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How To Bury Your Brother
Her brother's letters reveal everything--if only he'd written one to her.
Alice always thought she'd see her brother again. Rob ran away when he was fifteen, with so many years left to find his way home. But his funeral happened first.
Now that she has to clear out her childhood home in Georgia, the memories come flooding in, bringing with them an autopsy report showing her family's lies-and sealed, addressed letters from Rob.
In a search for answers to questions she's always been afraid to ask, Alice delivers the letters. Each dares her to open her eyes to her family's dark past-and her own role in it. But it's the last letter, addressed to her brother's final home in New Orleans, that will force her to choose if she'll let the secrets break her or finally bring her home.
Everything I Never Told You meets The Night Olivia Fell set against a vivid Southern backdrop, How to Bury Your Brother follows a sister coming to terms with the mystery behind her brother's disappearance and death.
Alice always thought she'd see her brother again. Rob ran away when he was fifteen, with so many years left to find his way home. But his funeral happened first.
Now that she has to clear out her childhood home in Georgia, the memories come flooding in, bringing with them an autopsy report showing her family's lies-and sealed, addressed letters from Rob.
In a search for answers to questions she's always been afraid to ask, Alice delivers the letters. Each dares her to open her eyes to her family's dark past-and her own role in it. But it's the last letter, addressed to her brother's final home in New Orleans, that will force her to choose if she'll let the secrets break her or finally bring her home.
Everything I Never Told You meets The Night Olivia Fell set against a vivid Southern backdrop, How to Bury Your Brother follows a sister coming to terms with the mystery behind her brother's disappearance and death.
384 pages, Kindle Edition
First published May 12, 2020
118 people are currently reading
3000 people want to read
About the author
Lindsey Rogers Cook
2 books86 followersLindsey writes about the secrets, dysfunctions and love within families, both born and chosen. She's from Georgia and writes about the South. How to Bury Your Brother is her first novel.
She's also a senior editor for digital storytelling at The New York Times, and previously worked as the data editor for news at U.S. News & World Report.
She lives in Hoboken, NJ with her husband and two fetch-loving cats.
She's also a senior editor for digital storytelling at The New York Times, and previously worked as the data editor for news at U.S. News & World Report.
She lives in Hoboken, NJ with her husband and two fetch-loving cats.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 185 reviews
May 13, 2020
Alice's older brother ran away when he was fifteen years old. Alice always thought that she would see him again, she even thinks from time to time that she sees him on the street....
After his funeral, Alice cleans out her family home and finds a box of letters addressed to various people, some she knows and some she does not. One question she wants to know is why there was no letter for her. Alice begins to deliver the letters and begins to slowly learn certain truths about her brother, her family, and even herself.
Although we really do not see Rob much in this story - apart from the very beginning, the Author does a great job of giving us a glimpse into his life, his thoughts, and actions. As Alice begins to deliver the letters, she learns her brother's reasons for running away, truths about his death and some family secrets.
I found this to be a thought provoking and well written book. Like Alice, I was curious about the letters and why he chose to write to the people he did. I also enjoyed watching as Alice became more determined and made some important decisions about her life as well. A gripping tale about relationships, family, secrets, illness, love and death.
Thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions are my own.
After his funeral, Alice cleans out her family home and finds a box of letters addressed to various people, some she knows and some she does not. One question she wants to know is why there was no letter for her. Alice begins to deliver the letters and begins to slowly learn certain truths about her brother, her family, and even herself.
Although we really do not see Rob much in this story - apart from the very beginning, the Author does a great job of giving us a glimpse into his life, his thoughts, and actions. As Alice begins to deliver the letters, she learns her brother's reasons for running away, truths about his death and some family secrets.
I found this to be a thought provoking and well written book. Like Alice, I was curious about the letters and why he chose to write to the people he did. I also enjoyed watching as Alice became more determined and made some important decisions about her life as well. A gripping tale about relationships, family, secrets, illness, love and death.
Thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions are my own.
September 13, 2020
For such an affecting subject, the author seemed to bury the emotions.
I love Southern fiction and family dramas, these elements drew me in. I also enjoy seeing characters through other’s eyes which is why I found the main character’s quest to know her brother through the letters he left behind to be the strongest element of the narrative.
You taught me so much…That if you keep a box of secrets in your mind, it will only grow to define you. That you can’t untangle yourself from those who stamped their dreams, their ambitions, their personalities and their love on you.
I found the rest of the book, though, rather lifeless. The glacial pace, the infidelity subplot and the hints of secrets delivered with a ball ping hammer took the verve out of the writing. This is a debut and while the elements were here, I found this more stylistic than stirring.
I love Southern fiction and family dramas, these elements drew me in. I also enjoy seeing characters through other’s eyes which is why I found the main character’s quest to know her brother through the letters he left behind to be the strongest element of the narrative.
You taught me so much…That if you keep a box of secrets in your mind, it will only grow to define you. That you can’t untangle yourself from those who stamped their dreams, their ambitions, their personalities and their love on you.
I found the rest of the book, though, rather lifeless. The glacial pace, the infidelity subplot and the hints of secrets delivered with a ball ping hammer took the verve out of the writing. This is a debut and while the elements were here, I found this more stylistic than stirring.
July 1, 2020
I thought this was well written and had a good amount of suspense!! It's about family, love, loss, suicide, and grief!
At the beginning we read about the suicide of Alice's brother Rob. He ran away from home at the young age of 15, and he never came back! Growing up, they were very close and barely fought. She always thought she would see him again, but she doesn't! She decides to move on with her life, and gets married and has children. While pregnant with her 2nd child, she learns of Robs suicide and is devastated!
After a decade, Alice's mother is dealing with dementia and needs to go into an assisted living home. Alice must pack up the family home, and while searching Rob's bedroom, she comes across a box of letters that Rob had written to various people, but not one for her, and an autopsy report. Alice uncovers lies her mother had kept from her and wonders why her mother never told her. She decides to deliver the letters to the people he wrote to. As the story progresses, you learn about the truth behind why Rob ran away, secrets are revealed, I enjoyed reading this and learning about Rob and him as a person. Parts of the book I found were just too slow for me, and I felt like a few things were left unanswered! But all in all, it was decent read and would recommend it!
At the beginning we read about the suicide of Alice's brother Rob. He ran away from home at the young age of 15, and he never came back! Growing up, they were very close and barely fought. She always thought she would see him again, but she doesn't! She decides to move on with her life, and gets married and has children. While pregnant with her 2nd child, she learns of Robs suicide and is devastated!
After a decade, Alice's mother is dealing with dementia and needs to go into an assisted living home. Alice must pack up the family home, and while searching Rob's bedroom, she comes across a box of letters that Rob had written to various people, but not one for her, and an autopsy report. Alice uncovers lies her mother had kept from her and wonders why her mother never told her. She decides to deliver the letters to the people he wrote to. As the story progresses, you learn about the truth behind why Rob ran away, secrets are revealed, I enjoyed reading this and learning about Rob and him as a person. Parts of the book I found were just too slow for me, and I felt like a few things were left unanswered! But all in all, it was decent read and would recommend it!
May 7, 2020
How To Bury Your Brother. A strong title. One that gets a reaction right away, different emotions depending on the nature of ones relationship with their brother. For me, this title inflicted sadness. I have one sibling, a brother.
At the young age of fifteen Robinson (Rob) runs away from home. His sister Alice is left questioning why her brother left, where he went, and if he's coming back. The summer of 2007, 24 years later, still without answers, Alice attends Robs funeral...
Fast forward to the winter of 2016. While clearing out her childhood home Alice discovers a stack of letters, each addressed to a different person ... all written by her brother. From here a new chapter in Alice's life is written.
To say this book was beautiful would be an understatement. This story was complex, thought provoking, layer upon layer of family relationships, self discovery but ultimately learning the truth, coming to terms with how to move forward and say goodbye.
I highly recommend this book but beware, there are heavy trigger warnings ❤️
Huge thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark for my copy!!
At the young age of fifteen Robinson (Rob) runs away from home. His sister Alice is left questioning why her brother left, where he went, and if he's coming back. The summer of 2007, 24 years later, still without answers, Alice attends Robs funeral...
Fast forward to the winter of 2016. While clearing out her childhood home Alice discovers a stack of letters, each addressed to a different person ... all written by her brother. From here a new chapter in Alice's life is written.
To say this book was beautiful would be an understatement. This story was complex, thought provoking, layer upon layer of family relationships, self discovery but ultimately learning the truth, coming to terms with how to move forward and say goodbye.
I highly recommend this book but beware, there are heavy trigger warnings ❤️
Huge thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark for my copy!!
March 3, 2024
How to Bury Your Brother by Lindsey Rogers Cook. Alice adored her older brother. When he ran away at the age 15 Alice was 11 who believed her brother would one day return. The next time Alice saw her brother was many years later (30ish) at his funeral. Alice began to search for answers. This is a story of answers Alice did not expect to find when she started searching for her brother , Rob.
May 16, 2020
How to Bury Your Brother, a novel by Lindsey Rogers Cook. Sourcebooks Landmark. General Fiction (Adult). Women’s Fiction. ISBN: 9781728205373. Pre-publication digital copy. Publication date 12 May 2020. 5 Stars.
Southern and by turns heartwarming and tragic, this story keeps you turning the pages with glimpses of deep sibling love as seen through the often foggy, haunting lens of loss.
With determination, Alice struggles to balance her own family while pursuing leads to learn the truth about her runaway brother, Rob, by sorting through memories and the letters he left behind. Alice can either destroy or reimagine herself—bringing the reader along with her to its soulful resolution. Highly recommend.
Thanks to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Landmark for providing a digital edition of this book for review.
Southern and by turns heartwarming and tragic, this story keeps you turning the pages with glimpses of deep sibling love as seen through the often foggy, haunting lens of loss.
With determination, Alice struggles to balance her own family while pursuing leads to learn the truth about her runaway brother, Rob, by sorting through memories and the letters he left behind. Alice can either destroy or reimagine herself—bringing the reader along with her to its soulful resolution. Highly recommend.
Thanks to NetGalley and Sourcebooks Landmark for providing a digital edition of this book for review.
December 16, 2020
This book begins with a suicide. Rob's suicide.
It's not really bothersome because you don't know him yet and the importance of this scene passes you by without so much as a backwards glance.
Alice and Rob were very close growing up. Unlike other siblings, they never fought or bickered. They never had that "sibling hatred" that so many of us have, quite the opposite actually. They loved each other more than anything, their bond was impenetrable. When Rob was nearing adulthood, he ran away & never returned. His family never saw him again until the day of his funeral. Nearly a decade later, Alice is cleaning out his old bedroom and finds a box addressed to her that contains 7 handwritten letters, each made out to a different person, but there isn't one for her.
We follow Alice as she delivers the letters and tries to uncover the mystery of who her brother was & the dark past of her family.
I felt that the author's writing was diverse and filled with emotion. She made me fall in love with Rob's character, which is why I'm happy that she put his suicide at the very beginning. Alice was okay, but she infuriated me a lot with how she handled certain situations.
My issues with this book were that I felt the pace was a bit too slow, and the ending was not what I had imagined nor what I wanted. The author left us with a bit of unfinished business that I personally would have liked to know how it turned out. My curiosity for the letters and my growing fondness of Rob kept me going.
I'm glad that I read it & I would definitely recommend this to fans of mystery & suspense. I just personally wanted a bit more.
A big thank you to Netgalley for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
It's not really bothersome because you don't know him yet and the importance of this scene passes you by without so much as a backwards glance.
Alice and Rob were very close growing up. Unlike other siblings, they never fought or bickered. They never had that "sibling hatred" that so many of us have, quite the opposite actually. They loved each other more than anything, their bond was impenetrable. When Rob was nearing adulthood, he ran away & never returned. His family never saw him again until the day of his funeral. Nearly a decade later, Alice is cleaning out his old bedroom and finds a box addressed to her that contains 7 handwritten letters, each made out to a different person, but there isn't one for her.
We follow Alice as she delivers the letters and tries to uncover the mystery of who her brother was & the dark past of her family.
I felt that the author's writing was diverse and filled with emotion. She made me fall in love with Rob's character, which is why I'm happy that she put his suicide at the very beginning. Alice was okay, but she infuriated me a lot with how she handled certain situations.
My issues with this book were that I felt the pace was a bit too slow, and the ending was not what I had imagined nor what I wanted. The author left us with a bit of unfinished business that I personally would have liked to know how it turned out. My curiosity for the letters and my growing fondness of Rob kept me going.
I'm glad that I read it & I would definitely recommend this to fans of mystery & suspense. I just personally wanted a bit more.
A big thank you to Netgalley for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
August 28, 2023
*Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for a free e-copy in exchange for an honest review.*
Actual Rating: 2.5
Unfortunately, this book didn't hit me the way I wanted it to, though plotwise there was a lot of potential.
The story starts after Rob's suicide; Alice finds a box of letters written from her brother to various people in his life — a life she didn't know that much about because he ran away when he was fifteen. Finally gathering up the courage to address what happened to her brother in the years they were apart, Alice delivers the letters herself and embarks on a journey to find the answers.
The plot had a lot there, but honestly I was a little confused by the chronology of things. There were things that were happening in the current timeline, but also long passages about previous occurrences with Alice and with Robinson, and it was kind of difficult to follow.
The characters were also quite interesting, but I was more connected to the present timeline with Alice and Walker and their children than with Robinson and what happened to him. Because the story started after his suicide and was so strongly in Alice's perspective, it was honestly hard to care about Robinson and connect with him.
One thing that I really enjoyed was Alice's character development in the present, and how even though she was given a little romance sub-plot, that did not put a halt to the mystery and her personal growth, which she kept trying to find.
The writing style was honestly a little slow for me. The first half felt like nothing was happening, and the last part felt like things were revealed very quickly, but not in a satisfying way where our main character found things out slowly and pieced them together herself, but rather because the information was handed to her in the form of a letter or just by someone telling it to her.
Ultimately, this book was just kind of "stuffy" to me. It was hard to get through because the characters were distant and the plot was slow. In more abstract terms, I appreciate the main character's development and I appreciate the plot arc, but in execution it was hard to get through the novel.
Actual Rating: 2.5
Unfortunately, this book didn't hit me the way I wanted it to, though plotwise there was a lot of potential.
The story starts after Rob's suicide; Alice finds a box of letters written from her brother to various people in his life — a life she didn't know that much about because he ran away when he was fifteen. Finally gathering up the courage to address what happened to her brother in the years they were apart, Alice delivers the letters herself and embarks on a journey to find the answers.
The plot had a lot there, but honestly I was a little confused by the chronology of things. There were things that were happening in the current timeline, but also long passages about previous occurrences with Alice and with Robinson, and it was kind of difficult to follow.
The characters were also quite interesting, but I was more connected to the present timeline with Alice and Walker and their children than with Robinson and what happened to him. Because the story started after his suicide and was so strongly in Alice's perspective, it was honestly hard to care about Robinson and connect with him.
One thing that I really enjoyed was Alice's character development in the present, and how even though she was given a little romance sub-plot, that did not put a halt to the mystery and her personal growth, which she kept trying to find.
The writing style was honestly a little slow for me. The first half felt like nothing was happening, and the last part felt like things were revealed very quickly, but not in a satisfying way where our main character found things out slowly and pieced them together herself, but rather because the information was handed to her in the form of a letter or just by someone telling it to her.
Ultimately, this book was just kind of "stuffy" to me. It was hard to get through because the characters were distant and the plot was slow. In more abstract terms, I appreciate the main character's development and I appreciate the plot arc, but in execution it was hard to get through the novel.
June 5, 2020
This was a birthday gift last month from my good friend David Green :)
****
*Side note: anyone having trouble concnetrating on doing book reviews sometimes?*
What caught my eye was the title.. it amused me for a minute till I read the description and the book jumped out at me Read me, read me! . Didn't win the giveaway but I put it on my wishlist (where I was told by a different friend I was forbidden to buy anything off it till after my birthday or she'd kick my butt haha).
This was a quiet book. It tells the story without fanfare, taking you by the hand as you go along the journey with Alice as she finds out things about her family (some of them she had never thought about).
You hope with Alice for a little bit, the impossible hope because you want that resolution for her but you know she has to reach the place she needs to be and she has to face it head on.
One revelation I guessed at but was hoping I was wrong :(. I wanted to give Rob a big hug and not let him go for awhile. There was some good in his life, and I was glad he had some, but he was a troubled guy.
There's a bittersweet kind of quality to this at times, but it doesn't overtake the story. It's just there, hanging out while everything is revealing itself.
The ending had me smiling a bit, you get the sense that
Would recommend :)
****
*Side note: anyone having trouble concnetrating on doing book reviews sometimes?*
What caught my eye was the title.. it amused me for a minute till I read the description and the book jumped out at me Read me, read me! . Didn't win the giveaway but I put it on my wishlist (where I was told by a different friend I was forbidden to buy anything off it till after my birthday or she'd kick my butt haha).
This was a quiet book. It tells the story without fanfare, taking you by the hand as you go along the journey with Alice as she finds out things about her family (some of them she had never thought about).
You hope with Alice for a little bit, the impossible hope because you want that resolution for her but you know she has to reach the place she needs to be and she has to face it head on.
One revelation I guessed at but was hoping I was wrong :(. I wanted to give Rob a big hug and not let him go for awhile. There was some good in his life, and I was glad he had some, but he was a troubled guy.
There's a bittersweet kind of quality to this at times, but it doesn't overtake the story. It's just there, hanging out while everything is revealing itself.
The ending had me smiling a bit, you get the sense that
Would recommend :)
July 28, 2020
How To Bury Your Brother
by Lindsey Rogers Cook
This is such an emotional book that griefs with family, grief, loss and love. The story opens with news that Alice's estranged brother who left their home when he was 15 yo and she 11 yo has committed suicide. With a family of her own, she has to learn to accept that she will never see him again, Years later as her mother is suffering from dementia and will now require more help and need to move to a facility, she discovers some letters from Rob that were kept hidden. The process of Alice discovering the truth about Rob's story and why he left home is soon revealed.
This is a poignant story that spans generations about the Tate family and the secrets they hold. Cook wrote a beautiful story against the backdrop of the beautiful South and the ugly family traumas and drama people are willing to hide and keep secret.to save face. The story moved me as the story is slowly revealed from the past and how Alice is navigating her present circumstance and her own family.
Great domestic drama I enjoyed reading.
by Lindsey Rogers Cook
This is such an emotional book that griefs with family, grief, loss and love. The story opens with news that Alice's estranged brother who left their home when he was 15 yo and she 11 yo has committed suicide. With a family of her own, she has to learn to accept that she will never see him again, Years later as her mother is suffering from dementia and will now require more help and need to move to a facility, she discovers some letters from Rob that were kept hidden. The process of Alice discovering the truth about Rob's story and why he left home is soon revealed.
This is a poignant story that spans generations about the Tate family and the secrets they hold. Cook wrote a beautiful story against the backdrop of the beautiful South and the ugly family traumas and drama people are willing to hide and keep secret.to save face. The story moved me as the story is slowly revealed from the past and how Alice is navigating her present circumstance and her own family.
Great domestic drama I enjoyed reading.
May 11, 2020
HOW TO BURY YOUR BROTHER is about a young woman coping with the death of her estranged brother and trying to learn the truths about his life without unraveling her own. It’s beautifully written and emotionally evocative. Perfect for fans of literary fiction, family dramas, and mysteries!
June 9, 2020
I picked this up in the grocery store and was pleasantly surprised. This story was well written, had an engaging lead in and held my attention, even with an unlikeable protagonist. Alice is a very selfish and frigid person, but I still wanted to know exactly what happened. I thought the story was extremely realistic and that the characters behaved as real people. This would go over well with fans of VC Andrews. Family secrets and vivid settings.
September 29, 2023
This was not enjoyable. Alice was boringly obsessed with her brother and so stagnant. She didn’t DO anything! I did not buy the premise of this story. What exactly did her parents (particularly her mother) do to make her rarely return home? Why not hire someone to search for her brother once she was an adult? Why was telling her husband on their 1st date that she and her brother “weren’t close” such a deep, dark, marriage damaging secret? Then, throw in a Harlequin style romance section with her college boyfriend that she hasn’t seen in 20 years that includes lines like “did he come here often? Maybe with other girls?”, and (reading a plaque on a statue), “Renascence; Do you know what it means?” “Rebirth”. Lady, you are a college graduate, give me a break! There is also a major revelation that was so predictable as to be almost laughable. Frustrating.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 8, 2020
When 11 year old Alice’s bother Rob runs away from home during their annual vacation, she doesn’t realize that it will be forever. Deep in her heart, she just knows he will return. Rather than follow her love and her dreams, she stays close to their childhood home, always on the lookout for him.
After years of torture, she decides to “put it in a box in her mind” and move on as best she can, telling her new boyfriend and soon to be husband that she a brother “but we aren’t close”. And so Alice begins her life, employing all the training her mother gave her, knowing what to put in a box and what to say and what face to show to the world.
Several years later, while pregnant with her second child, news of Rob’s death shocks Alice.
A decade later, with her mother in an assisted care facility, slowly succumbing to the effects of dementia, Alice must close up her childhood home for good. While going through the house, she realizes just how long her mother had been suffering with dementia. She also finds some boxes of Rob’s that were mailed after he died and in one, letters to be sent to various people.
Alice slowly begins to discover the story of the brother she lost and in the process learns about herself and her own children and what her children know about her.
The idea behind this book was very good. Slowly peeling back the layers of family and secrets, we begin to see just how much of the family foundation is built on lies.
There were a couple of things that I did not enjoy. Jake – everything about Jake was pointless other than to show what she was willing to give up in order to find her brother. Jake and Alice meeting again after so many years and their reunion was not believable and not relevant to the story and also a little too much to be believed in the telling of how their lives intersected.
Not enough was told about Alice’s mother and father and Uncle Jamie but there were just enough glimmers that I figured out one of the pivotal relationships very early on.
The ending felt flat to me.
Alice’s daughter’s insight into Alice was very well done and seemed to open Alice’s eyes quite a bit.
Thank you to NetGalley and to the Publisher for the e-ARC in exchange for my honest review
After years of torture, she decides to “put it in a box in her mind” and move on as best she can, telling her new boyfriend and soon to be husband that she a brother “but we aren’t close”. And so Alice begins her life, employing all the training her mother gave her, knowing what to put in a box and what to say and what face to show to the world.
Several years later, while pregnant with her second child, news of Rob’s death shocks Alice.
A decade later, with her mother in an assisted care facility, slowly succumbing to the effects of dementia, Alice must close up her childhood home for good. While going through the house, she realizes just how long her mother had been suffering with dementia. She also finds some boxes of Rob’s that were mailed after he died and in one, letters to be sent to various people.
Alice slowly begins to discover the story of the brother she lost and in the process learns about herself and her own children and what her children know about her.
The idea behind this book was very good. Slowly peeling back the layers of family and secrets, we begin to see just how much of the family foundation is built on lies.
There were a couple of things that I did not enjoy. Jake – everything about Jake was pointless other than to show what she was willing to give up in order to find her brother. Jake and Alice meeting again after so many years and their reunion was not believable and not relevant to the story and also a little too much to be believed in the telling of how their lives intersected.
Not enough was told about Alice’s mother and father and Uncle Jamie but there were just enough glimmers that I figured out one of the pivotal relationships very early on.
The ending felt flat to me.
Alice’s daughter’s insight into Alice was very well done and seemed to open Alice’s eyes quite a bit.
Thank you to NetGalley and to the Publisher for the e-ARC in exchange for my honest review
July 10, 2020
One of the thoughts that kept reverberating through my mind while reading How To Bury Your Brother was surprise. I was surprised at the deep life insights found within the pages from a seemingly young author. I am not sure just how old Ms. Cook is, but the picture on her website shows a young lady who looks like she has at least a few more years before hitting 30. How she managed to convey such mature and wise-beyond-her-years digressions about life and relationships is a wonder. I found myself relating to much of what the characters were going through and it made my reading experience so immersive.
This is a story about so much: loss and grief, but also love and relationships. And more than anything, how keeping secrets, no matter how good the intentions, can hurt those closest to you. This was a slow burner of a novel but packed full of emotional depth. And it was all moved along smoothly by Alice's quest to deliver her brother's letters. I really don't have anything bad to say about this one, it was beautiful and I think it will stay with me for a long time. I will definitely be looking for more from Lindsey Rogers Cook in the future!
This is a story about so much: loss and grief, but also love and relationships. And more than anything, how keeping secrets, no matter how good the intentions, can hurt those closest to you. This was a slow burner of a novel but packed full of emotional depth. And it was all moved along smoothly by Alice's quest to deliver her brother's letters. I really don't have anything bad to say about this one, it was beautiful and I think it will stay with me for a long time. I will definitely be looking for more from Lindsey Rogers Cook in the future!
June 8, 2021
The concept on this one was interesting, a women loses her brother at a young age with lots of secrets surrounding his life and death, she find a box of old letters when she becomes an adult and decides to learn what really happened to him.
Sadly, to me, the story fell flat. This is a debut book by this author so I will give a little wiggle room. The parts that focused on the letters and her brothers past were interesting and I looked forward to learning the bug secret tou knew was coming.
A lot of the filler, the sisters not so stellar marriage & somewhat mundane life, felt exactly like that, just filler. It didn't really add to the story and caused it to feel very slow in parts.
All in all it wasn't a terrible book, it just didn't quite do it for me.
Sadly, to me, the story fell flat. This is a debut book by this author so I will give a little wiggle room. The parts that focused on the letters and her brothers past were interesting and I looked forward to learning the bug secret tou knew was coming.
A lot of the filler, the sisters not so stellar marriage & somewhat mundane life, felt exactly like that, just filler. It didn't really add to the story and caused it to feel very slow in parts.
All in all it wasn't a terrible book, it just didn't quite do it for me.
March 19, 2020
I tried two different time to read this book and both times I gave up. I could not gather any interest in the characters or the story line. I rarely DNF books and I truly hate to do that but I just didn't find this book interesting and I got to the point I was dreading the attempt of reading it.
May 11, 2020
3.5 stars - RTC!
May 10, 2020
How to Bury Your Brother by Lindsey Rogers Cook is a highly recommended look at a dysfunctional Southern family with secrets.
Alice's best friend, her brother Rob, ran away at age fifteen. She was five years younger than him and has missed him ever since then. Two decades later she is attending his funeral. His death, her mother tells her, was a heart attack due to an overdose on Oxycontin. She never had closure over his disappearance and death, so eight years later when her mother is in a memory care facility and she is cleaning out her mother's house she is shocked to come across Rob's guitar and a stack of seven letters he has written to various people. She also finds an autopsy report showing her family's lies. Alice is hurt that her mother hid all of this and never said a word to her. She is also hurt that she is not among the letter recipients, but she decides to find the people Rob wrote to and give them the letter he wrote to them years earlier.
This is a well-written, perceptive novel of dark secrets that families keep hidden and the secrets that are exposed but not acknowledged. Alice must not only face the secrets uncovered in the letters, she must also admit to the problems in her own life. As Alice delivers the letters, both truths hidden in the past and those not confronted in the future are revealed. She discovers some truths about her brother while she reexamines her relationship with her mother and, ultimately, she learns something about herself. While the pacing of the plot is uneven and interminably slow at times, it does pick up toward the end. Rob's story kept me reading. The final denouement is unexpected, but does tie in with the storyline.
Both Alice and her brother are well-developed characters. For all his problems, Rob becomes an appealing likeable character in the end after the letters are revealed. It is heartbreaking when he finally shares why he ran away. Alice mentions her husband's ongoing affair at the start but, much to my chagrin, just lets it slide without confrontation for much of the novel. Her inability to say something was off-putting. There were some other unanswered questions and encounters that made the end of the novel just a bit too pat for me. I do think this could be a good choice for bookclubs to discuss as there are plenty of issues presented that could evoke many reactions. 3.5 rounded up
Disclosure: My review copy was courtesy of Sourcebooks.
http://www.shetreadssoftly.com/2020/0...
April 19, 2020
Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC and the opportunity to review it.
The premise of this book sounded interesting, and it was done incredibly well.
TRIGGER WARNING: overdose, suicide, infidelity, dementia, substance use, mention of statutory rape (off-page)
It starts with an overdose, and a funeral. We aren't given much information about Rob, the guy who died, but the story focuses on his family, mainly Alice, his sister.
As with so many families, there's an image to uphold, and Alice's family is working hard to maintain theirs. Rather than putting things out in the open, the family has secrets in layers. The first surrounds Rob - he's estranged from the family, and Alice, who was just a young girl when he left, doesn't know anything about the man he became. There's hints of trouble within her marriage, but not much is explained in the immediacy of processing a death.
Nearly a decade later, Alice's mother is in a nursing home, and the task of clearing out her house falls to Alice. She discovers a box that has her name on it, and it has letters from her brother. While there isn't one for her, she feels obligated to deliver these letters in hopes of finding out more about him. She also discovers an autopsy report that reveals that there was more than originally revealed going on with her brother.
On her quest to find out who her brother is, she discovers who she is and makes some weighty decisions about her own life. Flashbacks clue us in to more of her life story, which is shown in bits and pieces throughout the book.
The pacing wasn't consistent throughout the book. The first half of the book was engaging but fairly slow moving, and around the halfway point, it kept picking up speed, and I flew through the remainder of the book. It was well worth the time, though. I'd strongly recommend this book, as long as the trigger warnings are those that you can handle.
The premise of this book sounded interesting, and it was done incredibly well.
TRIGGER WARNING: overdose, suicide, infidelity, dementia, substance use, mention of statutory rape (off-page)
It starts with an overdose, and a funeral. We aren't given much information about Rob, the guy who died, but the story focuses on his family, mainly Alice, his sister.
As with so many families, there's an image to uphold, and Alice's family is working hard to maintain theirs. Rather than putting things out in the open, the family has secrets in layers. The first surrounds Rob - he's estranged from the family, and Alice, who was just a young girl when he left, doesn't know anything about the man he became. There's hints of trouble within her marriage, but not much is explained in the immediacy of processing a death.
Nearly a decade later, Alice's mother is in a nursing home, and the task of clearing out her house falls to Alice. She discovers a box that has her name on it, and it has letters from her brother. While there isn't one for her, she feels obligated to deliver these letters in hopes of finding out more about him. She also discovers an autopsy report that reveals that there was more than originally revealed going on with her brother.
On her quest to find out who her brother is, she discovers who she is and makes some weighty decisions about her own life. Flashbacks clue us in to more of her life story, which is shown in bits and pieces throughout the book.
The pacing wasn't consistent throughout the book. The first half of the book was engaging but fairly slow moving, and around the halfway point, it kept picking up speed, and I flew through the remainder of the book. It was well worth the time, though. I'd strongly recommend this book, as long as the trigger warnings are those that you can handle.
April 28, 2020
Alice is just 11 when her 15-year-old brother Robinson (Rob) disappears, a runaway who she never sees again until his funeral following his suicide years later. Over the years, she has convinced her husband (Walker) and herself that Rob wasn't that important to her, even though, as she gives his eulogy, she realizes this was never true.
In the present day, Alice is still with Walker (who is a stereotypical husband of means and a creep throughout the book,) running an environmental center that her husband paid to open as a project to keep her busy, (which sounds as condescending as it should,) and has two children and a dog. The life she should have aspired for according to her now-suffering-from dementia mother.
Alice is cleaning out her parents' home, when she discovers a box filled with letters that Rob left for seven people that were never delivered, but none for Alice herself. The rest of the book is centered around Alice delivering the letters and trying to learn why Rob left and never came back for her.
This book had it's sad moments, but I really enjoyed reading it. My favorite character was actually Alice's teenage daughter, who was stronger and smarter than so many of the other characters, a trait not shown very often in female teenage characters in this genre. And I liked how Alice recognized her daughter's strength and used it as motivation to start to take charge of her own life instead of being so fixated on outward appearance. I think the book would have been even more successful if the main characters were less stereotypical, less black-and-white in their thinking, and given more depth, but I still really enjoyed reading about Alice's growth as a person (instead of just as a wife and mother.)
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with the ARC of this book in exchange for my honest review. It has not influenced my opinion.
In the present day, Alice is still with Walker (who is a stereotypical husband of means and a creep throughout the book,) running an environmental center that her husband paid to open as a project to keep her busy, (which sounds as condescending as it should,) and has two children and a dog. The life she should have aspired for according to her now-suffering-from dementia mother.
Alice is cleaning out her parents' home, when she discovers a box filled with letters that Rob left for seven people that were never delivered, but none for Alice herself. The rest of the book is centered around Alice delivering the letters and trying to learn why Rob left and never came back for her.
This book had it's sad moments, but I really enjoyed reading it. My favorite character was actually Alice's teenage daughter, who was stronger and smarter than so many of the other characters, a trait not shown very often in female teenage characters in this genre. And I liked how Alice recognized her daughter's strength and used it as motivation to start to take charge of her own life instead of being so fixated on outward appearance. I think the book would have been even more successful if the main characters were less stereotypical, less black-and-white in their thinking, and given more depth, but I still really enjoyed reading about Alice's growth as a person (instead of just as a wife and mother.)
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with the ARC of this book in exchange for my honest review. It has not influenced my opinion.
June 9, 2022
This book starts with the funeral of Alice's brother, however the reader does not realize how important this and what the relationship was like with the siblings and anything about the family dynamic. I felt that the book really didn't demonstrate this in an effective way and it ends up feeling like it is some kind of mania she is under as opposed to a close relationship. Yet, on the other hand, her family has no clue about any of this. She has built her marriage around excluding this information. I found it kind of strange that Alice is aloof with her husband, however she is so strong in trying to figure out what happened to her brother. I think that in the end there was just too much meandering around about other things as opposed to sticking with and building up the story. There were parts of this that really just made no sense and I never really did get a concept of who and what the brother was like. Thanks for the ARC, NetGalley.
May 12, 2020
How To Bury Your Brother by Lindsey Rogers Cook is a deep and thought-provoking novel, there are layers to this book that explore all the complexities of family relationships and how they shape us as adults.
The main character, Alice struggles with the suicide of her estranged brother who left home before she hit her teens, never understanding why he left, Alice feels abandoned by the one person she related to in her family. As the book moves into the present, we see Alice coping with her own life difficulties including her mothers declining health. Which leads her to the task of cleaning out her childhood home which is where she finds a stack of undelivered letters that her brother had written just before he died. There isn’t a letter for Alice but she feels compelled and obligated to deliver the letters and hopes that she’ll learn more about her brother and why he left.
Alice learns as much about herself as she does about her brother on her journey. There are secrets, there is heart-break, there is self-discovery and there is a reminder to always look deeper than the surface layer. How To Bury Your Brother is beautifully written and has a tightly woven plot with characters that brought out the emotions in me; it’s definitely one I’ll be recommending.
Thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark and Lindsey Rogers Cook for gifting me with a copy of How to Bury Your Brother in exchange for my honest review.
The main character, Alice struggles with the suicide of her estranged brother who left home before she hit her teens, never understanding why he left, Alice feels abandoned by the one person she related to in her family. As the book moves into the present, we see Alice coping with her own life difficulties including her mothers declining health. Which leads her to the task of cleaning out her childhood home which is where she finds a stack of undelivered letters that her brother had written just before he died. There isn’t a letter for Alice but she feels compelled and obligated to deliver the letters and hopes that she’ll learn more about her brother and why he left.
Alice learns as much about herself as she does about her brother on her journey. There are secrets, there is heart-break, there is self-discovery and there is a reminder to always look deeper than the surface layer. How To Bury Your Brother is beautifully written and has a tightly woven plot with characters that brought out the emotions in me; it’s definitely one I’ll be recommending.
Thank you to Sourcebooks Landmark and Lindsey Rogers Cook for gifting me with a copy of How to Bury Your Brother in exchange for my honest review.
May 5, 2020
~~I received a free copy of this book to read and review for Wicked Reads ~~
After a very sad start, which the rest of the book seeks to explain and explore, the pace goes slowly for quite a long while. However, once it picks up, there is plenty to commend it. I think possibly I wasn't entirely sold on the letter idea, but by the end it led to the very right place.
What I did find very intriguing was the way that Alice had been so close to her brother, but had in time bought into her parents' complete denial, even when she was convinced that she had seen him. He had almost a ghostly quality which never left her, and yet she never actually actively sought him out. As we later learn ... and I will say no more, the whole of her life to date has been lived in a less than full way - even if externally one would think otherwise.
At heart this is a tragedy, but maybe, just maybe, Alice will come out the other side ready for the life she was always meant to lead.
After a very sad start, which the rest of the book seeks to explain and explore, the pace goes slowly for quite a long while. However, once it picks up, there is plenty to commend it. I think possibly I wasn't entirely sold on the letter idea, but by the end it led to the very right place.
What I did find very intriguing was the way that Alice had been so close to her brother, but had in time bought into her parents' complete denial, even when she was convinced that she had seen him. He had almost a ghostly quality which never left her, and yet she never actually actively sought him out. As we later learn ... and I will say no more, the whole of her life to date has been lived in a less than full way - even if externally one would think otherwise.
At heart this is a tragedy, but maybe, just maybe, Alice will come out the other side ready for the life she was always meant to lead.
June 15, 2020
This book starts out strong. The concept of digging up the past to discover the truth of what happened to the main character’s brother made the first half of this book interesting and intriguing. The second half of the book was less intriguing and less exciting to me.
September 3, 2022
Pretty good, a little predictable. But worth reading if you like family drama
February 11, 2024
Probably 3.5 stars. I liked this and it was a quick read. The characters were all pretty undeveloped to me. TW sexual abuse.
January 10, 2025
this made me feel all the feelings. loved it
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March 5, 2022Wow. Just wow! I love a good debut novel, especially when it’s southern fiction! Family saga…check! So much to unpack with this one. Even though Alice had everything under control, I still wanted to pack my bags and help her find out about Rob. Looking forward to more from Lindsey Rogers Cook.
September 25, 2025
This book was AMAZING. The drama, the familial love, and the heartbreak you endure throughout it is so worth it! I read this book and genuinely had to reflect after because so much happened but it all definitely made sense. I have very little to complain about! Literally the only thing I thought was a tad bit annoying was the person from the main characters past coming back and that being a storyline for around 30 ish pages. It wasn't something I was hoping for personally but I could see how some people might have wanted it! Also it definitely didn't mess up the book in anyway. Everything still worked in the end, I just think this part might have slowed the book down a bit. Everything else about the book I genuinely loved more than I thought was possible! I love hearing about Alice and Rob's relationship as kids and seeing how it truly affected them as people. This book is definitely worth the read! The way everything ties together was really satisfying to read and made me want to reread the book again honestly. You can tell a lot of thought and planning went into this book and it's storyline. Nothing about this book is sloppy, hard to understand or boring.
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