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Diary of a Somebody
Brian Bilston has decided to write a poem every day for a year while he tries to repair his ever-desperate life. His ex-wife has taken up with a new man, a marketing guru and motivational speaker who seems to be disturbingly influencing his son, Dylan. Meanwhile Dylan’s football team keeps being beaten 0–11, as he stands disconsolately on the wing waiting vainly to receive the ball. At work Brian is drowning in a sea of spreadsheets and is becoming increasingly confused by the complexities of modern communication and management jargon. So poetry will be his salvation. But can Brian’s poetry save him from Toby Salt, his arch nemesis in the Poetry Group and potential rival suitor to Brian’s new poetic inspiration, Liz? Worst of all Toby has announced that boutique artisan publishing house Shooting from the Hip will be publishing his first collection, titled This Bridge No Hands Shall Cleft, in the autumn. And when he goes missing Brian is inevitably the number one suspect.
Part tender love story, part murder mystery, part coruscating description of a wasted life, and interspersed with some of the funniest poems about the mundane and the profound, Diary of a Somebody is the most original novel you will read this year.
Part tender love story, part murder mystery, part coruscating description of a wasted life, and interspersed with some of the funniest poems about the mundane and the profound, Diary of a Somebody is the most original novel you will read this year.
384 pages, Paperback
First published June 13, 2019
182 people are currently reading
2707 people want to read
About the author
Brian Bilston
16 books154 followersBrian Bilston is a poet whose work has been shared widely on social media over the last few years. He has been described as the 'unofficial Poet Laureate of Twitter'.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 353 reviews
July 18, 2019
Very clever for such a light read. I can see why Brian Bilston is such a popular poet and he seems like the kind of person with whom you'd share a few pints. And then he'd go home and write about you!
July 23, 2019
Not halfway through the book and I just can't take anymore of this male Bridget Jones who reliably screws everything up and is deeply, inconsistently stupid (doesn´t know who Gaudi is!!??) just to sound funny. No. I simply cannot laugh at a pathetic nincompoop who deserves every bad thing that happens to him, maybe even more. Nor can I sympathize with him but with his poor wife (or ex-wife, don't know yet).
Ok, I get it: it's a funny story, the characters don't have to be realistic, or consistent. But they are so simplistic and predictable as in one of the hateful "Meet the Parents" movies. And even poor Gaylord Focker is more likeable than this Custard-Cream Monster who mopes and mopes... and writes GREAT poems.
The poems are superb. I LOVE Brian Bilston's poetry. That's why I bought the book. I enjoy them, so I will keep the book as a weird poetry collection...
Ok, I get it: it's a funny story, the characters don't have to be realistic, or consistent. But they are so simplistic and predictable as in one of the hateful "Meet the Parents" movies. And even poor Gaylord Focker is more likeable than this Custard-Cream Monster who mopes and mopes... and writes GREAT poems.
The poems are superb. I LOVE Brian Bilston's poetry. That's why I bought the book. I enjoy them, so I will keep the book as a weird poetry collection...
March 13, 2022
When you are in the slightly desperate state of needing a book which is going to make you laugh out loud on every page, the chances of picking one up are obviously vanishingly small. But here it is, I did manage to irritate the daylights out of anybody within hearing distance while I read this, which is extra points right there. It's hilarious, sad, clever and it is full of poetry that makes the reader delight in the obvious enjoyment that went into writing it.
If I weren't sleep deprived to the point of general incompetence, I'd love to write a parody homage by way of a review. But I'm sure somebody else will shortly put one of those up on Goodreads. The closing lines of the book are a heartfelt acknowledgement of Sue Townsend. Yes, her Mole books were fodder for the boy who became the man who wrote this. But it is his own thing, and a wondrously entertaining thing it is.
An easy five stars from me.
If I weren't sleep deprived to the point of general incompetence, I'd love to write a parody homage by way of a review. But I'm sure somebody else will shortly put one of those up on Goodreads. The closing lines of the book are a heartfelt acknowledgement of Sue Townsend. Yes, her Mole books were fodder for the boy who became the man who wrote this. But it is his own thing, and a wondrously entertaining thing it is.
An easy five stars from me.
October 23, 2019
Šī grāmata gandrīz derētu Ziemassvētku lasāmlistē, jo, kā jau kārtīga dienasgrāmata, sākas 1. janvārī, un beidzas 31. decembrī (ar tam piedienošu svētku noskaņu). Braiens ir šķirtenis tā ap 40+, kurš vada dienas neiedvesmojošā darbā, iet uz vīzdegunīgu grāmatu klubiņu (pilnīgi ne tādu kā mūsējais), kuram nekad nav sagatavojies, un daudz jaukāku dzejas klubu. Lai gan jaukajā dzejas klubā ir tikpat jaukā Liza, neizbēgt arī no savas darvas piles, un to sauc Tobijs Salts - dzejnieks, kura vēl neiznākušais krājums jau ir nodēvēts par gada dzejas grāmatu (un no kura pāris dzejas rindām jums jau smadzenes saiet ķīselī). Un kad Tobijs Salts/Enemy No 1 mīklaini pazūd, Braiena problēmām - nespēja uzrakstīt neko jēdzīgu, darba zaudēšana, sarežģītas attiecības ar pusauga dēlu, kurš, šķiet, labāk saprotas ar savas mātes jauno bojfrendu/seriālo iedvesmotāju, pievienojas arī policijas apciemojumi un nedabiskā interese par viņa dienasgrāmatu.
Stāsts pats varbūt ir diezgan vienkāršs (un mietpilsonisks kā mūsu vairākuma dzīves), bet dzejas rindas ir burvīgas, smieklīgas un ar dažādām lieliskām atsaucēm. Un bija jauks un negaidīts sižeta pavērsiens. Un skaisti par to, kā bieži vien vieglāk ir rakstīt, nekā runāt, kā reizēm vārdu ir par daudz, kā var nepietikt ar visu gudro vārdu zināšanu.
“Last year I spent National Poetry Day wrestling with a pivot table. This year, I am waiting for the dishwasher to be fixed. This is the humdrum, unglamorous side of poetry that is often hidden from ordinary members of the public. Many people have the notion that writing poetry is all about striding across meadows, notebook in hand, or quietly observing the world from coffee-shop windows. It is indeed mainly these things but with unfathomable pivot tables and blocked dishwasher pumps thrown in.”
Stāsts pats varbūt ir diezgan vienkāršs (un mietpilsonisks kā mūsu vairākuma dzīves), bet dzejas rindas ir burvīgas, smieklīgas un ar dažādām lieliskām atsaucēm. Un bija jauks un negaidīts sižeta pavērsiens. Un skaisti par to, kā bieži vien vieglāk ir rakstīt, nekā runāt, kā reizēm vārdu ir par daudz, kā var nepietikt ar visu gudro vārdu zināšanu.
“Last year I spent National Poetry Day wrestling with a pivot table. This year, I am waiting for the dishwasher to be fixed. This is the humdrum, unglamorous side of poetry that is often hidden from ordinary members of the public. Many people have the notion that writing poetry is all about striding across meadows, notebook in hand, or quietly observing the world from coffee-shop windows. It is indeed mainly these things but with unfathomable pivot tables and blocked dishwasher pumps thrown in.”
November 10, 2019
I really wanted to like this book. I follow BB on Twitter and enjoy his poems. But the book? It was just too daft. Too silly. And the main character is a twit. Not even a particularly likeable twit either. The story felt contrived. The 2 stars are for the poems which were great although I'd read quite a few of them on Twitter already.
I spent the book with an irritating feeling that I'd read something previously with a similar tone, but never identifed what it was. Given the ref to Sue Townsend at the end, I wondered whether it was Adrian Mole, but it's SO long since I read that I don't remember.
I spent the book with an irritating feeling that I'd read something previously with a similar tone, but never identifed what it was. Given the ref to Sue Townsend at the end, I wondered whether it was Adrian Mole, but it's SO long since I read that I don't remember.
January 25, 2020
I absolutely loved this book and found myself chuckling for days at the penguin in the freezer, the man at number 29 and Toby Salt's poems. If you like Michael MacIntyre's type of humour, this book could be right up your alley.
January 16, 2020
A brilliant book by poet Brian Bilston. I've followed him on facebook for a year or two and thoroughly enjoy his hilarious take on things. This was a very entertaining audiobook and one I'd recommend for some light relief. I really need to get myself some copies of his poetry collections.
June 15, 2019
How on earth am I supposed to review this book? It's part fiction, part poetry, part diary. The sum of the parts though is, in my opinion, a work of genius.
Our eponymous hero, Brian Bilston, starts the year with the intention of writing a poem a day. Whilst that goes by the wayside some days, we are still treated to many poems of the very clever and mostly rhyming variety that I love. The poems form the first part of the entries in Brian's diary over the course of a year of numerous ups and downs for him.
The brilliant thing about this whole structure is the way the banalities of life are turned into rhyming ditties and entries in the diary which are so wonderful to read. Most people's diaries would be quite boring I suspect, but Brian's life is just so fraught with calamity and misunderstanding that the banal becomes interesting, even though it's not dramatic. He just ploughs on hoping for the best.
He's a bit of a likeable fool. I particularly loved how Brian would enter a bookshop for one particular book and just had to buy a few more to keep it company. I'm sure that resonates with every book lover.
He's also a typical man. Subtle doesn't work for him so his tentative friendship with Liz, a woman he (literally) dreams about, is a bit slow to get off the ground. Even when Liz quite obviously asks Brian something where her meaning is quite obvious, for instance, if he would like a nightcap, she gets a monologue with the reasons why he is unable to, or even told that he is watching reruns of A Touch of Frost on the TV that night!
You probably get the picture that Brian makes a few mistakes during the course of the book, but it's impossible to do anything but like him.
The writing is so funny, witty and dry. I spent much of the book smiling, sniggering and giggling. I kept thinking that when I write my review I must mention this poem or that one but then I'd read the next one and think the same thing. They're all worthy of a mention, although I thought the excel spreadsheet one was particularly clever and I did enjoy singing My Favourite Words to the tune of My Favourite Things from The Sound of Music!
It's very difficult to fully explain the nature of this book. In fact, when I picked it up I wasn't entirely sure what to expect even then, only that I loved the idea of the unique concept of it. I was familiar with Brian Bilston's poetry from Twitter so I knew that that aspect was going to be good anyway, but the whole thing is just fabulous. It has a sardonic edge that really appeals to my sense of humour and it's just a pleasure from start to finish.
I'll leave you with my plea to you in poem form!
Grab yourself a custard cream
and settle down to read.
A book with more laughs
than legs on a centipede.
Diary of a Somebody is
a uniquely clever book.
Disappointment will surely prevail
if you don't take a look.
The End.
Our eponymous hero, Brian Bilston, starts the year with the intention of writing a poem a day. Whilst that goes by the wayside some days, we are still treated to many poems of the very clever and mostly rhyming variety that I love. The poems form the first part of the entries in Brian's diary over the course of a year of numerous ups and downs for him.
The brilliant thing about this whole structure is the way the banalities of life are turned into rhyming ditties and entries in the diary which are so wonderful to read. Most people's diaries would be quite boring I suspect, but Brian's life is just so fraught with calamity and misunderstanding that the banal becomes interesting, even though it's not dramatic. He just ploughs on hoping for the best.
He's a bit of a likeable fool. I particularly loved how Brian would enter a bookshop for one particular book and just had to buy a few more to keep it company. I'm sure that resonates with every book lover.
He's also a typical man. Subtle doesn't work for him so his tentative friendship with Liz, a woman he (literally) dreams about, is a bit slow to get off the ground. Even when Liz quite obviously asks Brian something where her meaning is quite obvious, for instance, if he would like a nightcap, she gets a monologue with the reasons why he is unable to, or even told that he is watching reruns of A Touch of Frost on the TV that night!
You probably get the picture that Brian makes a few mistakes during the course of the book, but it's impossible to do anything but like him.
The writing is so funny, witty and dry. I spent much of the book smiling, sniggering and giggling. I kept thinking that when I write my review I must mention this poem or that one but then I'd read the next one and think the same thing. They're all worthy of a mention, although I thought the excel spreadsheet one was particularly clever and I did enjoy singing My Favourite Words to the tune of My Favourite Things from The Sound of Music!
It's very difficult to fully explain the nature of this book. In fact, when I picked it up I wasn't entirely sure what to expect even then, only that I loved the idea of the unique concept of it. I was familiar with Brian Bilston's poetry from Twitter so I knew that that aspect was going to be good anyway, but the whole thing is just fabulous. It has a sardonic edge that really appeals to my sense of humour and it's just a pleasure from start to finish.
I'll leave you with my plea to you in poem form!
Grab yourself a custard cream
and settle down to read.
A book with more laughs
than legs on a centipede.
Diary of a Somebody is
a uniquely clever book.
Disappointment will surely prevail
if you don't take a look.
The End.
January 20, 2022
I wanted this book to be really good
since I follow Brian on the Twitter 'hood
A few chapters later
I willed it to be better
But I parked it cos I needed some food
I gave the book another shot
A poet he is, but novelist he's not
More chapters I've read
Before I went to bed
Oh Mr Bilston, is this all you've got?
The themes of middle-age woes were familiar
But the way it was written was rather peculiar
A huge part of it moaned
And I inwardly groaned
But entertaining, so not entirely a failure
A male Bridget Jones, some people have said
And reminded me of some diarists I've read
And though I'm not a hater
(I still follow him on Twitter)
I'm leaving my copy in a free library instead
since I follow Brian on the Twitter 'hood
A few chapters later
I willed it to be better
But I parked it cos I needed some food
I gave the book another shot
A poet he is, but novelist he's not
More chapters I've read
Before I went to bed
Oh Mr Bilston, is this all you've got?
The themes of middle-age woes were familiar
But the way it was written was rather peculiar
A huge part of it moaned
And I inwardly groaned
But entertaining, so not entirely a failure
A male Bridget Jones, some people have said
And reminded me of some diarists I've read
And though I'm not a hater
(I still follow him on Twitter)
I'm leaving my copy in a free library instead
April 25, 2019
If you love wordplay, you'll love this.
October 4, 2020
The poetry is hilarious, the story is rather weak though.
January 29, 2020
I read this at an opportune time. It really cheered me up.
I have long envied artists who draw and sketch each day; who are able to transform ordinary visual experience into art – I imagine it to be a joy.
So here comes Brian Bilston, using his gift of turning the mundane, the everyday into a diary entry and/or a poem, using the power of wit and the ability to mine the language for puns and other delights. He decides to make a diary entry for each day of the year, in order to master and get over life’s blows. His exasperated wife Sophie has just left him.
Life just gets worse. He sinks deeper and deeper into a state of lethargy, with only the cat for company, and his funny and sometimes subversive poems to lighten his mood. His focus narrows down to his neighbours’ bin day and other habits. He finds it difficult in his depressed state to engage with his teenage son Dylan who visits once a week. Sophie acquires a dynamic partner, the paragon of all virtues, a man whose success does not stop him from doing good deeds and who inspires Brian’s son with motivational quotes. As if life couldn’t get worse, this paragon decides he will relocate to the US taking Sophie and Dylan with him - this, just when Brian was starting to bond really well with his son. His son is reluctant to go.
Brian’s job has become increasingly tedious and opaque. (there are lovely pieces of modern jargon and office-speak). He is eventually made redundant. He never manages to read more than a few pages of the set book for his Book Group. He knows he will soon be thrown out. His contributions to the Poetry Group fall on unappreciative ground, while Toby Salt his rival is much admired and goes on to be published and fêted elsewhere.
This poem offends their sense of decorum and “poesie”:
Love in the Time of Cauliflower
Please marrow me, my beloved sweetpea,
so that we may beetroot to our hearts.
Lettuce have the courgette of our convictions
and our love elevated to Great Artichoke.
Don’t leek me feeling this way, my dear,
such lofty asparagus can’t be ignored.
I am a prisoner, trapped in your celery;
Don’t make me go back to the drawing broad beans.
We all carry emotional cabbage:
love is chard and not inconsequential,
but may our passion be uncucumbered
so that we reach our true potato.
Oh, how your onions make my head spinach,
reduce me to mushrooms, broccoli, defenceless.
Only you can salsify my desire,
and I, in turnip, will radish you senseless.
Brian is sinking into despair and becoming reckless. His funny poems sound like the cry of a clown - outward smiles masking a deperate state of mind. This is when the story turns into a murder mystery. Suffice to say that there are certain gaps in the diary, literally torn out pages, and that the mystery is resolved with the means of a poem. Neat.
This poem is about Oxymorons.
Alone together, for once,
I told her how I thought that –
in my unbiased opinion –
the incidence of oxymorons
in the English language
had been growing smaller.
That’s old news, she said,
adding that it had been the case
for almost exactly ten years.
Things got pretty ugly.
But this, in itself,
felt strangely normal;
for ours was
a bittersweet relationship,
a civil war
of violent agreements.
I found myself annoyingly
endeared to her
whilst she thought
my puritanical streak
seriously funny.
Our contradictions
complemented each other
perfectly.
Same difference,
I whispered loudly,
but she, with a sad smile,
after telling me how
I’d left her speechless,
went back to reading
her textbook
on business ethics.
Finally, for those who like the playful, and the nonsensical that makes sense:
Not a Poem
This is not a poem
only a combination of words
broken up in such a way to make
you think it is.
Spacing is important
upper case characters
line breaks
that I have skilfully
manoevred on the page (note too the absence of
upper case characters
see how they make it seem
deeper somehow
it is still not a poem, though,
enough of this now.
The entry in the diary goes on:
What the hell is poetry anyhow? The tearing open of the heart? the baring of the soul? The sharing of a universe? Or is it all mere postrue and pantomine?
Ask someone who cares.
I have long envied artists who draw and sketch each day; who are able to transform ordinary visual experience into art – I imagine it to be a joy.
So here comes Brian Bilston, using his gift of turning the mundane, the everyday into a diary entry and/or a poem, using the power of wit and the ability to mine the language for puns and other delights. He decides to make a diary entry for each day of the year, in order to master and get over life’s blows. His exasperated wife Sophie has just left him.
Life just gets worse. He sinks deeper and deeper into a state of lethargy, with only the cat for company, and his funny and sometimes subversive poems to lighten his mood. His focus narrows down to his neighbours’ bin day and other habits. He finds it difficult in his depressed state to engage with his teenage son Dylan who visits once a week. Sophie acquires a dynamic partner, the paragon of all virtues, a man whose success does not stop him from doing good deeds and who inspires Brian’s son with motivational quotes. As if life couldn’t get worse, this paragon decides he will relocate to the US taking Sophie and Dylan with him - this, just when Brian was starting to bond really well with his son. His son is reluctant to go.
Brian’s job has become increasingly tedious and opaque. (there are lovely pieces of modern jargon and office-speak). He is eventually made redundant. He never manages to read more than a few pages of the set book for his Book Group. He knows he will soon be thrown out. His contributions to the Poetry Group fall on unappreciative ground, while Toby Salt his rival is much admired and goes on to be published and fêted elsewhere.
This poem offends their sense of decorum and “poesie”:
Love in the Time of Cauliflower
Please marrow me, my beloved sweetpea,
so that we may beetroot to our hearts.
Lettuce have the courgette of our convictions
and our love elevated to Great Artichoke.
Don’t leek me feeling this way, my dear,
such lofty asparagus can’t be ignored.
I am a prisoner, trapped in your celery;
Don’t make me go back to the drawing broad beans.
We all carry emotional cabbage:
love is chard and not inconsequential,
but may our passion be uncucumbered
so that we reach our true potato.
Oh, how your onions make my head spinach,
reduce me to mushrooms, broccoli, defenceless.
Only you can salsify my desire,
and I, in turnip, will radish you senseless.
Brian is sinking into despair and becoming reckless. His funny poems sound like the cry of a clown - outward smiles masking a deperate state of mind. This is when the story turns into a murder mystery. Suffice to say that there are certain gaps in the diary, literally torn out pages, and that the mystery is resolved with the means of a poem. Neat.
This poem is about Oxymorons.
Alone together, for once,
I told her how I thought that –
in my unbiased opinion –
the incidence of oxymorons
in the English language
had been growing smaller.
That’s old news, she said,
adding that it had been the case
for almost exactly ten years.
Things got pretty ugly.
But this, in itself,
felt strangely normal;
for ours was
a bittersweet relationship,
a civil war
of violent agreements.
I found myself annoyingly
endeared to her
whilst she thought
my puritanical streak
seriously funny.
Our contradictions
complemented each other
perfectly.
Same difference,
I whispered loudly,
but she, with a sad smile,
after telling me how
I’d left her speechless,
went back to reading
her textbook
on business ethics.
Finally, for those who like the playful, and the nonsensical that makes sense:
Not a Poem
This is not a poem
only a combination of words
broken up in such a way to make
you think it is.
Spacing is important
upper case characters
line breaks
that I have skilfully
manoevred on the page (note too the absence of
upper case characters
see how they make it seem
deeper somehow
it is still not a poem, though,
enough of this now.
The entry in the diary goes on:
What the hell is poetry anyhow? The tearing open of the heart? the baring of the soul? The sharing of a universe? Or is it all mere postrue and pantomine?
Ask someone who cares.
August 22, 2019
Another winner from Brian Bilston
I am a big fan of Brian Bilston and really enjoyed his poetry collection You Took the Last Bus Home (2017).
Diary of a Somebody (2019) is Brian's first novel and is a lot of fun: great poems, an engaging story, the absurdity of the modern workplace, poetic rivalry, dazzling wordplay, a love story, lots of laughs, and plenty of imagination.
An uplifting read
4/5
I am a big fan of Brian Bilston and really enjoyed his poetry collection You Took the Last Bus Home (2017).
Diary of a Somebody (2019) is Brian's first novel and is a lot of fun: great poems, an engaging story, the absurdity of the modern workplace, poetic rivalry, dazzling wordplay, a love story, lots of laughs, and plenty of imagination.
An uplifting read
4/5
March 5, 2020
I saw Brian Bilston giving a reading in Grasmere and he was very entertaining and likeable so I would have liked to have enjoyed this book but after about 30 pages this stopped and by 60 pages I was just irritated.
I am sure that this is because when other people are laughing because someones fallen flat on their face I am going "ouch that must have hurt". In this case the person hurt is not the hero clown (who is seems blissfully unaware of how dysfunctional he is). Rather its his son who is hurt when he forgets his 16th birthday, his employers when he hides his complete incompetence, a mob of suppliers who go unpaid when he wastes all his redundancy money. He never finishes a book for his book club. He robs the fellow members of his poetry club. He completely confuses the poor woman who finds him attractive.
Most of the poems are enjoyable in their cleverness (but not emotions).
The plots twist and whodunit at the end save it a little . . . but not enough for me.
I am sure that this is because when other people are laughing because someones fallen flat on their face I am going "ouch that must have hurt". In this case the person hurt is not the hero clown (who is seems blissfully unaware of how dysfunctional he is). Rather its his son who is hurt when he forgets his 16th birthday, his employers when he hides his complete incompetence, a mob of suppliers who go unpaid when he wastes all his redundancy money. He never finishes a book for his book club. He robs the fellow members of his poetry club. He completely confuses the poor woman who finds him attractive.
Most of the poems are enjoyable in their cleverness (but not emotions).
The plots twist and whodunit at the end save it a little . . . but not enough for me.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 10, 2019
Enjoyed this book funny and connected with it
June 1, 2020
OMG read this book
Honestly it's just a great read
Do you ever feel a book is just made for you to read it
Brian sometimes reminded me very much of Mark from peep show who I adore and they mentioned one of my fave films Donnie darko
Laugh out loud funny but also poignant
Very witty and I just loved it
Couldn't put it down but didn't want it to finish
5 stars
Honestly it's just a great read
Do you ever feel a book is just made for you to read it
Brian sometimes reminded me very much of Mark from peep show who I adore and they mentioned one of my fave films Donnie darko
Laugh out loud funny but also poignant
Very witty and I just loved it
Couldn't put it down but didn't want it to finish
5 stars
August 16, 2019
nice plot, recently fired want-to-be poet struggles with
relationship to son, (post ex-wife marrying motivational speaker / serial charity challenge participant),
poetry club mediocrity, emphasised when one of members becomes a published phenomenon, then disappears and our protagonist becomes murder suspect
potential relationship with new club member, where his naivety and shyness sabotage his progress
add in multiple humourous mini plots - book club where he never finishes the monthly book, year long efforts at completing Christmas cryptic crossword, neighbouring psychic who sees death in future, neighbour's struggles with getting the bins out for collection, his son's turnaround of youth football team with step dads motivational lines, corporate speak non-sense
interspersed with his whimsical poetry
relationship to son, (post ex-wife marrying motivational speaker / serial charity challenge participant),
poetry club mediocrity, emphasised when one of members becomes a published phenomenon, then disappears and our protagonist becomes murder suspect
potential relationship with new club member, where his naivety and shyness sabotage his progress
add in multiple humourous mini plots - book club where he never finishes the monthly book, year long efforts at completing Christmas cryptic crossword, neighbouring psychic who sees death in future, neighbour's struggles with getting the bins out for collection, his son's turnaround of youth football team with step dads motivational lines, corporate speak non-sense
interspersed with his whimsical poetry
March 19, 2022
I really wanted to like this book. I really thought I would like this book. I really didn't like this book (very much). Despite not having any social media accounts and not being into twitter or tweeter or twatter, the synopsis really appealed to me. It sounded like a modernised male version of Bridget Jones Diary, which I really enjoyed reading (about 1/4 of a century ago). The main character Brian, actually was a bit of a male version Bridget Jones, except Bridget was likeable. I know it was meant to be funny, but I just found Brian so?, so?.... maybe that's it just very so-so. He was a little slash lot self-absorbed (to the point of forgetting his young son's birthday - who would do that), never had a drivers license, rightfully got made redundant from a job where he did nothing and the only thing he seemed to strive for was to appear smarter than he actually was. Lawd how I sympathised with his ex-wife! The idea of him writing a poem every day for a year, sounded like a fun read, and to be fair, I actually did enjoy most of the poems. They were witty and clever. I just wish the actual book had been.
July 16, 2021
This was a bit of light reading between some more serious books, and it met that objective. The author is known to many Twitter followers for his witty poems and plays on words. I didn't know him before reading this, but was attracted by a positive review. The plot is familiar - washed-up middle-aged guy is out of step with family, work and the wider world, but finds companionship and finally redemption through poetry and books. There's a good if unlikely nemesis, and a bit of a love interest to keep things moving along. I missed many of the references to certain types of rock bands but no matter. The witticisms came thick and fast, sometimes so many punchlines in a row that at times I felt rather, um, punched. But better that than being bored. Fun book.
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August 29, 2022I picked this up after reading his poem of You Caught the Last Bus Home, which was amazing, but the library didn’t have that book. They only had this one.
Some of the poems are great, but the mishmash of story in there (while objectively the narrator does nothing) got tiring very quickly. Maybe in a different mood I’d enjoy this more, but it was mostly tedious.
Some of the poems are great, but the mishmash of story in there (while objectively the narrator does nothing) got tiring very quickly. Maybe in a different mood I’d enjoy this more, but it was mostly tedious.
May 14, 2023
This was an interesting, semi-autobiographical novel by one of my favourite poets, Brian Bilston, based on the author's purported diary for a year. A really light-hearted read, comprising many humorous and clever poems and amusing day-to-day events as Brian tries to cope with his boring job, his mad next-door neighbour, the members of his poetry club and book club and his broken marriage. A highly enjoyable read - 9/10.
February 18, 2021
I think this book became one of my favourites before I’d even finished reading it. It is gentle and tender in all the right places, filling my need for a book to wrap me up in a hug whilst I read it. The poetry is gorgeous and I would really recommend this to anyone who needs something gentle.
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December 28, 2020Love the poems but to keep up and read the book being in the main character's head was just too much!
June 3, 2020
What a silly book. I laughed all the way through it. The narrator Brian is a total nerd, he doesn't have a clue about anything, but he is a genius at playing with words. I'm not very keen on poetry but this, I promise you, is not like any poetry you have ever read.
October 17, 2025
I do like a bit of Bilston to brighten up my day. Even when he's being silly, he does it with cleverness. Poetry with plot? It's got the lot.
May 12, 2025
I enjoy Brian Bilston’s poems and his humour! 😊
February 13, 2020
I can see this becoming my Book of he Year. Super enjoyable, funny and very, very clever. It never waned - refreshing and well written. The poetry was like an extra present for the reader.
March 25, 2020
If you want a bit of light hearted relief from the world around you, then Brian Bilston is your man. Otherwise known as the poet laureate of Twitter, he has an uncanny knack of seeing the absurdity in everyday life and then turning it into rhyme.
In Diary of a Somebody, our hero Brian Bilston (how autobiographical this fictional alter ego is we may never know!) makes a resolution to write a poem a day in his diary. Needless to say, like almost all new year's resolutions, he fails fairly quickly. Even so, many of the chapters start with poems, some of which (the real) Brian Bilston has previously shared on Twitter. Through the year, (the fictional) Brian documents his frustrating and pointless job, the rise of his poetry club nemesis Toby Salt, his relationship with his son Dylan (along with his terrible football team) and his would-be relationship with poetry club newbie Liz. When Toby Salt goes missing, suspicion falls on Brian and so the story becomes a mystery.
It's warm, funny and a total delight.
In Diary of a Somebody, our hero Brian Bilston (how autobiographical this fictional alter ego is we may never know!) makes a resolution to write a poem a day in his diary. Needless to say, like almost all new year's resolutions, he fails fairly quickly. Even so, many of the chapters start with poems, some of which (the real) Brian Bilston has previously shared on Twitter. Through the year, (the fictional) Brian documents his frustrating and pointless job, the rise of his poetry club nemesis Toby Salt, his relationship with his son Dylan (along with his terrible football team) and his would-be relationship with poetry club newbie Liz. When Toby Salt goes missing, suspicion falls on Brian and so the story becomes a mystery.
It's warm, funny and a total delight.
November 3, 2020
I wanted to love this book. I love Brian Bilston's poetry and have often pictured us (well, me and a shapeless figure I assume to be him) riding off into the sunset together. But I didn't love this book. In fact, for eight months of the diary I rather disliked it. The character of Brian Bilston (it was unnecessary for him to use his own nom de plume) was so insufferable, not just in the little amusing ways I found relatable, but in huge sympathy-sapping ways that meant you never rooted for his redemption. The book picked up in excitement in the ninth month, but it was too late, and even though the book became more exciting, the main character never improved quite enough for you to feel too happy about any good coming his way.
I still ADORED the poems, and any mention of the cat, and of course the celebration of custard creams. But I think the genre of 'hapless man is bitter about divorce' has met its timely end.
I still ADORED the poems, and any mention of the cat, and of course the celebration of custard creams. But I think the genre of 'hapless man is bitter about divorce' has met its timely end.
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