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Beautiful Girlhood: A Christian Girl's Guide to Growing Up
The book deals primarily with the Christian character development, moral virtues and manners of pre-teen and teenage girls. It is one of the best-selling titles in the homeschooling community.
80 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1922
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 132 reviews
April 14, 2020
Oh my. I read a soon-to-be-re-released version of this 100 year-old book and I cringe to think that people are still trying to teach girls to live this way. This book may have been helpful for some girls in the early 1900's (no, not really) but what 21st century young woman is going to relate to a woman preaching to her about the sins of wanting to ride in fancy carriages or wearing an extravagant hairstyle?
The book gives all the standard old fashioned advice about how important it is to be obedient, helpful, kind, meek, etc. Girls should not be friends with boys. If you dress provocatively (like showing arms) you not only are asking for any awful things that are said about you, but you are harming the "good" boys who might have sinful thoughts put in their heads by overhearing nasty things boys might say about you. Don't act like a boy. Nobody wants a boyish girl or a girlish boy. Don't hold hands or play games with boys, etc.
"She should always remember that Father has the right to direct her life, to say what she shall and shall not do...". And so on. It's all straight out of a Duggar family handbook -- shame, guilt and victim-blaming and all.
The book goes on and on with talk about how a girl should act and what she should do, but it also gives almost no actual instruction. The author says that a girl should know how to cook, clean, dust, keep herself healthy, make money if something happens and she needs to, etc. but doesn't tell how to do these things. There are just lots of stories about young girls the author knew and how they (mostly) failed or shined. At best, it makes for interesting history but in a really depressing way.
At one point the author even says that nowadays girls are allowed to "go out in public" as if that's a bad thing. Oh, and reading mystery or crime books is sinful too, almost as much as befriending the kinds of people in those books.
I am saddened that people today are still trying to say this stuff is good advice for anyone. While I love reading historic books, this isn't one that I would recommend.
I read a temporary digital ARC of this book for the purpose of review.
The book gives all the standard old fashioned advice about how important it is to be obedient, helpful, kind, meek, etc. Girls should not be friends with boys. If you dress provocatively (like showing arms) you not only are asking for any awful things that are said about you, but you are harming the "good" boys who might have sinful thoughts put in their heads by overhearing nasty things boys might say about you. Don't act like a boy. Nobody wants a boyish girl or a girlish boy. Don't hold hands or play games with boys, etc.
"She should always remember that Father has the right to direct her life, to say what she shall and shall not do...". And so on. It's all straight out of a Duggar family handbook -- shame, guilt and victim-blaming and all.
The book goes on and on with talk about how a girl should act and what she should do, but it also gives almost no actual instruction. The author says that a girl should know how to cook, clean, dust, keep herself healthy, make money if something happens and she needs to, etc. but doesn't tell how to do these things. There are just lots of stories about young girls the author knew and how they (mostly) failed or shined. At best, it makes for interesting history but in a really depressing way.
At one point the author even says that nowadays girls are allowed to "go out in public" as if that's a bad thing. Oh, and reading mystery or crime books is sinful too, almost as much as befriending the kinds of people in those books.
I am saddened that people today are still trying to say this stuff is good advice for anyone. While I love reading historic books, this isn't one that I would recommend.
I read a temporary digital ARC of this book for the purpose of review.
September 1, 2010
I'm sure this book would have been very helpful to girls in the early 20th century, but not now. I'm a 14 year old girl and I would feel really silly acting the way this book suggests. It's not really Biblical like it claims it's just old fashioned. I mean who honestly would expect girls these days to dress and act like girls from 100 years ago? This book may be helpful to some people, but definitely not me.
September 30, 2007
Susan bought this for me for my 20th birthday.
As I read it, I am not only carried away by the beautiful prose and lyrical instruction, but I am also thankful for the wisdom that age carries and passes down to its young.
"I would not chill the warmth and ardor of happy girlhood. What if I do know that the clouds and storms of life are just ahead and that its cares will bend her back and break her heart! Would they be any less if she knew? Soon enough the sorrows and pain will come. Laugh and play now, for this is your day. Dream your bright and happy dreams, and aspire to your lofty heights. I should be a pessimist indeed if I saw evil in the radiant dreams and fair hopes that now brighten your skies and make your path light." (13-14)
Certain parts, i disagreed with, yet I had to check myself to see if what I disagreed with was due to the cultural disparities or because it checked at my conscience. There were quite a few times of conscience pricks, yet there were also times where I felt the claims she made were too large and unsupported (ie// (second to being a wife and mother) "there is no nobler profession for any girl to choose than that of a teacher").
Overall, I am charmed by the optimism and love in this book, there were many times i wrinkled my nose at it, but I definitely have to check myself and see if what I protest at is due to the counter cultural claims or because it is wrong.
As I read it, I am not only carried away by the beautiful prose and lyrical instruction, but I am also thankful for the wisdom that age carries and passes down to its young.
"I would not chill the warmth and ardor of happy girlhood. What if I do know that the clouds and storms of life are just ahead and that its cares will bend her back and break her heart! Would they be any less if she knew? Soon enough the sorrows and pain will come. Laugh and play now, for this is your day. Dream your bright and happy dreams, and aspire to your lofty heights. I should be a pessimist indeed if I saw evil in the radiant dreams and fair hopes that now brighten your skies and make your path light." (13-14)
Certain parts, i disagreed with, yet I had to check myself to see if what I disagreed with was due to the cultural disparities or because it checked at my conscience. There were quite a few times of conscience pricks, yet there were also times where I felt the claims she made were too large and unsupported (ie// (second to being a wife and mother) "there is no nobler profession for any girl to choose than that of a teacher").
Overall, I am charmed by the optimism and love in this book, there were many times i wrinkled my nose at it, but I definitely have to check myself and see if what I protest at is due to the counter cultural claims or because it is wrong.
December 28, 2022
One of the best books I have ever read. Every single teenage girl should read it, preferably at least once a year. While it is mostly directed at girls in their early teens, there is much in it for older teens as well. Although written in 1922, it is not outdated - the author wrote it in such a way that changing times would not change the majority of what it says. Its principles are still applicable today - perhaps now more than ever. Even if something is occasionally mentioned that does not still have relevance today, it is always easy to find a modern equivalent where the basic principle still holds good. I strongly recommend this to every girl now in the years of beautiful girlhood.
June 28, 2023
Beautiful Girlhood, revised and adapted by Karen Andreola in 1993, was popular in my days of growing up in the mid 1990s through mid 2000s. I underlined it, referenced it, and read it some more. I held it as my ideal of what a girl should be. It was the culture of my family, my belief system, and I thought it was pretty much perfect.
I cannot state more clearly that this book is a perfect book to give your daughter IF you want her to be set up for abusive, shaming relationships - as a daughter, girlfriend, or wife. Since I’m pretty sure none of us desire our daughters to be in such situations, I would not ever recommend this book.
As I reread the book, I wrote down quote after quote of why this book is so problematic, along with my reasons as to why it is such. The legalistic, shaming, controlling information in this book caused much harm in my life, my friends’ lives, and our entire generation. It’s appalling to me that there are people still giving this book to their daughters today. I am all for giving high quality books of faith and Christianity to our children…but this is not a book that speaks love, freedom, and grace into anyone’s lives.
While this book is presented as fact and gospel truth, it’s actually mostly opinion & conjecture. While I usually reserve 1 star ratings for books I could not finish & only skimmed to the end, I did finish this one, and I cannot justify giving it a higher rating (though I probably could justify giving it a lower one if such a thing existed).
If you continue reading this review you will be reading direct quotes from the book. Below each quote are my thoughts as to why each of these quotes are problematic. The quotes I have italicized to make it more clear which parts are direct quotes from the book and which parts are my written thoughts. Please note, these quotes are not the only problematic parts of the book. I would say a good 85-90% of the book is filled with very similar instruction and guidance. But since I cannot type out the entire book to issue a rebuttal, here are the parts that made most sense for me to deal with:
“When I was about fourteen, Mother was making me a new dress, and I wanted the sleeves made very full at the hand and open from the elbow down. They were very ugly and very unhandy, and always falling into everything, and it was winter and very cold: but I wanted the sleeves made that way no matter what was said to me. Mother set her lips together and said, ‘Well, you shall have them.’ Her look called me to my senses, and I began to back down, but she said, ‘No, you shall have them just as you want them,’ and I had to drag and dribble those sleeves around till the dress was worn out. I found out that it was just a notion, which lasted but a short while, that I wanted such sleeves, and that my real self despised them. Mother knew that all the time. I am not blaming you for being changeable, but I want you to see that you are changing, and not to expect everyone to change with you.” (P. 23)
^What? So the girl starts to change her mind and think through it, but no, the mother doesn’t have a conversation with her and instead manipulatively decides to make the daughter think it’s her own fault for wearing the hideous sleeves all winter because she had a thought that wasn’t then guided into discussion in a mature manner? That’s not healthy. It should be gently discussed together, and if a child changes their opinion (which this girl was beginning to do!) not forced to reap the consequences of a fleeting thought when a sensible solution was about to be proposed & brought to light.
“You think of your mother as being unkind and possibly unjust. She thinks of you as being stubborn and ungrateful.” (P. 25)
^Why are we pitting family members against each other? This can be resolved with healthy communication. I DO know that some of these thoughts do happen in families…but encouraging it and stating it as fact and normal does not help it get better.
“Keep acquainted with your father also. […] He is busy and may not take the initiative in a hearty relationship; but he will appreciate the kind approaches of his young daughter if she comes to him smiling and seeking to know him better.” (P. 25)
^Um…what?! So the burden of relationship is on the daughter?! And she has to act like all is well and make her father happy by being the adult in this relationship? Speaking from experience of LIVING this exact scenario, I can say that it is not healthy in any way, shape, or form. No matter how busy a father is, he should always have time for his children. Now yes, there might be certain days where a daughter might need to take a little initiative…but if as a whole we are saying a father is too busy for his daughter, and the daughter needs to be the one continually reaching out then this is a big problem. And not one that the daughter needs to fix; it is solely on the father’s shoulders.
“But the one [girl] who is endeavoring to build good character takes heed to the commands given her, whether good or bad, and receives the admonitions and reproofs that come her way and governs herself by them, because it is right to do so.” (P. 38)
^ Training children to obey bad commands leads to them one day not knowing when to put up boundaries and say no in the face of evil, wrong, and abuse. It literally teaches them that they cannot have a say in unsafe and/or abusive, controlling situations.
“A happy heart, a smiling face, loving words and deeds, and a desire to be of service, will make any girl beautiful.” (P. 42)
^While this statement on its own isn’t completely wrong, when the book is filled with such statements, it definitely leaves the impression that if you want good character and to be a beautiful woman, you must smile & serve, with no complaints or thought put into what you specifically might like or not like. Many other statements throughout the book also suggest that a woman must always look put together and neat to show she cares, but not put too much effort into her appearance because that is vanity.
“…let us choose together the ideal woman. […] A truly ideal woman must not be one who is silly or frivolous, nor shall she be guilty of actions that appear vulgar or undermining. She must be sweet-voiced and gentle. How a loud, boisterous woman jars on one’s feelings! […] Her clothing must be modest and becoming — how could an ideal woman wear anything that would cause those looking on to be overly adorned with ornaments, but rather she must be known for the beauty of her character. […] She must be a good housewife and a good mother.” (P. 75)
^Not sure I can even unpack all of this. Who defines what is silly, frivolous, and boisterous? The person trying to control the girl? There is nothing wrong with having fun, but in Christian communities this is often defined in those condemning terms. So a woman must not be outspoken? Why? Because it’s a threat to those in the authority chain above her? She must be pretty and well meaning, but cannot enjoy fun niceties in her appearance? And heaven help that a girl could stoop to less than marriage and motherhood…..?
“It is not enough to have good ideals alone. There must be a careful and persistent effort to live up to them. To reach these ideals often costs the sacrifice of other things that seem pleasant. Like the merchant of old who found a pearl of greatest price and sold all that he has to purchase it, so a girl to keep her ideals pure must be willing to give up all else for them. And a girl will sacrifice much for her ideal, be it good or bad.” (P. 76)
^ This concept that we have to give up what matters most to reach an ideal is so damaging. Sometimes we do have to make hard choices to get to a better place. But oftentimes those in abusive or controlling authority roles convince a girl she needs to let go of something in the name of Christian suffering to be who God wants her to be…and it is simply a control mechanism to conform a girl to an ideal held by those in authority.
“More down-to-earth are a girl’s dreams of a husband, a home, and children. One can imagine how she will be a true wife, a good mother, and helpful neighbor. […] Such dreams […] are true character builders. […] Yet again, a girl may allow her dreams to dwell upon things that are not pure, and she may taste of forbidden pleasures through her imaginations. This imagination is fueled through the reading of romance novels and in some motion pictures. It is possible for her to become vile in her heart and mind by unclean thoughts, and yet live apparently a pure life. By such dreaming, a girl drops all her guards and when the temptation comes strong, may fall into acts of sin.” (P. 93)
^Where to start? So have we decided that the most holy of all dreams for a girl to have is to be a wife and mother? It is NOT a bad dream, but it is also NOT more holy. Furthermore, we’ve managed to demonize romance novels (there are absolutely some inappropriate ones out there, but this just lumped them all together), along with motion pictures AND imagination. Imagination is a beautiful thing, and some stories with romance in them are powerful stories that fuel much learning and growth….and even if they aren’t wholly appropriate, why exactly are we scared of them? Wouldn’t it be better to trust that we can discuss them together and learn from the mistakes or values displayed within the stories?
“The only dreams that are worthwhile are those than can be, and are, worked out in practical everyday life. […] Dream, but let dreams be of usefulness and service, of purity and truth.” (P. 95)
^ There are many dreams that should be encouraged even if they cannot come true at this moment. There are so many dreams that are fully ok, but they simply aren’t for this exact moment. Some dreams also might not be practical at any phase of life, but that doesn’t mean that they are bad. To claim they aren’t worthwhile, or even dangerous, is blatantly false.
“The safest girl is the one who makes her mother her most confidential friend. Mother knows and loves her best. It is Mother to whom she may share her most personal dreams, insecurities, or concerns.” (P. 99)
^For some girls this may be true. I have an amazing mother, but in this girlhood stage of life, there were things that weren’t safe to share even with her. This puts a burden on a girl to think that she must tell everything to her mother and expect it to be a good thing….and that simply isn’t safe for everyone. (And honestly, based on other things in this book, the mothers who would strongly encourage a book like this are honestly LESS likely to be safe.)
“When girls have friends among boys, even more care should be used in their selection and treatment than with girls. There is only a small margin between the love of friendship and romance, and what the girl may have begun only as a friendship may develop into something more serious. Also, if a girl will make herself too familiar with her friendships with the opposite sex, she is liable to give them a wrong conception of her. She may appear to them to be only a ‘good fellow’ and they may interpret that to mean that she has let down some of her womanly guards and does not expect to be treated with the deference and respect usually given to good women. Any girl is in a dangerous position when she gets this reputation.” (P. 100)
^ The demonization of friendships between the sexes really needs to stop. Also, note that in this scenario, the onus of guilt is on the girl for developing a relationship with the guys. Her only “guilt” is friendliness, but now if they treat her inappropriately, she brought it on herself. Nowhere is it mentioned that the guys did not treat her with respect and that is solely on their shoulders.
This quote from the book is stated by a man who has turned a cold shoulder to a girl he had been interested. “I overheard the conversations of some of the men, and learned that you were known among them as one who joined in their jokes and frivolity and some of them even made slighting remarks to me about my friendship with you. Forgive me, but you have forced me to speak plainly. I want my wife to have a record of womanliness and purity. […] Your conduct does not always give the appearance of innocence. The girl men will joke with is not the girl they will marry.” (P. 101)
^ In this character study, the only crime the girl had committed was being friendly and joking with guys at work. She was not even dating, let alone sleeping around. It is implied she was supposed to be a demure lady at her desk ignoring all around her - but no, she had fun and made some jokes. And as such, she is made out to be a woman without character or virtue.
“One who has kindness of heart is able to look upon the failings of others with consideration and patience, for she remembers that she herself is not without fault.” (P. 108)
^There is an element of truth to this statement. But often this argument is made within narcissistic, abusive, and controlling situations to gaslight the victim into not realizing the full severity and inappropriateness of the abuse. All people have faults. 100%. And there is a place to remember that. But so much of this book literally teaches behaviors and thought processes that lead to horribly controlling and abusive scenarios.
"Home is a kind of kingdom with rulers, laws, and subjects, each with a part to perform in order that life there shall be perfect, or at least the best it can be. The form of government of the home is the oldest known to earth, the patriarchal. Here the father is the head, the lawgiver, and the judge. He divides almost equally his authority with the mother, and they together govern the small kingdom. This is the only form of government that is suitable for the family, for the children are too young and too inexperienced to make laws for themselves. Not only have the parents the full authority over the family, but upon them rests the responsibility of the family's support, and of their conduct. If they do not properly care for or manage their children, they will suffer reproach and shame. To be able to fit into the home-life and submit to the home government is one of the most noble traits of young girlhood. This is not always accomplished without a struggle on the girl's part; for when the years of fickle, changing youth are upon a girl, she finds that something in her nature rebels against the restraint of home. [...] She feels as if she is being pressed into a mold that does not fit, while her whole heart cries out for freedom [...]." (P. 114)
^Even though I have literally lived this and experienced this quote, it knocked the wind out of me to see it written so plainly and phrased as such a good thing. The dad is the head, lawgiver, and judge? Only God meets this definition (and to take a it a step further, He is so much more than that - this says nothing about grace, kindness, and love!). In this book, a girl is to turn her back on the feelings of being pressed into a mold that she cannot or does not want to fit, but she is never told that this isn’t a healthy thing. If you live in such controlling situations, there is a reason why a girl wants freedom - and she is fully right to do so.
“She should always respect her father’s right to direct her life, to say what she shall and shall not do, to forbid her to go anywhere that is not proper. His word to her should be final. His approval should be considered a blessing.” (P. 117)
^It is a father’s RIGHT to direct her life? Note here that under no circumstances is the girl even to have a say. The word is final. Yes, parents should gently give advice. But to say that a father’s word is final and it is his right to do what he pleases with her life is horrific. Again, literally cultivating a culture for abuse and control.
“Mother must look after so many details of her daughter’s life that her overseeing may seem bothersome to the girl. There is a certain time in a girl’s life when her mother has to be responsible for the way her daughter arranges her hair, wears her dresses, and for her whereabouts and who she is with, practically every hour of the day. Not only in childhood does the girl need this oversight, but while she is in her teens also. […] This is hard for the mother and discouraging for the daughter. […] Now is the time for the daughter to submit, to wait, to look well to her ways. Only when her parents see that she can bear responsibility will they willingly give it to her.” (P. 118)
^Again, guidance is good. That’s a key part of being a parent. But this very much implies that a mother should be controlling what her daughter is wearing and doing at all hours of her life in her teens. This is controlling and another sign of a culture of abuse.
Quote 1: “When we dress contrary to the rule of modesty we give excuse for unwholesome thoughts in the minds of those who look upon us, and every girl who oversteps these bounds makes herself liable to misunderstanding and insult, though she may be innocent of any such intention. […] to a great extent we are responsible for our brothers’ thoughts.” (P. 123) And quote 2: “She should remember that she meets all kinds of people in public places, and among them may be some men who would desire to take evil advantage upon any carelessness in this respect. It is for her protection and good name that we insist upon a public attire that is modest and unassuming. The more simple the outfit the better. (P. 129)
^In both of these quotes directly above, the onus of guilt is placed on girls’ dress and/or where she has allowed herself to be without proper chaperoning, while giving men and boys an excuse to think thoughts or act in ways that are not appropriate.
“If girls allow themselves to fancy they are in love when they are yet very young, they will form extreme attachments, imagining they are desperately in love, only to have this passion pass away to give place to a new fancy. Thus in a few years the store of love that should have a husband and home is frittered away on this one and that, and they are left almost without ability to love.” (P. 160)
^Hellooooo purity culture. Attractions and interests and believing oneself to be in love at a young age is actually natural. Yes, there are lines that should not be crossed and parents should be there for gentle advice, guidance, and protection. But if such lines ARE crossed, that does not mean that you lose the ability to love. Saving yourself for only one boyfriend turned husband in absolute sexual purity does not necessarily set you up for success in marriage. (Especially when such teachings above are used as shaming devices.)
“The experience of heart-purity is not for anyone who cherishes any thought or feeling that is impure. If envy, or jealousy, or pride, or arrogance, or any kindred evil is allowed a place, the Spirit of God will not come to cleanse and fill His temple.” (P. 196)
^uhm, while these are things that happen due to the fall of humanity and are not of God, everyone (Christian or not) does experience these four lines of thought. And you can still be a Christian indwelt by the Holy Spirit while struggling with the effects from the fall of humanity.
“There is no other cure for self-consciousness like keeping busy and interested in others. Those terrible feelings come only to those who have time to entertain them.” (P. 198)
^Can I move to the planet where this was written? Because I can be busy and helping others and still have self-conscious doubts in my head.
Books are a powerful force. As parents, we would do well to provide books that are helpful, encouraging, and gently guiding to our children. Beautiful Girlhood, revised by Karen Andreola, is a perfect case study to portray the types of books we should NOT be giving to our children.
This review and others are posted on my website: https://sarwilson.substack.com/p/when...
I cannot state more clearly that this book is a perfect book to give your daughter IF you want her to be set up for abusive, shaming relationships - as a daughter, girlfriend, or wife. Since I’m pretty sure none of us desire our daughters to be in such situations, I would not ever recommend this book.
As I reread the book, I wrote down quote after quote of why this book is so problematic, along with my reasons as to why it is such. The legalistic, shaming, controlling information in this book caused much harm in my life, my friends’ lives, and our entire generation. It’s appalling to me that there are people still giving this book to their daughters today. I am all for giving high quality books of faith and Christianity to our children…but this is not a book that speaks love, freedom, and grace into anyone’s lives.
While this book is presented as fact and gospel truth, it’s actually mostly opinion & conjecture. While I usually reserve 1 star ratings for books I could not finish & only skimmed to the end, I did finish this one, and I cannot justify giving it a higher rating (though I probably could justify giving it a lower one if such a thing existed).
If you continue reading this review you will be reading direct quotes from the book. Below each quote are my thoughts as to why each of these quotes are problematic. The quotes I have italicized to make it more clear which parts are direct quotes from the book and which parts are my written thoughts. Please note, these quotes are not the only problematic parts of the book. I would say a good 85-90% of the book is filled with very similar instruction and guidance. But since I cannot type out the entire book to issue a rebuttal, here are the parts that made most sense for me to deal with:
“When I was about fourteen, Mother was making me a new dress, and I wanted the sleeves made very full at the hand and open from the elbow down. They were very ugly and very unhandy, and always falling into everything, and it was winter and very cold: but I wanted the sleeves made that way no matter what was said to me. Mother set her lips together and said, ‘Well, you shall have them.’ Her look called me to my senses, and I began to back down, but she said, ‘No, you shall have them just as you want them,’ and I had to drag and dribble those sleeves around till the dress was worn out. I found out that it was just a notion, which lasted but a short while, that I wanted such sleeves, and that my real self despised them. Mother knew that all the time. I am not blaming you for being changeable, but I want you to see that you are changing, and not to expect everyone to change with you.” (P. 23)
^What? So the girl starts to change her mind and think through it, but no, the mother doesn’t have a conversation with her and instead manipulatively decides to make the daughter think it’s her own fault for wearing the hideous sleeves all winter because she had a thought that wasn’t then guided into discussion in a mature manner? That’s not healthy. It should be gently discussed together, and if a child changes their opinion (which this girl was beginning to do!) not forced to reap the consequences of a fleeting thought when a sensible solution was about to be proposed & brought to light.
“You think of your mother as being unkind and possibly unjust. She thinks of you as being stubborn and ungrateful.” (P. 25)
^Why are we pitting family members against each other? This can be resolved with healthy communication. I DO know that some of these thoughts do happen in families…but encouraging it and stating it as fact and normal does not help it get better.
“Keep acquainted with your father also. […] He is busy and may not take the initiative in a hearty relationship; but he will appreciate the kind approaches of his young daughter if she comes to him smiling and seeking to know him better.” (P. 25)
^Um…what?! So the burden of relationship is on the daughter?! And she has to act like all is well and make her father happy by being the adult in this relationship? Speaking from experience of LIVING this exact scenario, I can say that it is not healthy in any way, shape, or form. No matter how busy a father is, he should always have time for his children. Now yes, there might be certain days where a daughter might need to take a little initiative…but if as a whole we are saying a father is too busy for his daughter, and the daughter needs to be the one continually reaching out then this is a big problem. And not one that the daughter needs to fix; it is solely on the father’s shoulders.
“But the one [girl] who is endeavoring to build good character takes heed to the commands given her, whether good or bad, and receives the admonitions and reproofs that come her way and governs herself by them, because it is right to do so.” (P. 38)
^ Training children to obey bad commands leads to them one day not knowing when to put up boundaries and say no in the face of evil, wrong, and abuse. It literally teaches them that they cannot have a say in unsafe and/or abusive, controlling situations.
“A happy heart, a smiling face, loving words and deeds, and a desire to be of service, will make any girl beautiful.” (P. 42)
^While this statement on its own isn’t completely wrong, when the book is filled with such statements, it definitely leaves the impression that if you want good character and to be a beautiful woman, you must smile & serve, with no complaints or thought put into what you specifically might like or not like. Many other statements throughout the book also suggest that a woman must always look put together and neat to show she cares, but not put too much effort into her appearance because that is vanity.
“…let us choose together the ideal woman. […] A truly ideal woman must not be one who is silly or frivolous, nor shall she be guilty of actions that appear vulgar or undermining. She must be sweet-voiced and gentle. How a loud, boisterous woman jars on one’s feelings! […] Her clothing must be modest and becoming — how could an ideal woman wear anything that would cause those looking on to be overly adorned with ornaments, but rather she must be known for the beauty of her character. […] She must be a good housewife and a good mother.” (P. 75)
^Not sure I can even unpack all of this. Who defines what is silly, frivolous, and boisterous? The person trying to control the girl? There is nothing wrong with having fun, but in Christian communities this is often defined in those condemning terms. So a woman must not be outspoken? Why? Because it’s a threat to those in the authority chain above her? She must be pretty and well meaning, but cannot enjoy fun niceties in her appearance? And heaven help that a girl could stoop to less than marriage and motherhood…..?
“It is not enough to have good ideals alone. There must be a careful and persistent effort to live up to them. To reach these ideals often costs the sacrifice of other things that seem pleasant. Like the merchant of old who found a pearl of greatest price and sold all that he has to purchase it, so a girl to keep her ideals pure must be willing to give up all else for them. And a girl will sacrifice much for her ideal, be it good or bad.” (P. 76)
^ This concept that we have to give up what matters most to reach an ideal is so damaging. Sometimes we do have to make hard choices to get to a better place. But oftentimes those in abusive or controlling authority roles convince a girl she needs to let go of something in the name of Christian suffering to be who God wants her to be…and it is simply a control mechanism to conform a girl to an ideal held by those in authority.
“More down-to-earth are a girl’s dreams of a husband, a home, and children. One can imagine how she will be a true wife, a good mother, and helpful neighbor. […] Such dreams […] are true character builders. […] Yet again, a girl may allow her dreams to dwell upon things that are not pure, and she may taste of forbidden pleasures through her imaginations. This imagination is fueled through the reading of romance novels and in some motion pictures. It is possible for her to become vile in her heart and mind by unclean thoughts, and yet live apparently a pure life. By such dreaming, a girl drops all her guards and when the temptation comes strong, may fall into acts of sin.” (P. 93)
^Where to start? So have we decided that the most holy of all dreams for a girl to have is to be a wife and mother? It is NOT a bad dream, but it is also NOT more holy. Furthermore, we’ve managed to demonize romance novels (there are absolutely some inappropriate ones out there, but this just lumped them all together), along with motion pictures AND imagination. Imagination is a beautiful thing, and some stories with romance in them are powerful stories that fuel much learning and growth….and even if they aren’t wholly appropriate, why exactly are we scared of them? Wouldn’t it be better to trust that we can discuss them together and learn from the mistakes or values displayed within the stories?
“The only dreams that are worthwhile are those than can be, and are, worked out in practical everyday life. […] Dream, but let dreams be of usefulness and service, of purity and truth.” (P. 95)
^ There are many dreams that should be encouraged even if they cannot come true at this moment. There are so many dreams that are fully ok, but they simply aren’t for this exact moment. Some dreams also might not be practical at any phase of life, but that doesn’t mean that they are bad. To claim they aren’t worthwhile, or even dangerous, is blatantly false.
“The safest girl is the one who makes her mother her most confidential friend. Mother knows and loves her best. It is Mother to whom she may share her most personal dreams, insecurities, or concerns.” (P. 99)
^For some girls this may be true. I have an amazing mother, but in this girlhood stage of life, there were things that weren’t safe to share even with her. This puts a burden on a girl to think that she must tell everything to her mother and expect it to be a good thing….and that simply isn’t safe for everyone. (And honestly, based on other things in this book, the mothers who would strongly encourage a book like this are honestly LESS likely to be safe.)
“When girls have friends among boys, even more care should be used in their selection and treatment than with girls. There is only a small margin between the love of friendship and romance, and what the girl may have begun only as a friendship may develop into something more serious. Also, if a girl will make herself too familiar with her friendships with the opposite sex, she is liable to give them a wrong conception of her. She may appear to them to be only a ‘good fellow’ and they may interpret that to mean that she has let down some of her womanly guards and does not expect to be treated with the deference and respect usually given to good women. Any girl is in a dangerous position when she gets this reputation.” (P. 100)
^ The demonization of friendships between the sexes really needs to stop. Also, note that in this scenario, the onus of guilt is on the girl for developing a relationship with the guys. Her only “guilt” is friendliness, but now if they treat her inappropriately, she brought it on herself. Nowhere is it mentioned that the guys did not treat her with respect and that is solely on their shoulders.
This quote from the book is stated by a man who has turned a cold shoulder to a girl he had been interested. “I overheard the conversations of some of the men, and learned that you were known among them as one who joined in their jokes and frivolity and some of them even made slighting remarks to me about my friendship with you. Forgive me, but you have forced me to speak plainly. I want my wife to have a record of womanliness and purity. […] Your conduct does not always give the appearance of innocence. The girl men will joke with is not the girl they will marry.” (P. 101)
^ In this character study, the only crime the girl had committed was being friendly and joking with guys at work. She was not even dating, let alone sleeping around. It is implied she was supposed to be a demure lady at her desk ignoring all around her - but no, she had fun and made some jokes. And as such, she is made out to be a woman without character or virtue.
“One who has kindness of heart is able to look upon the failings of others with consideration and patience, for she remembers that she herself is not without fault.” (P. 108)
^There is an element of truth to this statement. But often this argument is made within narcissistic, abusive, and controlling situations to gaslight the victim into not realizing the full severity and inappropriateness of the abuse. All people have faults. 100%. And there is a place to remember that. But so much of this book literally teaches behaviors and thought processes that lead to horribly controlling and abusive scenarios.
"Home is a kind of kingdom with rulers, laws, and subjects, each with a part to perform in order that life there shall be perfect, or at least the best it can be. The form of government of the home is the oldest known to earth, the patriarchal. Here the father is the head, the lawgiver, and the judge. He divides almost equally his authority with the mother, and they together govern the small kingdom. This is the only form of government that is suitable for the family, for the children are too young and too inexperienced to make laws for themselves. Not only have the parents the full authority over the family, but upon them rests the responsibility of the family's support, and of their conduct. If they do not properly care for or manage their children, they will suffer reproach and shame. To be able to fit into the home-life and submit to the home government is one of the most noble traits of young girlhood. This is not always accomplished without a struggle on the girl's part; for when the years of fickle, changing youth are upon a girl, she finds that something in her nature rebels against the restraint of home. [...] She feels as if she is being pressed into a mold that does not fit, while her whole heart cries out for freedom [...]." (P. 114)
^Even though I have literally lived this and experienced this quote, it knocked the wind out of me to see it written so plainly and phrased as such a good thing. The dad is the head, lawgiver, and judge? Only God meets this definition (and to take a it a step further, He is so much more than that - this says nothing about grace, kindness, and love!). In this book, a girl is to turn her back on the feelings of being pressed into a mold that she cannot or does not want to fit, but she is never told that this isn’t a healthy thing. If you live in such controlling situations, there is a reason why a girl wants freedom - and she is fully right to do so.
“She should always respect her father’s right to direct her life, to say what she shall and shall not do, to forbid her to go anywhere that is not proper. His word to her should be final. His approval should be considered a blessing.” (P. 117)
^It is a father’s RIGHT to direct her life? Note here that under no circumstances is the girl even to have a say. The word is final. Yes, parents should gently give advice. But to say that a father’s word is final and it is his right to do what he pleases with her life is horrific. Again, literally cultivating a culture for abuse and control.
“Mother must look after so many details of her daughter’s life that her overseeing may seem bothersome to the girl. There is a certain time in a girl’s life when her mother has to be responsible for the way her daughter arranges her hair, wears her dresses, and for her whereabouts and who she is with, practically every hour of the day. Not only in childhood does the girl need this oversight, but while she is in her teens also. […] This is hard for the mother and discouraging for the daughter. […] Now is the time for the daughter to submit, to wait, to look well to her ways. Only when her parents see that she can bear responsibility will they willingly give it to her.” (P. 118)
^Again, guidance is good. That’s a key part of being a parent. But this very much implies that a mother should be controlling what her daughter is wearing and doing at all hours of her life in her teens. This is controlling and another sign of a culture of abuse.
Quote 1: “When we dress contrary to the rule of modesty we give excuse for unwholesome thoughts in the minds of those who look upon us, and every girl who oversteps these bounds makes herself liable to misunderstanding and insult, though she may be innocent of any such intention. […] to a great extent we are responsible for our brothers’ thoughts.” (P. 123) And quote 2: “She should remember that she meets all kinds of people in public places, and among them may be some men who would desire to take evil advantage upon any carelessness in this respect. It is for her protection and good name that we insist upon a public attire that is modest and unassuming. The more simple the outfit the better. (P. 129)
^In both of these quotes directly above, the onus of guilt is placed on girls’ dress and/or where she has allowed herself to be without proper chaperoning, while giving men and boys an excuse to think thoughts or act in ways that are not appropriate.
“If girls allow themselves to fancy they are in love when they are yet very young, they will form extreme attachments, imagining they are desperately in love, only to have this passion pass away to give place to a new fancy. Thus in a few years the store of love that should have a husband and home is frittered away on this one and that, and they are left almost without ability to love.” (P. 160)
^Hellooooo purity culture. Attractions and interests and believing oneself to be in love at a young age is actually natural. Yes, there are lines that should not be crossed and parents should be there for gentle advice, guidance, and protection. But if such lines ARE crossed, that does not mean that you lose the ability to love. Saving yourself for only one boyfriend turned husband in absolute sexual purity does not necessarily set you up for success in marriage. (Especially when such teachings above are used as shaming devices.)
“The experience of heart-purity is not for anyone who cherishes any thought or feeling that is impure. If envy, or jealousy, or pride, or arrogance, or any kindred evil is allowed a place, the Spirit of God will not come to cleanse and fill His temple.” (P. 196)
^uhm, while these are things that happen due to the fall of humanity and are not of God, everyone (Christian or not) does experience these four lines of thought. And you can still be a Christian indwelt by the Holy Spirit while struggling with the effects from the fall of humanity.
“There is no other cure for self-consciousness like keeping busy and interested in others. Those terrible feelings come only to those who have time to entertain them.” (P. 198)
^Can I move to the planet where this was written? Because I can be busy and helping others and still have self-conscious doubts in my head.
Books are a powerful force. As parents, we would do well to provide books that are helpful, encouraging, and gently guiding to our children. Beautiful Girlhood, revised by Karen Andreola, is a perfect case study to portray the types of books we should NOT be giving to our children.
This review and others are posted on my website: https://sarwilson.substack.com/p/when...
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October 19, 2017I read this a long, long time ago with my mom and sister for school, and let’s just say, a lot of what I read was lost on me. (I was 7, 8, 9... somewhere in there.) It kind of disgusted me at the time, when I was really rather a tomboy. xD But what I do remember now was some great advice, and I’m glad I read it, even if it was torture to my younger self. :P
June 20, 2016
I wish I'd read this when I was around 11. Even though I'm past the target age, I did still get a lot of worth out of it, and now I'm prepared to use it with my own future daughters.
August 31, 2023
The basic overview:
Beautiful Girlhood has a lot of deep wisdom and hard truths contained in it that are very necessary for a girl growing into a woman, and it is a wonderful guide on how to live a life of virtue wholly devoted to God.
The story behind my reading this:
I read this as a young girl with my mom for the first time. Since then, I have often turned to specific chapters that are relevant to the situations in life that I face, trying to seek good advice, and there are other times that I have turned to the book as a whole for a much needed re-read.
The lesson I learned:
I have learned many lessons from this book, many easy, others very helpful, and others quite painful. I will not go into too many details, but the hardest lesson was leaving my own copy of it out in the rain. Yes, it is a paperback, but it is hardened and crusty, a painful reminder not to leave my own beautiful girlhood out in the rain.
The part that affected me most:
I think the chapter that I have turned the most to may be the chapters (confessedly), about boyfriends, and when a girl goes out. Both chapters reminded me about guarding my purity, and how I even dress can make an impact on the men and boys around me. But I truly feel that there are many chapters that I can turn to and still start crying, remembering my own innocent girlhood and all of the hard lessons I have learned.
What I felt God telling me through this book:
The ideal girl -- she's possible to be like! If I work hard, I can reach her.
How this book changed me:
You know, I wanted to be just like the ideal girl that it talks about -- pure, quiet, gentle, and kind. But how it truly made a change in my behavior, is that I felt more aware of myself, and the way that I acted, both at home and out.
My recommendation:
I would definitely recommend this book! (And if anyone is up for the challenge to edit it to make the examples more relevant for our modern times, I think that would really boost up its readers once again.)
Things to be wary of:
While some of the advice and opinions of the author are sometimes more on an extreme, or maybe some might even call it "old fashioned", level, I think that we all can still apply many of the good things it has to say, to our daily lives, no matter how "old fashioned" some ideas may be. Some things are extreme, like the idea that dressing modestly means to dress plainly, or the idea that if a girl paints her face with cosmetics, it will give other people the wrong impression of her.
Think Philippians 4:8:
This advice is definitely true, and noble. The insight and wisdom is right, absolutely pure, and lovely. This book is very admirable, excellent, and worthy of praise! I would say, that it is good to think about the things in this book.
Things I liked about it:
I liked how the advice, though general, was still applicable despite it being sort of "old-fashioned". (See below). I loved and wanted to be like the girl that it described.
Things I didn't like about it:
I didn't agree with it when it would say that dressing boldly, and wearing makeup, is bad. But I think the gist on that topic was that the author didn't think that "dressing to impress" or to draw attention to oneself is appropriate, and I do agree with that. However, a girl can definitely dress with clothing that complements and flatters her, and if her style is bold, then she is absolutely fine to dress that way, because it is part of her personality.
Overall, I think that though some things might feel a little extreme and strict, this book has a lot of very good virtuous advice about guarding a girl's purity, and keeping room in her heart for God, striving to live a life for Him.
Beautiful Girlhood has a lot of deep wisdom and hard truths contained in it that are very necessary for a girl growing into a woman, and it is a wonderful guide on how to live a life of virtue wholly devoted to God.
The story behind my reading this:
I read this as a young girl with my mom for the first time. Since then, I have often turned to specific chapters that are relevant to the situations in life that I face, trying to seek good advice, and there are other times that I have turned to the book as a whole for a much needed re-read.
The lesson I learned:
I have learned many lessons from this book, many easy, others very helpful, and others quite painful. I will not go into too many details, but the hardest lesson was leaving my own copy of it out in the rain. Yes, it is a paperback, but it is hardened and crusty, a painful reminder not to leave my own beautiful girlhood out in the rain.
The part that affected me most:
I think the chapter that I have turned the most to may be the chapters (confessedly), about boyfriends, and when a girl goes out. Both chapters reminded me about guarding my purity, and how I even dress can make an impact on the men and boys around me. But I truly feel that there are many chapters that I can turn to and still start crying, remembering my own innocent girlhood and all of the hard lessons I have learned.
What I felt God telling me through this book:
The ideal girl -- she's possible to be like! If I work hard, I can reach her.
How this book changed me:
You know, I wanted to be just like the ideal girl that it talks about -- pure, quiet, gentle, and kind. But how it truly made a change in my behavior, is that I felt more aware of myself, and the way that I acted, both at home and out.
My recommendation:
I would definitely recommend this book! (And if anyone is up for the challenge to edit it to make the examples more relevant for our modern times, I think that would really boost up its readers once again.)
Things to be wary of:
While some of the advice and opinions of the author are sometimes more on an extreme, or maybe some might even call it "old fashioned", level, I think that we all can still apply many of the good things it has to say, to our daily lives, no matter how "old fashioned" some ideas may be. Some things are extreme, like the idea that dressing modestly means to dress plainly, or the idea that if a girl paints her face with cosmetics, it will give other people the wrong impression of her.
Think Philippians 4:8:
This advice is definitely true, and noble. The insight and wisdom is right, absolutely pure, and lovely. This book is very admirable, excellent, and worthy of praise! I would say, that it is good to think about the things in this book.
Things I liked about it:
I liked how the advice, though general, was still applicable despite it being sort of "old-fashioned". (See below). I loved and wanted to be like the girl that it described.
Things I didn't like about it:
I didn't agree with it when it would say that dressing boldly, and wearing makeup, is bad. But I think the gist on that topic was that the author didn't think that "dressing to impress" or to draw attention to oneself is appropriate, and I do agree with that. However, a girl can definitely dress with clothing that complements and flatters her, and if her style is bold, then she is absolutely fine to dress that way, because it is part of her personality.
Overall, I think that though some things might feel a little extreme and strict, this book has a lot of very good virtuous advice about guarding a girl's purity, and keeping room in her heart for God, striving to live a life for Him.
February 15, 2018
Read this aloud with my 13-year-old. We read the original version, maybe the revised version is better. Some timeless wisdom but much is law with no gospel. One chapter mentions Christ and some chapters mention a vague “God” and he is depicted only as judge. It’s a useful book for young ladies (and interesting to note how much culture has changed since it was written!) but we followed most chapters up with more discussion on law and grace.
May 20, 2019
I sat down with my 12 and 15 year old daughters and read through this book with them. We had the study guide that goes along with it. We took our time. Sometimes we would read a chapter and do the study guide questions in one day and other times we would take a few days to get through the chapter and study guide.
This book touches on so many great topics. From home life to boyfriends. There’s so much material. My girls and I had some great discussions. We might not have agreed with everything in this book, but it caused us to really think about the Lord and what the Bible says about these topics.
If you are looking for a book to read alongside your daughter this is one to consider. It’s not one to just hand to a girl to read alone. She needs to read it with her mother, aunt, grandmother, or a woman who loves her.
This book touches on so many great topics. From home life to boyfriends. There’s so much material. My girls and I had some great discussions. We might not have agreed with everything in this book, but it caused us to really think about the Lord and what the Bible says about these topics.
If you are looking for a book to read alongside your daughter this is one to consider. It’s not one to just hand to a girl to read alone. She needs to read it with her mother, aunt, grandmother, or a woman who loves her.
April 5, 2025
I pre-read this book on the eve of bringing our second baby girl into the world and I look forward in hope and faith to eventually read this book together with both of them. I am thinking this will serve as some kind of "rite of passage" book into navigating the pre-teen and teen years. Some examples may feel a bit outdated, but there are so many timeless truths and principles that all women would do well to heed that far outweighs what might feel out of date. I found myself personally exhorted and reminded of the biblical womanhood ideals to live out before my girls by way of example long before we have an intentional conversation about them.
April 28, 2019
This an old fashioned book about how to be a lady. Written for young teens. I found it a helpful reminder although I knew most of the stuff. It talked on how to act and relate to your parents and others, good character traits, understanding how your changing, etc.
June 1, 2016
Had some good points and lessons; I found it best reading two to three chapters only at a time.
February 14, 2019
ALL THE GIRLS OUT THERE, READ THIS! such a great book. I think every young women needs to read this, it touches so many day to day tasks and things that women/girls deal with.
January 13, 2021
I was happy to see a re-release of Beautiful Girlhood, as it was a book that I remembered reading when I was younger.
The advice overall is sound, though some of it I do not fully agree with as an adult - but majority of it is simply helpful advice about how to protect a young girl's innocence early in life and grow into a mature adult.
I think as long as you read the book beforehand and decide what parts are right for your daughters and your family, it can still be a valuable read overall.
***Thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for the digital ARC of this book. All views and opinions expressed in this review are my own.***
The advice overall is sound, though some of it I do not fully agree with as an adult - but majority of it is simply helpful advice about how to protect a young girl's innocence early in life and grow into a mature adult.
I think as long as you read the book beforehand and decide what parts are right for your daughters and your family, it can still be a valuable read overall.
***Thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for the digital ARC of this book. All views and opinions expressed in this review are my own.***
October 8, 2008
This little treasure is just what I'm needing. I have a desire to start a group for girls and I am finding ideas left and right.
This is a small treasure. Yet I have had ideas for a momschool club come to my mind and I think it's a little early yet for my girls or maybe not. As I prepare myself I'll probably find the times has passed quickly and my girls are ready.
Every character of personality and the development of girlhood into young womanhood is covered.
I wish I could give a copy to all women.
This is a small treasure. Yet I have had ideas for a momschool club come to my mind and I think it's a little early yet for my girls or maybe not. As I prepare myself I'll probably find the times has passed quickly and my girls are ready.
Every character of personality and the development of girlhood into young womanhood is covered.
I wish I could give a copy to all women.
March 17, 2020
I read this book with my daughter, and we both found it incredibly boring.
There has got to be a better way to share these character traits, goals, and godly wisdom with our young people.
"There is a beauty so deep and lasting that it will shine out of the homeliest face and make it pretty."
That is a quote from a chapter about inward beauty. I understand that this statement is true, but there has got to be a more prudent way to share this message. I found the wording laughable and patronizing, especially for those who are "homely."
There has got to be a better way to share these character traits, goals, and godly wisdom with our young people.
"There is a beauty so deep and lasting that it will shine out of the homeliest face and make it pretty."
That is a quote from a chapter about inward beauty. I understand that this statement is true, but there has got to be a more prudent way to share this message. I found the wording laughable and patronizing, especially for those who are "homely."
October 1, 2009
Discovered this accidentally. Read this as a teenager, and despite being incredibly dated, it had beautiful expressed poetic sentiments on the nature of becoming a woman. Still recall the impact it had on me.
August 30, 2014
You think this book is for young ladies. I am 53 and wanted to read this along with my 18 year old daughter.
I learned so much. I was not raised in a Christian home and learned so much from this book.
You are never too old to learn.
I learned so much. I was not raised in a Christian home and learned so much from this book.
You are never too old to learn.
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May 22, 2015" None of us can afford to be anything but what is good and pure and true!" A great book to read with your growing daughter to help her understand the changes in her body and spirit. Beautifully written.
June 23, 2009
this book is really good and its great for bible stuy too!! I love it!!
January 9, 2011
Emma and I are reading this together....so far, so good. This is a much easier read than Raising Maidens of Virtue.
May 24, 2020
Ok, so I'm kinda torn on my review of this. Was it a good book? Yes. Was it boring? Yes.
So, this book was mostly about instilling in each young generation of girls a set of core values and ideals. Basically it's teaching young girls how to be a "young lady." Now these sets of core values, while really good in one sense, but some ideals are just really outdated. For instance, at the risk of sounding like a die–hard feminist, the book kinda preaches a "women's main job is to be a mother and a housewife" story. Now, when this was originally written (i.e. the 1920s, I believe), this was a common belief. But now, good grief! We are in the 21st Century; women can have literally ANY job that they may want. For me, my goal in life is not to be a housewife; I want to work and leave my mark on the world—regardless of the size of the mark—but does that make me a bad person, a horrible person going against nature?? Heck no!
But why didn't I give it less than 3 stars? Well, despite being very outdated, there are some good ideals throughout. For instance, it preaches modesty and purity, which although isn't a major thing now, I believe it should be. Also the book addresses some common faults among women and how to overcome them. It also takes a more conservative, religious outlook on everything, which I don't think is bad. But the best thing about it is basically about character building, honesty, truthfullness, and trustworthiness—all very important things, regardless of time period.
Overall, it wasn't too bad, but some of it (again) was very outdated. To those of you thinking about reading this, I'd say read it! As with many books, take what you believe is good, and leave the outdated stuff in the past.
So, this book was mostly about instilling in each young generation of girls a set of core values and ideals. Basically it's teaching young girls how to be a "young lady." Now these sets of core values, while really good in one sense, but some ideals are just really outdated. For instance, at the risk of sounding like a die–hard feminist, the book kinda preaches a "women's main job is to be a mother and a housewife" story. Now, when this was originally written (i.e. the 1920s, I believe), this was a common belief. But now, good grief! We are in the 21st Century; women can have literally ANY job that they may want. For me, my goal in life is not to be a housewife; I want to work and leave my mark on the world—regardless of the size of the mark—but does that make me a bad person, a horrible person going against nature?? Heck no!
But why didn't I give it less than 3 stars? Well, despite being very outdated, there are some good ideals throughout. For instance, it preaches modesty and purity, which although isn't a major thing now, I believe it should be. Also the book addresses some common faults among women and how to overcome them. It also takes a more conservative, religious outlook on everything, which I don't think is bad. But the best thing about it is basically about character building, honesty, truthfullness, and trustworthiness—all very important things, regardless of time period.
Overall, it wasn't too bad, but some of it (again) was very outdated. To those of you thinking about reading this, I'd say read it! As with many books, take what you believe is good, and leave the outdated stuff in the past.
May 27, 2025
I read this as a young girl and just finished reading it with my daughters. While at times it’s highly antiquated, the heart of this book still shines! There is so much to be learned from books written outside our time!
December 27, 2025
This book was full of practical and biblical wisdom and advice for raising daughters, but I found it especially convicting for me, as I look at all of the ways I have fallen short in these areas. It was at the same time helpful, convicting, and encouraging!
November 29, 2021
Lots of good advice, though some is dated. I found it a bit over the head of my 10yo. Would have been better when she was 12-14 age.
February 25, 2025
I have read this book several times and I enjoy it better each time I read it. While parts of this book are perhaps a tad old-fashioned, there are still lessons we can learn from this sweet book.
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October 16, 2025Some of this was great, providing sweet conversation with my girls. Other times it felt dated or hard to apply to life today.
February 11, 2019
This is a fantastic mother-daughter devotional that gently discusses a variety of coming-of-age issues, and it is now one of my most favorite reads. I’m giving 4 stars to the Kindle version, which we used when on-the-go, but the Karen Andreola revised print version definitely deserves 5 stars!
We used this devotional once or twice weekly and alternated it with a Bible survey curriculum. I liked the practical life application of this, especially when coupled with the Companion Guide to Beautiful Girlhood. It led to some very deep, meaningful conversations that my daughter and I will always treasure. The content in the book itself and the questions in the companion guide sparked many conversations that would not have been easy for me to initiate, but these were much-needed talks between the two of us. I really appreciate how the material naturally prompted questions from my daughter that she wouldn’t have necessarily asked otherwise.
This book deals with the social and emotional issues a girl experiences as she transitions from girlhood to womanhood, how it is normal for her feelings to fluctuate, vacillating between wanting to play with dolls one moment and then feeling foolish for doing so afterwards, and how and why she must be careful to shape and guard her character carefully as she matures. In a convicting yet conversational and non-confrontational manner, the book delicately discusses everything from disrespectful attitudes towards parents, avoiding the natural tendency towards selfishness when asked to do chores (while also taking the immensities of parental responsibilities into consideration), obedience to authority figures (and God), walking circumspectly, and remaining true to godly principles amidst peer pressure (from male and female peers). It examines choosing friends wisely and taking time to connect with dad despite his hectic schedule, and the need for a girl to initiate quality father-daughter time, since dad has an unspoken desire to spend time with an adolescent daughter but often find it difficult to relate to the ever-changing young woman before him, and he sometimes assumes she’d rather surround herself with female company. The devotional delves into examining the motives behind one’s ideals, aligning ambitions in accordance to God’s will, taming the tongue and temper, maintaining purity, ensuring entertainment choices don’t erode Christian character, being friends with boys, discerning and avoiding superficiality, and consecrating one’s life to Christ, with eternity in the forefront of life’s landscape.
So many times my daughter and I laughed together as examples were given throughout, especially when my daughter could relate to negative attitudes, obstinance, and mood swings! But these moments weren’t included to merely entertain readers: Hale uniquely, gently, and effectively uses the examples to rebuke without giving rise to resentment from teen audiences. How I wish I could always emulate this approach in my everyday interactions with my daughter!
The revised Karen Andreola version has been updated without compromising the caliber of the original content, and I prefer Andreola’s edition since the original does shift the fulcrum of admonishment’s scale in a somewhat legalistic direction at times. While there are some negative reviews out there on this book, it is such a treasure trove of Christ-centered instruction, and what its critics deem dated can be easily overlooked. Sure, your teen daughter won’t be flirting with a boy at a train station these days (as when this book was initially published), but the scenarios are still relevant even when the setting seems anachronistic in a couple of instances. The information contained therein is far from antiquated: many popular books of our day will eventually date themselves as technology gradually evolves, but that will not invalidate basic truths and tenets that transcend time.
We used this devotional once or twice weekly and alternated it with a Bible survey curriculum. I liked the practical life application of this, especially when coupled with the Companion Guide to Beautiful Girlhood. It led to some very deep, meaningful conversations that my daughter and I will always treasure. The content in the book itself and the questions in the companion guide sparked many conversations that would not have been easy for me to initiate, but these were much-needed talks between the two of us. I really appreciate how the material naturally prompted questions from my daughter that she wouldn’t have necessarily asked otherwise.
This book deals with the social and emotional issues a girl experiences as she transitions from girlhood to womanhood, how it is normal for her feelings to fluctuate, vacillating between wanting to play with dolls one moment and then feeling foolish for doing so afterwards, and how and why she must be careful to shape and guard her character carefully as she matures. In a convicting yet conversational and non-confrontational manner, the book delicately discusses everything from disrespectful attitudes towards parents, avoiding the natural tendency towards selfishness when asked to do chores (while also taking the immensities of parental responsibilities into consideration), obedience to authority figures (and God), walking circumspectly, and remaining true to godly principles amidst peer pressure (from male and female peers). It examines choosing friends wisely and taking time to connect with dad despite his hectic schedule, and the need for a girl to initiate quality father-daughter time, since dad has an unspoken desire to spend time with an adolescent daughter but often find it difficult to relate to the ever-changing young woman before him, and he sometimes assumes she’d rather surround herself with female company. The devotional delves into examining the motives behind one’s ideals, aligning ambitions in accordance to God’s will, taming the tongue and temper, maintaining purity, ensuring entertainment choices don’t erode Christian character, being friends with boys, discerning and avoiding superficiality, and consecrating one’s life to Christ, with eternity in the forefront of life’s landscape.
So many times my daughter and I laughed together as examples were given throughout, especially when my daughter could relate to negative attitudes, obstinance, and mood swings! But these moments weren’t included to merely entertain readers: Hale uniquely, gently, and effectively uses the examples to rebuke without giving rise to resentment from teen audiences. How I wish I could always emulate this approach in my everyday interactions with my daughter!
The revised Karen Andreola version has been updated without compromising the caliber of the original content, and I prefer Andreola’s edition since the original does shift the fulcrum of admonishment’s scale in a somewhat legalistic direction at times. While there are some negative reviews out there on this book, it is such a treasure trove of Christ-centered instruction, and what its critics deem dated can be easily overlooked. Sure, your teen daughter won’t be flirting with a boy at a train station these days (as when this book was initially published), but the scenarios are still relevant even when the setting seems anachronistic in a couple of instances. The information contained therein is far from antiquated: many popular books of our day will eventually date themselves as technology gradually evolves, but that will not invalidate basic truths and tenets that transcend time.
December 28, 2020
The world needs more young women comfortable in their faith and leading with boldness and grace. The Lord has designed women to fill a special place in society, one uniquely theirs. The world needs women (and men) who don't shy away from their own purposes, gifting, and destinies. Beautiful Girlhood was written as a guide helping young women through these challenges of character building, handling disappointment, obedience, responsibilities, and more.
This 100 year old book set for re-release sets out to usher young girls into womanhood. While these quick chapters may have been useful in the early 1900's, they are clearly outdated today. According to Hale's advice, girls should be meek and obedient, without any indication that they should also know their worth. Other examples of its outdatedness are Hale's inferences that crime books should be off limits as well as being out in public. Hale also speaks of a girl's need to know basic skills like cooking, cleaning, and homemaking. And while I agree that these are skills all young people should know, there's no instruction in these areas or indication in how to grow in these skills.
While I love the concept of a guidebook during this transition from girlhood to womanhood, this book is so clearly outdated that it's not worth the time or money to read it. The ideas in Beautiful Girlhood are so repressive; they spoil the beauty of strong Biblical womanhood. I cannot recommend this book in any capacity.
*Disclaimer: I received this book for free from the publisher. All opinions are my own.
This 100 year old book set for re-release sets out to usher young girls into womanhood. While these quick chapters may have been useful in the early 1900's, they are clearly outdated today. According to Hale's advice, girls should be meek and obedient, without any indication that they should also know their worth. Other examples of its outdatedness are Hale's inferences that crime books should be off limits as well as being out in public. Hale also speaks of a girl's need to know basic skills like cooking, cleaning, and homemaking. And while I agree that these are skills all young people should know, there's no instruction in these areas or indication in how to grow in these skills.
While I love the concept of a guidebook during this transition from girlhood to womanhood, this book is so clearly outdated that it's not worth the time or money to read it. The ideas in Beautiful Girlhood are so repressive; they spoil the beauty of strong Biblical womanhood. I cannot recommend this book in any capacity.
*Disclaimer: I received this book for free from the publisher. All opinions are my own.
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