Odette has been a prisoner of some witches for quite a while, but she's not happy to be freed only to end up in the clutches of the dragon wizard who killed her whole family and is now claiming that marriage to her is the only way he can stay in power. Enter Drekken, the drunken bard-wannabe elf who has approximately the most convenient timing of any fantasy character I've ever read about. He attempts a daring rescue only to learn that he has to marry an elf lady so he can save his people from losing their magic, which would make their giant pyramid houses fall out of the sky, at which point, they'd have to deal with the island's other inhabitants (which is bad, to be clear). Together, the two try to find a way to free Odette and figure out who Drekken will marry, supported by the wit and magic of Drekken's athletic younger sister.
If you're Tamara Grantham and you're reading this, I'm sorry in advance. The concept is a lot of fun. But that's about where my satisfaction with this book ended. The characters are inconsistent and hard to empathize with, and neither point of view character has a unique enough voice that I could tell when the POV switched. The theme seems to be something along the lines of "don't resist attraction; instead, it'll probably save you in the end if you keep trying long enough and don't die." There's also an "alcohol bad" theme that ... Okay, can I just ask, where did Drekken get the ale that persistently "burns his throat" and causes him to relax in less than 5 minutes? Because, listen, the average 12% swill that usually is marketed as ale just isn't doing that. I mean, where can I get this stuff? But anyway. Odette seems to have some sort of "who could ever love me" tragic swoony arc that goes absolutely nowhere, which isn't doing much to support the themes of this book either. And oh my goodness, the plot structure? Where are we going with this? I think I could have swallowed it if this book weren't riddled with insanely convenient coincidences every other scene. So, if this book doesn't have interesting characters, a thought-provoking theme, a reasonable plot, comprehensible scenes, or unique voice, surely it at least isn't completely awash with continuity errors and terrible fact-checking ... right? I'm told I can blame the typos on the cat. Which. Fair. But please, tell that cat not to mix up Drekken and Raj's names when they're in the same scene together: I was confused.
Overall, this is not the worst book I've ever read. It's not even the worst professionally published book I've ever read. But, uh, that's still not a compliment.