Outside the Charmed Circle: Exploring Gender & Sexuality in Magical Practice

by Misha Magdalene, Michelle Belanger

The intention of Outside the Charmed Circle is to help readers live as the truest expression of their gendered, sexual, spiritual self. It is designed to support you as you awaken to who you are, deepen your magical practice, and walk through the Pagan world. Author Misha Magdalene provides hands-on meditations, prompts, and magical workings to help you explore your identity as it intersects with your spiritual practice. With thoughtful insights on embodiment, consent, and Eros, as well as explorations of self-esteem, ability, disability, and your feelings about your body, this book helps those in the LGBTQIA+ community and their allies engage with a wide range of identities in a magical setting.

Genres: Witchcraft, Queer, Nonfiction, Paganism, LGBT, Spirituality, Magick

299 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2020

About the author

Who are you?

Hello, beautiful creatures! My name* is Misha Magdalene. I'm a multi-classed, multi-geek, multi-queer witch and sorcerer with a degree in gender studies and a slightly odd sense of humor. I'm an initiate of multiple lines of traditional witchcraft, including the Anderson Feri tradition and Gardnerian Wicca. I've also been known to dabble recklessly in both modern ceremonial magic and grimoiric goetia. I've been blogging since 2001, negotiating the online world since 1987, playing Dungeons & Dragons since 1981, and listening to weird music since birth. I live in the Pacific Northwest with my polymath partner, my precocious daughter, far too much coffee-making apparatus, and two adorably destructive little black kittens. My pronouns are she/her or they/them, and I'm fully prepared to give you a cheerful lecture about the lengthy and grammatically correct history of the singular "they" in English.

What do you do?

I write about magic.

More specifically, I write about gender, sexuality, geek culture, pop culture, philosophy, theology, religion, history, political theory, and the ways in which all of these things intersect with the practice of hands-on, DIY spirituality. I'm the author of the Outside the Charmed Circle blog on the Patheos Pagan Channel. Since the blog's inception in August 2017, I've written about the spiritual value of discernment, the inherent political nature of Pagan and polytheist practice, practicing safer sex magic, strategies for countering abuse in our communities, and the true-life story of how Dungeons & Dragons led me to witchcraft.

Like I said, I write about magic.

Here's some of the fulsome praise readers have heaped on my head:

"Well reasoned and unapologetic... Misha Magdalene is a treasure!"
"Educational and challenging... an excellent combination."
"Always thoughtful pieces that critique themselves."
"Sometimes when I'm having a bad day, I just go back through this page and read all the posts I've missed. It helps remind me that there are wonderful people in the world doing wonderful work and talking about the hard things in a beautiful way."

I love my readers.

And then, of course, there are the critics:

"...pretty boring and unoriginal critique."
"Cultural Marxism."
"This might come as a shock to you, but you're not actually different from anyone else just because you're gay or into magicks."
"Just. Shut. Up."

I adore my critics.

What are you up to lately?

Well, after some months of writing for Patheos and having people ask me when my book is coming out, I've come to the realization that I should probably write one... so I did! Outside the Charmed Circle: Exploring Gender & Sexuality in Magical Practice was released by Llewellyn Worldwide in January of 2020.

And whether you’re a reader, a critic, or simply curious, I appreciate your interest in who I am and what I’m doing.

Cheers!

🖤

* This isn't my legal name, but it's not not my legal name, either. As the kids these days say, it's complicated.

Reviews

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5, rounding up. A really solid, wide ranging book looking at the intersections of sexuality + gender with magic practice and Pagan spirituality from a number of different angles, all with the intent to help us all “find a way to live our authentic lives, as the truest expression of our gendered, sexual, spiritual selves” [259]. Magdalene’s writing is succinct and concise, and they define their terms consistently so that their arguments are clear. They bring together queer theorists like Gayle Rubin (of course, given the title!) and Judith Butler with the context of Pagan communities and traditions and pressing issues including inclusivity, consent, power, and community. While inevitably not everything in this book is going to be of interest to any reader – for instance, as someone who doesn’t work with deities at all, there were sections of the book that really felt like they didn’t apply to my practice – I do think that any reader interested in these topics is going to find something relevant to them in this text. If I had to come up with a critique, I would say that queer theory’s critique of identity politics could’ve been made clearer here – ie. it isn’t just that “people don’t like labels” that is the problem from a queer theory perspective, but rather that identity labels tend to ossify and function in normalizing + exclusionary ways (though I recognize that all aspects of queer theory can’t be addressed in this book, of course). I also actively dislike being called “dear reader,” but that is just a personal preference. All in all, a great read. I would not hesitate to recommend this book to any member of any part of the Pagan community.

[Briar 🏳️‍🌈 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Let me start with saying I hate posting when I don’t love a book. I normally don’t share when I don’t like it but this one I know I wasn’t super into because it’s not what I needed or wanted at this time in my life. My partner had pre-ordered this book for me thinking I would like it based on the name. I only skimmed the description after it arrived and got right to work on it a few days later after I finished another book. I thought it would include spells, more rituals other than a few exercises, much more lore and the like. Inspiration for a practice and/or transforming one (it does go over queering a practice but not in the way I was curious about). It was mostly a gender and sexuality studies book you might read in college. With many MANY personal thoughts and experiences from the author (I know many love having that connection to an author but I felt overwhelmed so again, it’s just me), some history and a lot of in depth descriptions about terminology. I really feel like this book could have been cut down to 50-100 pages for a quick run down. It didn’t quite get to the point for me and I didn’t super enjoy it. Though, what’s inside this book I would highly recommend to someone who is exploring themselves and perhaps a new community that’s LGBTQAP and/or magical in nature , learning about gender and sexuality from a less dry and purely scientific viewpoint or who just enjoys learning more and isn’t super familiar with the topics discussed. Almost nothing in this book was new to me (other than the exercises) but it could be for others. I did really enjoy the section on queer deities. That IS something I’ve been wanting to learn more about and wish there had been more! This book also covers consent with gods/spirits and suggestions for dealing with their approaches that doesn’t compromise your wishes. So, it’s not a bad book. It’s just not what I expected at all. Which, is in part my own fault. I’d give it a try if it speaks to you.

[A.R. Marsh · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outside the Charmed Circle: Exploring Gender and Sexuality in Magical Practice, by Misha Magdalene, is so deep, so rich, and so necessary, that in order to do it justice you almost have to quote great heaping gobs of text. I'll try to not do that--I want you to read the book itself.

I was privileged and honored to read a PDF draft in advance. When the book was published I ordered two copies, one for me and one for a family member. This is the kind of book you want to talk about, the kind you want to give to others, the kind that makes you want to shout "YES!" into the oak groves at midnight or wave at passing motorists by day.

In spite of the topic's complexity--taking on the intersectionalities of sex, gender, and magic!--this book is quite "user friendly." Each chapter contains exercises to help the reader think through and experience the material. The appendices and bibliography are also wonderfully helpful.

In the introductory chapter, Misha Magdalene describes their book as "an exploration of magic through the lenses of gender and sexuality." I think the reverse is also true. The book asks also us to examine gender and sexuality through the lenses of our magical practices and beliefs. Magdalene is extremely qualified to write from and through both (and several) perspectives.

Because I am a professional sexuality counselor, deeply committed to supporting people of all sexualities and genders, as well as a practitioner of "witchery," I am doubly excited by the wisdom, commonsense, and vision contained in this pioneering work. I appreicate the expertise that Magdalene brings to this topic, and I predict this book will become a classic!

[Willow · Rating 5 out of 5]

Published On: Flying the Hedge
Published: 12/29/19
Link: https://www.flyingthehedge.com/2019/1...
Review: "I've read a lot of really great books this year on witchcraft, whether it be fiction or nonfiction, choosing to focus less on introductory books and more on specialized fields within magic. This book is no exception, and it is probably one of the most important books I will ever read. Outside the Charmed Circle: Exploring Gender & Sexuality in Magical Practice by Misha Magdalene may not be the book we wanted, but its the book we need, as a community, right now. And honestly, it's not just witches and pagans that need to read this; it's for everyone: witch, Christian, young, old, cis, trans, queer, and straight alike.

Outside the Charmed Circle is an in-depth, academic look at gender and sexuality in the magical community, as the title suggests, but it's so much more than that. Don't let the academic side of the book deter you from picking this one up. Furthermore, stop being afraid of discussing gender and sexuality. It's an uncomfortable subject to be sure, but one that absolutely must be addressed here and now in order for our world to become a safer, more inclusive place. But I digress. Misha, who is a nonbinary witch of 30ish years with a degree in gender studies, speaks with authority, compassion, and even a bit of humor throughout the book. They share their personal stories, some of which are funny and some of which are saddening, but those stories help the reader connect deeply with the subject matter.

The book dives deeply into what gender and sexuality are and what that means within magical practices and society as a whole. Misha covers everything from queer gods and goddesses (I can tell you I learned a lot here!) to sex magic to consent to forming your own magical praxis. I have to say, the chapters discussing consent and the queer gods and goddesses were my two favorite sections. As a victim of sexual assault, I appreciated the thought and consideration that went into the chapters on consent, and that it wasn't just about consent between two humans, but between humans and spirits and deities as well. They were beautifully written, empowering, and so refreshing. There have been a lot of talks lately about consent, sexual assault and homophobic, transphobic, and racist rhetoric and actions by pagan leaders (and those outside our community as well). Many of these "whistleblowers" have been attacked, marginalized, threatened, and forced into hiding because they had the audacity to challenge the idea that maybe some of the things we have been doing need to change. Like many of us, Misha grappled with these issues, even leaving paganism because they couldn't reconcile their beliefs with the atrocities happening within our community. I'm so glad Misha came back and came back with an amazingly brilliant book addressing many of these issues.

But Misha doesn't just tell the reader what is wrong with our community, they ask that we confront our own biases and work through them. There are a dozen or so exercises built into the chapters. Some are as simple as freewriting, while others are more in-depth rituals. I actually worked through every. single. exercise in this book. This is something I have never done before. I usually skip around and say I'll get back to it later, but not with this book. I was in Asheville, sitting alone in the bathroom writing while my SO slept or enjoying an orange in my kitchen in complete silence (apart from my cat Jane who also wanted to partake in said orange). The exercises Misha includes force us to confront our fears, misconceptions, and actions and to really evaluate why we feel the way we feel and why we do the things we do. It was utterly eye-opening to stare at my self naked in front of a mirror for an hour. I didn't want to do it, but I did. I wept a lot during that exercise (and I'm crying again now thinking about it), but I did it and have a newfound respect for what is mine.

The book ends with a call to action, that we have a long way to go and that this book and its exercises are not a one-and-done experience. I have strived to be inclusive, but this book let me know that I still have some changing to do; that I can do even more. So to my fellow queer witches, I'm scooting over on the bench and making some for you at our table.

Before I go, however, I had one issue with the book: the use of the term black magic. Misha probably uses it twice within the book, maybe three times. I found it interesting that a book on being inclusive would use a term rooted in racism. However, I feel this wasn't intended to be disrespectful, but instead, because we do not, as a community, have a word to describe the "darker" side of witchcraft that is universally accepted and understood. Furthermore, it is likely due to his background in the Feri tradition, which uses that term regularly as well as many other Wiccan traditions. But that's for another time.

Outside the Charmed Circle: Exploring Gender & Sexuality in Magical Practice by Misha Magdalene is currently available for pre-order and will be available on January 8, 2020. I encourage you to pick up a copy, share it with friends, and widen your spiritual practice and worldview just a little."

[Talia Franks · Rating 5 out of 5]

The intimate connection between embodiment, gender, sexuality, and magic, laid bare.

Equal parts queer theory and magical theory, this enriching work of nonfiction is an introductory guidebook for modern spell craft and a series of lessons regarding gender and sexuality. Magdalene, a multidisciplinary, multi-classed, multi-queer witch, is an initiate of multiple lineages of traditional witchcraft, including the Anderson Feri tradition and Gardnerian Wicca. Their expertise in both witchcraft and gender and sexuality studies is clear from the dedicated nature of this thoroughly researched text. From the very beginning of the book Magdalene’s thesis is established – that magic is inherently queer, and yet most modern forms of magic and devotional practice center those who conform to cisgender heterosexuality. The book is designed to unpack and adapt modern magical and devotional practice in a way that includes those who, because of their queerness, do not fit into that charmed circle. That said, this is more than a guide for those who hold queer and/or trans identities; Magdalene makes clear throughout the text that this book is for anyone and everyone who wishes to learn about these topics, and their method of doing so is systematic, accessible, and without a sense of judgement or proselytization. While some exercises and examples interspersed within each chapter are designed for those who fall under the umbrella of modern witchcraft and modern spiritual traditions labeled Paganism and Polytheism, others are journaling, self-reflection, and meditation exercises that can be completed by anyone and everyone. Thus, not only is the text informative on a knowledge level, but the exercises are also decidedly useful for introspection.

Whether you fall inside the charmed circle or out, this book will give you a gift in the form of knowing.

[Sidney Eileen · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I was young and first interested in learning about metaphysical things, of course I looked for books. I read quite a few on topics of folklore, but very few which were specifically written for modern pagans and witches. I had a terribly difficult time finding any which suited my tastes and needs.

I wasn’t interested in books of spells, as for me paganism and witchcraft were mostly about my spiritual journey, and I was just fine intuiting how to do the few spells I felt inclined to work. Fancy tools and ingredients were lovely, but with limited funds and space, I didn’t have most of the things these books insisted you needed. Plus, I’m a bit of a contrarian, and tended to balk any time someone said I needed to do things in a certain way with certain components and tools. I felt that respect and intent were far more important than following rigid steps.

I was disinclined to formality, so any books which advocated for elaborate ritual or very specific practices were inapplicable to me.

I would groan when encountering elitism, proscribing ideas and methods which clearly relied upon the practitioner being from a certain economic class, gender, ethnicity, or other privileged group.
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes at books advocating practices using culturally appropriative terms like “shamanism”, and shoehorning them into traditions and ideas and folklore which clearly had nothing to do with actual shamans.

I would sigh and put down the book if it made lofty claims of centuries-old traditions which were immutable and unbroken. They were inevitably referring to cultural and religious traditions which had undeniably been broken and scattered, usually through deliberate oppression and attempts at genocide. Plus, no tradition remains unchanged over the course of centuries, even big religions like Catholicism and Buddhism.

I would get uncomfortable and angry if the book exalted the binary gender or heterosexuality to the exclusion of all else.

I didn’t want a book that exclueded me and my lived experience. I wanted a book that either spoke directly to my lived experience, or, preferably, was written such that it excluded no one. I wanted a book that described principles and explored the foundations of human existence and esoteric experience so I could build my own practice, not a book which presented someone else’s practice as though it was the only kind of practice anyone could need.

Outside the Charmed Circle: Exploring Gender and Sexuality in Magical Practice is exactly that sort of a book, and I’m delighted to have now.

It isn’t a book of spells (although it does have exercises and other work described within). It makes no assumptions about being (or not being) in a privileged group. It does not appropriate other cultures or overinflate itself with the latest buzzwords. It doesn’t beat you over the head with a set tradition (although it mentions many different traditions throughout its pages) or make lofty unverifiable claims to historic enlightenment or lineage. Given its specific subject, it definitely does not exalt the gender binary or heterosexuality to the exclusion of all else.

The topics this book addresses are so complex and loaded that it is incredibly difficult to summarize in any fashion. It starts with the premise that all magical work and paganism are queer, because they are outside the established norms of Western society. From there it moves into explorations of queerness within magical and pagan frameworks.

You do not need to ascribe to any particular tradition or cosmology to find value in this book. It speaks to the human experience, in all its diversity. It is an exploration of that diversity, and how that diversity is reflected in you and your truest self and your truest practice, whether you yourself are queer, genderqueer, cis gendered, or heterosexual.

The vocabulary and structure of Outside the Charmed Circle speaks to Misha’s background in academia, but they take care to explain the vocabulary they use. They acknowledge that although we may use the same words, we do not always assume the same meanings, and in doing so they make the text accessible to anyone, no matter your education level.

Misha acknowledges that these subjects are hard for many people, even those who identify as queer in some fashion. The exercises described in each chapter are designed to aid with deepening your understanding of the topics, and how they specifically relate to your personal experience, whatever that may be. Best of all, they are all doable even if you don’t have a single magical or consecrated tool at your disposal. For the vast majority of them, all you need is your person, a notebook, a pen, and a willingness to truly look at yourself.

Whether Misha is talking about the experience of being queer, the politics of sex and gender, sex magic, queer deities, consent, inclusion, queering your practice, or what they mean when they say “the charmed circle”, they make no assumptions about the gender or sexuality of the reader. They write about experiences and principles, about sociology and psychology, about history and current events. They write about what it is to be human and involved in a magical path. They gently peel back the layers of societal norms, so we can unpack our baggage and better understand what it is that makes us who we are, both inside and outside our magical practices.

For those of you who, like me, experience this life in a queer fashion, this book is likely to be a breath of fresh air. It is a rare validation of the lived experiences of those who are not straight or cis, and how those experiences inevitably affect the magical paths we walk.

For those of you who do not experience this life in a queer fashion, this book can provide a clear view into what it means to be queer, how queerness factors into magical experiences and frameworks, and how we can all be more aware and inclusive of the diversity which is a part of life.

Outside the Charmed Circle is also a magnifying glass to the world and our own souls, beautifully encouraging healthy self-exploration and loving self-acceptance. No matter how you identify, that is always a wonderful thing.

[Angy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is one of the most inclusive I've seen of genders and sexualities that exist outside of the binary, written by a nonbinary author who knows a lot about not only gender and sexuality, but magick. I am recommending this book to even people who are not my witch friends and colleagues, simply because I think there is a lot of powerful information inside that promotes understanding and mindfulness. It's also a good guide for practitioner of magic to check out, regardless of their expertise (or lack thereof).

[Jeremy Shub · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is really disappointing. The writing style is supposed to be funny - if you're also a DnD boffin you'll laugh out loud. It doesn't really follow the title of exploring. There are rambles and magic things to practice, but it falls short if depth or information. It might be great for your 12 year old relative discovering magic. Ubergeeky, slightly sex negative, and very distracted. The chapter discussion about if Gods consent to your magic spells is embarrassing and trivializes important issues.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best explorations of sex and gender I've ever read regardless of the magickal content. Issues of inclusivity and consent are woven throughout the discussions and the entire book is written in a friendly, conversational tone that feels like chatting with a friend. The activities presented in each chapter are useful for exploring one's own relationship with sexuality and gender even if you never intend to practice sex magick. I especially appreciated the discussions about asexuality and sex magick, as asexuality is often seen as unnatural in many Pagan circles. Highly recommended.

[Annarella · Rating 5 out of 5]

An interesting and well written book, full of food for thought. I liked the style of writing, the clarity of the explanations and how it's organised.
I look forward to reading other books by this author.
Highly recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for this ARC, all opinions are mine.

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent guide to the intricacies of magic and queerness and an argument for the queerness of all magic. Particularly useful to practitioners in the LGBTQ+ community for navigating magical communities and spaces, and for straight and cis-genderes practitioners to learn how to slide over and make room for the queer folks in their magical communities.

[Alexandra · Rating 3 out of 5]

A nice look at sexuality in magic. Some good topics and relationships talked about and introduced to readers - some may bot really think about. Nice book to explore.

[Jun · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good book! Very detailed with historical backing and references. Also great information for those who are starting their practices as well as those that already has a developed practice.

[Mara · Rating 5 out of 5]

VERY good. A book I think I'll come back to again and again.

[K Kriesel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great for people who are moderately advanced in Paganism but beginners in gender studies.

[Alan D.D. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Although some passages are interesting and useful, I found the style too heavy and thick. The author kept reflecting on topics for such a length that I got lost in the reading several times.