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Three Brothers: Memories of My Family
In this heartfelt, intimate memoir, Yan Lianke brings the reader into his childhood home in Song County in Henan Province, painting a vivid portrait of rural China in the 1960s and '70s and chronicling the extraordinary lives of Yan Lianke's father and uncles, as well as his own. Yan's parents are so poor that they can only afford to use wheat flour on New Year and festival days, and as a child he dreams of fried scallion buns, and once steals from his father to buy a sesame seed cake. Yan yearns to leave the village, however he can, and soon novels become an escape. He resolves to become a writer himself after reading on the back of a novel that its author was given leave to remain in the city of Harbin after publishing her book. In the evenings, after finishing back-breaking shifts hauling stones at a cement factory, sometimes sixteen hours long, he sets to work writing. A career in the Army ultimately allows Yan to escape village life, but he is filled with regrets as he recalls these years of scarcity, turmoil, and poverty. A powerful portrait of the trials of daily life, as well as a philosophical meditation on grief, death, home, and fate, and gleaming throughout with Yan's quick wit and gift for imagery, Three Brothers is a personal portrait of a politically devastating period, and a celebration of the power of the family to hold together even in the harshest circumstances.
224 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2009
About the author
Yan Lianke
81 books538 followersYan Lianke (simplified Chinese: 阎连科; traditional Chinese: 閻連科; pinyin: Yán Liánkē; Wade–Giles: Yen Lien-k'e, born 1958) is a Chinese writer of novels and short stories based in Beijing. His work is highly satirical, which has resulted in some of his most renowned works being banned.
He started writing in 1978 and his works include: Xia Riluo (夏日落), Serve the People (为人民服务), Enjoyment (受活), and Dream of Ding Village (丁庄梦). He has also published more than ten volumes of short stories. Enjoyment, which was published in 2004, received wide acclaim in China. His literature has been published in various nations, and some of his works have been banned in China.
(Wikipedia)
He started writing in 1978 and his works include: Xia Riluo (夏日落), Serve the People (为人民服务), Enjoyment (受活), and Dream of Ding Village (丁庄梦). He has also published more than ten volumes of short stories. Enjoyment, which was published in 2004, received wide acclaim in China. His literature has been published in various nations, and some of his works have been banned in China.
(Wikipedia)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews
February 4, 2020
This might be the first English translation I've ever read from a Chinese author, and it's easy to see why Lianke's work is popular in China. His writing (and the wonderful translation) is lyrical and poetic at times, philosophical and descriptive. He writes of growing up in a small rural community, the struggles to survive during the Communist revolution when the land was taken away from the farmers and their crops were seized. He uses the word filial many times to describe the devotion that sons and daughters feel towards their parents and all elders. They have an incredible sense of duty towards their elders, and of course the elders are completely devoted to the welfare of their children as well.
Most startling was the educational system during Lianke's childhood when "advancement to the next grade was based solely on our ability to recite Chairman Mao quotes". Though he was drawn to the city and wanted to be a writer, he felt that his fate, like that of his parents, was to work the land; he couldn't see a way out of that fate which would consign him to poverty. Educated youths were sent from the cities to the countryside to work alongside the peasants, which confirmed that the gap between urban and rural life was far greater than his people had thought. He felt that writing a novel would allow him to escape the land and move to the city for good, and he devoted what little idle time he had to writing.
He wrote extensively about the homes that his father built for his children; three rooms and a tile roof seemed to be the highest aspiration for their futures. His father worked extraordinarily hard to take care of his children and died early as a result. The author stated repeatedly that "one should never forget one's gratitude toward one's parents". The filial bond extended to uncles and aunts as well, and the author described the plight of his father's two brothers - thus the title "Three Brothers".
The book is a testament to the strength of family ties and how much each member is willing to endure to survive and thrive.v
Most startling was the educational system during Lianke's childhood when "advancement to the next grade was based solely on our ability to recite Chairman Mao quotes". Though he was drawn to the city and wanted to be a writer, he felt that his fate, like that of his parents, was to work the land; he couldn't see a way out of that fate which would consign him to poverty. Educated youths were sent from the cities to the countryside to work alongside the peasants, which confirmed that the gap between urban and rural life was far greater than his people had thought. He felt that writing a novel would allow him to escape the land and move to the city for good, and he devoted what little idle time he had to writing.
He wrote extensively about the homes that his father built for his children; three rooms and a tile roof seemed to be the highest aspiration for their futures. His father worked extraordinarily hard to take care of his children and died early as a result. The author stated repeatedly that "one should never forget one's gratitude toward one's parents". The filial bond extended to uncles and aunts as well, and the author described the plight of his father's two brothers - thus the title "Three Brothers".
The book is a testament to the strength of family ties and how much each member is willing to endure to survive and thrive.v
July 2, 2020
I had earlier read Yan Lianke’s ‘Dream of Ding Village’, a book that left me very keen to read more of this author from China whose writings are deemed provocative by the Government there for his style ofwriting: an almost brooding but serious satire of how things come to be in the country.
‘Three Brothers: Memories of My Family’ is a memoir of the author’s family in the backdrop of the Cultural Revolution with the focus on the lives of Lianke’s father and two of his Uncles in Song County in Henan Province. Trust Lianke to make the writing not merely about his family while taking readers to the abject poverty and the hardships faced by the common people, for he also tells us how political leaderships and the decisions they take do not take into consideration how the people on the ground live with the weight of strict government directives. The impact on the education of young people, the burden placed on rural people caught between poverty and the grinding punishment of work hours if they moved to towns and cities to work in factories are captured in vivid accounts: in the way clothes wear and tear, in the blisters on hands and the way the bodies of young men become bare bones and stooped.
The writing does not confine itself to narrating us stories but is fleshed out well with a peek into the socio cultural norms of filial ties that Chinese society is bound by. The author’s observations on the lives of his father and two uncles and how it leads him to his questions on the nature of life and how it is different from living makes this memoir an intimate journey.
‘Three Brothers: Memories of My Family’ is a memoir of the author’s family in the backdrop of the Cultural Revolution with the focus on the lives of Lianke’s father and two of his Uncles in Song County in Henan Province. Trust Lianke to make the writing not merely about his family while taking readers to the abject poverty and the hardships faced by the common people, for he also tells us how political leaderships and the decisions they take do not take into consideration how the people on the ground live with the weight of strict government directives. The impact on the education of young people, the burden placed on rural people caught between poverty and the grinding punishment of work hours if they moved to towns and cities to work in factories are captured in vivid accounts: in the way clothes wear and tear, in the blisters on hands and the way the bodies of young men become bare bones and stooped.
The writing does not confine itself to narrating us stories but is fleshed out well with a peek into the socio cultural norms of filial ties that Chinese society is bound by. The author’s observations on the lives of his father and two uncles and how it leads him to his questions on the nature of life and how it is different from living makes this memoir an intimate journey.
April 25, 2020
From a poverty-stricken rural background, Yan Lianke went on to become one of China’s most acclaimed authors, and this memoir chronicles his early years in the Chinese countryside and his journey to success as a writer. The three brothers of the title are his father and his two brothers, all of whom led an unimaginably harsh life during the 1960s and 1970s. It was a daily struggle to simply survive and the hardships of subsistence farmers and factory workers took their toll. But what Lianke pays tribute to in this moving memoir is how the three brothers devoted their efforts to supporting the family, ultimately making it possible for Lianke himself to leave their hardscrabble existence to move away and turn himself into a writer. The book is a powerful portrait of China during these turbulent years. The poverty is almost beyond imagining. This isn’t the only memoir I have read about China during these difficult times, and the story is always the same. How somehow people did survive against all the odds and gradually saw an easier life come to them. The importance of family is key at all times and Lianke obvious feels great respect for the older generation and how hard they worked to keep the family alive and together. The book is an extraordinary portrait of China, heart-rending at times, but never bitter, and although I didn’t feel that it added anything new to an already crowded field, it still made for some powerful reading.
June 15, 2024
This was an incredible incredible book. Maybe even my favorite book of all time now. The tone was so tender and the relationships were so deep and poignant… I cried. Also, being able to understand more about life during the Cultural Revolution was so meaningful to me. So glad I picked this book up in Lello. <33
February 11, 2020
This is a wonderful book, and a very good translation. Wonderful insight into the everyday life of rural China during the Maoist Revolution. A loving tribute to the authors forefathers. I found it quite engaging.
March 29, 2020
A searingly honest memoir, beautifully written, about growing up in a poor peasant family in central China in the sixties and seventies. The three brothers are the author's father and two uncles.
December 15, 2020
Not infrequently, I'm drawn to a book for one reason and then I find myself enjoying it for a completely different one. The appeal here was a promised memoir of peasant life during the Cultural Revolution in China. Strictly speaking, that's exactly what you get.
But first and foremost, this is a heartfelt family-focused memoir, centered around the author's illiterate father and two uncles, almost completely absent any reference or awareness of the systemic influences on their struggles. Yan escaped his impoverished rural life, thanks to a voracious appetite for reading and a skill for writing. Any hint of political awareness is oblique, but there is plenty of social awareness. To Yan, a rural adolescent, his role models are simultaneously exalted pillars of strength as much as fates to be avoided. The translation for his family life used throughout the book is "peasant" – a word we'd never use for contemporaries today even for the most impoverished Appalachian families – but when looking at the stories through a wider lens, the word isn't incorrect.
Every day, First Uncle's family would wake up in the morning before dawn and travel to the river more than ten li away, where they would go to the gully on the other side of the river to collect stones. After collecting the stones they would ford the waist-deep water to return to their side of the river, and would then sell the stones to the state work units. Each day they would make two round trips – setting out each morning when the night sky was still full of stars and returning home each night when the sky was once again full of stars. Apart from the Lunar New Year and periods where there was a lot of farm work. First Uncle and his family proceeded like this, day after day, year after year. In all, they continued like this for three years, their own version of China's Three Years of Natural Disasters.
The men in Yan's father's generation were pack mules and peddlers. The story here is one of generational change and geographical inequity. To be a rural patriarch in that era was to struggle, and to do so in an environment that would offer them little personal reward and render their own values obsolete.
My father's generation struggled tirelessly for food, clothing, and housing. They struggled to build their sons their own three-room, tile-roofed houses. But now, those adobe-roofed and tile-roofed houses have gone out of style – like trees that become old and shriveled before they have a chance to become fully grown. Those houses were like children of fallen aristocrats, standing in a modern city, recalling their former lives.
Yan does little to conceal his feelings throughout. The memoir is colored by the fact that he waited to write this when he was older. He regularly alludes to his own past failings in understanding and appreciating his father's generation and their struggles. And he nicely walks a line, expressing admiration and even reverence for his elders while at the same time concealing little of their moral failings.
The most compelling history is probably that of Fourth Uncle, a man who struck out to escape the rural poverty trap by becoming, in essence, a migrant laborer. He spent his working years away from his family, working for a construction company, and his relative success in obtaining a better income made him an idol for young Lianke. Fourth Uncle was the first page of that book I wanted to open. Fourth Uncle was also the first page of the happy life for which I yearned. But Fourth Uncle struggled every bit as much as his brothers, not only with earning enough money, but also in shouldering the burdens of both urban and rural life, belonging to neither place.
Yan's own eventual escape from rural poverty – the luxury that he was able to tell this tale in the first place – likely compounds his own feelings of regret and guilt about the struggles of these men. Yan is writing about ghosts in more ways than one.
Ultimately, through the histories of these three brothers, we do get a picture of the powerlessness endured by a generation of Chinese men during this moment in history. This is not a political book, but the political and economic forces that constrained the family are evident to any reader. And the structure of the memoir, to delve into the lives of each brother, is effective. If there is a failing here, it's the unabashed omission of any female perspective. In any world where the men are powerless, you had better believe the women are even more so.
I also rather enjoyed the writing. I can imagine the difficulty of translating from the Chinese, a language distant enough from English to present styles and idioms that have no clear parallel (a brownish-purple fear). Sometimes the literal translations don't fly (The train station was as cold and empty as a barren field, but the tracks stretched into the night like a pair of fried dough sticks.) but that just goes with the territory. A book can only go so far to put ourselves in the shoes of a people and culture so remote from our own perspective, but that is always a struggle worth pursuing. In that light, it's wonderful that a book like this is translated and distributed in English. Lianke's father and uncles would be amazed that I read about their lives.
But first and foremost, this is a heartfelt family-focused memoir, centered around the author's illiterate father and two uncles, almost completely absent any reference or awareness of the systemic influences on their struggles. Yan escaped his impoverished rural life, thanks to a voracious appetite for reading and a skill for writing. Any hint of political awareness is oblique, but there is plenty of social awareness. To Yan, a rural adolescent, his role models are simultaneously exalted pillars of strength as much as fates to be avoided. The translation for his family life used throughout the book is "peasant" – a word we'd never use for contemporaries today even for the most impoverished Appalachian families – but when looking at the stories through a wider lens, the word isn't incorrect.
Every day, First Uncle's family would wake up in the morning before dawn and travel to the river more than ten li away, where they would go to the gully on the other side of the river to collect stones. After collecting the stones they would ford the waist-deep water to return to their side of the river, and would then sell the stones to the state work units. Each day they would make two round trips – setting out each morning when the night sky was still full of stars and returning home each night when the sky was once again full of stars. Apart from the Lunar New Year and periods where there was a lot of farm work. First Uncle and his family proceeded like this, day after day, year after year. In all, they continued like this for three years, their own version of China's Three Years of Natural Disasters.
The men in Yan's father's generation were pack mules and peddlers. The story here is one of generational change and geographical inequity. To be a rural patriarch in that era was to struggle, and to do so in an environment that would offer them little personal reward and render their own values obsolete.
My father's generation struggled tirelessly for food, clothing, and housing. They struggled to build their sons their own three-room, tile-roofed houses. But now, those adobe-roofed and tile-roofed houses have gone out of style – like trees that become old and shriveled before they have a chance to become fully grown. Those houses were like children of fallen aristocrats, standing in a modern city, recalling their former lives.
Yan does little to conceal his feelings throughout. The memoir is colored by the fact that he waited to write this when he was older. He regularly alludes to his own past failings in understanding and appreciating his father's generation and their struggles. And he nicely walks a line, expressing admiration and even reverence for his elders while at the same time concealing little of their moral failings.
The most compelling history is probably that of Fourth Uncle, a man who struck out to escape the rural poverty trap by becoming, in essence, a migrant laborer. He spent his working years away from his family, working for a construction company, and his relative success in obtaining a better income made him an idol for young Lianke. Fourth Uncle was the first page of that book I wanted to open. Fourth Uncle was also the first page of the happy life for which I yearned. But Fourth Uncle struggled every bit as much as his brothers, not only with earning enough money, but also in shouldering the burdens of both urban and rural life, belonging to neither place.
Yan's own eventual escape from rural poverty – the luxury that he was able to tell this tale in the first place – likely compounds his own feelings of regret and guilt about the struggles of these men. Yan is writing about ghosts in more ways than one.
Ultimately, through the histories of these three brothers, we do get a picture of the powerlessness endured by a generation of Chinese men during this moment in history. This is not a political book, but the political and economic forces that constrained the family are evident to any reader. And the structure of the memoir, to delve into the lives of each brother, is effective. If there is a failing here, it's the unabashed omission of any female perspective. In any world where the men are powerless, you had better believe the women are even more so.
I also rather enjoyed the writing. I can imagine the difficulty of translating from the Chinese, a language distant enough from English to present styles and idioms that have no clear parallel (a brownish-purple fear). Sometimes the literal translations don't fly (The train station was as cold and empty as a barren field, but the tracks stretched into the night like a pair of fried dough sticks.) but that just goes with the territory. A book can only go so far to put ourselves in the shoes of a people and culture so remote from our own perspective, but that is always a struggle worth pursuing. In that light, it's wonderful that a book like this is translated and distributed in English. Lianke's father and uncles would be amazed that I read about their lives.
April 15, 2022
Minirecension: Tre Bröder handlar om Yan Liankes familj och uppväxt i 70-talets Kina. Han skildrar landsbygden och fattigdomen, där inget förskönas men samtidigt beskrivs med ett sådant poetiskt språk att man nästan får dåligt samvete. Det handlar om honom, som fick gå i skolan och sedan blev soldat, men vars stora dröm egentligen var att skriva. Det handlar om uppväxten, men det handlar också om hans far och hans två farbröder, som alla hanterade livet så olika men som kämpade för att senare generationer skulle få det bättre.
Jag gillade verkligen denna memoar! Den påminde om Annie Ernaux, om Édouard Louis, men vi fick lära oss mer om kulturrevolutionen och hur livet var för bönderna i Kina strax innan allt plötsligt moderniserades. Jag gillade språket. Jag gillade hur personerna porträtterades. Jag gillade att Lianke vågade visa sina mindre smickrande sidor. Allt kändes mänskligt.
Jag gillade verkligen denna memoar! Den påminde om Annie Ernaux, om Édouard Louis, men vi fick lära oss mer om kulturrevolutionen och hur livet var för bönderna i Kina strax innan allt plötsligt moderniserades. Jag gillade språket. Jag gillade hur personerna porträtterades. Jag gillade att Lianke vågade visa sina mindre smickrande sidor. Allt kändes mänskligt.
April 18, 2020
A detailed reflection on the austere conditions governing daily life in rural China, “Three Brothers” is a heartrending memoir by one of China’s most celebrated authors.
April 11, 2020
Beautifully written account of three brothers seen through the eyes of a son and nephew. Lianke is one of China’s acclaimed novelists and the story of his two uncles and his father in rural China from the 60’s to the present day is an emotional and powerful story.
December 26, 2025
前段时间翻看纽约客知道了阎连科，又在图书馆看到了这本家族传记。关于外公外婆那一辈人的生活和过去我其实是很没有概念的，只知道他们年轻的时候非常得不容易，但那印象是虚无缥缈的，参杂着历史书里干瘪的甚至有些故意模糊的描述。书里对父辈三兄弟一生的描写给我展现了一个陌生的中国：很残忍，很苦，但又很坚强。中国社会亏欠农民太多太多，从过去到现在，一直在牺牲他们（城市真的是变态的吸血鬼），在可以预见的未来这种牺牲也一直在延续。生活还是活着，有时候并不能自由地去选择。
July 19, 2024
I am still in the process of reading one of Yan Lianke’s other books, but I truly appreciate his perspective. I think reading his memoir really helps me understand where he is coming from and how impactful his books are.
Separated into multiple parts, the book talks about his life and upbringing (without much information about his time in the army, sadly), before then backtracking to focus on his father and his selflessness compared to his medical condition, his father’s older brother (First Uncle) and his kindness compared to his gambling addiction, and his father’s younger brother (Fourth Uncle) and his difficulties living part-rural and part-“outside”. Each chapter is broken up into smaller parts, recounting different occurrences in Lianke’s memory, which he then dissects to ponder about suffering in life, the impact of dignity, and the fickle nature of fate.
However, the main theme in the book revolves around how the rural upbringing in China and the different lives each of the “brothers” went through to make a living in China as subsistence farmers trying to provide for their families.
It is both tragic and heartwarmning, with plenty of moments that make you consider the existential nature of life, contemplating our own existence in comparison to his family members, who grew up with filial piety and the notion of “goodness”—showering others with kindness, which Lianke hopes he too can personify in his own life. I think the one passage I will always remember is how when First Uncle visited him in Kaifeng, he cooked him a meager dish of fried egg over rice, but First Uncle considered it the best meal he’s ever tasted.
There are so many other moments of how his family helped him succeed and moments that he cherishes or remembers:
• His elder brother donating blood for a transfusion for their elder sister since he didn’t want anyone in their family donating blood
• His second sister giving up her spot in high school so he could go instead.
• Fourth Uncle refusing Lianke from working as a porter.
• Fourth Uncle giving him the polyester shirt, then he gives it back 3 years later when Fourth Uncle needs to go to a wedding and his “nice shirt” hasn’t dried yet.
• His Father carrying all the ginger stones from the hill to build a house, then wading into the freezing water despite it exacerbating his asthma, to lob stones for two additional stones.
And while there are instances where Lianke discusses the vices of these men, he does so to provide dimension, showing that not everyone is perfect.
For a translation, I also found it was well done. I found Lianke’s imagery compelling and the descriptive writing well-transcribed. The only difficulties I found were trying to follow dates and timelines, as the story is told somewhat non-linearly. Furthermore, there were a lot of details that Lianke left out, so we only have a small snapshot, but there is so much more I would love to learn!
Separated into multiple parts, the book talks about his life and upbringing (without much information about his time in the army, sadly), before then backtracking to focus on his father and his selflessness compared to his medical condition, his father’s older brother (First Uncle) and his kindness compared to his gambling addiction, and his father’s younger brother (Fourth Uncle) and his difficulties living part-rural and part-“outside”. Each chapter is broken up into smaller parts, recounting different occurrences in Lianke’s memory, which he then dissects to ponder about suffering in life, the impact of dignity, and the fickle nature of fate.
However, the main theme in the book revolves around how the rural upbringing in China and the different lives each of the “brothers” went through to make a living in China as subsistence farmers trying to provide for their families.
It is both tragic and heartwarmning, with plenty of moments that make you consider the existential nature of life, contemplating our own existence in comparison to his family members, who grew up with filial piety and the notion of “goodness”—showering others with kindness, which Lianke hopes he too can personify in his own life. I think the one passage I will always remember is how when First Uncle visited him in Kaifeng, he cooked him a meager dish of fried egg over rice, but First Uncle considered it the best meal he’s ever tasted.
There are so many other moments of how his family helped him succeed and moments that he cherishes or remembers:
• His elder brother donating blood for a transfusion for their elder sister since he didn’t want anyone in their family donating blood
• His second sister giving up her spot in high school so he could go instead.
• Fourth Uncle refusing Lianke from working as a porter.
• Fourth Uncle giving him the polyester shirt, then he gives it back 3 years later when Fourth Uncle needs to go to a wedding and his “nice shirt” hasn’t dried yet.
• His Father carrying all the ginger stones from the hill to build a house, then wading into the freezing water despite it exacerbating his asthma, to lob stones for two additional stones.
And while there are instances where Lianke discusses the vices of these men, he does so to provide dimension, showing that not everyone is perfect.
For a translation, I also found it was well done. I found Lianke’s imagery compelling and the descriptive writing well-transcribed. The only difficulties I found were trying to follow dates and timelines, as the story is told somewhat non-linearly. Furthermore, there were a lot of details that Lianke left out, so we only have a small snapshot, but there is so much more I would love to learn!
September 29, 2021
An interesting memoir about the author who was born into a peasant family in China and grew up during the country’s Cultural Revolution of the ‘60s and ‘70s. Honoring and revering his immediate and extended family are everything to him.
The “Three Brothers” story is ostensibly about his relationships with his father and two paternal uncles, but many more family members are essential to his passage from young boy to adulthood. Written originally in Chinese and translated into English, it is not an easy read. I often had to think about passages and reread them to ensure I gained full understanding.
I really enjoyed the author’s writing so reverently and lovingly about the importance of family. This was a politically tense time of massive hardship and scarcity, and they survived by supporting and sacrificing for one another. As hard-working peasants, family members lived day-to-day struggling to obtain enough food to fill their bellies, which was rarely achieved. In addition to never enough food — shelter, clothing, medicine, and education were all extremely scarce.
The peasant lifestyle is juxtaposed with “city people” who seemingly lead much easier and richer lives. The author eventually winds up in the city to learn it too requires hard work to survive.
There are many philosophical reflections where I paused to deliberate privileged American existence in comparison to the shocking conditions experienced by the Chinese during these terrible times.
The “Three Brothers” story is ostensibly about his relationships with his father and two paternal uncles, but many more family members are essential to his passage from young boy to adulthood. Written originally in Chinese and translated into English, it is not an easy read. I often had to think about passages and reread them to ensure I gained full understanding.
I really enjoyed the author’s writing so reverently and lovingly about the importance of family. This was a politically tense time of massive hardship and scarcity, and they survived by supporting and sacrificing for one another. As hard-working peasants, family members lived day-to-day struggling to obtain enough food to fill their bellies, which was rarely achieved. In addition to never enough food — shelter, clothing, medicine, and education were all extremely scarce.
The peasant lifestyle is juxtaposed with “city people” who seemingly lead much easier and richer lives. The author eventually winds up in the city to learn it too requires hard work to survive.
There are many philosophical reflections where I paused to deliberate privileged American existence in comparison to the shocking conditions experienced by the Chinese during these terrible times.
February 3, 2021
This is a good memoir, although the prose isn't really my style (kind of flowery, a lot of philosophical introspection). I'm not entirely sure what the author wants the reader to take away, but for me I just really enjoyed reading about the Cultural Revolution era through the experiences of this one young man and his relationships to his father and two uncles. I read this as a document bearing witness to the massive changes in Chinese society, particularly in rural areas, on a micro scale. The author doesn't address the policies and macro economic shifts at all, but maybe because I'm a sociologist these were always in the back of my mind as I read about the course of the author's early life and his male relatives' late lives. The book is pretty sad in a lot of ways, and it really made me appreciate the endless toil and struggle that poor rural peasants endured at the time.
July 1, 2026
My mom has talked about her experience during the Cultural Revolution, sent away from her family in Shanghai, but a large part of this memoir is of the other side of this story, which is the farming villages where the educated youth were sent to, like Yan's. From this point of view, the educated youth were a heavy drain on the village, unable to work effectively but also owed by hospitality and class the best quality food, right out of the meager stores of the villagers.
Yan also meditates on death and the meaning that it gives to living and life, considering both the repetitive day-to-day process as well as the bright potential we strive to achieve.
Yan also meditates on death and the meaning that it gives to living and life, considering both the repetitive day-to-day process as well as the bright potential we strive to achieve.
July 3, 2020
I learned a lot about China in the 70s and 80s. The poverty of Lianke's extended family living in the country side was shocking and sad. For all their daily toil, they earned less government work points than someone working in a factory. I was surprised that fathers built their sons houses (3 room houses) for them to marry. This was a matter of pride. One of his uncles hauled stones and boulders with his family through an icy river during wintertime for house construction. Lianke's desire to write started from a young age and was a seed he nourished.
August 19, 2021
This book gives the Western world a point of view that is not much publicized: that of someone who actually works/worked in the government (author was a cadre) and came from the countryside. It was fascinating to see how someone in the country viewed the urbanites exiled out to his community for re-education vs the usual narrative of dissidents. But outside of that, this is also an intensely personal story about his family members and their travails. Some parts, especially about parents and children, made me cry. A short and beautiful book, well worth the read.
November 10, 2022
3.75
Thoughtful meditations on life v living, fate, the approach of death, and truly beautiful sparse bursts of prose
Occasionally self-applauding:
Yan claims too much personal influence in the lives of his family — guilt for “causing” the death of his father, pride at irreversibly shaping the lives of others with just a word or gesture.
Over-romanticization of rural illiteracy (1st brother)
Really nice to hear the other perspective of上山下乡运动 — previously have only heard of it from the 知识青年 aka 下放青年 side
Thoughtful meditations on life v living, fate, the approach of death, and truly beautiful sparse bursts of prose
Occasionally self-applauding:
Yan claims too much personal influence in the lives of his family — guilt for “causing” the death of his father, pride at irreversibly shaping the lives of others with just a word or gesture.
Over-romanticization of rural illiteracy (1st brother)
Really nice to hear the other perspective of上山下乡运动 — previously have only heard of it from the 知识青年 aka 下放青年 side
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 21, 2020
This English language nonfiction debut one of Chinas most highly regarded writers, winner of the Franz
Kafka Prize and twice finalist for the international Booker Prize.’Three Brothers’ is a beautiful and memoir of the authors childhood and family life during the Cultural Revolution. Author #Yan Lianke paints a vivid portrait of rural China in the 1960s and ‘70s chronicling his childhood and festival days. A career in the Army ultimately allows Yan to escape village life.
Kafka Prize and twice finalist for the international Booker Prize.’Three Brothers’ is a beautiful and memoir of the authors childhood and family life during the Cultural Revolution. Author #Yan Lianke paints a vivid portrait of rural China in the 1960s and ‘70s chronicling his childhood and festival days. A career in the Army ultimately allows Yan to escape village life.
November 5, 2022
Tre bröder är en bok om fyra människoöden där författaren beskriver sitt liv, sin fars liv och hans farsbröders liv. Boken ger en inblick i hur livet kunde se ut den kinesiska landsbygden, under 1950-2000-talet. Det som framhävs som mest är skillnaden mellan staden och landsbygden på alla olika plan. Den första delen som är självbiografisk är den absolut bästa, de andra håller inte samma kvalitet.
May 10, 2020
This book is the story of life in China through the author’s eyes, his life and that of his family and their relationships. There is a lot of emotion in this book as the author describes the poverty, death, addictions and life in general. It’s very well-written and translated from Chinese, it flows well and has a nice steady pace. It was an interesting and educational read.
December 26, 2021
Jag uppskattade denna bok, även om det inte är något jag skulle rekommendera vidare.
Jag uppskattade inblicken in i det senare 90-talets kina. Det var fint att få lösa om en familjerelation.
Boken var något upprepande och alldeles för packad med metaforer och analogier för min smak. Ibland kändes det lite för krystat.
Men allt som allt är fin bok.
Jag uppskattade inblicken in i det senare 90-talets kina. Det var fint att få lösa om en familjerelation.
Boken var något upprepande och alldeles för packad med metaforer och analogier för min smak. Ibland kändes det lite för krystat.
Men allt som allt är fin bok.
April 20, 2023
“If ‘living’ is a blade of grass, then ‘life’ is a beautiful flower, and if ‘living’ is a single tree, then ‘life’ is a verdant park in the center of the city. When our society considers life, accordingly, it is always careful and meticulous, but when it considers the process of living, is approaches it extravagantly and arbitrarily, chopping away like a hatchet”
October 29, 2026
Real talk, Three Brothers: Memories of My Family is the kind of book you'll either defend at a party or throw across the room. I did a little of both. Yan, Lianke takes big swings, and some land hard, like the opening chapter that gutted me, while others whiff completely. The narrator's attitude gets exhausting after a while. For readers who like a book with some bite. Pass if you prefer your stories polite.
November 2, 2026
Straight up, the best part of Three Brothers: Memories of My Family is a single conversation about halfway through. Lianke Yan puts two people in a room and lets the tension do everything. The rest is good, that one scene is great. Worth reading for that alone, though plot-hungry folks might get restless.
September 22, 2021
I love learning about China, especially the 1950s - 1990s. I've been fascinated since I read "The Good Earth" as a little girl (yes, that was from a much earlier point in time). So this book accomplished that - adding to my understanding of China, though it was a bit ponderous for my taste.
October 12, 2023
informative
We learn much about life in China but the author’s retrospection becomes tedious at times. I appreciated his desire to convey the hardships of life for the peasant and the extreme sacrifices that they all made but sometimes the reading became laborious.
We learn much about life in China but the author’s retrospection becomes tedious at times. I appreciated his desire to convey the hardships of life for the peasant and the extreme sacrifices that they all made but sometimes the reading became laborious.
May 15, 2024
This book provides a great look into the lives of a rural peasant family during the Cultural Revolution who actually supported Mao. The translation from Chinese to English can be slightly confusing at times, but definitely worth the read for a different perspective.
September 1, 2025
Amazing memoir and I usually don't like biographies. It is very well written and a good snapshot into another culture and time and level of hardship that many of us cannot even imagine. It makes you ver grateful for what you have
August 7, 2026
阎连科在国内不算超级有名的作家，很多书在大陆好像找不太到书源，我也是偶然发现这个作家。读了这本书的自序完全勾起了我对这个作家的兴趣。他早期似乎取得了一些成就，出版了一些作品，在村子里也是全家的骄傲。但自序里隐晦地讲到他的写作似乎脱缰了，走上了一条不被大众所接纳的路，家人企图劝阻他，他却发现自己无法放弃这条路，只会这么写。我查了一下，原来他的一些作品以荒诞写法讽刺和批判政府，虽然他本人没有收到驱逐出境、监禁类的处罚，但在文学出版界一定程度上境遇窘迫，很多作品被禁。
说回这本书，这本书并不是他的一本小说代表作，而是他六十岁写的一本关于童年、爸爸、大伯和四叔的回忆录。读完这本书我的一些想法：
1. 全书我最喜欢的并不是他对父辈的一些描述和回顾，而是回顾他青少年时期的第一章《我的那年代》。尤其是在中国近代史很关键的时期，他的回忆记录了一个农村孩子在历史大背景下的亲身经历，有幽默、无奈、温情、心酸，充满真实的细节。比如：拿到禁书《红楼梦》的偷偷摸摸和欣喜若狂；知青下乡带来了资源，农民不让他们真的做什么劳动，还轮流亏钱给他们做好吃的；知青和村民之间两起相反的案件反映的对下乡人的不公待遇；不知道中国有哪些大学导致第一年高考恢复全村全部落考；以前社会浓重的政治色彩--居然第一年恢复高考的作文考题是《我的心飞到了毛主席纪念堂》。
2. 关于他的父辈，他们等于是我的爷爷辈，是百分百的中国人，而且也不是城市人，和我可谓有很多层文化代沟，从作者的回忆录中我虽然能体会到他们的一些美德，比如勤劳坚韧，为家人付出，但也能明显感觉到文化差异。比如：他们极其看重孝顺，觉得人活着最最不能辜负的是父母，而当今新潮观念提倡父母生下孩子不应该是为了回报；父辈很讲面子，看重排场，就算很穷，办婚礼办后事也要风风光光；父辈讲究宁可亏待自己人也不能亏待亲戚，大伯分糖最后才分给自己的孩子。书中写到的很多做法我也不完全认可，比如姐姐因为自己是女性主动让出读书机会；妈妈把作者辛苦写的书稿烧了；大伯嗜赌成性，经常几天亏损全家人极其辛苦地劳作一年的收成。总体整本书反反复复透露出浓厚的愧疚之情，那么多人对那么多人有着各种各样的愧疚。家长内疚苦了孩子，孩子内疚不够孝顺父母。这种情感让我这个读者读多了说实话有点心累，感觉以前人给自己背负的情感枷锁和道德绑架太沉重，过度内耗。但另一方面也觉得这些都很真实，反应了一代老农民的传统观念。
3. 书中的一些心理思维描写得很真实，很让人心酸，比如爸爸病重不愿向命运低头，总想着方法向死神讨多点时间；爸爸辛苦几年耕地，土地终于肥沃后收到土地归公的政策；大伯终其一生为了能让孩子结婚辛苦建的三间瓦房被时代淘汰了，他常回去门口坐坐；作者想去当兵时，虽然这意味着家里会少了一个极其重要的劳动力和收入来源，但爸爸还是咬牙支持他去；作者总想为爸爸写点什么，但爸爸去世后三年，五年，却始终拖延，仿佛感触越深的题材越动不了笔；家族里几个孩子不幸年少去世后父辈极其隐忍的痛苦；四叔在城市打工，被农民羡慕境遇和工资，唯有作者和他一起工作后才体察到他的不易。
总结一句话：“我是在充满贫穷与温情的家庭长大的。”
～摘抄～
“回来了……吃饭去吧……” 这是父亲一生对我说的最后一句话。就在这句话后不到一个时辰的时间里，父亲就在我的怀里去世了，历尽了他辛劳、凡俗的一生，宛若一枚叶子落下时，如何用力和挣扎，那落叶的生成和旋转，都没有和别的落叶形成区别样。
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我一夜未眠。想着明天就要考试，如同我要在明天金榜题名一般。兴奋如了那时我不曾有过的朦胧爱情，完完整整地伴我一夜，直至来日到校。教室外面的日光，一团一圆，从窗外漏落入教室以内，张致澈丽，使教室里的明亮，如同阳光下的湖水。高大庙堂里木梁上的菩萨神画，醒目地附在屋顶和墙壁的上空。老师在讲台上看着我们。我扭头看了一眼同桌，从她的眼神，我看到她有些紧张，看到了她对我超越于她的一种担心和拼比。
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话是午饭时候父亲从门外带进家的。那是夏天，知了的叫声，在树枝上作张作致，泼烦泼乱，叫得密不透风。父亲坐在我家的院里，说了我和二姐只有一人可以上学读书的景况后，他看着我和二姐，有些为难，又有些犹豫踌躇地说，家里的情况，你们也都明白，人多嘴多，谁都必须吃饭，又要给你们大姐看病。这样，也是确实需要你们有一个留在家里种地，挣些工分。父亲说完，我和二姐在那个时候都端着饭碗，僵在父亲面前，谁都没有说话。有一瞬间，时间生硬，再也不会如水样细软地流动。命运在那时冰明水亮地冷在了我和二姐之间，就像时间成了石块冰坨，无形地砌压在了我家的院内。
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也就终日地等着等着，直等到下一学期，已经早已忘了此事，他却在某一天里，从书包里取出一个报纸裹了几层的书本样神秘东西，把我拉到一边塞进了我的手里。我欲打开看时，竟吓了他一个满脸惨白。于是，我忙又合上，藏进我的书包，躲进厕所，到没人时候才打开那个神秘东西，见是一本书。果然，浅白的封皮上，赫然印着“红楼梦”三个大字。而在那小说的封底，果真印着“供内部阅读”五个小字。当时不知为何，我喜出望外，又战战兢兢；满头大汗，却又双手哆嗦，慌忙地把那小说快速地重又裹好，急急地藏进了我的书包。[...]
那个下午的课堂上，我没有听进老师讲的任何词语，一心想着那本“红楼之梦”，就像一心想着我一生想要见的我最钟爱的一个情人。 那个暑假，为了挣钱，为了给大姐治病，我同二姐起早贪黑，到十几里外的一条山沟，用板车往建在我们村的县水泥厂里运送料石；给修公路的承包队，从河滩上运送鸡蛋大小的鹅卵石子；给盖房子的村街上的商业部门，运送地基石头。白天无休止地汗流浃背、气喘吁吁，人累得如同多病的牛马。可在晚上，看《红楼梦》小说，却能醉醉痴痴，直至天亮。看到黛玉葬花、黛玉之死和宝玉出家，常是泪流满面，唏嘘感叹。
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因为我的叔伯哥哥，回家结婚去了，给我留下了独占一屋的空间。可在某天动笔的时候，方才猛地发现，因为每天在山上搬石头抡锤，往车上铲装石渣，铁镐的把儿和我缝了几层补丁的裤腿，时时挤压着我握铁锹把儿的右手手指，使我的右手指头，已经完全扭曲变形，如同树枝一样干枯弯曲，让我无论如何，都无法再握那细滑的钢笔。发现手指无法握笔的时候，望着干硬的指头，我惘然不知所措，有些想哭，又觉得坦然。试着用左手握笔，却又依然不能写字，就再用右手生硬地握着，生硬地在纸上写着，直到可以把字写得有些像字了为止。
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三年的三个冬天，我们家的那块土地彻底地翻拣完了。家里山墙下堆的黄色的礓石，足够砌三间房的两面山墙，而田头沟底倒堆的礓石也足有家里的几倍之多。你不敢相信一块地里会有那么多的礓石。你终于知道那块比原来大了许多的自留地，其实都是从礓石的缝中翻拣出来的，也许七分，也许八分，也许有一亩见余。总之，那块田地对几岁的你来说，犹如一片广场，平整、松软，散发着深红香甜的土腥，就是你在田地里翻筋斗、打滚儿，也不会有一点儿坚硬划破你的一丝皮儿。因此，你似乎懂得了一些劳作和土地的意义，懂得了父亲在这个世上生存的意义。似乎明白，作为农民，人生中的全部苦乐，都在土地之上，都扎根在土地之中，都与劳作息息相关。或者说，土地与劳作，是农民人生的一切苦乐之源。
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哪怕只有三五百字。然果真到了父亲入土为安之后，我携着妻子，从豫西嵩县那个偏穷的田湖小镇回到豫东古都的一座军营后，随着工作，随着我新婚的一些喜悦和我对文学的痴醉热爱，在父亲灵前跪着的浓重许诺，都慢慢地散淡远离。偶尔地记起，我对失诺后良心上淡淡的不安也有自慰的解释：到三周年写吧，三周年是乡俗中一个大的祭日。可过了三年，忽然接到了哥哥的一封来信，说父亲的三周年已经过了，他和姐姐及叔伯弟兄们都去父亲的坟上添了新土，这时我才有些慌手乱心，有些措手不及的疚愧。那一天在下班之后，在同事们都离开办公室之后，我独自坐在空荡荡的办公室里，把哥哥的来信放在办公桌上，望着冬日窗外的杨树和流荡在杨树枝条间叮咚的鸟鸣，听着偶留的枯叶在飘落时如擦肩而过的月光的声响，我的泪把哥哥的来信滴湿了好大一片。时间因泪水和不安在我的愧悔中缓缓过去，我就那么静静呆呆地坐着，悔思省过，愧疚不安，直到午饭之后，到了办公楼里又响起上班的脚步声，到了我年满两岁的孩子到办公室来唤我吃饭，我才从静静呆呆中醒明过来。在从办公室回家的路上，望着鲜活的世界，望着走在路上充满生气的人们，我思念着父亲，不停地把头扭到一边擦着眼泪，不停地拿手在我孩子的头上莫名地抚来摸去，不停地对自己说：待父亲十周年时，我若再不为父亲的一生写点儿什么，为父亲的死做点儿什么，我就不是他的儿子，我就不得好死！然而，又有许多年头越过之后，我依旧没有想起父亲是哪一天生日、哪一天忌日，也没有记起要为父亲写点儿什么、做点儿什么的心跪泪诺，和走在一条干涸的河旁，想不起那河道当年也有水流一样。
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不消说，父亲是抱着对治愈的极大期望来住院的。在最初的半个月，因为医院御寒温暖，也因为他的精神好，病似乎果然轻了。那半个月的时光，是我这一生回忆起来最感自慰、最感温馨的短暂而美好的日月。因为，那是我这辈子于父亲唯一一次尽孝床头的两个星期。每天，我顶着北风，走四五里路去给父亲送饭，一路上都哼着戏词或歌曲。一次，我去送夜饭时，父亲、母亲不在病房，而我在露天电影场找到了他们，见他们在寒冷里聚精会神地看着电影，我的心里便漫溢过了许多欢乐和幸福，以为父亲的病果然是轻了，慌忙给哥、姐们挂了长途电话，把这一喜讯通告他们。父亲也以为他的病有望再愈，在看完电影回来之后，激动而又兴奋，说他多少年没有看过电影了，没想到在冬天的野外看了一场电影，也才咳了几次。
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那三间瓦房已经没人居住了，但大伯不是天冷了坐在那房前晒太阳，就是天热了坐在过道纳凉，仿佛大伯一生的劳作与盖房，就是为了让他在年老后，由那房子陪他度过晚年一样，如陪他度过晚年的轮椅、拐杖和寂寞。
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我也扭头朝外望过去，看见他的那件白衬衣和一套工作服，都风平浪静地吊在他用铁丝自制的衣架上。穿过那些衣服和树木，天空是阴郁的乌云和无风的寂静与沉默。从宿舍楼后传来的厂里的机器声，如滚山石一样沉闷而响亮。就在这一刻，我触摸到了四叔的幸福和窘迫，仿佛看到了他人生中一扇光鲜的大门后边的杂乱样，仿佛从一处关闭的花园的没落门庭走进去，放眼看到的，是铺天盖地的荒芜和衰败。迟疑一会儿，我回到另一栋我们有三个临时工同居的一间屋，拿来了三年前四叔送给我的那件“的确良”蓝格尖领花衬衫。那衬衫的衣领已经被我穿得有些毛烂了，可它洗得干净，叠得方正，素素洁洁，如同写满故事的书。 我把那蓝格衬衣又递给四叔时，四叔朝我笑了笑。那笑容黄瘦枯淡，如同深秋中飘在天空中的一片树叶。 那一天，沉郁中四叔就是穿着三年前脱下来给了我、三年后我又洗好叠好给了他的那件衬衣去参加人家婚礼的，去喝了那场他准备了许久的喜宴酒。骑着自行车消失在门前的水泥路上时，四叔就像一粒乡村的沙土，飘来落在了人家城郊的尘埃大道上。
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在我老家有着这样一句话——“长辈年纪再大也是前面挡风的树。”这话的意思是，无论老人多么年迈多病，只要他们还活着，你都觉得自己还年轻。没有特殊的意外，死亡依照生命的顺序来召唤我们时，老人会像一片林地最前排的树木一样，把来无影、去无踪，风似的死亡幽灵挡在林地外。让死亡的幽灵走不进林地里，走不到各家院落内，肆无忌惮地和别人牵扯与瓜葛。他们用他们年迈的生命和孱弱的身体，把死亡挡在林外和屋外，和死亡对话、说理、争吵和打架。他们让死亡理屈词穷了，或者甘拜下风了，那死亡就从我们身边、我们门口和属于你家的那片林地边上走掉了。反过来，死亡把老人说得理屈词穷、无言以对了，老人为了死亡不干扰下一辈的我们，他们就只能跟着死亡走去了。先走一步了。或者是，死亡要往属于你家的林地旋风一样吹来时，老人和他们抗争、打斗，最后在老人精疲力竭时，他们以他们生命中最后的力气和哀求，把死亡从门口、林边引走了，而自己也随着向死亡走去了。
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老人为了晚辈不能不先走一步了，到另外一个世界躺下来，静候着他们子女随后的跟随和团聚。[...]今天想起来，父亲走得早，纯粹是为了不让死亡踏进我家门槛干扰他的妻子和儿女，才总是守在门口或者林外面，以他多病的身体守护着我们的生命和日子，直到最后才不得不离开我们而把死亡引开去。而大伯，大伯的一生都与命运争抗，为生存奋力，在他生命最后的十年里，不与生存、命运争斗了，却与死亡打打斗斗了整十年。最后，他的突然离去，我想是他以为他把死亡打败了，死亡向他妥协了，似乎死亡向他的毅力品质表示了敬意离开了，所以大伯就松懈下来了，以为看不见死亡是死亡离开他后不在了，短时间内不会再光顾他家了。这时候，死亡朝向大伯突然而至，让大伯和我们家人都惊慌失措，猝不及防了。
说回这本书，这本书并不是他的一本小说代表作，而是他六十岁写的一本关于童年、爸爸、大伯和四叔的回忆录。读完这本书我的一些想法：
1. 全书我最喜欢的并不是他对父辈的一些描述和回顾，而是回顾他青少年时期的第一章《我的那年代》。尤其是在中国近代史很关键的时期，他的回忆记录了一个农村孩子在历史大背景下的亲身经历，有幽默、无奈、温情、心酸，充满真实的细节。比如：拿到禁书《红楼梦》的偷偷摸摸和欣喜若狂；知青下乡带来了资源，农民不让他们真的做什么劳动，还轮流亏钱给他们做好吃的；知青和村民之间两起相反的案件反映的对下乡人的不公待遇；不知道中国有哪些大学导致第一年高考恢复全村全部落考；以前社会浓重的政治色彩--居然第一年恢复高考的作文考题是《我的心飞到了毛主席纪念堂》。
2. 关于他的父辈，他们等于是我的爷爷辈，是百分百的中国人，而且也不是城市人，和我可谓有很多层文化代沟，从作者的回忆录中我虽然能体会到他们的一些美德，比如勤劳坚韧，为家人付出，但也能明显感觉到文化差异。比如：他们极其看重孝顺，觉得人活着最最不能辜负的是父母，而当今新潮观念提倡父母生下孩子不应该是为了回报；父辈很讲面子，看重排场，就算很穷，办婚礼办后事也要风风光光；父辈讲究宁可亏待自己人也不能亏待亲戚，大伯分糖最后才分给自己的孩子。书中写到的很多做法我也不完全认可，比如姐姐因为自己是女性主动让出读书机会；妈妈把作者辛苦写的书稿烧了；大伯嗜赌成性，经常几天亏损全家人极其辛苦地劳作一年的收成。总体整本书反反复复透露出浓厚的愧疚之情，那么多人对那么多人有着各种各样的愧疚。家长内疚苦了孩子，孩子内疚不够孝顺父母。这种情感让我这个读者读多了说实话有点心累，感觉以前人给自己背负的情感枷锁和道德绑架太沉重，过度内耗。但另一方面也觉得这些都很真实，反应了一代老农民的传统观念。
3. 书中的一些心理思维描写得很真实，很让人心酸，比如爸爸病重不愿向命运低头，总想着方法向死神讨多点时间；爸爸辛苦几年耕地，土地终于肥沃后收到土地归公的政策；大伯终其一生为了能让孩子结婚辛苦建的三间瓦房被时代淘汰了，他常回去门口坐坐；作者想去当兵时，虽然这意味着家里会少了一个极其重要的劳动力和收入来源，但爸爸还是咬牙支持他去；作者总想为爸爸写点什么，但爸爸去世后三年，五年，却始终拖延，仿佛感触越深的题材越动不了笔；家族里几个孩子不幸年少去世后父辈极其隐忍的痛苦；四叔在城市打工，被农民羡慕境遇和工资，唯有作者和他一起工作后才体察到他的不易。
总结一句话：“我是在充满贫穷与温情的家庭长大的。”
～摘抄～
“回来了……吃饭去吧……” 这是父亲一生对我说的最后一句话。就在这句话后不到一个时辰的时间里，父亲就在我的怀里去世了，历尽了他辛劳、凡俗的一生，宛若一枚叶子落下时，如何用力和挣扎，那落叶的生成和旋转，都没有和别的落叶形成区别样。
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我一夜未眠。想着明天就要考试，如同我要在明天金榜题名一般。兴奋如了那时我不曾有过的朦胧爱情，完完整整地伴我一夜，直至来日到校。教室外面的日光，一团一圆，从窗外漏落入教室以内，张致澈丽，使教室里的明亮，如同阳光下的湖水。高大庙堂里木梁上的菩萨神画，醒目地附在屋顶和墙壁的上空。老师在讲台上看着我们。我扭头看了一眼同桌，从她的眼神，我看到她有些紧张，看到了她对我超越于她的一种担心和拼比。
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话是午饭时候父亲从门外带进家的。那是夏天，知了的叫声，在树枝上作张作致，泼烦泼乱，叫得密不透风。父亲坐在我家的院里，说了我和二姐只有一人可以上学读书的景况后，他看着我和二姐，有些为难，又有些犹豫踌躇地说，家里的情况，你们也都明白，人多嘴多，谁都必须吃饭，又要给你们大姐看病。这样，也是确实需要你们有一个留在家里种地，挣些工分。父亲说完，我和二姐在那个时候都端着饭碗，僵在父亲面前，谁都没有说话。有一瞬间，时间生硬，再也不会如水样细软地流动。命运在那时冰明水亮地冷在了我和二姐之间，就像时间成了石块冰坨，无形地砌压在了我家的院内。
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也就终日地等着等着，直等到下一学期，已经早已忘了此事，他却在某一天里，从书包里取出一个报纸裹了几层的书本样神秘东西，把我拉到一边塞进了我的手里。我欲打开看时，竟吓了他一个满脸惨白。于是，我忙又合上，藏进我的书包，躲进厕所，到没人时候才打开那个神秘东西，见是一本书。果然，浅白的封皮上，赫然印着“红楼梦”三个大字。而在那小说的封底，果真印着“供内部阅读”五个小字。当时不知为何，我喜出望外，又战战兢兢；满头大汗，却又双手哆嗦，慌忙地把那小说快速地重又裹好，急急地藏进了我的书包。[...]
那个下午的课堂上，我没有听进老师讲的任何词语，一心想着那本“红楼之梦”，就像一心想着我一生想要见的我最钟爱的一个情人。 那个暑假，为了挣钱，为了给大姐治病，我同二姐起早贪黑，到十几里外的一条山沟，用板车往建在我们村的县水泥厂里运送料石；给修公路的承包队，从河滩上运送鸡蛋大小的鹅卵石子；给盖房子的村街上的商业部门，运送地基石头。白天无休止地汗流浃背、气喘吁吁，人累得如同多病的牛马。可在晚上，看《红楼梦》小说，却能醉醉痴痴，直至天亮。看到黛玉葬花、黛玉之死和宝玉出家，常是泪流满面，唏嘘感叹。
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因为我的叔伯哥哥，回家结婚去了，给我留下了独占一屋的空间。可在某天动笔的时候，方才猛地发现，因为每天在山上搬石头抡锤，往车上铲装石渣，铁镐的把儿和我缝了几层补丁的裤腿，时时挤压着我握铁锹把儿的右手手指，使我的右手指头，已经完全扭曲变形，如同树枝一样干枯弯曲，让我无论如何，都无法再握那细滑的钢笔。发现手指无法握笔的时候，望着干硬的指头，我惘然不知所措，有些想哭，又觉得坦然。试着用左手握笔，却又依然不能写字，就再用右手生硬地握着，生硬地在纸上写着，直到可以把字写得有些像字了为止。
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三年的三个冬天，我们家的那块土地彻底地翻拣完了。家里山墙下堆的黄色的礓石，足够砌三间房的两面山墙，而田头沟底倒堆的礓石也足有家里的几倍之多。你不敢相信一块地里会有那么多的礓石。你终于知道那块比原来大了许多的自留地，其实都是从礓石的缝中翻拣出来的，也许七分，也许八分，也许有一亩见余。总之，那块田地对几岁的你来说，犹如一片广场，平整、松软，散发着深红香甜的土腥，就是你在田地里翻筋斗、打滚儿，也不会有一点儿坚硬划破你的一丝皮儿。因此，你似乎懂得了一些劳作和土地的意义，懂得了父亲在这个世上生存的意义。似乎明白，作为农民，人生中的全部苦乐，都在土地之上，都扎根在土地之中，都与劳作息息相关。或者说，土地与劳作，是农民人生的一切苦乐之源。
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哪怕只有三五百字。然果真到了父亲入土为安之后，我携着妻子，从豫西嵩县那个偏穷的田湖小镇回到豫东古都的一座军营后，随着工作，随着我新婚的一些喜悦和我对文学的痴醉热爱，在父亲灵前跪着的浓重许诺，都慢慢地散淡远离。偶尔地记起，我对失诺后良心上淡淡的不安也有自慰的解释：到三周年写吧，三周年是乡俗中一个大的祭日。可过了三年，忽然接到了哥哥的一封来信，说父亲的三周年已经过了，他和姐姐及叔伯弟兄们都去父亲的坟上添了新土，这时我才有些慌手乱心，有些措手不及的疚愧。那一天在下班之后，在同事们都离开办公室之后，我独自坐在空荡荡的办公室里，把哥哥的来信放在办公桌上，望着冬日窗外的杨树和流荡在杨树枝条间叮咚的鸟鸣，听着偶留的枯叶在飘落时如擦肩而过的月光的声响，我的泪把哥哥的来信滴湿了好大一片。时间因泪水和不安在我的愧悔中缓缓过去，我就那么静静呆呆地坐着，悔思省过，愧疚不安，直到午饭之后，到了办公楼里又响起上班的脚步声，到了我年满两岁的孩子到办公室来唤我吃饭，我才从静静呆呆中醒明过来。在从办公室回家的路上，望着鲜活的世界，望着走在路上充满生气的人们，我思念着父亲，不停地把头扭到一边擦着眼泪，不停地拿手在我孩子的头上莫名地抚来摸去，不停地对自己说：待父亲十周年时，我若再不为父亲的一生写点儿什么，为父亲的死做点儿什么，我就不是他的儿子，我就不得好死！然而，又有许多年头越过之后，我依旧没有想起父亲是哪一天生日、哪一天忌日，也没有记起要为父亲写点儿什么、做点儿什么的心跪泪诺，和走在一条干涸的河旁，想不起那河道当年也有水流一样。
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不消说，父亲是抱着对治愈的极大期望来住院的。在最初的半个月，因为医院御寒温暖，也因为他的精神好，病似乎果然轻了。那半个月的时光，是我这一生回忆起来最感自慰、最感温馨的短暂而美好的日月。因为，那是我这辈子于父亲唯一一次尽孝床头的两个星期。每天，我顶着北风，走四五里路去给父亲送饭，一路上都哼着戏词或歌曲。一次，我去送夜饭时，父亲、母亲不在病房，而我在露天电影场找到了他们，见他们在寒冷里聚精会神地看着电影，我的心里便漫溢过了许多欢乐和幸福，以为父亲的病果然是轻了，慌忙给哥、姐们挂了长途电话，把这一喜讯通告他们。父亲也以为他的病有望再愈，在看完电影回来之后，激动而又兴奋，说他多少年没有看过电影了，没想到在冬天的野外看了一场电影，也才咳了几次。
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那三间瓦房已经没人居住了，但大伯不是天冷了坐在那房前晒太阳，就是天热了坐在过道纳凉，仿佛大伯一生的劳作与盖房，就是为了让他在年老后，由那房子陪他度过晚年一样，如陪他度过晚年的轮椅、拐杖和寂寞。
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我也扭头朝外望过去，看见他的那件白衬衣和一套工作服，都风平浪静地吊在他用铁丝自制的衣架上。穿过那些衣服和树木，天空是阴郁的乌云和无风的寂静与沉默。从宿舍楼后传来的厂里的机器声，如滚山石一样沉闷而响亮。就在这一刻，我触摸到了四叔的幸福和窘迫，仿佛看到了他人生中一扇光鲜的大门后边的杂乱样，仿佛从一处关闭的花园的没落门庭走进去，放眼看到的，是铺天盖地的荒芜和衰败。迟疑一会儿，我回到另一栋我们有三个临时工同居的一间屋，拿来了三年前四叔送给我的那件“的确良”蓝格尖领花衬衫。那衬衫的衣领已经被我穿得有些毛烂了，可它洗得干净，叠得方正，素素洁洁，如同写满故事的书。 我把那蓝格衬衣又递给四叔时，四叔朝我笑了笑。那笑容黄瘦枯淡，如同深秋中飘在天空中的一片树叶。 那一天，沉郁中四叔就是穿着三年前脱下来给了我、三年后我又洗好叠好给了他的那件衬衣去参加人家婚礼的，去喝了那场他准备了许久的喜宴酒。骑着自行车消失在门前的水泥路上时，四叔就像一粒乡村的沙土，飘来落在了人家城郊的尘埃大道上。
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在我老家有着这样一句话——“长辈年纪再大也是前面挡风的树。”这话的意思是，无论老人多么年迈多病，只要他们还活着，你都觉得自己还年轻。没有特殊的意外，死亡依照生命的顺序来召唤我们时，老人会像一片林地最前排的树木一样，把来无影、去无踪，风似的死亡幽灵挡在林地外。让死亡的幽灵走不进林地里，走不到各家院落内，肆无忌惮地和别人牵扯与瓜葛。他们用他们年迈的生命和孱弱的身体，把死亡挡在林外和屋外，和死亡对话、说理、争吵和打架。他们让死亡理屈词穷了，或者甘拜下风了，那死亡就从我们身边、我们门口和属于你家的那片林地边上走掉了。反过来，死亡把老人说得理屈词穷、无言以对了，老人为了死亡不干扰下一辈的我们，他们就只能跟着死亡走去了。先走一步了。或者是，死亡要往属于你家的林地旋风一样吹来时，老人和他们抗争、打斗，最后在老人精疲力竭时，他们以他们生命中最后的力气和哀求，把死亡从门口、林边引走了，而自己也随着向死亡走去了。
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老人为了晚辈不能不先走一步了，到另外一个世界躺下来，静候着他们子女随后的跟随和团聚。[...]今天想起来，父亲走得早，纯粹是为了不让死亡踏进我家门槛干扰他的妻子和儿女，才总是守在门口或者林外面，以他多病的身体守护着我们的生命和日子，直到最后才不得不离开我们而把死亡引开去。而大伯，大伯的一生都与命运争抗，为生存奋力，在他生命最后的十年里，不与生存、命运争斗了，却与死亡打打斗斗了整十年。最后，他的突然离去，我想是他以为他把死亡打败了，死亡向他妥协了，似乎死亡向他的毅力品质表示了敬意离开了，所以大伯就松懈下来了，以为看不见死亡是死亡离开他后不在了，短时间内不会再光顾他家了。这时候，死亡朝向大伯突然而至，让大伯和我们家人都惊慌失措，猝不及防了。
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