The Stepping Off Place

The Stepping Off Place #1

by Cameron Kelly Rosenblum

From debut author Cameron Kelly Rosenblum comes a stunning teen novel that tackles love, grief, and mental health as one girl must process her friend’s death and ultimately learn how to stand in her own light. Perfect for fans of All the Bright Places and We Were Liars.

It’s the summer before senior year. Reid is in the thick of Scofield High’s in-crowd thanks to her best friend, Hattie, who has been her social oxygen since middle school. But summer is when Hattie goes to her family’s Maine island home. Instead of sitting inside for eight weeks, waiting for her to return, Reid and their friend, Sam, enter into a pact—to live it up, one party at a time. But days before Hattie is due home, Reid finds out the shocking news that Hattie has died by suicide.

Driven by a desperate need to understand what went wrong, Reid searches for answers. In doing so, she uncovers painful secrets about the person she thought she knew better than herself. And the truth will force Reid to reexamine everything.

Genres: Young Adult, Contemporary, Mental Health, Realistic Fiction, Mystery, Fiction, Audiobook

480 pages, Hardcover

First published July 28, 2020

Reviews

[Melissa ♥ Dog/Wolf Lover ♥ Martin · Rating 2 out of 5]

I thought I would love this book but I just didn’t. I love how the hardback looks. I love the dust jacket with the beautiful colors and trees! It would look so pretty on my shelf!!! But, alas, I’m going to trade it in.

I mean I have bipolar depression with suicidal tendencies and other things so I thought this might go deep for me. Oh well, I didn’t really like the characters that much either so there’s that too. I really wish I did.

Mel 🖤🐶🐺🐾

[Ashley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Star Rating: —> 4.5 Stars

TW: suicide (not on page), mental illness, grief, loss

This book was absolutely, devastatingly sad. But… I can’t give it less stars because it made me sob, or made me uncomfortable, or made me sob even more, or that it hits so close to home, making you feel vulnerable & feel the characters’ pain… because the ending, makes you feel strong, makes you feel like you, too, are a survivor. This book hits so, so hard, to see Hattie’s friends’ grief & their disbelief & their trying to find any answer but the true one… beware of this if you are very sensitive to stories about friends trying to navigate life through their best friend’s suicide, or discovering she wasn’t exactly who she presented herself as. But they are survivors. And they do find some peace, and some happiness in the end. And it is beautiful. To all those we have lost to mental illness, and to all those who suffer from it ( me, included ), and to the survivors out there. This one is for us, as much as it is an ode to those we have lost.

Again, please do proceed with caution though, if you think you will be triggered. This does not shy away from the hard truths of, well, anything.

[Jessica J. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Inspired in part by the author's own experience, The Stepping Off Place is a beautiful and bittersweet look at grief and surviving the suicide of a loved one. The summer before their senior year of high school, Reid's best friend Hattie goes to her family's vacation home for three months. The day before Hattie is supposed to return, Reid learns that she has drowned. The death is ruled intentional but Reid struggles to accept this fact, convinced that the Hattie she knew could never have done this.

If I am totally honest, it sometimes felt like there was a bit too much going on. The book follows how Reid copes with her complicated feelings of grief in the aftermath of the loss but it also looks at how she spent her own summer at home while Hattie was away. Always a bit socially awkward, Reid credited all of her social successes to simply following Hattie's lead, and her grieving process allows her to recognize her own strengths—which is actually a really lovely journey to follow. However, there's an almost-never ending social network that gets explored perhaps a bit too thoroughly: Hattie has at least four potential love interests; Reid herself has at least three potential love interests, a complicated family dynamic, and a separate support system at her summer job. No spoilers, but at the end of the book we see five teenagers come together to honor their grief as a unit and I feel like the emotional impact would not have been lessened if Rosenblum had trimmed that down to three.

That being said, the exploration of grief and mental illness here is spectacularly well-done. Reid's response to the trauma struck me as so realistic even if her actions sometimes felt like the kinds of things that could only happen in a YA novel. The things that Reid comes to learn about Hattie's mental health as she comes to accept the truth of the situation are all handled in a responsible way—all the side-eye to Thirteen Reasons Why for treating suicide like a tool of revenge or a response to a single action. Ultimately, the emotional resonance and the thoughtful exploration of serious topics outweighed the narrative imperfections for me and I truly came to love this book.

[Shannon Miz · Rating 5 out of 5]

You can find the full review and all the fancy and/or randomness that accompanies it at It Starts at Midnight

I think I cried through at least seventy percent of this book, and for me, that's a good thing. I adore when a book makes me feel, but this one will be hard hitting, no question. But there's hope and rebuilding, too, so it has a very bittersweet feeling. Let us talk about why I adored this one so much! 

►Like I mentioned, the feels! Look, going into a book that features a best friendship broken apart by suicide, you know you're going to be exploring a lot of emotions. Or at least, you will if the book is done well, which this one absolutely is. I cried, hard, through a pretty significant portion of it. But it was more than just a sobfest. There was also so much love and rebuilding, and ultimately, hope.

►Reid felt so very relatable. Who among us hasn't felt like "the best friend"? You have a friend who is seemingly larger than life, and you're just along for the ride. This is how Reid feels, and I have 100% been there. The thing Reid learns, and what I have learned in life, and what is just a good lesson for us all, is that sometimes a person is not as happy as they outwardly seem. I too have felt overshadowed by friends whose personalities simply glow, and it's hard to navigate. Reid is okay with being the sidekick in The Hattie Show, but what happens when she learns how hard Hattie's reality had been?

►Loads of mental illness talk. Obviously, this book is full of mental health discussion. Though most of it is Reid learning to cope with her grief, and what Hattie's mental illness looked like, it's certainly still present. And I think just as important, frankly. It's easy to not understand what someone is going through; this book allows the reader to take the journey of understanding more of what Hattie was struggling with. There's discussion about medication, and warning signs, and I thought the author handled it really well.

►There is a huge focus on relationships of all kinds. Obviously, Reid and Hattie's relationship is a huge plot point, but it's also about Reid forging new bonds and expanding on her existing bonds. There is some romance, but there is a lot of friendship building as well. There's also a big focus on Reid's family and how she navigates her relationships with them which is great. Reid's brother has autism, and one of the best things about their relationship is her growing to see how awesome he is, just the way he is. I won't lie, it's disarming at first, the way she reacted to him at times (Cait @ Paper Fury wrote an amazing post about this) but I think her growth and appreciation of him by the end makes it worthwhile.

►Ultimately, it's a story about Reid's growth and finding herself. Gosh I love these stories. Who Reid was with Hattie, who she will be moving forward, and who she will be in new relationships are questions at the forefront. And I love when a character can see that maybe they're more capable than they ever gave themselves credit for.

Bottom Line: Beyond lovely and completely heartfelt, this book brought all the tears, but also, all the hope.

[PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 STARS

Reid, unable to her accept best friend’s suicide, searches for answers to Hattie’s death.

THE STEPPING OFF PLACE is an ode to friendship, grief and mental illness that had the potential to be a much better book. Cameron Kelly Rosenblum’s beautiful word building is unfortunately bogged down with excessive dialogue and alternating timelines that add nothing to the characters or story.

Reid is a great character. At home, feels overshadowed by her severely autistic younger brother. Outside, she’s happy to live in Hattie’s shadow. Reid idealizes her best friend, not understanding the signs that Hattie has Bipolar II. Rosenblum does a good job showing some of the subtleties and nuances of mental illness and how sufferers try to cover their conditions. Her only glaring mistake was suggesting that people enjoy the manic phase of bipolar, something I’ve not heard from clients. Most find the out of control mania frightening and undesirable. Mania isn’t the happy opposite of depression. Manic episodes in Bipolar II, though less serious than Bipolar I, are out of control and can be expressed as fury sometimes resulting in legal consequences including violent outbursts resulting in injury, excessive spending resulting in bankruptcy, compulsive unprotected sex, job loss etc.

I loved Hattie’s family and would have liked to see more of them as well as more of Emma Rose. I also loved the way Rosenblum describes the real difficulty of having a severely autistic sibling rather than sugar coating Spencer’s behavior as endearing.

If THE STEPPING OFF PLACE focused more on the story of the friendship, suicide and grief and less on idle banter and scenes that felt like fillers, it would have been a 4-5 star read.

[Kelly Seaman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh, my heart! This book so perfectly encapsulates the heartbreaking way mental illness complicates reality, love and friendship. Hattie and Reid have wrecked me. What an absolutely gorgeous book.

[Blodeuedd Finland · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have said it before, but when it comes to YA fiction, I prefer the ones that deal with real issues. Those have depth, and meaning.

And in this one we have Reid, a bit of a loner, who feels she is the beta to her bestie. And she is happy like that. But her best friend Hattie goes away every summer for 3 months, and this summer she does not come back.

It was real. Reid sank into a black cloud when she found out Hattie was dead. She went through all emotions, grief, denial, anger. There are flashbacks to their last year, and previous years. The fun they had, and slowly we see more into Hattie, and what happened.

I liked it. It was never actually sad, it was a search, and a celebration of a friendship. And how grief can shatter someone.

I liked the narrator. She put this insecurity into her Reid voice that fitted so well.
A really good audio to listen to

[Jen (Pop! Goes The Reader) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Did you find this review helpful? Find more of my reviews at Pop! Goes The Reader!

“Our lives are millions of moments strung together. Some are louder or bigger, happier or sadder, simply more demanding of our attention when we look back over the sea of moments that make a life. We don’t remember the events of our own timeline sequentially, from start to finish – not even the funeral for one we love fiercely. Instead, we remember with aching clarity the smell of wooden pews baked by August heat in an airless church. The strangled cough of a grown man pushing away tears. And the slump of a mother’s shoulders. It’s these moments, soldered into our souls, that shape who we become.”

Reid MacGregory has been Hattie Darrow’s sidekick and best friend for nearly six years, the metaphorical Sancho Panza to Hattie’s Don Quixote. The girls are inseparable, and no-one knows Hattie better than Reid. At least, that’s what Reid thinks, until Hattie suddenly and unexpectedly dies by suicide and Reid is left to question everything she thought she once knew about Hattie, their friendship, and herself. Cameron Kelly Rosenblum’s young adult debut, The Stepping Off Place, offers an intimate, unflinching and ultimately hopeful examination of loss, mental illness and the grieving process as Reid attempts to excavate the life – and secrets – of the person she held most dear.

The Stepping Off Place is divided into dual timelines, exploring the events of Reid’s life both before and after Hattie’s death. This was an excellent and effective choice on the part of the author, as it creates a foundation that allows the reader to understand the depth of connection between Reid and Hattie and why Hattie’s death affects Reid so acutely. Crafting the novel in this way also allows Hattie to become a three-dimensional character in her own right. While Hattie’s death prompts Reid to look inward and examine both their friendship and herself in a new light, Hattie is not a facile prop whose only purpose is to act as the catalyst for the protagonist’s growth. We’re given glimpses into Hattie’s thoughtful, loving relationship with Reid’s autistic younger brother, Spencer, and sun-drenched memories of months spent at Hattie’s family’s summer home in Maine. In doing this, Rosenblum presents Hattie as a vibrant, fully-realized girl with memories, insecurities, desires, fears, flaws and dreams of her own. Her purpose and value are not defined by the final moments of her life, nor is she villainized for them. While Reid and others in Hattie’s life initially struggle to understand why Hattie chose to conceal the truth about her bipolar disorder and why her life ended as it did, the novel ultimately (and rightly) presents this as the fault of society’s stigmatization of mental illness and not the fault of Hattie herself.

Rosenblum explores a number of important, relevant topics including mental illness, suicide and grief in a sensitive and empathetic manner and in doing so demonstrates their complexity and nuance. In mourning the loss of her best friend, Reid’s grief causes her to be angry, dismissive, resentful and stubbornly resistant to the love and support of those around her, because to accept this help would be to accept that Hattie is truly gone. The author presents grieving not as a process to be completed and forgotten, but as an ongoing undertaking that requires work, patience and understanding. Everyone in Hattie’s life copes with her loss differently. Not all of these methods of grieving are productive or palatable – at one point Reid becomes convinced that Hattie was murdered because she finds this easier to understand and accept and because investigating gives her a sense of purpose – but it is because of its messy, unflinching, complicated portrayal of grief that the novel is to be commended.

In addition to offering a meditation on loss and grief, The Stepping Off Place also includes a quiet but no less powerful journey of self-discovery and acceptance. Because Reid has long perceived herself as Hattie’s sidekick, Hattie’s death forces Reid to reexamine her life and identity without the person she has used to help her define both. Without her charismatic, outgoing friend by her side, Reid is forced to venture outside of her comfort zone and confront the fears and insecurities that once dictated how she moved through the world. She’s challenged to make new friendships and re-examine old ones and it’s through adversity that Reid begins to realize she has a far greater support system and richer life than she previously imagined possible.

The Stepping Off Place is an intensely moving portrait of grief and healing in the wake of unexpected loss. It’s difficult to believe that this is Cameron Kelly Rosenblum’s debut novel, as the book offers a compelling, intricate and deeply emotional story that suggests a far greater amount of experience and confidence in their craft on the part of the writer than might be expected in an author’s first published work. While some of the subjects explored in the novel, including suicide, mental illness, and questionable consent might prove triggering for some readers and should be approached with caution, those looking for a intense character-driven story that delves deeply into the beauty and complexities of female friendship and challenging contemporary issues relevant to many young readers today won’t go wrong choosing The Stepping Off Place as their next read.

[Caitie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Yet another DNF. This was another one of those "I'm a girl with only one close friend who had died and/or moved away and now I want to uncover the truth about they did what they did" book. I wanted to like Reid, the main character, but she had no personality at all. Her whole personality is literally tied in with Hattie. The writing is was just okay, it didn't wow me and didn't make me want to keep going. I also felt that Reid's mother's treatment (or lack thereof) of her little brother's Autism. She treated it as if it was something to campaign against or throw a fundraiser for and not something that affected her family, like the brother was some kind of sick means to an end. The mother uses fundraising in order to make herself feel better for not being able to "fix" or "cure" her son.

[Nicole 🌹 · Rating 4 out of 5]

i would give this book five stars, but i just can’t. though i loved the language and writing style and effortless way emotions and characters were conveyed, i felt there were too many main characters, time spent on Reid’s growth was wasted with irrelevant tidbits from her and Hattie’s childhood. which of course was important, but at times seemed a little over the top. something was missing to give this book the extra WOW. can’t put my finger on it. in the end though, great story and worth the read! definitely a page turner.

[Harper · Rating 2 out of 5]

DNF @ 20%

“War against autism”
“Survive his kind of autism”
Nope I’m out

Tried going back to this a couple times to see if it got better/these statements got dealt with, but the rest of it was not good enough to balance out. Main character def felt like an adult trying real hard to write a teenager (see: multiple uses of the word “nekkid”). I know this deals with important issues but I just could not get around these things to get to them.

[Jenni · Rating 3 out of 5]

Trigger warning: suicide

What am I doing, reading a book about a girl who has committed suicide? I don't even know because I picked this up a few days after the 5 year anniversary of my sister's suicide. This book definitely shows how suicide affects everyone: your family, your close friends, and even those kids at school who don't talk to you or you don't know very well. Suicide's arms are far reaching.

[Lydia · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Stepping Off Place reminded me of Looking For Alaska in lot of good ways. A serious story about love and mental illness and grief that both teens and adults will be able to relate to.

[Heather · Rating 3 out of 5]

I will fully admit that maybe I wasn't in the mood for this book and trudged on anyway. I think there's some valid acknowledgments of grief, being a survivor of suicide (TW for this book for non-graphic mentions of suicide) mental health and struggling with a mood disorder in some regards. That being said, I felt like this one dragged in places and overall was just okay. Nothing really set it apart for me.

Also as an audiobook note: the narrator's inflections with certain words and phrases also bugged me?

[Jena · Rating 5 out of 5]

This novel was a genuine, heartfelt story of friendship and heartache..it was written about devastating loss without triggering personal experiences of my own. I look forward to reading more from this author

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an arc from Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.

The stepping off place has left me with so many feelings.

This book is about Hattie and Reid. Best friends. But when Hattie drowns two weeks before their senior year, Reid is left to question everything.

This book takes place in then and now. I loved reading the ‘then’ parts. The summer of Hammy and Reid was super cute and dorky and I absolutely loved reading about them. Hattie annoyed me at some points, but she grew on me.
The ‘now’ part takes place mostly after Hattie died. It’s about grief, understanding and accepting.

The stepping off place is about friendship, love and mental health. I always have a soft spot for these kind of books, but this one was executed really well. Even after finishing this book I still felt sad. The plot was good. I might’ve changed some things myself, but the overall was great.
I feel like there was a lot of character development with Reid. She started out as a sidekick, but grew into her own hero.

I finished the stepping off place in two days, so that has to mean something, right?

This was an amazing read and I can’t wait for the sequel!

[Emily Claire · Rating 4 out of 5]

A beautifully written, and brutally honest look at the impacts of suicide and mental health.

This book is written with clear compassion and authenticity, bringing to life a cast of characters who are each grieving in their own way. While there are all imperfect, and even at times not likable, they are well developed and believable.

The dual timeline narration is one of the most impactful aspects of this book, specifically they way they gradually begin to answer questions of the characters and their world.

It was an intense read, because of the subject matter but also the unflinching portrayal of grief. This, combined with the length, made me work my way through this one at a slower pace.

All in all, a powerful and moving story. My thanks to the publisher for an e-arc.

[Courtney · Rating 4 out of 5]

Facing the death of a friend is difficult enough beaut when it’s your best friend, you’re in high school and it’s rumored to be a suicide....makes it unbearable. Reid is a wonderful character to follow and she really speaks to the stages of grief so well. I couldn’t put the book down, I wanted to know if we ever got a why.

I found the characters to feel real. It didn’t seem dramatized it make any of the character too sweet or too mean. Everyone has faults and these characters did. I guess my only nitpick about it is how the ending is almost too sweet but for a bittersweet ending it was pretty good.

[Rebecca · Rating 1 out of 5]

I purchased this book with the hopes of adding to my classroom library. While the premise of the book is promising, the pacing and the way the timeline of events is presented makes if difficult to read. Additionally the main character does not seem to have any personality independent of the expectations of her peers and family. Finally the presentation of metal illness in the book is inconsistent, and the dialogue surround the discussion of these issues is not nuanced or reflective of the emotional complexity of dealing with the challenges and triumphs of supporting children and adolescents.

[Jessie · Rating 5 out of 5]

THE STEPPING OFF PLACE is a riveting and full-hearted exploration of grief and the aftermath of loss, but more than that, it's a beautiful reminder that there are few things as precious in life as the friendships we have when we are young.

[Céline · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF. The amount of ableism towards a character with autism is appalling. Referring to the character as a problem and an embarrassment is just not ok. Really disappointed.

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.7
It was good until the end, where it got sickeningly cheesy

[Jill Jemmett · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hattie is Reid’s energetic and fun best friend. One day, when Reid is looking forward to Hattie returning from her summer at the cottage, she learns that Hattie has died. Reid is shocked to hear that Hattie’s death has been ruled a suicide. Reid can’t understand how someone as happy as Hattie could have killed herself. Reid embarks on an investigation of her own to find the truth behind Hattie’s death.

This was an emotionally heavy book. Some trigger warnings are suicide and sexual assault. Mental health and grief also played an important part of this story. Even though someone may not appear to have mental health problems, doesn’t mean they aren’t suffering. Mental health illnesses can be an invisible disease, which isn’t apparent from a person’s outward appearance though they may be suffering internally.

I felt so sympathetic towards Reid throughout the story. She felt like she had a hard life because she had to look after her autistic brother. Her family had to organize their life around her brother’s schedule. Though everyone could see Reid’s brother’s autism, Hattie’s mental health problems weren’t as apparent at first glance. Reid couldn’t understand how her friend, who appeared happy, could struggle so much with her mental health that she would take her own life. Reid’s theories behind Hattie’s death were so convincing, I was tempted to believe her. This story shows how Reid copes with her grief by being in denial about the cause of Hattie’s death.

This was an emotional and powerful story.

Thank you HarperCollins for providing a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[Maddy M-N · Rating 4 out of 5]

I would rate it a 5 star but it swore too much. But besides that this is one of the most emotional books I've ever read. It dealt with love and loss and heartbreak. Recovery and grief. And so many other hard topis. Suicide is a real problem and you never know what a person is going through. This book displays that when a girl is shocked that her best friend committed suicide. The friend left behind was shocked to say the least. She had no idea her friend felt that way. It dealt with the story of loss and the things that lead up to it. A captivating book. Will read again.

[Flor Méndez · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pocos libros de YA tratan tan bien y tan crudamente las enfermedades mentales y el suicidio. Me encantaron los personajes, desde Reid y Hammy hasta la mismísima Emma Rose.

Y terminé amando a Hattie, a pesar de que al principio quizás no me caía del todo bien por su relación algo tóxica con Reid. La entendí, y entender a un personaje suicida a veces se me hace muy difícil.

4 estrellas.

Reseña basada en el ARC.

[Tracy Griffin · Rating 4 out of 5]

So good!
I found it hard to believe a good person who loves life, who isn't afraid of taking the bull by the horns, would summit suicide. But who knows why.
I liked the ending.
If you like 13 Reasons Why ( which I had not read the book. But I did watch 2 seasons from my library. And I need to watch the 3rd season somewhere down the road.) But this book reminds when I'd watch the two seasons of 13 Reasons Why.

[Audrey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gets social anxiety, Autism, suicide,& suicide survivor all right. I wasn’t going to read this, it hurts to much because I lost 2 cousins to suicide. At 5:30am running late for work, I just grabbed a book from the stack of books my friend loaned me.... this was at the bottom. I put it there since I wanted to read others first. Clearly the other side knew what I needed to read. 100% so good.

[Katelyn Kiermaier · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wasn’t quite sure at first, but by the end I was so moved by the honesty and poignancy of this book. Would definitely recommend whether or not you’re into teen lit. Felt very therapeutic to read this. Well done.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so good. Very detailed and well written the storyline.

[Kristin Hart · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a beautiful, heart-wrenching page turner that I could not put down. A book about high school that actually felt realistic and relatable.