Perfectionism: A Practical Guide to Managing "Never Good Enough"

by Lisa Van Gemert

Perfectionism is exhausting.
For gifted children, teens, and adults, the constant pressure to succeed, fear of mistakes, overthinking, procrastination, anxiety, and “never good enough” thinking can quietly steal joy from learning and life.

In Perfectionism, educator and gifted expert offers a practical, research-based guide to understanding and managing perfectionism in healthy, realistic ways.

Rather than encouraging readers to simply “lower standards,” this book helps

build resiliencedevelop healthier thinking patternsmanage fear of failureincrease motivation without burnoutreplace self-criticism with self-awarenessdevelop optimism and emotional strength
Written in a warm, conversational style, this book translates research on mindset, perseverance, habits, and goal-setting into strategies that actually work in everyday life.


Perfect

parents of gifted childrenteachers and counselorsperfectionistic teens and tweensgifted adultsanyone struggling with anxiety tied to achievement and self-worth
Readers will discover practical tools, real-life examples, and immediately usable strategies for turning perfectionism from a source of stress into a pathway toward growth.


Winner of the 2018 TAGT Legacy Award for Best Book for Parents of the Gifted.

Genres: Nonfiction, Parenting, Education, Self Help, Psychology

243 pages, Paperback

Published February 22, 2019

Reviews

[Lauren Campbell · Rating 5 out of 5]

As the title would suggest, this book’s best feature is the practicality, allowing it to be a resource not just for educators, but for families and even students themselves. Van Gemert is an engaging writer and provides vivid antidotes that will speak to any reader with their own issues in perfectionism. The length is also perfect, providing the most important and impactful information in a concise format. And (perhaps due to her own perfectionism) Van Gemert ensures readers fully comprehend the content by offering end-of-chapter key idea lists as well as action steps. I love the action steps because they provided me with very real, applicable things to do to immediately apply the new information and some lists also referenced resources for further reading or interventions, making this a compendium of excellent strategies to battle perfectionism.

[Elaine · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this as part of professional development as an educator. The author provided good insights into perfectionist tendencies, particularly in gifted children, and I was able to identify where I have seen some of these characteristics in my own students or even myself. The book’s primary target audience is parents of gifted children. I felt that educators are the secondary audience since much of the strategies provided are more for implementation in the home. Some of the strategies provided for educators are practical, while others will require systemic changes that are beyond the average educator’s control.

The book was self-published and needed quite a bit more editing.

[Stacy Wolfe · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you have a kiddo in your life, especially a gifted one, who is a perfectionist, you need to read this book. It validates all of the trials and tribulations gifted parents feel about kids who struggle with perfectionism and gives actionable steps to help them, and yourself. I’m super interested in this topic , because also as a teacher, I see this in my classroom. Perfectionism is one of those things that can fly under the radar for a while and then when it fears its head, it could be troublesome. I’d prefer to have the knowledge I need to say the necessary things when they need to be said.

[Ritu · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful book!

As an adult, I picked this up on a whim because I struggle with perfectionism (it's geared towards parents of sensitive, gifted children) I LOVED it. This is such a great book written by an educator who obviously knows she is talking about. It is both insightful and practical, which you can't say for all nonfiction books. If you are someone who struggles with perfectionism (no matter your age), I highly recommend you give this book a try.

[Martha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Prefect

Oops! Perfect! Good ideas for managing the perfectionist in ourselves and our students. Actionable steps at the end of each chapter provide an easy reference for implementation.

[Brandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

There are some wonderful strategies and insights in this book to help parents and teachers that interact with perfectionist. However, I feel like there have to be some fundamental changes to our society and educational system for many of these suggestions to work.

[Müjde · Rating 4 out of 5]

Written mainly for parents of perfectionist children, yet the reader gains a lot of insight about adult perfectionism as well. There are many action points to learn as well, so this is truly a practical guide.

[Gregan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great Book

This book gives great insight into dealing with perfectionism in an adult or child. I appreciate the application activities as well. It is encouraging knowing my family isn't alone on this journey of dealing with perfectionism.

[Renee Hale · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting book which included practical tips on ways to assist people with perfectionistic tendencies. I especially like the rewording examples and definitions through other subjects to help explain it.

[Michelle Smart · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fun and readable. I got some insight into not just my children but myself as well. One of the most helpful ideas to me was that there are different ways that perfectionism manifests.

[Bethany Fader · Rating 1 out of 5]

It was more technical and not what I was hoping it would be.

[Jenna · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a phenomenal book on understanding perfectionism and making sure it's not hindering your life.

[Emma · Rating 4 out of 5]

Full of practical tips and information to help perfectionists succeed in and out of school. I really enjoyed this book.

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

great!

This is such a great book to understand and help perfectionist! It was overwhelming how much it helped me understand myself and my students!

[Susan A. · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read this for work. It has some good ideas for working with perfectionists. However, it is self-published and needed to be edited better.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

Learned so much about perfectionism... especially the different types. Really enjoyed this one!

[Athena · Rating 4 out of 5]

Work reads on vacation count toward my Goodreads total, too!