A quiet coffee shop gives two men who have lost too much a chance at love. Joe Calloway has been on the run since he was sixteen, homeless and alone. He never lets anyone close. Between his traumatic past and his autism, he isn’t used to people taking the time to understand him. Even so, when a stranger offers him a way to build a better life for himself, Joe finds the strength to go for it. Madden Fields is fully devoted to his older sister, her autistic son, and his job as a nurse, but when he meets Joe, his carefully ordered life begins to pick up speed. As their connection deepens, Madden realizes he’s going to have to hold on tight if he wants to be an anchor strong enough for Joe to stay. “Stay” is a 88,000 words gay hurt/comfort romance novel. Sensitivity There are some scenes where violence is depicted or remembered, some adult language, and consensual male/male sex scenes.
Beautiful, painful and erratic. I'm finding it a bit difficult to find the right words ... This is a very well written book about Joe, who is houseless and alone. He is on the spectrum, was abused as a child and has generally never experienced affection. Yes I shed quite a few tears.
Just when I think he’s going to give Bunny back, he rips his ears off and throws them at me. They bounce off my wet face and onto the floor. As I bend down, he rips off his legs, then chucks them at me, the body comes last. Once he’s finally turning to leave, I let out a sob. 😭🐰😭
well okay, quite a lot of tears …
don’t ever let yourself be vulnerable, physically or mentally. If you had to be alone, make sure you had somewhere to hide. 😢🥀😢
But Joe is also an incredibly strong character. Even though he comes across as immature in many scenes and reacts differently than you might expect due to his lack of experience, he is also a very powerful character.
“I’ve n-n-never liked it before. And it scares me because I can’t quantify the reason. But I trust that you won’t hurt me. And you need to know that I’ve never trusted a-a-anyone before. So, don’t hurt me. Please. While I think asking that is wrong, I need to.” 🥺💔🥺
He meets Madden, who has a deep need to take care of others. He is fascinated by Joe and desperately wants to help him, and is so incredibly careful.
All I could think about was that I wanted Joe, in whatever capacity I could get him. If it was just a friendship, it would kill me, and I’d probably end up old and alone, but I’d do that for him. What I wanted though, that was so hard for me to comprehend at this point. Because I’d never wanted anyone like I’d wanted him. I wanted him in my life, in my apartment, in my bed. I wanted to kiss him endlessly. To cook for him and come home to him and take him places he’d never been or seen. I wanted to know every single thing he liked, things that made him moan, things that turned him on, things that made him laugh. I wanted all of it with him, but I didn’t know where or how to start. This had to be on his timeline. And I would wait. 😍🫠😍
But Madden is also a little exhausting in his skittishness. Unfortunately, this is a point of criticism that I can't get over, which is why it didn't get five stars ... There are various scenes in which both approach each other cautiously and then one of them always withdraws in a blink of an eye. Then there are several similar communications as in the scene before, about how both of them first have to learn to understand the other and then the scene ends abruptly. Very exhausting ... And yes, I totally understand why these scenes are designed this way, but it just took me out every time and frustrated me to no end. I just don't understand why Madden's character has to be drawn so skittish, he should actually be much more at peace with himself. Maybe the intention was to show that Joe is actually the much stronger of the two, and yes it's all there, but somehow it didn't quite fit for me.
To end on a positive note, I was really impressed with the book overall and would love to read more from this author. I am incredibly grateful that it takes a long time for sex to happen between them, I would have totally understood if it had never happened. It's all very lovingly and really brilliantly done. And well worth the wait ... 🌶️🌶️🌶️
I designed the covers for this book, but am in no way biased because I hadn’t read the story until its release. I am, however, very proud to be one of the first people to read this debut because I sense great things from this author in the future.
Stay tells the emotional story of two men in their twenties meeting and falling deeply in love. Joe is the youngest and has challenges, a traumatic past as well as being on the autistic spectrum. Madden is older, and seemingly living a contented life, but when he meets Joe you see a latent desire to love and protect someone. It’s a touching setup for a romantic drama that is handled thoughtfully by Knight. Joe and Madden's relationship is as romantic as it is intense, and it's hard not to fall in love with these two beautiful characters.
The writing is very good. Knight possesses that innate ability of feeling into another person's emotions, and writers that have this, especially when they write in the first person narrative, portray characters whose desires keep you gripped to the page, whether you relate to their struggles or not. This is enhanced by a writing style that is succinct yet packs a punch:
"I watched his eyelids grow heavy, my hands in his hair, the sun spreading across his body like a blanket, his hair on fire from the light. He was perfection."
"Just when I had thought he was asleep, he said something to break my heart into a thousand pieces ..."
There are moments of humour, drama and passion in Stay. There is subject matter that might make you think. There is no convoluted plot, which some readers may not like; the focus is on romance, emotional conflict and the characters’ attraction to one another. But readers of intense m/m romance will get much out of this well written addition to the genre. Well done, Ash Knight.
From the first page to the last, the powerful emotions in Stay hit me right in the gut.
The level of care and sensitivity put into creating the characters that tell the story are beyond anything I've read in recent memory.
Joe has had a rough life and struggles daily in a world not conducive to his unique qualities. Madden, the ultimate caretaker, sees that elusive special something in Joe.
I enjoyed the slow and careful development of their relationship. It would have been a disservice to have it any other way.
Knight has managed to create rich characters that touched a tender part of me. I weeped, I cheered, I laughed, and I rejoiced. Stay is a story that will stay with me for a very long time. .
I'm struggling with rating this one a bit because I really enjoyed most of the last half of the book, but the first half wasn't working for me that well. I almost DNF around 50% because I wasn't FEELING the connection between the two MCs and I was like why am I still reading this. But I know a lot of others really loved this book so I stuck with it.
With the acknowledgement that the autism spectrum covers such a broad range of behaviors and thinking processes, at 42%, I'm honestly not convinced the author has ever actually interacted with an autistic person before. I keep getting the vague, uncomfortable feeling that perhaps Knight just really wanted to write hurt/comfort from a different angle, and wanted to address some sort of social disability, and did a bare minimum of research before striking on using autism. Maybe I'm wrong (and honestly, I hope so). But aside from having the autistic MC, Joe, tell the other MC, Madden, that being called "autistic" is derogatory, and that he should say "on the spectrum" instead - and though "on the spectrum" is generally acceptable, and there may be some debate about the preferred terms, "autistic" or "an autistic person" usually is too - Joe consistently keeps explaining to Madden what a literal person he his, and then virtually littering his speech and thoughts with metaphors, similies, and idioms. I find myself incredibly jarred by it each time. Though it's not unheard of for an autistic person to understand metaphors (even if they might struggle with complex ones), to say "I'm literal" and then repeatedly prove that untrue in the narrative is not only a bit offensive, but...not very good writing. I wish Knight had just picked one or the other.
I mean. I really *want* to give Knight the benefit of the doubt? I admit it's totally possible they or someone they love (or several people they love!) are on the spectrum, but...idk.
Additionally, Knight's thrown in this whole child sexual abuse storyline that genuinely doesn't fit the story, at least not the way it's been presented: formerly abused and now homeless autistic man makes eyes at Flawless Hero in coffee shop, and is confiding his trauma after barely more than two full conversations. Don't get me wrong, each person has the right to process their trauma however they want, and to trust whoever they'd like. But this feels like at some point Knight thought "what else can I do to make the readers feel sympathetic? And then how can I possibly make that plotline less realistic?" Because that's precisely what's happened. If the book was utilizing a soulmate trope, I might be able to suspend disbelief on how quickly this touch-averse autistic abuse survivor becomes emotionally intimate - and ohhh, really, really likes *his* touch! - with the caring nurse who's taken him home. But it's not and I, unfortunately, can't.
The writing itself isn't wholly bad, not filled with a bunch of grammatical errors or typos, and it's got a decent-enough flow. There's a bit too much exposition for my personal tastes, but a lot of people favor exposition, and it's something I've gotten used to reading; I can get around it. I might even have tried better with this, if I'd been able to stop curling my lip and rearing back every other page. I guess we're not in luck.
God, this all sounds so mean. And I hate writing unsatisfied reviews. But, frankly, I'm more than a little irritated. The reviews on this book were *stellar*, and I've had a rough day and really could have used a bit of softness. Sadly, I haven't found anything but the most superficial type of that here.
Awesome book! I loved everything about it! Sweet little twist at the end too! Definitely looking forward to more from this up and coming superstar mm romance author!
HOLY WOW, STAY is AMAZING! It’s the kind of book that keeps you up late at night and makes you forget the world outside the pages. I am extremely sleep-deprived because of it. I cried in Chapter 1, and I’m not a crier. THAT’s how good it is.
The first words hook your heartstrings and yank them through the expertly crafted story. With shades of CALL ME BY YOUR NAME, Knight makes you fall in love with Joe and Madden instantly, building intrigue and suspense with each passing page. Both of the main characters are gorgeously rendered with differing voices and personalities, fully realized and fleshed out, complete with layers upon layers of backstory and emotional depth.
Heart-wrenching at times, Knight balances humor, wit, and well-earned cheer to beautifully round out the story. It is perfectly paced with brilliant insight into the effects of autism, abuse, and PTSD on everyday functioning, and gives a much-needed voice to these communities. The author’s skill at character arcs is astounding. Joe and Madden leap off the page and into your heart as soon as you meet them, and they continue to STAY with you (per the title) long after you’re done reading.
Addictive and captivating, STAY is a must-read. I want to give Joe an enormous hug and protect Madden at all costs. A delicious love story with mountains of heart, I highly, HIGHLY recommend this PHENOMENAL novel.
A tender story of finding the way home, Stay takes the reader on a journey that spans a painful and abusive childhood through to finding safety in a loving relationship. It explores the need to be loved and the ability to trust with one's whole heart. Ash Knight's sensitive portrayal of her MC on the spectrum was artfully done. Each step along the way, Madden teaches us how to reach the heart and to gain trust from the one he loves. Knight leads us to fall in love with her characters as we root for them through the pitfalls of an incredibly complex relationship. She teaches us how to express love in a space where trust is not a given–where reading the signs and social cues cannot be taken for granted. Communication takes on an ever more significant role as two men learn to love on the spectrum. Tender and loving, hot and steamy, thrilling and suspenseful, Stay has it all. It's a beautifully written story of an unorthodox love.
New author with her debut story. Emotionally charged, I was quite impressed but I confess I thought the writing was a little clunky sometimes. It certainly could have benefited from a professional edit, which is an extra expense I know, but would have hopefully cut some of the more repetitive language. If you're anything like me, you will need tissues 😥...4 stars. 🌟🌟🌟🌟
The main characters, Joe and Madden, were fairly well-rounded, although I did think that Madden was a little stalker-ish to start with, and there was perhaps more than a little case of insta-love going on. I also felt that the original connection/meeting between the two MC's was a tad contrived unfortunately...don't blink, or you'll miss it. Adam was a good secondary character, but Madden's sister Anna was annoying and kept turning up unexpectedly...sometimes at very inappropriate moments. 🤯
Pierwsza część książki zdołowała mnie, ale była dobra, naprawdę dobra. Ale im dalej, tym bardziej moje zainteresowanie spadało. Zrobiło się słodko, a potem nagle bardzo dramatycznie.
Może ten spadek zainteresowania to wina Maddena - był tak idealny, cierpliwy, wyrozumiały - zbyt idealny i zbyt nierzeczywisty. Dodatkowo często o Joe wyrażał się "my boy" (bez żadnych podtekstów seksualnych), co mnie irytowało - Joe miał 22 lata przy 27 Maddena. Jasne, Joe w wielu aspektach był w pewien sposób niedoświadczony i niewinny, ale to wynik tego, że był w spektrum autyzmu. Zaś w wielu innych jego doświadczenie życiowe Maddena pozostawiało daleko w tyle...
Joe dla odmiany był świetną postacią, choć momentami miałam wrażenie, że autorka zapominała, z czym się mierzył w życiu. Było też kilka nieścisłości, jeżeli chodzi o wydarzenia z jego przeszłości...
Natomiast pomysł z ojcem Joe i jego kumplem-degeneratem był chybiony. Gdyby zostali tylko w przeszłości, byłoby wszystko w porządku. Natomiast ten wątek w teraźniejszości był mało realny, zwłaszcza znając środowisko, z którego się wywodzili i ich możliwości...
Pomimo tego nie żałuję, że poświęciłam czas tej historii - jasne, mogła być lepsza z mojego punktu widzenia, ale w końcu nie wszystko może być świetne czy wybitne 😉 W dodatku przecież każdy może sobie sam sprawdzić - bo może się czepiam? 😉
Joe, the homeless, touch-adverse boy with the stutter and on the autism spectrum and Madden, "always the nice guy".
Joe's character is written so inconsistently. And of course, the touch-adverse Joe is not only not adverse to Madden's magic touch, but he also has a tattoo on his chest. Joe lecturing Madden's sister on calling her son autistic and saying she should say he is on the spectrum was odd... if you asked 100 different people who are on the spectrum how they choose to refer to themselves, you'd get a lot of different answers.
Madden rubs me the wrong way. The fact that he grabbed Joe by the wrist at their first encounter bothered me, and the fact that he continually just grabbed at him after seeing how he reacted to that initial touch didn't help. And when Joe described him as "always the nice guy", I just thought of those guys who always tell you how nice they are and they really aren't. I just find that Madden is really pushy towards Joe.
Madden's sister, the mother of an autistic child, doesn't think her brother should get involved with Joe, because he is on the spectrum, because look at how much work her son is.
The editing could use some work. There are some sentences that just aren't grammatically right. There are continuity issues. Bird recounts at age 12 his father letting one of his friends up into his room and that it wasn't the first time, but then he tells Madden that his father waited until he was 14 before he let his friends do anything.
I also just don't really like the writing. It doesn't click for me.
What an incredible, heart-wrenching, yet empowering story! Author Ash Knight shines the light on some difficult subject matter such as childhood abuse and complexities of relationships. I was completely captivated by the main characters Joe and Madden and their journey to finding love, acceptance, trust, and safety. This is a beautiful well-written story that’s uplifting and educational. I recommend everyone read this book, it will ignite your heart and fuel your emotions. I can’t wait to read more books from Ash Knight!!
Despite slightly slower pace I enjoyed this hurt/comfort angsty romance. The MCs were likable and easy to relate, the little twist in the end brought the story to a nice conclusion and the amount of emotional pain was just right. It's is said you met a person with autism, you have met ONE person with autism. Yes, there is a set of common traits that people with autism have, but all of them are also unique in their own way. Joe's ability to cope on his own, to persevere despite circumstances made him such a strong character and I loved when he finally learned to trust Madden and let go. That made him even stronger. Madden was a natural born caretaker, and I loved his understanding, patience and compassion. Both men suited each other well, had wonderful chemistry and had ample chance to fall in love as well as in lust.
The hard subjects of abuse and neglect were seamlessly written into present day events and helped understand where Joe came from, what drove him to push and how far he has come on his own. The connection he shared with Madden was further cemented by him trying to communicate even when it was hard, and Madden was there patiently waiting for him and ready to catch Joe should he stumble. I loved the sweet and tender moments as well as when the author brought the heat between them. It was good story full of hurt/comfort, angst, medium amount of steam and told from dual POV. I enjoyed it. Copy received for my honest and unbiased review
There is a lot packed into this beautiful novel. It takes on complicated topics like mental illness, abuse, autism, and homelessness, while telling a story of a sweet romantic relationship between two incredible men.
This is a slow burn romance story that builds into a raging bonfire. I felt every emotion as I read and I stayed engaged the entire time.
I love the way Ash Night gives the characters realistic emotions and they learn to navigate those emotions together. Madden is so sweet and tender and his relationship with Joe melted my heart. I can personally relate to many things in this book, which is likely part of the reason I enjoyed it so much.
I loved everything about this book and I'll be damned if it's not just about the sweetest love story I have read.
What an awesome story!!! I started it at 11 PM one night, and could not put it down! I had to when my clock showed 4 AM and I still wasn't finished reading it, lol! But after some sleep, I was able to finish. I cried at the end! This one is staying in my collection! I LOVED the characters Joe and Madden! A must read!!!
Ash Knight is a very capable writer and I am certain many will love the story. However, as romances go, the age-old formula was adhered to and the narrative was sadly predictable.
This book, while probably as far from my normal reads as can be, is excellent. From the first words in the first chapter, where powerful emotion swept me with it, I knew this book was something special. The mark of an excellent book and fantastic writing – that the story, regardless of one’s own world views and experiences, genre preferences, and yes, even sexuality, can touch you on a very humane level.
Madden and Joe are two well developed characters and I enjoyed the slow, gradual progress of their relationship. I enjoyed my time spent within the pages of this book – I pitied, felt sad, laughed, felt happy. Lived a life with these characters and their stories. I shall remember for a long time the powerful emotions from the get-go.
Complicated emotions and issues, like abuse, homelessness, autism; etc. Yet the story has a lot of heart.
Very much recommend this read! Read it, really. It’s bound to affect you. It’s great.
This is a beautiful love story. The common themes of courtship hit close to home in STAY. My wife and I read this together and she reminded me how hard a time I gave her opening myself to being in a committed relationship after so many failures and romantic hardships. I remember being perfectly fine by myself. She remembers thinking I used a solitary mindset as a shield against future heartache. I guess we weren't far off from the protagonist in STAY. The fact that we're parents to beautiful children with autism added a deeper connection for us with this book. Ash Knight is a talented writer who I believe can transcend genres through her ability to perfectly echo the raw emotions we're ALL capable of. I don't like giving spoilers or plots in my reviews. I believe readers should be free to discover those for themselves in the reading, and enjoy the journey just as I do. What I will say is, even if you're not in the LGBTQ Community, you will find profound beauty and emotional commonality with Ash Knight's STAY.
Madden helps Joe and together they find love. Ash Knight is an amazing author. This story takes hard subjects an addresses them with Grace and style. I found that the romance was a gentle thing that is needed by so many today. I found myself drawn to both Madden and Joe.
I have to be honest, I'm not entirely sure how to rate this book. There were moments where I was like, "oh my god, I love this!" But then there were moments where I was like, "hmm, not loving this as much as I thought I did."
So, let's get into it.
This is Ash Knight's first novel. Really good for a first published story. There were some editorial errors, but not too many. Ash clearly has the talent to write.
I was really disappointed, though, at her narration type style that she fell into at times. And it was the important times too! Like when Joe or Madden were sharing a vital part of their past and instead of seeing the conversation take place, we're just told what the MC communicated to the other person. So, we're not necessarily missing out on info here, but we're missing out on "seeing" the important conversation happen. I'm all about conversations. I LOVE them. I want to see the back and back between them. I want to read the quotes of them talking. I don't want you to tell me about it.
So, yeah, I was disappointed at those parts.
Madden was AMAZING! He is definitely one of my favorite heroes. He was sweet, patient, kind, loving, gentle, understanding...seriously a dream guy. 💕 And he's gorgeous.
Yes, Ash gives us the physical description of the MCs. 🙌
Joe. Okay. Can I just say I had an issue with his name throughout the entire story? Joe. 😕 It just didn't feel like the right name for him. At all. We have a sexy name like Madden, and then we have...Joe. 😒 Just didn't mesh for me. Joe himself, though, was a sweetheart.
I wasn't a fan of the near constant stop and go with their physical relationship. Maybe that was an attempt to make the story more realistic, but I don't read for realistic. I read for incredible romance that we all know isn't real. I mean, that's okay to say, right? We know these stories aren't real life, right? But I don't care. I love fiction.
Anyways, so I just wanted them to get on with it when it came to their physical relationship. But that's probably just a pet peeve of mine. Just an opinion.
It's a long story, but it did keep me interested. There were times where my heart was beating wildly and I had to slow my breathing. I almost couldn't read fast enough to see what would happen.
The way Joe and Madden love each is INCREDIBLE. I just love that part. It really was a beautiful story, but needed a bit more. The things I mentioned above about the conversations and letting us see those. Also, Joe's past is REALLY horrific. I almost feel like Madden doesn't realize how much so. But it's not his fault (because I adore Madden and can find no wrong with him). No, its just the way it was written. I'm not sure if it's because Joe didn't tell him exactly how horrible it was, or if the author just didn't convey to the reader well enough that Madden knows and is compassionate about it. I'm referring to the sexual abuse. It's not mentioned in Madden's thoughts, that I recall. I would think that would be something that would crush him considering how much he loves Joe. Maybe I just really really like super alpha men.
But again, Madden is P-E-R-F-E-C-T.
And the epilogue left me wanting more 🙁 I wanted to know what Joe decided to do with his life. I would have loved the epilogue to have been set a few years in the future.
All in all it was a good read. I would definitely recommend for others to read. I really am unsure what star to give it. The things I listed above are big deals to me. It was a great story but was missing "something". I'm not exactly sure what. I think it could just a bit more skill in relating such a tragic, yet beautiful story to the reader.
So, I'm giving this a 3 star. Because I'm a hard ass when it comes to giving stars.
BUT MADDEN ALONE IS A 5 STAR. I seriously have a crush on him😍
This book is quite special. It is not only a riveting, and touching, love story, it also offers a quite remarkable and superbly written insight into life on the autistic spectrum.
Joe is on the spectrum, as well as having gone through a harrowing life before he meets Madden, a nurse who proves himself to be utterly selfless and understanding.
'Stay' is the story of their relationship, how it develops, and the obstacles and challenges they overcome.
It made me laugh, it made me cry, and it made me feel a depth of emotion I honestly wasn't expecting.
Just brilliant.
Definitely one for an adult readers who don't mind explicit scenes, though.
This is a new to me author, and for a first novel this was a beautiful story. Wow. Beautiful. The journey was heart breaking, but once they found each other it was simply perfect. Gosh these two. What an amazing couple. Loving each other for exactly the person they are. . The writing was great, the story was amazing, and the love, gosh the love was everything. The ending was a little ehh but overall just beautiful. Hoping we get stories about two others I’ll keep my eye out
A bit haunting, and definitely captivating, “Stay” is one of those stories that settled in my bones and will most certainly stick around for a while. The characters are very well crafted and make you fall in love with them. The story itself opened my eyes to considering things from different perspectives in an area where I have no knowledge. Thoughtful and romantic are two words that rise to the top when I reflect on this book and I hope others can see the beauty in its difference.
Stay is described as a hurt/comfort romance novel, and while I wasn’t entirely sure what that meant, after reading the novel, it really is a perfect description.
The two main characters are Joe and Madden. Joe is shy, withdrawn, and has a broken past, whereas Madden is confident, charming and well established, and he falls for Joe at first sight despite Joe’s obvious reluctance to allow anyone close to him.
The main plot revolves around Madden trying to break through Joe’s past trauma, and Joe learning to accept being loved unconditionally. It sounds straightforward, yet cleverly interweaved into the story are encounters with Joe’s past and Madden’s family that keep causing bumps in their growing relationship. I found the disruptions to their lives to be the most entertaining parts of the novel and would have enjoyed even more of them. There is a lot of amusing sexual tension that builds up, which I found entertaining, particularly when seen through Madden’s perspective.
I feel it’s important to mention that there are some graphic sex scenes which are very well written, but if that’s not your thing, you might want to look elsewhere.
I was extremely impressed with the quality of writing. It was flawless. The two main characters are extraordinarily believable and I had such a clear vision of them in my head as I read the novel. Every scene is strong, whether they are current day or from Joe’s childhood.
Over-all, I found Stay to be an easy five star read due to the quality of writing and the strong main characters.