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His Only Wife
“Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding.”
Afi Tekple is a young seamstress whose life is narrowing rapidly. She lives in a small town in Ghana with her widowed mother, spending much of her time in her uncle Pious’s house with his many wives and children. Then one day she is offered a life-changing opportunity—a proposal of marriage from the wealthy family of Elikem Ganyo, a man she doesn’t truly know. She acquiesces, but soon realizes that Elikem is not quite the catch he seemed. He sends a stand-in to his own wedding, and only weeks after Afi is married and installed in a plush apartment in the capital city of Accra does she meet her new husband. It turns out that he is in love with another woman, whom his family disapproves of; Afi is supposed to win him back on their behalf. But it is Accra that eventually wins Afi’s heart and gives her a life of independence that she never could have imagined for herself.
A brilliant scholar and a fierce advocate for women’s rights, author Peace Adzo Medie infuses her debut novel with intelligence and humor. For readers of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and Candice Carty-Williams, His Only Wife is the story of an indomitable and relatable heroine that illuminates what it means to be a woman in a rapidly changing world.
Afi Tekple is a young seamstress whose life is narrowing rapidly. She lives in a small town in Ghana with her widowed mother, spending much of her time in her uncle Pious’s house with his many wives and children. Then one day she is offered a life-changing opportunity—a proposal of marriage from the wealthy family of Elikem Ganyo, a man she doesn’t truly know. She acquiesces, but soon realizes that Elikem is not quite the catch he seemed. He sends a stand-in to his own wedding, and only weeks after Afi is married and installed in a plush apartment in the capital city of Accra does she meet her new husband. It turns out that he is in love with another woman, whom his family disapproves of; Afi is supposed to win him back on their behalf. But it is Accra that eventually wins Afi’s heart and gives her a life of independence that she never could have imagined for herself.
A brilliant scholar and a fierce advocate for women’s rights, author Peace Adzo Medie infuses her debut novel with intelligence and humor. For readers of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and Candice Carty-Williams, His Only Wife is the story of an indomitable and relatable heroine that illuminates what it means to be a woman in a rapidly changing world.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published September 1, 2020
2269 people are currently reading
42021 people want to read
About the author
Peace Adzo Medie
4 books574 followersPeace Adzo Medie is a Ghanaian writer and senior lecturer in gender and international politics at the University of Bristol in England. Prior to that she was a research fellow at the University of Ghana. She has published several short stories, and her book Global Norms and Local Action: The Campaigns to End Violence Against Women in Africa was published by Oxford University Press in 2020. She is an award-winning scholar and has been awarded several fellowships. She holds a PhD in public and international affairs from the University of Pittsburgh and a BA in geography from the University of Ghana. She was born in Liberia.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 3,805 reviews
July 7, 2022
I was never bored while reading this, but as soon as I finished I wondered how I was not constantly bored.
I mean, yes, this book supplied me with a sort of figurative IV of drama, a constant drip of tea that offered me restorative health benefits, a steady stream of scandal the likes of which I want every single conversation I have to take inspiration from.
But I didn't care much about the characters. You'd think that should make a difference, because who wants juicy details about the lives of people they don't know or take interest in?
Turns out, me.
This is the literary equivalent of a friend of a friend telling you a two-hour story about people you don't know. And while that wasn't boring, it was like...I'd prefer if someone else were telling me this? Or maybe if I was having a different conversation.
Bottom line: I could say something about the clear and straightforward writing style, or how this somehow felt both too long and too short, or probably a bunch of other stuff, but what it comes down to is I'm nosy.
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currently-reading updates
the most appealing thing a book can be is under 300 pages. i don't make the rules
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tbr review
i have officially received word that it is my curse to want to read everything compared to Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
I mean, yes, this book supplied me with a sort of figurative IV of drama, a constant drip of tea that offered me restorative health benefits, a steady stream of scandal the likes of which I want every single conversation I have to take inspiration from.
But I didn't care much about the characters. You'd think that should make a difference, because who wants juicy details about the lives of people they don't know or take interest in?
Turns out, me.
This is the literary equivalent of a friend of a friend telling you a two-hour story about people you don't know. And while that wasn't boring, it was like...I'd prefer if someone else were telling me this? Or maybe if I was having a different conversation.
Bottom line: I could say something about the clear and straightforward writing style, or how this somehow felt both too long and too short, or probably a bunch of other stuff, but what it comes down to is I'm nosy.
------------------
currently-reading updates
the most appealing thing a book can be is under 300 pages. i don't make the rules
------------------
tbr review
i have officially received word that it is my curse to want to read everything compared to Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
August 31, 2020
I have mixed feelings about this contemporary African story about love, marriage, culture and what it means to be the perfect daughter, wife and to “keep your home.” The premise is that Afi, is a young seamstress from a rural town in Ghana who wins the proverbial lottery when she’s selected by her family’s wealthy benefactors to marry their favourite son, Eli, who’s involved with a woman they do not approve of. Afi’s task as the new (traditionally-wed, family-approved) wife is to divert Eli’s attentions from the “Jezebel” who’s stolen him away from his family. I was intrigued by this African film industry premise and excited to check it out. The idea was not at all unrealistic to me as I’ve seen similar things play out in real life although not quite with people as cosmopolitanly urbane but I’m not disputing the plausibility.
It was a little hard to "like" any of the characters in this book because some of them were a little trope-y but for me which was fine, I don't mind a trope- but they never quite managed to break through from the shell. I really struggled with Afi’s youthful naïveté. I struggled to “buy” the deep-seated love relationship between she and Eli, especially since she went in with eyes open knowing full well there was another woman involved in the mix. Therefore, it seemed a little out of place later when she made it seem like she was being cheated on when she came in as the latter day entrant to the “polygamous” relationship. It didn't really make sense to me as she was built up as knowing the situation beforehand and so, I’m not quite sure what her endgame or expectations were but as a reader, it didn’t feel realistic to me. Again, to be charitable, Afi IS quite young at 21 and also quite inexperienced, so perhaps that plays a role in her characterization and behaviour.
Plot-wise to me, there were a few holes and I had questions but not enough that I couldn’t understand what was happening or go with the flow. I just I suppose didn’t get the direction of the book and don’t really understand what it wanted to accomplish. When we were introduced to Yaya’s friends, I expected more to come from that nugget to create dramatic effect. The building of tension between Afi’s family and the Ganyos was fabulous, I only wish more had been done with that potential plot angle. The author was great at creating potential opportunities for tension but she often just releases them without exploring further or stoking the flames so there were lots of moments were my expectations for more drama were built and then allowed to fall flat. The resolution and the conflicts felt a little too easily achieved when a book such as this was BEGGING for more dramatic effect.
What was good about this was the writing- it was engaging and breezy, delightfully readable and evocative of the emotions and images the author was trying to convey. It was the literary equivalent of an old-school Ghollywood movie and I was absolutely here for that. The descriptions of contemporary Ghanaian life and African Aunties and Uncles was absolutely spot on. I’m not Ghanaian but I am West African with my own African Aunties and Uncles in the village and I recognized them one hundred percent in authenticity. I loved the observations about city life and city yuppies and the descriptions of the lifestyles, people and places both in the rural and urban areas. This author is sharp and witty in her observations bringing laugh out loud humor to an otherwise frustrating story. I liked the exploration of the themes of money and love which are really pertinent in the global (and African) sugar baby culture. I thought the portrayal of grown, successful men still being controlled by their families was timely as was the incredibly problematic but still very current trend of families selling their daughters into potentially toxic relationships because out of financial need. I thought the advice and opinions of the elders, friends, and cosmopolitan neighbors was a realistic reflection of what actually happens and what would actually be said in these situations.
I thought that overall, this was fine and was a good enough debut but I wish the author had really taken it “there” with this book. It was begging for more real conflict and more drama that matched the excellence of the set up. As it is, this is a good story about contemporary polygamous relationships and arranged marriages with modern couples in West Africa and one young woman’s courageous journey to discovering her boundaries with love and relationships.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from Algonquin Books.
It was a little hard to "like" any of the characters in this book because some of them were a little trope-y but for me which was fine, I don't mind a trope- but they never quite managed to break through from the shell. I really struggled with Afi’s youthful naïveté. I struggled to “buy” the deep-seated love relationship between she and Eli, especially since she went in with eyes open knowing full well there was another woman involved in the mix. Therefore, it seemed a little out of place later when she made it seem like she was being cheated on when she came in as the latter day entrant to the “polygamous” relationship. It didn't really make sense to me as she was built up as knowing the situation beforehand and so, I’m not quite sure what her endgame or expectations were but as a reader, it didn’t feel realistic to me. Again, to be charitable, Afi IS quite young at 21 and also quite inexperienced, so perhaps that plays a role in her characterization and behaviour.
Plot-wise to me, there were a few holes and I had questions but not enough that I couldn’t understand what was happening or go with the flow. I just I suppose didn’t get the direction of the book and don’t really understand what it wanted to accomplish. When we were introduced to Yaya’s friends, I expected more to come from that nugget to create dramatic effect. The building of tension between Afi’s family and the Ganyos was fabulous, I only wish more had been done with that potential plot angle. The author was great at creating potential opportunities for tension but she often just releases them without exploring further or stoking the flames so there were lots of moments were my expectations for more drama were built and then allowed to fall flat. The resolution and the conflicts felt a little too easily achieved when a book such as this was BEGGING for more dramatic effect.
What was good about this was the writing- it was engaging and breezy, delightfully readable and evocative of the emotions and images the author was trying to convey. It was the literary equivalent of an old-school Ghollywood movie and I was absolutely here for that. The descriptions of contemporary Ghanaian life and African Aunties and Uncles was absolutely spot on. I’m not Ghanaian but I am West African with my own African Aunties and Uncles in the village and I recognized them one hundred percent in authenticity. I loved the observations about city life and city yuppies and the descriptions of the lifestyles, people and places both in the rural and urban areas. This author is sharp and witty in her observations bringing laugh out loud humor to an otherwise frustrating story. I liked the exploration of the themes of money and love which are really pertinent in the global (and African) sugar baby culture. I thought the portrayal of grown, successful men still being controlled by their families was timely as was the incredibly problematic but still very current trend of families selling their daughters into potentially toxic relationships because out of financial need. I thought the advice and opinions of the elders, friends, and cosmopolitan neighbors was a realistic reflection of what actually happens and what would actually be said in these situations.
I thought that overall, this was fine and was a good enough debut but I wish the author had really taken it “there” with this book. It was begging for more real conflict and more drama that matched the excellence of the set up. As it is, this is a good story about contemporary polygamous relationships and arranged marriages with modern couples in West Africa and one young woman’s courageous journey to discovering her boundaries with love and relationships.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from Algonquin Books.
April 27, 2020
A domestic drama that opens up the lives of Ghanaian women, should appeal to fans of STAY WITH ME, as it also analyzes the implications of African polygamous patriarchy on modern women.
Afi does not have much. Her father is dead, her mother struggles to support her, her large extended family neglects her, and she is not gifted enough at schoolwork to get into a university. What she does have is her good looks, a good upbringing, and a talent for sewing and design. She is married to the son of her mother's wealthy benefactor, a marriage in absentia, but the marriage is just another move in the ongoing battle between Eli and his family. Eli loves a woman his family will not accept, and the marriage is their power move to get him to leave the other woman once and for all.
Afi is willing to accept this lot because it is the best prospect she has. She moves to one of Eli's homes in a luxury apartment building, leaving her small town for the big city. She works under one of Ghana's best fashion designers. And as her new status opens more doors, she starts to question the role she has taken on. Until she and Eli spend more time together and she falls in love.
I have seen some reviewers talk about this book as feminist and it is, but not the way I think people will expect. This is not another story of empowerment, nor is it preaching or advocating. Instead it is a zig zag, an up and down, a maze of a story where Afi begins to understand what is important to her. The women in this book are all different, they have all adapted to a society where even the most privileged of them is subject to the whims of a son or husband or boyfriend. If anything, it is a glimpse of how all kinds of women have adjusted to this kind of world and how they make their way in it. It's a style of novel I like quite a lot, one that opens up a place and time to you, letting you see it in intricate detail.
The prose is simple and straightforward, I was surprised to find that I read this very quickly. At one point I just didn't want to put it down.
Afi does not have much. Her father is dead, her mother struggles to support her, her large extended family neglects her, and she is not gifted enough at schoolwork to get into a university. What she does have is her good looks, a good upbringing, and a talent for sewing and design. She is married to the son of her mother's wealthy benefactor, a marriage in absentia, but the marriage is just another move in the ongoing battle between Eli and his family. Eli loves a woman his family will not accept, and the marriage is their power move to get him to leave the other woman once and for all.
Afi is willing to accept this lot because it is the best prospect she has. She moves to one of Eli's homes in a luxury apartment building, leaving her small town for the big city. She works under one of Ghana's best fashion designers. And as her new status opens more doors, she starts to question the role she has taken on. Until she and Eli spend more time together and she falls in love.
I have seen some reviewers talk about this book as feminist and it is, but not the way I think people will expect. This is not another story of empowerment, nor is it preaching or advocating. Instead it is a zig zag, an up and down, a maze of a story where Afi begins to understand what is important to her. The women in this book are all different, they have all adapted to a society where even the most privileged of them is subject to the whims of a son or husband or boyfriend. If anything, it is a glimpse of how all kinds of women have adjusted to this kind of world and how they make their way in it. It's a style of novel I like quite a lot, one that opens up a place and time to you, letting you see it in intricate detail.
The prose is simple and straightforward, I was surprised to find that I read this very quickly. At one point I just didn't want to put it down.
March 31, 2022
“She’s a woman who you don’t like because she does as she pleases.”
I’ve never been this conflicted about a book. Feel free to thoroughly curse me out if I say anything in my review that is disrespectful to the culture in the book. I do understand that this book was portraying the reality for a lot of women in Ghana, but I was still very uncomfortable with many parts of the plot.
Afi lives in Ho with her mom, and life has been really hard for them ever since Afi’s dad died. When she is presented with a proposal, her mom makes sure that Afi doesn’t mess this up. Afi is a bit hesitant, but she recognizes that this could potentially change their lives forever. However, Elikem, the man she is marrying, is with another woman whom the family doesn’t approve of. The family believes that Afi can essentially “change” his mind into leaving the other woman. Will Afi succeed in getting Elikem to commit to her alone?
It is quite common for certain cultures to have this tension between women since the men are presented as this golden prize. Usually can't stand other women being blamed for men not having their shit together, so first trigger. I think the problem is that I wish everyone believed that women were also human beings and not just wives or breeding machines.
Afi loves to sew and gets the opportunity to pursue it. This part of the plot was really nice since it showed that Afi didn’t think she didn’t need to work. I liked that Medie wrote about her insecurities around other people who seemed to have accomplished a lot. How far will her dream go?
Back to realistic portrayal, the way women are treated was very hard to see. Afi was obviously the main example, but there were so many other women in this book. All their unique experiences really revealed that there are many ways to be hated by your community. Also, I know I’m making it sound like we don’t see some growth in Afi because we do! I want to say the growth took too long....but no one’s growth is perfect or should have a time period…….Arrrrrgh!! Just my different book personalities conflicting.
“Not everyone who smiles with you wishes you well.” I like some of the lessons we learned in this book, particularly that some people are only around you when they can benefit. It was so sickening to see these things play out with Afi and her mother’s family. Issues of colorism and people-pleasing syndrome were also illustrated a few times in the book.
Overall, just go into this with an open mind. It’s okay if you get very uncomfortable, just remember to be respectful.
I’ve never been this conflicted about a book. Feel free to thoroughly curse me out if I say anything in my review that is disrespectful to the culture in the book. I do understand that this book was portraying the reality for a lot of women in Ghana, but I was still very uncomfortable with many parts of the plot.
Afi lives in Ho with her mom, and life has been really hard for them ever since Afi’s dad died. When she is presented with a proposal, her mom makes sure that Afi doesn’t mess this up. Afi is a bit hesitant, but she recognizes that this could potentially change their lives forever. However, Elikem, the man she is marrying, is with another woman whom the family doesn’t approve of. The family believes that Afi can essentially “change” his mind into leaving the other woman. Will Afi succeed in getting Elikem to commit to her alone?
It is quite common for certain cultures to have this tension between women since the men are presented as this golden prize. Usually can't stand other women being blamed for men not having their shit together, so first trigger. I think the problem is that I wish everyone believed that women were also human beings and not just wives or breeding machines.
Afi loves to sew and gets the opportunity to pursue it. This part of the plot was really nice since it showed that Afi didn’t think she didn’t need to work. I liked that Medie wrote about her insecurities around other people who seemed to have accomplished a lot. How far will her dream go?
Back to realistic portrayal, the way women are treated was very hard to see. Afi was obviously the main example, but there were so many other women in this book. All their unique experiences really revealed that there are many ways to be hated by your community. Also, I know I’m making it sound like we don’t see some growth in Afi because we do! I want to say the growth took too long....but no one’s growth is perfect or should have a time period…….Arrrrrgh!! Just my different book personalities conflicting.
“Not everyone who smiles with you wishes you well.” I like some of the lessons we learned in this book, particularly that some people are only around you when they can benefit. It was so sickening to see these things play out with Afi and her mother’s family. Issues of colorism and people-pleasing syndrome were also illustrated a few times in the book.
Overall, just go into this with an open mind. It’s okay if you get very uncomfortable, just remember to be respectful.
June 27, 2021
This book was kinda a snoozer. It felt incredibly long, in terms of details, details, details- that didn’t necessarily further the story. 🥱 The juicy bits, of love, lust, other woman drama, etc. were great. But everything in between was just kinda a bore. 😬 it’s an okay read, but not the best.
January 25, 2021
Updated January 25, 2021
Re-read this book for BookOfCinz Book Club and as I thought, I absolutely enjoyed it even more. I cannot wait for book club to talk about it all!
Marriage shouldn’t be a never-ending competition where you spend your life fighting to be seen and chosen
Peace Adzo Medie’s debut novel His Only Wife is a book you will read and continue to think about for months to come. The story opens up in a small town in Ghana, we meet Afi Tekple a young seamstress who is about to get married to a man she has never met, what’s more the man does not show up to their wedding because he is on a business trip. How did Afi end up in this predicament? Afi’s dad died and her mother was unable to provide for her, they lived on the charity of Aunty Ganyo. They felt so indebted to Aunty Ganyo so when she suggested that Afi marry her son, Elikem Ganyo, her mother forced her to say yes!
Afi ends up marrying Eli, moving to Accra to live in a fancy new apartment, having a driver to take her around, starting her apprenticeship as a fashion designer-all while waiting to meet her husband Eli for the first time. Afi is well aware that Eli has another “woman” and a child who he lives with close by, but she is married to him and there are some expectations for a marriage.
You have to learn to fight for your husband and never let your guard down Basically Afi meets and falls in love with Eli and sends their entire marriage trying to please and keep him. It is exhausting to say the least.
I was enamoured with this book from the beginning. I LOVE books that are set in Ghana and I have such an affinity for Ghana’s culture, I wanted to inhale this book. I felt the premise was strong and the execution equally as strong. I loved that it was contemporary Ghana and a love story. The writer did such a great job of taking us in to the marriage of Eli and Afi and I didn’t want to leave.
I really enjoyed this! If you are looking for a fresh, contemporary Ghanaian read, this is it!
Re-read this book for BookOfCinz Book Club and as I thought, I absolutely enjoyed it even more. I cannot wait for book club to talk about it all!
Marriage shouldn’t be a never-ending competition where you spend your life fighting to be seen and chosen
Peace Adzo Medie’s debut novel His Only Wife is a book you will read and continue to think about for months to come. The story opens up in a small town in Ghana, we meet Afi Tekple a young seamstress who is about to get married to a man she has never met, what’s more the man does not show up to their wedding because he is on a business trip. How did Afi end up in this predicament? Afi’s dad died and her mother was unable to provide for her, they lived on the charity of Aunty Ganyo. They felt so indebted to Aunty Ganyo so when she suggested that Afi marry her son, Elikem Ganyo, her mother forced her to say yes!
Afi ends up marrying Eli, moving to Accra to live in a fancy new apartment, having a driver to take her around, starting her apprenticeship as a fashion designer-all while waiting to meet her husband Eli for the first time. Afi is well aware that Eli has another “woman” and a child who he lives with close by, but she is married to him and there are some expectations for a marriage.
You have to learn to fight for your husband and never let your guard down Basically Afi meets and falls in love with Eli and sends their entire marriage trying to please and keep him. It is exhausting to say the least.
I was enamoured with this book from the beginning. I LOVE books that are set in Ghana and I have such an affinity for Ghana’s culture, I wanted to inhale this book. I felt the premise was strong and the execution equally as strong. I loved that it was contemporary Ghana and a love story. The writer did such a great job of taking us in to the marriage of Eli and Afi and I didn’t want to leave.
I really enjoyed this! If you are looking for a fresh, contemporary Ghanaian read, this is it!
August 27, 2021
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His Only Wife is an engrossing story that hooked me from the very first line: “Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding.”. The novel tells the story of Afi, a young woman who works as a seamstress in a small town in Ghana. When Faustina Ganyo, her benefactor who also happens to be her widowed mother's boss, arranges her marriage to her own son, Afi views it as a great honour and a lifetime opportunity. She feels indebted to Aunty and wants to please her own mother. Before the marriage Afi is informed of Elikem's particular situation: he has a daughter with a woman from Liberia, whom is hated by the Ganyos. Afi is meant to replace her, to bring Elikem back into the fold of the Ganyo family.
Once in Accra, Afi finds herself growing restless. In spite of her beautiful new apartment and her newly acquired wealth, she questions the validity of her marriage: after all, she only saw her Elikem years previously and has yet to meet him as her husband. Her Aunty, her brother-in-law, and her mother try to placate her anxiety, telling her tall-tales about the 'Liberian woman' who has brainwashed him and of Elikem's daughter poor health. When Afi finally gets to meet her husband she finds herself falling head-over-heels for him. He's attractive, influential, and Afi is willing to conform to the role of ideal wife for him.
As time passes, and Afi begins studying fashion and bonding with her brother-in-law's lover, she begins to chafe against the constraints imposed by the Ganyos, who time and again tell her not too demand too much from her husband, and remind her—subtly and not—of the advantages brought by her marrying 'upward'. When Afi grows increasingly jealous of the 'Liberian woman', she begins to disregards the Ganyos' and her husband's wishes and demands.
Quotidian spaces and seemingly ordinary conversations lead to fraught disagreements and disconcerting realisations. Afi's flashy new abode is the setting of many tense scenes, with her husband, the Ganyos', her mother. The drama 'caused' by the 'Liberian woman' creates a lot of conflict between Afi and her husband (and the Ganyos in general). As Afi grows tired of her circumstances, of being told to be grateful and to sit tight, she begin to crave autonomy and power in her own marriage.
While the tension between Afi and the rest of the characters made for some pretty absorbing scenes, I found myself growing increasingly frustrated by Afi. While it made sense for her to be naive, she just seemed to get used to her new life pretty fast (she treats staff poorly). Her devotion verging on obsession over Elikem didn't really convince me. One meeting and she's seemingly in love? Yet, for the majority of the novel he dons't treat her nicely, showing 'kindness' only once or twice towards the end of the narrative. That she believes all the gossip about his 'other' woman also struck me as unrealistic. Given that she's aware of how the Ganyos treat and speak of the people who 'wronged' them, surely she would at one point consider the possibility of those stories being less than truthful? Then it seemed that all of a sudden the idea of this 'other' woman was unbearable to her, when she knew from the very start that he was already in a relationship with someone else (making Afi the 'other' woman).
Her character development is kind of rushed. At the end she finally seems to get her act together, but by then I was no longer enjoying her narrative.
Part of me wishes that the Liberian woman had also been given a pov, making the novel feel less biased. I also wish that we could have seen more of Afi without the Ganyos (for example scenes while she's studying fashion would have been nice, or even her socialising with more people outside of her apartment).
Still, Medie does touch upon relevant issues, such the impact and pressure exerted by family and social expectations, and emphasising the double standards in marriage throughout the course of her narrative. Medie also depicts the sexist attitudes of those in Afi and the Ganyos' circle (a friend of husband says this: “man wasn’t made to be with one woman. You’re a lion, you should have an entire pride!” and I saw red).
Love, jealousy, betrayal, and angst add some spice to the story, making for some mostly entertaining reading material.
Read more reviews on my blog / / / View all my reviews on Goodreads
“All men are the same, they only know how to love themselves and to sit on women.”
His Only Wife is an engrossing story that hooked me from the very first line: “Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding.”. The novel tells the story of Afi, a young woman who works as a seamstress in a small town in Ghana. When Faustina Ganyo, her benefactor who also happens to be her widowed mother's boss, arranges her marriage to her own son, Afi views it as a great honour and a lifetime opportunity. She feels indebted to Aunty and wants to please her own mother. Before the marriage Afi is informed of Elikem's particular situation: he has a daughter with a woman from Liberia, whom is hated by the Ganyos. Afi is meant to replace her, to bring Elikem back into the fold of the Ganyo family.
Once in Accra, Afi finds herself growing restless. In spite of her beautiful new apartment and her newly acquired wealth, she questions the validity of her marriage: after all, she only saw her Elikem years previously and has yet to meet him as her husband. Her Aunty, her brother-in-law, and her mother try to placate her anxiety, telling her tall-tales about the 'Liberian woman' who has brainwashed him and of Elikem's daughter poor health. When Afi finally gets to meet her husband she finds herself falling head-over-heels for him. He's attractive, influential, and Afi is willing to conform to the role of ideal wife for him.
As time passes, and Afi begins studying fashion and bonding with her brother-in-law's lover, she begins to chafe against the constraints imposed by the Ganyos, who time and again tell her not too demand too much from her husband, and remind her—subtly and not—of the advantages brought by her marrying 'upward'. When Afi grows increasingly jealous of the 'Liberian woman', she begins to disregards the Ganyos' and her husband's wishes and demands.
Quotidian spaces and seemingly ordinary conversations lead to fraught disagreements and disconcerting realisations. Afi's flashy new abode is the setting of many tense scenes, with her husband, the Ganyos', her mother. The drama 'caused' by the 'Liberian woman' creates a lot of conflict between Afi and her husband (and the Ganyos in general). As Afi grows tired of her circumstances, of being told to be grateful and to sit tight, she begin to crave autonomy and power in her own marriage.
While the tension between Afi and the rest of the characters made for some pretty absorbing scenes, I found myself growing increasingly frustrated by Afi. While it made sense for her to be naive, she just seemed to get used to her new life pretty fast (she treats staff poorly). Her devotion verging on obsession over Elikem didn't really convince me. One meeting and she's seemingly in love? Yet, for the majority of the novel he dons't treat her nicely, showing 'kindness' only once or twice towards the end of the narrative. That she believes all the gossip about his 'other' woman also struck me as unrealistic. Given that she's aware of how the Ganyos treat and speak of the people who 'wronged' them, surely she would at one point consider the possibility of those stories being less than truthful? Then it seemed that all of a sudden the idea of this 'other' woman was unbearable to her, when she knew from the very start that he was already in a relationship with someone else (making Afi the 'other' woman).
Her character development is kind of rushed. At the end she finally seems to get her act together, but by then I was no longer enjoying her narrative.
Part of me wishes that the Liberian woman had also been given a pov, making the novel feel less biased. I also wish that we could have seen more of Afi without the Ganyos (for example scenes while she's studying fashion would have been nice, or even her socialising with more people outside of her apartment).
Still, Medie does touch upon relevant issues, such the impact and pressure exerted by family and social expectations, and emphasising the double standards in marriage throughout the course of her narrative. Medie also depicts the sexist attitudes of those in Afi and the Ganyos' circle (a friend of husband says this: “man wasn’t made to be with one woman. You’re a lion, you should have an entire pride!” and I saw red).
Love, jealousy, betrayal, and angst add some spice to the story, making for some mostly entertaining reading material.
Read more reviews on my blog / / / View all my reviews on Goodreads
May 30, 2021
Book 167 of 2021
Reread, still super awesome 😍
Reread, still super awesome 😍
December 18, 2020
This book is basically a Lifetime movie set in Ghana. Not my style at all. Aki and Eli are virtual strangers with an arranged marriage because Eli’s mother and siblings want to pry him away from his Liberian girlfriend Muna and their young daughter Ivy. Eli is wealthy and accomplished yet he obeys his mother’s demand to marry, although he won’t extricate himself from Muna and continues to live with her. Aki is set up in a luxurious apartment, which Eli visits from time to time. He’s rich, handsome, kind, attentive and generous. He cooks and does the dishes. But Aki will settle for nothing less than evicting Muna and Ivy from Eli’s house and living with Eli full time. She must be the only wife, no matter what happens to the woman who was there first and her sick child. Eli is forced to comply and eventually Aki has a son and is set up in a dress design business. It’s a fairy tale life. We never meet Muna, but the family’s objections to her seem to be based on the facts that she is dark skinned and isn’t interested in impressing the family.
I hated Aki (naive, selfish, petulant) and felt sorry for Muna. The blurb for this book claims that the author is “a fierce advocate for women’s rights”. If anything in this book has to do with women’s rights, I missed it. All of the controlling came from the interfering mothers of Aki and Eli. Muna is the character who needs feminist intervention and Eli needs a backbone. I thought this was going to be a book about a woman overcoming obstacles and taking control of her destiny. Instead I got soap opera. This book and I were not a good match. 2.5 stars
I received a free copy of this book from the publisher.
I hated Aki (naive, selfish, petulant) and felt sorry for Muna. The blurb for this book claims that the author is “a fierce advocate for women’s rights”. If anything in this book has to do with women’s rights, I missed it. All of the controlling came from the interfering mothers of Aki and Eli. Muna is the character who needs feminist intervention and Eli needs a backbone. I thought this was going to be a book about a woman overcoming obstacles and taking control of her destiny. Instead I got soap opera. This book and I were not a good match. 2.5 stars
I received a free copy of this book from the publisher.
March 19, 2023
An infuriating yet empowering novel on love, deception, and destiny. Through the eyes of young Afi, who is married to her husband with the sole goal of ending his relationship with a woman whom the family despises, we see the complicated inner workings of family and control. The lines between expectation and desire become increasingly blurred against the backdrop of forbidden love, personal ambition, jealousy, and self worth. As Afi grows, we are both thrilled and saddened on her behalf, she handles each obstacle with admirable grace, and even at her worst she is able to adapt and stand her ground. She is the embodiment of a difficult yet essential lesson: for as painful as it is, we sometimes have to cut out overbearing and selfish people in our lives if we hope have a true chance at happiness and success. An easy read that is filled with important messages.
August 24, 2025
Essentially about a Ghanian woman who marries a man, though the man is also in a relationship with another woman. There was some interesting commentary in His Only Wife about gender and marriage. I also think this book contained some intriguing themes about the predominance of monogamy and monogamy-oriented thinking across different societies, though I’m not sure if Peace Adzo Medie intended that.
I give this book three stars because while Medie’s writing was smooth and easy-to-read, this book almost felt too tame. I’m not saying anything shocking or violent needed to happen, rather, the characters weren’t as well-developed or three-dimensional as I would’ve liked, which limited my level of emotional investment in them. I will say that I found Medie’s sophomore novel, Nightbloom much stronger and that I’d highly recommend Nightbloom. Curious to see how Medie continues to develop as a writer!
I give this book three stars because while Medie’s writing was smooth and easy-to-read, this book almost felt too tame. I’m not saying anything shocking or violent needed to happen, rather, the characters weren’t as well-developed or three-dimensional as I would’ve liked, which limited my level of emotional investment in them. I will say that I found Medie’s sophomore novel, Nightbloom much stronger and that I’d highly recommend Nightbloom. Curious to see how Medie continues to develop as a writer!
November 15, 2020
[3+] His Only Wife is a breezy beach read about a poor Ghanian woman who marries a wealthy, handsome man. A Cinderella story with a complication - her husband is entangled with another woman. I was hoping for more substance but there's not much to this novel - in spite of all the hype.
October 17, 2020
This book gripped me from page one.
Watch my review: https://youtu.be/XUpzX4tXTOA
Watch my review: https://youtu.be/XUpzX4tXTOA
September 5, 2020
A modern tale of one woman discovering her own sense of purpose in Ghana amidst family drama, expectations, and marriage. I'm not one who automatically goes for domestic stories, so extremely pleased to say that this was such a fantastic read.
Characters: ★★★★★
Plot/Pacing: ★★★★
Enjoyment: ★★★★ 1/2
“Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding.”
That's the first line. I think it's charismatic enough on its own—it definitely made me want to pick it up—but for the sake of reviewing, let's get into it.
Afi is a young woman living in a small, rural community near the city of Accra in Ghana. Her mother and herself have existed on the edges of poverty, clinging to the good graces of their extended family and of Aunty, the rich benefactor of the community.
So when Aunty tells Afi and her mother to do something, they do it. Aunty's latest request is more than a passing task, however—Aunty wants Afi to marry her son, Eli.
Now there's obviously a catch to Aunty's "benevolence"—Afi also has another purpose as Eli's wife. Eli is currently living with a Liberian woman...who hates Aunty and doesn't allow the family to be close to them. It is Afi's job to lure him away and make him come back into the family fold.
Whew. Talk about an intense start to a marriage.
Afi was such an interesting character to spend time with, mostly because I found her pure heart and stalwart sense of self to be such a refreshing perspectivee in a female protagonist. This is a novel where it would have been easy to remove the woman's sense of agency—Afi is essentially a bought bride, who is meant to break up an existing relationship and trick her husband—but Afi stands strong. In a reality where she came from nothing and is thrust into a world unrecognizable to her own, she does her best.
And her best is pretty darn good... Accra is a big city, with big dreams. It's time for Afi to find herself and discover what it means to truly be free.
Thank you so much to Algonquin Books for my copy in exchange for an honest review.
Characters: ★★★★★
Plot/Pacing: ★★★★
Enjoyment: ★★★★ 1/2
“Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding.”
That's the first line. I think it's charismatic enough on its own—it definitely made me want to pick it up—but for the sake of reviewing, let's get into it.
Afi is a young woman living in a small, rural community near the city of Accra in Ghana. Her mother and herself have existed on the edges of poverty, clinging to the good graces of their extended family and of Aunty, the rich benefactor of the community.
So when Aunty tells Afi and her mother to do something, they do it. Aunty's latest request is more than a passing task, however—Aunty wants Afi to marry her son, Eli.
Now there's obviously a catch to Aunty's "benevolence"—Afi also has another purpose as Eli's wife. Eli is currently living with a Liberian woman...who hates Aunty and doesn't allow the family to be close to them. It is Afi's job to lure him away and make him come back into the family fold.
Whew. Talk about an intense start to a marriage.
Afi was such an interesting character to spend time with, mostly because I found her pure heart and stalwart sense of self to be such a refreshing perspectivee in a female protagonist. This is a novel where it would have been easy to remove the woman's sense of agency—Afi is essentially a bought bride, who is meant to break up an existing relationship and trick her husband—but Afi stands strong. In a reality where she came from nothing and is thrust into a world unrecognizable to her own, she does her best.
And her best is pretty darn good... Accra is a big city, with big dreams. It's time for Afi to find herself and discover what it means to truly be free.
Thank you so much to Algonquin Books for my copy in exchange for an honest review.
January 2, 2021
What. A. Book. This is my sleeper 5 star read of 2020. Peace Adzo Medie as masterfully woven together the unforgettable story of Afi a young girl from Ghana. Afi’s Family has arranged a marriage for her to a wealthy man, Eli. Afi is confused when Eli doesn’t even show up for the wedding ceremony but instead sends his brother as a stand in. Afi and her mother are then relocated to the big city where Afi finds out she’s not living in the marital home nor does she see Eli for weeks. it soon becomes apparent to Afi that Eli‘s family has ulterior motive‘s and that this marriage is meant to throw a wrench in Eli‘s current relationship. but this does not deter Afi she has come to the big city to realize her dream of becoming a fashion designer and is willing to take advantage of her current situation. Afi is a girl on a mission and on her way to succeed she makes many friends and learns many things about herself and the world around her.
Afi completely captured my heart. She was so strong and good and true. Eli certainly was not worthy of a girl like her. I loved the growth that Afi had throughout the story. And one of my favorite friendships in the book was the friendship that Afi and Evelyn formed. such an unlikely friendship that just prove that preconceptions are often wrong. I just loved everything about this book; the sense of place, the culture, the people. Soneela Mankani narrates the audiobook and she is one of my absolute favorite narrators. I seriously pick this book up simply because she was narrating it, and what a treat I got for doing so. As always Soneela adds the perfect voice to this story.
*** Big thank you to Workman Audio for my gifted copy of this book. All opinions are my own. ***
Afi completely captured my heart. She was so strong and good and true. Eli certainly was not worthy of a girl like her. I loved the growth that Afi had throughout the story. And one of my favorite friendships in the book was the friendship that Afi and Evelyn formed. such an unlikely friendship that just prove that preconceptions are often wrong. I just loved everything about this book; the sense of place, the culture, the people. Soneela Mankani narrates the audiobook and she is one of my absolute favorite narrators. I seriously pick this book up simply because she was narrating it, and what a treat I got for doing so. As always Soneela adds the perfect voice to this story.
*** Big thank you to Workman Audio for my gifted copy of this book. All opinions are my own. ***
December 17, 2020
His only wife starts off interesting enough with Afi marrying a man who hasn't even attended the wedding. After that, it falls flat. Afi seems naive, too timid and it wasn’t really likable. I wanted a strong protagonist and that’s what I had expected but I got the opposite. I do think the characters had strong voices and the family drama had potential but I just was bored and couldn’t wait for this to end.
Thanks to Netgalley and Workman Audio for the copy of an audiobook in exchange for an honest review.
Thanks to Netgalley and Workman Audio for the copy of an audiobook in exchange for an honest review.
March 22, 2020
This is a lovely, excellent, entertaining book! And what a journey! I laughed often, I cried at some points, I got annoyed at and on behalf of the main character. I even wanted to fight some of the characters.
I also wanted to fight the author at some point for writing such an unputdownable book (In my being engrossed I might have missed some deadlines and this is obviously her fault, not mine)... and also for the ending (I’ll leave you to judge)!
Such a fantastic first novel. Can’t wait to read more from Peace Medie!
I also wanted to fight the author at some point for writing such an unputdownable book (In my being engrossed I might have missed some deadlines and this is obviously her fault, not mine)... and also for the ending (I’ll leave you to judge)!
Such a fantastic first novel. Can’t wait to read more from Peace Medie!
March 19, 2024
The book is set in Ghana and narrated by Afi – a young woman who lives with her widowed mother in a small town, and works as a seamstress. The book opens in the house of her Uncle Pious, her father’s oldest brother and family patriarch (a role he largely sees as a means to extract money from his family) – Afi is being married to Elikem (the son of her mother’s boss – Auntie – or Faustina Ganyo – who has been a great benefactor to the family) but Elikem is absent and his brother Richard stands in.
Afi realistically knows that Eli’s absence, while partly due to international business travel, is also due to the circumstances of their wedding. Eli is in a relationship with a Liberian woman and has a child by her (who suffers from sickle cell anemia) – but the woman refuses to acknowledge the Ganyo family (something they are not used to given their wealth and business and political connections in Ghana) and so Aunty draws up the plan to get Afi married to force Eli away from her.
When Afi moves to Accra she realises this will not be a quick process – she is moved into a luxury flat (next door she later finds to Richard’s mistress Evelyn) and everything is put at her disposal (an allowance, a driver, enrolment in a fashionable textile design school) – everything but Eli who is still living with the other woman (Muna) in his house.
When she does meet Eli she immediately (albeit rather inexplicably for the reader) falls in love with him – but this has the effect of making her unwilling to go along with the pretense of being second choice. And this puts her in conflict with: Eli (who insists he will resolve the situation, just not yet); the Ganyo’s (who sympathise with her situation and want the same end as her – but want her to follow their timing); her mother (who feels this is her one chance both to repay her benefactress Aunty plus to gain her own independence from Uncle Pious and build her own house) and Uncle Pious (who cannot understand why Afi, as part of her family obligations, is not sending him copious gifts and agreeing to house and pay school fees for various cousins).
Her only real allies are her best friend Masuwi and the cynically world-weary Evelyn.
To be honest I was disappointed in the book.
The author is I understand a well respected intellectual and a strong advocate for women’s rights; however this book lacks any literary depth in its writing (I reached the end of the book and had not highlighted any passages to include in my review) and I have to say I struggled with it as being about women’s rights (as it largely seemed to be about a girl who falls in love for little reason – other than wealth and influence – with someone she already knows to be in a relationship - and is prepared to hate another woman based entirely on the views of a family whose views she knows to be unreliable).
However I think it will appeal to many book groups. It has a simple and linear plot, easy to follow writing and with a cast of characters whose motivations and actions can be debated; and all set against an interesting (if rather unappealing) insight into the Ghanian culture of wealth differences, extended patronage, family obligations and polygamous behaviour.
My thanks to Oneworld Publications for an ARC via NetGalley
Afi realistically knows that Eli’s absence, while partly due to international business travel, is also due to the circumstances of their wedding. Eli is in a relationship with a Liberian woman and has a child by her (who suffers from sickle cell anemia) – but the woman refuses to acknowledge the Ganyo family (something they are not used to given their wealth and business and political connections in Ghana) and so Aunty draws up the plan to get Afi married to force Eli away from her.
When Afi moves to Accra she realises this will not be a quick process – she is moved into a luxury flat (next door she later finds to Richard’s mistress Evelyn) and everything is put at her disposal (an allowance, a driver, enrolment in a fashionable textile design school) – everything but Eli who is still living with the other woman (Muna) in his house.
When she does meet Eli she immediately (albeit rather inexplicably for the reader) falls in love with him – but this has the effect of making her unwilling to go along with the pretense of being second choice. And this puts her in conflict with: Eli (who insists he will resolve the situation, just not yet); the Ganyo’s (who sympathise with her situation and want the same end as her – but want her to follow their timing); her mother (who feels this is her one chance both to repay her benefactress Aunty plus to gain her own independence from Uncle Pious and build her own house) and Uncle Pious (who cannot understand why Afi, as part of her family obligations, is not sending him copious gifts and agreeing to house and pay school fees for various cousins).
Her only real allies are her best friend Masuwi and the cynically world-weary Evelyn.
To be honest I was disappointed in the book.
The author is I understand a well respected intellectual and a strong advocate for women’s rights; however this book lacks any literary depth in its writing (I reached the end of the book and had not highlighted any passages to include in my review) and I have to say I struggled with it as being about women’s rights (as it largely seemed to be about a girl who falls in love for little reason – other than wealth and influence – with someone she already knows to be in a relationship - and is prepared to hate another woman based entirely on the views of a family whose views she knows to be unreliable).
However I think it will appeal to many book groups. It has a simple and linear plot, easy to follow writing and with a cast of characters whose motivations and actions can be debated; and all set against an interesting (if rather unappealing) insight into the Ghanian culture of wealth differences, extended patronage, family obligations and polygamous behaviour.
My thanks to Oneworld Publications for an ARC via NetGalley
Read
March 5, 2021Set in Ghana, the story of a young woman married off to a man who has a girlfriend and child, in the hope she'll get rid of the other woman.
It's hugely readable--our heroine has a likeable voice, the physical setting and social details are superbly vividly drawn, the other characters well sketched. The only thing is, there's virtually no plot. It's a sequence of stuff that happens--they marry, they spend time together, she sets up a business, other people come in and out of her life, she makes a couple of big decisions--but it's very much "and then...and then". This is something I've seen in Nigerian soap-type genre fiction, so maybe that's the style; certainly it was extremely engaging and kept my attention. Possibly I feel that if we're doing soap opera I want more drama. In any case, I wolfed it down so take any complaints for what they're worth.
It's hugely readable--our heroine has a likeable voice, the physical setting and social details are superbly vividly drawn, the other characters well sketched. The only thing is, there's virtually no plot. It's a sequence of stuff that happens--they marry, they spend time together, she sets up a business, other people come in and out of her life, she makes a couple of big decisions--but it's very much "and then...and then". This is something I've seen in Nigerian soap-type genre fiction, so maybe that's the style; certainly it was extremely engaging and kept my attention. Possibly I feel that if we're doing soap opera I want more drama. In any case, I wolfed it down so take any complaints for what they're worth.
September 12, 2020
"Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding." When I read those words, I thought surely this novel was set in the past because who does that in the present. While the book is set in the past, it's not in the distant past, it's 2014.
The bride, Afi, has been given a mission by the family of her betrothed - force the break up of your husband and his girlfriend and return him to the family fold. That's not a small order, is it? But it seems a small price to pay for all Aunty Faustina Ganyo has done for Afi and her mother. And it's a win-win for Afi. She gets to leave her small town for Accra and an opportunity to study fashion design. Indeed, a small price to pay for marrying someone you've only met in passing and never with the intention of marrying him.
Initially I thought His Only Wife might be reminiscent of Lola Shoneyin's The Secret Lives of Baba Segi's Wives, but that notion is quickly disavowed with Afi's arrival in Accra. While the author's description of Afi's life back in her home town is full of family members and detailed descriptions of their personalities, their backgrounds, etc., giving readers a chance to get to know them, descriptions of the people she meets in Accra tend to be more superficial. I never really felt like I got to know them so I had difficulty determining if their motives were sincere.
I think I expected more of His Only Wife than the author was able to give. Afi reads more like an impressionable early teen than an adult woman. Her story line is steady in some parts and rushed in others. It's the rushed parts that needed more detail and consistency to give the book some balance.
The bride, Afi, has been given a mission by the family of her betrothed - force the break up of your husband and his girlfriend and return him to the family fold. That's not a small order, is it? But it seems a small price to pay for all Aunty Faustina Ganyo has done for Afi and her mother. And it's a win-win for Afi. She gets to leave her small town for Accra and an opportunity to study fashion design. Indeed, a small price to pay for marrying someone you've only met in passing and never with the intention of marrying him.
Initially I thought His Only Wife might be reminiscent of Lola Shoneyin's The Secret Lives of Baba Segi's Wives, but that notion is quickly disavowed with Afi's arrival in Accra. While the author's description of Afi's life back in her home town is full of family members and detailed descriptions of their personalities, their backgrounds, etc., giving readers a chance to get to know them, descriptions of the people she meets in Accra tend to be more superficial. I never really felt like I got to know them so I had difficulty determining if their motives were sincere.
I think I expected more of His Only Wife than the author was able to give. Afi reads more like an impressionable early teen than an adult woman. Her story line is steady in some parts and rushed in others. It's the rushed parts that needed more detail and consistency to give the book some balance.
February 10, 2021
This story didn't do it for me. I felt like there were too many plotholes and I don't know why I thought this would be an African thriller in the same vein of My Sister, the Serial Killer — it wasn't.
His Only Wife is a family drama in the vein of a somewhat twisted Cinderella story. However, no one, especially the main character Afi, asked enough questions for me. She didn't try to meet the other woman before giving herself away to this man. She just raged.
The publisher's summary of this book describes it as "Crazy Rich Asians of Africa". I read that after chapter 4, when I was trying to figure out why this was not hitting for me. I don't know if I would have read His Only Wife if I had read that at the outset of the book. Personal choice. If you enjoyed Crazy Rich Asians, you'll probably enjoy this book.
I also was conflicted by how they, Afi & Eli, fell in "love" — what passes for love? I feel if Afi was even a stitch as logical as Evelyn, she would have been happier.
Anyway, this was missing something for me. Something...
His Only Wife is a family drama in the vein of a somewhat twisted Cinderella story. However, no one, especially the main character Afi, asked enough questions for me. She didn't try to meet the other woman before giving herself away to this man. She just raged.
The publisher's summary of this book describes it as "Crazy Rich Asians of Africa". I read that after chapter 4, when I was trying to figure out why this was not hitting for me. I don't know if I would have read His Only Wife if I had read that at the outset of the book. Personal choice. If you enjoyed Crazy Rich Asians, you'll probably enjoy this book.
I also was conflicted by how they, Afi & Eli, fell in "love" — what passes for love? I feel if Afi was even a stitch as logical as Evelyn, she would have been happier.
Anyway, this was missing something for me. Something...
November 9, 2020
Find all of my reviews at: http://52bookminimum.blogspot.com/
Apparently Kirkus Reviews has called this the new Crazy Rich Asians?????
I mean, unless the only requirement is to show a wedding from another country/culture. I guess if that’s the criteria then good job, Kirkus, you really nailed it!
I don’t have a whole lot to say about this one. I picked it up because it was one of Reece’s book club books and although I knew I wanted to start a new book, I also knew I would totally be hooked on Steve Kornacki’s khakis the entire time I was reading so it had to be light. Reece’s books seem to be a lot like her – pleasant and easy to be around. They are also female-centric and deliver some sort of social message without beating you over the head about it which I absolutely can get on board with.
The story here is about a young woman named Afi who finds herself in an arranged marriage to a man who doesn’t even show up for the wedding. Over time, their relationship improves and she begins to fall in love with him – which opens a whole other can of worms regarding commitment and fidelity and what is acceptable to Afi when it comes to her marriage. I was fascinated by the potential book club discussions regarding cheating. Particularly, who most would view as the “homewrecker” – the husband’s “baby mama” or Afi herself?
3.5 Stars
Apparently Kirkus Reviews has called this the new Crazy Rich Asians?????
I mean, unless the only requirement is to show a wedding from another country/culture. I guess if that’s the criteria then good job, Kirkus, you really nailed it!
I don’t have a whole lot to say about this one. I picked it up because it was one of Reece’s book club books and although I knew I wanted to start a new book, I also knew I would totally be hooked on Steve Kornacki’s khakis the entire time I was reading so it had to be light. Reece’s books seem to be a lot like her – pleasant and easy to be around. They are also female-centric and deliver some sort of social message without beating you over the head about it which I absolutely can get on board with.
The story here is about a young woman named Afi who finds herself in an arranged marriage to a man who doesn’t even show up for the wedding. Over time, their relationship improves and she begins to fall in love with him – which opens a whole other can of worms regarding commitment and fidelity and what is acceptable to Afi when it comes to her marriage. I was fascinated by the potential book club discussions regarding cheating. Particularly, who most would view as the “homewrecker” – the husband’s “baby mama” or Afi herself?
3.5 Stars
December 17, 2020
His Only Wife by Peace Adzo Medie is a poignant tale of love, perseverance, and faith.
This story was eye opening, exposing me to a whole world and culture that I know nothing about. This is a valuable book portraying a very difficult subject foreign to many. Author Peace Adzo Medie is known to be an advocate for women's rights and this story, ultimately, is about just that. But even more, it is about a woman determining her own rights and discovering her own worth and value in a world run by men.
The opening line, “Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding” is gripping and immediately hooks the reader. The protagonist, Afi, is a beautiful woman but of little means and an unpromising. When she is offered an opportunity to marry a man of status and wealth, for her family, she accepts.
We follow Afi through her experience as a wife wed to a man she doesn't even know, in a culture and world that doesn't truly value her as anything more than a wife with duties to care for her husband and give him a family. Even if that husband is unfaithful and even when, against all odds, she falls in love with him.
But like most things, their seemingly perfect marriage is not what it seems. When Afi finally finds her voice and stands up for herself, I cheered! I was completely engrossed in her story. This story does so much to develop characters and describe the culture.
This is a heroic story about a woman learning that she deserves more, she deserves better, she deserves a man who wants her to be his only wife.
Thank you Netgalley, Workman Audio, and Peace Adzo Medie for this Audiobook for review.
This story was eye opening, exposing me to a whole world and culture that I know nothing about. This is a valuable book portraying a very difficult subject foreign to many. Author Peace Adzo Medie is known to be an advocate for women's rights and this story, ultimately, is about just that. But even more, it is about a woman determining her own rights and discovering her own worth and value in a world run by men.
The opening line, “Elikem married me in absentia; he did not come to our wedding” is gripping and immediately hooks the reader. The protagonist, Afi, is a beautiful woman but of little means and an unpromising. When she is offered an opportunity to marry a man of status and wealth, for her family, she accepts.
We follow Afi through her experience as a wife wed to a man she doesn't even know, in a culture and world that doesn't truly value her as anything more than a wife with duties to care for her husband and give him a family. Even if that husband is unfaithful and even when, against all odds, she falls in love with him.
But like most things, their seemingly perfect marriage is not what it seems. When Afi finally finds her voice and stands up for herself, I cheered! I was completely engrossed in her story. This story does so much to develop characters and describe the culture.
This is a heroic story about a woman learning that she deserves more, she deserves better, she deserves a man who wants her to be his only wife.
Thank you Netgalley, Workman Audio, and Peace Adzo Medie for this Audiobook for review.
October 2, 2020
Peace Adzo Medie writes a timely novel about the strength and sacrifices of women for their family, to gain acceptance of the cultural and social norms, as well as, the cost of life choices.
Young Afi Tekple's life is about to change. She is given an opportunity of a lifetime - to receive a proposal of marriage to one of the wealthiest families in their small town. Aunty Faustina Ganyo has helped Afi and her widowed mother Olivia, so when this opportunity arose to marry Aunty's son Elikem, Afi could not refuse such an offer. Though she has never met him, she knows this will help her family greatly.
Afi enters into this marriage with great difficulty - First, Elikem marries Afi with a stand-in and to make matters worse, Elikem is in love with a Liberian woman named Muna. Though she is settled in a luxurious flat in Accra, it would be weeks before she is to see her husband. Afi easily gets comfortable with the luxuries of her new life - out of poverty. Does she continue to sacrifice in order to secure a better future for herself and her family, or is this self-sacrifice costing her own life's happiness and more?
This was a brilliantly told novel with deep characterization, and a well written heroine of our time that addressed significant cultural references, and the injustices relating to gender, class and wealth.
This was a fascinating read that I highly recommend.
Young Afi Tekple's life is about to change. She is given an opportunity of a lifetime - to receive a proposal of marriage to one of the wealthiest families in their small town. Aunty Faustina Ganyo has helped Afi and her widowed mother Olivia, so when this opportunity arose to marry Aunty's son Elikem, Afi could not refuse such an offer. Though she has never met him, she knows this will help her family greatly.
Afi enters into this marriage with great difficulty - First, Elikem marries Afi with a stand-in and to make matters worse, Elikem is in love with a Liberian woman named Muna. Though she is settled in a luxurious flat in Accra, it would be weeks before she is to see her husband. Afi easily gets comfortable with the luxuries of her new life - out of poverty. Does she continue to sacrifice in order to secure a better future for herself and her family, or is this self-sacrifice costing her own life's happiness and more?
This was a brilliantly told novel with deep characterization, and a well written heroine of our time that addressed significant cultural references, and the injustices relating to gender, class and wealth.
This was a fascinating read that I highly recommend.
October 21, 2020
Afi is one of the most unlikable protagonists I’ve ever encountered. Her naivety was exhausting and her lack of common sense towards her situation gave me secondhand embarrassment.
December 22, 2021
This book’s review meme is for my Love & Hip Hop fans. For those of y’all that are exceeding your reading goals instead of catching up on VH1, here’s a little context LOL.
Now, for my less profane thoughts: His Only Wife is an enthralling story about two Ghanian families, one love triangle, and the people and places caught in between them.
I mention place because Peace Adzo Medie accomplishes a wonderful pull-and-push between the two main geographic settings in the story: the big city (Accra) and the country town (Ho) where many of the central characters are from. There are also many shadow places in this story: the childhood home of Afi (our narrator), which represents her immediate family’s former status when her father was living; the various offices and business locations of Afi’s husband, Eli; and the shadow homes that Eli shares with his mysterious partner, Muna. This “other relationship” is one of the central tensions of this story, and it is mostly described through a host of misinformation from Eli’s family, the Ganyos.
While Eli and Muna’s relationship is the most obvious source of Afi’s strife, it wasn’t handled well enough to become the most *compelling* tension in this story (more on that later.) For me, that prize goes to Afi’s internal tension between her familial duty and her personal wellbeing. This book does a great job of sinking you deep into the oppressive notions of womanhood and “wifeliness” that are placed upon Afi from the onset of her marriage. These expectations expose the simultaneous beauty and burden of family, which can be both comforting (such as Afi’s relationship with her cousin Mawusi) and a source of intense strife (such as the relationship with her uncle Pious.) Afi is expected to uphold these many familial relationships while also joining the Ganyo family, where she is tasked with ensuring that her husband leaves his mistress. This is partially due to a “debt” Afi and her mother are alleged to owe Eli Ganyo’s mother, a woman who provided shelter and work for them when they were in need. This financial manipulation impacts Afi’s relationship with her own mother, who often cowers under the power dynamic she has been subjugated to since her husband’s death. Afi’s mother’s ingrained sense of fealty to Eli’s mother leads her to heap significant expectations on her daughter to be the perfect wife to an imaginary husband. The book is most cathartic in the moments when Afi gathers the courage to put herself before her societal obligations, many of which are unfair to her and the less fortunate women in this story (such as Muna.)
I’m giving this book four stars because I do feel like the pacing was a bit bizarre. While I enjoyed each page of this novel, as we got further through the halfway mark, I found myself surprised that we *still* hadn’t come to the must-have meeting between Afi and Muna. I think the scene Peace Adzo Medie does provide is well-crafted, but just too late in a relatively short novel to make up for the many questions we have about this other relationship. After the incident, we speed towards what feels like a hasty conclusion. The process of Afi realizing Eli could never give her what she wanted in a relationship could have easily been twelve chapters, especially as she shares this revelation with her family members. The conversations where Eli and his sister fully reveal their true feelings about Afi are so telling, and they could have landed so much harder with the adequate space and time. Eli and Yaya’s final confrontations with Afi keenly expose how the Ganyo family’s entire structure and self-worth is deeply rooted in patriarchy and class antagonism. This produces undue pressure for the Ganyo children (Eli, Fred, Richard, and Yaya) as well as financial and emotional abuse for those they deem beneath them. I think it would have been incredibly helpful for Peace Adzo Medie to peel back the curtain on how these “isms” have impacted the Ganyo’s lives, in the same way she portrays the societal burden placed on Afi’s shoulders. Instead, we brush past Eli and Yaya’s final scenes so quickly that I barely felt they had time to land with Afi, let alone the readers.
Finally, I think the revelation of Muna is so anticlimactic because while we quickly learn that the little Afi knew about her was incorrect, there is limited space given in the book to rewrite that misinformation. I didn’t really question the Ganyo’s narrative of Afi as “the good wife” and Muna as “the wicked Liberian woman” until it was too late, which perhaps speaks to my own internalized misogyny. Maybe it was easy for me to believe this narrative because it’s not too different from harmful narratives I’ve heard in my own culture and family that I’m still working to unlearn (so and so’s girlfriend is a gold digger, this person “couldn’t keep a man” and that’s why they were cheated on, etc.) I would have easily read another hundred pages that allowed Afi to learn more of Muna’s side of the story about Eli and the Ganyos, and allowed readers like me to unravel our ingrained assumptions about “the other woman.” In many senses, it would be more accurate to call Afi the other woman, and I think hearing more from Muna would allow this to be a clearer point in the novel. We largely think of Afi as the “legitimate wife” because of an official ceremony she had and Muna’s alleged indesire to participate in Eli’s culture, but this tells us nothing about the actual conditions of either relationship. Those conditions could include more of the intimacies between Muna and Eli that Afi glimpses in their home, intimacies that mirror or maybe even exceed Afi and Eli’s best moments. Comparing both relationships in terms of each party’s treatment of the other could’ve allowed this novel to shed some light on the possibilities of ethical non-monogamy and polyamory. By detailing how both relationships had positive components, we could see more clearly what *could have been* healthy relationships on either side. In other words, we’d see the central problem was not the very nature of a person having multiple partners, but that this specific person was dishonest and manipulative in his partnerships.
In this way, more time “in the light” about Muna and Eli’s relationship would’ve helped cement Eli as the central villain of this story—having reached the end, I am kind of peeved at his portrayal. For at least half of the novel, he is painted as a troubled son and charming sex symbol who is just trying his best to make everyone happy, instead of A GROWN MAN WHO CALLS HIS WIFE UNREASONABLE FOR WANTING TO LIVE IN THE SAME HOUSE AS HIM. For a long time, Afi (and gullible readers like me!) viewed Eli at least slightly favorably thanks to the misinformation from his family. Once this is stripped away, it’s clear that Eli is a selfish, spoiled man who desires a polyamorous lifestyle without any ethical structure to undergird it. If we heard more from Muna, I think we would come to see the similarities between her and Afi’s experience, as both women were treated unfairly by the man they love, as well as his family.
Even without this ultimate resolution, I’m thankful for the time I was able to spend with this book, and would definitely recommend it to others! If people are trying to finish their 2020 reading goals, this is one you won’t be able to put down until you complete it! :)
Now, for my less profane thoughts: His Only Wife is an enthralling story about two Ghanian families, one love triangle, and the people and places caught in between them.
I mention place because Peace Adzo Medie accomplishes a wonderful pull-and-push between the two main geographic settings in the story: the big city (Accra) and the country town (Ho) where many of the central characters are from. There are also many shadow places in this story: the childhood home of Afi (our narrator), which represents her immediate family’s former status when her father was living; the various offices and business locations of Afi’s husband, Eli; and the shadow homes that Eli shares with his mysterious partner, Muna. This “other relationship” is one of the central tensions of this story, and it is mostly described through a host of misinformation from Eli’s family, the Ganyos.
While Eli and Muna’s relationship is the most obvious source of Afi’s strife, it wasn’t handled well enough to become the most *compelling* tension in this story (more on that later.) For me, that prize goes to Afi’s internal tension between her familial duty and her personal wellbeing. This book does a great job of sinking you deep into the oppressive notions of womanhood and “wifeliness” that are placed upon Afi from the onset of her marriage. These expectations expose the simultaneous beauty and burden of family, which can be both comforting (such as Afi’s relationship with her cousin Mawusi) and a source of intense strife (such as the relationship with her uncle Pious.) Afi is expected to uphold these many familial relationships while also joining the Ganyo family, where she is tasked with ensuring that her husband leaves his mistress. This is partially due to a “debt” Afi and her mother are alleged to owe Eli Ganyo’s mother, a woman who provided shelter and work for them when they were in need. This financial manipulation impacts Afi’s relationship with her own mother, who often cowers under the power dynamic she has been subjugated to since her husband’s death. Afi’s mother’s ingrained sense of fealty to Eli’s mother leads her to heap significant expectations on her daughter to be the perfect wife to an imaginary husband. The book is most cathartic in the moments when Afi gathers the courage to put herself before her societal obligations, many of which are unfair to her and the less fortunate women in this story (such as Muna.)
I’m giving this book four stars because I do feel like the pacing was a bit bizarre. While I enjoyed each page of this novel, as we got further through the halfway mark, I found myself surprised that we *still* hadn’t come to the must-have meeting between Afi and Muna. I think the scene Peace Adzo Medie does provide is well-crafted, but just too late in a relatively short novel to make up for the many questions we have about this other relationship. After the incident, we speed towards what feels like a hasty conclusion. The process of Afi realizing Eli could never give her what she wanted in a relationship could have easily been twelve chapters, especially as she shares this revelation with her family members. The conversations where Eli and his sister fully reveal their true feelings about Afi are so telling, and they could have landed so much harder with the adequate space and time. Eli and Yaya’s final confrontations with Afi keenly expose how the Ganyo family’s entire structure and self-worth is deeply rooted in patriarchy and class antagonism. This produces undue pressure for the Ganyo children (Eli, Fred, Richard, and Yaya) as well as financial and emotional abuse for those they deem beneath them. I think it would have been incredibly helpful for Peace Adzo Medie to peel back the curtain on how these “isms” have impacted the Ganyo’s lives, in the same way she portrays the societal burden placed on Afi’s shoulders. Instead, we brush past Eli and Yaya’s final scenes so quickly that I barely felt they had time to land with Afi, let alone the readers.
Finally, I think the revelation of Muna is so anticlimactic because while we quickly learn that the little Afi knew about her was incorrect, there is limited space given in the book to rewrite that misinformation. I didn’t really question the Ganyo’s narrative of Afi as “the good wife” and Muna as “the wicked Liberian woman” until it was too late, which perhaps speaks to my own internalized misogyny. Maybe it was easy for me to believe this narrative because it’s not too different from harmful narratives I’ve heard in my own culture and family that I’m still working to unlearn (so and so’s girlfriend is a gold digger, this person “couldn’t keep a man” and that’s why they were cheated on, etc.) I would have easily read another hundred pages that allowed Afi to learn more of Muna’s side of the story about Eli and the Ganyos, and allowed readers like me to unravel our ingrained assumptions about “the other woman.” In many senses, it would be more accurate to call Afi the other woman, and I think hearing more from Muna would allow this to be a clearer point in the novel. We largely think of Afi as the “legitimate wife” because of an official ceremony she had and Muna’s alleged indesire to participate in Eli’s culture, but this tells us nothing about the actual conditions of either relationship. Those conditions could include more of the intimacies between Muna and Eli that Afi glimpses in their home, intimacies that mirror or maybe even exceed Afi and Eli’s best moments. Comparing both relationships in terms of each party’s treatment of the other could’ve allowed this novel to shed some light on the possibilities of ethical non-monogamy and polyamory. By detailing how both relationships had positive components, we could see more clearly what *could have been* healthy relationships on either side. In other words, we’d see the central problem was not the very nature of a person having multiple partners, but that this specific person was dishonest and manipulative in his partnerships.
In this way, more time “in the light” about Muna and Eli’s relationship would’ve helped cement Eli as the central villain of this story—having reached the end, I am kind of peeved at his portrayal. For at least half of the novel, he is painted as a troubled son and charming sex symbol who is just trying his best to make everyone happy, instead of A GROWN MAN WHO CALLS HIS WIFE UNREASONABLE FOR WANTING TO LIVE IN THE SAME HOUSE AS HIM. For a long time, Afi (and gullible readers like me!) viewed Eli at least slightly favorably thanks to the misinformation from his family. Once this is stripped away, it’s clear that Eli is a selfish, spoiled man who desires a polyamorous lifestyle without any ethical structure to undergird it. If we heard more from Muna, I think we would come to see the similarities between her and Afi’s experience, as both women were treated unfairly by the man they love, as well as his family.
Even without this ultimate resolution, I’m thankful for the time I was able to spend with this book, and would definitely recommend it to others! If people are trying to finish their 2020 reading goals, this is one you won’t be able to put down until you complete it! :)
April 25, 2021
Hello babies,
This post is for those who’ve been finding it difficult to read as of late; I’m not entirely sure what’s in the air, but whatever is floating around isn’t conducive to getting through a book.
However, despite the rut, I’ve been willing myself to read when and where I can even if it takes me an entire week.
I recently read 𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 by Peace Adzo Medie and was. . . hooked.
𝙉𝙊𝙒 I’m quite a fussy reader who doesn’t shy away from critique – especially when it comes to popular books – so I sat down to read 𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 with little-no expectations, and I can admit that I was pleasantly surprised lol.
𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 is a hilarious and light-hearted story about a Ghanaian poverty-stricken woman named Afi Tekple who marries a wealthy businessman by the name of Elikem Ganyo. However, Afi’s union to Elikem isn’t straightforward or rooted in the poor girl/rich boy trope that is heavily embellished with love, compatibility and soulmatism. Instead, Afi and Elikem’s marriage is a transactional arrangement implemented by their parents in a bid to free Elikem from the "𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙜𝙚" of another woman. (Heavy-bold-italics-underlined on the "𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙜𝙚" because no one loves claiming spiritual warfare more than a man who is fully capable of making decisions.)
Whilst Afi is excited by the prospect of her new life, the reality of marrying into a wealthy family like the Ganyos soon uncovers a twisted, manipulative and “NOW WHY AM I IN IT?” (word to Nene Leaks) truth that is sure to leave you wanting to slap people for their madness.
This title is an easy, enjoyable and nontraumatic read that I highly recommend to those who appreciate the work(s) of Abi Dare, Yaa Gyasi, Akwaeke Emezi and others.
Love,
Hena x
This post is for those who’ve been finding it difficult to read as of late; I’m not entirely sure what’s in the air, but whatever is floating around isn’t conducive to getting through a book.
However, despite the rut, I’ve been willing myself to read when and where I can even if it takes me an entire week.
I recently read 𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 by Peace Adzo Medie and was. . . hooked.
𝙉𝙊𝙒 I’m quite a fussy reader who doesn’t shy away from critique – especially when it comes to popular books – so I sat down to read 𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 with little-no expectations, and I can admit that I was pleasantly surprised lol.
𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙊𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 is a hilarious and light-hearted story about a Ghanaian poverty-stricken woman named Afi Tekple who marries a wealthy businessman by the name of Elikem Ganyo. However, Afi’s union to Elikem isn’t straightforward or rooted in the poor girl/rich boy trope that is heavily embellished with love, compatibility and soulmatism. Instead, Afi and Elikem’s marriage is a transactional arrangement implemented by their parents in a bid to free Elikem from the "𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙜𝙚" of another woman. (Heavy-bold-italics-underlined on the "𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙜𝙚" because no one loves claiming spiritual warfare more than a man who is fully capable of making decisions.)
Whilst Afi is excited by the prospect of her new life, the reality of marrying into a wealthy family like the Ganyos soon uncovers a twisted, manipulative and “NOW WHY AM I IN IT?” (word to Nene Leaks) truth that is sure to leave you wanting to slap people for their madness.
This title is an easy, enjoyable and nontraumatic read that I highly recommend to those who appreciate the work(s) of Abi Dare, Yaa Gyasi, Akwaeke Emezi and others.
Love,
Hena x
March 21, 2021
I expected something more along the lines of
Stay With Me
or
The Hairdresser of Harare
, or
The Secret Lives of Baba Segi's Wives
, but this was pretty dry and anticlimactic, like reading about the weather. Very little action, and lite on the drama and plot when there were more than a few opportunities to bring it. I would've even been open to liking it more had it gone the route of Crazy Rich Asians and made 60% of the book about wealth and luxury, but this was very tame in comparison.
Happy it was a breezy and easy read, though. This is a good one for the YA crowd.
Happy it was a breezy and easy read, though. This is a good one for the YA crowd.
January 31, 2023
Afi wants to be the only wife to her new husband, Elikem. And should anything the contrary be an option, i.e., having a second wife, even if this practice is accepted in your culture? This is the core of the struggle laid out in this book written through Afi’s perspective - the story is a fight to make her husband hers, and hold on to him, to keep his attentions on her instead of the other woman in his life.
The book starts off with very strong contextualisation of the circumstances that leads to a marriage between Afi and Eli, based in Ghana. Then a wonderful Cinderella story where Afi is swept off her feet to live in a shiny apartment in Accra. The character development for Afi is good, she takes control of her life instead of being solely dependent on husband, mother, others. She pursues formal study to elevate her seamstress skills to become a fashion designer, mingling with the rich and powerful – networks and conveniences she obtains through her all handsome, powerful, rich husband’s family.
I enjoyed reading about the upper class Ghanaian societal life, it was entertaining. I liked that Afi found her voice to stand up to the negative pressures from family, uncle and controlling in-laws (very common to South Asian society too). She challenged her husband and tried to make him see what he is doing is wrong – instead of accepting the fate he was dealing her. I found the ending to be abrupt, but it made me reflect afterwards on what I would do.
Overall, a good domestic drama from a Ghanaian cultural perspective, a quick and light read.
The book starts off with very strong contextualisation of the circumstances that leads to a marriage between Afi and Eli, based in Ghana. Then a wonderful Cinderella story where Afi is swept off her feet to live in a shiny apartment in Accra. The character development for Afi is good, she takes control of her life instead of being solely dependent on husband, mother, others. She pursues formal study to elevate her seamstress skills to become a fashion designer, mingling with the rich and powerful – networks and conveniences she obtains through her all handsome, powerful, rich husband’s family.
I enjoyed reading about the upper class Ghanaian societal life, it was entertaining. I liked that Afi found her voice to stand up to the negative pressures from family, uncle and controlling in-laws (very common to South Asian society too). She challenged her husband and tried to make him see what he is doing is wrong – instead of accepting the fate he was dealing her. I found the ending to be abrupt, but it made me reflect afterwards on what I would do.
Overall, a good domestic drama from a Ghanaian cultural perspective, a quick and light read.
September 6, 2020
So many people can catch these hands in this book. My list is long. Read this book.
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