Healing Resistance: A Radically Different Response to Harm

by Kazu Haga, Bernard LaFayette Jr. (Foreword), David C. Jehnsen (Foreword)

An expert in the field offers a mindfulness-based approach to nonviolent action, demonstrating how nonviolence is a powerful tool for personal and social transformation

Nonviolence was once considered the highest form of activism and radical change. And yet its basic truth, its restorative power, has been forgotten. In Healing Resistance , leading trainer Kazu Haga blazingly reclaims the energy and assertiveness of nonviolent practice and shows that a principled approach to nonviolence is the way to transform not only unjust systems but broken relationships.
 
With over 20 years of experience practicing and teaching Kingian Nonviolence, Haga offers us a practical approach to societal conflict first begun by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. during the Civil Rights Movement, which has been developed into a fully workable, step-by-step training and deeply transformative philosophy (as utilized by the Women’s March and Black Lives Matter movements). Kingian Nonviolence takes on the timely issues of endless protest and activist burnout, and presents tried-and-tested strategies for staying resilient, creating equity, and restoring peace.

An accessible and thorough introduction to the principles of nonviolence, Healing Resistance is an indispensable resource for activists and change agents, restorative justice practitioners, faith leaders, and anyone engaged in social process.

Genres: Nonfiction, Social Justice, Politics, Activism, Psychology, Philosophy, Race

296 pages, Paperback

Published January 14, 2020

Reviews

[SaraCat · Rating 5 out of 5]

When a person recommended this book to me, I was unsure about reading it, not because of the content the title indicated it would have but because I worried it would be a dense and boring book. However, I was happily surprised that it was written in an accessible manner to those who may be new(er) to the concepts laid out in this book about nonviolence. The format of 3 larger sections broken into chapters and subsections within each made it easy to follow along and I think will be helpful for referencing in the future should I want to reread about specific things.

In addition, Haga includes small snippets of humor throughout the book - mostly in footnotes - which added to making the book feel more approachable for non-specialists.

While I think this book is especially an important read for those wanting to be active in larger social change, I think there is also a lot for those looking for more local/personal social change as well. Even if you don't think you'd agree with the nonviolence approach, I think there is a lot to think and contemplate about in many of the points he presents and talks about. I also greatly appreciated the fact that he pointed tells readers to not judge those who make use of violence to try and bring about change.

[Bre · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely one of the most useful books I have come across in my work in social movements.

[Nadav David · Rating 4 out of 5]

Several important offerings in this book including; detailing different levels and types of conflict and the conditions necessary to address them, connecting nonviolence in the context of direct actions to interpersonal and communal work, and more about intervening / preventing violence. There were moments in reading this book I felt disappointed and/or challenged by the writing style, introductory feel and some of the content about the nonviolence tradition. Overall, I think still worth reading for people interested in addressing conflict and violence, abolition, healing and more.

[Alison · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone who has been running a kindness project since 2012, I deeply needed this book.

6 years ago I realized that my version of "non-violence" was actually toxic positivity.

Kazu Haga helps explain that non-violence doesn't mean staying passive—it means taking action for justice.

As someone who has been a periphery member of activist movements, it was interesting to hear the strategies and tools that make a campaign successful. It made me wonder just what else I was ignorant about! (a lot)

Loved Kazu Haga's humility as he described his mistakes and I love how he gently teaches to work with the society and people we exactly have right now, instead of becoming bitter in our idealism.

[alaya · Rating 4 out of 5]

this book felt repetitive at some points, but it made up for it in the notes/suggestions and the variety of ways to apply the skills in action. really appreciated this work, especially the author’s vulnerability and humor!

[Linnea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fierce vulnerability. That is, among other things, a message I am taking with me after listening to Healing Resistance.

Had to listen this slowly to give time for thoughts. A worthy book for anyone, there's a lot to learn.

[T.R. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book. Haga has a courageous and unique analysis of resistance work. I read this book a few months ago, but it was one of those books that pushed me to get back onto Goodreads. I want to spread the good news! If you're doing education, activism, meditation, student of the civil rights movement, this is an important book to deepen your analysis, strengthen your heart, and help us build our beloved community. Thanks Kazu!

[Dana · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. Even though it isn’t religious, it really aligns with what Christ taught about radical love, and I think every Christian should read this and evaluate their dedication to activism and reducing systemic violence. I also think all activists would benefit from reading this to recognize how to better organize, and for everyone to improve their conflict resolution skills. This book drew from some of my favorite writers—James Baldwin, Audre Lorde, Brene Brown, and tons more. 100% recommend. (My only minor complaint is that even though he did address sexism he kind of seemed to glaze over his condemnation of it. I wanted a little more in that regard.)

One point that seems so clear once you hear it, but is difficult to conclude on your own beforehand, is the idea that non violence is a practice. If you took one kung fu lesson you likely wouldn’t be able to draw from those skills in a high risk setting because you hadn’t internalized the techniques. Non violent resistance is something we have to work at and practice, because it is intensely difficult, and it takes mindfulness and dedication. Some of the ideas from the book are hard to swallow because we often don’t want to think about forgiving the people who we see as the worst of the worst. It’s so much easier to hate them. But like with what I read about prison abolition recently, you have to practice what you preach/be consistent with these values in every aspect of your life—the big things and the small things, and if we’re fighting for a better world, we have to work on healing ALL people. And that doesn’t mean we should dismiss harm or allow it to continue, but anyway the book does a fantastic job of articulating that idea and backing it up with research and examples. The entire book is so well articulated and addressed all the side arguments and such (even though the joke at the end of the appendix was funny but did push back against his point a little bit. I think we’re just not supposed to overanalyze it.)

[Heidi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Please, read or listen this book.

[Nate Atkinson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a joy to read, it brought peace and love to my heart. It made me realize all the ways I can bring peace into my daily life and bring peace to those around me.

[Piper Wilson · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this was a super valuable read and gives a ton of context to the backbone of Res Life and its goals. I think this reading will genuinely inform the way I approach conflict in my role for this upcoming semester (and ideally next year as well) and likely throughout my life. It’s inspiring and a good, worthwhile read.

[xenia · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best resource on nonviolence I've read. It dispels the stereotype of nonviolence as inaction and passivity in the face of atrocity, instead connecting it to collective struggles of direct action and prefigurative politics. Kazu argues that both Martin Luther King and Mahatma Gandhi were sympathetic to violence. They didn't moralise over those who used violence to resist their oppressors. Violence is necessary for survival in a violent world. But violence can become self-defeating. If we have no other tools available, our ways of relating to others are limited to destruction, separation, and distancing. We end up shadowing our oppressors from the other side of the barricade. We create vampire castles. Nonviolence, then, is an act of decolonisation. It rehumanises us, and teaches us to trust (ourselves and our allies) again and to develop actionable plans towards the emancipation of all. It is empathy as action, rather than mere reflection.

A few years back, I took a paper called Alternative Futures. It was meant to be a space for interrogating the margins of capital and imagining paths out of this mess. The final assignment was a 5000 word essay and I spent so much time outlining the issues of animality under capitalist, humanist, and socialist logics, that I never reached the future. I was mired in the present, trapped in an endless interrogation of the world as it was. I was the capitalist realist; the annoying Trot who talked forever about world politics, yet could only articulate one vision of political organisation. Critique is vital to any political struggle, but it is so, so easy to become trapped by it, because there are an endless number of things wrong with the world, and you will never address them all.

Violence is a time sink that steals all your future joy. Violence is the endless regurgitation of where we already are. Violence is the body horror of inheritance without difference, without possibility, without future.

All that I have learnt to become human again is through nonviolence. Dao, wu wei, śūnyatā, dialectics, attunement, mentalisation, transformative justice. The movement from the partial to the universal unfurls the present like petals coiled to decay. This is not a rejection of violence per say, but its sublation into a larger whole that actively cultivates life, rather than reactively flinches from it. Decay becomes sustenance for future generations. Kazu has so many wonderful examples of this. In 2011, a school in North Lawndale redirected funds from metal detectors and security guards to nonviolent training for its students. Rather than treat them as criminals, they were treated as community organisers, whose success at reducing harm rewarded everyone with "ever-increasing prizes such as a DJ in the cafeteria, no-homework days, and a community BBQ."

Nonviolence is about building the foundations of a sustainable life, beyond bare survival. I, a lowly university tutor, have not implemented such systemic reforms, but I try to engage in nonviolence on an interpersonal level. One of the lecturers I worked with was strict about students needing to present a medical certificate for an extension. They inscribed the students as suspect and lazy, before even engaging with them. However, when I talked to the students, they were struggling with various neurodivergent conditions, from depression, anxiety, and burnout to autism, ADHD, and narcissism (i.e. perfectionism). The students weren't the problem, the university was. Students had to keep track of multiple papers and assignments. They had to navigate a dynamic timetable that changed each semester. Though encouraged to study together, they were inscribed as competitors by market forces, confined to a capitalist conception of success. They had to pay hundreds of dollars rent per week to live in damp, shitty flats owned by absentee landlords. Some basic foodstuffs, like button mushrooms, had doubled in price since the pandemic. Many students were undiagnosed, so they weren't receiving drugs or therapies that would alleviate their conditions. On top of these issues, they had a passive-aggressive lecturer who victim-blamed them for their troubles. My goal was to validate their concerns and show them paths out. Kazu would have probably talked to the lecturer and earnestly presented their needs, but he's a more trusting person than I am. I taught the students how to survive the university system. I told them that their failings didn't reflect their humanity, but the university's inhumanity. That shame was a tool of oppression that coheres to you through complex trauma. I advocated for them where I could and I showed them how to word their emails, what conditions to emphasise to be heard, and that if they were still dismissed by teaching staff that the problem lay with their lecturer, not themselves. Ableism was the issue to organise around.

This is the first step of any political movement. Consciousness raising. Only when our experiences are validated, do we feel our lives are worth living. Only then does struggle matter. Beyond this is the active dismantlement of invalidating and oppressive systems. For Kazu, this involves the institutionalisation of interdependence, a concept he traces to indigenous cultures. Ubuntu, pratītyasamutpāda, hózhó, echad. Interdependence isn't the reserve of Buddhism alone. It's a concept that has been actively suppressed by colonisation events across the globe, because it is deeply incompatible with privatisation. In my personal relationships, this emerges through mutual aid and mental health networks. Enacting care in a collective manner, rather than through self-responsibility. I try and address issues through nonviolent communication, so instead of blaming and shaming others, I orient to needs. What harms were experienced, what needs weren't met, and what actions can mend. Under such a framework, there is no strict division between persecutor and persecuted, no reductive cause and effect logic, but rather a complex of parts that have ground to a halt. It's cybernetics of the soul. While certain people or actions may be more accountable for the harm that's arisen (transformative justice orients to victim/survivor needs, first and foremost), my reactions to them are hopefully not based in moralism, fragility, or revenge, but mentalisation and reconciliation: validation of both positions, so a new third can emerge. This is the path to healing, and those who don't attempt it, and continue to escalate conflict, can get the fuck out of my life.

Nonviolence, applied to class struggle, can strengthen revolutionary praxis. Kazu makes the point that when we approach our enemies with nonviolence, we gain a greater clarity towards how they operate. By researching the training procedures of cops, rather than (simply) dismissing them as white supremacist pigs, Kazu learnt about how they're put through month long sessions, by private military turned corporate security firms, that depict criminals as insurgents. North American cops are primed to shoot first and ask question later, because they genuinely think that a second of hesitation will lead to their deaths. This doesn't excuse their actions, but it places them in context. These violent infrastructures are all around us, and if we don't understand them, we can't resist them. Martin Luther King trained his followers in nonviolence for months before a sit-in, because they needed to be as prepared as their enemies were. They roleplayed cops, shoving and yelling slurs, using their batons. They were taught not to rise to anger, and to look straight into the face of their oppressor. They were taught resilience in the face of obscenity, and this resilience led to mass support, because suddenly you had footage of white cops beating the shit out of defenseless old black people for no reason save the colour of their skin. Through nonviolent resistance, the cops ended up portraying themselves as white supremacists.

To give more support to this, there are countless examples of bloodless revolutions where the working class have convinced the military that their state leaders don't give a fuck about them. That they're being sent to pointless wars to die for causes that don't exist for nations that don't care for them. I'm not a particular fan of the USSR, but the October Revolution was largely bloodless because workers, peasants, widows, and soldiers banded together. This combined weight led to the state's capitulation. Building any form of solidarity requires nonviolent communication: the articulation of collective harms, needs, actions for rectification. That's how you build a historic bloc. That's how you overthrow governments. That's how you create a revolution.

[Steve · Rating 4 out of 5]

Healing Resistance came to my attention through book discussion group led by a activist in our community that is working to bring healing to families that have been disrupted through violence.

The weekly discussion centered on the last two sections of the book:
-Part 2: The Six Principles of Nonviolence
-Part 3: The Six Steps of Nonviolence.

I had not been exposed to Martin Luther King Jr.'s principles of nonviolence before and found the principles to be extremely useful in solidifying my thoughts in how to have an impact on the effects of violence.

King's concept of 'The Beloved Community' and what means to seek bringing even those we may perceive as 'enemies' into the community because of their value in God's eyes gave me words to the perspective that I have been gaining.

The steps to nonviolence that culminate in reconciliation make complete the goal of establishing 'The Beloved Community' as a sought after reality.

A great privilege we had was having the author, Kazu Haga, actually join our discussion for our summary week. Thanks Mr. Haga for giving us that gift.

I'd like to give this book two ratings: I'd give a 4 for the last 2 parts. Kazu does a great job of defining and illustrating the Kingian principals and steps.

Because I read and discussed those first, then returned to read the start of the book, I found the first part that describes the authors journey to discover and adopt Kingian nonviolence to be anticlimactic.

My suggesting is to start with part 1, but if you find it too slow paced, jump to the last two parts and be inspired to become part of the Healing Resistance in your community.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

THIS. WAS. SO. GOOD. This is one of those re-energising books that spoke to my soul in so many ways. Within a couple pages, I was hooked on Haga's refreshingly honest, informal writing style and the anecdotes he pulls in that are so valuable and unique and unexpected. It was a book I randomly picked up but that I ended up reading at the perfect time –after a v lOng series of semesters and feeling discouraged about our capacity to drive systemic change. It's not that this book presented an easy solution; it acknowledged that an easy solution is impossible. But something about how Haga frames it just affirmed that what we can do collectively is something to never be underestimated.
One of the main things I loved about this is that it was just so validating and refreshing to see a lot of my views and hopes and worries (about restorative justice and harm reduction and how to do it all in a world like ours) reflected so sincerely on the pages of this book and despite this rly vague review I hope you find the same is true for you. (& if that doesn't convince you pls pls read so then we can discuss ;)

[Lori Hodges · Rating 5 out of 5]

"In left-wing politics, there seems to be a prevailing worldview that people who don't agree with every social justice principle are racist, sexist, classist, and basically just the worst type of human being. You're either with us or you're a racist, and there's no in between. People on the right seem to think others who don't agree with their worldview are over-sensitive communists or anti-patriotic elitist morons who just want to sit on the moral high horse and complain about everything. You're either with us, or you're an SJW snowflake, and there's no in between. Part of the work of nonviolence is to expand the in-between space, sit in the nuance,and sit in the contradiction."
- Kazu Haga, Healing Resistance

"The person on the other side might be 99% wrong. But what's the 1% of what they're saying that you can understand and agree with? Understanding that 1% will strengthen you're own perspective."
- Troy Williams, Restorative Justice Leader
Healing Resistance

[Taylor Blackwell · Rating 4 out of 5]

I chose this book for my Quaker meeting book club, and it was a really good fit for trying to live out what we call a peace testimony.

I have been a victim of many types of abuse by others and have escaped an abusive marriage with someone who was formally diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder, who is currently in jail for assault (this is probably his 7th time being arrested for assault in the past 2 years alone). I am also a therapist to survivors of abuse, so this will influence my review and world view.

I appreciate and overwhelmingly agree with the spirit and intent behind the book and what it advocates for. I think that disclosure in the beginning of the book, that there are parts you will disagree with and to keep in mind the overall intent.

A strong critique I have is towards the end of the book in "quick responses to common criticisms of nonviolence", Haga makes the position that we shouldn't use extreme cases to discredit what he is saying, specifically, that psychopathy and narcissism are rare, with rates of psychopathy only being 1%. He has strong issues with the mental health field and how they "over-pathologize" and appears skeptical that 25% of some prison populations have people who are psychopaths, and he believes these are "people simply acting out their traumas as opposed to there being something fundamentally wrong with them. In fact, once you start to hear the stories of many men in prison, you would imagine that something would be wrong with them if they didn't act out in some way."

Clearly, I am biased as a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who works with victims of abuse and is a former victim herself. But I think he is making some biased remarks that can be incredibly damaging to victims. Comparing his experiences in social justice work and protests, and particularly experiences working with incarcerated individuals in the Bay Area where there are extreme racial and economic disparities and high gang activity will shape his worldview. A prison in this area probably would have less psychopaths than a place like Maine which is the safest state in the country will low levels of gang activity. The pathology of these areas is likely different with places like Oakland having higher number of people who do not naturally want to be violent but are doing so out of survival and social conditioning.

People acting out their traumas and demonstrating psychopathy/sociopathy are not mutually exclusive. Some state that psychopaths are born, and sociopaths are made. He blames society for the issues with violence and not on individuals. I lean more towards society/family systems as contributors for violence, but clearly there are some individual factors since not everyone who experiences trauma becomes violent. It is not that black and white. There are also people with low rates of trauma who become violent. Also, Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder (sociopathy) are often made in trauma and they ARE acting out their traumas in unhelpful and damaging ways. But they are still sociopaths.

Actual psychopathy may be 1% but Narcissistic Personality Disorder and other conditions that contribute to violent and abusive behaviors with little to no remorse is higher than that. Most people aren't like this, but it is higher than 1%, especially when you combine them all. Haga states this is "rare" but it is not, and it fails the acknowledge the very high sexual assault statistics and coercive control domestic violence rates, particularly towards women. Abuse from people who do not show remorse is not rare and attempts at reconciliation can be life-threatening to some.

Haga can't tackle all issues and this might be better addressed by someone else who knows more about these specific issues, but I think there was a huge missed opportunity with those viewpoints expressed. It might seem like a tiny thing to argue, but it matters quite a bit. Many victims aren't believed and we hear too many messages like this that are minimizing of our experiences.

With this, Haga writes in the last chapter that "Whether or not we'll end oppression, overcome violence, or reconcile all conflict is not the point. The point is to always be walking in the direction of freedom." Just because there are abusive people who will likely never work towards accountability to reconcile, doesn't mean that these principles don't matter or can't be applied. In cases of abuse, victims are at risk if they try to respond to violence with more violence. Being nonviolent may protect their lives, at least to the point where they can leave the situation safely and set appropriate boundaries. A lot of the coercive control dynamic is about the perpetrator wanting to have control over the person, so trying to fight them back to gain control could be life-threatening and escalate the situation.

Even though my ex-husband did a lot of horrific things to myself and many other people, I can still use these principles. I can choose to forgive. Reconciliation is unlikely as he likely won't be held accountable, but I cannot control others, only myself. I am open but realistic to the chance of reconciliation. I choose to see him not only as who he is today but also as a young boy who was verbally and emotionally abused by his own narcissistic father. It doesn't excuse what he does, but I am trying to lean into believing that "that of God is in everyone." He has the capacity to change, even if unlikely. It is not my job to fix him or rescue him, but I can feel good when I sleep at night knowing I am doing my best (and failing at times) to live out my values of nonviolence.

[Caraline · Rating 5 out of 5]

An important and timely read on the power of principled nonviolence. Kazu Haga effortlessly demonstrates the importance of repairing both our structural harms and our interpersonal harms in the quest for Beloved Community. Healing Resistance acts as a great introduction to the study of nonviolence and offers counterpoints to common critiques for the use of nonviolence. I would highly recommend to anyone just starting off their study of nonviolence as well as an seasoned nonviolentist looking to deepen their dedication to its practice.

[ade · Rating 4 out of 5]

my one qualm is that he says microagressions aren’t violent. They .. are, and he said that so early in the book I had a hard time trusting him. But with time and space, I was able to see all the super important learnings in this book. Non violence is such a difficult but worthwhile practice to commit to.

[Nicole · Rating 5 out of 5]

Strong work. Has depth and concepts to chew on after finishing- while also being a readable, accessible place to get a handle on Kingian Nonviolence and it’s connection to our inner lives and the collective healing ahead of humanity.

[Kenley Neufeld · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a long-time student of nonviolence, I was excited to pickup the book Healing Resistance by Kazu Haga. Not only was it published by Parallax Press, founded by Thich Nhat Hanh, the jacket quotes from Michelle Alexander, Joanna Macy, and Larry Yang said this was a book for me to read.

Kazu writes in a very friendly, personable, and real style. We are brought right into the stories as he explores the intricacies of Kingian Nonviolence. We begin with some basic definitions of violence, nonviolence, and conflict.

As Kazu writes, “nonviolence is about action, not inaction.” This is an important concept to understand about nonviolence. He continues, “Nonviolence gives us an alternative way of responding: to face. Facing means looking your assailant in the eye, not backing down, not giving into fear, and not reacting in kind.” And perhaps most importantly, nonviolence allows us to heal.

Both Thich Nhat Hanh and Dr. Martin Luther King speak of beloved community. As I read the Six Principles of Nonviolence, I can’t help but draw parallels with the Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings of the Order of Interbeing. Like the Trainings, the Principles are interconnected. They inter-are. And practicing one we can practice all the other ones.

The Six Principles of Nonviolence
1. Nonviolence is a way of life for courageous people.
2. The Beloved Community is the framework for the future.
3. Attack forces of evil, not persons doing evil.
4. Accept suffering for the sake of the cause to achieve the goal.
5. Avoid internal violence of the spirit as well as external physical violence.
6. The universe is on the side of justice.

These were first articulated by Dr. King in his 1960 essay, “Pilgrimage to Nonviolence.” These are now the Six Principles of Kingian Nonviolence. Kazu has been a trainer and teacher of these since 2009 and form the heart of this book. Each are looked into with greater detail.

The last third of the book explores the Six Steps of Nonviolence. Namely, information gathering, education, personal commitment, negotiation, direct action, and reconciliation. It is this last one, reconciliation, that can be seen as the goal of nonviolent action. In this section of the book, we see how to apply these steps in the social justice movement. How to organize and to get things changed. To build and create the Beloved Community. To experience reconciliation.

It’s not all about external action. We learn that the internal work is just as important as the external work. Maybe even more important. If you want to learn more about what nonviolence means and how it can be applied in our lives today, then look no further than this book.

As Michelle Alexander wrote, “Kazu Haga’s deep, nuanced, and principled commitment to nonviolence has challenges and inspired me and many others.”

Purchase directly from Parallax Press or from Bookshop.

[Alcina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book for anyone from beginner to seasoned activist. Kazu Haga breaks down Kingian Nonviolence and other justice and healing modalities in a way that makes them very accessible to a wide array of readers. I plan to give this to several elder activists - and my 14 year old niece.

Haga breaks down the Six Principles of Kingian Nonviolence, Restorative Justice/Practices (RP), separates & defines four types of conflict as well as other clarifying enumerations of large concepts. As an RP practitioner, I found his handling of restorative work to be excellent, and I found the Kingian principles revelatory and beautiful.

Kingian Nonviolence dispels the myth that nonviolence is passivity "Nonviolence is not about what not to do. It is about what you are going to do", and has clear steps toward justice and conflict work that have proven efficacy. Haga's handling of nuance and contradiction is unique and powerful, as well as his personal approach to understanding alternate perspectives (listening to right wing radio on regular basis - with an open mind -for instance). More than one thing can be true at the same time, we can expand to hold contradiction, and still seek accountability and healing.

The clarity of why shaming and punishment doesn't work for preventing future harm, or healing harm that has occurred is present not only in the concepts in the book, but his personal experience via years of offering trainings in prisons. There is still a lot of resistance to RP and nonviolent approaches to harm - especially in Law Enforcement and Corrections, and I think the accessibility and clarity in this book are useful to help naysayers possibly see the light of why these healing and justice practices ultimately protect us all.

[lilin23 · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an enlightening read for me to gain better clarity on the kind of society I'd like to strive for.

Personally, I've always struggled with the concept of crime and punishment, in terms of the idea that a person should receive punishment in return for the hurt they cause. Even if I got hurt, I don't necessarily want to pass on / pass back the hurt...plus I don't think others receiving hurt necessarily makes me feel better (maybe in the moment, yes! I got my revenge! But no I don't feel good about myself in the long term). Cuz ultimately, I just want everyone to be able to live life without pain and suffering.

This book helped me find the vocab I needed to process my thoughts and feelings; and also provided greater clarity on the kind of relationships I'd like to build - be it personal , community , international relations (esp in the current Israel-Palestinian climate).

My greatest takeaway was defo on the topic of reconciliation. That conflict management should ultimately strive for repairing of relationships, not evaluating who is good/evil, winner/loser to divide us further. We need to all be on the same side to want to end pain and suffering.

Note that Haga is quite long winded at the start about his personal story....I went through the first section quite quickly; learning mainly came in from the middle section onwards.

[Mallory Everhart · Rating 4 out of 5]

A really fascinating and important look at Kingian Nonviolence and the ways it challenges and informs activist work. It centers the ideal of Beloved Community and continually points back to a fundamental belief in human capacity to heal without devolving into permissive liberalism, which I find I am hungry for in these days. Haga's prose is engaging and I found his footnote commentary charming and informative.

I am definitely on board with the philosophy as presented and took away an appreciation for the amount of training and practice it takes to walk in the world this way. My biggest critique is that I wanted more "how". The "weight-lifting" exercises at the end were tangible action steps but they focus more on the individual and less on the collective, which seems to undermine one of the major premises of the book, namely that none of this happens in isolation.

Overall, though, I'm very glad I read this and it's sparking my interest in further nonviolent organizing and my commitment to RJ work in my community.

[Shana · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a wonderful starting point for those new to the concepts and practices of Kingian Nonviolence. Kazu Haga breaks down the primary ideas in a non-intimidating and readable way. He does this in part by weaving in stories from his own journey into this practice and injects some humor into it as well. What could have been a very bland book comes across, instead, as the loving project of someone who is very dedicated to the study and practice of nonviolence. His passion for it is clear in the repetitive parts of the book, but I didn't experience it as annoying. He asks the reader to take what we want from the book, and I can see myself doing exactly that. There were some areas I wasn't fully convinced on or that I would need to look into further, but the majority of the book had me nodding along and feeling inspired. The actionable steps at the end of the book were particularly appreciated and I could see it becoming the basis of a beginner's nonviolence group study or accountability group.

[Bex · Rating 5 out of 5]

Haga masterfully explains that nonviolence is the north start leading us to freedom. Nonviolence is action and it’s fighting back. I am grateful for the ways he showcases true courage and that he acknowledges things are messy and you cannot be perfect. It is more important to be effective in tactics rather than arguing the nuance of them.

Haga writes in an understandable tone and like he would talk.

I am still wondering about sexual violence though… however, as I continue to read about desire and sex, rape, I understand sexual violence is so much more about power.

Anyways, we continue this work because things don’t have to be this way and because we have the propensity to create so much good.

[Kw · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25. Overall I'm glad I read this book, with its approachable language and deeply resonant ideas. Among other elements I appreciated Appendix 1, "Nonviolence Weights," including "5-20 pounds: Try to understand both sides of someone else's conflict... 20-50 pounds: Cultivate your ability to simply sit with intense emotions." However the book is sometimes repetitive in content and phrasing; Haga's appearance on the podcast Finding Our Way is a much more concise version of similar material (https://www.findingourwaypodcast.com/...). My parting impression is feeling inspired to deepen my walk on the nonviolent path.

[Serafina Scalo · Rating 5 out of 5]

I truly believe everyone should read this book - not just so called organizers and activists, but any human being who wants to live in a world of love and justice.

Unlike many books on social justice, this one is highly applicable at all scales, relevant to these times, acknowledging of the nuance of nonviolence and different lived experiences, and a fun read (feels almost like a memoir sometimes!). Despite the intense topic of fighting immense injustice and violence, Haga writes with joy, playfulness, and compassion.

Great read! If you’re on the fence, give this book a try. You won’t regret it. :)

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a really thoughtful, interesting book about the basics and reality of non-violence, told through the memoirs of one practitioner. It was really interesting to have the authors perspective, as he is someone who inhabits two cultures that are very different (Japanese and American) and thus he has a unique kind of perspective on this work. He may nonviolence feel like some thing that you can practice in your every day life right now, and also some thing that is worth it to pursue and years of study. I think I’ll be returning to this book in the future.

[Deb · Rating 5 out of 5]

There is a lot to like here but the best happens when Haga is discussing the irony in the fact that Martin Luther King Jr (a Nobel Peace Prize winner) was arrested time and time again for disturbing the peace.
"We cannot disturb something that doesn't exist. When we use nonviolence to confront violence and injustice, we are not disturbing the peace, we are disturbing complacency. When we engage in the hard work of nonviolence and social change, we are not disturbing the peace. We are fighting for it."

[Eliza · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn’t understand what the philosophy of non-violence really was until reading this book, and the author Kazu Haga does a great job of breaking it down into understandable pieces. I think I’ve felt non-violence in my bones my whole life but thought I must be wrong or overly “sensitive” to believe every single human is worthy of a just accountability process. This book helped me see that it’s not a naive perspective, but a difficult, disciplined, courageous choice to show up to in the world with non-violent heart, language, and action.