Called to Forgive: The Charleston Church Shooting, a Victim's Husband, and the Path to Healing and Peace

by Anthony B. Thompson, Denise George

While the murder of his wife devastated Anthony Thompson, he and three other relatives of victims chose to privately and publicly forgive the shooter. Years later, the church and community still struggle to understand the family members' deliberate choice to forgive the racist murderer. But as Charlestonians have witnessed these incredible acts of forgiveness, something significant has happened to the community--black and white leaders and residents have united, coming together peaceably and even showing acts of selfless love.

This book is the account of Anthony's wife's murder, the grief he experienced, and how and why he made the radical choice to forgive the killer. But beyond that, Anthony goes on to teach what forgiveness can and should look like in each of our lives--both personally, in our communities, and even in our nation. After much pain, reflection, and study, Thompson shares how true biblical love and mercy differ from the way these ideas are reflected in our culture.

Be inspired by this remarkable story and discover how the difficult decision to forgive can become the key to radical change.

Genres: Nonfiction, Spirituality, Memoir, Faith, Biography

249 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 4, 2019

Reviews

[CallMeAfterCoffee · Rating 2 out of 5]

Bracing myself for impact with this one *deep breath*

You either believe in CRT (critical race theory) and thus assume all white people are racist (which is not a biblical standpoint), or you believe and trust in God's Word (The Bible, which shows us the only true path to unity and forgiveness).

While the author does make some great points and truths about forgiveness, it's apparent in the text that he's not applying these principles in all facets of his life. He uses a real true race centred crime to piggy back the idea that racism is all around us, specifically "white racism" and "white racists" as if hatred and evil hold a loyalty to one ethnicity over another. This book about forgiveness became a segue to talk about how American society is based on racist roots (which is CRT, which is literally making judgements about people based on skin tone, which is racism).

The truth of the matter is that hatred is in and around all of us, it doesn't choose it's host based on how a person looks. Evil wants to claim all of us and pull us away from Christ. We as humans are all broken sinners who need Christ to save us. We need to read the Bible (God's Word) and let it guide us. We are fallible and we make mistakes. Christ, however, is absolutely perfect.

This book had such a great base for leading into biblical unity through Christ, but instead veered into CRT's dark and hateful ideologies (not saying this was intentional, but they're there hidden in and around the good biblical message). I understand that we as humans can have Blindspots when we're so close to a hurt or a particular issue, but the fact of the matter is that from God's point of view one type of evil is no better or worse than another. Hatred is no worse in a white bodied person than someone from another shade on the spectrum.

The author pays attention to crimes committed inter-racially, but fails to mention that crimes committed intra-racially are equally reprehensible. We need to be careful as Christians to not let the hate-filled ideologies of the world's "social justice" filter into our hearts and churches to replace Jesus' perfect justice.

As I was reading, I just kept being reminded of how broken we all are as humans and how gracious God is to love us in spite of all the darkness hidden within all of us (whatever the affliction may be). I was reminded how easy it is to see the speck in another's eye and miss the log in our own (please recognize that I know I am not perfect and I try to be fair when I'm making these comments). The best parts of this book truly were when the author quotes the Bible, so my advice is to just go and read your Bible and keep God's Truth in your heart. I'll be praying that this author has his eyes opened about CRT and continue his path to forgiveness and healing outside of his wife's tragic killing. I hold no anger or harsh judgement to him as a person, after all we all make mistakes and we need to give grace to one another.

I don't doubt that his intentions were good and meaningful when he wrote this book, it's like I said, I think we're all prone to Blindspots when we're close to a situation.

A couple of resources that have been helpful in comparing CRT to what we know in the Bible have been @centerforbiblicalunity and @slowtowrite on IG (and probably FB too).

[Angie Miale · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a poignant and Christ-centered memoir and approach to forgiveness. I have a lot to work on to be as forgiving as Christ calls us to be. A terrible person who consumed terrible content murdered this author's wife and 8 others. He was able to forgive the man.

We can all reject racism, as racism is Satanic. This led to a monstrous violent action. This book was very emotional and spiritual. I also appreciated that it was not political as he mentioned the support of both South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley and former president Barack Obama.

It also includes the full Bible study written by Myra Thompson who was murdered, it also includes bible discussion questions based on the content.

The epilogue is a long letter written by the author to the shooter in prison.

I highly recommend to anyone looking for a way to integrate our faith with the failings of the world.

If you seriously view this pastor's forgiving faithful memoir as a threat to your own faith, I feel sorry for you and I will pray for God to direct your thinking.

[Michael · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have had forgiveness on my mind recently, for reasons I don't need to go into in a public book review. Having recently read a book about the horrendous racial terrorism in Charleston in 2015 (Grace Will Lead Us Home: The Charleston Church Massacre and the Hard, Inspiring Journey to Forgiveness, I landed on this book pretty randomly and read it in less than 24 hours. I pretty much inhaled it.

The author is a minister in the Reformed Episcopal Church (a part of the Anglican Communion, I guess. I don't know much about them) and the husband of a minister who was murdered in the Mother Emmanuel AME church five years ago. This book is his story about forgiving the shooter, an evil little bastard named Dylan Roof, and a meditation on forgiveness in the Christian tradition. The author considers many other acts of evil and hatred: the Holocaust, South Africa, Rwanda, Nickel Mines, PA, and numerous other mass shootings in America. His biblically based, Christ-informed thoughts about the healing power of forgiveness are nothing less than inspirational. This man is a bodhisattva. He makes me want to read my Bible.

Beautiful, thoughtful book. I loved it, and it has given me much to think about. God bless this man.

[Lew Button · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not an academic study of forgiveness, although it is well researched and footnoted. This is a book written by man who had to look a killer in the eyes and because of Jesus Christ offer that killer forgiveness. Anthony Thompson's wife Myra was the leader of the Bible study at Emmanuel AME church that Dylan Roof attended before killing Myra and all but one of the others who attended.
Anthony writes about his wife, her life and her murder as he talks about forgiveness.
He explains clearly what forgiveness is and what it is not as he tells a personal story.
He was criticized by some for offering forgiveness but as he clarifies what it really means we see it is never easy to forgive and the sooner the better.
He also offers steps to forgiveness in a very helpful appendix.
This is a must read for those seeking to understand what the often spoken line in the Lord's prayer means when we say Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you’ve never learned about forgiveness or Christ from a southern African American pastor’s perspective, you need to.

Thompson shares personal insight into how he was affected after Dylann Roof’s atrocious act. His thoughts on forgiveness are powerful. His focus is healing. Sharing such intimate details about this is brave with how judgmental people are.

Roof was a diabolical monster. His testimonies and diary entries are sickening. But Anthony Thompson repeatedly testifies even Roof isn’t irredeemable—incredible.

The idea that forgiveness doesn’t have to be accepted to work is repeated. Thompson points out that if forgiveness did have to be accepted, the victim would be bound in the shackles of victimhood.

“As Charleston's Mavor Riley witnessed firsthand the remarkable results of Biblical forgiveness, he stated: ‘A hateful person came to this community with some crazy idea he'd be able to divide. But all he did was unite us and make us love each other even more.’”

Throughout the book the reader can feel Thompson’s struggle with the awful situation of his wife’s murder and being a black man in America. He does not let it stop him from believing in Christ and doing good.

There was a lot of repetition in the book, some of it was nice, some of it felt like too much—a different editor might have helped.

[Nathan Albright · Rating 3 out of 5]

[Note:  This book was provided free of charge by Bethany House Publishers.  All thoughts and opinions are my own.]

This author wants to have things both ways, and it gives this book a rather sinister edge and suggests the author is really not aware either of what sort of forgiveness is required for Christians and what is the appropriate response to the sort of historical wrongs where the author demonstrates considerable bitterness.  While one would like to believe that the author has some sort of insight to pass along when it comes to forgiveness, especially given his admirable efforts at overcoming bitterness at the racist young man who gunned down his wife and eight other congregants at a Wednesday night Bible study at a Charleston, SC church, the author demonstrates considerable bitterness over the burden of racism and slavery that he feels it necessary for frequent (and meaningless) public apologies from people who are not to blame for the suffering of the author and others like him through centuries of racism and slavery.  This gives the book the strange feeling of being a not very forgiving book that is ostensibly about the subject of forgiveness.

This book is a bit more than 200 pages and is divided into ten chapters.  The author begins with acknowledgments and an introduction.  After that the author talks about the tragedy of the Charleston shooting (1), as well as the surprising aftermath when instead of rioting there was a coming together of bipartisan and multi-ethnic hostility to racially motivated acts of violence (2).  The author talks about Dylann Storm Roof and his background (3) as well as the author's decision to forgive (4).  This leads to a discussion about Dylann's journey to violence (5) as well as the author's difficulties in missing his wife after her death (6).  The author then moves to discuss the reaction of the community and nation to the attack, which abhorred the violent attack on peaceful black believers (7), as well as the author's honoring of his wife's wishes when it comes to grief and sorrow (8).  Finally, the author discusses the deadly disease of unforgiveness (9) as well as the author's view of the path of healing and peace (10).  The author also includes as an epilogue his own letter to Dylann, some Bible Study Questions, as well as five appendices that look at a call to prayer, the timeline of the shooting, trial, and remembrance, the author's view of the ten stages of biblical forgiveness (sans Bible citations), an example of a sham apology for Charleston's involvement in slavery, and Myra's Bible study notes on the Parable of the Sower from Mark 4, along with notes.

There is an unpleasant irony in this book that it seems the author is unaware of.  Although the author focuses on the personal forgiveness he showed to a young racist murderer.  Unfortunately, the author demonstrates himself to be deeply unforgiving when it comes to the problems of America's racial history.  Indeed, the author shows himself to have a racialist view of history that includes a strong belief in white guilt, signifying that while he can claim to forgive the murderer of his wife for his violence, he is less willing to overcome his bitterness towards white America for the context of racial hostility between white and black, and indeed in his book he makes no condemnation whatsoever of black terrorist groups like Black Lives Matter who stoke the racialist fires from the perspective of blacks.  This racialist view, unfortunately, greatly undercuts the author's intended message about forgiveness, as well as his own supposed expertise in the subject.  The author and the murder of his wife, in their shared racially motivated worldview do not appear to be so different after all.

[Aurelia Mast-glick · Rating 4 out of 5]

On June 17, 2015, Dylan Storm Roof entered the Emanuel AME Church in Charleston, South Carolina. He went down to the fellowship hall, joined a Bible study, and as they finished the study with prayer, he got out his gun and shot 77 times, killing 9 people, and horrifying a nation. He calmly walked out of the church, got in his car and left. His reason? They had the wrong color skin. His tracker showed that he drove to another church that same evening, sat outside for a few minutes and then left. His regret? Absolutely nothing. And yet, two days later, at his bond hearing, Reverend Anthony Thompson stood up and publicly forgave Dylan, imploring him to give his life to God.

This book was different than I expected. While giving a lot of details about the shooting and the trial, it also pulled in a lot of other hate crimes and really centered the most on Biblical forgiveness. I was expecting more of a story format, but in reality, it is an excellent resource for Biblical forgiveness.

In my own words, I would say Rev. Thompson choice more to forgive for his own purposes than for Dylan. He knew that to remain unforgiving was going to bind Dylan to him, was going to create bitterness, and would delay or even stop healing. By forgiving Dylan, he was able to put Dylan behind him and move forward with healing and hope. Forgiveness is a choice, not an emotion. He didn't want to stand up and publicly forgive Dylan. In fact, he didn't even want to go to the hearing, but he felt God speaking to him and telling him to stand up and speak.

He quotes another pastor in the book and I thought it was so good: "When someone chooses to forgive, we are watching someone pay an enormously heavy and personal cost,...It requires daily 'working out' - a daily willingness to look at the scars of injustice and choose to press deeper into grace instead of turning back toward anger and revenge."

This book was thought-provoking as it looks at the power of forgiveness and the cost of unforgiveness. And even though, to my knowledge, Dylan still lacks any form of remorse, Reverend Thompson and all the others who chose to forgive can live in freedom because they are not bound by hatred and bitterness.

I received this book from Bethany House and NetGalley and was not required to write a positive review. All opinions expressed in this book are my own.

[Monica H (TeaandBooks) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Anthony B. Thompson's wife was shot on June 17, 2015 at Wednesday evening Bible study in Charleston, South Carolina. How do you forgive someone who kills your spouse and is not even remorseful? Thompson tells his story in Called to Forgive.


Called to Forgive is a powerful memoir written by the surviving spouse of someone who was brutally murdered for her skin color. Thompson shares his thoughts and feelings in this book. He also shares the stories of other people who have been involved in shooting or other difficult situations. He tells his story and the stories of others with both compassion and heartfelt details. At the end of the book, he writes a letter to Dylann Roof sharing how and why he forgives. There is also a Bible study that goes along with this book and several appendixes.



While Called to Forgive is quite powerful in content, I especially found Appendix 3, The Ten Stages of Biblical Forgiveness, especially helpful in thinking about instances requiring forgiveness in my own life. I also like how well researched this book is with detailed notes in the back for reference. Thompson also gives us a lot to think about with regards to racial issues in our society, along with forgiveness. As I finished this book today, there were two shootings in different parts of the country that appeared senseless to me. Called to Forgive could be used by God mightily for those who survived or were related to others in shootings as well as those struggling with forgiving someone for other deeds. I certainly think it is a book we could all learn and grow from reading. I highly recommend it.


I received this book from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review. All opinions are my own.

[Bookreaderljh · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Charleston Church shooting in 2015 was horrific. Nine black people died at the hands of a young racist white man after he attended a Bible study with them in the church basement of the Emmanuel Church. He had been welcomed in - the participants never anticipated violence just the sharing of a Bible study - and the murder was pre-meditated with the hope of causing a race war in Charleston and ultimately throughout the US. The gunman did not succeed and Reverend Thompson forgave this person who had taken the life of his wife and the lives of 8 other innocent souls. Why? This book explains that in a complete and loving method. It is heavily religious but is written about in an understandable human way. Rev. Thompson forgave the shooter without wanting anything in return because it is his belief that God forgives us and in return expects our forgiveness of others. It is explained that this doesn't mean there isn't anger and grief and blame against violent acts. But the only way for him to restore his equilibrium and his faith was to forgive the killer. The act of forgiveness makes the actor free - the forgiven one has to fight his own battles with God's grace. Life is too short and too hard to hold judgement over others and to move forward forgiveness grants serenity in ourselves. The Dylan Roof's of the world have their own battles. No race war here - the caring of the victims and their supporters granted caring. A good lesson for all of us who could use reminding that ultimately we can only be responsible for our own lives - good or bad. Great book for reading in February and Black History month and for Christian readers the last part of the book has a specific Bible study and actions for countering this terrible event.

[Emily P · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is another powerful book, written by the widower of Myra Singleton, who was one of the Emanual Nine killed in the Emanuel Church massacre in 2015. After finishing the more journalistic approach by reading "Grace Will Lead Us Home," I was interested in hearing firsthand how those left behind by the loss of their loved ones perservered and moved forward in their grief.

Author Anthony Thompson is also an Episcopal minister who was serving his congregation the evening his wife was murdered by white supremacist Dylann Roof. His journey towards giving biblical forgiveness to the killer is the premise of the book. Thompson shares his opinions on following the example Christ had set for us in bestowing biblical forgiveness to those who have wronged us while still allowing ourselves to grieve and process our losses. Ultimately the message of the book is that biblical forgiveness is truly a release for the person wronged so bitterness does not take root in their heart.

This book is a testament to living out the commands left for us in Scripture, all while understanding that we can walk in forgiveness without ever receiving a response from the ones who've wronged us. I did take many notes and highlighted portions for future reminders. The book has a strong spiritual focus and emphasizes the need for continued growth in our Christian walk.

I enjoyed this book and believe it would be a great book to use in a group as a study on biblical forgiveness. I appreciate the vulnerable way Thompson shares his journey and finds the presence of God is ever near.

[Jill Rey · Rating 4 out of 5]

A chilling story of Myra Thompson, one of the victims of Dylann Roof’s senseless killings in Charleston, SC at the predominately black Emanuel AME Church in June 2015. This is Rev. Anthony Thompson’s story of forgiveness as he recounts the day of his wife’s murder and the milestones since it occurred.

Each chapter opens with a truthful retelling of Dylann, his family or the other families impacted by loss, whether that impact arises from Dylann, the Rwandan Genocides or other senseless murders that have occurred. Rev. Thompson describes his biblical and unconditional forgiveness, different from reconciliation or the need for an apology, in a way that opens your heart to the horrors of the world. Rev. Thompson, his family and many of Dylann’s victims’ families forgave the murders, lifting them of the burden of carrying hatred for Roof’s acts. As recounted in this memoir, the reader encounters the love of a community, brought together in love and forgiveness, rather than hatred and fear. At the back of the book the author provides bonus bible study resources and materials, allowing the reader to participate in activities such as the one Myra so lovely facilitated at the time of her death.

*Disclaimer: A review copy of this book was provided by the publisher. All opinions are my own.

[Evelyn Lilyana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pastor Anthony Thompson writes from a deeper place about forgiveness. Losing his wife, Myra in the Charleston Church shooting in 2015, Pastor Anthony had two choices: wallow in bitterness and hatred or forgive, he chose the latter. How many of us can say that we have struggled in the past to forgive over smaller, insignificant wrongs done toward us? Forgiving the killer of your loved one has got to be one of the hardest things to do.

In Called to Forgive, Pastor Anthony spends a little over 200 pages helping the reader understand the freedom and necessity of forgiveness through his own difficult experience. With grace and love, Pastor Anthony retells his healing process and eventual decision to forgive Dylan Roof and move forward. The last 100 pages help you dig deeper with self-analyzing questions and guide.

This is an important topic for today as we learn to love and forgive as Christ did.

I received a copy of this book from Bethany House in exchange for an honest review. All opinions expressed here are entirely my own.

[Donald · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rev Thompson bares his soul regarding his wife's murder & his journey to forgiving the young man responsible for it. It is eye-opening.

I remember being touched by this story when it first happened & admired the survivors for forgiving the killer in Christlike love. This had to be a tough story to share but it speaks volumes to the Christian community about forgiveness.

He shares what Biblical forgiveness is in contrast to worldly forgiveness, breaking down wayward beliefs along the way. It is interesting how he brings the world's questions about his forgiving Dylann into that contrast.

I am a Pentecostal, Rev Thompson is Reformed Episcopal. So many times we focus on denominational differences, but let me tell you, there is no difference between us on this teaching of Biblical forgiveness. He is spot on.

If you are dealing with anger, hurt, unforgiveness & bitterness, I would highly recommend this book to you. Prayerfully read it & let God speak to your heart. I promise you, it will transform you life. It did Pastor Thompson's & it did mine.

God Bless You.

[victoria · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was inspiring writing and compelling to read with that also had a true story of Pastor Anthony Thompson’s wife, Myra who has murdered at Emanuel AME church in Charleston with eight other on June 17, 2015. The story of heartbreaking in this book will give you to understand deeply of biblical forgiveness, how it work, This will encourage to many of us who had lost love, life and everything you had to become hate and looking for blame someone or anything with all this act, making the decision, with God’s help, to let it go and forgiveness. I highly recommend to everyone must to read this book. “ I received complimentary a copy of this book from Bethany House for this review”.

[Jasmyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredible. I was so grateful for his explanation of biblical forgiveness. There are so many secular misconceptions about what forgiveness means, but sticking to the word of God he explains forgiveness beautifully, simply and powerfully. Especially by using his own story of forgiving the white supremacist who murdered his wife at a Bible study class at their local church. This book is so relevant for our culture of road rage, quick offense, retaliation and revenge. There's a better way and Mr Thompson outlines it beautifully in this book.

[Ph. D. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Even an unspeakable tragedy can be used for good. But only through forgiveness.

In a society that encourages and even celebrates redemptive violence, the author finds closure not through revenge, but through forgiveness. His act of will unites the city of Charleston and thwarts the plan of the killer to start a race war. Thompson's decision to forgive gives meaning to the horrible death of his wife and eight other innocents.

"Am I in place of God? You intended to harm me. But God intended it for good." Gen 50:19-20

[Deborah LaRoche · Rating 5 out of 5]

An incredibly powerful look into the whole size and scope of forgiveness - what does it mean (and not mean) for a victim to forgive a perpetrator? Are there transgressions that are just TOO horrible to forgive? Does the perpetrator have to accept forgiveness for it to "work"? He raises all of these questions and more in an insightful and honest way, without ever losing sight of the grace of Christ flowing through all of it.

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

It’s actually a really good book. Very well written and thought provoking. I’m just too sensitive to read it. I made it a good portion of the way through the book, but couldn’t finish it. It’s a good message of love and forgiveness in the most tragic of circumstances, though.

[Andrew A. · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book to go to when questioning why one should forgive. It's a hauntingly beautiful book - repetitious in some areas, but makes you want to meet the author and hear a sermon or just give him a hug. Highly recommended.

[Jane Harper · Rating 5 out of 5]

I cannot imagine a better Christian message than this one! Rev. Thompson has given us a roadmap for forgiveness and forgiveness under the most horrible circumstances. I am grateful for his Christian example and I wish him happiness in the future.

[Kathryn Spurgeon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Touching

A heart breaking story, this is well written and kept my interest. One of the best examples and explanations of forgiveness I’ve ever read, even though I don’t know how anyone could get through all the questions at the back.

[Ed Gurak · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best book I’ve ever read on biblical forgiveness. A must read.

[Eugene · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the most transformational, important books I could ever hope to read!

[Carol Foss · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very good on topic of forgiveness.

[Tracy Hudson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Tearfully moving account of author’s transfer of God’s grace to the perpetrator of a senseless act doubly heinous by the racism involved.

[Kathy May · Rating 5 out of 5]

A remarkable story of one man’s forgiveness and how the city’s Charleston responded in love to a heinous and despicable act.

[Greg Katz · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve read various books on the mass shootings in the US. The authors perspective as himself a minister was helpful and enlightening. It was more personal and less newsy.

[Linda · Rating 5 out of 5]

A well written story of forgiveness.

A great study of the value of forgiving even the unforgivable. I’m sure I will be referring back to this book in the future.

[Shawna G · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm really grateful for this perspective of God's view of forgiveness and how it is different than ours. A challenging however hopeful read.

[AnnMargaret McCraw · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the most meaningful and impactful books I have ever read.