Learning to Be: Finding Your Center After the Bottom Falls Out

by Juanita Campbell Rasmus, Juanita Campbell Rasmus

Juanita called it "The Crash." Her counselor labeled it "a major depressive episode." Others called it a nervous breakdown. On the spiritual front, it was a dark night of the soul. This experience landed Juanita, a busy pastor, mother, and community leader, in bed. When everything in her life finally came to a stop, she found that she had to learn to be―with herself and with God―all over again. If you are longing for a trustworthy companion through your dark days, this book is here for you. Each chapter includes life-giving spiritual practices to help you discover your own new ways of being.

Genres: Self Help, Memoir, Christian, Nonfiction, Christian Non Fiction, Inspirational, Mental Health

176 pages, Hardcover

Published September 15, 2020

Reviews

[Jeanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

RATING 2.5 STARS

In that position, weighed down by the burden of doing until I had been undone.

Juanita Rasmus is writing her account of her fall. A great depression that fell on her and how she overcame. To be honest, I thought this book would be more bible based it is however, more experienced base. I appreciate the author's experience however, it is not my experience. Did I get encouragement from it? Yes and no. Did I learn anything about God? Nothing new. The trouble about each of our experiences is the outcome. Then the outcome can determine our faith. Is our faith determined by circumstances or on who God is? Rasmus has been blessed by the Lord no doubt. So depending on what you are looking for, will determine if this is a good fit for you.

This should be labeled more of a memoir instead of a Christian book.

A special thank you to Intervarsity Press and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.

[Bree Mills · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. I was blown away by the openness and vulnerability of the author and simultaneously challenged by the pace and driven was of my own life. This is an incredible book that I know will save the lives of many women in ministry and I can’t wait to share it. It’s open story, and spaces and tools for reflection were incredibly helpful to me and I will cherish this book because I believe it prevent me from another foray into burnout. Thank you so much for your honesty and willingness to share your story so that the body of Christ might be built up!

[Lori Neff · Rating 5 out of 5]

Relatable, wise, practical. It's a must-read.

[Matthew Ross · Rating 5 out of 5]

What do you do when the bottom falls out?

There is not a lot that Juanita and I have in common, yet as I was reading her story I was seeing myself.

When I pick books to read I want books that connect with me and this one hit the mark. I found myself taking time to think through my life as Juanita was telling hers.

If you have ever found yourself wondering what is next in the midst of your life I encourage you to pick up this book and be encouraged by Juanita. The pause and reflect sections at the end of the chapters gives great practical application to what Juanita just spoke about.

While Juanita’s story is not one that I would wish on anyone, I am thankful for her season of life so that she can speak into so many other pastors or caregivers who often put others in front of their own needs. Thank you Juanita for taking the time to write this book so someone like me can learn to be.

[Elissa Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is so much more than just one woman's story of depression. The author is a Christian pastor, and thus, writing from that space and tradition, but the concepts resonant regardless. Rasmus walks us through her recovery and finding a new, radically authentic, way to be. There is guidance and prompts for anyone on the path to the same destination.

[Ellen O'brien · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pastor Juanita Rasmus uses the story of her "nervous breakdown" to introduce a variety of spiritual practices and life-giving mental practices that enable people to receive the deep love of God and to live in a grace filled way.

[Marie Noack]

I know the author well. She's what you would call "my sister from another mother".Juanita is truly who she writes about. Learning to Be: Finding Your Center After the Bottom Falls Out is for each soul to read. Life can throw us so many curves, twists in the road we just had no plan to experience, yet we find in our life we just entered into a door we had no plan of entering into and we have no idea what to do while we are in here. Read Juanitas book...find answers...she would never leave you astray. She truly loves you, and there's not a thing you can do about it! From a soul who knows her so very well.

[Dayna Hauschild · Rating 5 out of 5]

Enjoyed this book so much that it address depression in the life of a spiritual leader and follower of Christ. Very relatable and love how she taught about how emotions and wellbeing need time of silence and reflection during the darkest of times. Would highly recommend!

[Ste7en Foster · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm a big fan of Rudy Rasmus, but I've never met his wife. He does, however, beam like a lighthouse whenever he speaks of her. This book shows you why he chose to spend his life with her. Intelligent, driven, compassionate, caring, devout, Mrs. Rasmus is like so many accomplished women you meet. On top of everything. Always giving. Always with a word of support or encouragement. Always ready. And without you knowing it—often without HER knowing it herself—she is sinking to the bottom of it all, she's given so much it's taken everything out of her, and words lose all meaning, except the word Depression.

This is the tale of a driven, Christ-centered woman whose life and faith get sideswiped by...hold on to your hats for this villain: Everyday Life.

And it's in that, that the book succeeds wildly. This is told by a person everyone can relate to and can have a relationship with during the time you're with her in these pages. She's honest, empathetic, instructional, real. Rasmus shows that any of us are just THIS close to losing our shit. The exquisite part of the story is her chronicling of God communicating with her through it all.

There's a reason Rasmus' church is Beyonce's de facto spiritual home: the Spirit is all over this church and within His people.

[Marlishia Mayes Carey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was great read. I definitely will read this one again. There is so much guidance to self evaluation and reflection.

[Shauna · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a powerful read. I love the honesty the author shared about her “crash” and the growth she experienced as she recovered. There were many places in the book where I could insert my name in place of the author’s because I could relate to the situation. And it’s all done through her faith in God.

[Vernita · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book. Pastor Rasmus was honest, open, and willing to allow us to understand her journey. This helped me realize it's ok to fall, I just get up, and trust God will truly guide me

[Mechthild · Rating 5 out of 5]

You can learn to be yourself
Pastor, spiritual director, and member of the Renovaré ministry team Juanita Campbell Rasmus asks herself why learning to be me is so difficult. With her book "Learning to Be. Finding Your Center After the Bottom Falls Out", published by InterVarsity Press, Juanita tries to give an answer to this and similar questions. In an open, honest, transparent and vulnerable way Juanita invites readers into her life. She does not hesitate to talk about her "crash" (depression) and about the consequences. She states "I chose to share my story because all too often in Western culture, and especially in the church, we are reticent to discuss mental health along with the related spiritual implications. It is my hope that telling my story will shed light on the resources available to someone in the aftermath of a mental health diagnosis (or any devastation that affect one's well-being) and provide courage to wait in the darkness, because often that's where the real treasures are stored" (p. 8/9).
The sixteen chapters close with a "Pause To Reflect" where she challenges readers to apply the teachings to their own lives. Some of the chapters are furthermore separated by "Interludes" - profound parts of Juanita's personal story. Notes at the end of the book help readers to go deeper if they are interested in a certain topic. All in all I really appreciated Juanita's book and highly recommend it to people who need help because their bottom has fallen out and to others who are at the side of such people.
The complimentary copy of this book was provided by the publisher through NetGalley free of charge. I was under no obligation to offer a positive review. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.
#LearningToBe #IVP #InterVarsityPress #IVPress

[Kristin Emily]

Audiobook read by author.

I LOVED this book. Juanita is honest, vulnerable, and grace-filled as she shares about her battle with depression and anxiety. I stepped into Juanita's story alongside her; her beautiful writing carried me into each scene. And, as each chapter ended, Juanita invited me to walk a bit further on my own journey, offering ponderables.

Depression and anxiety can twirl your brain, making the simplest tasks foreign. I longed to jump up and give Juanita a hug of thanks as she described laying in bed, needing to go to the bathroom but couldn't figure out the steps to make that happen. The struggle can be real! Thank you, Juanita, for validating some of my own twirled-brain experiences!

I would definitely recommend this book.

[Sylvia Hubbard · Rating 5 out of 5]

In this candid read, Juanita Rasmus in Learning to Be, lays out her experience with depression and rising with grace and courage. Readers are taken under, around and through as they learn how to go from darkness into their own light. I was enthralled at her truths and how she really took a look inside her "crash". I agreed with her how we live in two worlds of doing and being. And I loved that she shone a light on the world of mental illness, giving us an understanding we can't find anywhere else. Ms Rasmus voice needs to be heard more in our world of chaos, so peace can come to all

[Mona Rey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the chronicle of Pastor Juanita Rasmus’ “dark night of the soul.” She writes in a way that feels as if she is leading you through her garden by the hand, telling stories of how each shrub, tree and bush came to find its place there; and the work it took to plant, prune and trim them all. Every page reveals healing she experienced, and every chapter gifts you with a healing practice. This book is for this moment. Don’t miss it!

[Kristyn DeNooyer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Detailing the path to healing after her depressive crash and experience of burnout, Rasmus draws from several traditions of Christian practice and shares the role they each play in her process of regaining rest and formational rhythms. I appreciated the accessibility of the content of this book, the gentle tone, and the reflection questions paired with each chapter that invite the reader to explore fresh pathways of meeting with Jesus.

[LaTrease Price-Gistard · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book. It shares Pastor Juanita’s journey through depression as well as providing helpful tools that will provoke you to reflect on things you may be going through. Several of the things she discusses hit pretty close to home with me and it was very insightful to see how to dealt with things.

[Amanda Pascoe · Rating 5 out of 5]

Inspiring, challenging, life-breathing. Pastor Juanita's willingness to share such a personal journey is a testament to her calling and a gift. Reading the final page, I'm already making plans to reread it and dig deeper into the references and encouragement she recommends.

[Eric · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great resource for those who are going through difficult times. Chapters are short and easy to follow. Practical advice and steps. Love the reflection sections.

[Jan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very personal book by a person who was trying way too hard to do everything she felt the Lord was asking her to do. It is a very autobiographical true story of her falling apart and how with counselling and understanding she was able to put her life back together in a pattern which better reflected her skills and personality after her major depressive episode. You may be caught up with the thought that this could be you and how close to the edge you sometimes feel. I certainly was moved to think maybe I had taken on too much just because I was asked to do something, and maybe this could be my story, are you trying too hard to be the good girl?
This is a book every perfectionist should read personal mental health is not a subject in religious books often enough. After each section recounting her daily struggle, is a section, pause to reflect allowing you time to really think yourself through. She tied the prodigal son story in also and the fact, she had been the other brother, not seeing how every life choice made him to resent the runaway brother and the family choices. One of her suggestions was to use the Enneagram. Until she hit rock bottom and didn’t realize her gas gauge had been on empty and she was seriously depressed and no simple weekend patch up deal was going to make a difference.
Give this book a try, and seriously take the time to really investigate yourself with professional help if necessary. You need to let go of judging other and go back to the beginning of your upbringing and rebuild yourself. There are plenty of Biblical verses and suggestions which may fit you, we are all unique.
An excellent self help book that won’t make you feel quilty for your choices. Give it to a friend, or may sure you have a copy for yourself.

[Michelle Kidwell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Learning to Be
Finding Your Center After the Bottom Falls Out
by Juanita Campbell Rasmus
InterVarsity Press
IVP
Christian | Religion & Spirituality
Pub Date 15 Sep 2020

I am reviewing a copy of Learning to Be: Finding Your Center After the Bottom Falls Out through InterVarsity Press and Netgalley:


It felt as if every nerve in her body was popping. It felt like large strong hands were slowly applying pressure while breaking a family-size package of uncooked, dry spaghetti. Only Pastor Juanita was the spaghetti, breaking down one piece at a time. This is how Juanita Rasmus begins the wise, frank, and witty account of what she later called "The Crash" and what her counselor labeled "a major depressive episode


In this book the author reminds us that depression is more than just a diagnosis; depression becomes the mind’s default program. It becomes the way that the body and mind seek to cope in crisis. Depression is the result of a complex set of byproducts affecting the brain, including chemical imbalances, faulty mood regulation by the brain, or genetic vulnerability.


In addition to exhaustion and depression, on the spiritual front she experienced a dark night of the soul. When everything in her life finally came to a stop, she found that she had to learn to be—with herself and with God—all over again.


I give Learning to Be five out of five stars!


Happy Reading!

[D.J. Lang · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had to laugh at the comment a reader made saying this should be a memoir but not a Christian book. God's fingerprints all over this book. A non-Christ follower is going to say it is too Christian. The reader is correct that this is Rasmus' story, a narrative that will help so many of us caught up 24/7 in doing good works when even Jesus took time to eat (leisurely) and sleep.

I first heard of this book when Rasmus went on a podcast. I promptly went out and bought the book. I finally had time on vacation (I know, the irony) to read it. Much of her story I heard on the podcast but I'm still glad I bought the book (great reflection questions at the end of every chapter). I'm also glad I heard her speak. She is the one from whom I first heard, "Eat the meat and spit out the bones". That has always been my take when I read a book, too. I just never had a good way to explain it until Rasmus repeated what she had heard from her elders.

The subtitle of the book "Finding Your Center After the Bottom Falls Out" is going to resonate with a lot of readers. Some wise readers are going to read the book before the bottom falls out.

Would my mom read it? You know, she just might. I think I'll see if she would like to read it.

[Little · Rating 3 out of 5]

3- or a 2+ It's obvious that Rasmus is extremely well-read. She synthesizes relevant points from dozens of authors in cogent and clear ways. She's got a lot of wisdom, and this slim book distills it into a very approachable format. Short chapters. Pauses for reflection. It's clearly designed to be accessible for folks currently recovering from or in the throes of mental or physical illness.

My low rating is 100% just because of her writing style. Rasmus's writing flows and winds in a very organic way. Which, I'm sure, will feel warm, inviting, and honest to many readers. It feels very "woo-woo" to me, though. And it made me tired to read it.

Disclosure: I received a free copy of this book through the Speakeasy book review network in exchange for my honest review. #LearningToBe

[Neil Saltmarsh · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is an authenticity that I found with this book where the author has recounted some sad and fearful and depressing days and has come out the other side. Sometimes, I think some Christian authors are a little glib about a victorious life in Christ whereas there is substance to those who say look I have and have had problems. Personally I think that these works are a lot richer and more based in reality. I also like that this is not written by a white, western man because I love to hear voices that reflect the experiences of gender and race. Even though I am one of the white western men, I could relate to Juanita's experiences of depression and getting things wrong spiritually. I truly enjoyed this book because it was honest.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

The title and beautiful cover drew me to read this book. It is a reflection of struggles and continuing recovery from serious depression by a Christian woman. I appreciate the author's openness and honesty in sharing what she went through and what she learned. The advance digital copy I read had formatting issues, which may be why the writing sometimes felt redundant and scattered. I liked the reflections at the end of each chapter.

I received an ARC from NetGalley. The book will be released on September 15, 2020.

[Gail Burgess · Rating 3 out of 5]

Although I gleaned some tidbits as I read this, I realized it was not really written for me. This seems to be more a book for folks who are depressed, despairing or generally feeling lost and needing to find their way again. The author had suffered a debilitating "crash" and shares what she learned as she worked her way out of the severe depression. A main problem was her wanting to be perfect and please everyone. When she realized she could trust God to help her and didn't need everyone's approval, she began her road to recovery.

[Felicia L. · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was deeply meaningful for me, especially as a Christian who also battles with anxiety and depression. Pastor Juanita approaches the topic of depression and mental health issues with frankness and humility in a way that doesn’t trivialize or sensationalize what so many endure but are unable to name. The resources, activities, and supplemental readings are also immensely helpful. I know that I will come back to this one again in the future.

[Lauren Anderson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I joined a 6 week book club at my work and this was the book that was chosen. I was only able to show up to 1 meeting and since I don’t ever DNF a book I stayed the course. This book was about a woman who fell into a deep depression and God helped her see her way out of it. I enjoyed her stories and acknowledging that we as Christians don’t have to do anything extra to earn feel or deserve Gods love

[LeTanya · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed the honesty the author displayed in this book. It helped me to understand the importance of self
awareness, self care and self control. Thank you Juanita for writing such an eye opening inspiring book especially for women married to ministry. I would definitely recommend this book to others.