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Husbandry: Sex, Love & Dirty Laundry--Inside the Minds of Married Men
Why do men hog the remote? Refuse to stop and ask for directions? Have such a hard time sharing their emotions? Why can’t they drop their socks in the laundry basket instead of near it? What does a man mean when he says “uh-huh”? (No, it doesn’t always mean he’s not listening.)
In his wickedly observant collection of essays, Stephen Fried, widely praised as an investigative journalist, turns his attention to the subject of marriage–his own and others’. The result is a daring, provocative, often hilarious read that throws incisive light on mysteries that have long plagued the inner workings of the male mind.
Originally published as a series of popular columns in Ladies’ Home Journal—and now compiled in one volume at the request of his enthusiastic readers—Fried’s pitch-perfect essays fearlessly tackle the realities of love, sex, and marriage with both wit and tenderness. Drawing from candid conversations with fellow husbands as well as with his own wife, Fried’s eye-opening work will surprise, disarm, entertain—and tell you more about the man in your life than you could ever learn by asking him.
In his wickedly observant collection of essays, Stephen Fried, widely praised as an investigative journalist, turns his attention to the subject of marriage–his own and others’. The result is a daring, provocative, often hilarious read that throws incisive light on mysteries that have long plagued the inner workings of the male mind.
Originally published as a series of popular columns in Ladies’ Home Journal—and now compiled in one volume at the request of his enthusiastic readers—Fried’s pitch-perfect essays fearlessly tackle the realities of love, sex, and marriage with both wit and tenderness. Drawing from candid conversations with fellow husbands as well as with his own wife, Fried’s eye-opening work will surprise, disarm, entertain—and tell you more about the man in your life than you could ever learn by asking him.
192 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2007
2 people are currently reading
66 people want to read
About the author
Stephen Fried
23 books87 followersStephen Fried is an award-winning journalist and New York Times bestselling author who teaches at Columbia University and the University of Pennsylvania.
His latest books are RUSH: Revolution, Madness and Benjamin Rush, the Visionary Doctor Who Became a Founding Father (Crown) and Profiles in Mental Health Courage (Dutton) by Patrick Kennedy & Stephen Fried.
He has written six other acclaimed nonfiction books, including the biographies Appetite for America: Fred Harvey and the Business of Civilizing the Wild West—One Meal at a Time and Thing of Beauty: The Tragedy of Supermodel Gia; and the mental health memoir A Common Struggle, co-authored with Congressman Patrick Kennedy. Fried also wrote the investigative books Bitter Pills: Inside the Hazardous World of Legal Drugs and The New Rabbi, as well as a collection of essays on marriage, Husbandry.
A two-time winner of the National Magazine Award, he has written frequently for Vanity Fair, GQ, The Washington Post Magazine, Smithsonian, Rolling Stone, Glamour, and Philadelphia Magazine.
Fried lectures widely on the subjects of his books and magazine articles, and does editorial consulting. He lives in Philadelphia with his wife, author Diane Ayres.
FB author page: https://www.facebook.com/Stephen-Frie...
His latest books are RUSH: Revolution, Madness and Benjamin Rush, the Visionary Doctor Who Became a Founding Father (Crown) and Profiles in Mental Health Courage (Dutton) by Patrick Kennedy & Stephen Fried.
He has written six other acclaimed nonfiction books, including the biographies Appetite for America: Fred Harvey and the Business of Civilizing the Wild West—One Meal at a Time and Thing of Beauty: The Tragedy of Supermodel Gia; and the mental health memoir A Common Struggle, co-authored with Congressman Patrick Kennedy. Fried also wrote the investigative books Bitter Pills: Inside the Hazardous World of Legal Drugs and The New Rabbi, as well as a collection of essays on marriage, Husbandry.
A two-time winner of the National Magazine Award, he has written frequently for Vanity Fair, GQ, The Washington Post Magazine, Smithsonian, Rolling Stone, Glamour, and Philadelphia Magazine.
Fried lectures widely on the subjects of his books and magazine articles, and does editorial consulting. He lives in Philadelphia with his wife, author Diane Ayres.
FB author page: https://www.facebook.com/Stephen-Frie...
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Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews
July 21, 2008
What a waste of a few hours! I suppose I could have just stopped reading it, but it was better than cleaning the toilet!
High points ~
I liked his schtick about sorting out family visits and holidays between both sides of the family. He describes his family as being the center of the galaxy...they sucked other people into their obrbit...then he realized that his wife's family also saw itself at the center of the galaxy and expected to absorb him....family tug of war ensues....yada, yada, ya.
I learned that a psychological researcher from the University of Washington suspects that the main problem in marital communication isnt that husbands dont listen, its that they actively resist being influenced by their wive's words in order to maintain their "manly power". I agree. ;)
I liked his explanation of a man's midlife crisis...that after decades of not thinking much at all, they begin to think too much. All of the new found thoughts cause them to wallow in their past disappointments instead of thinking towards a more fulfilling future...interesting
Low points ~
This guy cannot stop complaining about his weight! Has has apparently had weight/body issues his whole life and is a "dieter"...you know that person who is always dieting and cannot shut up about it?!
Okay, he goes on and on about dieting and his big boobs, and then shares that he no longer wears a towel in the (social scene) locker room..EWWWWWW I do not need that image of his fat, sweaty, big booby self talking to other old dudes naked!!!!
He has an entire 4 1/2 page chapter explaining why women should forgive men for "tracking" (checking out other women as they walk by). He claims that it's just a short attention span, no hard feelings. He compares it to channel surfing. (Isnt channel surfing constantly looking out for something better?!)
His advice is not so great because he is the woman in his relationship. He says it himself. (page 152) He is the jealous one, he is the social organzier. He is the dieter, and this dude wrote a regular column in ladies home journal for peter, paul and mary's sake! He also gives a shout out in the end to his special lady-friend editors over at Glamour magazine.....
oy
High points ~
I liked his schtick about sorting out family visits and holidays between both sides of the family. He describes his family as being the center of the galaxy...they sucked other people into their obrbit...then he realized that his wife's family also saw itself at the center of the galaxy and expected to absorb him....family tug of war ensues....yada, yada, ya.
I learned that a psychological researcher from the University of Washington suspects that the main problem in marital communication isnt that husbands dont listen, its that they actively resist being influenced by their wive's words in order to maintain their "manly power". I agree. ;)
I liked his explanation of a man's midlife crisis...that after decades of not thinking much at all, they begin to think too much. All of the new found thoughts cause them to wallow in their past disappointments instead of thinking towards a more fulfilling future...interesting
Low points ~
This guy cannot stop complaining about his weight! Has has apparently had weight/body issues his whole life and is a "dieter"...you know that person who is always dieting and cannot shut up about it?!
Okay, he goes on and on about dieting and his big boobs, and then shares that he no longer wears a towel in the (social scene) locker room..EWWWWWW I do not need that image of his fat, sweaty, big booby self talking to other old dudes naked!!!!
He has an entire 4 1/2 page chapter explaining why women should forgive men for "tracking" (checking out other women as they walk by). He claims that it's just a short attention span, no hard feelings. He compares it to channel surfing. (Isnt channel surfing constantly looking out for something better?!)
His advice is not so great because he is the woman in his relationship. He says it himself. (page 152) He is the jealous one, he is the social organzier. He is the dieter, and this dude wrote a regular column in ladies home journal for peter, paul and mary's sake! He also gives a shout out in the end to his special lady-friend editors over at Glamour magazine.....
oy
March 22, 2009
So my husband bought this for me for my birthday; out of respect that he appreciated my love of books, I had to give it a go. Unfortunately, it was a no-go. There was very little I related to, perhaps because I am 20 years younger; but the older the wiser philosophy did not hold. I have not updated recently for fail that I could not get through the meager pages of husbandry wisdom. I would not recommend reading this book. The author does seem to love and respect his wife; and if it works for him-go at it man. But if I can't even finish a book of 173 pages, big text in a week's time, then it barely makes a star.
August 25, 2008
Funny insider's view to the way our husbands think. I enjoyed it.
January 2, 2009
The topics discussed were interesting, and often seemed to be true for myself and my husband. However, I wish the author had taken the topics to a new level and provided more detail. Just as he'd get into something interesting, it was off to another topic. And each chapter was a completely different topic, which caused a lack of flow that was hard to get used to.
I did appreciate the discussion of encouraging your spouse (and vice versa) to develop a love of spending time with yourself. As a working mom, I often spend those precious moments to myself in a struggle between getting things done and "relaxing". It's a balance I'm trying to work on. And thinking of how I can help my husband feel comfortable with that time is interesting - it means I shouldn't get as upset when he wants to go golfing. Interesting and probably not something I'm quite capable of yet ;)
I did appreciate the discussion of encouraging your spouse (and vice versa) to develop a love of spending time with yourself. As a working mom, I often spend those precious moments to myself in a struggle between getting things done and "relaxing". It's a balance I'm trying to work on. And thinking of how I can help my husband feel comfortable with that time is interesting - it means I shouldn't get as upset when he wants to go golfing. Interesting and probably not something I'm quite capable of yet ;)
December 12, 2009
I guess, as a not-man, I can't know for sure how accurate or universal these pieces are, but it felt realistic enough. And it was fun to read, if insubstantial. These were originally magazine columns, and probably didn't go over two pages. Much like reading one of the many blogs turned into books. Since the original magazine was Ladies' Home Journal, the pieces stay cleaner than usual works on this genre, which are mostly by stand-up comics. I didn't mind that at all. I'm interested in taking notes on how other couples divvy up household chores, but I don't want details on their sex lives. He did a more balanced job than most at making both members of the marriage sound like generally competent, reasonable people. The rationalization of jealousy was a little creepy, and the female reluctance to learn technology is really just a Boomer and older thing, but most of the rest rang pretty true.
November 30, 2017
Generally meh. Short essays on marital issues from a decidedly lighthearted stance- wish he would have gone deeper into the issues of splitting work, jealousy, sex, friends, personal interests, etc... He plays the stereotypical husband who doesn't do chores, which is old, but it has its moments.
11/29/17 addendum: I’m reading Fried’s book Appetite for America about Fred Harvey and it is Excellent!
11/29/17 addendum: I’m reading Fried’s book Appetite for America about Fred Harvey and it is Excellent!
October 2, 2008
Bret and I picked this up yesterday - looks like "chick lit" for men. The back cover is hysterical.
ETA - this looked like chickit for men...but is really a collection of essays a man wrote for a woman's magazine. Interesting and a quick read - but not a novel.
ETA - this looked like chickit for men...but is really a collection of essays a man wrote for a woman's magazine. Interesting and a quick read - but not a novel.
June 4, 2009
This book made me laugh out loud too many times to count!! I felt like Stephen had spied on me and my husband and then wrote a book about us!! HILARIOUS! I've already told all of my friends about it -- and it was a quick read too!
October 6, 2009
This was a cute book. I really liked how Stephen Fried spoke so lovingly about his wife. There were some great stories. I am just a newly wed, so I know we have a lot to learn! It's fun to see how other couples relate in humorous ways.
August 12, 2009
this book was really funny, i have had just about every one of these fights with my husband! It's interesting to see what it is men are thinking while we're yelling at them about their lack of ability to get their socks into the laudry basket! A must read for all wives!
July 5, 2014
This collection of essays was a nice, easy read. I enjoyed reading about marriage from a man's point of view. While there was definitely humor in the stories, the collection's strength lies in it's sweet nature.
February 23, 2008
Cute bits for those suffering from domestic partnership.
March 6, 2008
I couldn't relate to the husband issues in this book, like leaving dirty socks outside of the laundry basket. I guess my husband isn't as big of a jerk as I thought he was.
April 5, 2008
Life-changing
March 8, 2009
Not worth the $8.95!!
April 9, 2009
Wonderfully written--and very funny! Gave me insight into the very real differences between a man and a woman. A must read for any couple, but really enjoyed by a present day divorcee, like me.
August 20, 2009
much fun! easy read!
November 21, 2009
funny funny insight to a man's mind
February 25, 2012
This book is awful. It's just a load of anecdotal crap that's supposed to be cute and funny with the rare sentence or two referencing some study.
March 24, 2013
A little funny and entertaining. Not a waste of time, but I would have been fine never reading it.
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July 22, 2015Muška posla: seks, ljubav i prljavo rublje
January 9, 2022
This book is very funny; I laughed out loud. It is filled with keen observations about domestic life, but best of all, the author manages to tell humorous stories NOT at his wife's expense. He obviously loves her dearly and is very respectful toward her. Nonetheless, this is a really enjoyable read.
December 10, 2018
Nice, light read. Funny in the relate-ability of it all as a married woman.
April 14, 2019
A funny, light-hearted read.
January 16, 2016
An interesting, if not very profound, look at marriage from the man's perspective. Laughed out loud a few times.
October 19, 2010
Certainly not a book you feel smarter after reading, but funny nonetheless.
April 2, 2017
not very insightful but a cute and entertaining read
Displaying 1 - 27 of 27 reviews