Quicksand: One woman's escape from the husband who stalked her, a true story

by Ellen Singer

Ellen Singer (a pseudonym) met her husband, Roger, when she was 17. She fled him when she was 34 and finally disappeared for good with her daughters at 40, saying an unspoken goodbye to "family, friends, steady employment, credit cards and video rentals." After six years of pleading and demanding that the governments of two countries (Canada and the U.S.), three states, and one province "protect my family from a cyber-savvy stalker with the money to hire a reputed hit man, I was left with one simple choice: kill Roger or disappear."

Since June of 1997, Singer and her daughters have remained successfully hidden, in poverty and under assumed names, somewhere in North America. A tangled but peaceful web of white lies and evasive strategies keeps their whereabouts off the official record--and hopefully out of sight of the man who abused and stalked them. Quicksand is the account of how they got to this point. Singer's story demonstrates how spousal abuse--both psychological and physical--is not merely the province of the poor and uneducated, and how it can cripple the confidence and the will of any woman, regardless of class, race, or educational achievement. This vivid and personal testimony explains why women stay in abusive relationships, and how law enforcement and the legal system often betray victims and their children. Singer, a former journalist, freely admits that rage fuels her story. "I will project my voice with passionate fury in honor of the abused women who were killed before their stories could be told," she writes from forced anonymity, "and in the hope that other women might hear me and live." --Svenja Soldovieri

259 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2001

Reviews

[Carla Howatt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not an easy ready but a necessary read for anyone who has ever said an abused woman should just leave her husband and the problem would be solved.

[Jennifer Benstead · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hi

I recently found a book at the library called Quicksand , the Ellen Singer true story.


I don't know if it's possible to pass a message to the author or not.
But I just wanted to tell the author how much I greatly appreciate her writing this book

I am going through a similar situation as she did in the book. My stalker Hayley Nicole Miller has been making my life hell for 3 years. I have filed police reports, talked to detectives. I've gone through a lot of the same stuff as the author. Her insights, Perseverance and determination are inspiring to me.
This book is giving me hope that I can survive the situation and have a chance at a better future.

I just wanted to say thank you to the author for giving us this incredible book

Jennifer

[Barbara Sissel · Rating 5 out of 5]

An intense, compelling, heart wrenching and ultimately uplifting memoir of a woman's escape from a psychopath. While it was difficult to read, a lot because of law enforcement's failure to protect this family, it was so well-written and intense that often I had to remind myself I wasn't reading a thriller but a memoir.

[Michelle Hanson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book makes you think.. definitely opened my eyes to why some women stay in a bad relationship..

[Rachel Marie · Rating 4 out of 5]

With a witty imagination and persistence to reaching beyond odds of survival, this author portrays how real life can be for those who experience the scars of abuse. This note was written at the time I read the book likely ten years ago now, but has left an impression that still reverberates with me to this day.