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Validate Me
From the bestselling author of She Must Be Mad¸ comes the second book of poetry and prose from Charly Cox. Honest, raw, insightful and magically interweaving the everyday with the abstract, Charly’s writing is exquisite. She is a leading light of the new cohort of young women who are changing the landscape for poetry in the 21st century.
Part-comedy, part caricature, but mostly harrowing truth, Charly Cox’s second collection, Validate Me explores the havoc that the digital hemisphere is playing on our relationships, concentration span and mental health. Written entirely on her phone, this is a look at how a life lived online is both liberating and screwing us all up, through the gaze of one woman on the cusp of absolute digital burnout. Funny, heartbreaking and achingly relatable, Charly’s writing has the power to make us all feel less alone.
Part-comedy, part caricature, but mostly harrowing truth, Charly Cox’s second collection, Validate Me explores the havoc that the digital hemisphere is playing on our relationships, concentration span and mental health. Written entirely on her phone, this is a look at how a life lived online is both liberating and screwing us all up, through the gaze of one woman on the cusp of absolute digital burnout. Funny, heartbreaking and achingly relatable, Charly’s writing has the power to make us all feel less alone.
160 pages, Paperback
First published October 3, 2019
36 people are currently reading
2151 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 81 reviews
October 8, 2019
I laughed and I cried and I felt great relief that it isn’t just me.
February 5, 2022
I think it would be better for me if i did not relate to most of the poems... but i did sooo
May 6, 2020
To be read aloud in bed; at times like a girl power mantra, at others through the sobbing about your seeming inability to attract non-toxic romantic relationships. A super great reminder that you’re not alone in all of the online bullshit, too.
Love Charly, loved this.
Love Charly, loved this.
January 12, 2020
3,5 stars. There were some gems in here. Interestingly I enjoyed the short prose more than the poetry.
October 12, 2022
An interesting read mostly because it’s disappointingly relatable. There’s something about seeing these kind of thoughts written down that make you realise how silly they are which is useful though. The poems were lost on me at times.
Read
November 17, 2024This was definitely interesting, eye-opening, felt like it was totally calling me out sometimes and incredibly honest and deep.
No rating from me because I’m a poetry newbie so don’t feel comfortable rating it. Also mainly because it feels so personal to the author, almost like a memoir, and who am I to judge someone’s most inner/dark thoughts and feelings!?
A few lines that really spoke to me:
Behind being angry at others who are better
Behind being comfortable with shrugging off whatever'
Behind losing yourself to a constant anxiety
Is a purpose that's screaming for you to wake up
And see that behind every fear is a wish
And behind every wish is a dream
And behind all the things that you feel are obstacles
Is simply you putting an excuse in-between.
_________________
When you wake your eyes are drawn to the screen
And I imagine all the people before us
Who didn't have these things
Who'd have lazed and lounged and gazed
Touched and smiled and yawned and snaked.
____________________
This collection was also really witty at times too, and it was great to get the more lighthearted sections amongst the pretty sad tone of the whole book.
If you’re interested in poetry this is a great one to dive into, it’s incredibly relatable for our generation.
No rating from me because I’m a poetry newbie so don’t feel comfortable rating it. Also mainly because it feels so personal to the author, almost like a memoir, and who am I to judge someone’s most inner/dark thoughts and feelings!?
A few lines that really spoke to me:
Behind being angry at others who are better
Behind being comfortable with shrugging off whatever'
Behind losing yourself to a constant anxiety
Is a purpose that's screaming for you to wake up
And see that behind every fear is a wish
And behind every wish is a dream
And behind all the things that you feel are obstacles
Is simply you putting an excuse in-between.
_________________
When you wake your eyes are drawn to the screen
And I imagine all the people before us
Who didn't have these things
Who'd have lazed and lounged and gazed
Touched and smiled and yawned and snaked.
____________________
This collection was also really witty at times too, and it was great to get the more lighthearted sections amongst the pretty sad tone of the whole book.
If you’re interested in poetry this is a great one to dive into, it’s incredibly relatable for our generation.
July 16, 2024
ljudbok. kort.
August 25, 2021
As a moderate fan of Charly Cox's slightly overwritten and frequently overwrought first volume, 'she must be mad', I wasn't expecting big things of Validate Me, but things nonetheless. Unfortunately, the fame and free time seem to have gone to her head, knocking most of those promising phrases we read a couple of years ago straight out the other side.
Rather than progression, this second volume is a regression - and a lengthy one at that. With a host of pages that are blank, filler or filled by titles in the style of a Windows Movie Maker effect, circa 2007, the author and her publisher have managed to stretch what could have been a slim book of Insta-poetry for the short of attention into 165 gruelling, repetitive, self-indulgent and profoundly uninspiring pages.
Poetic form and ingenuity are largely dispensed with in favour of a one-note complaint on having internet fame, friends, a phone and too many one-night stands that shockingly don't flourish into healthy, functional relationships. And, by allowing the reader such a deep glimpse into her psyche, the author has unwittingly revealed just how under-populated her inner life really is, somewhat akin to an episode of The Kardashians where Kim sits alone in a large, empty room, whispering sweet nothings to the reflection in the screen of her phone.
Yes, there are occasional insights into matters which mean something to women at large rather than just image-obsessed, well-to-do, Thames Valley types, but the author can't keep herself and her highly subjective sense of angst out of the spotlight long enough to put such moments to good use. This is only amplified throughout by language that has the specificity of a horoscope and the potent imagery of a reference index.
ELLE said 'Charly's work champions young women trying to navigate the modern world', but I would advise any young woman with a desire for belonging, adventure and empowerment to pass on this and spend some time in the company of Selima Hill, Maya Angelou, Sylvia Plath and the original feminist poet, Emily Dickinson. Whatever else Validate Me may be, it is not a book for those interested in poetry.
Rather than progression, this second volume is a regression - and a lengthy one at that. With a host of pages that are blank, filler or filled by titles in the style of a Windows Movie Maker effect, circa 2007, the author and her publisher have managed to stretch what could have been a slim book of Insta-poetry for the short of attention into 165 gruelling, repetitive, self-indulgent and profoundly uninspiring pages.
Poetic form and ingenuity are largely dispensed with in favour of a one-note complaint on having internet fame, friends, a phone and too many one-night stands that shockingly don't flourish into healthy, functional relationships. And, by allowing the reader such a deep glimpse into her psyche, the author has unwittingly revealed just how under-populated her inner life really is, somewhat akin to an episode of The Kardashians where Kim sits alone in a large, empty room, whispering sweet nothings to the reflection in the screen of her phone.
Yes, there are occasional insights into matters which mean something to women at large rather than just image-obsessed, well-to-do, Thames Valley types, but the author can't keep herself and her highly subjective sense of angst out of the spotlight long enough to put such moments to good use. This is only amplified throughout by language that has the specificity of a horoscope and the potent imagery of a reference index.
ELLE said 'Charly's work champions young women trying to navigate the modern world', but I would advise any young woman with a desire for belonging, adventure and empowerment to pass on this and spend some time in the company of Selima Hill, Maya Angelou, Sylvia Plath and the original feminist poet, Emily Dickinson. Whatever else Validate Me may be, it is not a book for those interested in poetry.
March 28, 2020
This is my first poetry book that I have read of Charly Cox, it was sent to me by HarperCollins to read and review and I am so happy that they did. I thoroughly enjoyed this poetry book. Her book was interwoven with prose and poems, it was an enlightening, raw, and honest read. The writer was highly intelligent and it clearly showed in her work. She made me feel SEEN as a young women, navigating the dark and ugly sides of social media, the devastating effects of toxic relationships, and the torment of equally wanting so badly to hide from the world and yet also to be seen by it almost simultaneously. It was painful to relate to certain moments, but also a welcome relief too, in knowing that one is not alone. She has skillfully interwoven the intricacies of love and dating in the time of social media and technology, highlighting the difficulties that it poses and the fears and insecurities that come along with it. Being torn between knowing one's own self worth and yet, still, having that desperate NEED for someone to come along and show it to you. This book relished in the ugly, hidden side to a social media presence and pointed out the hypocrisies that come from it. I enjoyed her wit, humor, and intelligence through her work. Reading this felt like the author, in the desperate plight of her own validation, was validating ME. Thank you.
January 15, 2020
I was really enamored with Charly's book She must be Mad so immediately bought this one. I liked Validate Me but in comparison it's just okay. I think that I'll need to re-read this at a time where I am more willing to absorb it. At the moment 3 stars, needs a second read.
January 4, 2024
⭐️ star
“#instapoets
What's the point of having a good turn of phrase
When with it you've really got nothing to say.”
why write a review when the poet already included one?
while you could argue the poet had something to say, it was neither well construed or original. yet again modern poetry has fooled me into thinking i could publish my phone notes.
“#instapoets
What's the point of having a good turn of phrase
When with it you've really got nothing to say.”
why write a review when the poet already included one?
while you could argue the poet had something to say, it was neither well construed or original. yet again modern poetry has fooled me into thinking i could publish my phone notes.
July 22, 2024
Really enjoyed this, and the poetry was fantastic in terms of emotional response, but only four stars because some parts made me genuinely uncomfortable when reading them? The structure though, is *chefs kiss*
February 9, 2020
Our souls are the same
March 4, 2020
It's okay, but doesn't really have any poems I can relate to.
December 26, 2019
This book is hard to rate. This collection isn't less good than
She Must Be Mad
on a purely skill-based level, but I, personally, didn't connect to it as much as I did SMBM. Charly Cox is one of my favourite poets, and her work is always accessible to people like me, who don't read much poetry, and in this collection her talent continues to shine through.
I wish I had this collection a couple of years ago. I think it would have helped me get through what I was going through then. That's why I'm struggling to rate this. I don't know if the material is just not as good/relatable, or if it's just me. I've settled on a rating for now but that might change in the future. Either way I recommend this book and Charly Cox in general.
I wish I had this collection a couple of years ago. I think it would have helped me get through what I was going through then. That's why I'm struggling to rate this. I don't know if the material is just not as good/relatable, or if it's just me. I've settled on a rating for now but that might change in the future. Either way I recommend this book and Charly Cox in general.
December 28, 2019
I'm probably about 25 years too old to appreciate this and a notorious philistine when it comes to poetry anyway, and a bloke to boot. But it was interesting. I got flashes of "By Grand Central Station I Sat Down and Wept" in a couple of places, and of course Fleabag is the other cultural reference point that jumps out. But it's very much a product of... Well I almost said "the internet", but more accurately, its a product of apps. On one level, it says as much, in the title and the introduction, but like so much now, the knowingness comes across as more pretence and the reader (well, this reader, anyway) is unable to find a fixed point of reference to understand what's real and what's just a deflection, just an endless saying "notice me, notice me" in a world that's so connected that real connection is virtually impossible.
February 9, 2020
i can't really say that i consider it "bad". i'm mostly unsure but it wasn't for me anyways. should've looked at it more closely before i bought it since i generally don't like short prose in poetry collections and i really don't like poetry that never uses punctuation for no obvious meaning
April 22, 2022
Validate Me is a book of poems, and short prose pieces, about life, lived online, and the difference between the digital world, and our true, analogue selves.
The poems use simple language to make serious points, like Twitter they are limited by word and character counts that say a lot. The short prose pieces are mainly character studies, finding fleeting meaning in a medium that is so often devoid of it.
However, after a while, the simplicity of the poetry gets to be a bit one-dimensional, and where a poem could have gone deeper, it stays on the surface, never bothering to search for much in the way of depth, or pathos. She has been variously described as the voice of her generation, or as Social Media’s Answer to Carol Ann Duffy, but the problem is that Charly Cox was a social media star before she became a writer, and it shows in the book. There are a lot of interesting ideas in the book, and maybe some more in-depth, longer, short stories would also be a good idea for development.
As an interesting look at the impact that Social Media has on mental health, a person’s self-worth and where they see themselves in the world, Validate Me is a good study, and Charly Cox herself is a force for good in raising the issues of mental health, and how social media has an impact on it, and she has a solid following of her work on all of the social media platforms.
Validate Me is an interesting idea, with many things to commend it, and if it does get people into reading poetry, then that is a good thing, but at the moment the book seems to have too much hyperbole and not enough depth, but I suspect that I am not in the target audience for the collection anyway.
The poems use simple language to make serious points, like Twitter they are limited by word and character counts that say a lot. The short prose pieces are mainly character studies, finding fleeting meaning in a medium that is so often devoid of it.
However, after a while, the simplicity of the poetry gets to be a bit one-dimensional, and where a poem could have gone deeper, it stays on the surface, never bothering to search for much in the way of depth, or pathos. She has been variously described as the voice of her generation, or as Social Media’s Answer to Carol Ann Duffy, but the problem is that Charly Cox was a social media star before she became a writer, and it shows in the book. There are a lot of interesting ideas in the book, and maybe some more in-depth, longer, short stories would also be a good idea for development.
As an interesting look at the impact that Social Media has on mental health, a person’s self-worth and where they see themselves in the world, Validate Me is a good study, and Charly Cox herself is a force for good in raising the issues of mental health, and how social media has an impact on it, and she has a solid following of her work on all of the social media platforms.
Validate Me is an interesting idea, with many things to commend it, and if it does get people into reading poetry, then that is a good thing, but at the moment the book seems to have too much hyperbole and not enough depth, but I suspect that I am not in the target audience for the collection anyway.
September 3, 2023
Rate: 4.5/5.
"Validate Me" is a thought-provoking collection of short poems and stories that offers a sharp and witty commentary on our modern obsession with social media and the quest for external validation. The young author's sarcasm shines through every page, delivering a refreshing take on the pitfalls of our digital age.
The author's keen observation of individual consumed by social media and grappling with mental health issues is both insightful and brutally honest. Through a series of concise narratives, she poets back the layers of the facade many of us present online, revealing the deep-seated need for validation that lurks beneath the surface.
What sets "Validate Me" apart is the author's remarkable ability to convey her message through clever rhymes. Her use of language is not only skillful but also highly engaging, making each poem and story a delight to read. The poems, in particular, leave a lasting impression with their memorable verses and biting humor. It's a timely reminder of the importance of authentic self-worth and the dangers of relying too heavily on external validation.
But it's worth noting that, due to the author's young age, the depth of insight into these complex topics may not be as profound as some readers might expect. While the sarcasm and wit are undoubtedly the strengths of the book, they occasionally overshadow the opportunity for deeper exploration. Although the book may not delve as deeply as some might hope, its overall message and wit make it a refreshing addition to the conversation surrounding social media and mental health.
"Validate Me" is a thought-provoking collection of short poems and stories that offers a sharp and witty commentary on our modern obsession with social media and the quest for external validation. The young author's sarcasm shines through every page, delivering a refreshing take on the pitfalls of our digital age.
The author's keen observation of individual consumed by social media and grappling with mental health issues is both insightful and brutally honest. Through a series of concise narratives, she poets back the layers of the facade many of us present online, revealing the deep-seated need for validation that lurks beneath the surface.
What sets "Validate Me" apart is the author's remarkable ability to convey her message through clever rhymes. Her use of language is not only skillful but also highly engaging, making each poem and story a delight to read. The poems, in particular, leave a lasting impression with their memorable verses and biting humor. It's a timely reminder of the importance of authentic self-worth and the dangers of relying too heavily on external validation.
But it's worth noting that, due to the author's young age, the depth of insight into these complex topics may not be as profound as some readers might expect. While the sarcasm and wit are undoubtedly the strengths of the book, they occasionally overshadow the opportunity for deeper exploration. Although the book may not delve as deeply as some might hope, its overall message and wit make it a refreshing addition to the conversation surrounding social media and mental health.
February 5, 2022
Rating 2.5 stars
This collection leaves me very conflicted. On the one hand, I believe that all the ideas and concepts and poems are relatable to the present day, but the execution will remove you from the immersion of reading. Sometimes I want to find the meaning for myself. Sometimes I want to be told. There’s a time and place for everything. However, Cox tends to do both, often at the same time. The short stories, especially, would start very engaging and then lose my interest. They dragged at times. It felt self-indulgent and the telling vs showing became repetitive. Some of the poems left me cringing or felt underdeveloped, as if there was no editing done at all. That being said, it’s still a very relatable, very accessible, short book.
This collection leaves me very conflicted. On the one hand, I believe that all the ideas and concepts and poems are relatable to the present day, but the execution will remove you from the immersion of reading. Sometimes I want to find the meaning for myself. Sometimes I want to be told. There’s a time and place for everything. However, Cox tends to do both, often at the same time. The short stories, especially, would start very engaging and then lose my interest. They dragged at times. It felt self-indulgent and the telling vs showing became repetitive. Some of the poems left me cringing or felt underdeveloped, as if there was no editing done at all. That being said, it’s still a very relatable, very accessible, short book.
March 18, 2022
Painfully honest. Disturbingly relatable. Inexplicably lovable.
Charly Cox has written a truly genius modern masterpiece in this collection of poems and prose. Covering how modern life eats away at our souls, encouraging one thing whilst publicly shaming another leaving the recipient of the information not only confused but also more susceptible to developing mental illness. Cox says loud and clear what we are all thinking, laying her innermost thoughts right out on the table without any shame.
An empowering read.
It will make you want to put your phone down forever.
And then pick it back up again 5 minutes later!
Charly Cox has written a truly genius modern masterpiece in this collection of poems and prose. Covering how modern life eats away at our souls, encouraging one thing whilst publicly shaming another leaving the recipient of the information not only confused but also more susceptible to developing mental illness. Cox says loud and clear what we are all thinking, laying her innermost thoughts right out on the table without any shame.
An empowering read.
It will make you want to put your phone down forever.
And then pick it back up again 5 minutes later!
June 17, 2024
A low three stars, maybe even a 2.5. This was a fairly average expedience for me. Some of the poems were so overly simple they felt pointless, while others were overwritten to the point of being incomprehensible. There were a few good lines here and there, but nothing that stuck with me.
The prose I felt more of a connection too, but nothing to leave me feeling shook to the core. A lot of this collection focuses on dating and wanting to feel seen and validated, which I can appreciate was familiar to me in my early twenties but not so much now I’m in my thirties. Perhaps I’m simply the wrong age demographic for this collection.
The prose I felt more of a connection too, but nothing to leave me feeling shook to the core. A lot of this collection focuses on dating and wanting to feel seen and validated, which I can appreciate was familiar to me in my early twenties but not so much now I’m in my thirties. Perhaps I’m simply the wrong age demographic for this collection.
January 27, 2025
“My rhetoric is changing / My need for love confused / I’ve lost my inner monologue / And sold it all for views.” Validate Me, Charly Cox’s second book of poems and prose Validate Me (subtitled A Life of Code-Dependency), is every bit the follow-up to She Must Be Mad that you might expect it to be. She writes about modern life and the intersection of technology and identity with great acuity, getting right to the heart of things; and while the poems are deeply confessional they reverberate into the universal. Above all I love Charly Cox most for her humour, her ability to feel and to mock in the same moment, the same line or phrase.
October 10, 2019
I absolutely adored her first book but for some reason I just didn’t connect to this one. I really struggled to get into it. With her last book there were so many that stood out to me and really spoke to me, but there wasn’t one single piece of writing in this one that I feel will stick with me.
Disappointed!
I will however read any other books Cox May realise in the hope that I resonate with anymore of her writings.
Disappointed!
I will however read any other books Cox May realise in the hope that I resonate with anymore of her writings.
October 22, 2020
This wasn't my favorite poetry collection, but it still made me feel, especially the prose. The poetry felt like it should have been read aloud at a slam poetry event at a hipster coffee shop, which isn't really my cup of tea, but may be others.
My favorites were:
-Can a Machine Understand the Human Heart?
-All Reads are Good
-Bath
-Inspiring Quote on Backdrop of Ocean I'll Never Swim in
-The Conception
-#bodypositive
My favorites were:
-Can a Machine Understand the Human Heart?
-All Reads are Good
-Bath
-Inspiring Quote on Backdrop of Ocean I'll Never Swim in
-The Conception
-#bodypositive
February 21, 2023
I wanted to like this book, but didn't relate to more than a couple poems. It felt like privileged blabbering and complaining about nothing in fancy words. I like the themes she was trying to approach, but could not for the life of me decipher her intricate sentence structures and random thoughts and words mixed together. Also I hope she's aware there are much worse things going on out there but being broke in a member's club. Not for me.
July 13, 2020
I enjoy Charly Cox as a poet. This wasn't as emotional as She Must Be Mad, but still had some powerful poems that definitely resonated with me. I listened to the audio and feel like that helped me connect more with the poems as well. There's something about hearing the author read the work that really adds something for me. I look forward to more work from Cox in the future.
November 28, 2020
I actually met Charly at an event for this book, it was in a basement of a cinema in York; and it was a wonderful evening, to listen to her speak her poetry! I didn't end up reading this cover to cover until months later, but it was like I was waiting until I needed to hear it most! The things she touches on with her poems, I so strongly related too, it was cathartic to just lose myself in this.
February 20, 2020
Definitely recommended it and will reread it for sure. It’s the perfect mixture of poetry and prose. You will find perfect descriptions of life and the poetry parts are the modern poetry that I needed in my life.
February 26, 2020
I really enjoy a lot of Charly's poetry but this collection didn't resonate me. I enjoyed the prose pieces throughout the collection but the poetry wasn't my favourite. I need to pick up You Must Be Mad as I think that may be more up my alley.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 81 reviews