Modern Madness: An Owner's Manual

by Terri Cheney

Terri Cheney ripped the covers off her secret battle with bipolar disorder in her New York Times bestselling memoir, Manic. Now, in this "stigma-buster" and "must-read", she blends a gripping narrative with practical advice (Elyn Saks).



Cheney flips mental illness inside out, exposing the visceral story of the struggles, stigma, relationship dilemmas, treatments, and recovery techniques she and others have encountered. Sometimes humorous, sometimes harrowing, Modern Madness is the ultimate owner's manual on mental illness, breaking this complex subject down into readily understandable concepts like Instructions for Use, Troubleshooting, Maintenance, and Warranties.


Whether you have a diagnosis, love or work with someone who does, or are just trying to understand this emerging phenomenon of our times, Modern Madness is a courageous clarion call for acceptance, both personal and public. With her candid and riveting writing, Cheney delivers more than heartbreak; she promises hope.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Psychology, Mental Health, Self Help, Mental Illness, Biography

288 pages, Hardcover

First published September 8, 2020

About the author

After graduating Vassar College with honors, Ms. Cheney attended UCLA School of Law. After years of secretly struggling with manic depression, Ms. Cheney decided to leave the law and devote her advocacy skills toward a cause that is closer to her heart: writing about her illness, and encouraging the mentally ill to tell their own stories.

--from the author's website

Reviews

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

In her third articulate exceptionally written memoir, “Modern Madness: An Owner’s Manual” (2020) is written by Terri Cheney. From childhood on, Ms. Cheney has struggled with the affliction of having an SMI (Serious Mental Illness) of Bipolar Disorder. Also called Bipolar Depression, this illness is manifested by the cycles of extreme mood-swings that alternate between manic high’s and depressive low’s. Cheney is the author of “The Dark Side of Innocence: Growing Up Bipolar” (2011) and “Manic: A Memoir” (2009).

In the 1990’s Cheney worked in Beverly Hills as a high profile celebrity attorney that served Michael Jackson and Quincy Jones. While working on her cases Cheney stayed in the best posh hotels. One time she invited a handsome valet to join her for a drink at the hotel bar. As she waited for him, an airline pilot caught her eye, and she asked both men to join her for a nude swim on the beach! Another time she met a good friend for a lunch (who she hadn’t seen for years)-- and was so distressed by the placement of the tableware she could barely focus on their conversation. Cheney would go days without showering. Unable to get out of bed or change her clothes, her greasy hair stuck to her head, she could not bear the thought of the water cascading or touching her skin. These examples illustrated her SMI well, as were her descriptions of mental hospitalizations.

There are so many individual variables involving the spectrums and complexities of this illness. Cheney was initially misdiagnosed, which is quite common, this condition can be difficult to identify and find the right treatments that really work. Eventually Cheney joined two writing groups and discovered through years of trial and error the combinations of therapies that worked best for her. Cheney’s story is courageous and helps tremendously to understand this SMI that mental health experts believe affect as much as 5% of the global population. As we become more knowledgeable, it is also important to keep in mind that there is no known cure, and this illness can be fatal. ** With appreciation to Hachette via NetGalley for the DDC for the purpose of review.

[Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this book in exchange for an honest review.
I have read a lot of book on mental illness and this is definitely one of the best I've read about bipolar disorder. One of my closest friends is bipolar and she is very open and honest about her illness. This author is also open and honest about her illness. She covers all the ups and downs of bipolar disorder well. And the chapters on relationships are very useful.

[Mom_Loves_Reading · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is truly one of the best memoirs on mental illness that I have ever read! The unique layout of the book, easy to read, short chapters & the way it is written w/ insight, raw honesty, vulnerability & hopefulness, makes it absolutely riveting & thought-provoking!

We all know someone w/ a mental illness of some sort (I know several individuals) & this book helps to get a better understanding of what they go through on a daily basis. Cheney's writing style is self-deprecating & humorous one minute & heart-wrenching w/ truths the next. This is definitely a book that I will be sharing w/ loved ones that have someone in their life that is bipolar or struggling with other mental health issues.

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book had incredible insights. It was raw and honest. I found it incredibly relatable, a wonderful mix of memoir and mental health advocacy. It is very readable and has quickly moved to the top of my mental health recs.

I received an advanced copy in exchange for my review.

[Maria McGrath · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read a lot about this book (mostly in Shelf Awareness) so I jumped at the opportunity to get a copy from Net Galley. It has a few insights, and I hesitate to say this, because the author mentions this criticism being leveled at her often by people who just don't understand, but overall it seems self-indulgent. Most of all, it's a pale imitation of Kay Redfield Jamison's An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness. I know that this is a third go-round of writing about herself, so perhaps I would have done better with her first memoir, but the segments were so short (bite-sized and digestible) that they seemed unsubstantial. Another, I think superior memoir that touches on bipolar disorder is Hope Jahren's Lab Girl. It's probably good that people keep writing about and trying to remove the stigma from mental illness, and I think the author is most helpful when she describes how important medication has been for her, but I just couldn't connect.

[Jane · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to Hatchette for this ARC.

Not usually my type of book (nf) and especially about bipolar and mental illness but it was mostly written in layman's terms where I understood it and it wasn't as depressing as I thought it would be. She really went through hell (I didn't read Manic or her others) and has seem to have found happiness and a better understanding of her disease and overall mental illness itself. I also learned a lot about the difference between depression and bipolar also. I admit I did skip the "professional" chapters but maybe should have read them to get more understanding.

[theresa · Rating 5 out of 5]

loved the formatting of snippets that are a few pages long, feels so characteristic & symbolic & accessible. so much i could write about how healing it is to read something like this

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a wide-reaching, no-holds-barred memoir and help-book, all in one. Ms. Cheney writes in the voice of a good, wise friend, who arrived there by way of the School of Hard Knocks, thanks to her bipolar disorder, so skillfully chronicled here. Describing the adventures--some truly cringe-worthy--her mental illness has led her to throughout her adult life, the author can be, by turns, self-deprecatingly funny or heartbreakingly vulnerable. She exults in the creativity engendered by her sensitive condition, in its turn, as she passes along succinct advice and encouragement to others, including those who live with, love with, or work with someone who has similar challenges. This book is a very palatable means to get receptive readers "woke" about this very prevalent, yet misunderstood, condition.

[Julian · Rating 4 out of 5]

I feel bad for not liking this book very much, because in many ways my reasoning demonstrates the prejudice and stigma the mentally ill encounter. Some of the anecdotes were close to home and brought back negative feelings, and at the same time I got annoyed with the manic attitudes. If I cannot even stand to listen to this, would I be able to stand by a loved one suffering from mental illness? Experience suggests the answer is no. This is not good. I'm supposed to be a good person (?).

I could see someone I love in Cheney's memoirs and my heart ached. It made me think about how I've reacted to possibly manic incidents and how I didn't support my loved one. I will rethink this and try to be more understanding. This realisation is likely what Cheney wants, so here go the four stars.

Now, I didn't find Cheney to be a likeable narrator. I get that she suffers from depression, but that doesn't give her the right to belittle the concerns, fears and anxieties of the people she calls 'normies'. She wants understanding but only her battles are hard, others' just have minor inconveniences. She effectively lacks the empathy she advocates for. She has also chosen herself as the know it all. She knows when you're supposed to be quiet, when you can talk, and what exactly you have to say when people are manic. She extrapolates what works with her to everyone else.

Mixed feelings and I didn't even finish, but I still found value in the 80% I listened to.

[Nadia Sebaali · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Modern Madness" by Terri Cheney is a powerful exploration of life with bipolar disorder. The book vividly portrays the challenges individuals face, from the silent battles with anxiety to the daily victories of taking medication and practicing self-care. Cheney's honest presentation sheds light on the often-hidden struggles of those living with bipolar disorder, emphasizing their daily triumphs in facing internal demons. The author's bravery in sharing her experiences makes the book not only insightful but also an inspiring journey. After reading, I found a new level of understanding and hope, and I admire Cheney's courage, aspiring to mirror it in my own life.

[Dave · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a deeply personal accounting of someone navigating through bipolar that I think was insightful, informed, and will be very helpful to those that are struggling and those that love them. I would definitely recommend this to customers interested in books on mental instability and the knowledge of someone who appears to have worked through the steps and back slidings. Thank you to the publisher for making this drc available to me through edelweiss.

[Jacqueline Short · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautifully written book on mental illness. Digs deep into the highs and lows of the author’s life of living with bipolar disorder. This book helped normalize my feelings of depression and my recently new diagnosis of bipolar disorder, to a degree. At least now I know I’m not alone and maybe not as bad off as I feel. Going to check out her other books!

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thanks to Hachette Go for an advance copy for honest review.

Terri Cheney's new book, Modern Madness, speaks very frankly about the author's personal experiences living with bipolar disorder. TW: the book frequently discusses the author's thoughts and attempts of suicide. Cheney tells this story in short vignettes grouped in themes around things such as the presentations of bipolar disorder, stigmas, medications and coping skills, and more. It's an intense and personal look at one person's experience, and holds definite appeal for anyone looking to better understand the mind and life if someone living with bipolar disorder.

[S.G.Radonsky · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ms. Cheney discusses battle with bipolar disorder and how, most importantly, she deals with this disease for herself and opening up to 'others'. Her search for 'cures' and .good. doctors and explaining to others why certain behaviors raise their ugly heads I found most enlightening.

[Carolyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was described as "a gripping narrative with practical advice" but leans more on the narrative side.

[Anna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really wanted to love this. While the author did offer many interesting insights and examples of her own live living with bipolar disorder, I felt she was speaking for everyone who has the disorder too much. Like for example, 'never say this to a bipolar person,' 'this is what a bipolar person wants from you.' I felt she viewed her own standpoint as the correct one and I had trouble getting through it due to that reason. I do value the author sharing her own experience, I just wish it wasn't written in such a black and white tone. I am looking forward to reading her memoir, Manic. Hopefully that one is better suited for me.

[Robert Rotstein · Rating 5 out of 5]

This important collection of personal essays reads like a work of fine literature while tackling a most difficult issue—how to cope with mental illness. Honest, brave, and often humorous, MODERN MADNESS: AN OWNER’S MANUAL recounts Terri Cheney’s own struggles, in the process creating a narrative that is all at once informative, pragmatic, poetic, and in the end heroic. Five stars and a must read!

[Terry · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best memoirs I think I've ever read. Written in conversational tones, loaded with helpful info and suggestions, from someone who's been there, someone who knows of what she writes.
An amazing young author and an amazing book! Highly recommend!

[Laura · Rating 2 out of 5]

i, a poor bipolar with actual problems, don't have the patience to listen to a beautiful, successful white woman talk at length about having the audacity to eat plums in the grocery store and expect sympathy for it

[Cheryl Vickroy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Also found in a book share site and felt attracted to it. I have relatives (by marriage) who were diagnosed as bipolar (and some who may have other comorbidities).

How I wish I would have known about this book sooner! When I learned I'd married into a family with these challenges, I sought advice from others and read books and saw movies to help me understand the facets of this (and ADHD, mainly). I've also had students present with severe depression post Covid-19... and have felt helpless at times to comfort or console those around me.

I find Terri's book (subtitled subtlety 'An Owner's Manual) to offer the most pragmatically useful advice I've needed.

Terry is specific about aspects of bipolar, which I used to understand as an either/or. She taught me that disease is really a both/and. Terri shared her experiences (not TMI) and her hopes along with real practical advice ("Have your loved ones say these five little words: "Tell me where it hurts". "Then sit down and really listen.")

The chapter entitled the same (Tell Me Where it Hurts) goes on ..."Granted, it's not at easy option, but it's essential if you want to help. There's something surprisingly healing about spewing forth the poison that's been brewing inside, the avid corroding the soul. When darkness hits the light it can't help but evaporate a little bit, and sometimes that little bit can mean the difference between giving up and going on."

She says: "It's human nature to contradict someone when they tell you there are no options left." But she also let me know: "I love you and I want you to live" is a fine responsive to whatever you hear, not matter how many times you have to say it."

Those words are now engraved on my heart, should I need them again... Thank you, Terri.

[Shana Shroll · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book for the most part, but it was a little too fragmented for me. It’s intended to be a series of essays on living with bipolar disorder organized loosely as a user’s guide to a major home appliance might be, with sections titled “User
Precautions” and Maintenance”, etc. Clever, and possibly helpful if you’d like to just skim the book, or read in random spurts, picking out appealing topics as you go and leaving other bits behind.

Maybe the point was to be a little disconnected because bipolar disorder itself is all over the place, but I found the format hard to process. The timeline is not clear - she pulls from stories of her life over the past 20 years or so, but even that is just a guess, since she only mentions dates a few times throughout the book. I just had a hard time keeping up with her story.

The writing is very good, and it gave me a glimpse into the challenges and triumphs of living with a severe mental illness. But in some ways it was almost too well-written; it felt like someone’s very personal journal that had been taken apart and reorganized in a “use’s guide” format. I appreciate the work and struggle of the author and it was worthwhile but still tough to get through.

[Linda DiMeo Lowman · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are bipolar or have a loved one who is, this book is a must-read.

I use a kindle and I bookmarked so many pages that I've decided to buy the book and read it again so I can fold pages, underline passages and use the URLs she has in the book. The structure of the book is brilliant. The first section made me laugh many times. I nodded my head in agreement. The second section is the down section - she describes the hard part of having bipolar and the many struggles she has in the way she navigates the world. I cried several times. It's a damned hard thing operating in the world with bipolar. Throughout both sections, I related to everything she said and have experienced many of the things she's experienced. It felt so good to see myself reflected in a book. I feel less alone.
The remainder of the book focuses on practical advice for navigating relationships that are always fraught with the loss of those you care for. No one really can understand the deep depression and the mania, the mixed episodes and the very rare days of pure happiness untainted by the disease.

She's an accomplished writer so the book was a joy to read. I did not want it to end. Highly recommended.

[Chattynatty Van Waning · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks Hanchette Go for sending me this ARC to review. I was interested in the topic of bipolar disorder as some of my patients have this diagnosis. I thought it was a very well written book for both the reader with bipolar disorder, the healthcare provider to better understand this diagnosis, and for those family and friends who have a loved one with bipolar disorder.

There were so many great lines from this book. Here are a few of my favorite...
Pg 53- That’s the problem with happiness,I thought. It always makes us want more, and more is always out there, just out of reach. Hence addiction. Hence obsession. Would we suffer these maladies of desire if we hadn’t known the initial thrill of pleasure? I doubted it.

Pg 218 That’s when I realized that true joy isn’t a flood of bliss. It is, quite simply, a lack of drama.

I loved the author’s honesty, storytelling, with added education on the subject. I will definitely be reading her other works.

[Lia (_Lia_Reads_) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Billed as part memoir, part “user’s manual,” Cheney chronicles the everyday struggles of living with bipolar disorder. The book is broken up into different sections like “System Overview”, “Maintenance,” and “Troubleshooting,” that define the mental disorder and explore what it is like to live the different aspects of it. Within these sections, she presents anecdotes of her life, like what she has been told her manic stage is like, her struggles to find the right medication, how the disorder affects those around her etc.

While Cheney says the book is to help those who live with bipolar or who love someone who has it, I also found the book compelling in its portrayal of the everyday experience of bipolar disorder. It is heartbreaking to read what she has been through but simultaneously uplifting when you think about how far she has come. This is not Cheney’s first book on bipolar; Manic, her first memoir, was a NYT bestseller. Modern Madness is a very digestible look at mental illness and the way that those with a mental illness are treated in society.

TW galore but the biggest ones: attempted suicide; suicide ideation; vivid depictions of mania and major depression

Thanks to HachetteGo for the free advanced copy in exchange for an honest review!

[Kim Fox · Rating 4 out of 5]

Modern Madness by Terri Chaney is exactly what she says..an Owners Manual. The author is very upfront with her diagnosis of bipolar which at times is refreshing and at other times down right scary. And if it is scary to read about I can only imagine what it is like being bipolar. Her book details not only what she goes through but how you can help as well. And by help I mean what to say and what not to say, how to truly listen and observe and to learn from the cues that are always present. Man I wish I had this book 20 years ago!! I hope by having it now that I will be more empathetic in the future!! 4⭐
⭐
Thank you to Hachette Books and Terri Chaney for the advanced copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. ⭐

[Judith von Kirchbach · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bipolar disorder explained !

Terry Cheney‘s Modern Madness is, as Cheney says, an owner’s manual. Her mission, which she accomplishes beautifully, is to get under the hood of bipolar disorder: to demystify and reveal tools for coping. Information, after all, is power.

Throughout the book, Cheney provides a steady flow of anecdotally-driven descriptions related to hard-won skills for dealing with all phases of the bipolar disorder, and the art of how to confront the stigma of being “mentally ill.”

It was very interesting but a very hard read for me since I have experience having a close loved one with this disorder and it is so hard to watch and the book brought many of my memories into painful perspective.

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an excellent memoir about life with bipolar disorder. It kind of made me wish I'd read her first book, Manic, since I was interested to hear more about the nitty gritty of her darker times. The writing is strong here and extremely heartfelt. It was useful to get some of the clinical definitions, her own personal experiences with different types of treatment, insights on meds, and much more. I loved that the chapters were so short and digestible.

I'm not sure that the owner's manual format added much to my experience as a reader, though it was an interesting idea. Also, this did start to get repetitive by about 130 pages in. All in all, a great book for understanding bipolar disorder from one woman's perspective.

[Alexandra · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a memoir about Terri Cheney's experiences living with Bipolar Disorder. The book is written in the form of essays which are very informative and honest. I appreciate that Cheney tells us what it is like to live with Bipolar Disorder, and also how to behave with loved ones and friends who may suffer from it.

I have not read any of Cheney's other books, but they too appear to be about her life w/ BP.

If you have family or friends w/ this disorder and are seeking greater understanding I recommend this book.

Thank you Netgalley for an ARC in exchange for a free review.

[Ruth · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is Ms. Cheney's third memoir on her experience with bipolar disorder. Her first, Manic, was a New York Times bestseller and a wonderfully informative book as well as engrossing story that flowed well. Her next effort was a story of growing up bipolar, her examination of her childhood. This book is made up of short essays reflecting on various aspects of living with disease, as well as some new factual information. I didn't learn anything in this book that I didn't find out in her previous books. Much of the material was rehashed. The essay format did not work for me either.

[Angela Ruh · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this at the request of a friend looking for a book to give to family members seeking to understand her diagnosis of bipolar disorder and major depressive disorder. Unlike the author’s earlier book, Manic, this book offers the perfect balance of real-life examples of her bipolar struggles and explanations/definitions of typical mental health issues. I believe it could be endlessly helpful to those who have a loved one dealing with mental illness, but do not understand the experience themselves.