Wonderful and hilarious story. Love. It. But needs editing
This is an amazingly fun tale, especially since it has such humble beginnings. I have also been following book 2 progress on the author's page. I only have 3 requests:
1) It could really use some professional or even amateur editing to fix formatting, grammar, and spelling errors. Especially in the first part of the book.
Many readers, upon encountering a lot of formatting and grammar errors in the beginning of a novel, will stop reading it and give bad reviews.
2) I would really like to know what happens with a particular paladin AFTER the events in this book.
3) Since you have now published, I think Amazon might help you, *ahem* "convince" the admins at webnovel to stop allowing IP thieves to post your work on their page for profit. Many other GameLit authors are also having similar problems with that site.
Note on editing: One of my favorite authors charges reasonable fees for professional editing service. She writes the "Vampire Files" books. Maybe give her a peek?