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Messy
Alec Davies is an aging-out rock star.
He’s twenty years older than me.
He’s also my father’s ex-best friend.
Dad used to be the lead guitarist of The Skies, an icon of the 90s British music scene. His fights with lead singer Alec were legendary, and so was the band’s self-destruction. I’ve hunted down Alec to tell him that Dad is back in England and determined to die at home. Ending our first encounter by riding Alec’s face is not the smart thing. Saying “yes” when he wants to reconcile with my dad and offers his townhouse as hospice – it’s not the smart thing either, but I do that too.
This is a stand alone, full length romance. Happily ever after guaranteed.
He’s twenty years older than me.
He’s also my father’s ex-best friend.
Dad used to be the lead guitarist of The Skies, an icon of the 90s British music scene. His fights with lead singer Alec were legendary, and so was the band’s self-destruction. I’ve hunted down Alec to tell him that Dad is back in England and determined to die at home. Ending our first encounter by riding Alec’s face is not the smart thing. Saying “yes” when he wants to reconcile with my dad and offers his townhouse as hospice – it’s not the smart thing either, but I do that too.
This is a stand alone, full length romance. Happily ever after guaranteed.
204 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2020
41 people are currently reading
129 people want to read
About the author
Katie Porter
30 books208 followersKatie Porter is the award-winning writing team of longtime friends
Lorelie Brown
and
Carrie Lofty
. Both are multi-published in several romance genres, and both are RITA-nominated. Carrie holds an MA in history, loves movies, and has no fear of gross things like formaldehyde sharks. Her daughters aren't appreciative. Lorelie is a US Army veteran and true-crime devotee, whose three boys love when she screams like a little girl around spiders. After years of wishing and planning, they finally share an office in the Chicago area.
All five of Katie Porter’s "Vegas Top Guns" erotic romances received 4½ Stars from RT BookReviews. These books are "impressive and incredibly well done," and will "move Fifty Shades of Grey to the children’s section." The third title, HOLD 'EM , won a Reviewers' Choice award for Best Erotic Romance, and the m/m Christmas-themed CAME UPON A MIDNIGHT CLEAR was the first LGBTQ romance nominated for RT's Book of the Year.
All five of Katie Porter's " Vegas Top Guns " contemporary erotic romances received 4½ Stars from RT BookReviews. These books are "impressive and incredibly well done," and will "move Fifty Shades of Grey to the children’s section." The third title, HOLD 'EM , won a Reviewers' Choice award for Best Erotic Romance, and the m/m Christmas-themed CAME UPON A MIDNIGHT CLEAR was the first LGBTQ romance nominated for RT's Book of the Year.
All five of Katie Porter’s "Vegas Top Guns" erotic romances received 4½ Stars from RT BookReviews. These books are "impressive and incredibly well done," and will "move Fifty Shades of Grey to the children’s section." The third title, HOLD 'EM , won a Reviewers' Choice award for Best Erotic Romance, and the m/m Christmas-themed CAME UPON A MIDNIGHT CLEAR was the first LGBTQ romance nominated for RT's Book of the Year.
All five of Katie Porter's " Vegas Top Guns " contemporary erotic romances received 4½ Stars from RT BookReviews. These books are "impressive and incredibly well done," and will "move Fifty Shades of Grey to the children’s section." The third title, HOLD 'EM , won a Reviewers' Choice award for Best Erotic Romance, and the m/m Christmas-themed CAME UPON A MIDNIGHT CLEAR was the first LGBTQ romance nominated for RT's Book of the Year.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 62 reviews
January 10, 2020
Alec Davies: ageing rock star, decades older than Harlow Tate, who has at some point in time, screwed up the dynamics of the rock band The Skies of which Harlow’s father was an integral part of. But Silas Tate is a dying man…and Harlow seeks out Alec years later with this news with an unexpected outcome.
The age-gap difference is one that I never minded reading; this was in fact the reason I request this ARC. But ‘Messy’ started off awkward for me; rather, it blindsided me with a rather inexplicable hookup between Harlow Tate’s father’s friend when neither have really met properly before in the opening pages.
This was more than a groupie seeking out a rock star, that much Katie Porter made clear, but I wasn’t sure of their attraction (was there even one?) and why Harlow Tate did exactly what she did—the explanation had me scratching my head—and as willing as I was to read further on, I found that I understood less and less Harlow’s own convoluted motives for seeking out Alec Davies in the first place.
With a weak set-up and no build-up (Alec and Harlow didn’t even know each other personally before their dressing-room encounter), acting like they were suddenly in a relationship made absolutely no sense to me. In this case, motives mattered…and I couldn’t quite find any here that made logical sense for Harlow/Alec as a pairing at all—neither protagonist were pining, neither had personal history, no initial attraction…nada!—even if though the writing was decent. I stopped hence, at 14%, frustrated and bewildered, unable to go on.
I do tread into rock star romances from time to time, but unfortunately ‘Messy’ wasn’t one that did it for me at all.
*ARC by the publisher via Netgalley
The age-gap difference is one that I never minded reading; this was in fact the reason I request this ARC. But ‘Messy’ started off awkward for me; rather, it blindsided me with a rather inexplicable hookup between Harlow Tate’s father’s friend when neither have really met properly before in the opening pages.
This was more than a groupie seeking out a rock star, that much Katie Porter made clear, but I wasn’t sure of their attraction (was there even one?) and why Harlow Tate did exactly what she did—the explanation had me scratching my head—and as willing as I was to read further on, I found that I understood less and less Harlow’s own convoluted motives for seeking out Alec Davies in the first place.
With a weak set-up and no build-up (Alec and Harlow didn’t even know each other personally before their dressing-room encounter), acting like they were suddenly in a relationship made absolutely no sense to me. In this case, motives mattered…and I couldn’t quite find any here that made logical sense for Harlow/Alec as a pairing at all—neither protagonist were pining, neither had personal history, no initial attraction…nada!—even if though the writing was decent. I stopped hence, at 14%, frustrated and bewildered, unable to go on.
I do tread into rock star romances from time to time, but unfortunately ‘Messy’ wasn’t one that did it for me at all.
*ARC by the publisher via Netgalley
March 26, 2020
Oh do I love when a romance starts with a bang, and this may be one of the hottest first chapters I've read in recent memory.
So steamy and just *this* close to feeling a bit wrong, Messy is both a deliciously erotic age-gap romance AND a stark portrayal of grief and caring for a dying parent while also trying to find your own place in the world.
Read this one when you need a good punch in the heart and a fire in your loins, sexy British rock king included.
CW cancer, sick parent who dies during the story, drug/alcohol use, hero is 20 years older than the heroine.
I received a free copy for review from Netgalley
So steamy and just *this* close to feeling a bit wrong, Messy is both a deliciously erotic age-gap romance AND a stark portrayal of grief and caring for a dying parent while also trying to find your own place in the world.
Read this one when you need a good punch in the heart and a fire in your loins, sexy British rock king included.
CW cancer, sick parent who dies during the story, drug/alcohol use, hero is 20 years older than the heroine.
I received a free copy for review from Netgalley
April 8, 2020
I have super enjoyed the Katie Porter books I’ve read and this was no exception. Luminous writing and complex characters made this a hard book to put down.
This deals frankly with the death of Harlow’s father. At the start, he’s dying of lung cancer and wanted to return to his London roots, essentially to die. He’s a toxic man and it was hard at times to understand why Harlow would do anything asked, much less be his caregiver. Reading about codependent characters is quite often a struggle for me but in this case, Harlow knows the dynamics are messed up and she wants her father’s approval anyway. By the book’s end, she’s recognized her need for therapy but she’s also recognized that she needed to be able to do things for herself and not just cater to her dad. I thought the way the story depicted grief was great, very honest and raw.
It’s not clear exactly how much older Alec is than Harlow but I’d guess at least 20 years based on the band’s timeline. It didn’t feel taboo to me because their connection was so instantaneous and intense, well before Alec knew Harlow was his ex-bandmate’s daughter. Alec’s description reminded me of David Bowie—he’s bisexual and, at least in his rock star heyday, flouted gender norms. He has a commanding presence, even on the page, and I could see why Harlow was drawn to him. They made perfect sense together and I loved watching them resist each other as much as they gave in to their desires.
Super moving, incredibly smoking hot…I couldn’t have loved it more.
CW: father dying of lung cancer, death of father (pulmonary embolism, followed by heart attack), toxic/emotionally abusive father, codependency, past substance (heroin, hero has been sober 13 years), hero’s father was abusive, hero’s mother died of a stroke when he was 17, heroine’s father gave her alcohol when she was a child, brief reference to child sexual abuse (heroine’s father did nothing about it), hero recounts friend who overdosed but survived, heroine’s paternal grandparents died in house fire when she was 10 (she never met them), sexual harassment, heroine’s paternal grandfather was physically abusive to her dad
This deals frankly with the death of Harlow’s father. At the start, he’s dying of lung cancer and wanted to return to his London roots, essentially to die. He’s a toxic man and it was hard at times to understand why Harlow would do anything asked, much less be his caregiver. Reading about codependent characters is quite often a struggle for me but in this case, Harlow knows the dynamics are messed up and she wants her father’s approval anyway. By the book’s end, she’s recognized her need for therapy but she’s also recognized that she needed to be able to do things for herself and not just cater to her dad. I thought the way the story depicted grief was great, very honest and raw.
It’s not clear exactly how much older Alec is than Harlow but I’d guess at least 20 years based on the band’s timeline. It didn’t feel taboo to me because their connection was so instantaneous and intense, well before Alec knew Harlow was his ex-bandmate’s daughter. Alec’s description reminded me of David Bowie—he’s bisexual and, at least in his rock star heyday, flouted gender norms. He has a commanding presence, even on the page, and I could see why Harlow was drawn to him. They made perfect sense together and I loved watching them resist each other as much as they gave in to their desires.
Super moving, incredibly smoking hot…I couldn’t have loved it more.
CW: father dying of lung cancer, death of father (pulmonary embolism, followed by heart attack), toxic/emotionally abusive father, codependency, past substance (heroin, hero has been sober 13 years), hero’s father was abusive, hero’s mother died of a stroke when he was 17, heroine’s father gave her alcohol when she was a child, brief reference to child sexual abuse (heroine’s father did nothing about it), hero recounts friend who overdosed but survived, heroine’s paternal grandparents died in house fire when she was 10 (she never met them), sexual harassment, heroine’s paternal grandfather was physically abusive to her dad
November 14, 2022
Was this book good? No. Could I put it down… also no
March 23, 2020
Hot older British rockstar? Yes, please. Hot sex? Hell yes. But there's also a lot of angst and emotional shit in here so be aware:
CW: Ill parent, death of a parent, cancer, drug addiction
CW: Ill parent, death of a parent, cancer, drug addiction
Want to read
December 22, 2019💝
ARC provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
💝
March 20, 2020
Messy is the third book I’ve ready by Katie Porter, and while it didn’t *quite* unseat Double Down as my fave from her, it’s a phenomenal book.
In Messy, Harlow Tate has brought her dying father back to England. Hoping he’ll reconcile with his former bandmates from The Skies, Harlow seeks out the band’s frontman, Alec Davies. The two have immediate chemistry, and when Alec learns who Harlow is & why she’s brought her father to London, he extends an offer for both of them to stay at his townhouse. Cue drama.
This book has a lot of things that are 100% my catnip- age gap, British hero, a blocked artist finding their way, a satisfying redemption arc, and verrry steamy sex scenes. But the best thing about this book is the writing. The prose was –absolutely- gorgeous! I legitimately paused several times to just soak it in, and I have more highlights in this ebook than anything I’ve read for the last two months! There was also this really interesting quality to the book in that it occasionally felt like reading a mystery novel. There was clearly so much that had happened in the lives of these characters that I as the reader didn’t know, and those experiences are hinted at throughout the book, but it takes quite a while for the author to peel back all the layers. The effect feels a little like foreshadowing at times.
Its funny, the one thing that I didn’t quite love about this book is what I suspect my sister will love about it the most. When it comes to reading, I like to feel like I’m in the protagonist’s head, experiencing every emotion and thought as they form, stream of consciousness, through the brain. It gets real angsty but I love it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The choice to reveal things in pieces is definitely deliberate here, and while it’s done with an incredibly expert hand, I just wanted to know more! In a sense, this book made me feel like I didn’t have full access to either protagonist, and I wanted more than they shared in the text. Or at least, sooner than they shared it. Sister, however, tends to really love this style of writing and prefers it to the more “emotional” style that I love. Just comes down to preference I guess!
Overall I really enjoyed this book! While I sometimes longed for more detail than the characters gave, the writing was –stunningly- beautiful, the characters were fascinating, the chemistry was absolutely electric, and HEA was really satisfying. I couldn’t read it fast enough!
In Messy, Harlow Tate has brought her dying father back to England. Hoping he’ll reconcile with his former bandmates from The Skies, Harlow seeks out the band’s frontman, Alec Davies. The two have immediate chemistry, and when Alec learns who Harlow is & why she’s brought her father to London, he extends an offer for both of them to stay at his townhouse. Cue drama.
This book has a lot of things that are 100% my catnip- age gap, British hero, a blocked artist finding their way, a satisfying redemption arc, and verrry steamy sex scenes. But the best thing about this book is the writing. The prose was –absolutely- gorgeous! I legitimately paused several times to just soak it in, and I have more highlights in this ebook than anything I’ve read for the last two months! There was also this really interesting quality to the book in that it occasionally felt like reading a mystery novel. There was clearly so much that had happened in the lives of these characters that I as the reader didn’t know, and those experiences are hinted at throughout the book, but it takes quite a while for the author to peel back all the layers. The effect feels a little like foreshadowing at times.
Its funny, the one thing that I didn’t quite love about this book is what I suspect my sister will love about it the most. When it comes to reading, I like to feel like I’m in the protagonist’s head, experiencing every emotion and thought as they form, stream of consciousness, through the brain. It gets real angsty but I love it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The choice to reveal things in pieces is definitely deliberate here, and while it’s done with an incredibly expert hand, I just wanted to know more! In a sense, this book made me feel like I didn’t have full access to either protagonist, and I wanted more than they shared in the text. Or at least, sooner than they shared it. Sister, however, tends to really love this style of writing and prefers it to the more “emotional” style that I love. Just comes down to preference I guess!
Overall I really enjoyed this book! While I sometimes longed for more detail than the characters gave, the writing was –stunningly- beautiful, the characters were fascinating, the chemistry was absolutely electric, and HEA was really satisfying. I couldn’t read it fast enough!
December 24, 2019
Messy, sexy, mysterious...but also disjointed, jarring, abrupt. I wanted to like MESSY far more than I did; however, Alec and Harlow, together and separately, just didn't make any sense to me.
Alec and Harlow's meeting was electric hot, leaving not only tingles, but so many questions. What caused the rift between Alec and Harlow's dad Silas and broke up their band? Why is Silas so emotionally abusive to his daughter? Why are Harlow and Alec so drawn to each other?
Unfortunately, the answers never really crystallize. Even Harlow admits she's confused, too:
2.5 stars
Note: I voluntarily read and reviewed an eARC generously provided by NetGalley and the publisher.
Alec and Harlow's meeting was electric hot, leaving not only tingles, but so many questions. What caused the rift between Alec and Harlow's dad Silas and broke up their band? Why is Silas so emotionally abusive to his daughter? Why are Harlow and Alec so drawn to each other?
Unfortunately, the answers never really crystallize. Even Harlow admits she's confused, too:
Even now, I want him. I need to break him apart and see the bits inside, and I don't know what the fuck is so goddam compelling about him.Harlow and Alec carry on in secret although it is clear his bandmates don't approve and his ex-boyfriend is still in the shadows. With Harlow and Alec, it is hard to push for a HEA when the characters barely like themselves or each other.
"Do you respect me."Also, the barely discussed elephant in the room is their age gap, except for one grossly harsh reminder from Alec:
"I do. Do you respect yourself?"
"Not even a bit," I say, and then I kiss him.
You're so young. If I'd put my dick in the wrong hole on our first tour, you'd be the same age as a kid I never had.And with that, I was done with the story of Alec and Harlow. This may have been the first Katie Porter romance that I actually found myself skimming through the very hot sex scenes just to figure out what the heck was going on with the characters. But like the title, it was a mess.
2.5 stars
Note: I voluntarily read and reviewed an eARC generously provided by NetGalley and the publisher.
July 9, 2021
Really good and intense love story. God, the pain that the two main characters experienced in their separate pasts and in their fraught meeting and subsequent time together was tough to read about. I really enjoyed the entire story - the love story, the older guy/younger girl, prickly girl with tons of attitude, old rock & roller’s reuniting, etc. The father dying of cancer was terrible, but expected, since there is no coyness about how little time he has left. I think the sweetness of the love story is better for the bitterness of the emotional pain these two suffer. Gah. So good.
Bought from kindle.
Bought from kindle.
February 5, 2020
I was so not happy with this book. There really wasn't good character development for me, or maybe it was that by chapter 2 I was bored, I couldn't care less for these people, didn't understand there attraction to each other when they really didn't even like each other..yeah crap
Rcvd an ARC at no cost to author...(netgalley) voluntarily reviewed with my own thoughts and opinions
Rcvd an ARC at no cost to author...(netgalley) voluntarily reviewed with my own thoughts and opinions
March 18, 2020
Content warnings:
“Messy” is a very apt description for this book! First off, it’s an age gap romance between an aging rock star and the daughter of his ex-bandmate who’s dying of cancer, with all the content warnings that implies. Secondly, both main characters are, well, messy – they’re broken, with lots of sharp edges that don’t fit well together.
Harlow’s life in San Francisco – such as it is – has been put on hold while her father, Silas, is dying. She’s accompanied him back to England, his birthplace and where he was once part of The Skies. Silas left the band before she was even born, but its breakup and the aftermath has tainted every part of Harlow’s life, though her father has always refused to talk about his past. Alec and Silas, her father, had been close as brothers, before Silas’ actions led to the breakup, so the natural thing for Harlow to do is to break into his dressing room and confront him. She’s near obsessed with him, having analyzed everything available about the band – and him, like that he wore sunglasses to all his interviews in the 90s – in hopes of learning more about what made her father the way she is, and so made her the way she is. Meanwhile, Alec is trying to get the band back together for one last benefit concert. It’s not just the cause, but also the opportunity to rewrite the ending of The Skies. The overwhelming attraction between them is just an added complication. But is there anything between them besides their complicated relationships with Silas?
This is an angsty, steamy read between a pair of very flawed characters. Both had difficult, abusive childhoods, and while Alec has come to terms with it in his own way, Harlow is still very much in the midst of figuring out who she is and what she wants. While the beginning of their relationship is centered on how they both interact with Silas, they discover that their broken pieces fit together – mostly through lots and lots of sex. It’s definitely a taboo romance on several levels, with both the age gap and the fact that Alec was Harlow’s dad’s best friend turned enemy turned unlikely host, but both are addressed well in the book. The story is told from both Harlow and Alec’s POV and bits and pieces of the band’s history, as well as their personal histories, are revealed as the book progresses. It did take me a while to warm up to them as a couple as there’s so much about them that shouldn’t work, but it somehow does, and in the end, I was satisfied with the state of their HEA. Was it a typical one? No, because while both Alec and Harlow heal a bit together over the course of the book, they’re not the sort of people to have a fairy tale ending. As for cons, the pacing is a bit uneven and it does feel at times like everyone is just waiting around for Silas to die, and the flowery language was at times over the top for me.
Overall, this was exactly the angst-fest I needed. Perfect if you love messy, broken people having sex and falling in love!
I received this book for free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.
“Messy” is a very apt description for this book! First off, it’s an age gap romance between an aging rock star and the daughter of his ex-bandmate who’s dying of cancer, with all the content warnings that implies. Secondly, both main characters are, well, messy – they’re broken, with lots of sharp edges that don’t fit well together.
“What did you plan?”
“To give you a message.”
“What was this, then?”
I like that he’s on his knees. I wonder what that says about me. “Revenge, possibly. Acting out, certainly.”
Harlow’s life in San Francisco – such as it is – has been put on hold while her father, Silas, is dying. She’s accompanied him back to England, his birthplace and where he was once part of The Skies. Silas left the band before she was even born, but its breakup and the aftermath has tainted every part of Harlow’s life, though her father has always refused to talk about his past. Alec and Silas, her father, had been close as brothers, before Silas’ actions led to the breakup, so the natural thing for Harlow to do is to break into his dressing room and confront him. She’s near obsessed with him, having analyzed everything available about the band – and him, like that he wore sunglasses to all his interviews in the 90s – in hopes of learning more about what made her father the way she is, and so made her the way she is. Meanwhile, Alec is trying to get the band back together for one last benefit concert. It’s not just the cause, but also the opportunity to rewrite the ending of The Skies. The overwhelming attraction between them is just an added complication. But is there anything between them besides their complicated relationships with Silas?
“This will only go bad if you think years makes you the one in charge.”
“Christ, no one is in charge of you. Maybe not even you.”
This is an angsty, steamy read between a pair of very flawed characters. Both had difficult, abusive childhoods, and while Alec has come to terms with it in his own way, Harlow is still very much in the midst of figuring out who she is and what she wants. While the beginning of their relationship is centered on how they both interact with Silas, they discover that their broken pieces fit together – mostly through lots and lots of sex. It’s definitely a taboo romance on several levels, with both the age gap and the fact that Alec was Harlow’s dad’s best friend turned enemy turned unlikely host, but both are addressed well in the book. The story is told from both Harlow and Alec’s POV and bits and pieces of the band’s history, as well as their personal histories, are revealed as the book progresses. It did take me a while to warm up to them as a couple as there’s so much about them that shouldn’t work, but it somehow does, and in the end, I was satisfied with the state of their HEA. Was it a typical one? No, because while both Alec and Harlow heal a bit together over the course of the book, they’re not the sort of people to have a fairy tale ending. As for cons, the pacing is a bit uneven and it does feel at times like everyone is just waiting around for Silas to die, and the flowery language was at times over the top for me.
Overall, this was exactly the angst-fest I needed. Perfect if you love messy, broken people having sex and falling in love!
I received this book for free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.
January 11, 2023
I bought Katie Porter’s Messy some time ago when I saw folks on Twitter talking about it. I read it in those dark days of late December when I was stressing about all the end of year stuff, my inner perfectionist was yelling at me about the sorry state of my baked goods, and I was missing my dad and the relationship I wish we had. Why am I bringing up my dad in a review of an erotic romance? Because a central element of Messy is that Harlow’s father is dying and she is grasping for any bit of connection and closure she can get with him.
Harlow’s father, Silas, is emotionally closed off and verbally abusive to pretty much everyone around him. He was a founding member of a once popular, now defunct British rock band, but he moved to California in a huff when he was kicked out of the band. Harlow did not grow up with the band, except for their ghosts. This is important because when Harlow meets Alex, they have an emotionally and erotically charged encounter, and then Harlow tells Alex that his former best friend and band mate is back in England and dying.
Messy is fraught with emotion. The characters and their relationships are complicated. Harlow yearns for intimacy, but keeps Alex at an emotional arms length while starting a sexual relationship with him. At the center of their dance is Silas, who refuses to give either the emotional closure they want. And yet, Porter gives us small glimpses of Silas that humanize him, though I wouldn’t go so far as to say Silas is redeemed. Harlow has to figure out how to find peace with herself about her relationship with her father, and how to let go of the desire for answers. Despite her best attempts to keep feelings out of her relationship with Alex, he becomes a sanctuary for her, not a self inflicted wound.
Katie Porter is actually two people (neither are the Congresswoman), Lorelei Brown and Carrie Lofty. Today I learned that Lorelei Brown has transitioned to hospice care. If you are looking for a gut punch of a read softened by sexy times and a happy for now ending, I highly recommend it.
CW: cancer, death of a parent, caregiving for a dying parent, verbal altercations, emotional abuse, toxic parent, past drug and alcohol use
Harlow’s father, Silas, is emotionally closed off and verbally abusive to pretty much everyone around him. He was a founding member of a once popular, now defunct British rock band, but he moved to California in a huff when he was kicked out of the band. Harlow did not grow up with the band, except for their ghosts. This is important because when Harlow meets Alex, they have an emotionally and erotically charged encounter, and then Harlow tells Alex that his former best friend and band mate is back in England and dying.
Messy is fraught with emotion. The characters and their relationships are complicated. Harlow yearns for intimacy, but keeps Alex at an emotional arms length while starting a sexual relationship with him. At the center of their dance is Silas, who refuses to give either the emotional closure they want. And yet, Porter gives us small glimpses of Silas that humanize him, though I wouldn’t go so far as to say Silas is redeemed. Harlow has to figure out how to find peace with herself about her relationship with her father, and how to let go of the desire for answers. Despite her best attempts to keep feelings out of her relationship with Alex, he becomes a sanctuary for her, not a self inflicted wound.
Katie Porter is actually two people (neither are the Congresswoman), Lorelei Brown and Carrie Lofty. Today I learned that Lorelei Brown has transitioned to hospice care. If you are looking for a gut punch of a read softened by sexy times and a happy for now ending, I highly recommend it.
CW: cancer, death of a parent, caregiving for a dying parent, verbal altercations, emotional abuse, toxic parent, past drug and alcohol use
January 2, 2020
Review copy provided for an honest review
I was excited to read this angsty, rockstar romance. It starts off with a bang, moves at a slow pace after that. There's lots of mysteries surrounding this couple but the resolution to most of them aren't provided in the book. Overall, it is a quick read that comes to happy end for the couple but an unsatisfying end for the reader.
I was excited to read this angsty, rockstar romance. It starts off with a bang, moves at a slow pace after that. There's lots of mysteries surrounding this couple but the resolution to most of them aren't provided in the book. Overall, it is a quick read that comes to happy end for the couple but an unsatisfying end for the reader.
April 16, 2020
Harlow had known of Alec Davies all her life. He was the reason why her dad wasn’t a member of The Skies hasn’t been for more than twenty-five years. Alec was known as the devil in her house. Harlow had to pull in a lot of family favors to be let in 01here. She was in Alec’s dressing room. Harlow kissed Alec then Alec toke over the kiss. Harlow thought she had been bringing him a message, but Harlow guesses she had been fooling herself. Honestly, she’d been looking for the this, by confronting the dragon of her father’s fairy tales to see if he’s as bad as she ‘d always been told. Or if the man Harlow had binged on in the YouTube app was the real one. Harlow wanted a way to lash out at the past, the one she’d gone looking for. Alec gets Harlow off orally. The she redresses herself and Harlow said she hadn’t planned that, and Alec asked what she had planned. Harlow told Alec to give him a message. Then Alec asked what that had been, and she said Revenge possibly. Then Harlow told Alec her dad had cancer and not long to live. And she told him you used to know her father. That Alec used to call her father the brother he never had. Then Alec breathes “Silas” Harlow sees the moment Alec realizes he has the taste of his best friends’ daughter on his mouth. Harlow then left. The next day Alex comes to their hotel to see Silas. Alec asked to make Silas’s porridge Silas was to have for his breakfast and Harlow let him. Alec was surprised Sirus was staying at a hotel. He’d previously been highly dismissive of most material things and signs of success. He’d been dismissive of Alec and The Skies. Alec takes the breakfast tray to Sirus his old brother, old competitor. Sirus does recognize Alec and said he couldn’t believe Alec had come. Once upon a tome Alex respected Silas above all others, the man The Skies needed the most. He would have promised everything the fairy tales demanded. The Sirus became an ogre. Then Sirus left them. They made more albums but it all still fell apart after thirteen years. Harlow watches Alec come out of her father’s room She says a plea to herself “Please God, tell me that dad was as mean to Alec Davies as he’d always been to me.” Alec told Harlow he wants to move Silas to his townhome, but Harlow said no they didn’t need his charity. Harlow added” where he goes, I go too.” Harlow felt Sirus owed her that much, her hurt her and scared her and turned a blind eye to every emotional hurt he’d warred on her.
I had mixed emotions on this book. Why did Harlow stay with her father when all her did was hurt her? Why did she start an affair with a man her father’s age I don’t know this just didn’t make a lot of sense to me? I enjoyed some of this book but for the most part I didn’t really care for it. So, I will give it a three. I did like Alec was willing to take in his old friend and daughter. He eventually slept with said daughter but why he wanted her she was young but his best friends’ daughter I don’t know I just have mixed feelings as this shows.
I had mixed emotions on this book. Why did Harlow stay with her father when all her did was hurt her? Why did she start an affair with a man her father’s age I don’t know this just didn’t make a lot of sense to me? I enjoyed some of this book but for the most part I didn’t really care for it. So, I will give it a three. I did like Alec was willing to take in his old friend and daughter. He eventually slept with said daughter but why he wanted her she was young but his best friends’ daughter I don’t know I just have mixed feelings as this shows.
February 10, 2020
This review was originally posted on my review blog Deanna Reads Books
I wanted to like this one way more than I did, like there were things I liked about it, but other times I just didn't understand the appeal the couple had to each other. It felt more like a sexual attraction and the actual love stuff just didn't sit right with me. I was so bummed because I do really want to read age gap stuff.
I do want to point out that if cancer or the idea of death of a parent is a trigger for you, you might want to stay away from this book. A key part of this book is that Harlowe's dad is dying and he wants to do it in his home of England. Which means he has to get reunited with his ex-best friend. I liked the stuff between Alec and Harlowe's dad. I'm glad they kind of have some sense of closure, but Harlowe's relationship with her dad was...while realistic, it annoyed me too.
There is a ton of sex in this book, which I don't mind at all, but sometimes I felt like it was lifeless. Like it was just there to be there. I just really didn't like these two together at all. I didn't get a sense that they really had feelings for each other too. I liked Alec a lot, and I felt like we got Harlowe's point of view a little too much, and I wanted more of Alec. Even though we got more of Harlow, I just didn't like her or understand her. She fell really flat for me as a character.
I really hate when books don't work for me! I feel bad giving negative reviews, but this one just didn't work for me. And it felt like I had zero reasons to really explain why when I was reading it. I'm so bummed! I might try another book by this author down the line (I believe in giving author's second chances) but this one just was a let down for me.
*I received a review copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
I wanted to like this one way more than I did, like there were things I liked about it, but other times I just didn't understand the appeal the couple had to each other. It felt more like a sexual attraction and the actual love stuff just didn't sit right with me. I was so bummed because I do really want to read age gap stuff.
I do want to point out that if cancer or the idea of death of a parent is a trigger for you, you might want to stay away from this book. A key part of this book is that Harlowe's dad is dying and he wants to do it in his home of England. Which means he has to get reunited with his ex-best friend. I liked the stuff between Alec and Harlowe's dad. I'm glad they kind of have some sense of closure, but Harlowe's relationship with her dad was...while realistic, it annoyed me too.
There is a ton of sex in this book, which I don't mind at all, but sometimes I felt like it was lifeless. Like it was just there to be there. I just really didn't like these two together at all. I didn't get a sense that they really had feelings for each other too. I liked Alec a lot, and I felt like we got Harlowe's point of view a little too much, and I wanted more of Alec. Even though we got more of Harlow, I just didn't like her or understand her. She fell really flat for me as a character.
I really hate when books don't work for me! I feel bad giving negative reviews, but this one just didn't work for me. And it felt like I had zero reasons to really explain why when I was reading it. I'm so bummed! I might try another book by this author down the line (I believe in giving author's second chances) but this one just was a let down for me.
*I received a review copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
March 30, 2020
This book felt like a performance; there was no buildup between two characters getting to know one another, so I still don’t understand the forced intimacy between Alec and Harlow. Since the beginning, it felt like I was stepping into a sequel or a book where these characters had met before because these characters went right at it in regards to their vapid conversations and their random bouts of sex frenzies.
I did expect the sex in this book because the synopsis read as an erotic novel, however the execution of the sex scenes were out of nowhere with no mutual chemistry felt between Alec and Harlow. I kept wanting the story to be either just the story or just the sex because while the writing was consistent, the blend of sex and story did not mesh seamlessly.
You never are told why Harlow is Alec’s—a man over two decades Harlow’s senior— muse. I was expecting a titillating story about a forbidden couple coming together, but the mystery of Alec and Harlow getting together was botched from the start, i.e. nonexistent.
I received an ARC from the author and publisher in exchange for an honest review.
I did expect the sex in this book because the synopsis read as an erotic novel, however the execution of the sex scenes were out of nowhere with no mutual chemistry felt between Alec and Harlow. I kept wanting the story to be either just the story or just the sex because while the writing was consistent, the blend of sex and story did not mesh seamlessly.
You never are told why Harlow is Alec’s—a man over two decades Harlow’s senior— muse. I was expecting a titillating story about a forbidden couple coming together, but the mystery of Alec and Harlow getting together was botched from the start, i.e. nonexistent.
I received an ARC from the author and publisher in exchange for an honest review.
March 29, 2020
Thanks for giving me the opportunity to review this book. I will also post reviews on Goodreads, Amazon, Barnes and Noble and Bookbub.
http://www.cocktailsandbooks.com
Thanks to the author for providing a copy of this book via Cocktails and Books and Netgalley. The opinions expressed are my own.
Messy is a story about an aging rock star and a much younger woman. The reason I wanted to read this book is because I enjoy reading about older men with a younger woman and especially, when it is about a musician. The two main characters, Alec and Harlow are both flawed and must come to terms with all their issues before they can learn to love another person. Their relationship is also taboo, as Alec and Harlow's father we’re best friends and bandmates, but their relationship changed and now they are enemies. This is a steamy story full of angst and at times, feels unrealistic. By the end of the book I liked Alec and Harlow, but it took me a while to warm up to them. It is worth taking some out and reading this emotional and sexy story.
http://www.cocktailsandbooks.com
Thanks to the author for providing a copy of this book via Cocktails and Books and Netgalley. The opinions expressed are my own.
Messy is a story about an aging rock star and a much younger woman. The reason I wanted to read this book is because I enjoy reading about older men with a younger woman and especially, when it is about a musician. The two main characters, Alec and Harlow are both flawed and must come to terms with all their issues before they can learn to love another person. Their relationship is also taboo, as Alec and Harlow's father we’re best friends and bandmates, but their relationship changed and now they are enemies. This is a steamy story full of angst and at times, feels unrealistic. By the end of the book I liked Alec and Harlow, but it took me a while to warm up to them. It is worth taking some out and reading this emotional and sexy story.
February 26, 2020
MESSY's first chapter is a mission statement: Aging rock star can't resist younger woman who he finds in his dressing room. She's a bit of an emotional wreck. There's earth shattering oral sex before she reveals she's the daughter of his estranged former bandmate who's now dying. Yeah, it's messy.
This book is super angsty and super hot. Harlow is dealing with her difficult dad's terminal cancer, her deep emotional wounds, and desire to more know about her past. Alec is managing a reunion of his band while welcoming his estranged bandmate into his house to die. They're both dealing with insane attraction for the other.
There's a lot here and it's solid. One of the things that makes this book special is that it doesn't feel tidy at the end - both characters are still going to be flawed and dealing with stuff - but that's completely appropriate for a book with this title.
I received an ARC of this book for review via NetGalley.
This book is super angsty and super hot. Harlow is dealing with her difficult dad's terminal cancer, her deep emotional wounds, and desire to more know about her past. Alec is managing a reunion of his band while welcoming his estranged bandmate into his house to die. They're both dealing with insane attraction for the other.
There's a lot here and it's solid. One of the things that makes this book special is that it doesn't feel tidy at the end - both characters are still going to be flawed and dealing with stuff - but that's completely appropriate for a book with this title.
I received an ARC of this book for review via NetGalley.
February 6, 2020
Years ago, Harlow’s dad was in the famous band and with a falling out he left and moved to America. When her dying father insists on returning to England, Harlow reaches out to Alec not sure what would happen between the two. What she didn’t expect was an instant attraction between her and Alec, Alec finds himself moving Harlow and her father into his home.
Things are messy between rock star Alec Davies and Harlow Tate, yet they can not deny the passion they have even though it could have disastrous results.
At the beginning of this forbidden love story, I felt thrown into their story, a little lost, however, I was quickly drawn into their romance. Katie Porter has written a story of two people who find an everlasting love.
Things are messy between rock star Alec Davies and Harlow Tate, yet they can not deny the passion they have even though it could have disastrous results.
At the beginning of this forbidden love story, I felt thrown into their story, a little lost, however, I was quickly drawn into their romance. Katie Porter has written a story of two people who find an everlasting love.
February 19, 2020
Is it uh…. hot in here?! No?? Just me? Oh, okay. This book brought the heat, man and I am HERE for it! Alec and Harlow meet as strangers who turn out to be connected pretty deeply, and Alec has no clue who Harlow is. After he finds out who she is and why she’s there things get interesting. There are boundaries put into place, but even those can’t stop things from getting insanely hot. It’s not long before said boundaries get blown to pieces and lines are crossed and people who shouldn’t be in love are in love. This book has some pretty deep and sad moments, some exceptionally funny moments, some downright sappy moments, and of course… lots of sex. What more could you want?! I loved this story.
November 4, 2023
Although I enjoyed the age gap of the protagonists, the story has many gaps in the plot. I didn't quite understand the relationship between her father and Alec exactly. From Harlow's perspective, I understood that the father was a shit everytime with everybody. I didn't quite understand why Harlow's father wanted to be hosted by Alec in his last period of life. But let's say that otherwise the story made no sense.
Harlow and Alec's relationship was... Just ok. She had nothing to offer, but he (being a man her father's age) had more experience with everything. Apart from sex, I didn't feel any other connection between the characters. Yes, the death of Harlow's father brought her and his childhood best friend closer together.
Harlow and Alec's relationship was... Just ok. She had nothing to offer, but he (being a man her father's age) had more experience with everything. Apart from sex, I didn't feel any other connection between the characters. Yes, the death of Harlow's father brought her and his childhood best friend closer together.
April 17, 2020
During his earlier life her father Silas was a rockstar, he was the bass player of The Skies until he walked away, Harlow never knew that man, just the bitter miserable version she is looking at now. Silas is dying and he wants to return to the UK, he expects Harlow to put her life and career on hold. On arrival in London she manages to call in some favours until she is standing in Alec Davies' dressing room. She tells him that Silas is in London and that he has come home to die.
An emotional story that will have you reaching for a tissue. With thanks to NetGalley and Lorelie Brown for the early read.
An emotional story that will have you reaching for a tissue. With thanks to NetGalley and Lorelie Brown for the early read.
February 27, 2023
rep: bisexual hero
cw: former drug addiction, cancer, parental death, mention of drug overdose, grief, mental health issues
I think this one balanced the heavier topics with the steamy romance very well. I’m not a huge fan of rockstar heroes, and I’m picky on the dad’s (ex)best-friend books I read, but this story really worked for me. The rockstar part wasn’t overtaken by the main romance, the hero hasn’t been in the scene in years which means that his wild past is too. And even though he was friends with the heroine’s dad, he never met her since there was a falling out. Now all we’re left with is an age gap that I really enjoyed. I enjoyed the rest too, as soon as they meet he’s eating her out so I was giddy for the rest of what it promised. I’m not completely sold on how their relationship progressed, but I’m happy for their HFN.
cw: former drug addiction, cancer, parental death, mention of drug overdose, grief, mental health issues
I think this one balanced the heavier topics with the steamy romance very well. I’m not a huge fan of rockstar heroes, and I’m picky on the dad’s (ex)best-friend books I read, but this story really worked for me. The rockstar part wasn’t overtaken by the main romance, the hero hasn’t been in the scene in years which means that his wild past is too. And even though he was friends with the heroine’s dad, he never met her since there was a falling out. Now all we’re left with is an age gap that I really enjoyed. I enjoyed the rest too, as soon as they meet he’s eating her out so I was giddy for the rest of what it promised. I’m not completely sold on how their relationship progressed, but I’m happy for their HFN.
March 18, 2020
The synopsis was what made me buy this book. I knew that I would have some uninterrupted pool time to read it so I bought it. Right from the first chapter I was hooked. It was sexy AF. Alec and Harlow had this tension between them that made me think they would do it at any moment and they kind of did.
Yes, the story itself could have been fleshed out a little more, but you know what? The world is crazy right now and a book filled with some hot sex between an aging rockstar and his ex bandmate’s daughter was exactly what I needed.
Yes, the story itself could have been fleshed out a little more, but you know what? The world is crazy right now and a book filled with some hot sex between an aging rockstar and his ex bandmate’s daughter was exactly what I needed.
April 7, 2025
I'm not sure why this has such a low rating. This was brilliantly written and more honest than most romances out there. Not that I don't love the other kind also, but I think a lot of people were expecting more exposition or internal thoughts explaining every emotion but life isn't really like that let's be honest. It's messy just like the title. Grief is messy, caregiving is traumatic and sometimes relationships start with what seems like random physical need. There's no perfect closure. This was beautiful and poignant and honest and real. Thank you Katie Porter.
March 18, 2020
if you like insta-lust and characters/relationships that exist without any explanation or reality, then be my guest. It would have been very hot if I had any idea of why anyone was doing anything. There’s a lot of internal angsting but very, very little substance. Should have DNFed but kept hoping there would be some sort of character explanation or breakthrough. There was not. One star for the sexy times.
March 18, 2020
The blurb alone should prepare you for the crazy rollercoaster ride between riding his face to the townhouse hospice, it's just curiosity that wonders how this all plays out. This is definitely a story with many layers, add a rockstar, even an aging one and all bets are off. Messy turns sexy but there's no way it's gonna be boring.
I received an advanced copy of this book from Netgalley for my honest review.
I received an advanced copy of this book from Netgalley for my honest review.
December 17, 2022
3.5
Age gap romance between an ex-superstar singer of a band called The Skies and the daughter one of the band mates, who is dearly sick.
I really like the concept! BUT I think this book would’ve been better if there was more to it. I need more depth, more unf, more!!! The dad felt like a side plot that brought drama and whiny-ness.
I love the rockstar age-gap theme, but I don’t know if I personally like the girl dating her dads best friend from his band???? EEEK
Age gap romance between an ex-superstar singer of a band called The Skies and the daughter one of the band mates, who is dearly sick.
I really like the concept! BUT I think this book would’ve been better if there was more to it. I need more depth, more unf, more!!! The dad felt like a side plot that brought drama and whiny-ness.
I love the rockstar age-gap theme, but I don’t know if I personally like the girl dating her dads best friend from his band???? EEEK
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 30, 2023
This was a quick, free audiobook listen for me. I thought it was an interesting journey the FMC experienced, grieving her father as he was dying and exploring her relationship with the older MMC. I do think this wasn't fleshed out enough and I do have a hard time believing someone who hates herself as much as the FMC, and someone was worldly and sexually promiscuous as the MMC would end up together. I fully appreciate that this was a shorter novel.
July 24, 2024
I haven't decided if I'm going to finish... there's only about an hour left.
The male narrator is this was not it.. sounded like a elderly British dude and I couldn't stop from picturing Michael Caine.
FMC: She's whiney, a bit immature and all over the map. Her dad is a dick who treats her like crap, she goes on about how he wasn't a great dad and then she acts out like a teenager.. but she still caters to him.
MMC: Meh. Forgettable
The male narrator is this was not it.. sounded like a elderly British dude and I couldn't stop from picturing Michael Caine.
FMC: She's whiney, a bit immature and all over the map. Her dad is a dick who treats her like crap, she goes on about how he wasn't a great dad and then she acts out like a teenager.. but she still caters to him.
MMC: Meh. Forgettable
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