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Real Differences
Middle-class, clever and white, Nick is a child of privilege while his best friend Andie is the daughter of Indo-Chinese refugees. Despite their very different backgrounds, they share a conviction they can change the world for the better.
At the outset, Nick is pushing papers in a dead-end job while Andie is embarking on a secular crusade against world poverty. This generates conflict with her white husband Benjamin, who feels that Australians should come first. Meanwhile, Andie's cousin, the teenage Tony is burdened by his parents’ traumatic past and impossible expectations. To their dismay, he finds solace in radical faith.
S. L. Lim acutely captures the dreams and disaffections of a millennial generation.
Real Differences is an emotionally resonant novel about idealism, ethical ambition, and love, filled with unforgettable characters. It ultimately asks us the most important question of all: What is our life for?
At the outset, Nick is pushing papers in a dead-end job while Andie is embarking on a secular crusade against world poverty. This generates conflict with her white husband Benjamin, who feels that Australians should come first. Meanwhile, Andie's cousin, the teenage Tony is burdened by his parents’ traumatic past and impossible expectations. To their dismay, he finds solace in radical faith.
S. L. Lim acutely captures the dreams and disaffections of a millennial generation.
Real Differences is an emotionally resonant novel about idealism, ethical ambition, and love, filled with unforgettable characters. It ultimately asks us the most important question of all: What is our life for?
288 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 1, 2019
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
December 19, 2023
Millenials thinking about things that we think about.
February 29, 2020
Real Differences (Transit Lounge 2019) by S.L. Lim dives deep into the existential angst of millennials and explores questions about disaffection, familial expectation, ambition, friendship, religious fervour, privilege, race, morality and radicalism. It is a novel that expects its readers to engage in some thought-provoking conversations around confronting their biases and assumptions of class, culture, ethnicity and status.
I have mixed feelings about this book. Firstly, I didn’t find the cover particularly appealing, and this is disappointing, because it put me off starting the book for a while. But then once I began reading, I immediately thought of Sally Rooney’s Normal People – this novel has that same feel about it, of young adult friendships growing into people in their twenties and thirties and still experiencing the tug of past ties. I didn’t find Real Differences nearly as compelling as Normal People, but admittedly that is a high bar – certainly if you enjoyed that book, this one may resonate with you. But I continued to have mixed feelings throughout the book. Sometimes I feel it delved too deep into navel-gazing, philosophical questions that slowed the narrative. At other times, I would suddenly read a sentence or a paragraph that shocked me with its pure, razor-sharp brilliance. I wanted to copy down these flashes of inspiration so that I would remember them. And then the book would slow again, for me anyway, and I would find it difficult to stay connected.
So what is my verdict? Well, I feel perhaps that this is a young and upcoming author who is still finding her voice and exploring the best way to confront the many questions she has about life. The novel is ambitious in its scope, as if Lim is using the story to navigate many different issues. I found it difficult to remain engaged throughout; but then, as I said, there were moments of focussed inspiration that stopped me in my tracks.
The story is about friendship and family, told from the perspectives of several characters. Nick has grown up with the advantage of white privilege. His best friend Andie, the daughter of Indo-Chinese refugees, is on a mission to change the world and fight poverty through the organisation for which she works, Real Difference. Andie’s husband Ben is white and their conflict about race and culture and class is a constant niggle to their relationship. Andie’s cousin, Tony, still only a teenager, is the focus of his parents’ high expectations, and finds his own path through radicalisation. I did find the delineation of the characters somewhat confusing at times, particularly towards the end of the book where we hear from more than one character’s perspective in the same chapter, sometimes changing from paragraph to paragraph. I’m not sure if this was deliberate on the part of the author, but if so, I’m not sure it worked – I found it a bit discombobulating.
But despite some criticisms of this book, I still kept reading. I did care about the characters and what happened to them. And as I noted, there were occasional flashes of brilliance – of observation or philosophical inquiry or thoughtfulness – that immediately switched me back on again.
And the messages or themes underpinning the narrative are compelling: an examination of racism and sexism, of cultural and gender issues, of the solace and the danger of radical religious beliefs, the divide between rich and poor, the argument of refugees versus economic migrants. Lim deftly depicts the insidious nature of sly racist comments that are not meant to hurt (‘because some of my best friends are Asian’) but that nevertheless cut to the quick. She states some uncomfortable truths and probes some pressures of traumatic family histories and upheavals. I suspect that for a particular audience, the characters and the family difficulties they face will resonate strongly. And the conclusion or climax is shocking and unexpected.
I have mixed feelings about this book. Firstly, I didn’t find the cover particularly appealing, and this is disappointing, because it put me off starting the book for a while. But then once I began reading, I immediately thought of Sally Rooney’s Normal People – this novel has that same feel about it, of young adult friendships growing into people in their twenties and thirties and still experiencing the tug of past ties. I didn’t find Real Differences nearly as compelling as Normal People, but admittedly that is a high bar – certainly if you enjoyed that book, this one may resonate with you. But I continued to have mixed feelings throughout the book. Sometimes I feel it delved too deep into navel-gazing, philosophical questions that slowed the narrative. At other times, I would suddenly read a sentence or a paragraph that shocked me with its pure, razor-sharp brilliance. I wanted to copy down these flashes of inspiration so that I would remember them. And then the book would slow again, for me anyway, and I would find it difficult to stay connected.
So what is my verdict? Well, I feel perhaps that this is a young and upcoming author who is still finding her voice and exploring the best way to confront the many questions she has about life. The novel is ambitious in its scope, as if Lim is using the story to navigate many different issues. I found it difficult to remain engaged throughout; but then, as I said, there were moments of focussed inspiration that stopped me in my tracks.
The story is about friendship and family, told from the perspectives of several characters. Nick has grown up with the advantage of white privilege. His best friend Andie, the daughter of Indo-Chinese refugees, is on a mission to change the world and fight poverty through the organisation for which she works, Real Difference. Andie’s husband Ben is white and their conflict about race and culture and class is a constant niggle to their relationship. Andie’s cousin, Tony, still only a teenager, is the focus of his parents’ high expectations, and finds his own path through radicalisation. I did find the delineation of the characters somewhat confusing at times, particularly towards the end of the book where we hear from more than one character’s perspective in the same chapter, sometimes changing from paragraph to paragraph. I’m not sure if this was deliberate on the part of the author, but if so, I’m not sure it worked – I found it a bit discombobulating.
But despite some criticisms of this book, I still kept reading. I did care about the characters and what happened to them. And as I noted, there were occasional flashes of brilliance – of observation or philosophical inquiry or thoughtfulness – that immediately switched me back on again.
And the messages or themes underpinning the narrative are compelling: an examination of racism and sexism, of cultural and gender issues, of the solace and the danger of radical religious beliefs, the divide between rich and poor, the argument of refugees versus economic migrants. Lim deftly depicts the insidious nature of sly racist comments that are not meant to hurt (‘because some of my best friends are Asian’) but that nevertheless cut to the quick. She states some uncomfortable truths and probes some pressures of traumatic family histories and upheavals. I suspect that for a particular audience, the characters and the family difficulties they face will resonate strongly. And the conclusion or climax is shocking and unexpected.
June 10, 2019
Real Differences is the debut novel of S.L. Lim, who was born in Singapore but came to Australia as an infant, and (as the blurb says) has spent a good part of her life toggling back and forth between the two places. Perhaps this bi-cultural experience is what enables her to cast a forensic eye on the illusions we have about Australian multiculturalism, social class and 'the fair go'...
Lim's characters occasionally stray into polemics when they are passionate about issues, but the issues they raise are real. At the same time, there is a strong focus on the feelings of the characters. The generation depicted in the novel spends a great deal of time thinking about things and analysing their own motivations, but they can be blind to flaws just like any generation. The narration shifts between Nick and an omniscient observer, and the intimacy of this technique enables the juxtaposition of all the characters' internal thoughts with subsequent dialogue. Towards the end of the novel, for example, we see an image of domestic harmony....
...but this episode is juxtaposed with dialogue that shows a marriage falling apart in rising conflict. The scene goes on to reveal that Ben, married to an Indo-Chinese character, is dismissive about casual racism at social events and can't understand why Andie arcs up because he doesn't confront it. Knowing that Tony's family had to flee Indonesia in the anti-Chinese riots in 1998, she wonders how loyal her husband and friends would be if they were confronted by guns and flaming torches, when they won't even stick up for her when someone tells a stupid joke that patronises people who are not White. And she realises that while there may be no such thing as colour in a mixed-race relationship such as hers, the price of it is her dignity because she is being given the status of an 'honorary White' instead of being valued as who she is.
This gulf between them is one of many situations in the novel that show characters interrogating the ethics of their behaviour.
To read the rest of my review please visit https://anzlitlovers.com/2019/06/11/r...
Lim's characters occasionally stray into polemics when they are passionate about issues, but the issues they raise are real. At the same time, there is a strong focus on the feelings of the characters. The generation depicted in the novel spends a great deal of time thinking about things and analysing their own motivations, but they can be blind to flaws just like any generation. The narration shifts between Nick and an omniscient observer, and the intimacy of this technique enables the juxtaposition of all the characters' internal thoughts with subsequent dialogue. Towards the end of the novel, for example, we see an image of domestic harmony....
Benjamin cooked breakfast for the two of them: eggs and tomatoes in a pan, buttered toast and coffee. It looked like breakfast in a cartoon about happy breakfasting. (p.240)
...but this episode is juxtaposed with dialogue that shows a marriage falling apart in rising conflict. The scene goes on to reveal that Ben, married to an Indo-Chinese character, is dismissive about casual racism at social events and can't understand why Andie arcs up because he doesn't confront it. Knowing that Tony's family had to flee Indonesia in the anti-Chinese riots in 1998, she wonders how loyal her husband and friends would be if they were confronted by guns and flaming torches, when they won't even stick up for her when someone tells a stupid joke that patronises people who are not White. And she realises that while there may be no such thing as colour in a mixed-race relationship such as hers, the price of it is her dignity because she is being given the status of an 'honorary White' instead of being valued as who she is.
This gulf between them is one of many situations in the novel that show characters interrogating the ethics of their behaviour.
To read the rest of my review please visit https://anzlitlovers.com/2019/06/11/r...
June 4, 2020
Firstly, let's be clear: Lim's critique of various subcultures, from public servants to consultants to tech-savvy do-gooders to clueless middle-class progressives to the overly intense to Islamic Student organisations is so spot on it is painful at times. Even selective schools get a look in "They were students at an elite Sydney high school - somebody told them they were the leaders of tomorrow about once a week. They sat there placidly, absorbing the praise and waiting for the speaker to move on to something more original." She is an acute observer, and if perhaps this can be harsh eye, it is the kind of harshness that is directed inward as well as outward. This book is really about the process of getting to adulthood and trying to work out how not to lose the passion and the sense of self along the way - and for that matter, why getting there matters at all. Lim raises important questions, and if the answers can seem mired in hopelessness, that perhaps is ok too.
The book is weighed down by flaws - the characters talk and think in speeches, even when polemicizing against speechifying, in a way that actually reminded me of Katherine Susannah Pritchard, but it also got exhausting after a while. They are also more successful as archetypes (as noted above, very sharply drawn archetypes) than as fully realised people. To build a compelling world that lasts over the 15 years the book covers, details could have used a bit more attention - the ages of characters progress at different rates, the eponymous company's business model makes little sense, most of the characters seem to make it to their mid-30s without anyone asking them if they are planning to have children, and perhaps most disconcertingly, technology and travel seem strangely static. It is as if the rich inner growth that drives the book takes place in a vacuum.
This is, however, to a large sense mediated by the love the book of ideas, even while sending up those who love them. The book is not afraid to show the kinds of lives my friends tend to lead - ones driven by this strange balance of indulgence and do-goodery (and yes, in a way that often can't distinguish between the two). Lim's characters want to be 'good people', even as they rapidly lose sight of what that might mean. The book never descends to the banal, or denies the characters values and reasons to engage.
I always prefer a flawed book with very strong strengths to something bland, and there was little bland here, and some passages that are absolutely worth the price of admission: "there had to be a place where encounters with the truth were possible. Where the sounds outside your head, other people’s lives, were granted just as much credence as the sounds within"
The book is weighed down by flaws - the characters talk and think in speeches, even when polemicizing against speechifying, in a way that actually reminded me of Katherine Susannah Pritchard, but it also got exhausting after a while. They are also more successful as archetypes (as noted above, very sharply drawn archetypes) than as fully realised people. To build a compelling world that lasts over the 15 years the book covers, details could have used a bit more attention - the ages of characters progress at different rates, the eponymous company's business model makes little sense, most of the characters seem to make it to their mid-30s without anyone asking them if they are planning to have children, and perhaps most disconcertingly, technology and travel seem strangely static. It is as if the rich inner growth that drives the book takes place in a vacuum.
This is, however, to a large sense mediated by the love the book of ideas, even while sending up those who love them. The book is not afraid to show the kinds of lives my friends tend to lead - ones driven by this strange balance of indulgence and do-goodery (and yes, in a way that often can't distinguish between the two). Lim's characters want to be 'good people', even as they rapidly lose sight of what that might mean. The book never descends to the banal, or denies the characters values and reasons to engage.
I always prefer a flawed book with very strong strengths to something bland, and there was little bland here, and some passages that are absolutely worth the price of admission: "there had to be a place where encounters with the truth were possible. Where the sounds outside your head, other people’s lives, were granted just as much credence as the sounds within"
July 17, 2023
This was not a happy book.
Ok, I knew it wasn't going to be an easy read to start with and while we were sort of told near the beginning a part of the ending then with all the foreshadowing, it was predictable; it was a crushing ending nonetheless. It just leaves me feeling utterly frustrated and helpless! Argh!
The book was primarily told from the perspective of Nick, "middle-class, clever and white", who's best friend, Andie is the daughter of Indo-Chinese refugee (anyone remember the '98 riots?). Andie, however, was born in Australia and while she is seen to have a very Western personality, inside she is quite torn between East and West. The story mostly revolves around Andie and readers do get perspectives from Andie and those around her. There were many valid points made about racism but, just like Andie, I wonder how far can you take these things? How do you work with unconscious bias?
Meantime, her cousin found his way to faith yet managed to fumble his way to destruction.
Again, NOT a happy book! I feel like immitating Andie in her rage and throw this at the wall.
Ok, I knew it wasn't going to be an easy read to start with and while we were sort of told near the beginning a part of the ending then with all the foreshadowing, it was predictable; it was a crushing ending nonetheless. It just leaves me feeling utterly frustrated and helpless! Argh!
The book was primarily told from the perspective of Nick, "middle-class, clever and white", who's best friend, Andie is the daughter of Indo-Chinese refugee (anyone remember the '98 riots?). Andie, however, was born in Australia and while she is seen to have a very Western personality, inside she is quite torn between East and West. The story mostly revolves around Andie and readers do get perspectives from Andie and those around her. There were many valid points made about racism but, just like Andie, I wonder how far can you take these things? How do you work with unconscious bias?
Meantime, her cousin found his way to faith yet managed to fumble his way to destruction.
Again, NOT a happy book! I feel like immitating Andie in her rage and throw this at the wall.
May 29, 2019
A fascinating debut which follows several young adults coming to maturity in Australia who variously face the challenges of racism, religious idealism and the intransigence of white privilege. A compelling story with a mystery at its centre Real Differences explores the challenges of living with and without a moral guide.
April 12, 2020
I wanted to like this one but I didn’t really find the characters believable enough. Others might disagree though.
September 16, 2020
Very well written. Types of love. Lives of young adults.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews