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Men Too: Unspoken Truths About Male Sexual Abuse
Male sexual abuse occurs far more commonly than previously suspected, yet too few victims ever seek support. Countless remain silent. They cope through avoidance, isolation, substance abuse, hyper-masculinity, etc.
Men Unspoken Truths About Male Sexual Abuse is for male survivors and their supporters. It is an educational, heart-wrenching look at 13 male sexual abuse victims experience, written from the perspective of a retired police officer and registered psychologist.
Using their narrative accounts Dr. Palfy
Conversations about male sexual abuse need to increase. Men Too highlights the complex and unique barriers boys and men face during and after abuse. Help put them on the road to recovery.
Men Unspoken Truths About Male Sexual Abuse is for male survivors and their supporters. It is an educational, heart-wrenching look at 13 male sexual abuse victims experience, written from the perspective of a retired police officer and registered psychologist.
Using their narrative accounts Dr. Palfy
Conversations about male sexual abuse need to increase. Men Too highlights the complex and unique barriers boys and men face during and after abuse. Help put them on the road to recovery.
200 pages, Paperback
Published January 15, 2020
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Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
April 16, 2023
This book is about the considerable difficulties men and boys have in recognizing, understanding, disclosing and recovering from sexual abuse.
An estimated one in six men/boys are victims of sexual abuse.
Tragically, 30 to 80% of male sexual abuse survivors never disclose their abuse out of concern that they will be stigmatized, or viewed with suspicion, or entangled in re-traumatizing legal processes, or out of shame, or false sense of culpability, or to protect their family and/or their perpetrator.
Additionally, given the lack of awareness and lack of public discourse on the subject, many male victims simply do not understand that what they experienced was in fact sexual abuse. As such, they suffer in silent shame, or confusion, and do not get the treatment and recovery they so badly need.
This book is a major step in the right direction. If you are a male sexual abuse survivor. Or if you feel like you may have been sexually abused, but you’re just not sure. This book may be an important first step on your journey to recovery.
TRIGGER WARNING:
I typically don’t include trigger warnings. In fact, I’m sort of apposed to them. I think they promote a kind of fearful avoidance of difficult subjects. But I’m going to include a trigger warning for this book. The material in it is extremely strong, very graphic, very intense, and very disturbing.
JESUS ALERT:
The books author, Dr. Kelli Palfy is Christian, and the final chapter has a very brief discussion on reconciling issues of Christian faith and male sexual abuse. If you’re a Christian you may find this reassuring. If you’re not, you may find this off putting. I personally found the Christian messaging to be mild and minimally intrusive. So please don’t don’t let this scare you away from the book. It’s like 99% secular.
I highly recommend this book. But (as previously mentioned) it is HEAVY, so please practice self care, exercise appropriate caution, and absolutely get the support you need.
This is a very powerful, very intense book on a really important, and rarely discussed topic.
5/5 ⭐️s
An estimated one in six men/boys are victims of sexual abuse.
Tragically, 30 to 80% of male sexual abuse survivors never disclose their abuse out of concern that they will be stigmatized, or viewed with suspicion, or entangled in re-traumatizing legal processes, or out of shame, or false sense of culpability, or to protect their family and/or their perpetrator.
Additionally, given the lack of awareness and lack of public discourse on the subject, many male victims simply do not understand that what they experienced was in fact sexual abuse. As such, they suffer in silent shame, or confusion, and do not get the treatment and recovery they so badly need.
This book is a major step in the right direction. If you are a male sexual abuse survivor. Or if you feel like you may have been sexually abused, but you’re just not sure. This book may be an important first step on your journey to recovery.
TRIGGER WARNING:
I typically don’t include trigger warnings. In fact, I’m sort of apposed to them. I think they promote a kind of fearful avoidance of difficult subjects. But I’m going to include a trigger warning for this book. The material in it is extremely strong, very graphic, very intense, and very disturbing.
JESUS ALERT:
The books author, Dr. Kelli Palfy is Christian, and the final chapter has a very brief discussion on reconciling issues of Christian faith and male sexual abuse. If you’re a Christian you may find this reassuring. If you’re not, you may find this off putting. I personally found the Christian messaging to be mild and minimally intrusive. So please don’t don’t let this scare you away from the book. It’s like 99% secular.
I highly recommend this book. But (as previously mentioned) it is HEAVY, so please practice self care, exercise appropriate caution, and absolutely get the support you need.
This is a very powerful, very intense book on a really important, and rarely discussed topic.
5/5 ⭐️s
April 5, 2020
A must read for those who support male sexual abuse survivors. Explains difficult topics in an enlightening way. If you are new to survival then this is an excellent starting point.
September 21, 2021
Dr. Kelli Palfey has written a masterful account of male sexual assault in childhood, the first in many years, and one of only a handful since Mike Lew’s “Victims No Longer” was first published in 1990.
Male sexual abuse is an epidemic. One in every 6 boys is sexually abused by the age of 16. The personal and emotional toll is staggering, as are economic and social consequences, including lost productivity and health care costs.
She interviewed 13 survivors to expertly describe the effects on victims, including conversion disorders, disassociation, normalization, and substance abuse, to name but a few. The effects are often multiple and reinforcing. The cases are real, using pseudonyms and no personal information that might disclose identities. They are not exaggerated or embellished, and frequently harrowing.
She examines the seemingly inexplicable behavior of many victims: Why do they continue a relationship with an abuser when they are older, and even when abuse is still taking place? Why do so few ever disclose the abuse? And why do most disclosures take place years, even decades, after the abuse has ended? The answers are complex, with many factors unique to each individual, ranging from “no one would believe me” to “I wanted to protect my family. “
She concludes with useful chapters on identifying behaviors in children which may indicate sexual abuse and prevention strategies to protect them. From someone who has been researching a book on the dynamics of unchecked child abuse that occurred over many decades at an institution, I found “ME^N TOO” insightful and compelling.
Male sexual abuse is an epidemic. One in every 6 boys is sexually abused by the age of 16. The personal and emotional toll is staggering, as are economic and social consequences, including lost productivity and health care costs.
She interviewed 13 survivors to expertly describe the effects on victims, including conversion disorders, disassociation, normalization, and substance abuse, to name but a few. The effects are often multiple and reinforcing. The cases are real, using pseudonyms and no personal information that might disclose identities. They are not exaggerated or embellished, and frequently harrowing.
She examines the seemingly inexplicable behavior of many victims: Why do they continue a relationship with an abuser when they are older, and even when abuse is still taking place? Why do so few ever disclose the abuse? And why do most disclosures take place years, even decades, after the abuse has ended? The answers are complex, with many factors unique to each individual, ranging from “no one would believe me” to “I wanted to protect my family. “
She concludes with useful chapters on identifying behaviors in children which may indicate sexual abuse and prevention strategies to protect them. From someone who has been researching a book on the dynamics of unchecked child abuse that occurred over many decades at an institution, I found “ME^N TOO” insightful and compelling.
October 6, 2021
Read this one for work. Really hard to get through but worth it.
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews