Shave My Spider!: A six-month adventure around Borneo, Vietnam, Mongolia, China, Laos and Cambodia

Adventure Without End #5

by Tony James Slater

FROM THE AUTHOR OF NO.1 BESTSELLING TRAVEL COMEDY 'THAT BEAR ATE MY PANTS!'

Tony James Slater is quite possibly the world’s worst traveller.
And yet, he’s thinking of doing it for a living…

Faced with buying a car and getting a real job – or taking the money and blowing it on a six-month adventure around Asia… well, there really is no contest!

Who wouldn’t want to visit exotic places, like Borneo, Cambodia and China? Who wouldn’t want to tackle the world’s most dangerous hiking path, tangle with the Vietnamese Mafia, and suffer days in the dreaded Mongolian saddle…?
And who wouldn’t want to try five-organ soup?

All he has to do is survive long enough to realise his dreams.
His rainbow-haired wife, Roo, is determined to keep him in one piece – but he’s not going to make it easy.
Six months around Asia will make-or-break them…
Literally.

Join Tony and Roo on an epic journey through the weirdest and most wonderful things the continent can offer. Share their hopes and fears as they battle the wildlife, the elements, and the laws of probability to explore six fascinating and exotic countries.
Together, they will prove one of the cardinal rules of travel: that nothing ever goes according to plan.
Especially when you don’t have one.

Full of mischief and mayhem, this hilarious adventure is one you definitely don’t want to miss.
One thing’s for sure; it ain’t no holiday!


This is a comedy travel memoir, covering Borneo, Vietnam, Mongolia, China, Laos and Cambodia.

Genres: Travel, Nonfiction, Humor, Memoir

624 pages, Paperback

First published May 17, 2016

About the author

Tony James Slater is a very, very strange man. He believes himself to be indestructible, despite considerable evidence to the contrary. He sometimes makes strange faces whilst pretending to be attacked by inanimate objects. But perhaps his single biggest problem is this; he has a mouth so big he is in danger of swallowing his own head. As a result he often ends up far from mainstream civilization, tackling ridiculous challenges and subjecting himself to constant danger. He gets hurt quite a lot.

Reviews

[Joo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tony's been on his biggest adventure yet. It was probably his most researched and planned one too. But ............. well, Tony. The problem Tony gets with any of his escapades and adventures can be summed up in one word. Tony. Just as well his lovely, sensible wife Roo was on hand to keep him slightly under control. But when her back is turned ......

Tony's books are rambling tomes of often mundane daily life stuff. But it's not the daily life a Westerner like me would want to consider. They pack in an awful lot into their days, but often it's because they haven't got enough money to get to where things would be a lot easier.

I won't go into detail of all the places they stayed, but I know I wouldn't like to do China, but Mongolia sounded just wonderful (apart from the hard saddles). Tony managed to describe the nothingness of the Mongolian Desert and the warmth of the people living there in a way that I'd love to see it. Well, apart from the toilet arrangement, and the border control, and the local transport. Hmm. Perhaps it's better that someone else lives it and writes about it for me.

And the great thing about Tony's books - they come with photos. Well apart from the one on his Mongolia page after he's been in the river !!

This book is a lot longer than his previous ones, which are pretty long themselves, but it's never a chore reading them. And with 6 countries, you could think of this as 6 books in one.

http://tonyjamesslater.com/home/photo...

[Sharon Hayhurst · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was the first book I had read by Tony Slater, and with a title like that, I had to read it. This book was so funny that my husband banned me from reading it late at night as I could not stop laughing and insisted on reading passages out to him. Tony and Roo’s adventures and misadventures throughout Asia were just mind boggling, at times scary, informative and oh so entertaining. The chapter on their cruise around Halong Bay has to be one of the funniest things I have ever read. If you love travel, adventure, humour and learning about other cultures, warts and all, then this is a book for you. 5 Stars

[Julie Smith · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thanks to TBC for a free copy for an honest review.

I'm not usually a fan of 'funny' books: in a lot of cases they're just not my cup of tea. The prologue hooked me in! Why are the Chinese Military after him? To find out read the book!

Well I did and found out why (no spoilers). Parts of the book were very funny but most of it not.

Lots of people will have a different sense of humour to myself and I think they will really enjoy it

[Jirinka (sony08) · Rating 5 out of 5]

http://noemptyshelveshere.blogspot.co...

I have never read a book that made me giggle more; a book that would inspire me travel and put me off at the same time.

Tony is hilarious and I will be seeking out his other books. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but the book sounded like a good idea and it seemed like something to lighten my days a little.

Well, it certainly did that. I giggled my way through this brilliantly funny travel journal, getting some funny looks at the gym. It really did brighten my days and made the countries Tony, Roo and Vicky visited so much more appealing. My favourite most possibly being Vietnam. It sounds amazing!

Things do go wrong for Tony, but those mishaps are so worth the books we get out of them. Tony’s humour has a natural, effortless flow and teamed up with so much interesting information about the visited countries, this makes for a fabulous and entertaining read.

Thank you so much to Tony and TBConFB for letting me read this book in return for an honest review.

[D. Messing · Rating 5 out of 5]

***** I received this ARC for free from TBC on FB in return for an honest review *****

My goodness why had I not found this author yet????? I absolutely loved it, and devoured it in just a few days despite having sick kids the entire time! I've travelled a bit in Thailand myself, and found myself gasping and nodding along with his experiences, and also my kindle was banished from bed for shaking the bed with laughter! I loved his down to earth, self deprecating writing that didn't varnish it, and hilariously told it as it was. I don't think he intended for a lot to be funny, but in the happening it became side-splittingly funny, and has now ignited my nine year olds desire to travel and do the things that he read about with mom! Well done!

[Anne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Adventure in book form.

I've read all of Tony's books and enjoyed every second of each of them. Each book is different and fantastic in their own way.
I love the way his voice comes through. It really is like sitting down around a campfire and listening to a friend tell you about his escapades.
There was laughter. There were tears and there were heart stopping moments. It's well written and well paced.
Tony and Roo do need their own travel show though. That would be fantastic.
Two thumbs up!

[Angela · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a former Bill Bryson fan the buzz about this book intrigued me and I wasn't disappointed. Laugh out loud funny, this author has a unique and witty voice.

I've travelled around some of these countries in this book myself so have to say I was doubly interested in the content because of that. Tony James Slater puts a unique spin on his self deprecating travel reports in a down to earth way. Though I would suggest if you plan to travel it would be wise to avoid where ever he is traveling as his trips don't always go according to plan.
Highly entertaining and a right rollicking good read.

[Sue Wallace · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tony James Slater is quite possibly the world’s worst traveller.
And yet, he’s thinking of doing it for a living…
what can I say I was laughing so much. the things Tony did. I didn't think anyone could get into trouble like he did. This was a very very enjoyable read I loved how it was written too. the characters were fantast8 what a read. loved loved loved it. I would highly recommend it. 10* thanks to TBC and the author for the arc.

[Himanshu · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have never laughed harder while reading a book, truly. Tony has a writing style that is at once self-deprecating and also hilarious. Having travelled through some of the places he describes, I could relate to a few of his tales, but he pushes it to the limit (and sometimes beyond).
His wife Roo is funny too and we're joined by her sister and the trio make the trip worth the read.

[Terry · Rating 5 out of 5]

So do you settle for a real job & buy a car? Or travel the world & see Borneo, Cambodia & China?
I know what I'd choose & so did Tony & Roo.
They see Orangutans feeding, perfect vision through this book. Tony finds leeches where he didn't need to find them!
Funny and descriptive, travel just gets more inviting, maybe not that far for me though!
Great fun book.

[Ellie Shepherd · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious and cringeworthy in places. A true story of Tony & Roo's adventures trekking across Asia which grabs you from the first page and throughout. I couldn't stop chuckling and reading parts out to my husband on our holiday. A real, feel-good book particularly for those who enjoy travelling. Thank you to TBConFB and Tony for the opportunity to read it, a great read.

[Becky Brabrook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Have enjoyed all of Tony's books! Fascinating how, without trying, things go wrong for him. Enjoy the backpackers view of a country rather than the 5 star hotel tour! A fun read! Thanks Tony and Roo!

[Katie Chapman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another Homerun!

Reading Tony James Slater is always entertaining and full of laughs. The other great part is how he infuses his adventures with history, archeology, ecology, and sociology. Oh...and lucky for him, his wife is a really good sport.

[Henrik Rostoft · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was as good as his other books. Really funny, and always good for finding out what not to do when traveling.

I hope he survives another travel, so I can read about it.

[Rachel · Rating 2 out of 5]

A lot of travel memoirs tend to be scored low, with reviews critical of the author for being too introspective. Those are my favorite types of books.

This travelogue is just that - a travel log - and there is very little introspection, making this a tough 180,000 words (no page count but estimated at 400) to get through. It's scored quite high, but for me, it was a painful read.

Let me summarize the book for you:

First we did this, then we did this, then we did this, then we did this, insert innuendo
Then we did this, then we did this, then we did this, haha aren't I crazy?
Then we did this, then we did this, then we did this, everyone thinks I'm crazy, see?

I didn't laugh once, but the author sure laughed a lot - at the locals of each country he was visiting. I can't count the number of times he took in a situation by pointing and laughing at how stupid the locals were.

There was definitely a story in his book but it needed to be half the length. For each interesting experience, there were endless mundane details about what they ate for breakfast, repetitive descriptions of long bus rides, and what his wife took pictures of. I think the book would have been infinitely more fascinating if he's boiled it down to the truly remarkable experiences (of which there definitely were many) and toned down his bad attitude.

One other critical review had mentioned there were no stories of other "characters" on the road. That was a super insightful comment. Tony and Roo truly come across as tourists, not travelers, spending their journey "point and laughing" rather than getting to know people. Even their own character development is lacking - the author never introduces who they are, what they think or feel beyond superficial emotions of awe and frustration.

The high reviews indicate that a lot of people DO like this style of writing. For me, it was a 400-page TripAdvisor review.

[Rob Vitagliano · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wild adventures around several countries in Asia

I've enjoyed the travel aspects of these books especially because they're places I don't see myself ever going, and Tony Slater does a nice job of explaining them to someone like me who is far from a traveler. Though there weren't as many laugh out loud moments in this one, I was still better off reading it alone so when I did randomly cackle at some description or happenstance, my wife wasn't tempted to throw a pillow at me. Here's one of my favorite quotes explaining how Slater felt about a particular adventure he was in the middle of. Warning, it's a bit graphic, but I found it utterly hilarious.

"I mean, Bear Grylls is obvious off somewhere shaving his pubic hair with a live piranha, whilst other daredevils are throwing themselves off skyscrapers strapped to a frame tent. But for me, living in some approximation of the real world, this was as good as it could get."

See? Not for everyone, but I think in times as serious and dire as these, we all need some levity and to entertain ourselves with something lighthearted, and Slater has been more than happy to oblige over the course of five books. On to the next one, then!

[Tiffany · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author spends a lot of time telling us about how his travel adventures are oh so crazy and he gets himself into all kinds of jams and after a while I was like "Show, don't tell." Because the truth is, while a few of his jams are unusual, most of them are the kinds of thing anyone who travels outside of a high end package tour of Europe is going to encounter. Food poisoning and an ATM that eats your card are to be expected when spending six months in Asia. I'm surprised it didn't happen more often.

I enjoyed the chapters about Borneo and Mongolia the most, as those are the destinations I know the least about. The China chapter made me sad because they didn't eat any of the best food. Even in Xi'an's Muslim quarter they couldn't seem to find any good food and while it's true I traveled there several years later, I can't imagine that Xi'an's amazing street food scene is a recent invention. Laos and Cambodia get short shrift, despite a lot of enthusiasm for Angkor Wat.

[Evangeline · Rating 4 out of 5]

I never thought I'd read a travel memoir that made me want to hit the road myself, and avoid it in equal measures! The author is a (mostly) loveable idiot with a penchant for finding trouble everywhere, which is great as it both serves to make you feel better about your own past and future travel mishaps and reminds you that things do often go wrong and travel isn't always easy and wonderful, and it's highly amusing to read about too! For me, I'd have liked to hear more about wildlife encounters, and the Cambodia and Laos sections which petered out toward the end, although Tony does explain that due to tiredness and sickness they simply didn't see or do as much there which is understandable. I look forward to reading about more of Tony's adventures.

[Pauline Armstrong · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love a bit of armchair travel, and Tony James Slater can certainly help to scratch that itch! This book centred on an Asian adventure, and I was regularly diving into my search engine, in order to read more about an area for which Tony had whetted my appetite. His books are written in a hugely enjoyable fashion, and I defy you not to laugh out loud on at least one occasion. Armchair travel can broaden the mind, too. Educational information is there at every turn, and I must register my boundless admiration for Tony's wife, Roo, for her fortitude in being the travelling companion of such an (let's settle for) 'adventurous' person

Now, I wonder how much it will cost me to get to Mongolia??

[Charlie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fantastic book by a very affable young man that has fairly bad luck and a fairly crazy sense of adventure. The guy seems so charismatic that you can't help but feel bad for him when things go wrong. Then again, it's still pretty funny so his loss is my gain.

A good travel book makes you want to visit the places described. This book makes me want to go to *some* of the places described but only with an organized tour group because some of the situations in Asia sound terrifying. Whereas I'd be a statistic about dead tourists, Tony manages to make the best of it.

[Lucinda Clarke · Rating 4 out of 5]

I you have done very little traveling and are considering exploring the world for the first time, it may be better not to read this book. It is very entertaining but contains some horror stories that leave you gasping. It was fascinating to read the author’s take on places I have also visited, but my experiences were competitively tame in comparison. He and his wife took chances most of us would not, but they returned to Australia months later I one piece – or is that a spoiler? He lived to write about the tale. Full of interesting information, well written and amusing, a fun book.

[Carol Rode · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another great book from Tony James Slater

I don't know how they could do that kind of travel across some of those countries. Staying at some of those hotels, yikes. But they were brave or maybe crazy enough to do it. I couldn't or even dare to try. It was exciting to hear what they did and the problems they shared along the way. I'm getting to their last book now if it is the last. But all I can say all his books so far have been pretty great. Great writing Tony. Keep it going.

[Tammy Horvath · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another hilarious adventure.

Slater’s refusal to get a “real job” is the gift that keeps on giving, delivering one hilarious misadventure after another. You’ll be hooked from the first sentence. The only downside? There’s never a dull moment. Slater outdoes himself with each new book. The audiobooks narrated by Tim Campbell take the experience to another level. Campbell’s delivery is fabulous. I know when I finally meet Slater in person, his voice will probably sound different. Regardless, I’m eagerly looking forward to future books from this fantastic author.

[J · Rating 4 out of 5]

Laugh out loud funny! Slater isn't the best writer in the world (as he well admits), nor is he the best traveler (also readily admitted). In fact, he seems to act like an entitled Westerner (I might have thought he was American) everywhere he goes! Whether you applaud or decry his antics, his storytelling is hilarious and he makes me want to run away from my cubicle out into the big, wide world!

[Lynette Brown · Rating 3 out of 5]

Glad you enjoyed it, but not my travel style

Greatly enjoyed the books on traveling Australia and New Zealand but the Asian countries visited in this book confirms my preconceived ideas of traveling there and I’ll pass on those. However Mongolia sounded really interesting as long as you’re prepared for the primitive conditions. My sympathies to poor Roo for the predicaments she has to tolerate.

[Cara Weber · Rating 5 out of 5]

Uniquely entertaining and charming

As always Tony's travel memoirs are full of success, disaster, and many many good times. For the average, middle class arm chair traveler, reading his tales you'll find he & Roo highly relatable and enjoyable. If you've been reading from his first book then odds are you're already in love with this zany travel writer & his patient wife, and are eagerly anticipating the next book.

[Michael Wagner · Rating 5 out of 5]

love your book, absolutely worthless travel guide but it made me feel better when I made a traveling mistake to think at least I didn't shave my spider lol. thanks for writing this book it kept me motivated to work a terrible job. I meet my wife in vietnam and live the best life of my life. thanks and God bless

ps i read your book like 18 times

[Bruce · Rating 5 out of 5]

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Pure Tony . As he has said himself the language is a little much in places . I love his self deprecating humor and his sense of adventure. Oh to be young and travel the world with a beautiful woman ! Oh yea Tony include more pictures of Roo in your next book : )

[Suzette · Rating 5 out of 5]

Extremely Funny Book!!

I’ve read all of the author’s books, and so far this one has to be the funniest! My family is usually rolling with laughter whenever I read them excerpts. :) Looking forward to reading the next one!!!

[Ellen Bryant · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a really honest and humourous travel memoir. It had me laughing a lot of the time and if you travel a lot you will relate to the difficult moments of such a trip. An interesting and entertaining read.