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Crossings: A Bald Asian American Latter-day Saint Woman Scholar's Ventures Through Life, Death, Cancer, and Motherhood
In this collection of personal essays, letters, and even drawings, Melissa Inouye considers how Latter-day Saints in an increasingly globalized Church might cultivate unity without leaving their distinctive gifts behind. As an Asian American Latter-day Saint feminist and scholar, she feels the urgency of the Lord's command that the Church be one (Doctrine and Covenants 38:27). With her unique mix of humor and candor, empathy and idealism, Inouye draws upon her academic training in Chinese history and religious studies, her rich cultural heritage, her experiences raising a family in an international setting, her tangle with cancer, and her resilient faith in the gospel of Jesus Christ to unfurl vibrant reflections on the enduring question of what it means to be a Latter-day Saint today.
288 pages, Paperback
Published June 10, 2019
53 people are currently reading
665 people want to read
About the author
Melissa Wei-Tsing Inouye
7 books36 followersMelissa Wei-Tsing Inouye is a senior lecturer in Asian studies at the University of Auckland. She received her PhD in Chinese history from Harvard University. Dr. Inouye's research includes the history of Chinese Christianity, moral ideology in modern China, global charismatic religious movements, and women and religion. Her book China and the True Jesus: Charisma and Organization in a Chinese Christian Church was published by Oxford University Press in January 2019.
A member of the advisory board of the Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship at Brigham Young University, Dr. Inouye is committed to the mutually reinforcing relationship between faith and learning. Her writings on Latter-day Saint life and faith have been published online and in print in Patheos, the Washington Post, Meridian Magazine, Square Two, and the Ensign. She and her husband, Joseph, have four noisy and joyful children, botanically nicknamed Bean, Sprout, Leaf, and Shoot.
A member of the advisory board of the Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Scholarship at Brigham Young University, Dr. Inouye is committed to the mutually reinforcing relationship between faith and learning. Her writings on Latter-day Saint life and faith have been published online and in print in Patheos, the Washington Post, Meridian Magazine, Square Two, and the Ensign. She and her husband, Joseph, have four noisy and joyful children, botanically nicknamed Bean, Sprout, Leaf, and Shoot.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 135 reviews
February 28, 2020
Oh my gosh, I am beside myself that I get to be the first Goodreads review for this incredible book!
I had the privilege of hearing Melissa Inouye, Adam Miller, and Neylan McBaine present Melissa's book just a couple days ago. I immediately bought the book and devoured it. It is delightful, profound, energizing, and heart wrenching. It leaves me with newfound perspective and questions I suspect will take a loooong time to answer.
As someone who has recently left my church, I found it challenging yet so worthwhile to read Melissa's compelling reasons for staying in the Church. She gets the issues, but she writes about them in a way that enables the Maxwell Institute and Deseret Book to put their names on her book. I could (and will) give this out to orthodox friends, and I bet they would think this is terrific apology work. At the same time, I could (and will) give this to friends who have left, and I suspect they might be gratified to find their concerns validated in sincere, respectful, and vulnerable ways.
At first I thought Melissa's approach to staying seemed pretty pragmatic. Forget the troublesome history and truth claims, she says without saying, and focus instead on the interplay between Church, God, and your own life's fruit. Church, she argues, is a pan that allows us to cook delicious food. Does the fact that the pan has dents--and toxins!!--matter when it's enabling you to cook stir fry? Would you rather be eating your stir fry out of an equally dented, toxic pan that's not already your own? Or would you rather eat it raw??
But as the book progressed, I realized her approach is not just pragmatic. It's also transcendent. Melissa writes that she has found God in the Church, and the effect of her metaphors, anecdotes, essays, and letters is glimmering transcendence. It's clear she has found God in the Church. And she makes such a great case that the reader probably can too.
Finally, Melissa includes some of her Christmas letters in these books. At the panel she explained that she did this at the insistence of one of her friends, and the publishers liked the idea. The Christmas letters were enchanting. I found myself feeling jealous of every person lucky enough to be on Melissa's Christmas letter list--and then I realized I should just be grateful that she wrote this book and included the letters so I can read them even though I'm not on the list!
I feel lucky and blessed to have this beautiful book percolating in my mind and heart.
I had the privilege of hearing Melissa Inouye, Adam Miller, and Neylan McBaine present Melissa's book just a couple days ago. I immediately bought the book and devoured it. It is delightful, profound, energizing, and heart wrenching. It leaves me with newfound perspective and questions I suspect will take a loooong time to answer.
As someone who has recently left my church, I found it challenging yet so worthwhile to read Melissa's compelling reasons for staying in the Church. She gets the issues, but she writes about them in a way that enables the Maxwell Institute and Deseret Book to put their names on her book. I could (and will) give this out to orthodox friends, and I bet they would think this is terrific apology work. At the same time, I could (and will) give this to friends who have left, and I suspect they might be gratified to find their concerns validated in sincere, respectful, and vulnerable ways.
At first I thought Melissa's approach to staying seemed pretty pragmatic. Forget the troublesome history and truth claims, she says without saying, and focus instead on the interplay between Church, God, and your own life's fruit. Church, she argues, is a pan that allows us to cook delicious food. Does the fact that the pan has dents--and toxins!!--matter when it's enabling you to cook stir fry? Would you rather be eating your stir fry out of an equally dented, toxic pan that's not already your own? Or would you rather eat it raw??
But as the book progressed, I realized her approach is not just pragmatic. It's also transcendent. Melissa writes that she has found God in the Church, and the effect of her metaphors, anecdotes, essays, and letters is glimmering transcendence. It's clear she has found God in the Church. And she makes such a great case that the reader probably can too.
Finally, Melissa includes some of her Christmas letters in these books. At the panel she explained that she did this at the insistence of one of her friends, and the publishers liked the idea. The Christmas letters were enchanting. I found myself feeling jealous of every person lucky enough to be on Melissa's Christmas letter list--and then I realized I should just be grateful that she wrote this book and included the letters so I can read them even though I'm not on the list!
I feel lucky and blessed to have this beautiful book percolating in my mind and heart.
August 21, 2019
I want to give this book to everyone I know.
July 16, 2019
Inouye writes beautifully, communicating grand ideas with surprising ease and humility. This collection of writings, ranging from yearly newsletters, to letters to her children, to theological arguments, to college lectures, likewise are addressed to a spectrum of readers: children, family, friends, students, colleagues, strangers, would-be adversaries, those wavering in their faith. With such a variety, I would have expected little coherence, but the common element (and most compelling reason for me to award this pearl of great price with the highest rating I can give) is that it is evident that over the time and spaces that she composed this book, she treats all of her readers with great respect and love, as if they were all equals. She doesn’t “write down” to her children, doesn’t wag her finger at critics, nor does she aim to bedazzle the intelligentsia. All throughout, I felt that she wrote from a union of heart and mind - no easy task, but something that I aspire to in my practice.
Thank you, Melissa, for this treasure.
Thank you, Melissa, for this treasure.
August 28, 2024
Fantastic - I loved her insights. I liked the pairing of her essays on faith with annual newsletters, letters to her kids and students, etc. And reading this after her death added another layer of meaning to her words. Highly recommend!
March 26, 2022
I enjoyed the first half of this book: it was thoughtful, wonderfully written, and touchingly personal.
The second half was profound in a way that changed me. There was one letter in particular (“Rotten Things Rotten, Good Things Good”) that she wrote to a woman who was struggling with the church, and it could have been written directly to me. I pretended it was, and let it heal some wounds that had been hurting so much in recent months that I was at a breaking point with the church. I’ll maybe always wrestle with my faith, but it felt like a tender blessing for this particular time, and I welcome this current peace. Somehow these books—and these wonderful people who write them—seem to come when I need them most.
A few favorite quotes
“When I think about the meaning of life and people who live the life I want to live, I see that they are not just "correct," or "right," but good. I think it is more challenging to be good than it is to be correct, or right, or even righteous. All those things (correctness, rightness, righteousness) can be cultivated within a single self-contained ideological system. But to be good, I believe, one must grapple with realities and problems that thrust themselves upon us, that intrude into our native spheres of thinking and being. Our vertical and horizontal church structures are engineered to force this kind of negotiation upon us.”
“I don't care about people thinking I'm not righteous enough. At the end of each day, I check in with God. I say, "Thank you for this wonderful day. I hope you like what I did with it."
“As we know from our religious practice, believers are not merely consumers of religion, but also producers of it. We don't just attend church. We do church, prepare church, teach church, interpret church, create church, are the Church. It's your church too. What will you do with it?”
“Very few things are all good and not bad, or the other way around. Everything is mixed up together. Human endeavors, including human communities, are by nature full of contradictions, because contradiction is the nature of reality itself. Being able to take complexity in stride is a prerequisite for becoming a person who is really useful in today's world.
Polarizing, demonizing characterizations are bad for the world. Therefore, amidst the world's contradictions, amidst wheat and chaff, be cultivators and builders. Use the ideas, skills, and understanding that you've acquired to constantly rethink assumptions, recognize truth, pursue things of real value, build bridges, and in so doing open yourself and your generation up to the vastness of human inheritance.”
The second half was profound in a way that changed me. There was one letter in particular (“Rotten Things Rotten, Good Things Good”) that she wrote to a woman who was struggling with the church, and it could have been written directly to me. I pretended it was, and let it heal some wounds that had been hurting so much in recent months that I was at a breaking point with the church. I’ll maybe always wrestle with my faith, but it felt like a tender blessing for this particular time, and I welcome this current peace. Somehow these books—and these wonderful people who write them—seem to come when I need them most.
A few favorite quotes
“When I think about the meaning of life and people who live the life I want to live, I see that they are not just "correct," or "right," but good. I think it is more challenging to be good than it is to be correct, or right, or even righteous. All those things (correctness, rightness, righteousness) can be cultivated within a single self-contained ideological system. But to be good, I believe, one must grapple with realities and problems that thrust themselves upon us, that intrude into our native spheres of thinking and being. Our vertical and horizontal church structures are engineered to force this kind of negotiation upon us.”
“I don't care about people thinking I'm not righteous enough. At the end of each day, I check in with God. I say, "Thank you for this wonderful day. I hope you like what I did with it."
“As we know from our religious practice, believers are not merely consumers of religion, but also producers of it. We don't just attend church. We do church, prepare church, teach church, interpret church, create church, are the Church. It's your church too. What will you do with it?”
“Very few things are all good and not bad, or the other way around. Everything is mixed up together. Human endeavors, including human communities, are by nature full of contradictions, because contradiction is the nature of reality itself. Being able to take complexity in stride is a prerequisite for becoming a person who is really useful in today's world.
Polarizing, demonizing characterizations are bad for the world. Therefore, amidst the world's contradictions, amidst wheat and chaff, be cultivators and builders. Use the ideas, skills, and understanding that you've acquired to constantly rethink assumptions, recognize truth, pursue things of real value, build bridges, and in so doing open yourself and your generation up to the vastness of human inheritance.”
May 1, 2020
I loved this book. It made me think of my mother, another LDS Scholar who faced cancer twice and was 1-1. Her advice on motherhood, service, a desire for a life away from Provo and yet spiritual roots of the the strongest and most unwavering strength inspire me. I can't recommend this book more. I do say it is odd and it took me 3.5 months to read 250 pages, so why is that? It is both cerebral and quirky and is about running. I love being in a blended second chance (non-ideal) family and having mixed race step-children. I just learned that 20+ some generations ago we (Webber's with like 92% British DNA) had Chinese ancestors. So I am as much Chinese as Elizabeth Warren is Indian. I love being apart of this huge messy Christ-Centered church, no matter how much I mess up. And I want all my kids to read this.
July 18, 2019
I wasn’t sure at first that I was a fan of the format of the book but by the end, it worked very well for me. What won me over was Inouye’s authenticity and uncommon wisdom. This is full of important insight and offers some of the most frank and thoughtful gems regarding the biggest challenges facing the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints today.
September 12, 2019
I loved this book. It is an interesting mix of letters to her young children, holiday letters to friends and family, talks to her students comparing Chinese history to life, and her musings on illness and death, faith and family. Her experiences living in other countries as a missionary, a student, a professor and a mother are fascinating. I love her brilliant brain, sense of humor, provocative questions and powerful testimony. Her children go by their botanical nicknames: Bean, Sprout, Leaf & Shoot!
Some favorite quotes:
"I've gained a deeper appreciation for how Latter-day Saint beliefs, practices, people, and institutions created a religious system based on compelling ideas and organized in a powerful way. I see how people at church learn Christianity not only through prayer and study of the scriptures, but through continuous opportunities to yield, serve, and express gratitude."
"Because it is rooted in history, institutions and human beings, all too often in the Church we find apples that are rotten. When you encounter rotten fruit, follow the example of the lord of the vineyard in Jacob 5 and refuse to accept it. When you encounter institutional processes that systemically let rotten fruit into the kitchen, or chuck good fruit into the rubbish, please help us find a better way. It's true that being a Latter-day Saint can be a lot of work. Please consider your tremendous power to lead us where we need to go. You are the future of our Church. You are what we may become. You may find that God will consecrate these struggles for your good and for ours. As a people, where would be be without fearless questions and fierce will to press on toward Zion, over bogs and rivers and mountains?" (a response to a friend's questioning teenager)
"When I think about the meaning of life and people who live the life I want to live, I see that they are not just "correct" or "right", but good. I think it is more challenging to be good than it is to be correct, or right or even righteous . . . . But to be good, I believe one must grapple with realities and problems that thrust themselves upon us, that intrude into our native spheres of thinking and being. Our vertical and horizontal church structures are engineered to force this kind of negotiation upon us."
"A strenuous life as a Latter-day Saint builds our capacity to be strong, useful and kind. In the accounts in the scriptures, the Savior himself seems to have always chosen the path of greatest resistance. He ministered to the poor, the Others, the ugly, the foul, and those whose commitment to follow him wavered because they were full of fear."
"Our culture of communitarianism and consecration means that the Latter-day Saints are stuck with each other, in the same chaotic global kitchen, forever. This is a very confronting way to experience diversity, but it does provide regular opportunities to take the Savior up on his challenges to be meek, show mercy, make peace, give to those in need, seek reconciliation and forgiveness, and look for the beams in our own eyes. Encountering deep, multifaceted differences at church has helped make me a more versatile and useful person in the wider world, with all its fragmentation and complexity. On this score, the Latter-day Saints really have something unique to offer. We are small and weird enough to be serious about all working together in the same world kitchen. It's highly problematic, but also super cool."
"Our past history has taught us what it means to make crossings, over prairies, rivers, mountains, jungles and seas. Future challenges will test whether we are able to make similar crossings, over cultures, languages, racial divides, national borders, worldviews and time. A gospel that is true is a gospel that will withstand and adapt to such rigorous tests. The question is whether we will be courageous and hardy enough to undertake the new treks the gospel requires. With all my heart, I pray that we will. Shoulders to the wheel!"
Some favorite quotes:
"I've gained a deeper appreciation for how Latter-day Saint beliefs, practices, people, and institutions created a religious system based on compelling ideas and organized in a powerful way. I see how people at church learn Christianity not only through prayer and study of the scriptures, but through continuous opportunities to yield, serve, and express gratitude."
"Because it is rooted in history, institutions and human beings, all too often in the Church we find apples that are rotten. When you encounter rotten fruit, follow the example of the lord of the vineyard in Jacob 5 and refuse to accept it. When you encounter institutional processes that systemically let rotten fruit into the kitchen, or chuck good fruit into the rubbish, please help us find a better way. It's true that being a Latter-day Saint can be a lot of work. Please consider your tremendous power to lead us where we need to go. You are the future of our Church. You are what we may become. You may find that God will consecrate these struggles for your good and for ours. As a people, where would be be without fearless questions and fierce will to press on toward Zion, over bogs and rivers and mountains?" (a response to a friend's questioning teenager)
"When I think about the meaning of life and people who live the life I want to live, I see that they are not just "correct" or "right", but good. I think it is more challenging to be good than it is to be correct, or right or even righteous . . . . But to be good, I believe one must grapple with realities and problems that thrust themselves upon us, that intrude into our native spheres of thinking and being. Our vertical and horizontal church structures are engineered to force this kind of negotiation upon us."
"A strenuous life as a Latter-day Saint builds our capacity to be strong, useful and kind. In the accounts in the scriptures, the Savior himself seems to have always chosen the path of greatest resistance. He ministered to the poor, the Others, the ugly, the foul, and those whose commitment to follow him wavered because they were full of fear."
"Our culture of communitarianism and consecration means that the Latter-day Saints are stuck with each other, in the same chaotic global kitchen, forever. This is a very confronting way to experience diversity, but it does provide regular opportunities to take the Savior up on his challenges to be meek, show mercy, make peace, give to those in need, seek reconciliation and forgiveness, and look for the beams in our own eyes. Encountering deep, multifaceted differences at church has helped make me a more versatile and useful person in the wider world, with all its fragmentation and complexity. On this score, the Latter-day Saints really have something unique to offer. We are small and weird enough to be serious about all working together in the same world kitchen. It's highly problematic, but also super cool."
"Our past history has taught us what it means to make crossings, over prairies, rivers, mountains, jungles and seas. Future challenges will test whether we are able to make similar crossings, over cultures, languages, racial divides, national borders, worldviews and time. A gospel that is true is a gospel that will withstand and adapt to such rigorous tests. The question is whether we will be courageous and hardy enough to undertake the new treks the gospel requires. With all my heart, I pray that we will. Shoulders to the wheel!"
December 9, 2022
8/10. I really, really loved this book. So much of her perspective on life and living as a Latter-day Saint while also holding space for hope in societal and organizational change really resonated with me. At the same time, her lived experience is very different from mine and it was evident in the family newsletters included throughout the book that much of what she finds normal I would find alien. But if anything, this was more encouraging and made me appreciate even more the solidarity that I found in this book, because if someone with such different experiences from me can have many of the same concerns and fears and still stay, then those feelings are real and I'm not alone in that.
I especially loved the final essay, on fear and bearing burdens and the pain of living and loving people, despite the grace and comfort Christ brings. Every word of it resonated very deeply with me, especially in light of experiences I've had recently that have brought me to confront those questions of how we are to bear each other's burdens when our own feel so heavy, and what Jesus means when he says to love your neighbor. That essay felt too short, haha. I would have enjoyed a greater focus on those questions throughout the book.
Maybe it was insensitive to hope for this, but frankly I expected to read more of her uncertainty and fear in dealing with cancer. Sometimes the way those experiences were presented felt a little overly optimistic to me, or maybe that's just my own cynicism telling me nobody's actually that positive when faced with a potentially terminal diagnosis. And in fairness, the goal of the book was to leave behind a collection of writings for her children to give them a glimpse of how she saw the world and what she hoped they would learn from her, and I'm sure she presented things as being easier than they were. I can't imagine you'd want to dive too deeply into the grim details of cancer in a memoir directed to your children.
I also loved the essay on faith and staying in the church despite its shortcomings and pitfalls. It was well written and compassionate, effectively acknowledging problems without disregarding the good that comes from our faith. I was inspired by it.
Overall it was genuine, funny, well-written and thought provoking. I marked it down slightly in my rating for the occasionally overly sunny presentation (again, not necessarily a flaw, it just meant it didn't quite resonate with me) and for being too short, because I want to hear more of what Melissa thinks about life, haha.
I especially loved the final essay, on fear and bearing burdens and the pain of living and loving people, despite the grace and comfort Christ brings. Every word of it resonated very deeply with me, especially in light of experiences I've had recently that have brought me to confront those questions of how we are to bear each other's burdens when our own feel so heavy, and what Jesus means when he says to love your neighbor. That essay felt too short, haha. I would have enjoyed a greater focus on those questions throughout the book.
Maybe it was insensitive to hope for this, but frankly I expected to read more of her uncertainty and fear in dealing with cancer. Sometimes the way those experiences were presented felt a little overly optimistic to me, or maybe that's just my own cynicism telling me nobody's actually that positive when faced with a potentially terminal diagnosis. And in fairness, the goal of the book was to leave behind a collection of writings for her children to give them a glimpse of how she saw the world and what she hoped they would learn from her, and I'm sure she presented things as being easier than they were. I can't imagine you'd want to dive too deeply into the grim details of cancer in a memoir directed to your children.
I also loved the essay on faith and staying in the church despite its shortcomings and pitfalls. It was well written and compassionate, effectively acknowledging problems without disregarding the good that comes from our faith. I was inspired by it.
Overall it was genuine, funny, well-written and thought provoking. I marked it down slightly in my rating for the occasionally overly sunny presentation (again, not necessarily a flaw, it just meant it didn't quite resonate with me) and for being too short, because I want to hear more of what Melissa thinks about life, haha.
September 11, 2019
So refreshing. The author lives such an authentic and complicated life with regard to family, culture, and especially faith. I don't necessarily agree with everything she writes, but you get the feeling that if you sat down and chatted with her she would respect you all the more for your authentic disagreeing. I think I resonated most with her descriptions of growing up with amateur music instruction, with her hilarious family Christmas newsletters, and with her complex take on faith and the church. I hope I can be courageous as she describes to meet people where they are in their faith in spite of disagreement and to push back against racism, sexism, homophobia, American-centering, etc. She has such a fun way of appreciating the warts, the weirdness and complexity of the church, while trying to distill the key benefits she holds onto in the church. I would totally want to be friends with her and her family.
Also, I loved her interview on the Mormon land podcast, got me to read this.
Also, I loved her interview on the Mormon land podcast, got me to read this.
November 15, 2020
I'd like to think Melissa and I would be friends, we are the same age, share a religious faith, are mothers, have both had cancer and hair loss, love to hike, and sing alto. This book at times was difficult to read, because my fears from being forced to face my own mortality are raw and real, and Melissa's are so similar. This book is a compilation of her own thoughts and convictions, and one I definitely found compelling.
September 29, 2020
I found this compilation of letters, lectures, and essays to be food for my mind and soul!
Inouye's writing is insightful as well as beautiful. She tackles some difficult and potentially divisive issues with thought, tact, and compassion. She also illustrates the joy that can be found in everyday life. I will certainly be returning to her words.
Alison's Summer Reading 33/35 (Even though I finished after summer had ended.)
Inouye's writing is insightful as well as beautiful. She tackles some difficult and potentially divisive issues with thought, tact, and compassion. She also illustrates the joy that can be found in everyday life. I will certainly be returning to her words.
Alison's Summer Reading 33/35 (Even though I finished after summer had ended.)
August 26, 2019
This is an interesting compilation of essays, family Christmas letters, and other thoughts by Melissa Inouye, a Latter-day Saint scholar, wife, and mother who researches religion and Chinese history. She has lived many places and experienced many things, including cancer. I appreciate her realness. She makes some good points about difficult issues. I most appreciate her faith through challenges.
Some quotes I liked:
"I've been poor among the rich and rich among the poor. Wherever I go, it seems, I don't quite fit in, which is why I feel equally at home everywhere (p 2)."
"I can't prescribe a life for anybody, but what I can do is share how I have found the fruit of this life to be worthwhile--costly, to be sure, but also rich and nourishing, a source of deep joy.... The purpose of life is to come to terms with the depth of this alienation in ourselves and in others and respond with charity--to seek, receive, and share the pure love of Christ so that we may be one amidst our differences (p 3)."
"Fix-it work isn't very glamorous, but it is the work of prophets, disciples, and Christ himself... The work of the gospel is to connect or reconnect people with each other. Often we come to the edge of vast divides that separate us from our fellow beings. But the discomfort we feel at the margins provokes growth and empathy. Christ suffered all things, many of them alien to his previous lived experience, in order to develop the capacity to heal others in their suffering. Having been a stranger, one is prepared to recognize other strangers and take them in... All of us can and should find ourselves, and Christ, at the margins (p 4)."
"Not all of my family's long journeys were chosen (p 5)."
"Religious traditions are at one point or another built upon certain claims or assumptions that go beyond the scope of critical reasoning (p 9)."
"I find my basic assumptions unchanged from what they were in Primary: God is real, and we are children of God (p 10)."
"It is through relationships with others, particularly those we behold on the other side of a large divide, that Jesus Christ calls on us to demonstrate faith in the first and second great commandments (p 11)."
"Love is the power that allows you to be useful to others (p 16)."
"Suddenly I imagined all the lives being lived around me: on my right and on my left, to the front and to the rear, here in China and off in America, begun many years before me, and continuing long after. How small I am, I thought all of a sudden. How young and small and far away (p 23)."
"'I suppose there aren't many shortcuts to spirituality. Lopping off lobes of your brain is a bad way to get simple faith. Maybe it's all a process of time, and doing things (p 27).'"
"University study had taught me that important things were not simple but complicated. They needed to be analyzed, figured out (p 34)."
"Did she just want to argue with us? Was she lonely? What did she hope for (p 35)?"
"Around 10:20 every night, the humid skies around Taiwan began to hum as missionaries all over the island knelt beside their beds and poured out their hearts in silent prayer. Their supplications rushed heavenward through the muggy night, up through the roofs of the apartment buildings and past the smoggy, low-hanging stars. They race on through the part of the sky that was cool and clear, and high above the earth the eternal One who comprehends all tongues and hears all petitions listened and answered in softness (p 36)."
"I knew I would have to figure this out, but at the same time I didn't want to. I feared there was a zero-sum contest between my religious truth and 'everybody else's truth.' What if the Church lost? And then what could I believe, and who would I be (p 39)?"
"How can someone who is supposed to be representing Jesus Christ to the world fail to take care of the person right in front of her, in need of love and support? I decided that of all things, being a disciple of Christ, and not racking up high statistics, should be the measure of my success as a missionary. As I rode my bike...I repeated in my head a scripture from Psalms: 'Create in me a clean heart, O Lord; and renew a right spirit within me (p 42).'"
"Religions are more than just stories and doctrines... Religion includes what people do (p 47)."
"I believe in the patterns and the commandments set forth in the scriptures. I have witnessed the Spirit working in people's lives, giving them words of comfort and blessing, expanding their capacity to be humble and generous, transforming enemies into friends (p 49)."
"My experiences have led me to treasure the fruits of the restored gospel as rare and valuable (p 49)."
"Too bad you can't remember today. It was a beautiful morning...made all the more beautiful because of the two gloomy days of rain that preceded it.... I hope you're a good bean (and that I don't mess you up) (p 58)."
"I certainly hope you don't expect all parts of the scriptures to be uplifting. They're not meant to be a bunch of warm fuzzy stories. Rather they are a record of human beings' dealings with God, their covenants with God, and their attempts to live up to these covenants (p 63)."
"Some things lie within our control... and some things lie outside our control. Regarding what which we ourselves cannot control, God will sometimes help us... At other times, what happens, happens. There may be some grand design in this, but I don't know (p 66)."
"I wanted to write to affirm my peculiar identity as someone who believes in God, and who is a Latter-day Saint (p 67)."
"To be a Latter-day Saint is to be the kind of Christian who sees salvation as a collective project and doesn't mind things getting a bit grandiose... I have seen the Holy Spirit at work in this Church and in our lives, and know this Spirit will lead us to do good and to be good... as we obey God's commandments, honor our covenants, and live always in thanksgiving, we will meet with joy (p 68)."
"You, my little daughter, are officially four days and one hour old... I lie here thinking about how you came to me (p 69)."
"The best things are achieved or experienced through contrasts. I was so very happy to see you. You were worth all the pain, and because of you, the pain itself has become a deeply meaningful experience (p 71)."
"From time to time, all of us struggle with significant challenges (p 77)."
"One of the ways in which we have become thoroughly initiated into local culture is by sweating through the stressful process of getting our kids into school (p 83)."
"Now that we have four kids, we are discovering all of these interesting sibling combinations (p 85)."
"Life comes to us in equal measures of joy and sorrow (p 86)."
"We went to New Zealand for family life--and for the glowworms (p 97)."
"I try to teach the way I would like to be taught, to value people, to cultivate caring relationships, and to create spaces for meaningful conversations (p 98)."
"Can universal truths be separated from local culture? The Church is wherever the saints strive to follow Christ (p 104)."
"The impulse to sameness stems not just from the church's centralized administration, but most profoundly from our shared faith in the teachings of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. The impulse to diversity stems from our view of Zion as not merely an idea or a belief, but a real community (p 107)."
"As I studied more about church history and about religious history from Buddhism to Pentecostalism, the more I realized that flawed, human elements are an integral part of all major religious movements (p 111)."
"Despite the loftiness of the divine aspirations that have inspired religious movements throughout history, it is the humanness of the project that is both most problematic and most inspiring (p 112)."
"Be honest. Be specific. Be kind. The miracle of Zion's one heart and one mind was not that all members of the community had been born identical, but that they had chosen to love and serve each other despite…their diversity (p 117)."
"Our faith is charismatic... Our faith is organized... Our faith is living (p 118)."
"The power of Christ's love is real, and the reason why people become and remain Latter-day Saints is because they have felt it--through the Holy Spirit, and through people (p 121)."
"'I know who I am... I am a nobody (Boyd K. Packer, p 130).'"
"Elder M. Russell Ballard boldly called on Latter-day Saints to 'eliminate any prejudice, including racism, sexism, and nationalism (p 136).'"
"Our children...are the real investigators at church (p 138)."
"Jesus's radical teachings upended some of these existing moral understandings (p 144)."
"'Don't judge me because I sin differently than you (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, p 145).'"
"While God's commandments and moral standards never change, changing social or institutional circumstances mean that the ways in which people seek to apply God's commandments or live Christlike values do vary (p 154)."
"'They have to depend upon the revelations of God as they come to them. They cannot see the end from the beginning, as the Lord does (George Q. Cannon, p 155).'"
"When leaders and ordinary members alike seek the mind and will of God…God often points them in new directions (p 155)."
"'There have been times when members and leaders in the Church have simply made mistakes... God is perfect'.... [but] God's 'imperfect...people make mistakes (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, p 155).'"
"Our history is the history of God working through humble people, of flawed disciples steadfastly seeking Christ (p 156)."
"Personal revelation...is the lifeblood of the Restoration... 'Regardless of what others may say or do, no one can ever take away a witness borne to your heart and mind about what is true (Russell M. Nelson, p 158).'"
"Because of our mutual weaknesses, we will frequently fail to live up to the sacred name we bear. But if we are humble, and diligent, we will be blessed with a struggle that is unceasing (p 159)."
"We've tried to do what we can, but even if we could do much more it would not be enough. What is to be done? Is there balm in Gilead? Such questions bring us to Jesus Christ, whose atonement gives us the opportunity to keep trying despite our mistakes as we struggle to live up to the full measure of our belief that every human being is the beloved son or daughter of Heavenly Parents, with infinite worth and potential (p 163)."
"When we don't take time to be with people, we can't learn from them, nor they from us. This mutual learning and growth is the whole purpose of life (p 166)."
"It is much easier to use intellectual power for negative purposes (to poke holes in a theory, to bust popular myths, to tear someone down) than for positive purposes (p 167)."
"The world desperately needs people who use their intellectual powers to stitch things together instead of just snip things apart (p 168)."
"'Seek truth from facts (p 172).'"
"Forgiveness is something each of us needs (p 174)."
"It's not for you to decide whether or not you're going to make a contribution to the world. That you will is a given. The question is, which works, words, and values will your life make more permanent in the world (p 176)?"
"The sooner you realize your life will be measured not in terms of 'accomplishments' but in the quality of your relationships with others, the more deliberately you can apply yourself to inhabiting these relationships in a way that lives up to your ideals (p 177)."
"Civilization is what people are. It is the daily work of humans at being humans. It is something we both find within ourselves and borrow from each other. It is something we glean from ordinary encounters with frustration, disappointment, and love (p 181)."
"Our career successes will never erase or obscure our personal failings (p 182)."
"Greetings from the house with the table saw in the living room (p 183)!"
"In the end, the question about the meaning or the significance of one's life comes down not to how it compares with a stranger's life in the distant past or future, but how it connects with the lives of others in the present (p 190)."
"To be candid, it's a difficult time… my mom died of cancer about eight years ago, so I have been through all this before (operation this, lymph nodes that, a scan here and a scan there), with a not-very-encouraging conclusion. As I walk the same path, I can scarcely tell where grief for her ends and fear for myself begins (p 197)."
"Cancer…demands respect (p 198)."
"Death comes to all of us... No one wants to learn wisdom through suffering, but the truth is, this is how it works... ultimately, the point of life is not to have it but to do things with it (p 202)."
"Being young, strong, and...healthy doesn't immunize a person from major difficulties, but it does mean that one can address these difficulties with considerable energy and a good will. With the grace of God, I'll run hard, and I'll run to win (p 213)."
"No one here is perfect, from the youth pianist to the President of the Church. We're all just trying to do a job we've been asked to do, as best we can (p 220)."
"This is what we get at church: other mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, teachers (p 221)."
"'All that we suffer and all that we endure...purifies our hearts...and makes us more tender and charitable (Orson F. Whitney, p 222).'"
"When we exercise control over our body's hungers, we gain power to see the world outside of ourselves (p 223)."
"When we obey commandments, we protect spaces for the sacred in our lives (p 223)."
"Courage is not about being impervious to danger but being alive to it (p 235)."
"I believe in the strength of covenants, and I believe in Christ. I believe that, flawed as we are, we can repent and become better (p 237)."
"We don't just attend church. We do church, prepare church, teach church, interpret church, create church, are the Church (p 239)."
"Latter-day Saint faith is not a spectator sport (p 243)."
"You and I are not called to suffer for the sins of the world. Yet, we are called to follow Christ, to the best of our abilities, for the purpose of finding our heavy burdens made light. How does this work? Can we learn to hold both things in our hands—our love and care for others, and our love and care for ourselves (p 252)?”
“A faith tradition is much more than a discrete set of ideas, beliefs, or even organizational structures. It is deeply rooted in individuals’ daily experiences, a way of life held together by a variety of complex person-to-person interactions (p 256).”
“Now is not the time to ignore our covenants or lose our pioneering spirit. Now is the time to frame up the handcarts and go marching up the hill—some must push, and some must pull (p 258).”
“I have hope, and determined reliance on God’s promises… I will give thanks for each new day (p 259).”
Some quotes I liked:
"I've been poor among the rich and rich among the poor. Wherever I go, it seems, I don't quite fit in, which is why I feel equally at home everywhere (p 2)."
"I can't prescribe a life for anybody, but what I can do is share how I have found the fruit of this life to be worthwhile--costly, to be sure, but also rich and nourishing, a source of deep joy.... The purpose of life is to come to terms with the depth of this alienation in ourselves and in others and respond with charity--to seek, receive, and share the pure love of Christ so that we may be one amidst our differences (p 3)."
"Fix-it work isn't very glamorous, but it is the work of prophets, disciples, and Christ himself... The work of the gospel is to connect or reconnect people with each other. Often we come to the edge of vast divides that separate us from our fellow beings. But the discomfort we feel at the margins provokes growth and empathy. Christ suffered all things, many of them alien to his previous lived experience, in order to develop the capacity to heal others in their suffering. Having been a stranger, one is prepared to recognize other strangers and take them in... All of us can and should find ourselves, and Christ, at the margins (p 4)."
"Not all of my family's long journeys were chosen (p 5)."
"Religious traditions are at one point or another built upon certain claims or assumptions that go beyond the scope of critical reasoning (p 9)."
"I find my basic assumptions unchanged from what they were in Primary: God is real, and we are children of God (p 10)."
"It is through relationships with others, particularly those we behold on the other side of a large divide, that Jesus Christ calls on us to demonstrate faith in the first and second great commandments (p 11)."
"Love is the power that allows you to be useful to others (p 16)."
"Suddenly I imagined all the lives being lived around me: on my right and on my left, to the front and to the rear, here in China and off in America, begun many years before me, and continuing long after. How small I am, I thought all of a sudden. How young and small and far away (p 23)."
"'I suppose there aren't many shortcuts to spirituality. Lopping off lobes of your brain is a bad way to get simple faith. Maybe it's all a process of time, and doing things (p 27).'"
"University study had taught me that important things were not simple but complicated. They needed to be analyzed, figured out (p 34)."
"Did she just want to argue with us? Was she lonely? What did she hope for (p 35)?"
"Around 10:20 every night, the humid skies around Taiwan began to hum as missionaries all over the island knelt beside their beds and poured out their hearts in silent prayer. Their supplications rushed heavenward through the muggy night, up through the roofs of the apartment buildings and past the smoggy, low-hanging stars. They race on through the part of the sky that was cool and clear, and high above the earth the eternal One who comprehends all tongues and hears all petitions listened and answered in softness (p 36)."
"I knew I would have to figure this out, but at the same time I didn't want to. I feared there was a zero-sum contest between my religious truth and 'everybody else's truth.' What if the Church lost? And then what could I believe, and who would I be (p 39)?"
"How can someone who is supposed to be representing Jesus Christ to the world fail to take care of the person right in front of her, in need of love and support? I decided that of all things, being a disciple of Christ, and not racking up high statistics, should be the measure of my success as a missionary. As I rode my bike...I repeated in my head a scripture from Psalms: 'Create in me a clean heart, O Lord; and renew a right spirit within me (p 42).'"
"Religions are more than just stories and doctrines... Religion includes what people do (p 47)."
"I believe in the patterns and the commandments set forth in the scriptures. I have witnessed the Spirit working in people's lives, giving them words of comfort and blessing, expanding their capacity to be humble and generous, transforming enemies into friends (p 49)."
"My experiences have led me to treasure the fruits of the restored gospel as rare and valuable (p 49)."
"Too bad you can't remember today. It was a beautiful morning...made all the more beautiful because of the two gloomy days of rain that preceded it.... I hope you're a good bean (and that I don't mess you up) (p 58)."
"I certainly hope you don't expect all parts of the scriptures to be uplifting. They're not meant to be a bunch of warm fuzzy stories. Rather they are a record of human beings' dealings with God, their covenants with God, and their attempts to live up to these covenants (p 63)."
"Some things lie within our control... and some things lie outside our control. Regarding what which we ourselves cannot control, God will sometimes help us... At other times, what happens, happens. There may be some grand design in this, but I don't know (p 66)."
"I wanted to write to affirm my peculiar identity as someone who believes in God, and who is a Latter-day Saint (p 67)."
"To be a Latter-day Saint is to be the kind of Christian who sees salvation as a collective project and doesn't mind things getting a bit grandiose... I have seen the Holy Spirit at work in this Church and in our lives, and know this Spirit will lead us to do good and to be good... as we obey God's commandments, honor our covenants, and live always in thanksgiving, we will meet with joy (p 68)."
"You, my little daughter, are officially four days and one hour old... I lie here thinking about how you came to me (p 69)."
"The best things are achieved or experienced through contrasts. I was so very happy to see you. You were worth all the pain, and because of you, the pain itself has become a deeply meaningful experience (p 71)."
"From time to time, all of us struggle with significant challenges (p 77)."
"One of the ways in which we have become thoroughly initiated into local culture is by sweating through the stressful process of getting our kids into school (p 83)."
"Now that we have four kids, we are discovering all of these interesting sibling combinations (p 85)."
"Life comes to us in equal measures of joy and sorrow (p 86)."
"We went to New Zealand for family life--and for the glowworms (p 97)."
"I try to teach the way I would like to be taught, to value people, to cultivate caring relationships, and to create spaces for meaningful conversations (p 98)."
"Can universal truths be separated from local culture? The Church is wherever the saints strive to follow Christ (p 104)."
"The impulse to sameness stems not just from the church's centralized administration, but most profoundly from our shared faith in the teachings of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. The impulse to diversity stems from our view of Zion as not merely an idea or a belief, but a real community (p 107)."
"As I studied more about church history and about religious history from Buddhism to Pentecostalism, the more I realized that flawed, human elements are an integral part of all major religious movements (p 111)."
"Despite the loftiness of the divine aspirations that have inspired religious movements throughout history, it is the humanness of the project that is both most problematic and most inspiring (p 112)."
"Be honest. Be specific. Be kind. The miracle of Zion's one heart and one mind was not that all members of the community had been born identical, but that they had chosen to love and serve each other despite…their diversity (p 117)."
"Our faith is charismatic... Our faith is organized... Our faith is living (p 118)."
"The power of Christ's love is real, and the reason why people become and remain Latter-day Saints is because they have felt it--through the Holy Spirit, and through people (p 121)."
"'I know who I am... I am a nobody (Boyd K. Packer, p 130).'"
"Elder M. Russell Ballard boldly called on Latter-day Saints to 'eliminate any prejudice, including racism, sexism, and nationalism (p 136).'"
"Our children...are the real investigators at church (p 138)."
"Jesus's radical teachings upended some of these existing moral understandings (p 144)."
"'Don't judge me because I sin differently than you (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, p 145).'"
"While God's commandments and moral standards never change, changing social or institutional circumstances mean that the ways in which people seek to apply God's commandments or live Christlike values do vary (p 154)."
"'They have to depend upon the revelations of God as they come to them. They cannot see the end from the beginning, as the Lord does (George Q. Cannon, p 155).'"
"When leaders and ordinary members alike seek the mind and will of God…God often points them in new directions (p 155)."
"'There have been times when members and leaders in the Church have simply made mistakes... God is perfect'.... [but] God's 'imperfect...people make mistakes (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, p 155).'"
"Our history is the history of God working through humble people, of flawed disciples steadfastly seeking Christ (p 156)."
"Personal revelation...is the lifeblood of the Restoration... 'Regardless of what others may say or do, no one can ever take away a witness borne to your heart and mind about what is true (Russell M. Nelson, p 158).'"
"Because of our mutual weaknesses, we will frequently fail to live up to the sacred name we bear. But if we are humble, and diligent, we will be blessed with a struggle that is unceasing (p 159)."
"We've tried to do what we can, but even if we could do much more it would not be enough. What is to be done? Is there balm in Gilead? Such questions bring us to Jesus Christ, whose atonement gives us the opportunity to keep trying despite our mistakes as we struggle to live up to the full measure of our belief that every human being is the beloved son or daughter of Heavenly Parents, with infinite worth and potential (p 163)."
"When we don't take time to be with people, we can't learn from them, nor they from us. This mutual learning and growth is the whole purpose of life (p 166)."
"It is much easier to use intellectual power for negative purposes (to poke holes in a theory, to bust popular myths, to tear someone down) than for positive purposes (p 167)."
"The world desperately needs people who use their intellectual powers to stitch things together instead of just snip things apart (p 168)."
"'Seek truth from facts (p 172).'"
"Forgiveness is something each of us needs (p 174)."
"It's not for you to decide whether or not you're going to make a contribution to the world. That you will is a given. The question is, which works, words, and values will your life make more permanent in the world (p 176)?"
"The sooner you realize your life will be measured not in terms of 'accomplishments' but in the quality of your relationships with others, the more deliberately you can apply yourself to inhabiting these relationships in a way that lives up to your ideals (p 177)."
"Civilization is what people are. It is the daily work of humans at being humans. It is something we both find within ourselves and borrow from each other. It is something we glean from ordinary encounters with frustration, disappointment, and love (p 181)."
"Our career successes will never erase or obscure our personal failings (p 182)."
"Greetings from the house with the table saw in the living room (p 183)!"
"In the end, the question about the meaning or the significance of one's life comes down not to how it compares with a stranger's life in the distant past or future, but how it connects with the lives of others in the present (p 190)."
"To be candid, it's a difficult time… my mom died of cancer about eight years ago, so I have been through all this before (operation this, lymph nodes that, a scan here and a scan there), with a not-very-encouraging conclusion. As I walk the same path, I can scarcely tell where grief for her ends and fear for myself begins (p 197)."
"Cancer…demands respect (p 198)."
"Death comes to all of us... No one wants to learn wisdom through suffering, but the truth is, this is how it works... ultimately, the point of life is not to have it but to do things with it (p 202)."
"Being young, strong, and...healthy doesn't immunize a person from major difficulties, but it does mean that one can address these difficulties with considerable energy and a good will. With the grace of God, I'll run hard, and I'll run to win (p 213)."
"No one here is perfect, from the youth pianist to the President of the Church. We're all just trying to do a job we've been asked to do, as best we can (p 220)."
"This is what we get at church: other mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, teachers (p 221)."
"'All that we suffer and all that we endure...purifies our hearts...and makes us more tender and charitable (Orson F. Whitney, p 222).'"
"When we exercise control over our body's hungers, we gain power to see the world outside of ourselves (p 223)."
"When we obey commandments, we protect spaces for the sacred in our lives (p 223)."
"Courage is not about being impervious to danger but being alive to it (p 235)."
"I believe in the strength of covenants, and I believe in Christ. I believe that, flawed as we are, we can repent and become better (p 237)."
"We don't just attend church. We do church, prepare church, teach church, interpret church, create church, are the Church (p 239)."
"Latter-day Saint faith is not a spectator sport (p 243)."
"You and I are not called to suffer for the sins of the world. Yet, we are called to follow Christ, to the best of our abilities, for the purpose of finding our heavy burdens made light. How does this work? Can we learn to hold both things in our hands—our love and care for others, and our love and care for ourselves (p 252)?”
“A faith tradition is much more than a discrete set of ideas, beliefs, or even organizational structures. It is deeply rooted in individuals’ daily experiences, a way of life held together by a variety of complex person-to-person interactions (p 256).”
“Now is not the time to ignore our covenants or lose our pioneering spirit. Now is the time to frame up the handcarts and go marching up the hill—some must push, and some must pull (p 258).”
“I have hope, and determined reliance on God’s promises… I will give thanks for each new day (p 259).”
May 12, 2020
I attended the Mormon Women for Ethical Government conference (online thanks to COVID-19) in March and Melissa was one of the presenters and I was so impressed by her that I bought and read her book, listened to a podcast she was on, and scrolled through her Facebook page. I wish I knew her in person and sure wish we were friends!
I love how she refers to her children botanically as Bean, Sprout, Leaf, and Shoot and her family Christmas letters were some of my favorite parts of the books. I felt my mortality keenly as I read about her fight with cancer and must have said a million prayers asking Heavenly Father to let her beat the cancer and be able to stay to raise her children and continue to bless the world with her knowledge and perspectives.
I think her experiences and perspectives were just what I needed right now. I often feel bombarded by the messages of the world. I feel frustrated at times by the patriarchy in the world and in my church. I have doubts and questions and Melissa helped me to put those aside and focus on all the wonderful things that can bring me closer to Jesus Christ and the gospel. I enjoyed every thing about this book and definitely plan to read it again.
I love how she refers to her children botanically as Bean, Sprout, Leaf, and Shoot and her family Christmas letters were some of my favorite parts of the books. I felt my mortality keenly as I read about her fight with cancer and must have said a million prayers asking Heavenly Father to let her beat the cancer and be able to stay to raise her children and continue to bless the world with her knowledge and perspectives.
I think her experiences and perspectives were just what I needed right now. I often feel bombarded by the messages of the world. I feel frustrated at times by the patriarchy in the world and in my church. I have doubts and questions and Melissa helped me to put those aside and focus on all the wonderful things that can bring me closer to Jesus Christ and the gospel. I enjoyed every thing about this book and definitely plan to read it again.
August 2, 2019
It’s been a long time since I’ve read a book that resonated with me as much as this one. I bought some extra copies to share with friends and family who are local to me, so please hit me up! I want everybody to read this!
The subtitle of the book hints at a lot of the topics Inouye covers in the book, but there’s a whole lot more as well. She shares memories from her childhood, her mission to Taiwan, her work in graduate school and as a professor, her family’s time in Hong Kong as well as Auckland, New Zealand. She also includes several family Christmas letters with the sweetest hand drawn sketch illustrations. She finishes the book with a collection of essays and letters on faith, the lessons she has learned from battling cancer, and her hopes for her children.
There is an urgency in her message, born partly from the fact that she really cares about the things she is sharing, but even more from the fact that her life expectancy has been called into serious question by her recurring cancer diagnosis.
Innoye argues convincingly that in some way or another, we are all on the margins; no one feels like a “normal” member of the church. However, our covenants bind us to each other and to Christ, and the work of figuring out how to be united as Christ’s people is what makes us more like him. She comments on the Americanized culture of the church and how hard it is for American church members to be aware of how their culture is infused within the church.
Here are a few of my favorite excerpts:
“Around 10:20 every night, the humid skies around Taiwan began to hum as missionaries all over the island knelt beside their beds and poured out their hearts in silent prayer. Their supplications rushed heavenward through the muggy night, up through the roofs of the apartment buildings and past the smoggy, low-hanging stars” (36).
“Home is where the stain-remover is” (99).
“Miracles are always as amazing as they first seem” (249).
“While I agree that God does not give us ‘a spirit of fear,’ I do believe that God has made us susceptible to fear for a good reason—namely, to help us experience vulnerability and thereby become humble, sensible, and compassionate. Just a new love opens the door to new fear, new fear opens the door to new love. It’s a two-way street. Feeling our vulnerability, we call on God for strength” (253).
(To her children) “I worry that you will forget my teachings and reject my values. I feel, personally, that I have remembered my parents’ teachings and absorbed my parents’ values. However, I’m aware that I express these teachings and values in ways my parents sometimes don’t recognize. The same thing will probably happen to you and me. I suppose it’s okay, as long as you feel like you know what you’re about and work hard to do all the good you can, in your own way” (254).
The following links will help you learn a little more about Inouye and her ideas:
An interview with Jana Riess about the book: https://religionnews.com/2019/06/28/m...
“Making Zion” a July 2019 address given as part of the Living Faith Lecture series at the Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Studies at BYU. https://mi.byu.edu/video-melissa-inou...
The subtitle of the book hints at a lot of the topics Inouye covers in the book, but there’s a whole lot more as well. She shares memories from her childhood, her mission to Taiwan, her work in graduate school and as a professor, her family’s time in Hong Kong as well as Auckland, New Zealand. She also includes several family Christmas letters with the sweetest hand drawn sketch illustrations. She finishes the book with a collection of essays and letters on faith, the lessons she has learned from battling cancer, and her hopes for her children.
There is an urgency in her message, born partly from the fact that she really cares about the things she is sharing, but even more from the fact that her life expectancy has been called into serious question by her recurring cancer diagnosis.
Innoye argues convincingly that in some way or another, we are all on the margins; no one feels like a “normal” member of the church. However, our covenants bind us to each other and to Christ, and the work of figuring out how to be united as Christ’s people is what makes us more like him. She comments on the Americanized culture of the church and how hard it is for American church members to be aware of how their culture is infused within the church.
Here are a few of my favorite excerpts:
“Around 10:20 every night, the humid skies around Taiwan began to hum as missionaries all over the island knelt beside their beds and poured out their hearts in silent prayer. Their supplications rushed heavenward through the muggy night, up through the roofs of the apartment buildings and past the smoggy, low-hanging stars” (36).
“Home is where the stain-remover is” (99).
“Miracles are always as amazing as they first seem” (249).
“While I agree that God does not give us ‘a spirit of fear,’ I do believe that God has made us susceptible to fear for a good reason—namely, to help us experience vulnerability and thereby become humble, sensible, and compassionate. Just a new love opens the door to new fear, new fear opens the door to new love. It’s a two-way street. Feeling our vulnerability, we call on God for strength” (253).
(To her children) “I worry that you will forget my teachings and reject my values. I feel, personally, that I have remembered my parents’ teachings and absorbed my parents’ values. However, I’m aware that I express these teachings and values in ways my parents sometimes don’t recognize. The same thing will probably happen to you and me. I suppose it’s okay, as long as you feel like you know what you’re about and work hard to do all the good you can, in your own way” (254).
The following links will help you learn a little more about Inouye and her ideas:
An interview with Jana Riess about the book: https://religionnews.com/2019/06/28/m...
“Making Zion” a July 2019 address given as part of the Living Faith Lecture series at the Neal A. Maxwell Institute for Religious Studies at BYU. https://mi.byu.edu/video-melissa-inou...
May 3, 2020
I really enjoyed reading this compilation of Inouye's of essays, letters, and other writings which she compiled into a book at a time where circumstances forced her to contemplate her mortality and what she wanted to leave behind for her children. This type of book always makes we wish I were better at recording my own story, not because it mirrors hers or because it is particularly exceptional, but because I think we all have stories to tell and there is so much to learn from reading and writing them.
Inouye's reflections on the modern-day Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, including ideas about women's place in the church and creating a space which meets the needs and hopes of the rising generation, gave me much food for that. I appreciate both her insight and her humility. It has not erased the questions and ideas I struggle with, but it has given me a new framing with which to approach those struggles. Inouye's book will stick with me for a long time.
Inouye's reflections on the modern-day Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, including ideas about women's place in the church and creating a space which meets the needs and hopes of the rising generation, gave me much food for that. I appreciate both her insight and her humility. It has not erased the questions and ideas I struggle with, but it has given me a new framing with which to approach those struggles. Inouye's book will stick with me for a long time.
September 26, 2019
I genuinely liked it. It was fascinating about her experiences living in other places, especially China where she looked the same, but came from such a different background. I loved her question about the importance of a life and if it’s more important if you live now or hundreds of years ago, if you are famous or a ruler or just a regular person. I loved how she described the strengths and weaknesses of the lay ministry in our congratulations and how even though we make mistakes, the spirit can still bear witness of truth and help us do God’s work, despite our imperfections. I also liked her descriptions of what it’s like to face your mortality and not know how long you’ll be around. It helped bring clarity to what matters.
September 13, 2019
Although, I really loved the parable style teachings in which Melissa shared her story and beliefs but I struggled with the writing style. Because there are so many essays, letters, and short stories, it’s hard to find a narrative to hold it all together. That being said, I greatly valued her perspective, knowledge, and evidence to backup her ideas and recommendations for cultural and structural changes in the LDS church. I also am very thankful for her transparency and acknowledgment of difficult topics in the church and that she was able to open them up for conversation in a positive light. This quote was one of my favorites, “Religious traditions are like artisan sourdough. They are complex, living things, both organization and organism, created and sustained by many processes and actors, shaped by time and their environment. They can be naturally subject to corruption. And yet they are also susceptible, through this same process of leavening, to producing goodness.”
April 20, 2023
I know I am totally the audience for this book. Melissa Wei-Tsing Inouye’s personal essays on her life as an academic, mother, cancer survivor, and Latter-day Saint made me cry multiple times. I appreciated having an inside look into the human way she treats her students and the respect that’s evident in the way she parents. I laughed and cried at so many of her anecdotes about raising young kids while both supporting your husband through grad school and him supporting you through grad school—and not knowing life outside of that for like…decades 😂. It’s hard not to be moved by her dedication to believing the good of individuals, plus she’s so wicked smart. I love everything she writes.
September 16, 2021
This book is unconventional in many ways as it’s a non chronological compilation of letters, correspondence, essays, and so on. I read it because Inouye has gone down a similar career path to what I want to do, and I was hoping to glean some tips from what a real “pro” has done and how she got there. While this book is all her insights, mostly spiritual of course, what I really learned after reading this book wasn’t really about her or her journey but it was more about myself and my journey. I took a lot of what she wrote about personally and came out with the renewed conviction to simply do better and be better. Did I find any secrets to success for grad school applications? No! But did I find some keys to living a successful life? Yes.
While the book did tend to talk about her family a lot, I really connected the most with her essays and letters on the gospel the most.
While the book did tend to talk about her family a lot, I really connected the most with her essays and letters on the gospel the most.
August 30, 2020
I cannot recommend this book enough, for anyone but especially for members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The way Melissa uses stories, letters, and essays to discuss truth, culture, history, wisdom, agency, purpose, and much more is unparalleled.
The one thing I will say is that even though for me the first half was a bit slower, the second half of the book was phenomenal... so if you start and think.. why was Sara raving so much about this book, just keep going!
The one thing I will say is that even though for me the first half was a bit slower, the second half of the book was phenomenal... so if you start and think.. why was Sara raving so much about this book, just keep going!
February 4, 2025
This book was absolutely stunning. I loved every page and come away from reading it feeling refreshed and hopeful about my status as a Latter-day Saint. Inouye doesn't shy away from talking about the hard things about being a member of the Church, but she imbues a sense of optimism in the ways that these things can be understood and dealt with.
I am certain I will reread this book frequently throughout my life. It was truly a balm for my soul.
I am certain I will reread this book frequently throughout my life. It was truly a balm for my soul.
February 18, 2020
I loved the thoughts and both the logic and emotion used to bring about meaningful conclusions. The personal family newsletters were a delight and added so much to the character of the read. “The ultimate responsibility for whether someone grows into the measure of a disciple of Christ lies with that individual herself, not her religion. However, religions teach us what is possible,...” In addition to these type of ideas the author was also willing to address issues of the 21st century and masterfully incorporates her vast historical knowledge. I gained a great deal of insight and found myself contemplating the global reality presented.
April 19, 2022
A wonderful book of a woman's life, thoughts, letters, and reflections about being a Latter-day Saint, a mother, and a cancer victim. We need more books like this, where we have an articulate, educated member navigating the nuances of her beliefs with reason and faith. Wonderful analogies and inspiring life-sketches. A great read.
January 12, 2023
A hodgepodge of essays, letters, musings, and insights from a professor, athlete, cancer survivor and member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There are some thought-provoking and validating moments in this book. There is a lot of beautiful writing. However, most of it seemed like a luxurious self-examination made public. The best part was the end of the book when she talked about her battle with cancer and the possibility of facing death.
October 16, 2019
Melissa Wei-Tsing Inouye is a good essayist, and in this book she thoughtfully expresses her experiences and feelings about the church. I know I have friends who feel strongly about how amazing the book is, and I thought it was good, but for me it was just nice, not a big ah-ha.
January 20, 2021
So good! I listened to the author read her collection of essays, and I could have listened to her all day. She seems like someone I would want as a friend: intelligent, compassionate, introspective, unconventional, willing to tackle ambiguity with faith and grace.
June 5, 2021
I absolutely LOVED this book and wish all Latter-Day Saints would read this. I’m not typically very good at staying focused when books are a collection of essays but this perfect. I liked her quirky, spunky personality combined with her honesty. She raises many good points regarding why she has chosen to remain an active member while also acknowledging room for improvement within the Church. Overall it felt very heartfelt and helpful.
September 1, 2024
"This Church is not the only place where you can go to find God. But you can find God here."
A collection of letters, essays, and lectures from historian Melissa Inouye, who died of colon cancer in the spring of 2024. I love her candid talk of shortcomings of the LDS Church, coupled with her faith and humor. She is truly a beautiful soul.
I liked this book, but Sacred Struggle was even better; this book felt a little like its raw precursor.
A collection of letters, essays, and lectures from historian Melissa Inouye, who died of colon cancer in the spring of 2024. I love her candid talk of shortcomings of the LDS Church, coupled with her faith and humor. She is truly a beautiful soul.
I liked this book, but Sacred Struggle was even better; this book felt a little like its raw precursor.
September 24, 2021
AMAZING!! She talks about hard things and does it lovely.
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