*I read this book ages ago and upon reflection it is one of the worst books I've ever read and I feel like can't compare with a lot of the 2-star rating I gave it so, down to one star it is lol*
*tbh probably 1.5 stars but I had fun writing this review so I'll round up*
So I'm going to preface this review by saying that I only read this book because my boyfriend and I were in Barnes and Noble and we had this brilliant idea that he would pick me out a terrible sounding book to read, and then I would write a review on it. As a joke. So. I didn't go into this with amazing expectations and lo and behold, this book didn't even meet those lol hELLPPPP.
Here is the report I wrote my boyfriend hahahahaaaaaaa
The XY BOOK REPORT:
Review:
So this book sucked. It’s unfortunate because I know how hard authors work on their books but like…did people actually work on this….? I had a good time with this whole joke in the first 100 pages or so because the book was so absurd, but eventually it got old and I didn’t want to read it anymoreeeee. The plot went nowhere, any attempt to be “deep” or “meaningful” failed (because it was all goddamn clichés), and nothing really made sense. The world wasn’t developed at all—I had about a million questions once I reached the end of this book. How can these women have children without men? How did Mason find his mom? What are these council meetings? How exactly does the virus work? How do the sanctuaries work?
This book is so strange because it just feels like I read 320 pages of a skeleton of a story that wouldn’t work even if it was written well. It also has this uncomfortable feminist vibe—and LISTEN, I’m a feminist, but this book was brutal to men; they are not cast in any good light. In the author’s note, the author talks about wanting to bring a different perspective to gender, but I dunno…I have just come away with a rather uncomfortable eck feeling.
Basically, this book was such a weird experience that it’s even hard to articulate exactly how I feel about it, other that it was not good. Hopefully, if this can get published, one of my books can also one day be published.
Live Thoughts:
-The book starts off by the author letting you fill in a blank so you can dedicate the book to yourself. I feel like this is the author trying to get pity readers, aka a cry for help. Naturally, I dedicated it to you.
-I am literally three lines in and I already fucking hate this book. Why are you doing this to me??? There’s this thing that I know writers do because I myself am a writer who starts books. Let me explain: when authors are starting a book, they try to make every single line of the first chapter all clever and fun to like SHOW OFF our CHARMING WIT. Usually, this get fixed to not stand out so much. HOWEVER, here, it has not been. A prime example of this is: “Too bad, so sad, bye-bye—that’s what her granmumma Kate (who refuses to be called Granmumma) says about all the things that once were and are no more. Too bad, so sad, bye-bye.” P.S. why is everyone called “mumma”? What was wrong with Mom?
-Page 3, already got some more gold. “A stranger in strange clothes. Under a filthy white T-shirt, an enormous, black tick shape on it, a flat chest without even the tiniest of breasts rises and falls.” OH MY GOD AND THEN “There is a lumpiness in the crotch” LORD JESUS SAVIOR HELP ME.
-Another pet peeve of mine—the fucking prologue is written in third person but the actual book is written in first person. I know it’s meant to be all existential and dramatic but it’s just unnecessary.
-I am aware this report is already like a page long this is going to be like 20000 pages Antonio.
-This author is trying so hard to make the writing dramatic. Random use of bolding letters and CAPS are throwing me OFF.
-After a riveting chapter 1, chapter 2 begins with the beautiful line, “I glance back, midsprint, see it hauling its shiny, red leggings. See a penis, dangling. Scrotum. Strange, floppy things, all of them.” How did anyone write this???????
-Okay…so the main character has just explained that there are no men in her community, that she’s never seen one, but that someone is able to choose to make themselves male. I might be reading too much into this, but I’m kinda unsettled at this book making the allusion that a transgender man isn’t a real man.
-Every line in this book either doesn’t make sense or is trying to be dramatic and isn’t. You know how I said at the beginning of books authors sometimes try and be excessive before moving on into their “real” writing style? Well I guess I’ve entered hell, because this is the real writing style ladies and gentlemen. Annnddd I hate it.
-“My mumma has left the pointless kitchen conversation and is washing her armpits in the sink.” Is this normal? Am I missing something?
-Chapter 9 is named “Poo.” Can I die now?
-I’m about 100 pages into this book and nothing really has happened. There keep being random diversions that take up unnecessary space and make me want to pull my hair out. Like right now, we’re having a conversation about poop. I wish I was kidding.
-Another petpeeve of mine: when all of the names in a book are stupidly mixed between “normal” name and “fantasy” name with no explanation. We got River, Sweet, Plat, Yaz, Akesa, Silver-Moon (my personal fav), and then we got Kate and Mason.
-NOTHING IS HAPPENING
-I really just want this to be a book about the Amazons from Greek Mythology. Can someone do that for me? Thanks.
-Guys. There’s a random division in this book (like, the book is supposed to be in parts, but part 1 didn’t have a title) that’s called “A Boy on Planet Girl.” #yikes Are we in a horrible Disney Channel Original movie about aliens? I think soooo
-Real critique, all joking aside: my number one problem with this book is that it’s trying to be very dramatic and humorous at the same time, but fails at both. This entire story just feels like someone wrote terrible fanfiction, and their friend edited it the best they could, but since it was a friend, they were unable to tell them it was terrible.
-I’m about 200 pages in and nothing has happened. The other biggest critique I have is that this book is truly BORING. I have a feeling it’s supposed to be a character-based book, but the characters are one-dimensional. The world is confined to this one house. Nothing is interesting.
-The only way I’m getting through this quickly is that the writing is so quick and choppy and makes no sense haha. For example, there’s this line “My secret things were my little, fiddly electromechanical projects—things I took apart and put back together again—the bones of birds, and feathers, feathers, feathers.” Uhhh do those two pieces of that one sentence seem like two different thoughts smashed together to you? Or has this book just driven me crazy?
-The best way I can describe this book is that it’s a very strange concept that goes nowhere, and it tries to be humorous and dramatic, but succeeds at neither.
-There’s about 3 sentences where this book switches to 2nd person because of course it does.
-I have just reached the first what I would call “event” in this book, and I just freaking hate it. Like the book has been rather light-hearted (or trying to be; it hasn’t really been working) so far, and now something super dark has happened and JUST. WHAT!! Tonally, this book is all OVER.
-The event, btw, is that River, the main character, kills a man. It literally adds nothing to the story. River “feels” this morally, but it’s not written well enough for me to feel it with her. I also just don’t understand what this added to the “plot.” (The “ ” is because there wasn’t a plot)
-So the end of this book has Mason (the “XY” rolls eyes) trying to find his mother, and River takes him to this woman to have him do a DNA test. So they do that, and the woman goes, “Okay, this’ll take 24 hours” but then she’s like “JK here’s his mom.” ???? How did they know?? UM?
-lol the ending still doesn’t make sense kewl.