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Do They Hear You When You Cry
For Fauziya Kassindja, an idyllic childhood in Togo, West Africa, sheltered from the tribal practices of polygamy and genital mutilation, ended with her beloved father's sudden death. Forced into an arranged marriage at age seventeen, Fauziya was told to prepare for kakia, the ritual also known as female genital mutilation. It is a ritual no woman can refuse. But Fauziya dared to try.
This is her story--told in her own words--of fleeing Africa just hours before the ritual kakia was to take place, of seeking asylum in America only to be locked up in U.S. prisons, and of meeting Layli Miller Bashir, a law student who became Fauziya's friend and advocate during her horrifying sixteen months behind bars. Layli enlisted help from Karen Musalo, an expert in refugee law and acting director of the American University International Human Rights Clinic. In addition to devoting her own considerable efforts to the case, Musalo assembled a team to fight with her on Fauziya's behalf. Ultimately, in a landmark decision in immigration history, Fauziya Kassindja was granted asylum on June 13, 1996. Do They Hear You When You Cry is her unforgettable chronicle of triumph.
This is her story--told in her own words--of fleeing Africa just hours before the ritual kakia was to take place, of seeking asylum in America only to be locked up in U.S. prisons, and of meeting Layli Miller Bashir, a law student who became Fauziya's friend and advocate during her horrifying sixteen months behind bars. Layli enlisted help from Karen Musalo, an expert in refugee law and acting director of the American University International Human Rights Clinic. In addition to devoting her own considerable efforts to the case, Musalo assembled a team to fight with her on Fauziya's behalf. Ultimately, in a landmark decision in immigration history, Fauziya Kassindja was granted asylum on June 13, 1996. Do They Hear You When You Cry is her unforgettable chronicle of triumph.
529 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1998
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About the author
Fauziya Kassindja
6 books26 followersFauziya Kassindja was born in 1977 in Kpalimé, Togo, Africa. She is the author of Do They Hear You When You Cry? an autobiographical story of her refusal to submit to kakia, the Togo ritual of female genital mutilation, and a forced marriage. Fauziya fled Togo and traveled first to Germany, where she obtained a fake passport, and then to the United States where she immediately informed immigration officials that her documents were false and requested asylum. She was detained by the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services and imprisoned. Fauziya's family hired a law student, Layli Miller Bashir, to advocate for her asylum, who in turn enlisted the help of Karen Musalo, an expert in refugee law and then acting director of the American University International Human Rights Clinic. Fauziya was granted asylum on June 13, 1996 in landmark decision, Matter of Kasinga.
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February 19, 2015
It is insane, the fuss we make about our hesitancies to address these kinds of issues, because heavens forbid we talk about womanly parts and the types of torture these parts sometimes have to endure; it’s akin to speaking about the cringe-worthy subject of sexual assault. Let’s avoid talking about a procedure that poses serious medical risk and causes psychological trauma to women and girls, because it is not polite conversation and it spoils our morning tea, or because it is only a “cultural thing” that doesn’t happen around us; meanwhile, statistics show it has happened/is happening right here in the U.S.
Fauziya, a Togolese, entered the United States illegally because she was a seventeen-year old avoiding marriage to a forty-five year old man who wanted her to undergo the procedure kakia, or female genital mutilation (FGM). Her father, who was against the procedure, had recently passed, and as was their custom, she was now in his older brother’s charge. Her mother, who also did not believe in the process because her sister died from it, was vanished from the home and business she had built with her husband (again, according to tribal custom). When Fauziya tried to explain this to INS officials, they could not understand how someone could not remain within their country and avoid an arranged marriage. She asked for asylum, but was denied because by then, most people didn’t even know what FGM was—it also didn’t help that she had entered the U.S. illegally. This book follows Fauziya’s mental spiral while a U.S. prisoner.
Some wrongly believe this procedure to be a religious mandate. It is not. What it is is a global and human rights issue. They will tell you it is circumcision. It is not. Circumcision leaves someone with the vital parts of his organ. Mutilation is just what the name sounds like:
I read this book and relived the day my eleven-year old friend told me about her experience with “being cut” (this is how you will hear it referred to). We were too young to even know the significance of it back then, still, we held each other and cried that night as we slept on the twin bed assigned to us. She and I were roommates at a church home that sheltered war orphans and children displaced by war. Now, when I really think about it, I realize that it could have easily been me. The only difference between she and I was that she was of the Kpelle tribe and had lived in a village all her life, whereas I was a city girl from a political family: one-half of my family were Americo-Liberians (Liberians with American ties who lived as Americans in Liberia) and the other half were from the Vai tribe. Although my tribal family believed in community, they rejected most tribal customs, in fact, their custom was education, since they worked in order to save up and send their children to America and Europe for education (as a result, that side of the family has doctors, lawyers, professors, historians, and judges).
Had our familial and tribal structures been reversed, I could have been my roommate, mentally and physically disfigured. Back then, I never thought to divulge my friend’s secret to any of the adults around us, for it was something she seemed to guard closely. But now I wonder about how much remains veiled because victims refuse to let the world know.
Fauziya chose to tell the world, and because of this, the INS now recognizes that “gender-specific harms, such as FGM, should qualify a woman asylum seeker for protection.” I didn’t understand then, why my friend constantly walked around other women bare-chested (much to the chagrin of the church women, since she had developed breasts), and yet refused to take communal baths. But as I read about Fauziya’s encounter with her friend in prison, I understood why:
Consider the already-painful process of childbirth; now imagine a woman “being cut and resewn before and after every birth.”
This is not the type of nonfiction that captures you with lyrical grandeur, and even though it is not written in the literary nonfiction method I usually prefer, it is a book that left me transfixed, as I followed the traumatic journey of a narrator who comes of age in prison. There are quite a few legal details for necessary guidance, though at times the information treads the line of verbosity, and yet it's easy to stay involved with this book because it is clearly aligned with its purpose. I also enjoyed reading about the women's groups, lawyers, professors, and historians who rallied this case - oh how the world can unite to denounce human rights violations. The lucid voice of Fauziya never strayed in connecting me with her struggle, reminding me that even when I'm glued to a desk all day, I have the tools to connect with the world and unite for a cause. Most importantly, her voice alerts me of this bondage we call patriarchy:
Fauziya, a Togolese, entered the United States illegally because she was a seventeen-year old avoiding marriage to a forty-five year old man who wanted her to undergo the procedure kakia, or female genital mutilation (FGM). Her father, who was against the procedure, had recently passed, and as was their custom, she was now in his older brother’s charge. Her mother, who also did not believe in the process because her sister died from it, was vanished from the home and business she had built with her husband (again, according to tribal custom). When Fauziya tried to explain this to INS officials, they could not understand how someone could not remain within their country and avoid an arranged marriage. She asked for asylum, but was denied because by then, most people didn’t even know what FGM was—it also didn’t help that she had entered the U.S. illegally. This book follows Fauziya’s mental spiral while a U.S. prisoner.
Some wrongly believe this procedure to be a religious mandate. It is not. What it is is a global and human rights issue. They will tell you it is circumcision. It is not. Circumcision leaves someone with the vital parts of his organ. Mutilation is just what the name sounds like:
cutting off the clitoris and labia minora; cutting off the clitoris, labia minora, and some portion of the labia majora and stitching the lips together, leaving a small opening near the anus for the passage of urine and blood.
I read this book and relived the day my eleven-year old friend told me about her experience with “being cut” (this is how you will hear it referred to). We were too young to even know the significance of it back then, still, we held each other and cried that night as we slept on the twin bed assigned to us. She and I were roommates at a church home that sheltered war orphans and children displaced by war. Now, when I really think about it, I realize that it could have easily been me. The only difference between she and I was that she was of the Kpelle tribe and had lived in a village all her life, whereas I was a city girl from a political family: one-half of my family were Americo-Liberians (Liberians with American ties who lived as Americans in Liberia) and the other half were from the Vai tribe. Although my tribal family believed in community, they rejected most tribal customs, in fact, their custom was education, since they worked in order to save up and send their children to America and Europe for education (as a result, that side of the family has doctors, lawyers, professors, historians, and judges).
Had our familial and tribal structures been reversed, I could have been my roommate, mentally and physically disfigured. Back then, I never thought to divulge my friend’s secret to any of the adults around us, for it was something she seemed to guard closely. But now I wonder about how much remains veiled because victims refuse to let the world know.
Fauziya chose to tell the world, and because of this, the INS now recognizes that “gender-specific harms, such as FGM, should qualify a woman asylum seeker for protection.” I didn’t understand then, why my friend constantly walked around other women bare-chested (much to the chagrin of the church women, since she had developed breasts), and yet refused to take communal baths. But as I read about Fauziya’s encounter with her friend in prison, I understood why:
There was nothing there. Nothing. She had no genitals. Just smooth flesh with a long scar running vertically between her legs where her genitals should have been . And a hole. A gaping hole where the urine and blood would pass through. She kept her legs spread apart, talked to me very calmly and soothingly, very matter-of-factly. “You see?” They cut me and then they sewed me up like this.”
Consider the already-painful process of childbirth; now imagine a woman “being cut and resewn before and after every birth.”
This is not the type of nonfiction that captures you with lyrical grandeur, and even though it is not written in the literary nonfiction method I usually prefer, it is a book that left me transfixed, as I followed the traumatic journey of a narrator who comes of age in prison. There are quite a few legal details for necessary guidance, though at times the information treads the line of verbosity, and yet it's easy to stay involved with this book because it is clearly aligned with its purpose. I also enjoyed reading about the women's groups, lawyers, professors, and historians who rallied this case - oh how the world can unite to denounce human rights violations. The lucid voice of Fauziya never strayed in connecting me with her struggle, reminding me that even when I'm glued to a desk all day, I have the tools to connect with the world and unite for a cause. Most importantly, her voice alerts me of this bondage we call patriarchy:
That was how things worked in our culture. My father had questioned and rejected a number of tribal customs and traditions, but he'd never questioned or rejected that one—the power of the patriarchy.
January 25, 2019
The US is known as the country of immigrants, but it also has one of the most horrific records of integrating them into mainstream society. This is a story of the 1990s but according to all news reports and statistics, things have not much changed in the USA.
To start at the beginning, Fauziya Kassindja started life in Togo in a very patriarchal but loving family (they exist) and was brought up to value education. Her father was against FGM but at the same time, he did not empower his daughters to be independent or to find their own way in life without having to submit to a man. This part of the story was a little annoying in the narrative as the author makes excuses for these things. When her father dies, her ownership passes over to her uncle under tribal law, which, by the way was not the law of the country. When her family decided she needed to be cut and married off to a man already with three existing wives, she decided to flee. However, widespread corruption and lack of education made it impossible for her to seek justice in her own country, and the fact that African families often spread out over different countries stopped her from fleeing to these places. Her sister helped her flee to Germany, where she was taken in by a nice lady, who became her friend and helped her to adjust. After a while, another friend told her to go to USA which appealed to her since she spoke English but not German. She got a fake passport and landed in the US. Her real trial started at this point.
Treated like a criminal, and not a refugee fleeing for her life, she was locked up in high security prisons and treated like filth. For the details, just read the book. It's way too shocking!
The racism inherent even in acceptance of immigrants is pretty evident throughout the book, and especially at the statistics quoted at the end. For example, 97% of the people detained were non-white. Though there were immigrants from places like Poland and Ireland, not even 1% of them were detained and kept under such harsh conditions, whereas immigrants from China, Dominican Republic, Haiti, etc. saw a large percentage of people being criminalised for fleeing persecution.
The book is definitely worth a read since Kassindja's case led to some reforms, and ensured that women fleeing from FGM are considered as legitimate refugee cases. However, the issue of detention of refugees and their mistreatment still continues, not just in the US but all around the world.
To start at the beginning, Fauziya Kassindja started life in Togo in a very patriarchal but loving family (they exist) and was brought up to value education. Her father was against FGM but at the same time, he did not empower his daughters to be independent or to find their own way in life without having to submit to a man. This part of the story was a little annoying in the narrative as the author makes excuses for these things. When her father dies, her ownership passes over to her uncle under tribal law, which, by the way was not the law of the country. When her family decided she needed to be cut and married off to a man already with three existing wives, she decided to flee. However, widespread corruption and lack of education made it impossible for her to seek justice in her own country, and the fact that African families often spread out over different countries stopped her from fleeing to these places. Her sister helped her flee to Germany, where she was taken in by a nice lady, who became her friend and helped her to adjust. After a while, another friend told her to go to USA which appealed to her since she spoke English but not German. She got a fake passport and landed in the US. Her real trial started at this point.
Treated like a criminal, and not a refugee fleeing for her life, she was locked up in high security prisons and treated like filth. For the details, just read the book. It's way too shocking!
The racism inherent even in acceptance of immigrants is pretty evident throughout the book, and especially at the statistics quoted at the end. For example, 97% of the people detained were non-white. Though there were immigrants from places like Poland and Ireland, not even 1% of them were detained and kept under such harsh conditions, whereas immigrants from China, Dominican Republic, Haiti, etc. saw a large percentage of people being criminalised for fleeing persecution.
The book is definitely worth a read since Kassindja's case led to some reforms, and ensured that women fleeing from FGM are considered as legitimate refugee cases. However, the issue of detention of refugees and their mistreatment still continues, not just in the US but all around the world.
November 23, 2008
This is one of those stories which, if it were fiction, it would be totally unbelievable. It's the story of a young Togolese woman who flees Togo to escape an arranged marriage and genital mutilation, only to get trapped in the immigration system upon arriving in the US.
As I was reading this book, I would have given it four stars- the writing could have been more concise and there were some stylistic things that I didn't like. But by the end, I was so heartbroken and angry for Fauziya that to rate it any lower would have been wrong. The writing is simple (if you scan over some of the legalese) and straightforward and utterly poignant.
As I was reading this book, I would have given it four stars- the writing could have been more concise and there were some stylistic things that I didn't like. But by the end, I was so heartbroken and angry for Fauziya that to rate it any lower would have been wrong. The writing is simple (if you scan over some of the legalese) and straightforward and utterly poignant.
October 21, 2023
At first, I was very hesitant to pick up this book because of its length (over 400 pages) and I thought the legal aspects would depress or bore me. However, it was a really engaging read and far from boring. We meet Fauziya Kassindja, the youngest daughter of a successful merchant in 90s Togo. Her childhood was easy and carefree, surrounded by the people she loved and having all the basic necessities in life taken care of by her father's savvy business dealings. Then he suddenly dies. Tribal law put Fauziya at the mercy of her uncle and aunt, who due to tribal differences cannot accept Fauziya's mother. They take over Fauziya's family home, evict her mother, and arrange a marriage for their niece with a middle-aged man, who already has three wives. On top of it all, Fauziya's husband expects her to get circumcised after the wedding ceremony and before the consummation of the marriage. I don't want to spoil much, but to fast forward a bit, Fauziya with the help of her older sister finds a way to flee Togo and ends up at Newark International Airport. She asks for asylum and is tossed into a seemingly never-ending legal and prison drama. The poor girl was detained and moved through several prisons while her case was pending. Not only is there legal drama, but she suffers mentally and physically to such a high degree, she wanted to simply return to Togo and submit to female genital mutilation (FGM) and a husband she didn't love. It was heart-wrenching to read her despair. In the end, everything turned out well, but sadly this is maybe only one of the few happy endings, asylum seekers see in America. Her story showed how coincidence and luck really play a big role in determining the fate of refugees. The system does not effectively work and it's painstakingly difficult to change and have real justice. We live in an unfair world.
"Truth didn't matter in this place. Justice didn't exist in this place. I was in prison, where people in uniforms had absolute power to do whatever they wanted to do with me."
"Truth didn't matter in this place. Justice didn't exist in this place. I was in prison, where people in uniforms had absolute power to do whatever they wanted to do with me."
January 9, 2010
Fauziya Kassindja grew up in Togo, Africa in a privileged setting. Her father did not believe in the tribal practices of polygamy and Female Genital Mutilation (FMG). Fauziya's father died suddenly and she was pulled out of school and put into an arranged marriage as a fourth wife and then told to prepare herself for FMG.
Kassindja's sister went against her own husband to save her sister and help her to escape the country. But escape to what?
Kassindja ended up going the the US and applying for asylum. The customs officers immediately sent her to jail where she was kept for sixteen months. Fauziya was treated worse than the worst offender as she had no status. She was housed with murderers. Her health deteriorated to near death without any concern of any official.
Kassindja was lucky in that her cousin went above and beyond to help her and she met Layli Bashir, a law student and Karen Musalo, a refugee lawyer who helped her and eventually got her asylum.
This book really puts the immigration policy of the United States under intense scrutiny. I believe that Canada's policy is much the same although evidently we were among the first to grant asylum for FMG applicants. Kassindja was a brave and very strong person to withstand all the trials and tribulations and yes, cruelty she encountered on her journey. There has to be a better way to grant asylum to those who truly need it and send away those who don't.
Every single person should read this book as a means to better understand political imprisonment, human rights and how immigration policies do not work.
Kassindja's sister went against her own husband to save her sister and help her to escape the country. But escape to what?
Kassindja ended up going the the US and applying for asylum. The customs officers immediately sent her to jail where she was kept for sixteen months. Fauziya was treated worse than the worst offender as she had no status. She was housed with murderers. Her health deteriorated to near death without any concern of any official.
Kassindja was lucky in that her cousin went above and beyond to help her and she met Layli Bashir, a law student and Karen Musalo, a refugee lawyer who helped her and eventually got her asylum.
This book really puts the immigration policy of the United States under intense scrutiny. I believe that Canada's policy is much the same although evidently we were among the first to grant asylum for FMG applicants. Kassindja was a brave and very strong person to withstand all the trials and tribulations and yes, cruelty she encountered on her journey. There has to be a better way to grant asylum to those who truly need it and send away those who don't.
Every single person should read this book as a means to better understand political imprisonment, human rights and how immigration policies do not work.
June 8, 2016
Fascinating, Educational, Intense, Heartbreaking, Enlightening & Horrifying! A Beautifully Rewarding & Moving Read! I Loved It!
August 23, 2015
Here is Fauziya telling her life's story. It's compelling. I applaud her courage in several avenues. First and especially, in the continued need she consistently exhibits to demand that female mutilation becomes unacceptable and worthy of the condemnation that it so deserves. Especially in Africa and the Middle East, and within worldwide medical associations. It's a cause of misery and terrible outcomes, life-long, for a woman's health and natural barriers against infection. Besides the brutality and trauma of the cutting operation itself, its long term consequences are even more horrific.
But second and more than that, I applaud her ability to judge this escape as she did, from deep within her own cultural dichotomy of conflicting influences. Because she still doesn't acknowledge some of the negatives of her own culture and tribal beliefs, that she does accept as normal.
Saying all that, I thought the telling itself was jagged and endlessly rough. Earlier childhood and the period up until her Father's death was ok but held many redundant phrases and repeating information. After her Mother left, it is so reactive and scattered with emotional upheavals and sometimes rants- that in some aspects, as bad as the facts surrounding her life and choices became? Well, she did the right thing, but at times was also her own worst enemy. Her own perceptions of others' cultures? Fauziya holds her own tribal identity mores and they do seem to give her a strong self-identity.
And they served her eventual choices well.
But second and more than that, I applaud her ability to judge this escape as she did, from deep within her own cultural dichotomy of conflicting influences. Because she still doesn't acknowledge some of the negatives of her own culture and tribal beliefs, that she does accept as normal.
Saying all that, I thought the telling itself was jagged and endlessly rough. Earlier childhood and the period up until her Father's death was ok but held many redundant phrases and repeating information. After her Mother left, it is so reactive and scattered with emotional upheavals and sometimes rants- that in some aspects, as bad as the facts surrounding her life and choices became? Well, she did the right thing, but at times was also her own worst enemy. Her own perceptions of others' cultures? Fauziya holds her own tribal identity mores and they do seem to give her a strong self-identity.
And they served her eventual choices well.
December 8, 2008
I was really blown away by this book - in fact, I think it is one of the best, if not the best - that I have read yet this year. An African girl of 17 years of age tries to get political asylum to escape "kakia" or FGM as she flees Togo by way of Germany and then the U.S. This was a painful but incredible description of her ordeal in prison and finally the legal difficulties endured as her legal team worked day and night trying to get asylum granted. Fascinating and absorbing, a must-read for women and women rights advocates everywhere, but this is a truly a book for everyone. I may make a ring out of this at a later date.
May 17, 2020
This is the retelling of Fauziya Kassindja's courageous, narrow escape from a forced marriage and the ritual of kakia (female genital mutilation, FGM) at the young age of 17. She came to the US seeking asylum and was sent to prison. After reading Bryan Stevensons's Just Mercy I knew that children are sent to prison in the USA, even innocent children, but it's still shocking to hear. Most eye opening for me was the denial of basic, medical care, to the point of safety concerns for health and life. Fauziya was imprisoned for 16 months, beginning in December of 1994, at the age of 17. In the back of my mind while reading this was the constant worry, with the current administration, that circumstances for asylum seekers have probably become worse, and Fauziya's experience was already a nightmare. While Fauziya continued her fight for asylum many other asylum seekers, in the same prisons, were deported back to their home countries. It seems the tactic in these detention centers/prisons is to break the will of asylum seekers until they beg to return home. Thank God Fauziya had a dedicated team of law students and professional advocates working her case and even then it was a difficult battle. How many more equally worthy asylum seekers slip through the cracks? Interesting side note, the testimony of an anthropologist, in Fauziya's case, to witness for her credibility, concerning her country's customs, as her first judge had labeled her "not credible". It's an aspect of anthropology I hadn't considered, testifying in court on behalf of citizens from other countries. The following quotes struck a nerve with me:
...some of the arguments being put forth by people who opposed offering asylum to women on the basis of gender-based persecution. One of the main arguments was that such grants of asylum would open the "floodgates." ...France and Canada had recently recognized FGM as grounds for asylum and neither country had been inundated with women seeking protection from it. No flood. Hardly even a trickle. For America to deny asylum to the rare female who did oppose the practice and did manage to flee it - out of a baseless fear that millions of women would follow behind her - would be a terrible injustice... 252-253
Equality Now has helped me enormously with the adjustment. They believe in follow-through. Some human rights organizations support you until you've been freed from prison or granted asylum or whatever and then they move on to helping the next person. But Equality Now keeps on helping - helping you get settled, oriented, adjusted, helping you build some kind of life. 509
But, for the most part, U.S. refugee policy has become harsher. A new "expedited removal" law, enacted by Congress in September 1996, reduces procedural protections for arriving immigrants. 516-517
...some of the arguments being put forth by people who opposed offering asylum to women on the basis of gender-based persecution. One of the main arguments was that such grants of asylum would open the "floodgates." ...France and Canada had recently recognized FGM as grounds for asylum and neither country had been inundated with women seeking protection from it. No flood. Hardly even a trickle. For America to deny asylum to the rare female who did oppose the practice and did manage to flee it - out of a baseless fear that millions of women would follow behind her - would be a terrible injustice... 252-253
Equality Now has helped me enormously with the adjustment. They believe in follow-through. Some human rights organizations support you until you've been freed from prison or granted asylum or whatever and then they move on to helping the next person. But Equality Now keeps on helping - helping you get settled, oriented, adjusted, helping you build some kind of life. 509
But, for the most part, U.S. refugee policy has become harsher. A new "expedited removal" law, enacted by Congress in September 1996, reduces procedural protections for arriving immigrants. 516-517
December 9, 2020
That's what nineteen days in B.A.U. [(Behaviorial Analysis Unit)] had done to me—I felt "lucky" to be in a prison.It's important to be careful with books like these. On the one hand, this is an invaluable document that demonstrates the constant rock-and-a-hard-place in the contest of human rights between imperial powers and their once possessed postcolonial nations. On the other, the quote by the infamous Gloria Steinem gives me pause, as the name is almost inevitably tied to the most harmful of simplifications in terms of gender, violence, and, ultimately, who deserves humanity and who does not. I saw a bit of that here and there, but the vast majority of this text is blunt about not only all that can and will happen despite all that is trumpeted about rules and regulations, but also about how there are truly good people in this world, from the Autobahn of Berlin to the halls of American University in Massachusetts to the markets of Kpalimé, Togo. The conflict between these two forces is constant, and as said in the epilogue, there's a chance that Kassindja would have had an even worse time of it had she asked for asylum around the time of this book's publication rather than five years prior. Progress, then, is nothing to be taken for granted, and Kassindja's testimony isn't old enough to be discounted as 'that was then, this was now', if ever that sort of discounting was ever viable.
I'm not sure how the public interest was served by my incarceration.
["O]ver 97 percent of the detained immigrants are people of color"—even though 5 of the top 20 countries for illegal immigrants are [white].I don't have to be as wary about this book as I am about other examples of its type (Infidel comes immediately to mind) because of how little it messes around with its context and reality. It's never as simple as Islamophobic, white savior complex would have as believe, and yet the protests about internment camps that have recently been replaced by multiple mass shooting reportage in US headlines (what a country, am I right) demonstrates that Kassindja's experiences have only just begun for thousands of others, millions if one acknowledges that the hard line she draws between detained refugees and incarcerated convicts is not nearly as credible in the US as the text espouses. There's a lot wrong with the US savior narrative/world police force situation maintained by myriad military bases and CIA fueled "interventions (I have to wonder how much of Operation Paperclip leaked into the US' information agency), and I'm not going to say that this book should have gone into it. However, it is important to take an inch without giving a mile, and while I know many aspects of Kassindja's story remain true decades later, her story and those of many others have intrinsic political usefulness, for good and for ill. For example, rape and sexual slavery does not merely target a single category of gender, not in '94 and not now, and it's these sorts of absolutist statements one must make not of and commit to being more informed about if one truly wants to incorporate Kassindja's work into a larger, more holistic awareness of the intersection of legal, social, national, ethnic, and historical in the broad span of oppression, from the days before female genital mutilation was codified in law as a crime to the now of political pundits arguing that they aren't technically concentration camps.
Housing INS [(Immigration & Naturalization Service)] detainees is such good business for York [County Prison] that there were plans to expand the prison so it could hold five hundred detainees...All that money. And the prison didn't treat refugees any better than it treated convicts. If anything, it treated us worse.So. Did I like this book? Yes, very much so. I think it is extremely valuable, especially in today's political environment, as it gives a humanizing base to work off of in terms of nitty gritty sociojudicial reality: what ends up working, what doesn't, and how long it can go on, despite all assumptions and preparations birthed from experience and common sense. I'm even glad for once that I let this work sit on my shelves for as long as it did, as it just wouldn't have hit home as much before the narrative of "illegal immigrant" really started pissing me off. Kassindja's family is still trapped in US prisons and US detention centers and US concentration camps, and twenty-one years has only augmented the tech and expedited the deportation process. There's a grueling trek in front of those committed to humanizing the dehumanized, whether victim of the non-US country of their birth or the prison industrial complex of my homeland, and letting ourselves get used to any of it paves the way to 1930's Germany. To naysayers: I wish I were joking. Kassindja's story is too old to be a wake up call, but it bears repeating that the worst is yet to come if we let it.
Fauziya prevailed because she had the opportunity to appeal Judge Ferlise's decision to the Board of Immigration Appeals, which reversed the immigration judge's decision. Under expedited removal, such an appeal is no longer possible...[W]e simply do not know what effect the elimination of procedural safeguards will have on asylum seekers like Fauziya Kassindja, who continue to arrive seeking protection.
[W]e must recognize that you and I—all of us who are citizens of the U.S.—are responsible for the actions of our government, and in particular for the restrictive measures against immigrants. In recent years we have expressed a fear of "illegal immigrants,"...We fear that we are being overrun by "aliens" and we believe that we are protecting ourselves and our families by keeping them out. Toward these ends, we have encouraged our congressional representatives to enact restrictive measures[.]
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breath free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!
-Emma Lazarus, Statue of Liberty inscription
October 18, 2011
It took me a while to get throught his book. Fauziya is very detailed about her journey, not leaving out details about her traumatic experience, even giving detailed background stories about her legal representation.
One of the most striking things about this book is that Fauziya is about the same age as me, so I kept thinking about what I was doing when she was going through everything. On the Travel Channel, you can watch shows about being "Locked up Abroad" which show the horrible conditions in overseas prisions. You don't think of America as being the place where someone is treated subhuman. She was caught in a horrible limbo, in America, but without any rights - waiting for her day in court.
It also really stood out to me that throughout her ordeal, Fauziya never seemed to lose her faith in God and the Qur'an. Even though she was fleeing a culture that allowed and encouraged female gential mutilation and taking rights away from women, she seperated those practices from her faith.
One of the most striking things about this book is that Fauziya is about the same age as me, so I kept thinking about what I was doing when she was going through everything. On the Travel Channel, you can watch shows about being "Locked up Abroad" which show the horrible conditions in overseas prisions. You don't think of America as being the place where someone is treated subhuman. She was caught in a horrible limbo, in America, but without any rights - waiting for her day in court.
It also really stood out to me that throughout her ordeal, Fauziya never seemed to lose her faith in God and the Qur'an. Even though she was fleeing a culture that allowed and encouraged female gential mutilation and taking rights away from women, she seperated those practices from her faith.
May 20, 2018
Fauziya is a 17 year old Togo young woman is bought up in a fairly liberal but religious family. Her life is going well, they are not poor, she is going to school and her family is a loving one. Things go pear shape when her father dies and her uncle inherits all of his brother’s assets including his family. A more traditional, and certainly spiteful, man the uncle marries her off as the fourth wife but before the marriage is consummated she will have to undergo female circumcision.
Luckily her mother and sister come to her rescue and get her out of the country. After a short stay in Germany she lands in the USA, the land of the free and land of immigrants. And here she sent to a detention centre then a series of prisons while her plea for asylum is reviewed.
The book is mainly about her case and the changes in laws and procedures to recognise that women can be persecuted in unique ways. At times her treatment is appalling, the insensitivity of legal professionals and prison staff is inhumane but a few good people help to free her after 18 months.
Luckily her mother and sister come to her rescue and get her out of the country. After a short stay in Germany she lands in the USA, the land of the free and land of immigrants. And here she sent to a detention centre then a series of prisons while her plea for asylum is reviewed.
The book is mainly about her case and the changes in laws and procedures to recognise that women can be persecuted in unique ways. At times her treatment is appalling, the insensitivity of legal professionals and prison staff is inhumane but a few good people help to free her after 18 months.
July 13, 2014
This book made me really interested in the process of claiming asylum. I've never thought much about asylum, but reading a personal account of someone suffering through the process really made me more interested in learning more about those seeking asylum. i went through a phase of reading a lot of books written by and about people in prison, all of which have been depressing to read, but her story added a whole new dimension. she had to suffer all of horrible things that happen in prison without even having a complete understanding of united states culture. i hope that everything she suffered through really did help other women who are claiming asylum for gender based persecution.
February 7, 2017
While this book is a little outdated (published 1999) not much has changed by the way of treatment of refugees and asylum seekers. I never expected this book to be so topical, but it's all I've been thinking about with the travel ban.
Fauziya never wanted to leave her country. She had no idea what legal rights or options she had when she landed in America. To say that people land here for terrorism and to abuse the system is a ridiculous broad sweep of a tiny minority. She needed help and our systems failed her.
Fauziya never wanted to leave her country. She had no idea what legal rights or options she had when she landed in America. To say that people land here for terrorism and to abuse the system is a ridiculous broad sweep of a tiny minority. She needed help and our systems failed her.
July 16, 2025
4.5 This book will remain with me . A huge profile case true story and a memoir of this horrific time caught up in the justice (injustice) system.
It’s a huge insight to what some women face In other cultures. And then horrific treatment continued in the US , my blood boils how different they are / were cared for over a white prisoner this is subtly mentioned but you feel it hits hard .
It seems the system being private was set simply about money and not about your human rights and her time in prison was purely an income !
Soon after reading I looked online for all the updates of new / legal changes and I’m in awe of this woman along with her legal team for fighting to make a big change .
Layli went on to open a support centre for similar women.
Amazing
It’s a huge insight to what some women face In other cultures. And then horrific treatment continued in the US , my blood boils how different they are / were cared for over a white prisoner this is subtly mentioned but you feel it hits hard .
It seems the system being private was set simply about money and not about your human rights and her time in prison was purely an income !
Soon after reading I looked online for all the updates of new / legal changes and I’m in awe of this woman along with her legal team for fighting to make a big change .
Layli went on to open a support centre for similar women.
Amazing
January 20, 2021
I’ve read about female genital mutilation (FGM) 12 years ago. I am not going to call it circumcision because it is not - Not if you remove the whole clitoris and labia majora. To think that this culture is still prevalent in some countries and it was being justified in the name of tradition and religion, it sickens me to death. Before you point fingers saying it doesn’t happen in Malaysia, it does. There are 4 types of FGM, and in Malaysia - FGM type 1 is widely practiced especially Muslim Girls. Do your research and asked your parents directly — Has it been done on you? Of course some would say you wont even noticed it, you were so small or some would say, we only remove a little bit of it — nothing is harmful. This topic
is so controversial among muslims despite it has no linkage whatsoever with Islam. I believe RAGE did one documentary about female circumcision in Malaysia. I won’t write much on this as this whole issue will turn into a debate in another minutes but these FGM is becoming more severe as in other region especially in some African and Middle eastern countries, they do the type 2 and type 3 of FGM which caused the women to bleed to death and some suffered the impact of it through the childbirth and intercourse. This is exactly the reason Fauziya escaped from Togo and went to Germany.
.
.
She was raised in a fairly educated and modern family. Although both her parents are devout muslims, they believe Fauziya and her sisters knew how to take care of themselves hence they are free to do whatever they want. Besides, her father believe that FGM or known as Kakiya in her language is barbaric hence he never imposed it on their daughters. However, things changed when her father passed away. According to Fauziya, her tribal custom dictates that her uncle and aunt will be her guardian. At that time, all her eldest sisters already married and her mother has been banished from the house. She was helpless and alone. Her aunt has decided to marry her off to another man who’s already has 3 wives at that time. Whats more concerning is he insisted that Fauziya will go through the ‘Kakiya’ as he wanted fauziya to be clean for him once they got married. FGM type 2 and 3 usually will be done by midwife. Most of the cases, this midwife doesn’t sterilise their tools. Hence, most victims prone to have an infection. Whats more worse is Type 2 and 3 FGM is usually done during their teenage years when the would takes longer time to heal. Luckily for Fauziya, her eldest sister helped her to escape from this and insisted her to go to germany as if she just escaped to Ghana or other neighbouring countries , her uncle and aunt can find her and take her home. Fauziya met a kind german woman named Rudina who gave her a temporary shelter and Charlie whose a Nigerian Immigrant that advised her to go to USA and applied for an asylum.
.
.
I wished she didn’t listen to Charlie and choose to stay in Germany but she didnt. She went to USA and was detained right away as she’s using someone else’s passport to enter into the country and she didn’t come clean on why she’s seeking asylum in USA. If she did tell that she will be forced to be circumcised and if she were to send back she might suffer punishment from her family, she probably will be spared from going to the prison. Half of the story did entail on how she met her lawyers in USA, Eric Bowman and eventually Layli Miller Bashir and Karen Musanto. The memoir was a straightforward piece and easy to follow. Fauziya might not write eloquently but the subject matter she raised in this book deserved a spotlight. It didn’t sit well with me
knowing that more than 200 million girls and women alive today have undergone female genital mutilation in the countries where the practice is concentrated. Be it type 1, 2 or 3, no one has to go through it.
is so controversial among muslims despite it has no linkage whatsoever with Islam. I believe RAGE did one documentary about female circumcision in Malaysia. I won’t write much on this as this whole issue will turn into a debate in another minutes but these FGM is becoming more severe as in other region especially in some African and Middle eastern countries, they do the type 2 and type 3 of FGM which caused the women to bleed to death and some suffered the impact of it through the childbirth and intercourse. This is exactly the reason Fauziya escaped from Togo and went to Germany.
.
.
She was raised in a fairly educated and modern family. Although both her parents are devout muslims, they believe Fauziya and her sisters knew how to take care of themselves hence they are free to do whatever they want. Besides, her father believe that FGM or known as Kakiya in her language is barbaric hence he never imposed it on their daughters. However, things changed when her father passed away. According to Fauziya, her tribal custom dictates that her uncle and aunt will be her guardian. At that time, all her eldest sisters already married and her mother has been banished from the house. She was helpless and alone. Her aunt has decided to marry her off to another man who’s already has 3 wives at that time. Whats more concerning is he insisted that Fauziya will go through the ‘Kakiya’ as he wanted fauziya to be clean for him once they got married. FGM type 2 and 3 usually will be done by midwife. Most of the cases, this midwife doesn’t sterilise their tools. Hence, most victims prone to have an infection. Whats more worse is Type 2 and 3 FGM is usually done during their teenage years when the would takes longer time to heal. Luckily for Fauziya, her eldest sister helped her to escape from this and insisted her to go to germany as if she just escaped to Ghana or other neighbouring countries , her uncle and aunt can find her and take her home. Fauziya met a kind german woman named Rudina who gave her a temporary shelter and Charlie whose a Nigerian Immigrant that advised her to go to USA and applied for an asylum.
.
.
I wished she didn’t listen to Charlie and choose to stay in Germany but she didnt. She went to USA and was detained right away as she’s using someone else’s passport to enter into the country and she didn’t come clean on why she’s seeking asylum in USA. If she did tell that she will be forced to be circumcised and if she were to send back she might suffer punishment from her family, she probably will be spared from going to the prison. Half of the story did entail on how she met her lawyers in USA, Eric Bowman and eventually Layli Miller Bashir and Karen Musanto. The memoir was a straightforward piece and easy to follow. Fauziya might not write eloquently but the subject matter she raised in this book deserved a spotlight. It didn’t sit well with me
knowing that more than 200 million girls and women alive today have undergone female genital mutilation in the countries where the practice is concentrated. Be it type 1, 2 or 3, no one has to go through it.
July 25, 2012
This is a first-hand account of what happens inside the women's section of an immigrant detention center (or the sections of a state prison or local jail that receive money from the INS to cage immigrants). The account is clearly written and the descriptions are horrifying. Either Kassindja or the person who helped her write the book also included facts and stats that put some of these horrifying realities into the context of racism (e.g. Kassindja had assumed that, because all of the immigrants around her are people of color, Whites do not have immigration issues. However, she (or her co-author) notes that, in reality, White immigrants facing deportation hearings or asylum proceedings are far more likely to be allowed to stay *outside* of prison while awaiting their hearings) and profit (e.g. the INS, in the mid-1990s, paid app $50 a day per person to the jails/prisons that agreed to cage them).
What bothered me (enough to take 2 stars off the book) is how the book falls into the binary of "good immigrants" and "bad criminals," as if women who have broken the law are somehow deserving of all the inhumanities and atrocities. While the book doesn't explicitly state that, it does give that general feeling, esp when Kassindja describes being housed with non-immigrant "convict" women. I understand that, at the time, she was frightened and probably bought all of the myths about women in prison, but given that someone (Kassindja or her co-author or her editor) took the time to put the farce of immigrant detention policies into context, I wish that that person (or those persons) had also added some facts in about the reality of women who end up in prison (i.e. they don't all smash chairs into each others' heads and they are not all scary monsters). For example, Kassindja was frightened when placed in a cell with a non-immigrant woman who had been convicted and sentenced to prison. The woman was a chain smoker, but when Kassindja, whose asthma got worse when around cigarette smoke, timidly asked her not to smoke in their shared cell, the woman agreed not to. But nowhere in that part of the book--or after--do any of the writers point out that, contrary to popular tv shows, women who end up in prison are not any more unreasonable, scary, violent, etc., than most of the women who never set foot inside a prison. (As someone who has worked with women currently in prison and women who have been released from prison for over a decade, I can attest to this.)
I also found the last chapters, which outlined the media exposure strategy that Kassindja's legal team used, very interesting and helpful, especially the lesson (not explicitly stated) that one can't rely on the government to do the right thing, but that public opinion and media exposure can shame them into doing so. (It did make me wonder though just how much more public opinion & media exposure would be needed today since all of the atrocities that Kassindja endured while in prison still exist today)
What bothered me (enough to take 2 stars off the book) is how the book falls into the binary of "good immigrants" and "bad criminals," as if women who have broken the law are somehow deserving of all the inhumanities and atrocities. While the book doesn't explicitly state that, it does give that general feeling, esp when Kassindja describes being housed with non-immigrant "convict" women. I understand that, at the time, she was frightened and probably bought all of the myths about women in prison, but given that someone (Kassindja or her co-author or her editor) took the time to put the farce of immigrant detention policies into context, I wish that that person (or those persons) had also added some facts in about the reality of women who end up in prison (i.e. they don't all smash chairs into each others' heads and they are not all scary monsters). For example, Kassindja was frightened when placed in a cell with a non-immigrant woman who had been convicted and sentenced to prison. The woman was a chain smoker, but when Kassindja, whose asthma got worse when around cigarette smoke, timidly asked her not to smoke in their shared cell, the woman agreed not to. But nowhere in that part of the book--or after--do any of the writers point out that, contrary to popular tv shows, women who end up in prison are not any more unreasonable, scary, violent, etc., than most of the women who never set foot inside a prison. (As someone who has worked with women currently in prison and women who have been released from prison for over a decade, I can attest to this.)
I also found the last chapters, which outlined the media exposure strategy that Kassindja's legal team used, very interesting and helpful, especially the lesson (not explicitly stated) that one can't rely on the government to do the right thing, but that public opinion and media exposure can shame them into doing so. (It did make me wonder though just how much more public opinion & media exposure would be needed today since all of the atrocities that Kassindja endured while in prison still exist today)
January 21, 2021
Female genital mutilation : partial or complete removal of clitoris.
It's a cultural requirement which is practiced in some countries in Africa, the Middle East and Asia.
Procedures can cause severe bleeding and problems urinating, and later cysts, infections, as well as complications in childbirth and increased risk of newborn deaths. FGM is a violation of the human rights of girls and women.
This is a great book. The real story begins somewhat after page 50 for me. It would not make a difference to leave out those first few pages being that most of the important details are repeated throughout the book..
It's truly moving, I probably almost cried when she was finally released from prison. What a journey and what a true life story. I have read several books on female genital mutilation, not to take away from those books, but this one really goes into detail on how the fight against it is taking place and how tribes to this day see it as normality.
Togolese girl Fauziyah who loses her dad as a young teenager and is then forced to marry into a polygamous family. In order to marry this old (compared to her age) man she was to undergo FGM (Female genital mutilation) to be "clean" for him. Despite her father having not allowed such to be done to his daughters, after his passing, Fauziyahs wicked aunt who instantly became her guardian, chased her mother away and decided what Fauziyahs fate would be. Taking her out of school and forcing her into marrying an older man lead Fauziyah to escape the process of FGM. With help from her sister she boarded a plane headed to Germany in search of asylum.
Little does Fauziyah know her journey in search of asylum is one from hell once she finds herself in a detention center (more like prison) in th U.S.
As the story unfolds we learn about prison systems, how asylum seekers/immigrants are mistreated and abused even in a nation as mighty as America. We learn about what research lawyers have to go through in order to make a difference in cases to do with "tribal affairs/tribal injustice", we further more see the power of journalists and newspaper articles. Having occurred in the mid 90s, I appreciate the authors portrayal of the media and its influence back then.
Based on a true story, some articles can be read online and the judge who ruled against her case the first time around was held accountable, not only for Fauziyahs case, but for many other immigrant cases.
It's a cultural requirement which is practiced in some countries in Africa, the Middle East and Asia.
Procedures can cause severe bleeding and problems urinating, and later cysts, infections, as well as complications in childbirth and increased risk of newborn deaths. FGM is a violation of the human rights of girls and women.
This is a great book. The real story begins somewhat after page 50 for me. It would not make a difference to leave out those first few pages being that most of the important details are repeated throughout the book..
It's truly moving, I probably almost cried when she was finally released from prison. What a journey and what a true life story. I have read several books on female genital mutilation, not to take away from those books, but this one really goes into detail on how the fight against it is taking place and how tribes to this day see it as normality.
Togolese girl Fauziyah who loses her dad as a young teenager and is then forced to marry into a polygamous family. In order to marry this old (compared to her age) man she was to undergo FGM (Female genital mutilation) to be "clean" for him. Despite her father having not allowed such to be done to his daughters, after his passing, Fauziyahs wicked aunt who instantly became her guardian, chased her mother away and decided what Fauziyahs fate would be. Taking her out of school and forcing her into marrying an older man lead Fauziyah to escape the process of FGM. With help from her sister she boarded a plane headed to Germany in search of asylum.
Little does Fauziyah know her journey in search of asylum is one from hell once she finds herself in a detention center (more like prison) in th U.S.
As the story unfolds we learn about prison systems, how asylum seekers/immigrants are mistreated and abused even in a nation as mighty as America. We learn about what research lawyers have to go through in order to make a difference in cases to do with "tribal affairs/tribal injustice", we further more see the power of journalists and newspaper articles. Having occurred in the mid 90s, I appreciate the authors portrayal of the media and its influence back then.
Based on a true story, some articles can be read online and the judge who ruled against her case the first time around was held accountable, not only for Fauziyahs case, but for many other immigrant cases.
March 14, 2022
so sad, yet a story of such resilience and courage. my favorite aspect of this book is how kassindja takes her time telling us about her roots. her life didn't start when she received asylum in america--she was born into a loving family in togo, and her adoration for her parents and siblings, her culture, and her faith are stunningly clear and beautiful to read about. and knowing that, knowing just how much she was forced to leave behind, makes her story even more devastating. people seeking asylum and refuge like kassindja don't come to america because they want to; they come to live in safety, often escaping violence, persecution, and devastating situations. they are survivors before they even arrive. we learn in this book about how kassindja narrowly avoids female genital mutilation and a forced polygamous marriage with a far older man, and then we learn about how she escapes one unjust fate where she has no power or choice just to land in another, in the clutches of the united states immigration system. the saddest part of all might be that this book was written over twenty years ago, but so little has changed since then. our immigration system is still cruel; it tramples and retraumatizes those who are trying to live in safety and with dignity
so. i don't know if this is a hopeful story or not. this book is about a young woman's incredible faith and perseverance, and it is about the resilience of immigrants and survivors of gender-based violence. interwoven with kassindja's story are the stories of the women by her side in detention as well as her legal advocates and supporters. their capacity to care and hold each other up is astounding, and they endure so much, taking risk after risk to get justice for themselves and one another in a rigged, convoluted system. they are why i have hope. but on the other hand, i am so angry and sad after reading this book. the mistreatment kassindja experienced in detention and immigration courts is still happening to others, and there are countless stories like hers that don't have happy endings
worth reading if you want to know more about what kassindja's case paved the way for and the work that remains to be done: https://www.tahirih.org/get-involved/...
so. i don't know if this is a hopeful story or not. this book is about a young woman's incredible faith and perseverance, and it is about the resilience of immigrants and survivors of gender-based violence. interwoven with kassindja's story are the stories of the women by her side in detention as well as her legal advocates and supporters. their capacity to care and hold each other up is astounding, and they endure so much, taking risk after risk to get justice for themselves and one another in a rigged, convoluted system. they are why i have hope. but on the other hand, i am so angry and sad after reading this book. the mistreatment kassindja experienced in detention and immigration courts is still happening to others, and there are countless stories like hers that don't have happy endings
worth reading if you want to know more about what kassindja's case paved the way for and the work that remains to be done: https://www.tahirih.org/get-involved/...
May 15, 2020
My aunt sent me this book. It was published a number of years ago. But I found the experience of immigrants seeking asylum in the US interesting - especially having just read American Dirt. Unlike American Dirt's immigration experience, Fauziya came to the US by plane, landed at Newark and immediately requested asylum. Her experience became well known by the fact that she fled Togo from an arranged marriage and forced Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) at the age of 17. Her asylum case eventually ended up in an immigration court of appeals and helped paved the way for FGM to be considered as a reason to grant asylum in the US (Canada had already accepted it).
What was so sad and hard for me to read in this experience is the treatment of Fauziya in the system. She is mistreated from the minute she lands at Newark, by deliberately being typed, de-humanized and put in jail. At one point she ends up in maximum security and in isolation.
The other hugely disheartening thing about this story is that it took SO MANY PEOPLE SO MUCH EFFORT to get her out of prison, asylum and justice. She is 1 of 10's of thousands. It left me feeling like this is an insurmountable problem. Which can only be worse in our current anti-immigrant environment.
What was so sad and hard for me to read in this experience is the treatment of Fauziya in the system. She is mistreated from the minute she lands at Newark, by deliberately being typed, de-humanized and put in jail. At one point she ends up in maximum security and in isolation.
The other hugely disheartening thing about this story is that it took SO MANY PEOPLE SO MUCH EFFORT to get her out of prison, asylum and justice. She is 1 of 10's of thousands. It left me feeling like this is an insurmountable problem. Which can only be worse in our current anti-immigrant environment.
January 18, 2012
This book should absolutely be required reading in the western world. Absolutely appalling that immigrants are treated as criminals (and worse because under US law they officially have no rights). This is a devestating story, and I'm glad that Kassindja had the strength to tell it. I want to buy several copies of this book and hand them out to people.
One of the most striking statistics in the book was how 50% of illegal immigrants that come to the US are from caucasian countries (such as Poland and Lithuana), but 90% of the illegls held in prison are people of color.
One of the most striking statistics in the book was how 50% of illegal immigrants that come to the US are from caucasian countries (such as Poland and Lithuana), but 90% of the illegls held in prison are people of color.
September 24, 2020
Co-written by Kassindja and her legal advocate Layli Miller Bashir, "Do They Hear You When You Cry" is an incredibly thorough account of Kassindja’s battle to obtain asylum in the United States. Beginning in the tiny country of Togo in West Africa, the book chronicles Kassindja’s early life as the youngest and most beloved daughter of a wealthy, independent-minded, and equally beloved father. Yaya, as he is known to his family, is a respected businessman, patriarch, and pillar of his close-knit Muslim community. Much is made of the fact that Kassindja’s family are a devout and religious people; Kassindja, in fact, won great respect from her community for being baptized, an honor bestowed only upon those who undertake a lengthy, formal study of the Qur’an. Though they embraced most aspects of their religion, as well as honored their tribal Tchamba-Koussountu heritage, Kassindja’s family dispensed with certain traditions. For one thing, Kassindja’s parents were not the result of an arranged marriage; neither, too, would any of their daughters (or sons for that matter) be forced into a union they didn’t desire. Kassindja’s father did not practice polygamy, even though according to local Muslim practice, men were allowed to take as many as four wives. Most important, though, was Yaya’s ardent objection to kakia, a procedure that had caused the death of his older sister. Dissatisfied with the simple explanation, “it’s tradition!”, Yaya refused to let any of his daughters undergo the practice. Thus were all of his daughters, except the youngest, unmarried Fauziya, protected from kakia before Yaya passed away.
Once Yaya had died, however, Kassindja became the legal property of her paternal aunt and uncle according to tribal law. She was pulled out of school and destined to undergo kakia before becoming the fourth wife of a much older man. With the help of her oldest sister, Kassindja was able to flee to Germany, where she stayed for two months. After striking up a friendship with an African man in Germany, Kassindja purchased the man’s sister’s passport and, taking his advice, arrived in the United States and immediately asked for asylum at the border. Completely ignorant as to the U.S. legal process and naïve in her benevolent characterization of Americans, seventeen-year-old Kassindja was shocked to be detained at a detention center for several months, and then placed in a series of minimum- and maximum-security prisons during what turned into a hellish sixteen-month ordeal. The bulk of the book concerns her time in prison, her struggle to find adequate legal representation, and the friendships she makes with her fellow detainees.
Eventually, and fortuitously, Kassindja’s case is picked up by a precocious law student named Layli Miller Bashir. Bashir is able to get renowned refugee law expert Karen Musalo of the American University International Human Rights Clinic to represent Kassindja. Though it takes several more months and considerable media pressure, Kassindja’s case is argued in front of the Board of Immigration Appeals. Finally vindicated and her story legally proven true, Kassindja is granted asylum, paving the way for countless other women to obtain asylum in America based on fears of gender-based persecution. It goes without saying that Kassindja and Bashir forge a life-long friendship in the process, and Bashir goes on to establish the highly respected – and highly successful – Tahirih Justice Center which focuses on providing pro bono legal representation to women fleeing gender-based violence across the globe.
Although "Do They Hear You When You Cry" is ostensibly about female genital mutilation, I would argue that its greatest accomplishment is in exposing the indifferent and overly legalistic asylum process that ensnares would-be immigrants to the United States. Although Kassindja lingered behind bars for sixteenth months, superficial research reveals that many refugees wait several times that long before their cases are finally settled. When Kassindja’s cousin, Rahuf, quickly arranges for her legal representation, Kassindja is ecstatic and convinced she will be granted asylum in no time. Slowly, she comes to realize that all of her fellow detainees also have legal representation; that all of them are granted hearing dates, often months into the future; and that only some of them – a seemingly random and exceedingly lucky subset – will ultimately be granted asylum.
(Excerpt from a book review I wrote for an MPH class)
Once Yaya had died, however, Kassindja became the legal property of her paternal aunt and uncle according to tribal law. She was pulled out of school and destined to undergo kakia before becoming the fourth wife of a much older man. With the help of her oldest sister, Kassindja was able to flee to Germany, where she stayed for two months. After striking up a friendship with an African man in Germany, Kassindja purchased the man’s sister’s passport and, taking his advice, arrived in the United States and immediately asked for asylum at the border. Completely ignorant as to the U.S. legal process and naïve in her benevolent characterization of Americans, seventeen-year-old Kassindja was shocked to be detained at a detention center for several months, and then placed in a series of minimum- and maximum-security prisons during what turned into a hellish sixteen-month ordeal. The bulk of the book concerns her time in prison, her struggle to find adequate legal representation, and the friendships she makes with her fellow detainees.
Eventually, and fortuitously, Kassindja’s case is picked up by a precocious law student named Layli Miller Bashir. Bashir is able to get renowned refugee law expert Karen Musalo of the American University International Human Rights Clinic to represent Kassindja. Though it takes several more months and considerable media pressure, Kassindja’s case is argued in front of the Board of Immigration Appeals. Finally vindicated and her story legally proven true, Kassindja is granted asylum, paving the way for countless other women to obtain asylum in America based on fears of gender-based persecution. It goes without saying that Kassindja and Bashir forge a life-long friendship in the process, and Bashir goes on to establish the highly respected – and highly successful – Tahirih Justice Center which focuses on providing pro bono legal representation to women fleeing gender-based violence across the globe.
Although "Do They Hear You When You Cry" is ostensibly about female genital mutilation, I would argue that its greatest accomplishment is in exposing the indifferent and overly legalistic asylum process that ensnares would-be immigrants to the United States. Although Kassindja lingered behind bars for sixteenth months, superficial research reveals that many refugees wait several times that long before their cases are finally settled. When Kassindja’s cousin, Rahuf, quickly arranges for her legal representation, Kassindja is ecstatic and convinced she will be granted asylum in no time. Slowly, she comes to realize that all of her fellow detainees also have legal representation; that all of them are granted hearing dates, often months into the future; and that only some of them – a seemingly random and exceedingly lucky subset – will ultimately be granted asylum.
(Excerpt from a book review I wrote for an MPH class)
May 9, 2020
What a breathtakingly, painful, bittersweet story. The ordeal that Fauziya faced is indescribable and unbelievable until you read it yourself, and even then it is hard to imagine how a system could treat someone in that way. Her bravery as a teenager to run away from home, alone, into the unknown, to escape the terror of FGM and polygamous marriage is incredible. Then her imprisonment in America, the true injustice she faced whilst fighting for her freedom. But she also had to fight for her sanity, fight for her happiness, and on reflection (unbeknownst to her at the time) fight for other women to receive aid in the face of FGM. Especially today we hear so much about refugees and these 'aliens' trying to enter our country, recent news like Brexit shows how nationalism has risen and our borders are getting tighter and tighter. But what this book makes abundantly clear, is that refugee are not and should not be referred to in numbers or as statistics. They are people, and this book makes it perfectly clear that they are not treated as such until they can prove it - what happened to innocent until proven guilty. Fauziya went through the most traumatic experience and her book illustrates her pain. She had me smiling, laughing, crying; i went along the journey through her words and cannot fathom to imagine what the experience must have been like. I can't even come close to imagining what solitary confinement must have been like for almost a month, what the frustrations of the system must have felt like, to lose your individuality and your voice, I simply cannot imagine.
Although Fauziya's story is ultimately a happy one, the epilogue is crucial in reminding that not all stories like this, not even close, end happily.
Although Fauziya's story is ultimately a happy one, the epilogue is crucial in reminding that not all stories like this, not even close, end happily.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 12, 2018
Een aangrijpend verhaal over een jonge vrouw die moet vluchten voor een vreselijke stamtraditie en vervolgens in een wereld komt die bijna even erg is.
Wat me vooral raakte was hoe Fauziya of de andere vluchtelingen niet serieus genomen werden in Amerika. Steeds veranderde de regels of werd het ze bewust moeilijk of vernederend gemaakt. Het ergste vond ik nog de uitspraak van een rechter over de vrijheidstelling, waarbij de aanklacht was dat haar rechten in de gevangenis geschonden werd. Het antwoord van de rechter: Ze is officieel nooit in Amerika geweest (tegengehouden op het vliegveld), dus we kunnen geen rechten schenden. Oftewel, je bestaat eigenlijk niet voor ons, dus we kunnen doen met je wat we willen. Het is bijna te bizar om te geloven.
Het vluchtelingendebat speelt over de hele wereld en altijd is de oplossing om de deur dan maar dicht te doen of mensen zo wanhopig te maken dat ze uit eigen wil maar terug gaan naar hun hel. Als we nou al die energie zouden steken in het verbeteren van de leefomstandigheden op de plaatsen waar de vluchtelingen vandaan komen, dan zou er volgens mij veel minder problemen zijn. Mensen verlaten niet makkelijk heel hun huis en haard, het moet dan zo wanhopig of gevaarlijk zijn dat ze eigenlijk geen keus meer hebben.
Wat me vooral raakte was hoe Fauziya of de andere vluchtelingen niet serieus genomen werden in Amerika. Steeds veranderde de regels of werd het ze bewust moeilijk of vernederend gemaakt. Het ergste vond ik nog de uitspraak van een rechter over de vrijheidstelling, waarbij de aanklacht was dat haar rechten in de gevangenis geschonden werd. Het antwoord van de rechter: Ze is officieel nooit in Amerika geweest (tegengehouden op het vliegveld), dus we kunnen geen rechten schenden. Oftewel, je bestaat eigenlijk niet voor ons, dus we kunnen doen met je wat we willen. Het is bijna te bizar om te geloven.
Het vluchtelingendebat speelt over de hele wereld en altijd is de oplossing om de deur dan maar dicht te doen of mensen zo wanhopig te maken dat ze uit eigen wil maar terug gaan naar hun hel. Als we nou al die energie zouden steken in het verbeteren van de leefomstandigheden op de plaatsen waar de vluchtelingen vandaan komen, dan zou er volgens mij veel minder problemen zijn. Mensen verlaten niet makkelijk heel hun huis en haard, het moet dan zo wanhopig of gevaarlijk zijn dat ze eigenlijk geen keus meer hebben.
January 24, 2012
A harrowing story of one young girl’s journey into womanhood, which reflects the tragedy in the lives of many girls throughout Africa. Covering the unusual freedoms of a family background which allowed her four older sisters to marry men of their own choosing, Fauziya explains how everything went wrong for her when her beloved father died while she was away at boarding school in Ghana as a 16 year old student. Although this is one woman’s story, right from the beginning the backdrop of others’ lives gives a full sense of the effort it takes to live one’s own freedom. Especially for a woman.
By contrasting the choices her own parents made against the traditions of many in the tribal society in which they grew up , we are introduced to prevailing attitudes and traditions with a little distance. Then gradually as the tale unfolds we gain deeper insights into the variety of ways in which such traditions oppress the people who come to believe in perpetuating them.
The strangest part of this story is how long it takes the Fauziya herself to understand just what it was her mother and sister were working so hard to save her from. In a sense all she knows in her own mind, is that she doesn’t want to marry a man as old as her father. Especially one who already has three other wives. The veil of silence around practices of female circumcision is such that she cannot comprehend what she knows others fear on her behalf. She only knows that some have died. And she knows the cultural reticence to speak of private things.
For the changes Fauziya’s parents have made in their lives, they still retain many traditions in family relationships and respect the laws of inheritance. Her father’s death means her uncle and aunt, with their more oppressive traditions, become her legal guardian, and the owners of her family home. They evict her mother while Fauziya and her younger brother are away at school, refuse to let her return to her studies, and arrange her marriage. The tension between respect and freedom for this teenager are also mixed with the different expectations she grew up with in her own family, which make it hard for her to recognise there is no choice in the picture of her life being ‘offered’ to her. there is only the recognition that, if she chooses it freely it will be easier for all concerned. She does not agree.
As I read these passages I wondered how many Western women would be able to associate their own experiences with this tension between obedience and the subtleties of family persuasion. Personally I have felt similar expectations of loyalty to my own mother’s attitudes about certain choices I have made in my life. They have not been as all encompassing in the society around me as they were for these West African societies. But in their own way they have bee4n as subtle and unquestionable.
It is the very silence around these subjects which makes it so difficult to act beyond the behaviours of others. It is as if you cannot possibly do what you are limited to think about. What you cannot put into words, cannot be put into action.
Strangely I feel there is a connection here between such traditions and the behavioural choices of my teenage daughter’s generation with their propensity for tattoos and body piercings. And yet I find it difficult to speak to her of these things.
But my daughter has choice about these things. Many African women do not. In fact, the women themselves seem to be the ones who perpetuate these traditions onto their own daughters. And it is not just some form of body decoration. It goes to the very core of what it means to be a woman.
When Fauziya is lead away from her own marriage by her oldest sister – the only one who can do this because of her seniority in the family – she is given money from her mother’s inheritance and instructions which get her to Germany. During her two months there she is lucky enough to find a kind woman who puts her up, and another African who suggests she seek asylum in America. But rather than finding freedom in America, she goes through a gruelling confrontation with the legal system which denies her arrival in the land of the free. Mostly this book outlines the processes and procedures involved in this long ordeal. And especially the point at which it shifts from being the story of one young woman to being the test case for many others like her who are also fleeing their own countries for their own health, safety and their very lives.
At times as I read these thick volume I was reminded of the story of Lindy Chamberlain, who was charged with the murder of her own baby daughter who she claimed was taken from the family tent by a dingo while they were camping at Ayers Rock in Central Australia. There are two main reasons for this. The deep religious conviction of a little understood faith, and the prejudices against women in defining their own relationships within the world. And of course the gradual understanding which comes through the emersion in legal processes and learning how to make one’s case within that framework.
There are many layers of experience, and of issues, within the story Fauziya shares with us here. and though one might have hoped that decisions made in her case and the media attention it brought back in 1996 would have gone a long way toward ending the mutilation of young children in the name of tradition, the reality is that even in 2012 FMG is being practiced in western countries where immigrants have imported their traditions, and not necessarily managed to gain asylum away from their more oppressive homelands. while progress has been made, it is not all over yet. Reading this landmark case gives great insight into how and why these practices persist. And we do need to find ways to talk about ‘the unpleasant things’. sharing this book with your reading group would be a good start.
By contrasting the choices her own parents made against the traditions of many in the tribal society in which they grew up , we are introduced to prevailing attitudes and traditions with a little distance. Then gradually as the tale unfolds we gain deeper insights into the variety of ways in which such traditions oppress the people who come to believe in perpetuating them.
The strangest part of this story is how long it takes the Fauziya herself to understand just what it was her mother and sister were working so hard to save her from. In a sense all she knows in her own mind, is that she doesn’t want to marry a man as old as her father. Especially one who already has three other wives. The veil of silence around practices of female circumcision is such that she cannot comprehend what she knows others fear on her behalf. She only knows that some have died. And she knows the cultural reticence to speak of private things.
For the changes Fauziya’s parents have made in their lives, they still retain many traditions in family relationships and respect the laws of inheritance. Her father’s death means her uncle and aunt, with their more oppressive traditions, become her legal guardian, and the owners of her family home. They evict her mother while Fauziya and her younger brother are away at school, refuse to let her return to her studies, and arrange her marriage. The tension between respect and freedom for this teenager are also mixed with the different expectations she grew up with in her own family, which make it hard for her to recognise there is no choice in the picture of her life being ‘offered’ to her. there is only the recognition that, if she chooses it freely it will be easier for all concerned. She does not agree.
As I read these passages I wondered how many Western women would be able to associate their own experiences with this tension between obedience and the subtleties of family persuasion. Personally I have felt similar expectations of loyalty to my own mother’s attitudes about certain choices I have made in my life. They have not been as all encompassing in the society around me as they were for these West African societies. But in their own way they have bee4n as subtle and unquestionable.
It is the very silence around these subjects which makes it so difficult to act beyond the behaviours of others. It is as if you cannot possibly do what you are limited to think about. What you cannot put into words, cannot be put into action.
Strangely I feel there is a connection here between such traditions and the behavioural choices of my teenage daughter’s generation with their propensity for tattoos and body piercings. And yet I find it difficult to speak to her of these things.
But my daughter has choice about these things. Many African women do not. In fact, the women themselves seem to be the ones who perpetuate these traditions onto their own daughters. And it is not just some form of body decoration. It goes to the very core of what it means to be a woman.
When Fauziya is lead away from her own marriage by her oldest sister – the only one who can do this because of her seniority in the family – she is given money from her mother’s inheritance and instructions which get her to Germany. During her two months there she is lucky enough to find a kind woman who puts her up, and another African who suggests she seek asylum in America. But rather than finding freedom in America, she goes through a gruelling confrontation with the legal system which denies her arrival in the land of the free. Mostly this book outlines the processes and procedures involved in this long ordeal. And especially the point at which it shifts from being the story of one young woman to being the test case for many others like her who are also fleeing their own countries for their own health, safety and their very lives.
At times as I read these thick volume I was reminded of the story of Lindy Chamberlain, who was charged with the murder of her own baby daughter who she claimed was taken from the family tent by a dingo while they were camping at Ayers Rock in Central Australia. There are two main reasons for this. The deep religious conviction of a little understood faith, and the prejudices against women in defining their own relationships within the world. And of course the gradual understanding which comes through the emersion in legal processes and learning how to make one’s case within that framework.
There are many layers of experience, and of issues, within the story Fauziya shares with us here. and though one might have hoped that decisions made in her case and the media attention it brought back in 1996 would have gone a long way toward ending the mutilation of young children in the name of tradition, the reality is that even in 2012 FMG is being practiced in western countries where immigrants have imported their traditions, and not necessarily managed to gain asylum away from their more oppressive homelands. while progress has been made, it is not all over yet. Reading this landmark case gives great insight into how and why these practices persist. And we do need to find ways to talk about ‘the unpleasant things’. sharing this book with your reading group would be a good start.
December 21, 2019
A touching, emotional and sad story. I like how she describes her childhood back in Togo, but I don’t think last 100pages are interesting. The story starts getting boring and predictable. The last chapter is beautiful.
Overall, I like it.
Overall, I like it.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 24, 2024
I highly recommend this book! It tells the story that many women and girls face in Africa. Forced marriage, female genital mutilation and having to flee their country to reach an unknown territory seeking refuge. Matter of Kasinga is the first precedent that establishes that women fleeing for gender-based persecution such as FGM may be eligible for asylum in the U.S.
December 30, 2018
The most depressing, memorable and touching read I've encountered in a long time.
Finished its 500 pages in 3 days, with constant bursting out, sometimes urge to put it down and go get a drink. This book, with its horrible background on female genital mutilation, journeys, riot and mistreatment in multiple detention centers, and its contrast with the idyllic childhood and stranger's kindness, is one that you can't put down.
The good:
-Kindness vs Evil: what a story it is! The evil of our world, the horrific things family member and society can do to women, a mother that lost all saying and right after the husband passed away and had to be in exile from her own house, sisters who can't lend a helping hand when their sister are forced into marriage and threatened to be cut, a tribal network where no matter where you run to west africa, they will find me, a legal system that mistreat its immigrants seeking asylum in ways worse than in animal farms, judges who are supposed to tell right from wrong but lack the slightest respect for it, prison guards who would go out of their way to make sure people's respect, confidence and dignity are purely distorted, tortured and destroyed...It's almost to hard to continue and believe that such unfathomable evil still exist in our world. Yet there's the extremely good. The courageous sister and mother who used their life's savings to hold on to the right things they believe in, the random stranger in an airport that invite a stranger, whose language she barely speak, to stay with her as long as she want, the stranger you met on a bus that offers to walk, talk, help, advise you, every step of the way.(despite the overwhelming kindness flowing all over this book, the portion in Germany impressed me the most. cuz while it's obligation for families, natural tendency for pro bono lawyers, it it out of such pure human kindness that the two strangers in Germany helped. The doubting reaction of the US judge later, further proved that.), the previous friendship of the refugees from all over the world (that moment when the friend dragged her into shower, forced her to stare at the remaining scar of a circumcised body, and explaining how they cut it open every time she gives birth, made me burst out in tears.), the cousin, the never-giving-up legal team....The story tears down the cloth and revealed every single evil conducted by human, but later reward you with the shining beauty that is also homo sapiens.
-The awareness: The level of detail Fauziya put in describing the background, culture, history, legal system...are incredibly detailed, informational, and helpful for a foreigner to place his/herself in the scenario, to understand, and most importantly, to take action.
The Not-so-good:
Unnecessary/extreme writing: This is a reallyyyy long book filled with emotions, which is what memoirs should be. However, several portions are def not necessary for the story.
1. Too much emotional description/determining tone about others. pages of pages of pages of doubt, hesitation, dialogue to self. I get it the author wants to express the emotion, but the whole book filled with way to many exclamation marks made readers wear out very easily. It's already an emotional draining journey for us, so maybe easy on the exclamation marks or at least only use them for the strongest ones? The determining judgement about various characters made it very alarming for critical thinking weirdos like me to wonder, what will the other say about this experience?
2. Too much writing about the legal team's preparation...is it really necessary? The goal of this book, and the target audience determined that this shouldn't be a logic text. Some touch on this is def necessary, but I can't help feeling because of the co-author and how indebted Fauziya felt to the legal team, this was included. This broke down the structure of the description.
3. Personally, (for agnostic audience like me), the faith talking can be a little long.
Still all the not-so-good part are overshadowed by this incredible journey she took, and reflected a young 2o year old's tone after going thru so much. A very educational and touching read for all of us who don't stop often enough to appreciate and make a difference in our relatively easy life.
Finished its 500 pages in 3 days, with constant bursting out, sometimes urge to put it down and go get a drink. This book, with its horrible background on female genital mutilation, journeys, riot and mistreatment in multiple detention centers, and its contrast with the idyllic childhood and stranger's kindness, is one that you can't put down.
The good:
-Kindness vs Evil: what a story it is! The evil of our world, the horrific things family member and society can do to women, a mother that lost all saying and right after the husband passed away and had to be in exile from her own house, sisters who can't lend a helping hand when their sister are forced into marriage and threatened to be cut, a tribal network where no matter where you run to west africa, they will find me, a legal system that mistreat its immigrants seeking asylum in ways worse than in animal farms, judges who are supposed to tell right from wrong but lack the slightest respect for it, prison guards who would go out of their way to make sure people's respect, confidence and dignity are purely distorted, tortured and destroyed...It's almost to hard to continue and believe that such unfathomable evil still exist in our world. Yet there's the extremely good. The courageous sister and mother who used their life's savings to hold on to the right things they believe in, the random stranger in an airport that invite a stranger, whose language she barely speak, to stay with her as long as she want, the stranger you met on a bus that offers to walk, talk, help, advise you, every step of the way.(despite the overwhelming kindness flowing all over this book, the portion in Germany impressed me the most. cuz while it's obligation for families, natural tendency for pro bono lawyers, it it out of such pure human kindness that the two strangers in Germany helped. The doubting reaction of the US judge later, further proved that.), the previous friendship of the refugees from all over the world (that moment when the friend dragged her into shower, forced her to stare at the remaining scar of a circumcised body, and explaining how they cut it open every time she gives birth, made me burst out in tears.), the cousin, the never-giving-up legal team....The story tears down the cloth and revealed every single evil conducted by human, but later reward you with the shining beauty that is also homo sapiens.
-The awareness: The level of detail Fauziya put in describing the background, culture, history, legal system...are incredibly detailed, informational, and helpful for a foreigner to place his/herself in the scenario, to understand, and most importantly, to take action.
The Not-so-good:
Unnecessary/extreme writing: This is a reallyyyy long book filled with emotions, which is what memoirs should be. However, several portions are def not necessary for the story.
1. Too much emotional description/determining tone about others. pages of pages of pages of doubt, hesitation, dialogue to self. I get it the author wants to express the emotion, but the whole book filled with way to many exclamation marks made readers wear out very easily. It's already an emotional draining journey for us, so maybe easy on the exclamation marks or at least only use them for the strongest ones? The determining judgement about various characters made it very alarming for critical thinking weirdos like me to wonder, what will the other say about this experience?
2. Too much writing about the legal team's preparation...is it really necessary? The goal of this book, and the target audience determined that this shouldn't be a logic text. Some touch on this is def necessary, but I can't help feeling because of the co-author and how indebted Fauziya felt to the legal team, this was included. This broke down the structure of the description.
3. Personally, (for agnostic audience like me), the faith talking can be a little long.
Still all the not-so-good part are overshadowed by this incredible journey she took, and reflected a young 2o year old's tone after going thru so much. A very educational and touching read for all of us who don't stop often enough to appreciate and make a difference in our relatively easy life.
February 26, 2012
This book is the story of Fauziya Kassindja, a woman from Togo who fled to the United States to seek asylum.
The first part of the book describes Fauziya's life in Togo as part of a large loving devoutly Muslim family. She is especially attached to her Dad. Her parents are both forward thinkers and did not choose to have any of their five daughters face kakia or female genital mutilation. They also permitted their daughters to choose their own husbands and marry for love. In Togo marriages are often arranged by the family and a man may marry up to four women. This was socially acceptable in their family tribes but since Kassinja's father was a wealthy man he chose a different lifestyle for his daughters. Education was very important to her Dad and Fauziya was the youngest of the sisters. She was attending boarding school in Ghana when her Dad died. According to tribal tradition her uncle took charge of Fauziya's life and her father's home and fortune. Since her uncle and aunt had never liked Fauziya's mother they told her she was no longer welcome in her home and sent her away. Upon Fauziya's return from school for the summer she was informed by her relatives that she was not going to be allowed to return to school as it was a waste of money. She was also informed that a marriage had been arranged for her with a man who was twenty years her senior and she was to become his fourth wife. And oh by the way he wanted her to be cut(undergo kakia) before consuming the marriage. Fauziya was incredibly distressed and with the aid of her oldest sister and with money sent by her mother she left Togo and flew to Germany where her uncle could not find her.
Fauziya knew no one in Germany but met a stranger at the airport who took her home and befriended her. In the time she spent in Germany Fauziya also met a man from Africa who told her she should seek asylum in the United States. He provided her with a passport which enabled her to leave Germany and fly to the U.S.
So here in the land of the free is where Fauziya's nightmare began. And this is the heart of the book for me. Of course I feel that forced female genital mutilation is a horrendous act and that forced marriage to a horny old man with three other wives is unconscionable but what occurred to Fauziya in the United States is beyond the scope of imagination. She was placed in four different prisons and did you know that illegal immigrants have no rights? no privacy? horrendous food, a joke of a medical system and face constant guard brutality? Hey guys there is something wrong with this picture! She was placed in prison with murderers, had to face the fallout from a prison riot and was never shown the respect that every human being deserves. Fortunately she had a group of lawyers who were working to set her free and to set a precedent for other women seeking asylum. Her appeal for asylum was denied by a judge who had not read any of the briefs about her case. She was denied bail by another judge pending the appeal of her case. She became physically very ill and also very depressed. She had loving friends in the prisons who were fellow immigrants awaiting deportation. She had caring lawyers and a cousin who all cared about her but the INS system put unbelievable roadblocks in the way. Her lawyers were able to get the press involved and her story became well known. So maybe she was released because of the press and publicity about her case and contacts to influential folks who recognized the criminality of how she had been treated.
Realizing this book was written in 1998 makes one wonder if there might have been a different ending for this strong Muslim woman today post 9-11. Fortunately for all of us who care about women's rights and humanity to others Fauziya's story had a happy ending. She was released on parole and granted asylum. But what scars she probably still today carries from her inhumane treatment here in the United States! I believe that she was able to survive because of her strong belief in the Muslim faith and in God and because of the love which was there for her from her friends in the prison.
The first part of the book describes Fauziya's life in Togo as part of a large loving devoutly Muslim family. She is especially attached to her Dad. Her parents are both forward thinkers and did not choose to have any of their five daughters face kakia or female genital mutilation. They also permitted their daughters to choose their own husbands and marry for love. In Togo marriages are often arranged by the family and a man may marry up to four women. This was socially acceptable in their family tribes but since Kassinja's father was a wealthy man he chose a different lifestyle for his daughters. Education was very important to her Dad and Fauziya was the youngest of the sisters. She was attending boarding school in Ghana when her Dad died. According to tribal tradition her uncle took charge of Fauziya's life and her father's home and fortune. Since her uncle and aunt had never liked Fauziya's mother they told her she was no longer welcome in her home and sent her away. Upon Fauziya's return from school for the summer she was informed by her relatives that she was not going to be allowed to return to school as it was a waste of money. She was also informed that a marriage had been arranged for her with a man who was twenty years her senior and she was to become his fourth wife. And oh by the way he wanted her to be cut(undergo kakia) before consuming the marriage. Fauziya was incredibly distressed and with the aid of her oldest sister and with money sent by her mother she left Togo and flew to Germany where her uncle could not find her.
Fauziya knew no one in Germany but met a stranger at the airport who took her home and befriended her. In the time she spent in Germany Fauziya also met a man from Africa who told her she should seek asylum in the United States. He provided her with a passport which enabled her to leave Germany and fly to the U.S.
So here in the land of the free is where Fauziya's nightmare began. And this is the heart of the book for me. Of course I feel that forced female genital mutilation is a horrendous act and that forced marriage to a horny old man with three other wives is unconscionable but what occurred to Fauziya in the United States is beyond the scope of imagination. She was placed in four different prisons and did you know that illegal immigrants have no rights? no privacy? horrendous food, a joke of a medical system and face constant guard brutality? Hey guys there is something wrong with this picture! She was placed in prison with murderers, had to face the fallout from a prison riot and was never shown the respect that every human being deserves. Fortunately she had a group of lawyers who were working to set her free and to set a precedent for other women seeking asylum. Her appeal for asylum was denied by a judge who had not read any of the briefs about her case. She was denied bail by another judge pending the appeal of her case. She became physically very ill and also very depressed. She had loving friends in the prisons who were fellow immigrants awaiting deportation. She had caring lawyers and a cousin who all cared about her but the INS system put unbelievable roadblocks in the way. Her lawyers were able to get the press involved and her story became well known. So maybe she was released because of the press and publicity about her case and contacts to influential folks who recognized the criminality of how she had been treated.
Realizing this book was written in 1998 makes one wonder if there might have been a different ending for this strong Muslim woman today post 9-11. Fortunately for all of us who care about women's rights and humanity to others Fauziya's story had a happy ending. She was released on parole and granted asylum. But what scars she probably still today carries from her inhumane treatment here in the United States! I believe that she was able to survive because of her strong belief in the Muslim faith and in God and because of the love which was there for her from her friends in the prison.
March 3, 2010
This is the true story of an African girl, Fauziya Kassindja, who sought asylum in America to escape FGM (female genital mutilation) and an arranged marriage to a man 30 years her senior. Her family were devout Muslims, but her parents were more traditional and opposed FGM. Because her father was well-to-do he was able to protect Fauziya and her sisters from this practice. When her father died, Fauziya, who was only 17, was put on an airplane and sent to Germany to escape. She had only a suitcase, no contacts, and no knowledge of the language. After a couple of months she made her way to America because she had heard what a welcoming country this is. What a welcome she received. She was thrown in prison, sometimes with hardened criminals for 14 months. Until I read this book, I never realized how horrible refugees are treated. I never realized how horrible prisoners are treated. Not even the most basic human rights are respected. I didn't even knew that much about FGM. Know I know that hundreds of thousands of women are put through this ordeal, most often with no anesthesia. Girls of all ages go through this depending on the tradition of their culture, from infants to grown women. They have no choice; they have no voice. They all experience excruciating pain, sometimes severe bleeding, infections, and even death. This practice devalues women. What impressed me about Fauziya is that she never ever lost her faith in God. Every day she made time to pray follow her faith the best she could. I guess I can say this book was a real eye-opener for me.
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