Like Normal People: A Tender and Moving Literary Drama of Three Women and the Search for Acceptance

by Karen E. Bender

A Los Angeles Times bestseller and one of the Washington Post's best books of the year, LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE charts the lives of "three richly textured characters whose irreducible idiosyncrasies, griefs, longings, and loves will surely expand our sense of what it means to be like normal people" (Chicago Tribune). The story of this family revolves around an off-kilter center: Lena, who is forty-eight years old but mentally locked in childhood. Following Lena's escape from her residential home with her troubled twelve-year-old niece and her widowed mother's search for them, Karen Bender moves deftly between past and present, through three entire lifetimes in a single day, as each character searches for love and acceptance in a world where normalcy is elusive. "Poignantly and brilliantly portrayed" (TimeOut New York), LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE is a hilarious, heartbreaking, unforgettable family drama that resonates long after the last page is turned.

Genres: Fiction, Novels

288 pages, Paperback

First published April 1, 2000

Reviews

[Katie Addison · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have such a hard time understanding how anyone could give this book less than 5 stars. It captured me wholly. I was completely engrossed in the characters and the slow description of their lives. I found them so uniquely interesting, and Karen Bender's imagery is so beautiful and thought provoking. I enjoy that, really, so little happens in this book. It takes place in one day, and so many days are like that. This one was simultaneously uneventful and adventurous, with so much happening while not much was going on. For Lena and Shelley, it was such an event. I felt like I was peering into something private the whole time. But it was so good. Definitely one of my new favorites.

[Joan Colby · Rating 2 out of 5]

The premise of this novel was promising. A married couple Ella and Lou. Their daughters, Lena who is retarded and Vivian who is normal. Vivian’s daughter Shelley. Ella and Lou despair over Lena’s future. Lena falls in love and marries Bob, a retarded man who works with her at Goodwill. Lou and Ella strive to find a living situation for the couple, veering from their own home to an apartment to assisted living. Bob dies in an accident. Lou also dies. Shelley, now a teenager, goes off on a jaunt with Lena. The writing is well-done. Here’s the problem, none of the characters, aside from occasionally Lena and Bob, are convincing. A deliberate quirkiness seems imposed upon them. The interaction between Lena and Bob comprises the most interesting part of the book. But that’s just not enough.

[Chris · Rating 4 out of 5]

At first I toyed with the idea of giving this book five stars because the figurative language was just so beautiful. The imagery made me pause and ponder as I read. Then as I continued reading, I downgraded it to four stars. Although that is still a very good rating the plot was a disappointment. At first I thought the main character was Lena but Ella was the character that captured the book. Ella was who I ended up caring about since she was so well developed. Shelly was never completely finished as a character but she was a 12 year old and that under development may have been intentional.

[Jane Riordan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a surprising and uplifting read. A study of love really - how we love those in our lives in different ways, according to their needs and the shape of our hearts, how we have space enough for everyone.

For all those of us who have been fortunate enough to have 'normal' children, who have walked through life, hitting all those milestones, on time and with success; this is a loving look at the way in which one family, and one character in particular, adapts her dreams to encompass her 'child'.

Quite beautiful and finely written.

[Pauline · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wanted to like this book more, but it felt . . . unfinished. I thought there was a lot more that could have been delved into and, though it covered a lot in terms of the characters, it still felt like it was just scratching at the surface. I also found the mother to be unlikeable. I wanted to sympathize with her, but couldn't and that may also be due to my perceived superficiality of the storyline. Sadly, I just thought the author could have done a lot more with this promising storyline.

[Cindy · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book went nowhere fast and I quit reading it when I realized that. A middle-aged mentally challenged woman whose husband has died is visited by her teen-age niece and they go on simple little adventures around their city. It was boring, bland, and not in the least interesting.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very moving, with well imagined characters and incredible description that only occasionally goes on too long.

[Drew · Rating 4 out of 5]

Achingly tender. A refreshingly frank story of a woman who is developmentally disabled and the family that loves her.

[Rhonda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I came across this book by accident and immediately was drawn to the characters, especially the mother, Ella and her differently abled daughter, Lena. I connected with Ella, the mother, as I have a 38 year old daughter with special needs. This story was both heart wrenching and heart warming as Ella realizes that her daughter will never be “normal” but that she still deserves the best life Ella can offer her. Lena has a mind of her own and is quite humorous, which makes for some entertaining moments between her and her family. We learn that it is okay to laugh at her and her childish behavior. Her mother, Ella, learns to let go little by little of her child like daughter, realizing that Lena can live a life that may not be normal to most people, but it is Lena’s life, after all. Lena is happy. She doesn’t know she is different. Near the end of the story, Ella is thinking of her life with Lena and thinks,”Lena looked the same as always. Lena didn’t change but the world changed stubbornly around her.” All during Lena’s life, Ella had worried about how the world could harm her but the world could love her as well.”
Ella thinks, “How had she come to live in such a beautiful place? How had she had such luck to belong to the world. How had she come to feel such tenderness?”
I would say, Lena made all the difference in the world.

[Lacey · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this a compelling novel with lots of heart and love for the characters. The initial paragraph actually turned me off--it seemed overly descriptive. But that was not characteristic of the book. Instead, the descriptions were evocative and the characters were wonderful.

[RyleeAnn Andre · Rating 4 out of 5]

A pretty simple but sweet book. Follows the lives of a couple of women who belong to the same family but different generations, and is beautiful when discussing their relationships and their environments.

[CATHERINE E. LOUGHLIN · Rating 3 out of 5]

The story, told in flashbacks, of a woman raising her developmentally delayed daughter, and what happens one day when the brown daughter and her niece take off on an adventure. Good but weird. Kind of ended with no big conclusion.

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bob! Noooooo! So sad.

[Debbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Here's a book whose beauty really sneaks up on you. I liked it from the very beginning and was fascinated by the characters but the end really spoke to me.

[Sylvia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very well written. Some books start off well but then fade, this was the opposite. The story of a family with a mentally challenged child has heart and depth.

[Patty · Rating 3 out of 5]

Are any of us really normal. Three generations of women, even those who are classified as ‘normal’ have some awful quirks going on in their brains.

[Glenda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ok but not great

[Julianne · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a tender, sweet novel about the lives of three women--a mother, her grown differently-abled daughter, and her grieving granddaughter. The three lives intertwine in a beautiful story.

[Cindy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Came across this book and so glad I did. Beautiful story!

[Natasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing book. Loved every chapter.

[Lana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautifully written, sweet story. I'm going to miss the characters, we get to know them so well. The descriptions make me see my surroundings with more attention to details.

[Dinah D · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book and enjoyed getting to know the characters.

[Donna · Rating 1 out of 5]

Did not finish

[Diana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every sentence is exquisite. In terms of structure, the writing seamlessly moves from present to past.

[Daisy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is just beautiful. Almost perfect. So touching.

Lena clapped her hand over her mouth. "I think you look like a silvery grownup," she said, and she seemed to mean it.

The air between Ella and her husband was bruised. She looked at her soup, not knowing what to say.

"What's your name?" the man asked Shelley.
She did not know what to answer. It was as though he were asking her to be born.

"royal with boredom"

Lena reached forward and put her hands on Shelley's. The girl's hands twitched beneath them. Lena squeezed her fingers very hard.
"I'm crazy."
Lena was gazing at her. "Is this a secret?" Lena asked.
"It doesn't matter."
"Is it?"
"I guess so, yes."
Lena sat up straight with excitement. Her lips were trembling. "What's wrong?" Shelley asked.
"You told me a secret!" said Lena." Me."
That trust filled her aunt with a joy so enormous, she could barely sit still. She made a gleeful sound, banged her heels against the metal floor, and lifted Shelley's hand to kiss the small knuckles. Her eyes were bright with gratitude. "You said a secret to me."

3 mistakes: a plastic Vons grocery bag in the '60s?; the word "stylist"; saying Santa Barbara was south of LA

[Kimberly · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book took up most of my weekend. I loved the authors way of describing the light, " The dark air astonished her, for she had never precisely seen it before. It was the color of deep sapphire and beneath it the sand and water and trash cans were radiant and pure. "
This is mostly the story of a mother's love and how her perception changes as her daughters grow older and she loses her husband. A beautiful well written book. If you like character development and want to see into a woman's heart read this.

[Kristin]

They don't have a "never finished" column. This is one of those books for me. I just couldn't get into it.

And I SO wanted to get into it because it's actually set in Los Angeles! Will someone else read it and then tell me if it's worth it? Ha ha...

[Meghan · Rating 4 out of 5]

endearing account of family, threading through generations and histories til arriving full circle from front to back, the span of only a single day serving the main attraction of the book with first-person memory chapters diving for character insight.

[Jamie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Karen Bender is a wonderful writer. This novel is carefully crafted, touching, and insightful.

[Colleen · Rating 1 out of 5]

I started it, but it didn't keep my interest at all.