The Sea Ain't Mine Alone

by C.L. Beaumont

For James Campbell, winning the 1976 International Surf Competition is the ticket to his future. It's his chance to finally reclaim his life, move on from the war, and make a living doing the only thing that keeps him from walking away from it all. But his best laid plans are upended completely when two-time Billabong Pipeline Masters Champion Danny Moore steps up next to James on the starting line. Danny is a young, mysterious, unbeatable big wave surfer. He's man that nobody on the surf circuit can stop whispering about. For the first time since being shipped back home from Vietnam, James is captivated. That first fleeting moment turns the tide for both men, setting them on a path that crosses oceans and defies all odds. This epically romantic m/m historical romance is a slow burn that is full of drama, thrilling surfing, deep emotional connections between the characters, and guarantees the reader a hugely satisfying Happily Ever After!

Genres: Romance, M M Romance, Sports, Historical, LGBT, Historical Fiction, Queer

538 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 5, 2019

Reviews

[Noah · Rating 4 out of 5]

“He opens his eyes wide, and he squints against the gushing wind on his face, and he sees a vast, incomprehensible beauty, laid bare for the two of them alone.”

Hey, what do you know? I thought that this was actually pretty good. Trust me, I’m just as surprised as you are. Well, “pretty good” is kind of selling it short because this was great. I don’t think I’ve read something that’s managed to drum up the same kinds of dormant sentimental emotions I have buried inside since I read Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford. It’s not even that this story is all that bittersweet or sad by itself (happy ending, woohoo), but I cared about the character’s well-being so strongly that everything they had to go through made me melancholic on more than one occasion. Just call me an empath, I guess. I think the reason why my first inclination is to lessen my praise for a book that should probably be rated higher is that… I’ve got to say, getting into the groove took some work, work, work, work, work, work. And it wasn’t even a length issue (teehee), because I’m pretty sure I’ve read at least a couple of five-hundred-pagers during my time with this book, but it’s probably more of just where I’m at right now in terms of the kinds of things I’m into. So yeah, it’s really not this book’s fault that I’ve been knee deep into the fantasy genre for months now. I mean, I came around to it in the end though, and that’s all that matters! Though, I feel like it’s important to know that I had, like, this “pre-read” process in order to psych myself up enough to sit my ass down and read the damn thing. It’s somewhat elaborate, but the whole thing basically consisted of:
• Faffing about.
• Horsing around.
• Crying. Reading something else entirely for a bit.
But after completing those simple steps, I was roaring to go! Normally I wouldn’t harp on and on too much about how long a book is because… it’s whatever, you know? The story’s going to be as long as the story’s going to be. But the fact that it wears its heart on its sleeve so blatantly can be draining after a while, so I think it’s valid that a lot of people had a challenge with its length (har har). It’s probably best to read this one in small doses, because otherwise, there might be too much sadness and yearning included here to shotgun in one go.

Thankfully, that ends the complaining section because I literally didn’t have any other issues with the book! It’s all uphill from here! Wait, that’s the good one, right? Downhill, uphill… anyway, as for the writing itself, I’ve seen a few criticisms that this book felt overwritten, and I honestly can’t refute that. It’s more of a personal taste thing, because I’m a huge fan of both blunt, simplistic prose (like Circe) and indulgent, flowery affairs (like a Frankenstein). Besides, it also helps that I’ve built up a tolerance for overly wordy stories after watching 2018’s blockbuster hit Destination Wedding starring Keanu Reeves and Winona Ryder. Oh, I have a theory about the cover, I think the reason why this author’s next work, Names for the Dawn (my personal favorite), has a cover that’s more on the nondescript side is because a lot of people probably went into this one, The Sea Ain't Mine Alone, expecting something a little sexier, a little lighter. I mean, you got two shirtless surfer dudes hanging out in Hawaii (I’ve been to there once. On an unrelated note, did you know cockroaches could fly?), it’s definitely going to be a nonstop shag-fest, right? Yeah well, not really. It definitely seems like it'd be a more chill story if you’re going off the cover alone, so I don’t really blame people for expecting something more tantalizing. Because what we have instead is a story filled with grief, trauma, and the process of navigating through bigotry. Well personally, I think finding healing and acceptance in a cruel world is pretty sexy too! In fact, I’m forever grateful that this book is barely about surfing because I’ve never been a sports kind of guy. Shocking, I know. See, my problem is that I’ve never been good at pretending to know what’s going on like a lot of other dudes are able to. Whenever I’ve been at Super Bowl parties, I’d just sit there, stone-face. Yeah, so I’m glad that that the surfing in this book is used more as a tool to explore James’ and Sydney’s trauma and their journey of getting better rather than a story straight-up about surfing competitions. Metaphors, yay!

And since I’m still here for some reason, I think I need to say that this novel is almost entirely character driven, so it came as an incredible relief that I actually liked the characters. What’s great about how they’re written is that it manages the task of being subversive without trying. It’d be so easy to delegate these characters to basic tropes; James is outgoing and calm on the outside while Sydney contrasts that by covering his insecurities by being overly snarky, sarcastic, and guarded as a defense mechanism. But by simply having them converse with each other throughout the book in the way real people would (they have fights, but no contrived break-ups), they’re given more life than any single list of character traits and checklist tropes could ever come up with. They were both great, but I especially related to Sydney. It actually got to the point where it was a little hard to read because I could see myself so clearly on the page. I know what it’s like to be overly defensive, and I definitely know what it’s like to be in a room and only like one person there. His journey throughout this story was painfully poignant. The fear of vulnerability, and then that elation when he realizes that he hadn’t been rejected? That’s real. This book may be a historical-fiction, but that internal, raging turmoil is timeless; for better or for worse. It tends to be taken for granted now, but that need to be constantly overthinking and lessening yourself so you’re never accidentally outed was perfectly portrayed through both Sydney and James’ actions. Some fears just never leave us, even as we grow older. And even if some of the ways both characters in this book react to the possibility of being seen openly as queer might seem overly dramatic at points, that palpable fear isn’t just paranoia, it’s a way of survival. Yeah, so this book was pretty great! Did it need to be this long? Well, probably not, but damn, I'm so glad it was. These character’s past histories were so littered with pain and suffering, that I felt it was more than necessary to indulge in a story about them finding happiness and then have them just being happy for a while, however long it took. The truth is, there are some stories that can’t be told through brevity. Besides, there’s so much pain in queer history, so it’s of paramount importance to never forget that there’s an abundance of love too.

Well, here I am writing you a love song / Holding back those years / It's been so long (Rendezvous – Craig David).

[lila · Rating 5 out of 5]

— 5++ stars ☆

sydneyjames have taken my heart with them to the sea. they are everything 🥰 and ngl, i have such a soft spot for Sydney 🥺 my boy, he's just too precious. i'm not even gonna try to articulate them into words bc they were too beautiful. 😭💞

the longing was too deep and gorgeous and pure and i'm dying rn. 😭🥰✨ and the style of writing? IT WAS SO BRILLIANT AND LOVELY i was melting so much -

the characters in this? even the side characters, Rob and Lori - they own my heart. i'm going to treasure this forever, bc the way this book made me feel was everything. 💘 why isn't there an infinity star rating on goodreads?! 😩 this deserves everything. 💕

i even cried at the wedding scene, and i NEVER cry at wedding scenes. ever. 😭 that should show how much i adored this. if i even try putting quotes for this one i'll never be able to stop, so i'll just put one-

❝Please...❞ he murmurs across the sand. ❝Come back to me.❞

this was so beautifully powerful 😌✨. the end.

[nark · Rating 5 out of 5]

that feeling of finding a new favourite. my heart is so happy.🖤

✦ i absolutely loved this. it's such a well written, beautiful book. the incredible atmosphere, the beautiful descriptions of the ocean, the sunlight, the beaches, the warm wind, the waves, the surfing. i could imagine everything so vividly while reading.

✦ this had such nuanced characters that you can't help but love. Sydney and James are definitely going to my list of favourite couples of all time. i truly came to care for both of these characters.

✦ the slow burn and the tension between these two... just incredible. i can't even explain how they made my heart flutter and clench from all the feelings. these two just complete each other.

✦ that HEA was SO beautiful. just pure perfection.🖤

✦ this book truly swept me away. this had equal amounts of angst, fluffy moments, steam, happiness and sadness. i highly recommend it to any MM romance lover. you won't regret giving this book a shot.

✦ another random thought i can't help but share: teenage me is screaming, because i used to be obsessed with the movie Point Break, and i couldn't help but ship Bodhi and Johnny. so let me just imagine that they too moved to a little beach house together, and lived happily ever after, just like Sydney and James.

[Kati *☆･ﾟ · Rating 5 out of 5]

* ☘︎ :･ﾟFAVORITE READ 2022 :･ﾟ☘︎ *


re-read January 2025

Reading this book or even only thinking about it always makes me so unbelievably happy. ☼♡♡☼


Peculiar but random fact: Near the North Shore Beach on O’ahu, Hawaii, where they hold one of the most prestigious surfing competitions each year, there is a National Wildlife Refuge that has the same name as one of our mcs and was established the same year our James here won the Billabong Pipeline Masters of 1976. Huh!


5***** wavey stars


This is one of those books for me. A top-shelf one. Where the story just pulled me in so I wanted to stay there and with the characters forever. I was smiling a lot while reading it —not laughing, but smiling. A lot.

As this book was a long one, there was almost no way to keep this review short. But I hope you read it and get why I loved this so much.

*********

For James — The love affair began with salt.
For Sydney — The love affair began with physics.
Their respective love affair with surfing.

It’s 1976 when the main characters meet for the first time and Danny Moore is already kind of a legend in the surfing community while Jimmy Campbell is not even pro yet even though he’s a decade older than Danny.

Sydney Danny Moore is not very well liked. First because he is a know-it-all and kind of a jerk to others and because of the rumors surrounding his sexuality. But to be fair, Sydney kind of does know it all, he’s a genius and I assume no one else knows the ocean and the waves better than he does.

James "Jimmy“ Campbell at that time is a Vietnam veteran and surfing is one of the few things he has in life that are good. Surfing eases his mind and keeps the memories of the war at bay.


After the first competition they spent another few days in each other’s company. Surfing together. Getting to know each other better. Getting closer. Until Danny has to leave for Hawaii where they will meet again. Getting even closer - in Danny’s small hut on the beach.

☼ ☼ ☼

Danny Moore is jogging through the thick crowd towards the shoreline, …
“Well fuck me, Danny Moore is surfing in this now?”

“—not surfing this year, but our own reigning champion Danny Moore is deep in this barrel, folks, …”

This was one of my favorite moments in the book. We are at the Billabong Pipeline Masters finals — a competition Sydney has won twice already. He’s not surfing this one, but James is. Everyone is convinced this is just having a little fun for Moore before the finals start. But Sydney has a motive…

“I just went out there to test the current,”

For him. For James. Because he knows the ocean. ♡♡♡

“James,” he says again, … “I’ve never wanted anything more in my life than I wanted you to win that title. It was the most invested I have ever been in a competition. …”

One of the things I loved so much in this book was, that for the world, the crowd, they were Danny Moore and Jimmy Campbell. But for each other, in private, they were Sydney and James.


With both their background stories [James losing his mother as a child and almost dying in the Vietnam war and Sydney losing his mother too in a way and being outcast by his father at 15 and then everybody else for being gay] this could have made for a pretty angsty book. We learn about these things while reading, sure, but the author obv decided not to crash our hearts with it. Only feel with them. Feel what they experienced in life to even further appreciate what they’ve found in each other when they did.


And God their happiness. Their love. It was everything. ♡
And if this book wasn’t already long enough we probably get the most extended epilogue ever written. But I loved every freaking second of it.


Some might say that the story dragged in the end. That the book was unnecessarily long. I mean sure, we are talking well over five hundred pages here. And I can see why they felt this way.

But - even if they already got their happy ending at around eighty percent I hadn’t had enough and I was glad that there still were a hundred pages left. I felt I needed the closure, the uptie of loose ends and to see for myself that they could truly be happy -- being gay back then in the 70’s and all.


This story has a rather slow pace and maybe it slows down even further near the end. But I didn’t mind it at all. And that says a lot as I’m all for a fast paced read. But - in my opinion this book was made for just staying there. With them. Inside their story. And enjoy all the details and the experiences the characters make as if you were actually there with them. The author’s way of writing this story leaves you no other choice.

And the writing really was exceptional. It painted such a vivid picture for me and let me feel all the feels. Their experiences and happiness palpable. I can only recommend to take the time to read and fully enjoy this beautiful book. I promise you can almost hear the sound and crashing of the waves yourself.

☼ ☼ ☼ it was the perfect summer read ☼ ☼ ☼

side note: If you are new to the whole surfing thing like me I recommend to watch a few videos online to get a better picture of it and the terminology.

[Evie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of the most tender and emotional romances I have come across in a long time and I can see why it has become a beloved favourite by so many people.

Jimmy Campbell needs to win the Hermosa Beach 1976 International Surf Competition in order to break into the Pro surfing circuit, unfortunately a last minute addition has him paired up against the handsome surf prodigy Sydney ‘Danny’ Moore. But it isn’t long before they both realise that there is an explosive chemistry simmering just below the surface of this surfing rivalry.

This book had one of the most effortlessly cool vibes I have encountered in a long time, whilst also possessing this really emotionally serene anchor in James and Sydneys relationship. I was surprised by how much of a sense of peace I got from this book considering how central the surf competitions were, which really had moments of quite high tension. I found myself googling pictures and videos of the surfing scene in Los Angeles and Hawaii in the 1970s and it was just such an iconically cool period of time.

I adored James and Sydney both together and as individual characters. I won’t go into too much detail with regards to each of their histories because I think it’s beautiful to learn each layer of their characters organically in the story, but they possess one of my favourite relationship dynamics of two lost and lonely men finding a safe harbour of love, support and connection in the other.

For a few content advisories, whilst never explicitly stated, Sydney was written in a way that clearly read as autistic. I thought though that the way that this was incorporated into the story was lovely and very organic representation. There is also a 10 year age gap between James (32) and Sydney (22) however, this isn’t sexualised and is more treated just as a fact of life. This story also heavily features period specific homophobia. This manifests in a way that presents as a barrier to them being out together in public, rather than as a source of angst or overt violence in the story. The story also explores James’ PTSD and anxiety following his brief time as a sailor in Vietnam where he was shot and does allude to suicidal ideation at times. I thought that all of these themes were treated respectfully and used in a way to further the characters and their relationships and never trivialised.

Given that this is a debut (which…. I mean… wow) I am being a little gracious with the minor critiques I have. This book is a complete brick at 538 pages and realistically it could have easily been 100 pages shorter if the lyrical prose was tightened up a bit. I didn’t hate it though, as I think it added to the tenderness of the story but I definitely had a few moments where I thought it got bogged down a bit in itself. Also fair warning, this is a dangerous book to play the ‘one more chapter’ game with because some chapters were a respectable 15 minutes and then BAM suddenly a 51 minute long chapter.

I think the highest compliment I could give this book is that, despite it being a KU book, I immediately went and purchased a copy so I wouldn’t need to return it. This was a 4.5 star read and while I ordinarily would have probably rated down, this book has been a slump killer for me, so I am going to rate up ❤️

[Han · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 SKY AND OCEAN STARS!

my brief summary:

Meet James: Our golden blonde who doesn’t share much is the up and coming local surfing pro who secretly has a crush on his one and only friend. With a mysterious past he doesn’t like to share about after coming from Vietnam, Jimmy Campbell is looking (while also doubting himself) to be the next surfing champion, even if he is a decade older than most of the other competitors.

Meet Sydney: Two-time winning Billabong Pipeline Masters Champion known by everyone as Danny Moore who always wears his hair or his aviators on his face from Oahu. He is a proud and intriguing asshole, and one of the only known gay surfers.

Our story set in the late 70s is about two men, one ocean, many waves and a love found in the middle of curiosity, tension, many bantering sessions and a heart for surfing. After a competition, where the previously winning champ loses to the rookie. Danny/Sydney volunteers to help Jimmy/James win the next Billabong Pipeline Masters. The push and pull of these two leads them into uncharted waters they haven’t been in before.

Thoughts:
To say I adored this book, and its characters is an understatement. If there is one thing anyone knows about me, it’s that angst books are part of my genetic make-up. This book gives you more than just angst though. It brings the sweetness, tenderness, and goofiness that makes my face turn into the happy pout or heart eye emoji. There are serious topics dealt with, but in such a careful way while not brushing it aside, which is so wonderful to see.

I could rave about Sydney and James all day! Their flirtation and banter is so pure and adorable. I laughed aloud and burrowed into my blankets at home happily while reading to just stay in their world. There are a lot of repeated phrases in this book, but they filled my heart so much each time they were said. For those in love for the first time who don’t always have a chance to express their love openly in front of others, they deserve every touch and soft phrase said a million times.

This book is read at a slower/medium-ish pace like waves crashing on the shore. It is to be absorbed while consuming. If you are in search of a love story with all the feels and a happy ever after, look no further!

I did my best to describe how this book made me feel, but words cannot do it justice. I loved it with all my heart!



image from google photos

Would I recommend this and to who:
YES - THIS IS A LOVE STORY THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL THAT EVERYONE SHOULD READ!
Paperback/Hardcover/Audiobook/E-book:
E-Book - Kindle Unlimited
How did I discover this:
My love, lila - I WAS BLESSED WITH THIS RECOMMENDATION! IN LILA I ALWAYS TRUST! <3
Pace:
Medium overall
POV:
James and Sydney

Quotes: (As per usual I will not apologize for how many quotes I have! I hope this entices you to read it, but be mindful this gives some spoilers of course!)
“You were brave”

“You want this,” Danny breathes, his voice uncharacteristically shaking. James’ answer falls effortlessly from his lips. “Yes.” Danny swallows hard and blinks. “With me?” The question is so small, so tiny and fragile in the air. The unspoken “and not Rob” hands like a trembling secret between them. James closes his eyes and thinks of holding a picture of a curly-haired little boy in his hands. “God, Sydney, yes. More than anything.”

“So, genius, is there anything you can’t take one look at and know fucking everything about?” Sydney knows he’s joking, but the answer that falls immediately from his lips comes from the truest pit of his chest. “You.”

“But honestly, that’s not even the insane thing. The insane thing is that I so badly just wanna say ‘fuck the Billabong,’ and fuck all those things that I wanted, because what I want more than anything right now is to stay here and kiss every inch of you.”

“You are a marvel.”

“Come on, man, tease me. Be cocky like that because I’m here. I’m not going anywhere, and you fucking got me.”

yes, I am here, can’t you see that it would physically hurt me to leave you? That the trails of kisses you left on my back would split open and bleed if I turned away? That I can’t ever go back?

“Stop thinking for five seconds and come fuck me,”

“Who the hell are you?”

“I love you.” Lost immediately to the rushing hiss of the water. “God, I love you.”

“No, no, no, this whole ‘captain’ thing has gotta go. Right now. Gone.” “Yes, Cap’n,” Sydney smirks.

“You are something else,”

“I’m not sure what the hell I did to deserve you.” James huffs as he runs his hands up Sydney’s spine. “I’m not sure either, because you can be a fucking asshole sometimes.”

“I wanted to see you again,” he whispers, and James draws in a breath at the raw sound of Sydney’s words. Sydney traces the scar. “I thought you were beautiful, and I wanted to see you, and I wondered what it would be like to hold you,

“You saved me,” he says, throat tight. “And I love you.”

Triggers:
Homophobia, Sexual Content, Mental Illness, War, Suicidal Thoughts, Grief, Injury, Death, Near-Death Experience, Trauma, etc.


🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊
__________________________

RTC - Sydney and James may have not invented love, but they reinvented it!!

This might hands down be one of the best books I have read all year!

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊
__________________________
@49% and had to mark this quote: "yes, I am here, can't you see that it would physically hurt me to leave you? That the trails of kisses you left on my back would split open and bleed if I turned away? That I can't ever go back?' 🥺😭 THEM!

Apparently I'm not reading enough books at one time! 🙃

psssst - lila made me do it!

[Dia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this one! Can't believe it's a debut book!! I will try to keep it as spoiler free as I can.

It was a freebie when I grabbed it from Amazon, and I have to admit I was pretty excited about it because it has a huge rating on Goodreads. Well I got burned many times before, so many readers enjoy sweet and angst-free stories, but I'm not one of them.
Like I said, it's a debut book and I was a little skeptical, but this one turned out to be more than I expected and I love it when I'm pleasantly surprised.

The beginning was a little slow for my taste. We get a ride into James' past. But when James meets the one and only Danny Moore, I got glued to the pages. I am not a fan slow burning romance and here things move at snail's pace, BUT I loved it anyway. The action in this book takes place in 1976. We have two complex characters, James and Danny/ Sydney. They're both surfers. Sydney - I prefer this name - is undefeated and a world winning champion. James dreams to go pro. Their first interactions are loaded with energy and attraction. Sydney is a bastard with a reputation. James is older and just a nice man.

What I loved the most about it would be the writing. The author surely knew how to grab my attention. I knew nothing about surfing, and barrels and waves ... surfing competitions. Still, I couldn't put it down. I've read it pretty quickly and it's not a short one, more than 500 pages.

To be honest this isn't a super hot story. As much as I love hot and sometimes taboo stories, from time to time I discover stories that grab me completely with their uniqueness. Here we get two troubled men, both carrying their scars in their own way. They are different and still something connected them.

The truth is the beauty here lays in how the author revealed their story. It was painfully slow at times, but I felt like I was transported on those beaches, it was like I could smell the salty air, feel the waves under my feet - and I'm afraid of drowning in real life.
Sometimes I wanted the action to speed a bit, but it was still extremely well written. It felt real, possible.

The ending was extremely sweet and I was left wondering how many gay couples really got their wishes come true, back in the '70s.

This one really worked for me. Hope you'll enjoy it too if you'll give it a try.

[Lau ♡ · Rating 5 out of 5]

California, 1976. After years spent living for surfing, James has to win this last competition to finally have the chance to go pro. He doesn’t expect the current Billabong Pipeline Masters Champion, Danny Moore, to appear out of nowhere, shattering his dreams into pieces. On top of that, the guy seems to live up to the common knowledge of being a dick. Until Danny does something that leaves James wondering who the hell he is…


Sydney Danny Moore is used to people talking about him. Gossips about how it was discovered that he is gay and all the sinful things he has seen doing are people’s favorite. They are all idiots. Sydney’s not good at talking to people, so he doesn’t even try. He’ll just destroy them on the water. Until his eyes find James’... and time stops.


I cannot remember a MM standalone that made me feel as much as this book did. I don’t know what the author put in those pages, but I’ve never felt this high. Never had I gathered my things and skipped all the classes I had left because I simply could not wait. I spent all day reading this painfully slow, urging my brain to memorize every single word, every single feeling. I had to stop every chapter to catch my breath, relax for a moment, because every cell of my body was captivated by the story.


The Sea Ain’t Mine Alone is not going to be for everyone. But what book is? The author takes his sweet time to explain every exchange, lingering in the character’s feelings and the struggles behind each action. Instead of boring me, it only made me feel that I was reading something that had actually happened.


The writing was astonishing. Lyrical, yet direct enough to not steal focus from the message. Every word was a punch on my heart, I couldn’t stop feeling. The dialogues, even when they argue, felt oddly realistic: mature, flawed and aimed to make you fall. I can only think of one book that made me feel this way: Aristotles and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, which is a contemporary masterpiece. That’s how good the storytelling was.


James Campbell
Another James Canning from California who steals my heart.

“And then there’s surfing () It’s just you and the earth. It's just that. It doesn’t mean anything for other people, do anything for anyone. Not even a team sport. It’s just..selfish. But I still do it. I swim out there, and I don’t make any decisions, and I just float around on some wood for a couple hours every day instead of actually doing something with my life. And you know what?” [James] clears his throat as his voice threatens to break, then powers through. “I don’t feel any age at all when I’m surfing. Nothing. I just feel like I’m alive.”


‘Go to war,’ they said. ‘It will be like a vacation, and you’ll return with enough money to pay for college,’ they said. James would have rather not have returned. He killed someone. He still wishes they had let him die on that beach too. He only has a friend, Rob, whom he’s in love with, and thinks James is good enough to go pro. People like him don’t go pro, as Danny Moore’s presence has confirmed him. Only that Moore is determined to show him he could not only go pro, he could win. The boy is a mystery: he doesn’t fit the stories they told about him. Arrogant he is, but also passionate about everything he cares about. And he’s gay. Like him. Even if James is too afraid to point that out.


James' character was handled with so much care. The author didn’t hesitate to show how his inner demons were affecting his confidence and his surfing, as Danny didn’t hesitate to do everything he could to give James exactly what he needed. When they started talking, it was like a collision; James soft and kind, Danny all sharp confidence. I loved how the author was able to make those two very different personalities start to fit, piece by piece, until they were one.


Sydney Danny Moore

“If only our champion wasn’t a miserable asshole.” “If only our champion didn’t think he was God’s gift to surfing and actually knew how to make friends.” “If only our champion wasn’t such a fag.”
() [Sydney] hates that he woke up when he was fifteen with a dream to be the best surfer in the world, and all he’s managed to do since then is piss off an entire island and create a worldwide reputation for himself as “that dude we wish would just lose.”


Kicked out of his home when he was a teen for being gay, Danny is used to being alone. He has no friends, no family, only the sea he worships. He has a heart too big for the real world, so he masks it behind his sunglasses and arrogance. Until he sees James, and his heart stops. He knows he can’t look at other guys, he can’t let gossip spread faster, but James approaches him, introduces himself to him despite everything he must have heard about him, despite Danny being there means his chance of winning has sunk. And he’s a goner.


I’m someone who hates ‘love at first sight’, but here I let it slip because it was more like attraction at first sight for both. James is still in love with Rob and Danny is only starting the fall. I loved how they were opposites in some things and so alike in others, how Danny was the only one able to read James and push all his buttons to make him angry, but also make him realize he could do much more, that he was much more. Danny was younger by ten years, but he was the confident one, the one ready to protect James every time memories of the war created clouds on his eyes. I loved how Danny never got anxious about a race, yet he was a mess every time James was the one surfing. Danny was so carefree giving his love to James, it was only fair James gave love back to him.


“What’s so funny?”
James wipes a hand over his grin and leans his elbow on the open window. “Nothing, just. Of course you taught yourself how to be the top surfer in Hawaii.”
Sydney scoffs. “I’m not the top surfer in Hawaii.”
“Oh what, are you getting humble on me now, Moore?”
“Of course not. Don’t be an idiot. I’m not the top surfer in Hawaii-I’m the top surfer.”
And James laughs again, free and open into the clean air. The sound of it fills Sydney with a tingling warmth.


There was barely any action aside from surf competitions. I’m not into surfing so I don’t know how accurate the information was-maybe that’s why I loved it so much. It was the perfect setting if you love the sea as much as me.


Overall, The Sea Ain’t Mine Alone is one of those books where you don’t have to think about the rating because your heart has identified it as a new all time favorite that will never disappear from your memory. I loved it and I hated it because I’ve been in a reading slump since I finished it and it has raised the bar too high for future MM romances. But I mainly adored it with all my heart. I’d highly recommend it if you are looking for a more lyrical, slower romance that can break your heart but also put it back together again.


“I’m not sure what the hell I did to deserve you.”
“I’m not sure either, because you can be a fucking asshole sometimes. () Now stop doubting me. I’m a fucking decade older than you, I know what I’m choosing here.”


thank you so so much, Lila for recommending this book!💛

[moonlight ☾ [semi-hiatus] · Rating 5 out of 5]

He turns to James. ❝James, before you say goodbye to your old life as one man, and welcome your new life as sky, is there anything you want to say to Sydney?❞
❝You saved me,❞ he says, throat tight. ❝And I love you.❞

this was a beautiful story. i loved both mcs (james & sydney), the romance, the side characters, the lyrical poetic writing, the setting. everything about this was so sweet and beautiful. 🥺🤍

[Papie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved James and Sydney so much. Loved the surfing. Loved the beaches. The writing. The beauty of it all. The historical context. Loved the side characters, especially Rob. Loved the romance. Beautiful romantic writing. I thought it would be a 5 star read.

But. 538 pages are a lot of pages full of romantic writing. So many words.

Not much happens in the book. They meet. They surf. The surf some more. They become friends. They surf. They fall in love. They have sex. They say I love you. They surf. They live in a little beach hut in paradise.

So many pages. It could have easily been half. So I got frustrated and I skimmed. A lot. I mean, reading through a sex scene took more time than actually having sex with my husband. Good sex, no just a quickie. Sometimes the guys stopped in the middle of sex, and started talking or doing something else. WHO HAS TIME FOR THAT?

So 3 stars. But 5 stars for the couple.

[Karla · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75**

There was something special and sweet about this story. There was so much that I loved like how it’s set on the late 70’s in the beautiful beaches of SoCal and Hawaii. The MCs James and Danny are surfers and there’s an age gap between them. Their relationship was played out beautifully even though it was heartbreaking at times since it was a time where they couldn’t be open about their relationship with each other. But it every touch, every look, every kiss made it more profound and these men deserved to have that after all they both had been through in their pasts.

Having said what I loved now let me say what made me give this my rating and why it wasn’t a total winner for ME. I’ve never minded when a book is long if it’s holds my interest but, with this one the length didn’t work. At times it seemed to drag, too much inner thoughts, I dare say maybe too wordy. I think if the chapters would of been shorter and it had less inner thoughts this book could of been a five star or close to it because the writing was beautiful even lyrical. Regardless though I still enjoyed it and I’m glad I read it. ❤️

**thanks dear Dia for putting this on my book radar.**

[Ash&#x1f349; · Rating 5 out of 5]

[Re-read: 14th March 2021]
Yes I did in fact re-read this two days after finishing it. I wasn’t ready to move on yet and wanted more Sydney and James so a re-read was my only option 😂


[Review: 9th March 2021]

I wish I had to words to try and explain how incredible this book was, but I don’t think I could do it justice. You just have to read it for yourself and experience all it has to offer.

This is a book that makes you want to believe in love, to believe that the incredible kind of love between James and Sydney really does exist in the world, and that if you’re lucky you too might be able to experience something like it.

This book is written in such a way that I felt like I was living through the emotions of the characters, which is my favourite kind of reading experience. The authors words buried their way into my heart and left me feeling raw and emotional in a way so few books can do.

I’ve read a ton of romances, but I don’t think any love story I’ve ever read can compare to this. I think the setting has a big factor in this, due to the fact that it’s set in the 70’s where there were no LGBTQ+ rights, and people were heavily discriminated on based on their sexuality. Which meant Sydney kept himself away from people and the awful things they said about him, and James believed he’d never have the privilege to love a man and would have to settle for marrying a woman so he wouldn’t be alone rest of his life. It added a heightened emotion to all of James and Sydney’s interactions with more tension, fear, and doubt. But this also made their love more precious and cherished. I wanted to cry for them so much, both sad and happy tears.

I honestly can’t wait to read this book again some day. It was very long, just under 600 pages on my kindle, but I never wanted it to end. It was a wonderful read and I think anyone who enjoys reading about love would appreciate this book as much as I did.

[Alisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book absolutely consumed me for well over a week. If I wasn’t reading it, I was thinking about it. When I wasn’t doing either of those things, I was listening to 70’s music and watching 70’s surfing videos on YouTube.

The story starts in 1976 in Southern California. James is recently back from Vietnam with nothing to show for it except a big bullet scar and a bunch of depression. He doesn’t have any family and only has a couple of friends. The only thing he’s living for is surfing and his friend Rob.

At a competition he meets Sidney, a infamous surfer from Oahu, Hawaii. Infamous partly because he appears to think he’s better than everyone else and even more so because he’s gay. James is fascinated with the younger man and a series of events lead them in to a romance.

What follows is both a love story and a look at the damage homophobia did to men of that generation. It’s a story with some sadness but also a lot of hope. Things are not easy for them. They want love like everyone else but don’t know how to achieve that. They don’t even know what it looks like. James especially really struggles with his internal shame and fears. It’s a bit angsty at first and my emotions were all over the place. (My Grinch heart even cried twice)

The author has a unique writing style & it was so gorgeous and poetic in places. Her sense of place was amazing. I felt like I was on the beach and in the water with them. Part of the book was a love story to the ocean and that spoke to me on a personal level. I spent every day in college on the beaches of So Cal and I’ve spent a decent amount of time on Oahu and at the North Shore. As I read I felt like I was there again and I so strongly identified with James & Sidney’s love of the sea. (Sidney’s house is a dream of mine). At one point Sydney says something about how the view of the ocean should get old but never does and I felt that in my soul.

The book was not without flaws. I felt it was too long and some chapters/events went on too long. Another review mentioned this was originally on a fanfic site and told in pieces which made sense for how the book read. IMO it should have gone through an edit before being released as a book. BUT, with that said, I found myself not caring. I over looked my niggles because their love story was just so damned beautiful. Also, the story felt so fresh and unique. Lately I feel like I’m just reading the same general stuff over and over again and this stood out so much. It made me remember why I love reading. How certain stories speak to you.

I don’t reread much but I’m sure I’ll pick this one up again and again. I’ll definitely want to spend more time with James and Sydney, they went right to top of favorite couples list. (And if I’m being honest, I’m a little in love with Sydney myself 😍).

Trigger warning for: Depression, discussion of suicidal ideation, war flash backs, homophobia

[Annery · Rating 5 out of 5]

***4.75***

I've been debating whether to recommend reading this slowly, sip by sip, or dive in the deep end and binge. That you should read it goes without saying. This may be C.L. Beaumont's debut novel but judging by the quality of the writing you wouldn't know it.

Everything about this book appealed to me. The bulk of it takes place during two months in 1976, in California and Hawaii, but to me it felt epic.

James 'Jimmy' Campbell: "He's thirty-two living like he's twenty with no plans, no direction, a chain of dog tags in his sock drawer and a cheap surfboard taking up half his tiny studio.
James came back from the Vietnam War just one more of the young men chewed up and spat back into society. He has no family to speak of and if it weren't for the sea, surfing, and a group of rag tag surfers around the Southern California beaches he might not be long for this world. At a surf competition in Hermosa Beach his life intersects with Danny Moore (Sydney to James, as Jimmy is James to Sydney) and nothing will be the same.

Sydney is ten years James's junior but he's also an old soul. He's already legendary in surfing circles, having won tournament after tournament but he isn't well liked. Sydney has a bluntness in dealing with things and people that borders on rudeness and I suspect that if the story were set in the present he'd probably be on the Aspergers spectrum. Sydney is also known to be gay.

Sydney and James meet and after an initial brief dance of push & pull are inexorably drawn to each other despite or because of their differences.

The things I loved about this story are many:
* The historical time setting. The mid-70s are this limbo period in American history, like a long hangover letting us get over the whirlwind of the 60s and a breather before the frenetic 80s.
* The characters are not the stock characters trotted out in so many current romances
* The writing is beautiful and almost elegiac
* The cover is gorgeous
* If you love the sea this book is for you. If you're a surfing fan you'll be in heaven.

But my favorite thing was the story itself, two men discovering themselves and a way to exist in the world when they don't even know how to speak about love, much less a love that is at best ignored or at worst penalized by society. I loved how the author didn't get anachronistic and kept the characters true to their time and place. James knows he's attracted to men, has known for a while, yet he's never uttered the word gay. Doesn't think he fits the picture society paints. Sydney is perhaps a bit more advanced as far as vocabulary and acceptance of self but other than some furtive back alley blow jobs has very little practical experience. The gay world of San Francisco might as well be on the moon and the characters behave according to their lived reality. That was so refreshing. However the heart of the story lives in how once they meet and acknowledge their attraction James and Sydney are consumed by each other. They're each other's first for so many things and my heart beat with them for each small enormous leap.

I was going to post a bunch of my highlights but that seemed obnoxious. 😈

I'm not doing 5 ⭐️ because I do think the story could benefit by a bit of a trim in length. It would tighten the emotional spell it conjures.

[Daniel · Rating 2 out of 5]

1 ⭐ for the first half ... 3 ⭐s for the second half. This is wonderful 125 page story with two endearing main characters. Unfortunately, it's buried under 400+ extra pages of words ... saying the same thing over and over, with seemingly endless inner monologue/overthinking. They literally stopped smack in the middle of one of their first sexual scenes to rehash heartbreaking moments from their past ... again! Way to kill the mood! 🙄🤦‍♂️😖 The actual story got a bit better in the second half but still WAY too dragged out. If this hadn't been a "buddy read", I'd have bailed around the 1/4 mark. Life's too short to have to wade through 400 extra pages to dig out the story.

[ivanareadsalot · Rating 5 out of 5]

My heart is overflowing 😭💙 I haven't read a romance this beautiful in a very long time, and I'm just speechless by how gorgeously crafted this book was! 🏄 🌊 🏄🏽 I am a huge fan of surfing, so in between reading I got caught up watching wsl vids aaaaand subsequently freaking myself out by watching bw surfers take on jaws, even though (banzai) pipeline is oahu ns and jaws is maui nc 🙈 regardless, I feel like I was given an immense gift, witnessing true love in paradise within the pages of this gem of a book. 💞💖 🌺 I would love to give this book a million trillion stars ✨, so instead, as the ultimate rec from a mostly kindle reader, the physical copy is on its way 💘🥰

[Bizzy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have very mixed feelings about this book, and feel more frustrated by it than any other book in recent memory. This review turned out to be very long so I’ll put my conclusion up front: Beaumont shows a lot of promise as an author and this book had a number of positive elements that created a reading experience unlike many other romances. However, when converting this story from fanfic to an original work, the author should have done much more to ensure this work could stand on its own, or should have disclosed to readers that this is fanfic with the names changed so they can read it with appropriate expectations. The failure to properly adapt the work, coupled with some other problems, overshadowed my enjoyment of the parts that were done well. I gave this book 3/5 stars because I don’t know what else to do with it.

My full review:

This book is Sherlock fanfiction with the names changed (confirmed via the author’s Tumblr). If I’d known that from the beginning, I wouldn’t have read it because I strongly dislike Moffat’s Sherlock and actively avoid books with the awkward/asshole savant trope.

Conceptually, I don't have an issue with authors reworking fanfiction to publish as standalone works, but because fanfiction and original fiction have very different author-reader and author-reader-character relationships, authors have to do more than simply change the character names before publishing. In fanfiction, authors not only can but must rely on what audiences already know about the characters, both for better and worse. On the positive side, authors can skip certain elements of character building and move directly to the aspects of the characters and relationships not already addressed by the existing canon. But on the negative side, authors are also constrained by the canon and must give their characters certain key traits regardless of how much sense those traits make in the work's setting. Starting with established characters also means that the setting and events of the story have to be adjusted to fit the characters rather than allowing the characters and plot to mutually influence one another and develop together.

When readers know from the beginning that they’re reading fanfic, none of these things are problems. They know what to expect and the author can write accordingly. But when the reader thinks they’re reading an original work, these issues can be distracting to the reader, diminish their enjoyment, and sometimes cause the work to fail entirely.

To its credit, it isn’t obvious at first that The Sea Ain’t Mine Alone is rewritten fanfiction. Beaumont does an excellent job establishing a vivid setting, introducing the characters, and establishing their dynamic. By far the best part of the book was the slow, careful way that Sydney and James develop their friendship, feeling each other out and revealing their true selves piece by piece. Their initial attraction doesn’t eclipse their many reasons to be hesitant with one another, nor does it prevent them from frequently misunderstanding each other at first. Their early confrontations and conflicts feel very real and are a welcome change of pace from the common romance trope where attraction mystically creates deep understanding without much work by the characters.

Unfortunately, the book started to fall apart for me after this, for three main reasons.

First, Sydney is given savant-level understanding of the math and physics behind waves (and also of electronics, though this is less relevant to the plot). We’re told this knowledge is what allowed him to become the best surfer in the world by the age of nineteen despite never seeing the ocean before age fifteen. He’s contrasted against other surfers who only think about the “basic size and speed” of waves and therefore can’t predict the ocean the way he can. The problem is, this is complete nonsense. The things Sydney knows and intuits about the ocean are things that any long-time surfer - and certainly any professional surfer - not only can do, but must do in order to succeed. Moreover, you can’t use math to predict wave formation to the extent depicted in the book. There’s a reason why the big wave competitions at places like Waimea Bay and Mavericks can only be scheduled in a broad window: the formation of big waves depends on myriad factors including weather patterns much further out at sea, and can’t be predicted very far in advance.

I was perplexed by this characterization but not overly bothered by it when I thought this was original fiction by a debut author. The derisive thoughts about other surfers’ knowledge came solely from Sydney’s POV so I thought perhaps the author meant only to reflect Sydney’s perspective of himself and his difficulty relating to others. And of course, Realism Level: Romance Novel is a thing, and I’ve ignored much bigger inaccuracies for the sake of a good story before. Similarly, the author’s choice to have Sydney repeatedly deduce very specific things about James using at times specious logic was confusing and didn’t add anything to the story, but wasn’t overly bothersome either.

My feelings changed completely when I realized these traits weren’t in the story because the author thought they made sense for Sydney Moore and the story being told in the book, but because they’re required elements of Moffat’s version of Sherlock. The reader really is supposed to be wowed by Sydney’s special super genius skills even though they make no sense either on a logical level or for the character as written in this book. Any time the reader spends trying to figure out how those traits fit in with the larger story is wasted, because there was never an intention to make them fit; they’re just a reference to an existing canon, inserted because they were mandatory.

The second reason the book fell apart for me after the first 30% or so is because the author made no attempt to accurately portray 70s surf culture and I’m skeptical that they did much research at all. The 60s and 70s were a time of huge changes in surfing: surfers from around the world collaborated to completely change surfboard design and create the shortboards that enable the type of surfing described in this book; the (still ongoing) debate about whether competition had any place in surfing was raging and various professional organizations were rising and falling; the counterculture influences on surf culture were at odds with a push for more mainstream acceptance; and so on. Surfing was (and still is) an international sport and community. And, most crucially for this book, native Hawaiians played a major role in the development of surf culture and competition (and still do).

The book touches on absolutely none of this. Now, I’m fine with Realism Level: Romance Novel so I wasn’t expecting a history textbook here. But the decision to portray the other pro surfers in the book as a bunch of generic meathead jocks was frustrating from the outset because there were much more interesting choices that could have been made. My frustration grew exponentially when I realized that it was done because it was the easiest way to make Sherlock - I mean Sydney - an outcast loner who didn’t fit into the scene in large part because of his awkward/asshole savant nature, which was another mandatory element for a Sherlock fic. (I won’t even get started on the claim that Oahu is a “small island” and rumors about Sydney were therefore inescapable there, even though Oahu’s population in 1970 was 800,000 people, the vast majority of whom lived in the metropolitan area where Sydney would have gone to high school.)

The biggest problem, by far, with the portrayal of surf culture in this book is the treatment of native Hawaiians. Native Hawaiians should feature heavily in a story where half of the book is about surfing on Oahu. Just as one example, the big wave surfing competition in Waimea Bay (which was actually founded in the 1980s) is named after a native Hawaiian whose family are the caretakers of Waimea Valley. Instead of doing anything at all to acknowledge the importance of native Hawaiians to surfing, the book whitewashes the sport. There are two native Hawaiians who appear on page (neither of whom surfs), and in both cases, their ethnicity is mentioned solely to allow them to dispense ~*native wisdom*~ to the white MCs. The native Hawaiian who appears in the epilogue is an especially egregious use of the mystical indigenous person trope because dispensing wisdom is literally his only function.

Also, I don’t think it’s asking too much for authors to do basic research even for a romance novel. They don’t need to be experts on the sport or profession they portray, but they should at least get basic terminology right. So I have a hard time forgiving the author for calling the Pipeline Masters the Billabong, when Billabong did not begin sponsoring that competition until 2007 (thirty years after the events in the book!) - a fact which is in the very first paragraph of the Wikipedia article about the event. On its own this might be a tiny footnote in my review, but coupled with the overall laziness of the adaptation of this fanfic into an original work, it’s grating.

The final major problem I had with this book was the narrative style. It’s written in first-person-present POV and every event is accompanied by many paragraphs (and sometimes pages) describing the characters’ emotional reactions. Not many of these feelings are mundane; most often, the feelings described are significant and life-changing. That plus the present-tense POV means the reader has little time to sit with the events on the page and develop their own feelings about them and is never allowed to intuit from the characters’ actions how they feel. Thus, these long descriptions of deep feelings start out as moving and impactful but lose their impact as the book goes on, because the emotional level of the story never fluctuates. After the tenth time a character has realized “for the very first time” some version of “things are different now,” nothing stands out anymore. This is a shame because Beaumont is excellent at creating poignant moments and making the reader feel deeply for the characters. I wish these moments had been doled out more sparingly.

Relatedly, the characters spend so much time thinking about their feelings for each other that relatively little time is devoted to how they feel about themselves. We’re told numerous times that James is depressed and struggles with suicidal ideation. But I never felt like I connected with this aspect of his character because we don’t see those struggles first-hand. This plus James’s declaration that meeting Sydney eliminated his suicidal thoughts - an extremely harmful trope that I’m no longer willing to excuse - made the PTSD/depression aspect of the story a failure for me, although I do give Beaumont significant credit for avoiding some of the worst PTSD tropes commonly seen in popular media.

Similarly, we learn later in the book that James has longed for physical intimacy with men but never experienced it. The revelation is quite moving, but we only see it from Sydney’s POV and never get to hear James’s own thoughts on this topic, which detracts from the impact the revelation should have had on the reader. These issues were probably less noticeable in the original fanfic because of what readers already knew about the characters from the canon and fandom. In an original work, however, these omissions are a problem.

Other minor quibbles:

- The characters constantly think about each other by their full name, which feels unnatural and doesn’t make sense outside of the fic context, where the characters’ last names have a bunch of existing baggage attached to them that the author is trying to evoke

- Benedict Cumberbatch’s hair is not exciting enough to warrant mentioning Sydney’s “curls” seemingly every other page

- The characters moan or “almost moan” a frankly unsettling number of times

- I wish I could unsee the fanart of this book

[Kaje Harper · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jimmy is a returned Vietnam vet who hides both the scars of his injury and the darkness in his head that sometimes makes him stand at the edge of the sea and think about just paddling out. At his lowest moment back on American soil, a stranger came by and said "Hey, you surf?" and became his best friend. Surfing is the thing that gives him space to let go, to live, to feel sunlight and salt and water, to feel real. Doing it together with Rob is what keeps Jimmy breathing.

He knows he has a crush on his wonderful best friend, except being gay is something he can barely think about let alone say. Plus Rob has the loveliest girlfriend ever, a woman Jimmy adores as much as he can any woman. They keep him from being completely alone, and yet the ache of holding back, not touching, not speaking, almost drowns him. Then one day at a competition, he sees a strange man on the pier, and their eyes meet. Nothing will be the same again.

Danny's a champion surfer, brilliant, analytical, a man who can analyze a wave, a person, or a broken toaster and tell you all about it, and be right, over and over. He's also known to be gay, admired and shunned in equal measure by his fellow surfers. They'd tell you about his arrogance, the mirror shades he wears, the way he doesn't socialize, and how you better not bend over in front of him. Behind the shades, Danny is a boy thrown out at fifteen for being gay, and the life he's battled to achieve is brilliant, and empty.

This book is slow, lyrical, intense - the story of two men finding their way forward at a time when being gay was finally legal, but still deeply stigmatized. Jimmy barely has words for who he is or what he feels, let alone the courage to move forward openly. Danny has a lot of losses and hurts to make him cautious. Both men love surfing, and in that common passion they can find a meeting place that isn't risky. But Danny's a decade younger and at the top of a career, Jimmy's just getting into the big competitions; Danny lives in Hawaii, Jimmy lives and works in LA. And admitting he's gay might cost Jimmy his friendship with Rob and Lori- the only people who care about him.

There are a hundred things that have to happen for these men to be together, and past and present aren't going to make it easy.

I really got caught up in this story. There is a fair bit of surfing, but it was well done for a non-surfer like me, clear, engaging and exciting. I really felt for both of these men, and the difficulties and doubts they had. Their slow, slow coming together was believable. The writing style felt a bit drawn out and overwrought toward the end, but not enough to spoil my pleasure in the story. There are some good secondary characters too, and emotional back-stories. If you enjoy emotional stories set in that era, with a sports theme, this is a very good one.

[Claudie ☾ · Rating 5 out of 5]

A couple of sentences in, I was hopelessly hooked, and I knew I would fall in love with this one.

"The love affair began with salt.

Thick salt. The kind that coated shivering skin in chalky warmth and crusted like splintering glass in between tiny strands of hair, seeking the water, seeking the sun, seeking the froth.

Salt that crackled across his tongue and burned in the corners of his tear ducts. That whipped through the valleys of his pruny fingertips and nestled thickly in the thin hair on his arms, the tiny crevices of his big toe nails, the hidden curve just behind his ear. That dried and slithered in shrinking flakes across the skin of his forearms under the baking sun."

Beaumont's writing is lyrical, emotive — just stunningly beautiful. It's hard to believe this is a debut novel. Just check these out, oh my god…

"The endless blue stretches out in front of him, a question and an answer all at once."

"[…] the great vast blue, a deep velvet glass cupping the earth in its wet palms and beckoning James out to its depths with the soft, rolling, even crush of the waves against the shore."

I loved James and Sydney (aka Danny) and their wonderful story. It flowed like the ocean itself, calm and soothing one minute, stormy and unpredictable the next. It just felt right for these two beautiful, hurting souls to finally find each other...

I know I already went completely crazy with the quotes, but I promise this is the last one! 🙈

"The breath is stolen from his lungs as Danny’s hand suddenly rises from the water, palm placed firmly right down over the scar on James’ chest. James freezes. Danny’s hand doesn’t flinch.

“James,” he says, in a voice that cracks over the word. A voice that pounds within James’ own chest. Danny’s thumb strokes once across his skin. “You were brave,” he says again.

James tries to breathe properly under the feeling of Danny’s palm on his chest, covering the most intimate part of his skin, willingly touching the haunted darkness etched forever into his body. He trembles beneath the weight of it, afraid to look Danny in the eyes. He feels deep down that when he does, he will be stripped bare. No longer able to conceal any of his needs or thoughts, not even from himself."

If you’re looking for a feel-good read that’s more (way more) than just a sweet ball of fluff, this is the book to check out. It turned out to be exactly what I needed to take my mind off of some things. Even now, I still feel calm and relaxed. Rejuvenated, like I’ve just come back from a long tropical vacation where I’d done nothing but lounge on beautiful private beaches and enjoy the view, a favorite drink in hand.



Go and read this. You will thank me later.

[Miki_reads · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Don’t you dare not come back to me”

You can all stop looking because this is peak romance right here. It took me so long to get a grip and write a review for this, but LORD, DO I LOVE THEM. This is one of those books where two lonely broken people find their soul mate, and holy shit did it have me giggling, screaming, and sobbing.

The sea aint mine alone is set in the 70s. James Campbell is a Vietnam veteran suffering from PTSD and reignites his love of surfing to cope. Sydney Daniel Moore was outted at a young age and is the biggest name in competitive surfing. What starts out as a combative relationship turns into one of the most subtly beautiful love stories I've read in a really long time. Everything seems to be working against them, and they still make it their mission to find a way.

Also, special shout out to Rob. The only man in this story worth a damn outside the MMCs bc that man had me a BASKETCASE.

If you don't mind slower detail oriented stories that make your heart bleed from both pining and complete sweetness, then this is the one. I will think about this for a long ass time. I have under 10 true 5 stars this year, and this is one of them. FUCKING STUNNING FR 🥹🥹🥹🥹

I will never know love like this. THE EPITOME OF ROMANCE IS SYDNEY AND JAMES

[Marci]

Calling it quits at 17%

[Layla · Rating 3 out of 5]

Omg I'm finally done reading this book.
*insert "It's been 84 years" gif here*

RTC

Ok so the review....
I wanted to love this book more than I did. It had all the makings of a great book for me: Angst, hurt/comfort, beautiful writing. Don't get me wrong, it had all of these things, but...

BUT

This book was LOOOOOONG. And it didn't have to be this long.
Coming from a person who has read Tal Bauer's Whisper, which is an almost 800 page book, that's saying something.
The thing is, this book didn't have to be so long, because when you look carefully, nothing really happens. It's pages and pages of nothing happening 🥲
They surf, they talk about surfing, they talk about other things, they have internal monologues... and that's it.

They even stop sex to talk. Who does that 😳

Also the thing with saying their full names all the time got on my nerves.

And, the insta-love situation is kinda OTT. They meet, they surf, they are attracted to each other, they hookup, they move in together in a space of 2 months, while also being in the same place for a handful of times. I didn't undertsand or believe their love story.

The steam... so they have blowjobs, hand jobs, kissing.... ok fine it was sweet and sexy.
Now the anal? It happens twice and not on page. Allow me to explain. The first time anal happens it's a fantasy. Danny is narrating what him bottoming for James would be like.
The second time, it's James remembering how he bottomed for Danny the night before.
Why? Why didn't we experience their anal scenes, especially since James is a gay virgin in all ways?
This irked me.

Truthfully, the three stars is for the beautiful writing only.

[Savanna Rhodes · Rating 5 out of 5]

No offense, but James Campbell and Sydney Moore are the only two people who have ever been in love. Ever.

This was an atmospheric, meaningful, unique, beautiful story that actually sells you on the idea that these two are a pair of star-crossed-lovers. It will also desperately make you want to catch the next flight to Hawaii. Five stars!

[Amina · Rating 3 out of 5]

✰ 2.75 stars ✰

​​​“​So, genius, is there anything you can’t take one look​ at and know fucking everything about?”

“You.​​”

​

​ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ I thought the beginning was beautifully written. 🤌🏻 The opening sentence alone is enough to draw the reader in, this encompassing feeling that you're on the cusp of a love so profound and deep that it'll be worth wading through the open sea to find it. And when young prodigy champion swimmer twenty-two-year old Sydney Moore and old washed out vet thirty-two-year old James Campbell do collide in their first surfing tournament, I felt that heat sparkling between the two.​ 🥹 I liked how the author slowly revealed shades of their past and personalities, allowing us to see the glimpses of the lives they've lived before their paths crossed - what shaped them to be where they were today. I was really on board.​ 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

“​You infuriate me​.” ​

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ It was an instant connection upon first sight, fueled by their traitorous hearts yearning for more, driven by their passion for riding the open waves, and then reaching for each other in an intimate way that catches them both off guard, but one that they both desperately longed for. It was emotional, and it was heartwarming. ​This is insane.​ 💟 Despite James' own inhibitions, Sydney drew out the bravest man on earth to finally say they wanted him - cheered him on to face his fears and storm the sea to become the surfing champion he believed him to be - challenging him, provoking him, proving to him that he is capable of the feats that he fears himself to achieve. For he is still trying in vain to rid himself of the haunting horrors that the Vietnam War left him with, Sydney was a soothing and surprising balm that soothed that painful part of his heart.​ ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

“​... that he could probably spend the rest of his life naming emotions and still never name each one he’s experienced since the moment he first locked eyes with him.”

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ Not to say that Sydney is not without his own inner demons, broken wayward soul that he is fierce and awkward and ridiculous and terrifying and charming, he's at one with the sea - a genius uru that guides James through the torrential storms and weathers his emotional thunders. Despite their age difference, the pull is electric and defining - 'the man now before him is the endless sea, open and rolling and surrounding James so thoroughly' - the current drowning them in their desires. 🥺​ The way she highlights the feeling of The Sea Aint Mine Alone - the comfort they both sought with one another - in the water and on land - the easy truths that spill forth - the yearning and cravings - the very definition of resolute confirmation that it is not just a fleeting infatuation. The author makes sure to remind us just how much their romance is mutual - fierce - intense - longing - and sincere.​ 🤍

“​He can’t decide whether he’s lost a part of himself or gained something more.”

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ​​Perhaps ​that is where the fault lay​ - that the author felt this insane compulsion to have each expressive thought and emotion ad infinitum. 😮‍💨​ The story became stagnant in their physical and sexual explorations deepened, but made my attention span wan and my interest drift away. Their aching and treacherous feelings no longer captivated me, rather the reiterating of said confessions and internal dialogue over and over and over again - in such a roundabout way - was tedious to the point of boredom and for an excruciatingly long and tiresome read. ​ Maybe it was intentional; a way to show how the two of them were in such a state of disbelief - the giddy shock of finding someone who loved them as they were. So the author felt the need to repeat it continuously​ - almost as if to reaffirm to themselves what was happening to be true.​ 🫩

“​Just . . . you were a fucking stranger to me a month ago. A terrifying stranger. And now you’re . . . you’re my entire life.”

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ​​I can't be too critical of the swiftness in which their love story progressed; one night stands have moved mountains faster than their two weeks whirlwind romance did moving from rivals to friends to lovers to soulmates. And it is 1976 - being queer or gay - immediate demand for being reviled and ridiculed. 😥​ So both of their innate fears of being found out - was palpable and true. But, once they got together at the Billabong competition - their relationship was just so squeamish in sentimentality, it became exhaustive to read. I found myself skimming the internal monologue, because they had just said the same thing literally a page ago! 😩🤦🏻‍♀️ I was able to recite ​exactly​ what they were going to say, when they were just thinking it! I appreciated that it pushed James to resolve his lingering feelings for Rob, and it was nice to see Sydney gain closure for his own personal demons - I do. But, just the way the writing collapsed right after they acted upon their attraction just burned out whatever spark it was that drew me to their spark in the first place. 😞

[Cyndi (hiatus) · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars, but I'm rounding down because there were too many times when I wanted the book to just end already. Flowery language has it's place, but this story was drowning in it and there wasn't enough action or dialogue to balance it out. The page count could have been cut in half without losing any magic, just a lot of words. I hate saying such a beautifully written love story was a slog for me at times, but it really was. This author is obviously a very gifted writer. If I were a reader inclined to highlight poignant moments or thought provoking sentiments, I would have been grabbing something from nearly every page. But there is such a thing as too much of a good thing and the overabundant prose in this novel definitely had a purple tinge to it. Oftentimes it caused scenes to completely stall to the point where I was lost when they finally picked back up again. I felt a near desperate need to skim at times, but the completist in me wouldn't let me do it and it became very frustrating.

Overabundance of words and prose aside, the love story was really heartwarming. Both Sydney and James had their own individual trauma to deal with. James was a Vietnam veteran suffering from all the things you'd imagine - PTSD, depression, suicidal ideation, survivor's remorse and probably other conditions that I don't want to mislabel by accident. Sydney had been outed when he was 15 and kicked out of his house as a result. Even though he never publicly confirmed his sexuality, it was assumed that he was gay and he became an outcast in the surfing world, even though he was the best surfer in the circuit. The solitude both of these men relegated themselves to was truly heartbreaking. Their loneliness was almost as painful as the fact that they'd been made to feel like they deserved it. So when they met and began spending time together, their feelings grew cautiously. The author did a fantastic job of portraying the careful way they fell in love.

There was a lot of surfing in this book. I wasn't sure how I'd feel about that, but I found it all super interesting. I know nothing about surfing so I have no idea how accurate the descriptions of the competitions or the actual act of surfing were, but I was riveted when Sydney and James were in the water and terrified each time they hopped onto their boards. I loved that the surfing scenes weren't only in the perspective of the person doing it. I can imagine that a sport like that would be more scary for the crowd than the actual person barreling through the waves, so I enjoyed getting both the nerves of the onlooker and the adrenaline of the surfer.

My opinion of this book is that if someone were to take a comb and run it through the pages, working out the knots and tangles, this would have easily been a 5 star read for me. The bones were there. I loved the characters when they were allowed to interact outside of their wordy inner monologues. I loved the story when it wasn't bogged down with flowery details and repetitive backstory. And the novella length epilogue that I went into with a sense of dread actually became my favorite part of the entire book and moved me to tears a few times. Overall, this book was lovely and worth reading, but it might take a little patience to see it through.

[Robert · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a 2.5-3 star read for me. A very, VERY descriptive writing style that I don’t particularly enjoy.

[Kathleen in Oslo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Re-read Sept 2023 and I didn't think I could love this book more, but I did.

This is not a perfect book. There are certain words and phrases and images that recur over and over. There are some distracting typos. It could have used another line edit or two. The pace is stately. Some high-tension moments, mostly surfing-related, whizz by in a couple of paragraphs or pages; other moments, mostly intimate, are lingered over at great length. I can see how some people get 50 pages in and dnf out of boredom or annoyance at these two stuck, stubborn men as they tentatively, warily circle each other. This is not a perfect book.

But damn if it isn't perfect for me.

CL Beaumont blew my socks off with Names For The Dawn, and while these are two very different books, they are both incredibly immersive, interior, intimate, angsty stories about the fumbling, frightening path towards loving and living truly. James and Sydney are two flawed, brave men whose journey will stay with me, and whose on-page story culminates in the most beautiful, moving epilogue I've ever read.

I devoured this on vacation, on a sweltering beach, listening to the waves and the seagulls and smelling the suncream and fried food and feeling the salt and sand and sweat on my skin. And I'll probably re-read this on some cold, dark Norwegian night, enfolded in and seeking comfort from the gorgeous images and sense of place that Beaumont creates. And it will be equally perfect each time.

Loved it.

[MJ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved it so much I didn't want it to finish. 😭 I don't know how it is possible that this book passed so unnoticed but please, LISTEN TO ME! GO READ IT! One of the most beautiful book I came across in the last two years, an immediate favorite. I can't recommend it enough. 😭💞💞💞💞

It takes place in 1976 and it features:
- sport (surf)
- rivals to lovers (but this isn't stretched)
- protagonists with their own demons
- age-gap
- beautiful settings
- strong plot
- realistic relationships (with the fears and the problems that came during those years)

❤️

[Cristina · Rating 3 out of 5]

* 3.5 stars *

The Sea Ain't Mine Alone by C.L. Beaumont was an interesting read, with two beautiful main characters, a fascinating setting and some truly moving parts. It was also, however, a somewhat frustrating read that left me with the distinct feeling that within its 500 pages lurks an amazing novel that is squashed under excessive verbosity and a lack of strict editing.

Set in the late 1970s between California and Hawaii in the circuit of professional surfers, the novel brings together James Campbell, a Vietnam War veteran suffering from PTSD, and Danny Moore, a surfer whose skills and fame are only equalled by the dislike people have towards him.

The book follows the rival-to-lovers trajectory of the two characters while they both try to come to terms with their own traumatic experiences and the author is very capable in constructing them as a sort of split characters with a public face behind which they hide their real personalities and hidden fears. It's intriguing then, how they both have double names that mark the distinction between public and private personas. James is traumatised, on the verge of giving up on life but hides his fragility behind the friendly and easy-going Jimmy. In a similar manner, Sydney - who may be smart and quick-witted but also insecure and terrified of human contact - masks his true self under the public façade of the unpleasant and arrogant Danny Moore. The way the two MCs negotiate with these different aspects of their lives is what really intrigued me in this novel.

Another plus was the choice of location and time setting - the world of surfing is completely alien to me but I found it fascinating and characterised very nicely. I also liked the contrast between James' military past and the way he tries to hide it from the other surfers, and by extension from the countercultural and Flower Power feeling that permeated this particular section of youth culture in the late 1970s. The short parts set in Vietnam were sufficiently nightmarish and brutal to be effective.

I do find, however, that some parts of the novel could have been further edited to make the reading more streamlined and powerful. I can see how the writer wanted to infuse her debut book with a literary overtone that would alternate events and internal monologues, facts and intimate musings, but I don't think her attempt was always successful. Some sections ended up being repetitive and over-indulgent and, in a few instances, ruined by crass lines of dialogues or bizarre imagery that seemed completely out of place in a novel that is otherwise slow, meditative and generally elegant.

There are aspects in The Sea Ain't Mine Alone that would warrant for me a 5-star rating, others that would be lower than that. That's why I'd like to set on an overall of 3.5 stars.



Banzai Pipeline, Oahu, Hawaii, 1977

[Carol (§CoverLoverGirl§) · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Sea Ain’t Mine Alone - C L. Beaumont

This is like a full length novel set around the mid 1970. I’ve not read this author before but they must be surfers or else did a helluva lot of research into Competitive Surfing and the sea conditions around the islands of Hawaii.

I can’t even swim so I felt a bit lost with all the details at times so be prepared.

James 30 ish, is a Vet who served in the Navy during the Vietnam War. After traumatic incident and his escape he is injured, physically and mentally. He always loved surfing near his home when growing up. Not knowing his father at all, it was just himself and his hard working Mom who adored him. He was still very young when she was killed in a car accident.

Sydney, aka Danny, came from a Military family, his father was in the Air Force. He was a very strict, religious man and expected his family to follow his will. After his parents divorce and his father remarries, when Sydney is 14, somehow Sydney’s secret is exposed and his possessions are dumped in plastic bags on doorstep and he is kicked out of his Home.

In later years Sydney is a big name in Surfing circles in Hawaii and California. Although he is shunned and nasty stories spread about him because he is gay, he just ignores them. He is a very solitary man now in his early 20’s.

The lives of both of these men change forever when they come to the line up on a beach to compete in the Billabong Surfing Competition.

I loved both Sydney and James. The emotional connection between them was powerful. but the latter being a bit of a ‘negative Nellie’ annoyed me a little bit. But he sure had his reasons.

Maybe the story could have been a bit shorter by leaving out some of the descriptions surfing jargon, conditions etc. apart from that there is a beautiful part in this story but I won’t add anything more as I might spoil it.

WARNING- Triggers re PTSD in relation to VETS.