Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock

Rate this book
From the mind of author John Marszalkowski comes nonsense and foolishness at its very finest. Polished and primed, poppycock and spiels come from a wide variety of one-sided arguments, essays, and micro-stories. Everyone can relate to the topics of these hilarious rants—ranging from naps and being fat to assimilation and feminism. Whether you're looking for a good laugh or a quick read, this is just right for those of you with a short attention span and a little snarky wit. This compilation of stories is incredible—or uncredible—you decide.

160 pages, Paperback

Published November 5, 2019

2 people are currently reading
66 people want to read

About the author

John Edward Marszalkowski

3 books96 followers
"John Edward Marszalkowski is a man of many talents. One of which is pretending to be stupid. Though his academic achievements are limited, his capacities are not. In actuality, he is a man of great consideration and compassion. By engaging with life in this way, he enhances the lives of those who know him." - Matthew Kopf, Esq.

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
10 (58%)
4 stars
3 (17%)
3 stars
3 (17%)
2 stars
0 (0%)
1 star
1 (5%)
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
Profile Image for Miranda Reads.
1,815 reviews165k followers
November 12, 2025
description
Is it weird that I regret giving the last book 5-stars, solely because I'm unable to rate this one any higher? Ah. What the hell. 5.5 stars.
You can search the internet...But I wouldn't encourage it.
John Marszalkowski's are quite.. .unusual ...to say the least, and this one does not disappoint!

It's a bit hard to know where to start.

Much like his first one, this book contains a series of loosely connected rants - covering everything and anything - from sex appeal to skunks to feminism to Christian guilt.
Love, fear and respect the skunk in its current form. It's not the perfect animal, but nobody is perfect.
John designed each chapter to be wholly different from the others, thus you really could pick up this book, flip to a random chapter and read it with no problem.
I can't be the only one who thought of this....However, I don't want to be discouraged, and so I won't Google it.
His sense of humor really matches mine - there were so many times I would laugh out loud (okay, more like a nose-snort but hey, it was genuine).

As before, I absolutely loved the chapter titles.

How could you read something like this:
Your Unhappiness Is Stupid; Time For A Nap
or this:
Everyone Is A Feminist Until Proven Jerks
and not expect a good time?

And, it was so fun to realize he and I have the same taste when it comes to screen-time.
When I watch those reality TV shows that showcase examples of extreme hoarding, it always makes me feel better about myself.
One of my favorite things is how he incorporates his family into the book. There's just little tidbits here and there, but they are so gosh-darn relatable.
I highly recommend having your mother proofread your writing. Mothers have been practicing their whole lives at criticizing their children's choices
All in all, if you are looking for a good time - pick this one up!

Oh, and also - one of my favorite moments was the very end.

First of all, he always makes the audience feel so gosh-dang good about it:
Let me be the first to congratulate you on reading this
WHOLE thing! Or at least skipping chapters you
didn’t like until you reached this one: THE FINAL
CHAPTER!
(I really wish more authors would do that).

AND he addressed so many commonly-asked questions and requests from his first book. I won't leak them all here, but this one was my fave:
A request for a scratch-and-sniff book: I wish it could be. May I suggest turning to your favorite page of the book, and placing onto it a single drop of vanilla extract?
Ahhh...if only I wasn't reading the digital copy.

With many, many thanks to the author for sending me an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

All quotes come from an uncorrected proof and are subject to change upon publication


YouTube | Blog | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook | Snapchat @miranda_reads
Profile Image for John Marszalkowski.
Author 3 books96 followers
November 6, 2019
Hi.

I wrote this book, so you might not trust my rating of five-stars. I'd like you to read it and then rate it. A rating from you would be much more believable. Why would anyone trust me? I obviously want you to think it's amazing so that you'll read it. But if you read it and think it isn't hot garbage, and you tell people it isn't hot garbage, that would be really appreciated. Appreciated by me, specifically. Exclusively by me, actually. I can't imagine anyone else besides me has a horse in this race. No one else cares if you rate this book good or bad. Well, maybe my mom does. I bet my mom wants you to like it. She's required by the code of mom ethics to say it's good. She just doesn't want to be the only person saying it's good. That would make her look like a crazy person.

I'm pretty proud of this book. Five stars worth of pride. Please consider adding it to your shelf.
Profile Image for Emily Malek.
238 reviews9 followers
October 1, 2019
Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock Book Review

Full disclosure: I was given an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.

There are certain writers who are comfortable creating stories in only one genre or format. This is typically not a problem as long as they are able to expand their horizons or diversify what they tackle within said genre. John Mazsalkowski skillfully expands his thoughts within the informal-essay format with his second official book "Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock".

In "Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock", John Marzsalkowski rants about his life and opinions (even if he is not credible on every topic) in the informal-essay format that is just as cohesive and self-assured as his previous book How to Punch Kids in Bathrooms. However, it does not have the same element of surprise like "Buy My Book, Not Because You Should, But Because I’d Like Some Money", yet this is not the first John Marszalkowski-penned book that I have ever read. I know that he is going to rant about something, but I never know what and how. When I do find out, it always puts a smile on my face. It is like that one friend who always has something to say, but one does not know what they will discuss and how.

Some of my favorite parts are the titles and the illustrations. For the titles, Marsalkowski uses names like “White History Month Should Not Exist,” “Your Unhappiness is Stupid; Time for a Nap,” and “Everyone is a Feminist Until Proven Jerks.” These intrigued me as chapter titles should, and they accurately describe their content. The illustrations used at the beginning of each chapter were also funny and cute. In the chapter about skunks, the drawing depicts Marszalkowski in cartoon form with an adorable-looking skunk in what appears to be a dumpster. My favorite image was within the chapter entitled “My First Attempt at Fiction,” which shows Adderall covered in a Smarties-like wrapping paper.

Speaking of Marszalkowski’s attempts at writing fiction, he does this a few times throughout the book. They are admirable efforts, especially the story about a teenage boy named Rad who tries to talk to a girl whom he likes. I also loved his attempt at writing a 50,000-word book in one month, and how he expresses his frustrations in diary form. This sets the tone for the book to be intentionally full of short chapters that permits his ramblings, and that one can read out of order if they want to.

And if one was wondering, “Hey Emily, does John have any worksheets like he did in Buy My Book, Not Because You Should, But Because I’d Like Some Money?”

Yes reader, he does. In fact, he has three! They appear in the chapters, “Math Class Could Have Been More Fun,” “Assholes, And The Rest,” and “Everyone is a Feminist Until Proven Jerks.” They were just as engaging as the ones featured in his first book.

Marszalkowski also demonstrates his sincerity in honest and funny ways. Christy Hall Watson does the foreword and talks about how he would make her feel comfortable whenever he was filming her slam story events. According to her, he even got pizza for everybody working that night, refused to take any money, and chatted about random stuff with her and anybody who happened to be in the green room. This made me like him even more. Additionally, Marszalkowski has a dedication page to his still living brother as an apology for not mentioning him in his first book.

Overall, "Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock" is a good book that expands upon the brand of the one John Marszalkowski. Like with Buy My Book, it may not be for everyone, yet it is more palatable than the prior book. If anything, I would recommend this book to readers who are looking to get into his work. It is something not quite completely different from his previous books, yet it is still unique enough to a person not familiar with his past work.
Profile Image for Gabrielle Olexa.
Author 1 book26 followers
November 9, 2019
Full disclosure: While spending time on Twitter, John and I crossed paths. I commented on a tweet of his and he responded. Sometime later I received a DM from him. I almost always delete DMs because they are usually attached to weird, creepy dudes, but for some reason, I decided to engage in the conversation. I guess he sounded interesting and genuine enough because that conversation led to me being in possession of his book. He did not ask me to read his book or to review it. It was merely a gift with no strings attached. And this is my review.

Have you ever wanted to get inside of someone's head and hear what they're thinking? I've obviously never met John, but after reading "Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock" I now feel as though I've gotten to know him on a certain level. An author reveals parts of himself when he writes a book, but especially so when it's a literal running conscious. That's what this book is, for most of the chapters anyway - little pieces of John's mind for us to enjoy and ponder.

There's something here for everyone.

Some humor - not as much as perhaps I thought there would be based on a few indications, but the fact I even chuckled at all means there are some legitimate hahas. I don't have a sense of humor at all, so I feel something has to be pretty special if it makes me laugh.

Small tastes of fiction - John states it's not really his cup of tea, but I could see him going deeper down that rabbit hole. Maybe I'll get creative one day and finish off the stories as he suggests.

Some chatter about skunks - They really are cute little critters. But yeah, that stinky part of them is a real deal-breaker. I ran over a dead skunk once, and I can attest to how long that stench stays around. It's somewhere close to forever. I felt bad for his predicament, but I laughed in our shared and lasting terror.

There's even some social commentary. If you've ever wondered whether you're a feminist, a real special jerk, or how you should feel about European festivals and Black History Month, John will walk you through all that - at least his perspective of it.

And a whole bunch of other random stuff, some of it serious, some of it like throwing a bouncy ball as hard as one can against a wall to see what its trajectory will end up being. But most importantly, it's honest, something we surely don't get a lot of these days.

You don't have to read this book from cover to cover, but I did. You may read it in spurts, a section here and there. You may go back and read a few you fancy. But my guess is that you'll enjoy most of it. Happy reading.
Profile Image for Deedra.
3,933 reviews40 followers
February 13, 2020
Hmmn,This was a book of rants by a guy with a blog.I didn't find it that fun or interesting.He has adhd,so I understand how his mind works.I follow familys creativity and raves on fb daily.Narration by Mandi Kaye was good.I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.' 
Profile Image for Amy Shannon.
Author 156 books134 followers
November 6, 2019
Loved this book!

I found it interesting to leap inside the mind (the ADHD mind) of Marszalkowski. Something about this book, makes you feel like you're sitting down with the author, and listening to the rants and perspective of the thoughts and ideas, no more like Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock that come from his mind. Just a browse through the table of contents will give the reader an idea of what is to come, but when you get there, it's so much more than that. An amazingly unique rant and perspective, and I loved reading his thoughts, and knew I was definitely hooked. I couldn't put it down, and several times I read the same passage, repeatedly. I laughed out loud, and nodded a great deal. I look forward to whatever new thoughts, ideas, spiels, come out of the mind of Marszalkowski. This book is definitely recommended by Amy's Bookshelf Reviews.
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
21 reviews
December 27, 2019
John is a very talented human who needs to express his thoughts in some creative way; music, writing, etc. His third book, “Uncredible Thoughts: Essays, Spiels, and Poppycock” is written similarly to the other work he’s done. If you don’t like the chapter you are on, you don’t have to read it. You can move onto the next because each chapter is a stand-alone piece of work. While I can’t say every single chapter held my full attention, I can say that the chapters that I was intrigued by were magnificent. Here is a real person, talking about real things; things we all experience in our lives. Struggles, pain, love, curiosity – there isn’t a topic he doesn’t discuss, and he does so with humor. He is the Chris Farley of authors.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.