A groundbreaking look at marriage, one of the most basic and universal of all human institutions, which reveals the emotional, physical, economic, and sexual benefits that marriage brings to individuals and society as a whole.
The Case for Marriage is a critically important intervention in the national debate about the future of family. Based on the authoritative research of family sociologist Linda J. Waite, journalist Maggie Gallagher, and a number of other scholars, this book’s findings dramatically contradict the anti-marriage myths that have become the common sense of most Americans. Today a broad consensus holds that marriage is a bad deal for women, that divorce is better for children when parents are unhappy, and that marriage is essentially a private choice, not a public institution. Waite and Gallagher flatly contradict these assumptions, arguing instead that by a broad range of indices, marriage is actually better for you than being single or divorced– physically, materially, and spiritually. They contend that married people live longer, have better health, earn more money, accumulate more wealth, feel more fulfillment in their lives, enjoy more satisfying sexual relationships, and have happier and more successful children than those who remain single, cohabit, or get divorced.
The Case for Marriage combines clearheaded analysis, penetrating cultural criticism, and practical advice for strengthening the institution of marriage, and provides clear, essential guidelines for reestablishing marriage as the foundation for a healthy and happy society.
“A compelling defense of a sacred union. The Case for Marriage is well written and well argued, empirically rigorous and learned, practical and commonsensical.” -- William J. Bennett, author of The Book of Virtues
“Makes the absolutely critical point that marriage has been misrepresented and misunderstood.” -- The Wall Street Journal
This book is full of the kind of statistics I could read all day. It's so interesting! Waite and Gallagher look at many of the assumed myths of marriage: cohabitation provides the same benefits, married women are more likely to abused and less likely to be happy, men have a less exciting sex life, divorce should be based on a couples "happiness." Using statistical analysis they refute each one and shed light on many of the amazing benefits of marriage. For example, did you know that "compared to married people, the nonmarried...have higher rates of mortality than the married: about 50% higher for women and 250% higher among men." They later state that "divorce seems to be about as dangerous to a man's health as picking up a pack-a-day cigarette habit." Crazy! Waite and Gallagher used many studies as they gathered information. So much interesting information. Makes me more grateful that I get to enjoy the unique and wonderful relationship, marriage. (How cheesy am I?)
I skipped over much of the book because it wasn’t new information for me. A few things to note. This book was published in 2000. Facts about marriage are never going to expire! It’s more of a heads up than a warning.
The book is a good read. But if you’re short on time there have been many blogs written about it that summarize its contents pretty accurately.
I am some one with a psychology degree from a. Major university. My degree is research based. I enjoy reading these types of book. In school in the late 1990s we were being warned that much of the research coming out of the 70s and 80s about everything was poor research, biased and to be used with caution. I think this book proves it. While it’s written from a traditional standpoint and conservative views it isn’t pushy. It basically concludes that ANY marriage is of benefit. Not just traditional Marriages.
4 stars instead of 5: I don’t agree with some of the conclusions at the end of the book.
As the divorce rate climbs, as health deteriorates, as children continue to carry the burden of their parent’s mistakes, I think this book is a good read for everyone.
It made a good case for maintaining marriage as it is based on decades of research. It's definitely from a traditional marriage/conservative standpoint, but it was not overly pushy about traditional gender roles. It was an interesting read.
This book made me glad that I am married. It was nice to read a study that supported what I already knew (ie. that being married you get a lot more done). One of the most interesting parts of the books was the comparison's between married couples and cohabiting couples, and it showed that making a commitment to each other makes men and women happier and healthier. I especially liked chapter 6 ;)
This book was a good exploration into the positive and life-enhancing qualities that married people can expect. My parents divorced early in my life, so this book was useful in breaking my misconceptions of marriage and helped me to foster an appreciation for the act of getting married.
The statistics in this book could be a little mind-numbing at times but it certainly made me think about the benefits of marriage in new ways. I read it because I watched a debate that Maggie Gallagher participated in and she impressed me very much.
I enjoyed this book a lot personally and I agree with the premise of the book that marriage is beneficial compared to just dating or just cohabitation. There is no new information beyond that. This book is filled with statistics and studies the authors use to prove their point that marriage helps health wise, intimacy wise, which is okay they do a good job in stating their case. However, I found the book a bit on the boring side because it seemed every paragraph had some statistic in it. As I mentioned before I agree with the premise of the book, although the authors are Christians and they do quote the Bible a bit, overall this book can be useful for the secular audience as well. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in the topic.
My experience with the book was mainly positive however I did find some concerns that I would like to put forth in this review. Chapter one begins with the Post marriage myths, which according to the authors deal with the fact that marriage is viewed as unnecessary. These myths are successfully tackled all through the book. These myths include that divorce is best for kids if the marriage is bad, that marriage is about kids if you do not have any then you do not have to marry, that marriage is a bad deal for women, that women experience marital violence in marriage and that marriage is a private matter.
Chapter two outlines some of the benefits of marriage such as permanence, and specialization such as the woman specializes in the household as the homemaker and the man specializes in his career and earning money for the family. Chapter three deals with Cohabitation and what a huge blunder it really is. I did not like the fact the authors failed to mention studies that show that when people cohabit and then marry those couples are more likely to divorce anyways than those who married right away. The information that was covered by the authors was that cohabitation is usually not permanent. And one of the partners is usually not sure about the match, therefore they might not want to get married (commitment issues). And since the couple does not have that permanence they are less likely to solve issues or even try to stick it out. A lot of times cohabitation is the result of the fear of fidelity where couples have "open relationships", a lot of women get duped like this. In a sense that they believe that they can have sex without any feelings, which is a fallacy that feminists tend to propagate. In fact married women with permanent partners and emotional trust actually have better sex lives then live in couples, as the authors note.
Chapter four is about health and the authors give proof as to why marriage makes you more healthy. Such benefits include a longer life, a power to heal (through the constant support of a loved one) and so on. Now the problem I had with this chapter was the fact that the authors had a section titled "The virtues of Nagging" Really???? This is the most ludicrous presupposition ever, it is insane that any woman could think that she really can change the man through the "power" of nagging. First of all men are not kids they are men, they do not deserve a woman especially their loving wife to worry them with nagging. The rationale that the authors give for this is that women nag men into better health such as discouraging smoking, drinking, and speeding. A lot of men do stop these behaviors when they marry. For example, if the man is single he might hang out with buddies he might speed and smoke. But a married man who is carrying a baby in the back seat,will not dare to speed and endanger his child no matter what. But according to the authors the reason a man stops these immature behaviors is because the woman nags him. That is absolutely a lie. Besides if a woman marries a drunk or a drug addict husband there is no amount of "nagging" that will change him. Simply put women need to put away the fantasies that they somehow can change men, that is impossible you only can change yourself. I also do not like how the authors lumped all of the single men into the one category saying that men are irresponsible (before they marry at least).
Chapter five talks about happiness and mental health of the married versus the unmarried and cohabiting couples. Chapter six talks about the sexual advantages of marriage. This involves easy access and no spending of resources since the married live together, the guy does not have to spend money for a date or the wife does not have to buy new clothes for a date, so proximity matters. Another important issue is the fact that wives in stable relationships enjoy better sexual lives, since their long time husbands are more likely to care about them to give them the pleasure. Rather then a random guy who doesn't care about the woman.
Chapter seven shows how married people earn more money whether it be double earner or if a wife is a homemaker. The housewife specializes therefore she is able to save money for the family (no transportation costs, no day care cots and so on). I did not like how in this chapter the working wife(meaning a woman who works outside the home) was portrayed as a super woman the authors were talking about how the career woman also helps the husband with his career. She also arranges all the meeting with friends and family she does all the household chores and childcare and so on. This kind of contradicts the authors own premise that wives would be happy in such a marriage, in fact a woman described by the authors can no way exist in reality and still be fulfilled in her marriage. A wife works full time with her husband, yet she is the one helping the husband with his career doing all the chores, and child care. No wonder so many married career women are unhappy.
Chapter eight talks about poverty and how single or divorced women are more likely to experience poverty and poverty related dilemmas. Such as their kids get less education, become involved in crime or become teenage mothers. Chapter nine explains why even not so good marriages are better for children then a divorce. Which kind of goes a long with chapter eight divorced parents lack resources, so their kids turn to crime and exhibit emotional and behavioral issues. Chapter ten reiterates why divorce is not such a good deal.
Chapter eleven explains that married women experience less domestic abuse then women in live in relationships. The confusion is due to the fact that domestic abuse is usually related to the traditional patriarchal standard of marriage, which feminists seek to destroy. Yet this patriarchal system actually protects women, because as a study cited by the authors couples who believe in more traditional views the husbands are less likely to beat their wives then live in boyfriends. In fact most domestic and child abuse comes from live in boyfriends, because as common sense tells us these boyfriends do not care about random children. Chapter twelve goes to reiterate a lot of the points made in the books. Chapter thirteen explains why marriage is in trouble (due to laws). And in chapter fourteen authors make suggestions on what to do to solve the divorce crisis.
Overall the book is positive and useful since it shows the usefulness of a proper marriage. And this proper marriage and family base is a root of a successful society. As more divorces creep in the more social turmoil and crimes are seen, that is why marriage is so important in raising moral and successful generation for the future.
It is genuinely so disappointing that this is considered an academic book. Even when you take into account that the book is outdated… it is a completely one sided. I appreciate and believe in some of its points, but the framing is intentionally sexist. It’s in poor taste and it is not good quality research.
This woman thinks marriage is incredibly important and healthy but she didn't want to allow gay people to get married. So what I'd like to do is take a giant shit right into her mouth. Please DM me if you know of a way to make this happen, otherwise please don't read this book. Andrew Sullivan wrote a book called VIRTUALLY NORMAL that is equally enthusiastic about marriage (which I think is a pretty rad institution if done right) and doesn't hate on the gays.
This is a very good, well-researched volume about marriage. I particulary appreciate it because many sociologists and demographers are turning their attention to alternative family forms. While these unions certainly merit attention by academics, Waite reminds us why marriage is important and good in our society.
Definitely a right-wing perspective on marriage and it's benefits to both the spouses and society. I did find the statistics very interesting though. Many of the "marital myths" are disspelled through 30+ year studies. If you're considering cohabitating vs. getting married, this book is worth reading to better help you understand the pros and cons of marriage.
If you can handle studies on marriage being explained and results recounted (obviously I don't mind that sort of thing), this book is good. It just feels good to read empirical data that being married is better than all the other options. You learn that marriage is about specialized skills and that is what makes it last in many cases.
Easy to read. This was required reading in a doctoral level course, but very interesting, and doesn't read like an academic book, although it does cite quite a bit of research, that any layman could understand.
A wealth of data, mainly based on the research of a University of Chicago sociologist, demythologizing many misconceptions surrounding marriage. Everything conventional wisdom tells us about marriage, cohabitation, and divorce is contradicted at every point by research data .
Anyone who wants to understand the importance of marriage must read this book. Waite and Gallagher fill this book with solid research to prove their case that marriage is superior to cohabitation. Highly recommended.
This is a great reference guide complete with the latest statistics and facts concerning marital satisfaction. Gallagher and Waite make a very logical point.
I loved this book! I rarely give out five stars... marriage is truly rewarding when both partners put in all their effort. Co-habitation is a cop-out. I recommend this book to everyone 16 and older!