Where Are You

by Bella Donnis, Sally Bryan

ASIN moved from less recent edition here

Her first love disappeared...

Ten years later, a strange twist of fate forces a life-changing decision.

Surrounded by strangers at her Cambridge initiation, the chronically shy Erin suffers a panic attack in the middle of the atrium. Out of her depth, she decides to flee, University is not for her.

And that's when she blunders into a foreign student from Italy.

Gianna is confident, sassy and eccentric, everything Erin's not, and for some reason, she's taking the timid girl under her wing. But she has a secret, and it's one she can't even tell her new best friend.

It should never have happened, they were so different, yet unexpectedly, they fall in love.

Then Gianna disappears, breaking Erin's heart and throwing her back into a negative spiral of loss.

A decade later, the now Doctor Baker has moved on. Or so she thought.

When fate repeatedly conspires to remind Erin of her lost love, she must decide whether to risk destroying everything she's built to find her.

But after so long, will Gianna be happy to reconcile? Why did she disappear so suddenly? And why has Erin not heard from her since?

You'll adore this story of forbidden love, friendship and redemption because love has no time limit.

Get it now.

Genres: Romance, Lesbian, LGBT, Lesbian Romance, Femme Femme, Queer, Contemporary

382 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 30, 2014

About the author

Librarian note:
Starting from 2018 her books are published (and, in some case, re-published) as Sally Bryan

Bella Donnis took Creative Writing at the University of Cambridge, graduating in 2008. Since then she has worked as a content creator for various websites and publications. Now Bella predominantly writes her own books under her own name in the lesbian romance genre. She splits her time between Cambridge and Leeds where she lives with her partner and three dogs. (from the author's website)

Reviews

[P. Industry · Rating 4 out of 5]

Gina and Erin met each other on the first day at the University of Cambridge. Erin suffers from social anxiety, and finds it difficult to muster the strength to simply function in society. Regardless, she dreams of becoming a physiotherapist. Gina, a vivacious, friendly and patient Italian, goes out of her way to ease Erin’s fears that first day - they become fast friends, with Gina continuing to help Erin out of her shell. They go to class; they go to bars; they join the rowing club. Things are also moving in a, shall we say, romantic direction. But one day Gina is gone; literally up and gone without a single word to anyone.

Ten years later Erin is a respected professional, doing good work - and soon to be married to a man. She is also filled with doubt about these decisions. When a poem from an old textbook reminds her of her university days and her greatest love, she begins to ask herself - what happened to Gina? The rest of the novel follows the consequences of Erin deciding to find out.

This book is beautifully written; let’s get that out of the way first and foremost. The sections set in Italy are superb; the rowing races are dramatic and compelling; the allusions to the quantity of booze involved in an academic life are… well, they’re not wrong. It’s character driven, atmospheric, and everyone both exhibits and requests compassion. Erin is a flawed heroine, and is written to be so in a believable way – in fact all the characters are, which makes it far easier to relate to them. It’s the old chestnut; can I imagine this person being real?

Okay, so the book is worth reading; that’s the TL:DR version. But there are snags. There are, and I feel churlish saying this, problems with making the main character one with such severe social anxiety. By the very nature of the problem Erin is introduced as a boiling cauldron of negative stress, and this lasts a long time. Perhaps… the first 20% of the book? That’s actually a big chunk of text for a reader to power through while maintaining enough sympathy that the eventual triumph of her normal life is a joy and not an exhaustion. After all, books are driven by the relationships they create. And the first impressions we have of Erin’s interactions with others consist of them suggesting fun sounding things, and her (shrilly) saying no.

Obviously, this criticism is leaved by the knowledge that once the main characters become friends and Erin begins to develop as a person, the problems ease somewhat; it’s just this took so long I almost gave up in frustration.

There were also several moments in this book where I facepalmed heavily. Some of these were authorial choices - the one which instantly springs to my mind that the novel is introduced with a poem. This poem is referenced occasionally throughout the book, and its appearance prompts the introspection which forms the main tension in the novel. Alas for me, I couldn’t take that premise seriously - the poem was made of pure wangst and I cringed heavily as I read it.

Other facepalms were moree prompted by the actions of the characters themselves. Erin receives a proposal of marriage – a highly choreographed, incredibly public affair involving everyone in Erin’s family. To do this to someone with social anxiety appears breathtakingly cruel – but she says "yes", so what do I know? Erin in turn practices cruelty back; she clearly knows she’s going not going to marry this guy, but drags him around Italy on false pretences anyway. She’s on a quest to find her salacious lesbian ex-lover. He thinks they’re on a romantic holiday. See how those two things might not go together? Finally, the conspiracy theory regarding heroin and the Afghanistan War is totally crackers. I have no idea if the author just made it up or genuinely believes it, but it's lulu in loopyland while it's happening.

Overall though, this is a good book. It’s well written and reasonably entertaining. Four stars.

[Heinerway · Rating 2 out of 5]

I didn't like this book. It's not that the book is badly written or uninteresting or something. It's simply that I didn't click with the characters, and I also didn't figure out Gianna's decisions. On top of that, I'm not a fan of flashbacks.

[Alexis · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was a swing and a miss for me. Although I really liked Trapped and My Summer Romance I just didn't like this book for a multitude of reasons. The biggest one being its structure. The constant flashbacks coupled with it's super slow burn and love triangle only served to get on my nerves. The fact that the main characters are not very likable didn't help either.

The last thing that I was really disappointed by is the fact that all the authors books have the exact same formula. Woman/girl 1 is always in a relationship with a boy/man and ends up leaving him for woman/girl 2, who just happens to be Italian. I ended up skimming a lot in this book because the story got so predictable and the author found the need to include what happened to Erin's ex Ben who I really don't care about at all. I think after 3 books by this author I've had my fill!

[Kexx · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really enjoyed this but it took a while to get my head round it: the time line is all over the place - past, present, further past… But I really wanted to know how it finished. Recommended, if patient.

[Lady Olenna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m obsessed

There’s just something about university meet-cute, best friends to lovers to exes and trying to find their way back together that gives that perfect angsty feeling that makes my tummy hurt while reading. I love and hate the anxiety it brings.

Since I cancelled my subscription to a certain author who does New Adult romance pretty well but my unfounded biases are too strong to overlook it, I’m glad I found Sally Bryan to replace my New Adult fix.

Where Are You is your typical university romance with a past and present POV. I reckon Sally Bryan did a beautiful job with the story. I’ve only just found her and she’s now on my radar to read all her books.

[Ari · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5. needs a bit of editing :/

[Kathryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautiful love story. I enjoyed this very much. However, I would like to have seen more one-on-one time between the two main characters.

[Monique S.]

I did not finish this. The main character, Erin, just didn't make sense to me at all, while Gia was such a sunshine, she just sabotaged herself all the time, even mentioning time and again that she knew she was doing this to herself! One third of the book and no development towards proper awarness, not my cup of tea.

[Betty · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.75 * rounded up. 3* always means a good read for me. On the whole, the story is decent enough. For me, there are some errors of execution that would be solved by another editing pass. The jumping about in time - a flashback effect - failed at first because there is no signposting when they occur. That said, after the first few WTF is this, moments, it became easier. Especially when I knew who Ben was.

Typos, awkward phrases (honestly you say that the woman you love eats like a pig? and grabbing her flesh), overused phrases, and some headhopping etc., detracted the enjoyment of the story. But I did finish it.

[Sandra Johnson · Rating 1 out of 5]

Descent deserve any star

A gloomy depressant story , no pleasure gained from reading this at all, hated the main character, straight away, and she didn't improve !

[John B · Rating 4 out of 5]

I first read this book maybe 5 or 6 years ago and was reminded of it by another book. I was happy to find it on audible so bought it to listen to. The narration by Justine Eyre was fine. She did a good job to my ear with the various accents of the characters.

The book itself may show up as written by Sally Bryan or Bella Donnis. Bella Donnis was a pen name used by Bryan before she switched to publishing under her own name. The story follows Erin and Gia who meet as first year students at Cambridge University and switches between the current timeline and their freshman year. In current timeline Erin and Gia haven’t spoken in over ten years after Gia disappeared at the end of their first year. The flashbacks follow their first year meeting and romance. I’ve read the book a few times before getting the audio version and it’s aged well for me and I still enjoy it. Erin and Gia are interesting and well developed characters and easy to care about.

A minor content warning: Erin is in an on again/off again relationship with a man in the current scenes that depicts them kissing a few times and one breast grab by the man.

[MaxDisaster · Rating 2 out of 5]

Well, where to start... I'm dissapointed. The writig style with all the flashbacks confused me, the spelling errors annoyed me and no matter what, I just couldn't like the characters. So I managed to get through the first half and then decided I won't torture myself further. But from what I've read some people loved it, so...

[PelicanFreak · Rating 2 out of 5]

Really tried to get into this but it's just way too dull.
Do not recommend.

[Maurice · Rating 2 out of 5]

This had the potential to be a really beautiful romance, but it just kind of missed the mark for me in the end.
I liked the writing and the setting of the story, although I think there could have been done a little bit more with the setting.
The backflash chapters were really good, but I didn't care for the present storyline at all. Unfortunately the backlflashes stop halfway through the book, so that was when the story went downhill for me.
I hated Ben with a passion, and I also thought both Gia and Erin had changed for the worse in the ten years that had passed between the two storylines.
There wasn't enough relationship development in the present storyline either. I think after how the other storyline ended, I would have needed to see so much more of the characters getting close to each other again. The way it was, I didn't buy into the ending of the book at all.
It also seemed as if the book wasn't aware of the fact that there are bi- and pansexual people. Erin never considered that she could be attracted to more than one gender, she was basically like "I like women so that automatically makes me a lesbian". On top of that there was a point where Ben knew another character couldn't be a lesbian because she had a child (at least I think that was his reasoning for this conclusion, it wasn't 100% clear, but it seemed to me like it was meant this way), which just doesn't make sense.
I own another book by this author, which I think I will give a shot eventually, but this one wasn't for me at all.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book, I know other reviewers have spoken about not liking the way the book jumps forward and back but I felt the opposite. I liked that a moment or event during Erin's current life brought her back to a memory from her past. I felt it helped the story to develop and me to understand how Erin got to where she was.

The book is well written, the strong relationship between the two main characters is obvious and well developed. Each flashback gets you more and more invested in Erin and Gia's relationship, from their first meeting to the rowing race.

There were a few reasons this book didn't quite get the five stars from me. I won't give away any spoilers but I felt Gia's decisions where questionable... Also I would have preferred if the epilogue had jumped forward a bit more.

Overall it's a good read and won't be the last book I read from this author

[Alicia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Okay Story

I couldn't get into this story due to the back in forth. one minute you were in the present themselves all of sudden you were back in the past. I would have rather read about the the background first then move into the present day when the two characters finally meet again.

[Conrad Phillips · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved Where Are You. You're taken along on a journey with the main character and you share her desire to know what happened to her first love.

[Lori Renee · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read 65 pages of this book and it could not grab my interest at all. It was torturous trying to read through enough of it for it to finally get good. Very disappointing.

[Petrina Binney · Rating 3 out of 5]

A story of lost love, Where Are You, follows chronically-shy, Cambridge physiotherapy student, Erin, and her burgeoning friendship with Italian firecracker, Gia.

When Erin’s anxiety sees her almost fleeing before the first lecture, it’s Gia’s explosive entrance and ready smile that convinces her to move forwards. Within months, the pair are drinking in bars, making friends and rowing for their college.

But when Erin realises she has feelings for her lesbian friend, she gets very lost. Gia is her only friend, and Erin lacks the self-esteem to think that she has any reason to hope. But after a major rowing victory and a night together, Gia disappears, leaving Erin to pick up the pieces.

Ten years and an engagement later, Erin is on her way to Italy, but will she find Gia, or will she learn to be happy with fiancé Ben?

The story is really well thought through. I really enjoyed getting to know the characters, especially charming, Scottish brothers - Mikey and Scruffy.

The shift in the women, from forthright to downcast, and from introverted to confident, was intriguing and very well-observed. The dialogue was crackling, by turns humorous and heartfelt. I loved Gia from the get-go. I think everyone needs a friend like her.

Some of the writing could have done with a clean-up. There were a few missing words, shifts in tense, and run-on sentences which I had to go back and reread to ensure I’d got the hang of what was happening. During the story, we spend a lot of time inside the character’s heads, which slowed the pacing a bit, there was quite a lot of information dumping in the early chapters. Also, this line threw me completely…

(Of Cambridge)
“To think some of the world’s best; Newton, Darwin and Hawkins might have gathered to chat or eat at the exact same spot.”
Forlorn, Chapter Two, Where Are You by Sally Bryan

If there’s a Hawkins I’ve forgotten about, then I offer my sincere apologies but I suspected the author was referring to Stephen Hawking and my eyes rolled all on their own.

That said, it was a good story and I enjoyed it.

[Brian's Book Blog · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bryan Kept The Tension Throughout

I will give Where Are You credit – the amount of times I thought to myself “are they really going to end up together?” First because it just didn’t seem like it was going to happen – then later on because it felt like everything was keeping them apart. I can definitely give Bryan credit here. She did a fantastic job of keeping the tension there and ever-present throughout almost the entire book.

Where Are You was one of those books that if it had gone a different way I probably would have hated. But I think that Bryan was able to embellish on the realism enough that it worked. There were a few scenes (later in the book) where even I was like “really?” but, they only appeared a few times and didn’t take away from the book.

The two main characters were pretty much opposites, but the irony was the shift that happens from the beginning to the end of the book. Bryan is able to write these characters and grow them in such a way that they start off as one person and end up as another (while still being fundamentally the same person if that makes sense). She shows was growing up does to people. What it does to relationships. And what it does when you stop putting your health and well-being first.

I enjoyed this one and found myself smiling throughout it – even at the parts that stressed me out. Bryan kept me interested and definitely wrote a book that felt real. The love in it felt appropriate and was definitely something that they had to try for.

The narration by Justine Eyre was perfect for this book. She had the right voice and the right accents for each character. I thought her narration added a bit of warmth to the book, even during some of the colder scenes.

This one reminded me a bit of some of the other books I’ve read in this genre, especially The Roommate Arrangement by Jae.

[AC · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a difficult review to write. Where to begin? I guess first thing, I rounded up to 3 stars because the story plot was interesting.

The story is divided into three sections. I found the first section frustrating as it felt like hit hopped from past to present time without a smooth transition. I don’t know if this is the author’s first published book, but I’m not sure I’d read another one.

It isn’t that the plot or characters were not enjoyable, they mostly were, but I just couldn’t find a rhythm to the story. And I basically skipped through one chapter as it didn’t move the story forward at all. I’m not sure why it was included. No spoilers, because you might feel differently.

But my experience might be totally different from anyone else’s. Don’t be put off by mine. The story plot and characters were intriguing, perhaps they will be for you as well. Just sayin’.

[Ms Mary E Doyle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cambridge & Napoli what a backdrop

The story of two women students realising that they are sculpting their lives around each other but skirting the growing attraction & love. One night of passion
Leads to the time slipping through their fingers.

Ten years later in Napoli, for one life had been all too hard & her spirit was broken.Then an accident brought home how much they meant to it other.

But time had to heal them apart for time for them to realise they should never been apart.

[Bill · Rating 5 out of 5]

The reviews are true - so enjoyable

This is my first book by this author and I will definitely be looking for more from her.
If you want simple easy meet-cute, no drama, straightforward and a HEA, this is NOT for you.
The author has created a story with layered flawed characters making mistakes, living with the consequences and then trying again anyway. Much like life really, but of course life doesn’t guarantee the HEA.

[charles clayson · Rating 5 out of 5]

💥💖AMAZING💖💥
I first just set my voice to text, and listened to this e-book. But before I could fall asleep. I heard enough of the story that convinced me. That I definitely wanted to read this book.
And boy am I glad I did.
One of my favorite endings. They realize where they belong.

[Tanyia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Here

Started slow, but really finished strong. I love that these two women get a second chance at loving each other, but also themselves. Honestly, if you could cast aside every fear, and just go for it, where would you be?

[Rachel Crosby · Rating 4 out of 5]

First half very good, second half not so

This novel is about two young women, one English and one Italian, struggling to find a way to be with each other. They don't face external issues so much as internal ones. Up to about the middle of the book, the story is very good and believable. After that it really becomes implausible and difficult to read. The ending is great, however

[Steffi · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved the first half of this book then I sadly lost interest after dinner dance scene and DNF'ed the book not long after this.
The characters and landscape of Cambridge did come alive on the page and I will read more by this writer.

[Gail North · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent

It was a heart felt good read about love and the obstacles that can happen. Eventually love conquers all . brilliant from start to finish ☺

[Ashley · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think I read this one before, and both times it was okay... I think this author is just not my cup of tea for some reason.

[Ree Soto · Rating 5 out of 5]

VERY SWEET

This was a beautiful love story. For me it was a bit wordy but, I still enjoyed it very much.