Attachment-Focused Parenting: Effective Strategies to Care for Children (Norton Professional Books

by Daniel A. Hughes

An expert clinician brings attachment theory into the realm of parenting skills. Attachment security and affect regulation have long been buzzwords in therapy circles, but many of these ideas―so integral to successful therapeutic work with kids and adolescents― have yet to be effectively translated to parenting practice itself. Moreover, as neuroscience reveals how the human brain is designed to work in good relationships, and how such relationships are central to healthy human development, the practical implications for the parent-child attachment relationship become even more apparent.

Here, a leading attachment specialist with over 30 years of clinical experience brings the rich and comprehensive field of attachment theory and research from inside the therapy room to the outside, equipping therapists and caregivers with practical parenting skills and techniques rooted in proven therapeutic principles.

A guide for all parents and a resource for all mental health clinicians and parent-educators who are searching for ways to effectively love, discipline, and communicate with children, this book presents the techniques and practices that are fundamental to optimal child development and family functioning―how to set limits, provide guidance, and manage the responsibilities and difficulties of daily life, while at the same time communicating safety, fun, joy, and love. Filled with valuable clinical vignettes and sample dialogues, Hughes shows how attachment-focused research can guide all those who care for children in their efforts to better raise them.

Genres: Parenting, Psychology, Adoption, Nonfiction, Social Work

196 pages, Hardcover

First published November 24, 2008

Reviews

[Jodie Gale · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for all parents. This is not the kooky style of attachment parenting... rather, based on solid attachment theory. I have attended a workshop with Dan Hughes, he is so skilled and amazingly attuned to the children he works with. This book will make you are better parent. All caseworkers and those in the mental health professions should read.

[Sharon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book. It does a nice job of showing effective dialogue to practice how to respond to children with active listening. How to really connect to your children to help them learn about their own emotions and feel securely attached to you.

[Olivia S · Rating 2 out of 5]

I hate giving poor reviews to books that I believe were intended for another audience than me. I wish I could write a review without rating it 1 or 2 stars. I’m sure there are helpful things in this book, but unfortunately it’s hidden behind textbook prose. The opening line of the first chapter reads, “In understanding the nature of the parent–child relationship and the pivotal role of attachment, we are able to see its impact on a child’s emotional, cognitive, social, communicative, and even physiological and neurological development.” For someone who just wants to reap information from a good parenting book before bed time, that first sentence made my eyes glaze over. If you are a therapist or a college student studying this topic, then this book seems to be targeting you as it’s audience. As far as your average parent looking for tools to become a better parent? Search elsewhere.

Also… the number of exclamation marks on the dialogue was very distracting! I couldn’t help but picture the parents yelling back at their children! I wish I could stop! But it’s too late! Help!

[Tamara M · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent guide on attachment based parenting. Practical and insightful. I wasn't a huge fan of the examples at the end of each chapter majority of them seemed a bit 'forced' or unnatural, but besides that I would highly recommend this book to parents, caregivers, helping professionals, and anyone working or interacting with children.

[Stone · Rating 4 out of 5]

Attachment science is so important in the formation of a child's sense of self and how they relate to others once grown up.

[Jonathan Case · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this read. It is written with simplicity for the benefit of parents and has a lot of example dialogue to demonstrate the principles in action. It was interesting to read Hughes' clinical workbook with more therapeutic directives and greater depth prior to reading this one. With that deeper context I know that the principles presented here, although simple in presentation, contain great depth and therapeutic value. Also, I thought Hughes did a great job addressing the need for balance between connection and correction. Because the parenting approach grounded in attachment theory can feel "soft" I thought it was important and essential that Hughes emphasized the need for the parent to set limits and provide discipline, but showed a powerful way to do so. I would definitely recommend this book to the parents I work with as an accessible and straightforward guide to parenting.

[Terrie Harris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Real parenting!

The relationship between parent & child is the foundation of parenting. Not the authority, the material extra, the sticker board & tokens. This book helps identify the needs in this relationship & approaches on how to begin to address them in the context of promoting the relationship.

[Julia · Rating 5 out of 5]

A little bit of a clinical read, but I was able to get through it by focusing mostly on the dialogue exchanges. It's the book I turn to most for learning how to be an attachment focused parent. It's excellent at describing real life scenarios and how human beings interpret those instinctively unless we make a conscious effort to see past them.

[Lauri]

This was recommended by Nancy to me and an excellent read. I even took notes and wish that everyone who has kids who struggle with a sense of belonging, great insite and practices to instill at home. Great for kids who are adopted or children of divorced. Insiteful!

[Kristina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book! I recommend it to anyone who has or is thinking about having kids. Not written specifically for therapists but for parents.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great resource for helping children develop attachment to the parents/adults in their lives. Some of the conversations are a little cheesy, but there are a lot of examples and techniques to try.