Beautiful (Carole King), Beautiful (Christina Aguilera), Scars to Your Beautiful(Alessia Cara), are songs that came into my mind when reading different parts of this book. Weird huh? This book hit every emotion and note inside my mind, heart, spirit and soul. It took me days to read this story and hours after completion to put any thoughts down. How do you say you love a book that has such atrocities running throughout almost every page without sounding like someone twisted? Let me explain, I don’t like what was happening. I don’t like the atrocities. I don’t like most of the characters. All these elements made me uneasy, uncomfortable, horrified, and teary eyed. However, it was these responses in myself that made me encouraged. Yup, encouraged! Encouraged because someone was bringing a much needed current situation to the forefront. These crimes and monstrosities are happening everyday right in front of us and many of us go around unaware of what is occurring until we are confronted by it. So to the author I say well done. Thank you for being so brave to put yourself out there. I can’t imagine the internal pain that you must have gone through.
Onto trying to explain my very first sentence. I live in my own world of hope and being a product of your environment. So although, Yury seems abominable, he is a result of his environment. If you never learn right from wrong, if you never experience a mother’s love, if you never experience any love than you are what you are taught. He was raised in a bubble of brutality, abuse and transgressions. This is so hard to write because of all the heinous things he did. In a court of law I would definitely convict him. However, seeing parts of him coming to life was beautiful. Seeing people teaching him or explaining love true love beyond self was amazing. I would love to write the parts that really got to me in a good way but if you can handle it you need to experience this story for yourself. It is truly not for the faint of heart. I had one of each of the above songs for different characters in this book, even for Yury. This book surely depicts the saying out of something bad comes something good. Think of it as birth. During birth women experience horrific pain, sweat, hours of saying never again but from it comes someone beautiful and innocent. We love unconditionally at that point and would sacrifice our own lives for the little bundle of joy. The same is said when someone, no matter how old, evolves, learns the meaning of true love. The lesson doesn't come without pain, effort and a cost. Seeing someone trying to redeem themselves is beautiful. They’re scars become beautiful. It’s the cost they’ve paid wether outward or internal.
Did I fall in love with Valerie,Wolf, Fire, and Crash? You bet your butt I did! I even felt compassion for Kirill and Adrian. There is a saying that says, “ There’s no free lunch”. At one time or another we all pay. Karma baby, it’s real. At least in my world it is. However, it’s the real ending of your story that matters. Have to say I love the way India weaved others from a different series into her story. I was deeply moved. Bravo, India for confusing me (with my own thoughts. How can I feel empathy?), breaking me down, building it back up and putting my heart back together again. She is truly THE MASTER of bringing it all home! Thank you for getting up every morning and showing us all the love in your heart. You are beautiful. You’re beautiful as you feel!