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238 pages, Kindle Edition
First published May 13, 2018
I’m in a hacking mood after reading this and forgive my inadequate attempts to cool off before reviewing. This is the first book I read from this author. I was looking for a historical romance with a self-made hero that muscled his way up the ranks of society. Currently the
has a 4.14 rating on GR and after reading the reviews, I thought to give this a try.
Well first off, I didn’t pick this up because of the title, since it is misleading. I don’t understand why the author wanted to draw attention to the rank of “Viscount” in the title, because Lord Shaw was, in essence, anything but. If anything, Lady Fanny Dashwood was the party associated with nobility, coming from a well-bred family with the squeamish upbringing to prove it and their accompanied objections when she all but announced to them that she is to marry him. The fact that he inherited a patched-up title from some cousin he never met, (twice removed, of course), had nothing to offer to the plot. “Lord” Shaw didn’t speak, act or even aspire to carry himself as a member of nobility. In fact, the first time he talked to Lady Fanny in the book he intended to propose to her. Like this:
“I am not very good at this,” he said gruffly. “I have never done this before.”Be still my heart. I couldn’t help but feel that the awkwardness would continue on in their story and I was not disappointed. Both parties had enough of it to make most dialogue jarring and cringeworthy. As for the character of “Lord” Shaw, if he expressed even the slightest desire to mould into the ranks of nobility or even go against it, anything for characterization’s sake, I would have found him interesting. Alas, male lead with no depth, no scenes other than with his friend Percy to sit down and discuss the circumstances or with Lady Fanny. From Fanny’s PoV, most of the time “Lord” Shaw was that of a lower class but still admirable working man, with too much of a sexual appetite that she thought she failed to match.
Now, the Jane Austen references kept piling on to the point I was rolling my eyes heavenward.
1. Lady Frances Elizabeth Dashwood, Fanny to her friends, aka the heroine of “The Viscount and I” carries the name of two quite prominent characters in Jane Austen’s works. Lady Frances “Fanny” Dashwood being the only sister of Robert and Edward Ferrars in “Sense and Sensibility”. I will refrain from where the “Elizabeth” part of her name is found in Jane Austen’s heroines, since it is quite a common and beloved name in historical romances. BUT pile them both together in ONE heroine and I was cringing so much I needed a dentist’s appointment. Like, please, to all authors of HRs worldwide, research is your friend. One search on google can prevent you from folly.
2. Lord Shaw has an estate they plan to visit in (where else?) …Derbyshire. The famed area where Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice Mr. Darcy owns his estate. Good thing I didn’t see “Pemberley” written down or I would have had a fit of the vapours.
3. Darcy is the name of Lady Fanny’s sister-in-law.
4. Camden Place in Bath (of all places) where Lady Fanny’s mother retreats, is the place where Jane Austen’s heroine, Anne Elliott lived with her father in Persuasion.
Please don’t make me go on, I was planning to have lunch after writing the review and it is now clearly a mistake. There’s a difference between paying homage to a literary legend, and carelessly piling on names and places from their books into your own. Even if this author strove to honor Jane Austen’s work with the references, there is one too many littering this story, and it only made me want to disrespect this book. I understand that Jane Austen has influenced numerous authors, and there are countless books that even resort to flat out copy-pasting the formulas set by Austen’s stories. But for the love of all that’s holy, readers are not stupid to not pick up not one, not two, but as many Jane Austen name pluck-outs your literary agent thinks you can get away with before someone feels compelled to call you out. Yes, I’m flaming mad because I hated seeing this pile-on, but rest assured, deep down I am a really nice person. *insert kittens and rainbows gifs*
To the writing. There are a lot of modern writing mistakes that readers can forgive in a Historical Romance. I found myself eyerolling over most of the trite dialogue between the characters. There were passages I had to read over and again to get to what they actually meant when they spoke, paragraphs later.
By 37% of the story, Fanny’s goal of finally marrying is fulfilled and here come the exposition dumps. By the time their wedding night scene is on page things are so awkward and the lack of chemistry between the leads is palpable. No tense build-up, no flow in the writing, and Lady Fanny true to her inhibitions sets a damper in the whole affair. “Lord” Shaw like the placated male that he is, yes you read me correct, there is NO ALPHA MALE to be found in this story, he simply goes along. What genteel Fanny wants, Fanny gets, aka bedding in the dark, nothing “indecent” to be done because… awkwardness, and the inevitable comparison between respectable ladies and wanton mistresses gets an insert enough to ruffle the feathers of the heroine.
Speaking of bedding, I stopped counting after the TENTH time I read the word carnal on page. I kid you not. Whether it was a carnal threat, carnal relations, carnal instinct, carnal way, carnal invitation or carnal encouragement (huh) I just carnally groaned and prayed that may the pleasures of the flesh enlighten Lady Fanny because I was losing my patience.
So time flies by, thanks for telling me again how Lady Fanny is going about, it’s obviously tedious enough and the exposition dumps must be carnally justified. Apologies, I got carried away… Okay, this is a shorter HR being 198 pages on kindle, but in theory, the shortness of it should have worked to its advantage with a plot filled with scenes that show the journey of these characters to the fulfillment of their romance.
Afterall, the plot is quite simple: Lower rank self-made male pines after female of nobility now become a runaway bride and therefore disgraced in the eyes of the ton. Shocking marriage proposal ensues between parties that hardly know each other, wedding of convenience happens and the couple finds love within, with the help of lots of sex.
Instead, quite a chunk of the story is apprised of descriptions of how the married couple finds a routine, how the frowned upon now wedded Lady Fanny is receiving multiple invitations for soirees and balls, how “Lord” Shaw treats his factory employees and that when he wants to fire them he writes them ridiculous for the time severance packages under the proposal of clever and kind Lady Fanny. Everything is fine in historical La La Land except for what happens in their bedroom. Sigh…So after I aired my grievances about “Lord” Shaw’s character, time for Fanny. And Fanny has all the airs of a 21st century heroine and the genteel upbringing of a sheltered 18th century English Lady. She is refreshingly squeamish in her marriage and this is the only thing I liked in the story. I haven’t found many HRs where the female lead is still in a state after her wedding night, and insists on it for several pages after. But I was stacking my bets to see an alpha male to counterbalance her and that’s where the cake flopped.
No being overcome with lust for this heroine, since she didn’t get to indulge feasting on her husband’s physique until many pages later. And it is a universally known truth that as soon as the female gets a glimpse of male muscles she swoons, gets hot all over and starts having vivid mental displays of how he will make her feel in the bedroom. But squeamish Ladies need an alpha male to make romance and “Lord” Shaw is not it. One page she is vehemently declaring to be his wife and she will not be made to wait and on the next she insists on “turning the candles out” during their lovemaking and gets weirded out when “Lord” Shaw gets more physical with his tongue and hands in the dark.
Other than their sexual encounters, she appears to be in a state of blissful ignorance to her non-declining social status, what with the necessary mention of her multiple invitations to soirees and the sort, and that her peers have forgiven her reputation mere days after she is branded the double jilt. Plausible? Yes. Unrealistic? Definitely, but everything has to appear cheery in this historical La La Land and Lady Fanny goes on to merrily plan dinner parties and more balls with the hopes of mixing her husband’s acquaintances of actresses and business people with her more refined social friends. Aka their social surroundings are there for the sheer mention of.
74% into the story “Lord” Shaw has the idea of teaching genteel Lady Fanny self defense in his personal “gym” room so that if she is ever accosted, she will know how to defend herself. In breeches and a shirt. Of course, she objects over the use of such clothes and his recommendation of her undressing in front of him. By this point eyerolling has become a tick my husband had to endure throughout dinner. And I reach the mandatory scene where Fanny realizes that she loves “Lord” Shaw and it has me wanting to howl at the romance of it all.
Fanny smiled at his hopeful look. "You remind me of the cocker spaniel I had as a child. He was always so hopeful I would feed him treats and he softened me up with a similar look!”
“Woof.”
She laughed. “You my lord are outrageous.”
“But you like it.”
“I love everything about you,” she said softly and then stilled at what she implied.
He searched her eyes. “Fanny?”
Her heart pounded, and she stared at him helplessly. I love you. She could not say the words. When did it happen? And how could she be so certain? [..]
Be still my dogged heart, there’s only 25% more to go. By the time he decides he wants to tell her the words, she hushes him with kisses before he finishes his sentence, and she decides she is not ready for the “I love you”.
In a gist, I finish as fast as possible because I HAVE made it so far in a 198 page mere slip of a HR and this will still count in my 2019 reading challenge no matter how many times I wanted to hurl my kindle out the window. So am I normally this bitchy? The uncomplicated answer is no. What was the problem? 4.14 average reviewing on GR that convinced me to pick this up on the first place only to get so incensed after reading it, Jane Austen pluck-out names and all. The truth is, I am a romance stories lover and HRs have a special place in my heart. So I will NOT give up on my quest, and I will still be picking up authors known and unknown to me in hopes of finding a gem that makes me dream. NEXT.