changed my mind on what Jesus's vision for humility is! Would highly recommend!

[Laura Tiessen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well written, readable, humorous, and wise, this book is worth reading and rereading.

[Lila Diller · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can tell that the author put a lot of effort into it; it shows. It flows well and logically with many concrete examples and stories to help me understand these somewhat abstract concepts in real-world life. As a visual learner, I especially appreciated the sketches, diagrams, and charts! It was well-edited, too, though using "Jesus's" as possessive just drives this grammar geek batty!

This book has helped me tremendously. I've recommended it to several people already, and my husband and I are reading it together now.

I also appreciate the entire last chapter being set aside for practical uses of this concept of humility as different from what we normally think of. Since coming to believe in free will (as opposed to determinism), I'd been wondering how free will can be practically applied to everyday situations and doctrines. Growing up in a deterministic church culture, it was a worldview set of glasses that colored every doctrine and practice. Now I'm trying to retrain my brain to see reality through the lens of free will. I believe this book is one such helpful practical way to pursue confidence and action without getting stuck in the apathy and passivity of determinism. ♥️

I highly recommend this book to everyone!

[Jonathan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Author Dan Kent has something vitally important to share with us in his latest outing. As a professed follower of Christ, Kent takes us through a Christ-centered summation of what humility is and isn't. We've missed the mark on the majority of Jesus' teachings on what it means to be humble. The book is an easily readable, yet not overly simplistic (no false platitudes here!), guidebook on living into a more cruciform way of life. I especially appreciated Chapters 6 and 8 as a DIY rundown of what this living a life of active humility looks like. I believe that this book, but Chapter 8 specifically, would be a boon to the recovery community. I am grateful for folks like Dan who think broadly and passionately about a subject as important as this. No doubt this book will benefit a great many who take the time to read and utilize what is being said in it's pages.

[Chuck Ammons · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phenomenal! Lots of really helpful wisdom in these pages, and the pace and style of writing makes it a joy!

[Brandon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very, very good.