Ask a Manager. Спитай у керівника: як працювати з нетямущими колегами й босами, які крадуть ваш робочий час

by Alison Green

What do you say when your new job is very different from what you agreed to? How do you tell your boss that your workload is too heavy, or that you need more training? How do you deal with a colleague whose loud speaker phone calls are driving you insane? And how do you repair your reputation after getting drunk at the company holiday party?

Ten years of writing a workplace advice column have taught Green that people tend to avoid difficult conversations in the office because we simply don't know what to say. But the stakes are just as high if we don't speak up, because problems that could be solved with a simple conversation can fester if they aren't addressed.

In this witty and practical guide, Green tackles 200 of those delicate discussions that you need to have, but might not be sure how to begin - and arms you with the wording to do it. Along the way, she shares some of the most outlandish and hilarious letters she's received from readers over the years - from an employee who placed a black magic 'curse' on her coworkers to a boss who repeatedly stole an employee's lunch.

You'll learn what to say when:
*Your coworker keeps pushing her work on you
*Your new job is very different than what you agreed to
*Your boss seems unhappy with your work
*You catch an employee in a lie
*Colleagues keep making judgmental comments about your diet
*Your coworker's loud speaker phone calls are making you homicidal . . . and plenty more difficult or awkward situations you might find yourself in!

Genres: Nonfiction, Business, Management, Self Help, Leadership, Adult, Audiobook

288 pages, Hardcover

First published May 1, 2018

Reviews

[Sheri · Rating 4 out of 5]

Alison Green offers practical advice for handling various work situations with maturity, respect, and diplomacy. Her emphasis on straightforward and direct communication gives you the tools needed to approach your own issue, even if your specific situation can’t be found in her many scenarios.

While I liked the book and find her approach fair and candid, there were a few negatives. I found her advice best suited to the professional office worker; if you are employed in a non-office setting or worse yet, in a less than professional setting, you may find her advice unhelpful and unrealistic. I will say that after reading example after example and thinking yep, that happens in my workplace, I became depressed. The author’s positive thinking and idea that all problems are easily solvable just seemed so naïve. The fact is that many of us work for unprofessional managers and bosses and there simply isn’t much we can do about it. I know others liked this aspect of her advice, the fact that she maintains positivity, but it’s a hard pill to swallow for those who have tried her advice and gained nothing.

I enjoy the Ask a Manager blog more than the book and I recommend that people read both. I find Alison’s blog responses to be more acknowledging of potential difficulties and the comments from readers often bring a broader perspective.

Overall, I liked what she had to say and I found her approach to be honest and intelligent. I am rating this 4 stars because if more of us acted with maturity, respect, and diplomacy there wouldn’t be a need for such books. This is a book that both employee and employer can learn and benefit from.

[Fran (The Ramblebee) · Rating 3 out of 5]

I listened to the audiobook of this. I love Ask A Manager and I find both Alison's voice and her advice very soothing.

One thing that really ticks me off though is her advice on apologising for things like lateness, or resumé typos, which tends to be along the lines of, "I'm neurotic about punctuality so I'm mortified" or "I'm a neurotic proofreader." Neurosis is a mental disorder, not a character trait, and I find Alison's use of it in these contexts incredibly aggravating.

[erforscherin · Rating 3 out of 5]

I first ran across the Ask a Manager blog years ago, during some dark times when I was struggling in a particularly awful workplace. Alison’s advice was calm, measured, and spot-on; her explanations helped me understand that my work environment was not normal, and most bosses didn’t behave like that, and it was well past time to find a new job. I will always be grateful for that, and for the kind community in the comments section.

Ask a Manager is essentially all of that wisdom in the blog condensed into book form, and I so very much wish I’d had a guide like this when I was first entering the workforce. It can be a bit dry in parts, and sometimes the amount of information can feel overwhelming; this is definitely not a book to plow through in one sitting. But if you dip in and out of the sections that are relevant to your own workplace issues, you’re nearly guaranteed to find some good advice that you can take away to apply, whether it’s a carefully-worded script to use or just a new way of thinking about the problem.

There are some sidebar question-and-answer “tales from the workplace” stories that are taken straight from the blog, and frankly I think it’s one of the book’s weaker parts; the advice is perfectly good on its own without the sensationalism. One of the things I’ve always admired most about Alison’s writing is that it’s very honest, but also very positive: every problem has a solution, and often it’s just a matter of communicating more clearly. Particularly as a woman in a male-dominated field, it can be difficult to be assertive without being seen as overly aggressive; her scripts and example language for certain scenarios have been very useful for me to understand how to approach problems more constructively.

I would definitely recommend this book to any new graduates, but also to anyone who’s trying to navigate a tricky work environment (or just plain wanting to become a better co-worker). There are many gimmicky advice books out there, but this is one of the better offerings.

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[Disclaimer: This eARC was provided free by the publisher through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.]

[Caroline · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really enjoy the Ask A Manager blog because it’s filled with interesting advice and strange situations. I didn’t like the book as much, though. The book addressed a lot of common situations that have come up over and over throughout the years of the blog, divided into categories - how to talk to your peers, how to talk to your boss, etc. Most of the advice was given in abstract, though, with only an occasional letter sprinkled in. This made me realize that one of my favorite parts of the blog is hearing the strange stories from various letter writers, even more than the advice itself. I also find the advice more interesting after hearing a letter from a specific person, since then I can imagine what I would do in that situation. If the advice is presented on its own, unless it’s directly applicable to me, it can be kind of boring. Even though the advice seems good, a lot of it isn’t relevant to my life, and I’m looking more for entertainment than help.

I listened to the audiobook, which was narrated by the author, and the narration was really good. I also think the topic of how to navigate tough conversations is well suited to the audio format, since it’s beneficial to hear the tone of voice. I prefer the Ask A Manager podcast for this, though, which follows the same question and answer format as the blog. The audiobook does have a funny advantage, though. When there were questions in the audiobook, Green narrated them herself, whereas in the podcast callers narrate their own questions. Green is a really good narrator, and callers often sound stiff and awkward when asking their questions.

I still enjoyed listening to the audiobook. Just not as much as the blog and podcast.

[Zuzana Kuczyński · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good guide for a lot of work problems with a sensible and tactful approach, I will probably try to use or reference some of the advice in the future when dealing with difficult situations.

[elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you work with people and have to talk to them, chances are there's something in this book that you'll find helpful. Honest, straightforward, useful advice and phrasing.

[Amanda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not bad at all, but pretty basic if you're a regular reader of the AAM blog (like I am). The scripts/suggested wording for potentially awkward conversations are good ideas, though. This is probably more of a reference book than something you really need to sit down and read cover-to-cover - it would probably be a good gift for someone graduating from college or otherwise about to start their first office job!

[Carol · Rating 5 out of 5]

Much like her website, the Ask A Manager book is full of no-nonsense, easily accessible workplace advice from an expert you can trust. In a field where managers often are promoted with zero managerial training, this book is a godsend.
I received an advance copy from the publisher via Netgalley for review consideration.

[Moonkiszt]

Been there, done that.

[Lindsay · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of really great topics in here, and the format makes it a quick read. Of course, Green can't answer all *my* specific questions (though I could write in to her blog), but I feel like I am a little stronger of a manager having this information now. I also started listening to her podcast--some of the topics covered there are duplicated in this book, but I'm still interested to hear if there's any other insight.

[Katy · Rating 4 out of 5]

So much excellent advice, and mostly useful & constructive language for difficult situations. It’s also refreshing to know that those office relationships and coworker quirks you’re trying to navigate are almost universal! Great to keep in your desk drawer or by your computer when you need to know how to handle random situations!

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

Depending on what stage you are at in the employment realm there will be some spots that you skip over. However it gives tips from interviewing to dealing with bad bosses, how to be a good boss to quitting. Everyone will learn something from this book regardless what employment stage you are in.

[Kirsten · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderfully straightforward and useful book for just about everyone who has to work for or with other people. The greatest strength is Green’s scripts for many, many situations.

[EuroHackie · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a faithful and enthusiastic reader of the blog, when Alison mentioned that this book was on sale, I scooped it up!

This book is divided into 4 sections: conversations with your boss, conversations with your co-workers, conversations when you're the boss, and conversations with your job interviewer. In each section, Alison offers advice on 30-50 of the most common scenarios you may encounter in your working life, no matter what your role. I am not a manager and I have no desire to move into management, but it's still helpful to see things from everyone's perspective when approaching a situation.

From the blog, I've learned a lot about how to navigate certain aspects of my own working life, which has been extremely helpful. This is basically the blog boiled down to the basics. Some of the more infamous letters are here (such as the 'call my boyfriend Master' letter in the co-worker section), with Alison's specific advice.

I'd love to see a collection of columns from the blog, but barring that, this is the next best thing. If you are in the working world, I highly recommend you read this!

[thefourthvine · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was hoping this would be a compilation of all the best Ask A Manager letters, but instead it is basic advice for workplace behavior and communication. And that is important, and this would probably be a great book for someone looking for that. It’s just — not for me. I wanted more letters about lunch-stealing bosses, to be honest.

[Sayali Rajwade · Rating 4 out of 5]

Would highly recommend listening to the audio book. The tone of how to respond is quite important in most situations at work, hence listening about it from the author helped a lot!

Also, if you like the book you can check out the author’s blog and podcast - Ask a Manager.

[AMY · Rating 5 out of 5]

287 pages. I received this book as a winner of a contest on Goodreads. I was thrilled to get it. I am sorry it took so long to finish, but other books sort of got in the way. This one is good to absorb slowly. It is divided into several sections - conversations with: boss, coworkers, when you’re the boss and during interviews. This book covers so many situations and how to effectively handle them. For folks who need a little help in wording things just right, it will truly help build your confidence and navigate around landmines that seem to be waiting for so many of us in the workplace. The way the book is written is ingenious because you can stop at any point really or keep going. She has different situations numbered and they are relatively short, breaking it all up nicely. I like how she has wording for conversations that will help a person phrase things politely but still get the message across. The book ends with a summary to help spur a reader onward and (hopefully) upward for positive interactions with others. I found it very helpful and will use it as a reference in the future. I will share it with some of my friends and then plan to revisit it later to see what I have put to use/remembered. I think it would be especially useful to younger workers entering the workplace who are learning to effectively interact with everyone. Yet, even seasoned career folks can benefit from its wisdom. I would like to see her blog and read some other books by her in the future. I truly enjoyed it. Thanks for the opportunity to read this book, Goodreads!

[Anne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have a weird tendency to sometimes buy a non-fiction book, not read it and borrow the audiobook from my library instead because my attention span is short. And then when I'm done with the audiobook I write notes in the book version I bought and underline important tidbits for me to remember. "Ask A Manager" is one of those books.

I want to start out by saying that I'm a long time reader of Alison Green's blog, also titled "Ask a Manager," so I was very excited to see this book come out. It's all about how to have the difficult, sometimes awkward conversations between you, your co-workers, your boss, and even your employees.

The crux of Alison's advice in her book (and her blog) is to speak up. It seems simple, but there are so many people that don't because they're not sure how to handle the conversation or they aren't sure if the issue is worth bringing up at all. Like other reviewers have said, her book is straight forward and cuts to the chase. It's one of those books where you don't have to read it from beginning to end, you can skip around to read the chapters that interest you and come back to the other ones later (If you're not a boss and want to skip to the interview section, you can do it without fearing you won't be able to follow along).

I highly recommend the audiobook because hearing Alison's voice helps us understand how the tone should be in these conversations (Tone is everything!).

All of that said, my main criticism is that this book is largely geared toward people who work in an office environment. I understand that was Alison's work environment, but I find it strange that she never mentions that sometimes having these conversations in different industries could be completely different. The letters sprinkled out are from her blog, which are entertaining reads but you'll recognize them if you're a regular reader of her blog.

"Ask a Manager" is still overall a good read. Even if some of the issues I mentioned, I would recommend this book to a young person who may be new to the workforce or to people who genuinely have no idea how to have certain conversations at work.

[Nadiah Razali · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 for me
Lesson learn from this book, try to learn how to relay certain message and communicate correctly among your peers,boss

[A. Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you, Ballantine and Goodreads Giveaway, for this ARC of Alison Green's latest book. I first found Green's Ask a Manager blog while job hunting in 2012 and have been a loyal reader ever since. This book is like a printed version of that: a handy reference to situations you may encounter at work and how to address them.

The book is divided into chapters--bosses; coworkers; if you're the boss; and finally, interviewers. Each section contains a ton of common dilemmas. For each one, she tells you exactly what you can say and what to do if you hit a roadblock. Green has always advocated being both tactful and direct, and the language reflects that philosophy. It's like having an experienced and caring mentor helping you navigate your most tricky workplace situations.

Featured text scattered throughout the book presents some of Ask a Manager readers' letters and Green's answers to them. Many of these are massively entertaining; even if they seem wacky (trust me, the blog has many of those!), you'll likely find a takeaway. A few features give the reader direct information such as turn-offs to avoid during an interview, or phrases you can use with your boss. I think an index would be helpful, though it's not too difficult to find what you're looking for. This is a book made for flipping, not necessarily a straight read-through, since it's so packed with information.

I haven't found a better work advice columnist than Alison Green. If you want to learn to navigate your workplace with smarts and grace, get a copy of this book. It's a terrific addition to your professional library and would make a valuable gift for someone new to the workforce.

[Christopher Shawn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pulled from a popular blog of the same name, Ask a Manager is exactly what you'd think it is.

Quick, to the point answers and advice for all those sticky situations that pop up in the workplace.

Typical things like loud chewers, stinky co-workers and the like are covered as well as some outrageous cases that were sent in the to author by her fans.

How do you deal with a co-worker in a sub/dom relationship who insists on calling her SO "master" 24/7, including work events?

How do you tell your boss you can hear his NC-17 conversations with his wife when he has the office door open?

This book is full or practical (and entertaining advice) and its listicle-like nature make it a quick, breezy read.

[Lorilin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Over a decade ago, Alison Green created an advice column called Ask a Manager, where she gives advice on how to deal with all kinds of workplace drama. This book is a collection of that advice. It has four sections: 

1) Conversations with your boss (e.g., you missed a deadline, your boss yells at you, you want a raise)

2) Conversations with your coworkers (e.g., your coworker asks nosy questions, your coworker eats your food, your coworker monopolizes meetings)

3) Conversations when you're the boss (e.g., an employee is out sick but posts photos on Facebook of herself at the beach, you've become your friend's boss)

4) Conversations with your job interviewer (e.g., your interviewer knows your current boss, negotiating salary, you haven't heard back from your interviewer)

The advice is very issue-specific and to the point---which is great if your particular problem makes the cut. But even if your situation isn't in here, most of Green's advice boils down to this:  find a way to speak up about your problem in a calm, matter-of-fact, and collaborative way. Assume goodwill on the part of the other person, and then be direct. This approach may not get you everything you want, but it's a good start. 

On the other hand, it's also important to know if you are in a position to speak up in the first place...

Everyone at work has a certain amount of social and professional capital to spend. How much you have is based on how long you've worked at your company, how senior your position is, how well you generally get along with people, how much your work is valued, how much your boss likes you personally, and how accommodating you've been to others. If you're low on accumulated capital, you might not be well positioned to speak up about a difficult or sensitive issue.

Overall, an interesting read. It's not a book you read straight through, but it does have helpful bits and pieces of advice for specific issues. I genuinely learned a thing or two.

Thank you to Ballantine Books and Amazon Vine for the Advanced Reader Copy!

See more of my reviews at www.bugbugbooks.com!

[Elaine · Rating 4 out of 5]

A concise and neatly-organized snapshot of the topics covered in her blog of the same title. The book is broken into chapters based on the work relationship involved: conversations with your boss, with your coworkers, with your employees, and with your interviewer. Each chapter starts with a sort of overview before proceeding into a numbered list of situations. The explanations/suggestions are typically under a page in length, and often only a paragraph long, making this a speedy read.

I will say that if you're even an occasional visitor to her blog, you're probably well familiar with the recommendations in this book (and you'll also probably recognize the choice, juicy anecdotes scattered within, e.g. "My boss thinks he's a Mayan shaman"). If you want to show your support for years of advice, by all means buy the book. If you don't know Green's blog, by all means check it out (and then decide if you'd like it condensed into book form).

I will add that this book lacks an index, which would have made it much handier as a reference. There is a table of contents that I nearly overlooked which at least shows you where each chapter begins, but you will have to skim/re-read to get back to specific points. An e-copy would not have this issue, of course, but I won a print copy in a Goodreads giveaway, so can't complain too much. On the plus side, this paper copy will be easier to loan out around the office!

Ultimately, I absolutely recommend this for anyone new or new-ish to workplace environments, and even those who've been working for a while but find themselves stymied by awkward situations. This book provides a bite-sized introduction covering key/common issues, at least some of which everyone will encounter at some point. Blog-fanatics, otoh, won't find anything new or revelatory however, and as I said, unless you just want to push money her way, you could skip this.

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was interesting. I learned some things about myself and others. Not everything applied to my situation - this is mostly geared towards the corporate world. Still, there were many things that could be applied to a public library or other nonprofit setting.

[Phyllis Barlow · Rating 4 out of 5]

Anyone who's ever read Alison's blog will know what to expect from this book, (and if you HAVEN'T read it, I highly recommend it. AskAManager.org) The blog is letters/comments from readers; this book isn't letters, but advice on how to handle different challenges in the office.
If you know someone just starting out in their career this would be an excellent book to give them, or if you know someone who teaches business classes or is an adviser in a career center it would be a good reference to have on hand.
I won this from Goodreads, and I can't thank you enough.

[Heather F · Rating 3 out of 5]

I first found Ask a Manager while googling "quit new job" on my phone in the bathroom at said new job seven years ago. Her blog is a daily visit for me. I'd hoped this book would be an expansion on that, but frankly it's a recap-something that might make a nice gift for the college grad in your life, but fans will have already read most of the stories and concepts. Also, there are infantile doodles throughout the book which are off-putting. 3.5/5 starts
Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC.

[Nic · Rating 5 out of 5]

I like the author's blog on this topic, so I'm not surprised to find I enjoyed the book. Lots of useful tips and strategies for workplace communication! I think many people would find this a helpful read.

[Brady · Rating 4 out of 5]

if you're a person and have a job you need this book. clearly written with widely applicable principles, this is a book for employees at all levels and in all types of positions.

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Chock-full of useful information for managers and employees alike. Unfortunately, it lacks a comprehensive index of topics, which makes it difficult to use as a quick-reference.

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

A quick read with genuinely useful advice for people at all levels of their careers.