What do you think?
Rate this book
The Wind Blows Backward
Lauren and Spencer share a love of poetry, and both have problems with their parents. But when Lauren realizes that she is falling in love with Spencer, she also begins to recognize his moody and self-destructive side.
272 pages, Paperback
First published April 20, 1993
26 people are currently reading
1341 people want to read
About the author
Mary Downing Hahn
71 books4,382 followersI grew up in a small shingled house down at the end of Guilford Road in College Park, Maryland. Our block was loaded with kids my age. We spent hours outdoors playing "Kick the Can" and "Mother, May I" as well as cowboy and outlaw games that usually ended in quarrels about who shot whom. In the summer, we went on day long expeditions into forbidden territory -- the woods on the other side of the train tracks, the creek that wound its way through College Park, and the experimental farm run by the University of Maryland.
In elementary school, I was known as the class artist. I loved to read and draw but I hated writing reports. Requirements such as outlines, perfect penmanship, and following directions killed my interest in putting words on paper. All those facts -- who cared what the principal products of Chile were? To me, writing reports was almost as boring as math.
Despite my dislike of writing, I loved to make up stories. Instead of telling them in words, I told them in pictures. My stories were usually about orphans who ran away and had the sort of exciting adventures I would have enjoyed if my mother hadn't always interfered.
When I was in junior high school, I developed an interest in more complex stories. I wanted to show how people felt, what they thought, what they said. For this, I needed words. Although I wasn't sure I was smart enough, I decided to write and illustrate children's books when I grew up. Consequently, at the age of thirteen, I began my first book. Small Town Life was about a girl named Susan, as tall and skinny and freckle faced as I was. Unlike her shy, self conscious creator, however, Susan was a leader who lived the life I wanted to live -- my ideal self, in other words. Although I never finished Small Town Life, it marked the start of a lifelong interest in writing.
In high school, I kept a diary. In college, I wrote poetry and short stories and dreamed of being published in The New Yorker. Unfortunately, I didn't have the courage or the confidence to send anything there.
By the time my first novel was published, I was 41 years old. That's how long it took me to get serious about writing. The Sara Summer took me a year to write, another year to find a publisher, and yet another year of revisions before Clarion accepted it.
Since Sara appeared in 1979, I've written an average of one book a year. If I have a plot firmly in mind when I begin, the writing goes fairly quickly. More typically, I start with a character or a situation and only a vague idea of what's going to happen. Therefore, I spend a lot of time revising and thinking things out. If I'd paid more attention to the craft of outlining back in elementary school, I might be a faster writer, but, on the other hand, if I knew everything that was going to happen in a story, I might be too bored to write it down. Writing is a journey of discovery. That's what makes it so exciting.
In elementary school, I was known as the class artist. I loved to read and draw but I hated writing reports. Requirements such as outlines, perfect penmanship, and following directions killed my interest in putting words on paper. All those facts -- who cared what the principal products of Chile were? To me, writing reports was almost as boring as math.
Despite my dislike of writing, I loved to make up stories. Instead of telling them in words, I told them in pictures. My stories were usually about orphans who ran away and had the sort of exciting adventures I would have enjoyed if my mother hadn't always interfered.
When I was in junior high school, I developed an interest in more complex stories. I wanted to show how people felt, what they thought, what they said. For this, I needed words. Although I wasn't sure I was smart enough, I decided to write and illustrate children's books when I grew up. Consequently, at the age of thirteen, I began my first book. Small Town Life was about a girl named Susan, as tall and skinny and freckle faced as I was. Unlike her shy, self conscious creator, however, Susan was a leader who lived the life I wanted to live -- my ideal self, in other words. Although I never finished Small Town Life, it marked the start of a lifelong interest in writing.
In high school, I kept a diary. In college, I wrote poetry and short stories and dreamed of being published in The New Yorker. Unfortunately, I didn't have the courage or the confidence to send anything there.
By the time my first novel was published, I was 41 years old. That's how long it took me to get serious about writing. The Sara Summer took me a year to write, another year to find a publisher, and yet another year of revisions before Clarion accepted it.
Since Sara appeared in 1979, I've written an average of one book a year. If I have a plot firmly in mind when I begin, the writing goes fairly quickly. More typically, I start with a character or a situation and only a vague idea of what's going to happen. Therefore, I spend a lot of time revising and thinking things out. If I'd paid more attention to the craft of outlining back in elementary school, I might be a faster writer, but, on the other hand, if I knew everything that was going to happen in a story, I might be too bored to write it down. Writing is a journey of discovery. That's what makes it so exciting.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 161 reviews
March 22, 2025
✰ 4 stars ✰
[image error]
After my recent rage-re-read of my first ever Mary Downing Hahn book from when I was ten years old, I was a bit wary that my re-read of the book that I read when I was thirteen would have a similar reaction. The instance I read these immortal thoughts of seventeen-year-old senior Lauren at her job as library assistant - 'the aisle was empty. I was alone. Just me and hundreds of books—my idea of paradise' - a sentiment that spoke to my soul, I knew that this reread would be something special. 📚💓
I saw a lot of myself in Lauren and her feelings for Spencer. Being best friends with him throughout their childhood and then harboring an intense secret crush on him in the eighth grade, only for them to go their separate ways in high school without speaking a word to one another - he being Mr. Popular, Prince of Jocks, and she the Mouse who stayed buried in the books and in the shadows - only for a chance re-connection over their love of poetry for their paths to once again cross.
It reminded me of my own lingering feelings for one of my childhood friends and for us to have also parted ways in high school, the object of my unrequited affection never knowing what he meant to me. And yet, our friendship was so deep that if he asked me to break the school rules - he would be the exception to my staunch good-girl persona. Him and only him. 😮💨
“I was taken over by emotions I didn’t understand, couldn’t control.
When he let me go, he whispered, “The loneliness isn’t so bad now.”
In that sense, I did not fault Lauren for the extreme leniency she gave Spencer, for both his emotions and his compulsive, if not uncertain nature. Because when you care for someone deeply enough, you'll do anything for them, even at the risk of your own happiness and well-being. 😔 And just for them to finally notice you again and want to spend time with you - seeing that you're the only one who understands what they're going through - if you're still holding onto those feelings of wanting him - wouldn't it be worth it to hold on just a bit longer?
It was a roller coaster of emotions in which Lauren was reintroduced into Spencer's life, connected over their mothers' benign neglect, and finally saw how much he's deeply hurting over a traumatic past that has affecting him so viscerally that he's grounded himself in dark thoughts - depressive and suicidal inclinations that has desperate to pull him out of the depths of his own pain. 🫂🩶 '‘The wind blows backwards all night long’ remember?' MDH outdid herself in capturing the desire to love someone so fiercely that even at the cost of your own happiness, you have to learn to let go in order to save him. 😢
“How could I explain him? My own feelings were so tangled and confused. Loving him, scared of loving him.”
It was at times frustrating to see Lauren behave, well, like a doormat for Spencer especially when he radiated heat that was sensual, full of longing and desire; but he wooed her and won her heart with his poetic and soft and gentle side that made her all the more determined to pull him back from the destructive thoughts that clouded his sound judgment. 😥 Haunted by dark moods and reckless actions, it feels almost hurtful at how co-dependent their relationship was becoming - his need to rely on her strength and sweet good nature for him to survive.
When he reveals the truth to her, a burden that she carries with she knows she's the only one who understands now why he feels the way he does, it is a heartbreaking decision she has to make. A decision that costs more than either of them expected, but yet, so powerfully convincing in its portrayal, that I was so afraid to just jump ahead to spoil myself for the conclusion.😟
“Don’t hate yourself,” I whispered, “don’t. It’s not your fault, none of it’s your fault.”
But, I refrained and I was rewarded with a lot of honest and emotional growth that was beautiful and heart-wrenching, yet so very real. ❤️🩹 That through the whirlwind of teen angst and romance, I wanted their love to work. I wanted Lauren to find a way to reach Spencer and help him realize how only he could save himself from himself - to find happiness and light in the wake of darkness. That scene on the bridge - 'for the first time, I knew what he’d meant when he said death fascinated him, tempted him' - was gut-wrenching, but eye-awakening to make Lauren become stronger and determined in her assertive stance in making her feelings for him heard, still love him with all her heart. 🥺
It was a poignant and heartbreaking conclusion but one that moved me to tears. 🥹 Yes, I am an emotional reader. It did not gloss over the trauma, nor did it make it an easy journey for the two, but it was hard-earned and rightfully deserved - a happiness that I wished they could have found earlier. But, the challenges they faced, the depth of understanding they learned, it was enough for them to move on from the wind blowing them back - it was behind us, pushing us forward.' And that tender and gentle reminder was enough to show me that it was worth revisiting it after all these years. 🙏🏻
“The wind blows forward too, Spencer. Your whole life is ahead of you, just waiting. School, California, everything.”
~*~*~*~*~
I'd like to say that my yaadein (memories) of it were of my attraction to the broody moody motorcycle hunk that donned the cover. *laughs* Well, it is safe to say that the cover still was very vivid in my memory! 😍 However, it was the scene where Lauren and Spencer shared their first time together that I actually remembered; mainly, because it was my first time reading a book that involved safe sex. 🥺
I know it shouldn't matter, but as a teen Muslim studying in an American school in the early 2000s, it's not something that was widely and openly discussed, aside from a brief mention in Health Class. But, I don't know, that description of the ripping off the foil was something that stayed in my memory, more so than what the book had been really about. 😳
I guess as a young impressionable teen, it was almost a scandalous thing to read. 😅 It's something that stayed with me for so long, that when I re-read it, I was embarrassed at how much in clarity, the scene was very much exactly as I remembered it. 🙈
“I wanted to be his, I wanted to give myself to him. Not just my body. All of me. My whole life—my loneliness, my sadness, my happiness. Everything. There was no going back. Not for me. Not for him.”
[image error]
After my recent rage-re-read of my first ever Mary Downing Hahn book from when I was ten years old, I was a bit wary that my re-read of the book that I read when I was thirteen would have a similar reaction. The instance I read these immortal thoughts of seventeen-year-old senior Lauren at her job as library assistant - 'the aisle was empty. I was alone. Just me and hundreds of books—my idea of paradise' - a sentiment that spoke to my soul, I knew that this reread would be something special. 📚💓
I saw a lot of myself in Lauren and her feelings for Spencer. Being best friends with him throughout their childhood and then harboring an intense secret crush on him in the eighth grade, only for them to go their separate ways in high school without speaking a word to one another - he being Mr. Popular, Prince of Jocks, and she the Mouse who stayed buried in the books and in the shadows - only for a chance re-connection over their love of poetry for their paths to once again cross.
It reminded me of my own lingering feelings for one of my childhood friends and for us to have also parted ways in high school, the object of my unrequited affection never knowing what he meant to me. And yet, our friendship was so deep that if he asked me to break the school rules - he would be the exception to my staunch good-girl persona. Him and only him. 😮💨
“I was taken over by emotions I didn’t understand, couldn’t control.
When he let me go, he whispered, “The loneliness isn’t so bad now.”
In that sense, I did not fault Lauren for the extreme leniency she gave Spencer, for both his emotions and his compulsive, if not uncertain nature. Because when you care for someone deeply enough, you'll do anything for them, even at the risk of your own happiness and well-being. 😔 And just for them to finally notice you again and want to spend time with you - seeing that you're the only one who understands what they're going through - if you're still holding onto those feelings of wanting him - wouldn't it be worth it to hold on just a bit longer?
It was a roller coaster of emotions in which Lauren was reintroduced into Spencer's life, connected over their mothers' benign neglect, and finally saw how much he's deeply hurting over a traumatic past that has affecting him so viscerally that he's grounded himself in dark thoughts - depressive and suicidal inclinations that has desperate to pull him out of the depths of his own pain. 🫂🩶 '‘The wind blows backwards all night long’ remember?' MDH outdid herself in capturing the desire to love someone so fiercely that even at the cost of your own happiness, you have to learn to let go in order to save him. 😢
“How could I explain him? My own feelings were so tangled and confused. Loving him, scared of loving him.”
It was at times frustrating to see Lauren behave, well, like a doormat for Spencer especially when he radiated heat that was sensual, full of longing and desire; but he wooed her and won her heart with his poetic and soft and gentle side that made her all the more determined to pull him back from the destructive thoughts that clouded his sound judgment. 😥 Haunted by dark moods and reckless actions, it feels almost hurtful at how co-dependent their relationship was becoming - his need to rely on her strength and sweet good nature for him to survive.
When he reveals the truth to her, a burden that she carries with she knows she's the only one who understands now why he feels the way he does, it is a heartbreaking decision she has to make. A decision that costs more than either of them expected, but yet, so powerfully convincing in its portrayal, that I was so afraid to just jump ahead to spoil myself for the conclusion.😟
“Don’t hate yourself,” I whispered, “don’t. It’s not your fault, none of it’s your fault.”
But, I refrained and I was rewarded with a lot of honest and emotional growth that was beautiful and heart-wrenching, yet so very real. ❤️🩹 That through the whirlwind of teen angst and romance, I wanted their love to work. I wanted Lauren to find a way to reach Spencer and help him realize how only he could save himself from himself - to find happiness and light in the wake of darkness. That scene on the bridge - 'for the first time, I knew what he’d meant when he said death fascinated him, tempted him' - was gut-wrenching, but eye-awakening to make Lauren become stronger and determined in her assertive stance in making her feelings for him heard, still love him with all her heart. 🥺
It was a poignant and heartbreaking conclusion but one that moved me to tears. 🥹 Yes, I am an emotional reader. It did not gloss over the trauma, nor did it make it an easy journey for the two, but it was hard-earned and rightfully deserved - a happiness that I wished they could have found earlier. But, the challenges they faced, the depth of understanding they learned, it was enough for them to move on from the wind blowing them back - it was behind us, pushing us forward.' And that tender and gentle reminder was enough to show me that it was worth revisiting it after all these years. 🙏🏻
“The wind blows forward too, Spencer. Your whole life is ahead of you, just waiting. School, California, everything.”
~*~*~*~*~
I'd like to say that my yaadein (memories) of it were of my attraction to the broody moody motorcycle hunk that donned the cover. *laughs* Well, it is safe to say that the cover still was very vivid in my memory! 😍 However, it was the scene where Lauren and Spencer shared their first time together that I actually remembered; mainly, because it was my first time reading a book that involved safe sex. 🥺
I know it shouldn't matter, but as a teen Muslim studying in an American school in the early 2000s, it's not something that was widely and openly discussed, aside from a brief mention in Health Class. But, I don't know, that description of the ripping off the foil was something that stayed in my memory, more so than what the book had been really about. 😳
I guess as a young impressionable teen, it was almost a scandalous thing to read. 😅 It's something that stayed with me for so long, that when I re-read it, I was embarrassed at how much in clarity, the scene was very much exactly as I remembered it. 🙈
January 14, 2012
Honestly the only thing I can say is this is, and always will be, my favorite book. I can never get pass the beauty and ingenuity of this book. This book is the equivalent of a gateway drug introducing me to my new life, obsession, and passion.
May 24, 2010
I have no idea why this book, a 20 year old teen read with a dated cover, caught my eye but I'm so glad it did. It is a poignant read that really affected me.
Lauren is a high school senior, the introverted, smart, bookish type. Spencer is a track star, and one of the most popular boys in school. She was in love with him in eighth grade when they used to be best friends. When Spencer's athletic ability moved him up the social ladder in the ninth grade he dropped her.
She's confused about her interest in him, but Spencer has grown up and is tired of his social mask. They re-bond very quickly over their love of books and poetry. Spencer can be himself around Lauren. He can confess his loneliness, darker impulses, past traumas, and anxiety's without being judged.
Lauren loves Spencer but can't save him from himself no matter how hard she tries. I wouldn't classify this as a "romance" even though the love story is the main part of the story. For a teen read, it's very perceptive, layered, and dark.
Lauren is a high school senior, the introverted, smart, bookish type. Spencer is a track star, and one of the most popular boys in school. She was in love with him in eighth grade when they used to be best friends. When Spencer's athletic ability moved him up the social ladder in the ninth grade he dropped her.
She's confused about her interest in him, but Spencer has grown up and is tired of his social mask. They re-bond very quickly over their love of books and poetry. Spencer can be himself around Lauren. He can confess his loneliness, darker impulses, past traumas, and anxiety's without being judged.
Lauren loves Spencer but can't save him from himself no matter how hard she tries. I wouldn't classify this as a "romance" even though the love story is the main part of the story. For a teen read, it's very perceptive, layered, and dark.
August 8, 2008
I was, like, 14 when I read this book. It's not for 14-year-olds. Mary Downing Hahn should stick to kids books. I remember thinking when I read this that it was really dirty. Looking back, it may not have been that dirty. But the main characters where, like, 17 and sexually active... but it was okay because they were totally in love. riiiiiight. Also, I remember that he carried a condom around in his pocket and I thought that was weird. ALSO, if I'd read this when I'd been volunteering at the battered women's shelter I would have recognized their relationship for was it was: completely manipulative and bordering on abusive. Other than that... it was okay.
March 1, 2012
OMG, I read this in 8th grade and LOVED it. It was probably my favorite book as a teen because I related to it so much more than other YA out in the 90s. And the guy on that cover? He still makes me swoon!
February 9, 2008
This book was an eye opening book to me. I can't explain why exactly, but I know that when I read this after renting it from the library I was so engrossed that I waited until the library put it in the book sale they were having and I bought it. I was meant to read and own this book. I read it at least 5 or 6 times in the few years following my original read in high school. I could not believe the freedom the girl received and the fact that they both put themselves out on a limb for each other. He was popular, she was plain and I guess I just felt that I was the same as her. I did not date anyone that was popular and that is not something I want either. I just wanted to feel that kind of emotion from someone. In high school, I don't know if that is possible to experience, but this book was just amazing to me. It helped to move me from Nancy Drew to more adult reads, I go back to the young adult section to read a book that sounds interesting still, but I love all books, so that explains that a bit. I would recommend this to anyone that wants to get a better grip on what teen girls are feeling and concerned about. Just to get back in touch. A fantastic book.
April 9, 2009
I was a huge fan of Mary Downing Hahn's children's books from the time I was in 2nd grade. I discovered this book when I was in 6th grade, and it was definitely the first book I ever read with a more mature, adult mindset and plot. I'm amazed at how many people have said the same thing in their reviews that I feel about what this book did for them.
This book did for me as a young adolescent what another of MDH's books, Wait till Helen Comes did for me as a 7 year old. It opened my eyes to what good authors who really trust and enjoy speaking to their audience can do. These books were so much more than the average "kids" books or "adolescent" books. Things aren't sugar coated, condescending, or oversimplified. These books trust that the age groups they're meant for can handle the content, and the books speak honestly.
I'm sorry, I'm sure this sounds incredibly stupid and sappy, but Mary Downing Hahn's books had a huge effect on my growth as a reader throughout my childhood and my early adolescence, and even if her stories aren't Franz Kafka or Kurt Vonnegut, I want to give them their due.
This book did for me as a young adolescent what another of MDH's books, Wait till Helen Comes did for me as a 7 year old. It opened my eyes to what good authors who really trust and enjoy speaking to their audience can do. These books were so much more than the average "kids" books or "adolescent" books. Things aren't sugar coated, condescending, or oversimplified. These books trust that the age groups they're meant for can handle the content, and the books speak honestly.
I'm sorry, I'm sure this sounds incredibly stupid and sappy, but Mary Downing Hahn's books had a huge effect on my growth as a reader throughout my childhood and my early adolescence, and even if her stories aren't Franz Kafka or Kurt Vonnegut, I want to give them their due.
March 5, 2016
"The Wind Blows Backward" by Mary Downing Hahn came highly recommended and it's one of the best book recommendations I've ever received.
Though it's been published more than twenty years ago and is now out of print, it isn't outdated by any stretch. To the contrary-it seamlessly fits into current times.
Honestly, this is one of the best Young Adult books I've ever read-both in writing style as well as storyline.
Its depth, the beauty of the writing and not to mention two wonderful, multi-dimensional characters have taken an emotional toll on me.
Not only is it really touching, but also carries an important message: We can't save the one we love. They need to save themselves.
"The Wind Blows Backward" is the story of Lauren and Spencer, who have been best friends years ago. Once in high school, Spencer started running with the cool, rich kids and Lauren ceased to exist. But the bond they had survives years of silence and distance, bringing them together when they least expected it.
A beautiful, sweet relationship blooms between them. One that could fulfill all their dreams. They not only share the love for books, art and music, but they truly care for each other. Despite their young age their love feels intense and real.
Unfortunately, just as quickly as it bloomed, it's overshadowed by Spencer's moods. Those are caused by thoughts so dark and gloomy, they scare Lauren and threaten to take Spencer from her.
He can't control the thoughts he has, no matter how hard he tries-even years after the tragic event that caused them.
A young love is tested, when Spencer has to decide if he is strong enough to fight. And Lauren has to learn she can't save him from himself.
Lauren and Spencer's journey is heart-wrenching. The ups and downs they go through felt like a rollercoaster ride. I was entranced by their story. The inherent melancholy took a hold of me, but I didn't consider it a negative thing. It allowed me to feel so much closer to the characters-feeling their pain and joy to the point I cried and my heart ached for both Spencer and Lauren.
They are both hurting, but in different ways.
Lauren used to be timid and shy most of her life - always an outsider, never fully fitting in. She's used to being alone and lonely. But what I liked about her is that she doesn't wallow in self-pity. She is as content as her life allowed and she is always striving for more, trying to create her own destiny. She deserves all the happiness in the world-but finding it with Spencer comes with a catch.
It was fascinating to see her grow. To see her mature quickly-allowing her to see the truth despite her infatuation. She doesn't allow her love to fully consume her. It made her strong and confident-which in turn is the kind of person Spencer needs.
Spencer's character blew me away. Though the book is from Lauren's POV, the author does an incredible job of letting us know who Spencer is and what he feels. And God, the poor guy feels so much-too much. He's broken. Truly broken-but unlike so many other heroes, he doesn't use it as an excuse to drink, sleep around and get into fights. His battle is internal, his biggest enemy his own mind. It threatens to consume him.
His fears feel real and tangible and the toll they took on him broke my heart. Because underneath all that darkness was a sweet, loving, smart and creative boy. One who loved with all his heart.
I get why Lauren was so crazy about him. I would've been too.
The author treated the subject with a lot of sensitivity and respect-keeping the balance between sweet & serious as well as swoonworthy and dark.
She captured the coming of age aspect as well as the issues Spencer and Lauren face perfectly.
This has now become one of my all-time favorites - a book that won't let go of me for a long time to come.
5+ growing-up-is-hard-to-do stars.
Though it's been published more than twenty years ago and is now out of print, it isn't outdated by any stretch. To the contrary-it seamlessly fits into current times.
Honestly, this is one of the best Young Adult books I've ever read-both in writing style as well as storyline.
Its depth, the beauty of the writing and not to mention two wonderful, multi-dimensional characters have taken an emotional toll on me.
Not only is it really touching, but also carries an important message: We can't save the one we love. They need to save themselves.
"The Wind Blows Backward" is the story of Lauren and Spencer, who have been best friends years ago. Once in high school, Spencer started running with the cool, rich kids and Lauren ceased to exist. But the bond they had survives years of silence and distance, bringing them together when they least expected it.
A beautiful, sweet relationship blooms between them. One that could fulfill all their dreams. They not only share the love for books, art and music, but they truly care for each other. Despite their young age their love feels intense and real.
Unfortunately, just as quickly as it bloomed, it's overshadowed by Spencer's moods. Those are caused by thoughts so dark and gloomy, they scare Lauren and threaten to take Spencer from her.
He can't control the thoughts he has, no matter how hard he tries-even years after the tragic event that caused them.
A young love is tested, when Spencer has to decide if he is strong enough to fight. And Lauren has to learn she can't save him from himself.
Lauren and Spencer's journey is heart-wrenching. The ups and downs they go through felt like a rollercoaster ride. I was entranced by their story. The inherent melancholy took a hold of me, but I didn't consider it a negative thing. It allowed me to feel so much closer to the characters-feeling their pain and joy to the point I cried and my heart ached for both Spencer and Lauren.
They are both hurting, but in different ways.
Lauren used to be timid and shy most of her life - always an outsider, never fully fitting in. She's used to being alone and lonely. But what I liked about her is that she doesn't wallow in self-pity. She is as content as her life allowed and she is always striving for more, trying to create her own destiny. She deserves all the happiness in the world-but finding it with Spencer comes with a catch.
It was fascinating to see her grow. To see her mature quickly-allowing her to see the truth despite her infatuation. She doesn't allow her love to fully consume her. It made her strong and confident-which in turn is the kind of person Spencer needs.
Spencer's character blew me away. Though the book is from Lauren's POV, the author does an incredible job of letting us know who Spencer is and what he feels. And God, the poor guy feels so much-too much. He's broken. Truly broken-but unlike so many other heroes, he doesn't use it as an excuse to drink, sleep around and get into fights. His battle is internal, his biggest enemy his own mind. It threatens to consume him.
His fears feel real and tangible and the toll they took on him broke my heart. Because underneath all that darkness was a sweet, loving, smart and creative boy. One who loved with all his heart.
I get why Lauren was so crazy about him. I would've been too.
The author treated the subject with a lot of sensitivity and respect-keeping the balance between sweet & serious as well as swoonworthy and dark.
She captured the coming of age aspect as well as the issues Spencer and Lauren face perfectly.
This has now become one of my all-time favorites - a book that won't let go of me for a long time to come.
5+ growing-up-is-hard-to-do stars.
May 24, 2009
This is actually a great book. I identified with the main character's obsession with books.
It's just this is another book I first read in high school. Ages ago I read it again as an adult and noticed that the relationship in the book is totally unhealthy.
And the main character, she tries her best to stick by it, however, I'd be afraid teenage girls would read this book, get into relationships with troubled young men and think that their loooooooooove can save them.
This isn't the case though. A person in a situation like this can only save themselves if they are aware they have a problem, a problem of depression.
Perhaps it can bring those subjects to people attentions. It's weird to read a book you liked so much as a kid, then see it differently as an adult fearing getting into an unhealthy relationship or one day having a child that ends up in an unhealthy relationship.
It's just this is another book I first read in high school. Ages ago I read it again as an adult and noticed that the relationship in the book is totally unhealthy.
And the main character, she tries her best to stick by it, however, I'd be afraid teenage girls would read this book, get into relationships with troubled young men and think that their loooooooooove can save them.
This isn't the case though. A person in a situation like this can only save themselves if they are aware they have a problem, a problem of depression.
Perhaps it can bring those subjects to people attentions. It's weird to read a book you liked so much as a kid, then see it differently as an adult fearing getting into an unhealthy relationship or one day having a child that ends up in an unhealthy relationship.
July 29, 2009
And people think Edward and Bella are needy and co-dependent? They've got NOTHING on Lauren and Spencer!
August 9, 2016
This was my FAVORITE book as a young teen that I read over and over and over again. I've actually been trying to find it online on and off for years but I couldn't remember the title just lines from the poem the two main characters like to recite and their names too. Finally tonight I found somebody asking the same question online and there was somebody with answer for them: "The Wind Blows Backward". This was a shared favorite with my jr. high school best friend and I, we wore the book out. I remember at the time thinking ohhhh just some romantic story when I had first read the cover but the book is so much more than that. There are universal truths in this book that make it so much deeper than a lot of other YA fiction..or at least that's how I remember how I saw it as a young teen. I can't wait to get my hands on this book again soon. So happy I found it again. :-)
August 28, 2008
As a middle school student, I came to own a copy of this book. After reading and loving it, I promptly passed it to all of my friends. Today, my copy is yellowed, creased, and close to falling apart. I read it again recently, revisiting Lauren and Spencer and their high school romance. While my reading interests have matured, there is still something that plays on the introverted bookworm in me and draws me in, making me want to be Lauren so that I can have a Spencer, too.
June 14, 2011
One of my favorite books that I first read in seventh grade. This was the book that solidified my love of books. I have read this book once a year since and I am now almost 30. Its a book that all teens should read. Has an amzaing storyline and brings to light tough issues for teens. Loved it, Loved it!!
January 20, 2021
My favorite book growing up... Still one of my favorites, actually!
November 1, 2016
To a teenage-girl obsessed with HEAs, there was nothing more appealing than Spencer. I read this book every week for a solid year. And then it was taken away by a teacher and I never got it back.
August 30, 2025
2.5 stars. MDH is best at stories about kids with spooky problems and The Wind Blows Backward is a romance/teens in peril story. I enjoyed reading it through but probably would not revisit this one.
First of all, it’s really about Spencer, and not Lauren, because her entire life is consumed by Spencer when he reenters her life again in their senior year.
It’s a predictable soap opera but keeps you reading. Would have liked Lauren to have some more depth but it’s an Endless Love situation and the romance is the big theme. Twin Peaks-esque.
The hint of future darkness when Spencer jokes about getting another motorcycle is real.
Casey was a good friend.
First of all, it’s really about Spencer, and not Lauren, because her entire life is consumed by Spencer when he reenters her life again in their senior year.
It’s a predictable soap opera but keeps you reading. Would have liked Lauren to have some more depth but it’s an Endless Love situation and the romance is the big theme. Twin Peaks-esque.
The hint of future darkness when Spencer jokes about getting another motorcycle is real.
Casey was a good friend.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 2, 2017
“The Wind Blows Backward,” by Mary Downing Hahn, is about a girl named Lauren and a boy named Spencer who fall in two very different social classes. Lauren and Spencer used to be best friends until Spencer became popular their freshman year and changed completely. He became the “Prince of the Jocks” and stopped talking to Lauren. It wasn’t until their senior year when they bumped into each other, that Spencer wanted her in his life again. It turned out that Spencer’s life wasn’t really as perfect and happy as it seemed. It was a cover, a mask from how he really felt. Lauren fell in love with him all over again, just like she had in middle school. Even though his thoughts and actions weren’t always good, she never stopped loving him and he loved her the same. In the book, Lauren explains how she feels and how their relationship makes her feel. Spencer depends on Lauren to help him deal with his past and problems with depression.
“The Wind Blows Backward” is worth reading. It is well written and is very suspenseful. While I was reading this book, I never wanted to stop. Like all Mary Downing Hahn books that I have read, it is a terrific book with a great story behind it. This book is told from the point of view of Lauren. This story lets you know that even when you might be going through some tough times, there will always be people you can depend on to help you feel better.
“The Wind Blows Backward” is worth reading. It is well written and is very suspenseful. While I was reading this book, I never wanted to stop. Like all Mary Downing Hahn books that I have read, it is a terrific book with a great story behind it. This book is told from the point of view of Lauren. This story lets you know that even when you might be going through some tough times, there will always be people you can depend on to help you feel better.
August 29, 2013
The angst. Good god the angst.
Oh, don’t get me wrong — I can see what this would be such an appealing book for young teenagers: that same angst, and the ‘bad boy’ in need of saving, and that the characters have sex... A classmate recommended this to me when I was twelve or thirteen, and the What's the Name of That Book? group recently found it for me again. I remember very little of what I thought of the book then, but I remember that my classmate — who was, like me, bookish and introverted — had loved it.
So back I went to reread it, and...well. ANGST. Angstangstangst. Lauren is angsty because she’s bookish and introverted and Spencer hasn’t talked to her in four years but he’s her everything. Spencer is angsty because he’s traumatised and clinically depressed and the only person who can possibly understand or save him is the girl he’s ignored for four years. Lauren’s mother is angsty because none of her relationships have stuck...
I’m not actually anti-angst (I mean, I was an angsty teenager once), though I do wish Lauren were not quite so much a doormat. I’m not exaggerating about the four years of ignoring, but she falls over herself to please him anyway. Oh, it’s nothing new or unusual (in fiction or real life) — but she neither has a spine nor grows one, and that’s a pity. The bulk of the book’s tension is given over to Spencer’s depression, and any development on Lauren’s end takes a backseat. (Mind, the book’s adults are fairly lethargic too — for example, Spencer has gone from golden boy to lazeabout in a matter of months, and his teachers have completely written him off.)
All that being said, the appeal of the book can be summed up fairly easily: troubled loverboy. Sex. Motorcycle. Angst.
Oh, don’t get me wrong — I can see what this would be such an appealing book for young teenagers: that same angst, and the ‘bad boy’ in need of saving, and that the characters have sex... A classmate recommended this to me when I was twelve or thirteen, and the What's the Name of That Book? group recently found it for me again. I remember very little of what I thought of the book then, but I remember that my classmate — who was, like me, bookish and introverted — had loved it.
So back I went to reread it, and...well. ANGST. Angstangstangst. Lauren is angsty because she’s bookish and introverted and Spencer hasn’t talked to her in four years but he’s her everything. Spencer is angsty because he’s traumatised and clinically depressed and the only person who can possibly understand or save him is the girl he’s ignored for four years. Lauren’s mother is angsty because none of her relationships have stuck...
I’m not actually anti-angst (I mean, I was an angsty teenager once), though I do wish Lauren were not quite so much a doormat. I’m not exaggerating about the four years of ignoring, but she falls over herself to please him anyway. Oh, it’s nothing new or unusual (in fiction or real life) — but she neither has a spine nor grows one, and that’s a pity. The bulk of the book’s tension is given over to Spencer’s depression, and any development on Lauren’s end takes a backseat. (Mind, the book’s adults are fairly lethargic too — for example, Spencer has gone from golden boy to lazeabout in a matter of months, and his teachers have completely written him off.)
All that being said, the appeal of the book can be summed up fairly easily: troubled loverboy. Sex. Motorcycle. Angst.
January 31, 2012
I seriously used to read and reread this book like once a week when I was twelve. MDH was my absolute favorite author back in the day, and I remember once I wrote her a letter when I was about 8 (and reading her middle grade stuff), and she wrote back to me the nicest handwritten note and the recommendation to read this one when I was older. This book is so romantic, dramatic, terrifying, and sad, and wins bonus points for making me interested in nineteenth century poetry at a time when my main interests were Danielle Steel and Married with Children.
Now that I read it as an adult, however, I have a different perspective on the issues that the books bring up. None of the adults in the book attempt to intervene on Spencer's behalf, which was so depressing to me. Counselors, teachers, parents, friends' parents--they all sort of acknowledge that the kid is seriously troubled and yet do nothing to root out the reason or make sure that he doesn't cause harm to himself or others. That seems so irresponsible to me that I actually got sort of distracted from the romance of the last half of the book. I was also angry on Lauren's behalf, because she has to manage her boyfriend's mental illness on her own. She doesn't ever give Spencer any grief for how manipulative their dynamic is and how his mood swings basically dictate her life for the nine months in which the book takes place, as well as ostensibly all through their implied future together (though by the end he is seeing a therapist and has done some of the work to heal, so hopefully it all works out in a healthy way :-)).
Now that I read it as an adult, however, I have a different perspective on the issues that the books bring up. None of the adults in the book attempt to intervene on Spencer's behalf, which was so depressing to me. Counselors, teachers, parents, friends' parents--they all sort of acknowledge that the kid is seriously troubled and yet do nothing to root out the reason or make sure that he doesn't cause harm to himself or others. That seems so irresponsible to me that I actually got sort of distracted from the romance of the last half of the book. I was also angry on Lauren's behalf, because she has to manage her boyfriend's mental illness on her own. She doesn't ever give Spencer any grief for how manipulative their dynamic is and how his mood swings basically dictate her life for the nine months in which the book takes place, as well as ostensibly all through their implied future together (though by the end he is seeing a therapist and has done some of the work to heal, so hopefully it all works out in a healthy way :-)).
February 3, 2009
My copy of this book is missing pages. The cover had come off, so I rubber banded the whole thing together. I have loved this book since I was allowed to choose from the Junior High library shelves in 5th grade (I had read all of the books in my grade's section). Such a good book. A bit intense for the younger crowds, but still so good.
January 13, 2010
There isn't anything that I can add that hasn't already been said time and time again in almost every review. I read this book in junior high, renting it from the library so many times that I convinced the librarian that I lost it just so I could pay to keep it! And I still own that copy - and another "just in case."
May 11, 2009
I loved this book so much. I dont know why. Some of it you read you sat and thought, "yeah ok, like that would happen", but other parts you were like "wow, I can understand that, it happened to me". Even now that Im older, I still love this book and can read it over and over again
November 4, 2010
I loved this book! My friend just randomly grabbed it off a shelf without looking at it and I finished it within 12 hours. I just couldn't put it down. It really related to what's going on in my life and I would reread it again any day!
September 4, 2014
Read this when I was a little younger and loved it.
July 26, 2015
This came out in 1993 and changed my life as a reader. I loved it and must have read it 10 times. Coming back to this as an adult, it still holds up. I still love it.
May 5, 2018
Not an abusive relationship but not a healthy one either.
EDIT: Although, I might cite some instances where it may be abusive because the mc doesn't seem to have agency.
If you like drama combined with high school tropes (think One Tree Hill and Dawson Creek), you might like this one.
***Full review to come in my book blog.
ALSO, I MADE A PLAYLIST FOR THIS BOOK. Apparently, it's my thing now. For other bookish playlists, click here for my spotify.
EDIT: Although, I might cite some instances where it may be abusive because the mc doesn't seem to have agency.
If you like drama combined with high school tropes (think One Tree Hill and Dawson Creek), you might like this one.
***Full review to come in my book blog.
ALSO, I MADE A PLAYLIST FOR THIS BOOK. Apparently, it's my thing now. For other bookish playlists, click here for my spotify.
September 6, 2015
I've actually read this book a ridiculous number of times. But as of today (Sept 2015), I think I can officially give away my copy and declare myself done.
To this book's credit, it's a pretty accurate portrayal of what it's like to love someone with severe depression and suicidal idealization. On the other hand... it's TOO accurate a portrayal of both those things to really scratch my id-itch. The premise has a lot of promise: bookish, nerdy girl reunites with her middle school love, who abandoned her in high school for popularity only to realize in their last year how OH SO WRONG that was. Great, right? Really settles you in for a good, if self-indulgent, read.
Except Hahn takes a sharp turn into grim realism, whether she's fully aware of it or not. When Spencer is up, he is UP, the perfect boyfriend who kisses and cuddles and quotes endless reams of poetry from memory, claiming Lauren is the only worthwhile person in his life. When he's down, however, no one else feels pain like him, no one suffers like he does, and no one can really understand him -- so Lauren is forced to chase him 'round and 'round and give him whatever will make him happy again.
I've never been fully happy with this book, even as a feckless teenager -- I thought a book told from Lauren's POV would be about, uh, Lauren, but what did I know -- and the older I grow, the grimmer it gets with each curious re-read. Maybe Spencer isn't a complete user and a douchebag; maybe Lauren isn't a total wet blanket. Maybe Spencer's problems are real problems: chronic depression, genuine psychological trauma, deep shame and anger tangled together in a ball of self-destruction. Maybe Lauren does have a life and interests outside of her boyfriend, they just get pushed aside and/or subsumed in the maelstrom of Spencer's overwhelming neediness. But in the end they are teenagers who are shockingly ill-equipped to deal with the circumstances. (And Lauren has her own emotional baggage, of course! She becomes "the stable one" because Spencer dismisses her problems as nothing compared to his own, but that's PART OF THEIR PROBLEM.) Their codependency might have read as romantic, or at least interesting, in the right context, but like I said Hahn strays too far into realism for the book's own good. When the book itself acknowledges the deep and disturbing consequences when someone with Spencer's issues goes professionally untreated, it's hard to feel quite comfortable with the idea that all these crazy kids need in the end is each other.
I admire the effort and genuine emotion Hahn put into this book. But I can't help hoping that in the imaginary future of these characters' lives, they break up. That way Spencer can become wedded to therapy, and Lauren can stop repeating her own mother's history and find a lover who enriches her life instead of replacing it.
To this book's credit, it's a pretty accurate portrayal of what it's like to love someone with severe depression and suicidal idealization. On the other hand... it's TOO accurate a portrayal of both those things to really scratch my id-itch. The premise has a lot of promise: bookish, nerdy girl reunites with her middle school love, who abandoned her in high school for popularity only to realize in their last year how OH SO WRONG that was. Great, right? Really settles you in for a good, if self-indulgent, read.
Except Hahn takes a sharp turn into grim realism, whether she's fully aware of it or not. When Spencer is up, he is UP, the perfect boyfriend who kisses and cuddles and quotes endless reams of poetry from memory, claiming Lauren is the only worthwhile person in his life. When he's down, however, no one else feels pain like him, no one suffers like he does, and no one can really understand him -- so Lauren is forced to chase him 'round and 'round and give him whatever will make him happy again.
I've never been fully happy with this book, even as a feckless teenager -- I thought a book told from Lauren's POV would be about, uh, Lauren, but what did I know -- and the older I grow, the grimmer it gets with each curious re-read. Maybe Spencer isn't a complete user and a douchebag; maybe Lauren isn't a total wet blanket. Maybe Spencer's problems are real problems: chronic depression, genuine psychological trauma, deep shame and anger tangled together in a ball of self-destruction. Maybe Lauren does have a life and interests outside of her boyfriend, they just get pushed aside and/or subsumed in the maelstrom of Spencer's overwhelming neediness. But in the end they are teenagers who are shockingly ill-equipped to deal with the circumstances. (And Lauren has her own emotional baggage, of course! She becomes "the stable one" because Spencer dismisses her problems as nothing compared to his own, but that's PART OF THEIR PROBLEM.) Their codependency might have read as romantic, or at least interesting, in the right context, but like I said Hahn strays too far into realism for the book's own good. When the book itself acknowledges the deep and disturbing consequences when someone with Spencer's issues goes professionally untreated, it's hard to feel quite comfortable with the idea that all these crazy kids need in the end is each other.
I admire the effort and genuine emotion Hahn put into this book. But I can't help hoping that in the imaginary future of these characters' lives, they break up. That way Spencer can become wedded to therapy, and Lauren can stop repeating her own mother's history and find a lover who enriches her life instead of replacing it.
July 27, 2014
Okay so I have read this book before when i was in sixth grade and it's been stuck in my head ever since. I absolutely love this book. I love the cliche love story and the high school drama that Mary Hahn put is this book. I'm a hopeless romantic so I really enjoyed this book. It's like most high school romance books. The jock finally notices the lonely girl or the most popular girl in high school finally realizes lonely boy. The main characters had a thing before you could say and they have always liked each other it's just that one was accepted into high school royalty and the other was not. It's a great read, it's funny, romantic, awkward and enjoyable. It's a great book for any teenager that wants to read a good book. Teens can relate to it by experience because were all in high school. I really enjoyed reading it and I wouldn't mind reading this book over and over again. The only thing I did not like about the book was death scare. When I read a book I love them to be cheery and fun, full of life. Like I said before I am a hopeless romantic and I always want their to be a happily ever after with no worries. Other than that Mary Hahn did an amazing job with the book it was cute and romantic and she did a good job when it came to the high school bullying and teasing. It was a great read and I hope everyone that reads it enjoys Mary Hahns amazing book. Happy reading!
April 27, 2012
Hum...Goodreads doesn't have a lot to say about this one, does it? Most people rate it 4-5 stars, and I admit I was once a great lover of this book. When it was first published, I was around Lauren's age. Now, I'm a year younger than her mom. Really puts things into perspective. I had my own copy for over a decade, but traded it on Paperback Swap a few years ago. I saw this tattered copy when I was browsing the library shelves last week, and was flooded with a tidal wave of book nostalgia. I had to check it out, and see if it was as good as I remembered.
Shy, bookish Lauren and Spencer were best friends in junior high. When they entered high school however, Spencer morphed into a jock and Lauren was left behind. By their senior year, Spencer is the school prince and Lauren is nicknamed "Mouse" by the popular kids. But Spencer is once again drawn to Lauren, and it isn't long before the past is forgotten and they rekindle their friendship. Friendship turns to love and lust pretty quickly, and Lauren and Spencer become all Bella and Edward: unable to be apart. There's a part of Spencer Lauren is unable ot reach: he's often moody, reckless and self-destructive. It only takes one especially reckless moment for Lauren to realize loving Spencer in't enough to save him from himself.
Shy, bookish Lauren and Spencer were best friends in junior high. When they entered high school however, Spencer morphed into a jock and Lauren was left behind. By their senior year, Spencer is the school prince and Lauren is nicknamed "Mouse" by the popular kids. But Spencer is once again drawn to Lauren, and it isn't long before the past is forgotten and they rekindle their friendship. Friendship turns to love and lust pretty quickly, and Lauren and Spencer become all Bella and Edward: unable to be apart. There's a part of Spencer Lauren is unable ot reach: he's often moody, reckless and self-destructive. It only takes one especially reckless moment for Lauren to realize loving Spencer in't enough to save him from himself.
December 8, 2020
I love this book since the characters felt so real that I could almost touch them, and the imagery was beautiful with the way the author wrote her words so vividly. This book is now one of my favorites and now definitely added to my "favorite" collection. And more thing: Spencer were art thou? Seriously! Even with his moody and mess of a life, I still greatly cared for him, but of course, I am glad that he has Lauren to accompany him in his dark, passive life.
Lauren and Spencer were best friends in middle school, but when entering high school, their friendship dissolves into dust when Spencer was climbing the social ladder in school. As in joining sports, being the typical jock, getting good grades, being in the honor all. All that he did to please his parents from his past. But when senior year came, Spencer grew tired of his facade and let almost everything go to waste until he re-counter Lauren.
I greatly enjoyed this book that, even at times, it left me breathless from holding my breath for too long, and I didn't even notice what I was doing! I recommend this book to everyone to read at least once in their lifetime!
Lauren and Spencer were best friends in middle school, but when entering high school, their friendship dissolves into dust when Spencer was climbing the social ladder in school. As in joining sports, being the typical jock, getting good grades, being in the honor all. All that he did to please his parents from his past. But when senior year came, Spencer grew tired of his facade and let almost everything go to waste until he re-counter Lauren.
I greatly enjoyed this book that, even at times, it left me breathless from holding my breath for too long, and I didn't even notice what I was doing! I recommend this book to everyone to read at least once in their lifetime!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 161 reviews