Pass with Care

by Cooper Lee Bombardier

In this funny, lyrical, and piercingly insightful collection of essays and poems, trans writer, artist, and activist Cooper Lee Bombardier explores his experiences of gender and sexuality against the backdrop of early '90s, punk-fueled San Francisco queer culture.

Genres: Memoir, Essays, Queer, LGBT, Nonfiction, Transgender, Biography

240 pages, Hardcover

First published June 9, 2020

About the author

Cooper Lee Bombardier (he/him/his), author of PASS WITH CARE: MEMOIRS, finalist for the CLMP 2021 Firecracker Award in Nonfiction, is a queer and trans writer and visual artist from the South Shore of Boston. His writing appears in The Kenyon Review, The Malahat Review, CutBank, Narratively, Nailed Magazine, Longreads, Ninth Letter, and The Rumpus; and recently in the Lambda Literary Award-winning anthology The Remedy–Essays on Queer Health Issues, (ed. Zena Sharman) and Meanwhile, Elsewhere: Speculative Fiction From Transgender Writers, (eds. Cat Fitzpatrick and Casey Plett), winner of the American Library Association Barbara Gittings Literature Award and a Lambda Literary Award nominee. The Huffington Post named him as one of “10 Transgender Artists Who Are Changing The Landscape Of Contemporary Art.” A veteran of the original Sister Spit tours, he's performed, lectured, taught, and exhibited across North America. His first book, Pass With Care: Memoirs is available from Dottir Press. https://www.dottirpress.com/pass-with... Visit him at www.cooperleebombardier.com FB: cooperfrickinleee Twitter: @CooperLeeB IG: cooper_lee_bombardier

Reviews

[Maia · Rating 4 out of 5]

An extremely strong collection of memoir essays, centered on themes of queer community, gender transition, reckoning with white masculinity, being a working class artist, relationships, trauma, healing, and accountability. Two short pieces about childhood, "Lincoln Street" and "Boombox", ached with the feeling of the last period of freedom before the full onslaught of gender policing and puberty. Many of the pieces provided a window to a specific queer moment in San Francisco in the 1990s, when punk artist collectives could still afford rent and run wild through the city. Bombardier also writes about working in traditionally masculine spaces, in carpentry, in welding, in construction, and as a college campus security guard. I enjoyed the nonlinear organization of the pieces in this book, and I highlighted several lines which I know I will be thinking about for a long time.

[River Crabbe · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of those books which I found at just the right time, amidst so many interior questions about masculinity, being trans, being a trans buddhist (sorta). Cooper's writing is so clear while also being nuanced and it made space for me to explore so many of my questions as I read his own reflections. I finished this last night feeling deeply appreciative...and wanting to write fanmail!

[Cooper Lee Bombardier · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't wait to see what this author writes next!

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This collection of essays spans a long swath of trans time, offering some historicizing of SF and NM in the 90s and early oughts, including dyke/transmasc tensions and a reckoning with past relationships and an inheritance of familial violence. Honestly so much here, a lot of life lived and hard-won lessons learned. The essay on accountability and problematic accountability processes was probably my favorite; I loved a lot else too—the essay on new trans memoir is terrific. Much clear-sighted wisdom to be found here and Bombardier’s image-rich writing is humbly excellent.

[Felix Maclean · Rating 5 out of 5]

An absolute joy to read this collection of essays where I both saw fragments of my own experiences and insights into worlds I’ve only heard about in snatches. The writing is gorgeous, lush imagery that holds the attention and leaves you longing for more while remaining an accessible read. Loved it!

[Laura Sackton · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is a wide range of essays in this collection, some short vignettes, others much longer. In general I found the longer, more introspective pieces more compelling than the shorter ones, but overall this was a moving book about transness, masculinity, queer communities, work. I appreciated the way they spanned time, moving through various parts of Bombardier's life. I also really loved the way the book was structured, the essays moved around in time, rather than forward in a linear way. It gave the collection a sense of messiness and movement. Much of what Bombardier writes about is the messiness of transition, the ability to hold many truths and identities within a body, both the easing into self and the pain of not being at ease in self. I especially loved the essays about trans memoir and the act of writing. There's also an essay in which he addresses his own past abusive behavior, and the ways that played out in the small queer community where he lived--it was a poignant and powerful look at the harm communities, especially queer communities, can do, and the possibilities for new ways to embody healing, accountability, forgiveness.

[Kenneth Haggett · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful series of trans-masc memoirs, detailing struggles in searching for identity while resisting structural gender norms associated with both the body and gender expression. The memoirs serve as, in some places, quite subversive, challenging discursive notions of what is considered true or “normal” in particular situations (see The Fourth Level). Overall, brilliantly done 🫰🏻

[AGMaynard]

Well done! Memoir, essay/reportage, performance, poem. From the last paragraph: “Our duty as trans people writing memoir in this time is to resist and reject narrative forms and chronologies that limit the diversity of our multivalent bodies and lives. For this to work, we have to write fearlessly and non-didactically, and expect our non-trans readers to grab a handrail and to hold on for the ride.” Recommmended!

[Tucker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautiful craft. I appreciate the difficulty and complexity of the subject matter. Bombardier explores the subtlety of years spent as "passing" inconsistently as a man or a woman, as being perceived by other queer people to have an ambiguous or complicated gender, and of making the effort to establish himself physically and socially as a man — but without entirely rejecting the meaning and legacy of the experiences that came before.

A personal journey affects one's chosen community, and these discussions blend. Queer community has always knit around the challenging parts of individual experience. If, due to social progress, these specific challenges eventually fade or change in nature, what will it then mean to belong to queer community? Bombardier leaves it open-ended, a question that belongs to the future.

The penultimate essay, "The Fourth Level," is about trauma, abuse, misunderstanding, and restitution. It has hard-won insights with a clear-headed perspective, and it challenges all of us to think about how we act and react and how we judge others.

[McKenzie Wark · Rating 5 out of 5]

So many good pieces in this collection, but I'll just single out 'A Trans Body's Path in Eight Folds' as for me it really opens up ways of thinking and feeling and writing about the trans body that we need. Its framed as a series of statements about "a trans body," usefully singular. Getting outside of the declarative statements that try to sweep all of us into their casual embrace. And yet that locution allows so many ways to find ones way into the experiences it delineates.

[Chris]

Showed me pieces of an experience very different from my own. The writing is so good, poetic in some breathtaking stretches. Every essay was thought provoking; Cooper seems like someone who would always ask plenty of questions. His is a life lived curiously, always pondering, probing, looking for the meaning behind the meaning. But, given the difficulty of the journey, this isn’t a purely intellectual account. It is deeply moving as well.

[Simon · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book I felt I ought to want, ought to admire, and there's a lot of good, useful stuff in there... but mostly I felt the lessons were ones I was getting elsewhere and the language didn't particularly speak to me, so not a book I needed to keep as reference nor particularly wanted the energy of.

But what a change from five years ago even, that there are enough trans-masc memoirs to not feel beholden to each and every one of them.

[Shea · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't remember the last time I read a memoir/essay collection where I could still be feel the electricity in my finger tips long after putting the book down. I will love this book until end of time.

[Tat · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for the LGBTQA+ community. I picked this up because I wanted to hear an older voice from the community. I love the author's writing. Really beautiful. I kind of wish they wrote fiction too because I love their descriptive language.

[Charlotte · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such a good memoir with so many great lines I would like imprinted on my soul

[Sabrina Chapadjiev · Rating 5 out of 5]

'Pass with Care' is a really lovely, collection of essays that explore what 'passing' means and meant to Cooper Lee Bombardier. It's an interesting book, a collection jammed with essays that fluctuate from lyrical to academic and from interviews to meditations. It's a bit unbalanced at times in terms of timeline narrative, as it starts out with Bombardier's experiences as a kid and then quickly jumps to their adult experiences, but that patchwork hopscotches throughout the veiled narrative, sort of like a trauma victim trying to stitch their life together.

What I think is most important about this book is how it really does capture the transitionary period of the '90s, where being trans was still such a rare, solitary, and silent journey. Bombardier points to this transition easily, not only in his interview with Susan Stryker and Jordy Jones where they talk about how the internet allowed trans communities to blossom safely under a veil of physical safety but also in his both frustration and admiration for people who are beginning their journey, both incredulous and in awe of their intolerance of micro-aggressions, a luxury most trans elders weren't able to afford.

This is a great glimpse into that transitionary period before trans issues hit the mainstream, how trauma affects communities, the wicked genius of the San Francisco queer scene, and one lone soul's attempt to unravel into their true selves.

Lots to learn here, and a great place for any reader to unravel their own prejudices, traumas, and possibilities.

[Jack · Rating 5 out of 5]

A good hurt, this one

[Jenny Forrester]

The brilliant heart-loving Bombardier is such a gift. This book is, too. Pass with Care is love. Kindness. Revolution.

[Ezran Page]

I had to DNF this. I started skimming through almost immediately.

I think I'm just not a fan of the writing style and just wasn't in the mood for another memoir. With all the good reviews I think I just need to leave it for another time.

I'll pick it back up one day.

[mickey · Rating 5 out of 5]

wow what an exceptional collection! extremely beautiful, intimate, and personal. it means a lot that i was able to read this during my current transitory period, this collection has given me a lot of confidence and solidarity that i was really lacking. love!!

[Rebecca H.]

Pass with Care is a memoir in essays about Cooper Lee Bombadier’s experiences as a trans man. The pieces describe what masculinity means to him and how he moved toward his transition. He writes about what it’s like to be mistaken for a cis man and his complicated feelings toward younger generations of LGBTQ+ people. His life is fascinating to read about: he was a part of the queer scene in 1990s San Francisco, is an artist and performer, worked as a construction worker and security guard, and has lived in many different places and among many types of people. These essays are personal, honest, and sensitive, and full of valuable insights into gender and masculinity.

https://bookriot.com/summer-indie-pre...

[edward dimarzio · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is beautifully written and brings awareness to life’s many details many of us never considered.

[Anna Roamer · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book is a must read for everyone. But even more so for the relatives, friends and siblings of trans children. And even more so for the parents of trans children who consider themselves allies and are supportive of their children. The narratives will gently nudge you to reflect a bit deeper. While reading, at times, your eyes might water, your heart might constrict in horror, and at times, you will laugh out loud. After reading the book, you will know Cooper Lee Bombardier personally, like you know an old friend without him knowing anything about you. That's how sincere, open, courageous and vulnerable his writing is. And did I mention that his writing is super sensual, too?
I can't wait for the next publication.

[Skylar · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you want to know what’s going on in a trans-masc’s mind, Pass With Care sums it up. The subjects of each chapter-essay range from abstract, to almost-too topical, at times uncomfortable- Altogether a beautifully balanced collection. Conversational & introspective. A trans man’s “Detransition, Baby”.

[Akiva ꙮ · Rating 3 out of 5]

The last essay is on how trans memoir needs to evolve, and he's very right about that! This one isn't as far along as that unfortunately.

[Andrew]

As recommended at https://twitter.com/nonoletmegetit/st...

[Erin Pollard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cooper's writing is glorious, the type of writing where you stop after a paragraph and MUST read it aloud to someone you love just to share his genius if only for a moment. "Pass with Care" is an epiphany for those of us who are cis and straight, providing the much-needed gut-punch that is infused with humour, truth, and an intelligence that I aspire to but will never achieve. Cooper is not afraid to drag you through the mud to understand themes of identity, grief, friendship, love and all the ugliness in between. After somehow losing his book, I bought it again so I could go back to it, bookended on my shelves amongst the authors I so admire.

[Sue Foley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this at Dottir Press. Reading this book was as restorative as a three pint, five hour marathon hang with a bestie in the local pub. Full of entertaining jokes, illuminating analysis, muted sorrow, sustained meaningful connection. I binged it in three days, only pausing for sleep and work.

[Gabe Dulecki]

I'm bored lmaooooo I'm sure this book is great but I've renewed it twice and just haven't read even half of it. I have so many other books right now that I'm simply not excited about this one. I think if I have a slower reading moment that I would come back to this

[Flungoutofspace (Chris) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Smart, tender, eloquent and relatable in so many ways.