Harlot's Sauce: A Memoir of Food, Family, Love, Loss, and Greece

by Patricia V. Davis

When Patricia, "the naïve American" meets Gregori, "the gorgeous Greek", her Sicilian-born father takes spectacularly extreme measures to try to stop her from marrying him. This is just one of many wrong reasons why Patricia is all the more determined to do so. She even moves with Gregori to Greece, where he insists he must be in order to be happy. Once there, she discovers that though she might not save her marriage, she just might save herself. With vivid descriptions of life in beautiful, modern-day Greece, this memoir is both a tasty treat and an exhilarating sail on the Hellenic seas through xenophobia, dysfunctional family units, religious ravings, obsessive protocols, political disorder, European football, and fabulous food. As the Italians say, Buon Appetito! (Good Appetite!) As the Greeks say, Kalo Taxidi! (Good Voyage!)

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Travel, Food, Biography Memoir

276 pages, Paperback

First published November 8, 2008

About the author

PATRICIA V. DAVIS's SECRET SPICE CAFE TRILOGY is a magical realism/paranormal mystery series set aboard the historic RMS Queen Mary. Research for these novels took her far and wide, from meeting with a genuine voodoo priestess to chatting with the world's greatest magician, David Copperfield. The trilogy is available in paperback, eBook, audiobook, and library hardback. Her first feature film, LYVIA'S HOUSE, a 'Twin-Peaks-meets-Get-Out' psychological thriller was released in 2024. Patricia lives with her poker player/rice farmer husband. They divide their time between southern Nevada and northern California. Represented by Gordon Warnock at FUSE LITERARY.

Reviews

[Breacis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this book! Not only b/c it was written by my 6th grade teacher and friend but because it shows life's ups & downs. I was able to relate the experiences in the book to my own life. I’m so proud of her and recommend this book to anyone who wants a good taste of food, family, Love, Loss and Greece.

[Lauren Hidden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Too many memoirs have a very self-indulgent feel to them--a very "woe is me" tone. Harlot's Sauce is not one of them. It is well-written, easy to read, and has a knack for sinking you into the physical setting of where the story is taking place--from New York to Greece. In addition to being entertained, I felt like I got a taste of Greek life beyond what you experience at a local Greek festival!

I especially liked the explanation in the beginning of the book of a "hyphen-American." Though I've known people who fit that category, it was always a perplexing phenomenon to me until now! It's also an important precursor to understanding some of the motivations of the central "characters" in the book.

The "Explanations and Apologies" chapter at the end of the book (similar to an epilogue) expressed candor unlike what I've seen before and also answered one of my troubling questions that stayed on my mind as I read the book: How did Nick feel about how his father and other relatives were portrayed? At times I wondered if truth or anger was influencing how the characters came across. The flip side of that is that this book didn't feel whitewashed for fear of angering people!

Patricia moved from being rather dependent to rather independent, and I was impressed to see her inner strength emerge through her various trials. I wonder how Patricia is doing now, how her second marriage is different from her first, and where her career took her after returning to the U.S. I'd also like to know how Nick fared as an adult, after his somewhat non-traditional childhood. I hope there will be a sequel.

This is definitely worth the read! I finished it in two days.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

My biggest pet peeve with some memoirs is that the authors don't reveal their true selves. What's the point of writing about a major struggle in life if you don't open up? Well, Patricia Volonakis Davis doesn't disappoint. From the beginning, she weaves her background as a first generation Hyphen-Something-American with her courtship and later marriage to a Greek immigrant, always incorporating her feelings into the events playing out in her life. Where most people would have given up, she endures, putting her marriage and son above her own happiness. While her experiences with her in-laws and in Greece would have driven anyone crazy, she manages to shed a humorous light on these events, making the most of life. I particularly admire her determination to succeed in Greece, after she moves there with her husband and son, leaving a job, her family, and close friends behind in the US. I won this book in a Good Reads monthly giveaway and was interested in its cross-cultural relationship nature. I didn't know much about Greece and its recent political and social events. I feel like Volonakis Davis wove those aspects into her memoir nicely. I certainly walked away with a great understanding of Greece: its culture, history, and family life.

[Colleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This wonderful memoir justifies the expression "don't judge a book by it's cover". Though released through a small press, Davis' book is as professionally written (if not formatted) as any I've ever read. Witty and self-deprecrating, Davis takes us through two decades of life as an Italian-American woman married to a Greek for all the wrong reasons. Though her naivete is sometimes painful, Davis is ruthlessly honest about the mistakes she made and why she made them. Readers will admire her determination to make her marriage work- she did after all move halfway around the world to try to find happiness for her family!

As an Irish-American, I could appreciate many of the facets of growing up a "Hyphen" (especially the Catholic guilt!), and think this memoir will speak to anyone who appreciated My Big Fat Greek Wedding. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and plan to pass it along to friends. My only quibble is that the ending felt rushed after all the buildup- I would have liked an additional chapter to cover "where is she now". All in all a highly recommended 4 stars.

[Deb Mj · Rating 3 out of 5]

Where should I begin? I won this as a First Reads giveaway and really looked forward to reading it. It started out so well and I was very encouraged. Unfortunately, it turned into almost a non-stop whinefest. I appreciated the author's challenges and her desire to hold her family together. I was alternately impressed and repulsed by her willingness to lose her identity to achieve that goal. I was glad to see her overcome everything and gain her independence, but all I could say to myself was, "it's about time!"

On an unrelated note, two little criticisms: I found at least three obvious errata which should have been picked up in editing. Additionally, while the title of the book indicates that it's a memoir of Food, I saw very little in the way of attention to food. That was actually the part of the title that drew me in to enter the First Reads giveaway, and I was disappointed to find so little attention given to it.

[Tina Culbertson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Italian-American girl Patricia meets Gregori, “the gorgeous Greek” as she refers to him, and details their cross cultural romance in Harlot’s Sauce: A Memoir of Food, Family, Love, Loss, and Greece.

This book tells a story you can see unfold in your mind. The picturesque scenery and family life in Greece, the leading lady’s unfortunate experience with Greek liquor, to Gregori’s obstinate behavior toward his fiancé …it’s a good read. Even as her marriage falters Patricia moves forward positively and writes with humor. Full of food, passion and engaging stories – please read this cross cultural journey.

Full review plus a pastitsio is here:
http://novelmeals.wordpress.com/2012/... -love-loss-and-greece-by-patricia-volonakis-davis/

[Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author tells a great story about growing up in an Italian-American household and then marrying her Greek husband and the melding (or not!) of their two cultures.

I couldn’t help but wonder throughout her story what the other side would sound like, either from her parents or her husband Gregori. I’m sure they would offer an entirely different perspective.

I also wonder if they had a proofreader for this book. If they did, he/she should be fired. The typographical and grammatical errors were numerous and became annoying for me.

Patricia’s story was very interesting. I’d like to read about what happened where this book left off.

[L. Virelli · Rating 4 out of 5]

Being an Italian-American woman myself, I related to and laughed about the similarities. I enjoyed most of the story, but had a little trouble relating to when she lived and Greece. Probably because the culture was so foreign to what I'm used to here in the U.S. I always wanted to write about my own Italian family, and her book motivated me to get it down on paper and finally published for e-books. It's a memoir anthology of four short stories. If you liked Patricia's, you may enjoy the food story and trip to Italy in Rome, Home and Meatballs!
http://www.amazon.com/Rome-Home-and-M...

[Laura McHale Holland · Rating 5 out of 5]

Luckily I started reading this book on a weekend I'd set aisde primarily for rest and noodling around the house. I was drawn in so effectively by the author's voice I didn't want to put the book down. I managed to get some things done around the house and get some exercise in, etc., but reading this book was the primary activity of the weekend, and I'm glad it was. This woman's mettle was tested in a difficult relationship in a foreign land, and she didn't just survive or get by, she thrived. In this saga, Patricia V. Davis endearingly conveys her flaws along with her strengths, making her a reliable narrator—and her resourcefulness is truly inspiring.

[Carmen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book when I read it a few years ago. I love it now more for one simple reason... it is so well written and the story is so engaging that I found it memorable. And these days for something to stick with me between all the movies, TV, YouTube, and Facebook input that I consume... that means this book was great. not little-g-great but rather Great. I have used the recipe as inspiration many times. Read this book. Give it to all your friends who are married to jerks and it will inspire them to make a better life for themselves, just as it inspired me. In fact, I found this book inspirational as a business person as well. Great book, well worth your time!

[Linda C. · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I were to describe Patricia in one word it would be: determined. Patricia has a determination to succeed in whatever she attempts. This story shows how determined she was to make her marriage work, even though ultimately it didn't.

The choice for "Harlot's Sauce" in the title wasn't clear at first, but as you read the story you realize it was her life's attempt on making something delicious out of limited ingedients.

She uses humor to great effect in describing what must have been heartrending to experience at the time. A powerful story written by an equally powerful woman.

[Diane Nagatomo · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book to be interesting--not only because it depicts the struggles of another foreign wife--but because it also brought back a lot of memories of when I was a foreign exchange student in Greece in the 70s. Greece in 1974 was much more exotic and conservative than Japan in 1973. I was dying to go back to Japan, but never had that urge to go back to Greece--at least not the ultra conservative part I was in.

[Amber · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a fantastic book. Well written, funny, and touching. The book is a true memoir of Patricia's life. You follow her through her first big romance, her life, love, and lessons in between. This is a book every woman can relate to. Its a story of growing up, empowerment, and finding your own voice. Amazing. Highly recommend!!

[Trish · Rating 4 out of 5]

i am mad... I lost this book-I am in the middle of it, and now I cannot find it... I giving myself one more day, then i start a different one. Michael smirchonish is at chester county bookstore tonight promoting his new book. That is on my list... I have finished the book-it definitely is worth reading. The ending is much better. If you have any Greek friend, this will be well-appreciated!

[MrsPeel · Rating 5 out of 5]

no woman should left this book unread, a funny, though dramatic at times, account of a woman's fight for life and the amazing discovery of the brilliancy one can find in the path, I got to taste the food, see NYC and Greece without leaving my bed....
couldn't put it down, marvelous.

[Debra · Rating 2 out of 5]

There was so much angst and drama in the first half of the book—she tries to please her Italian American parents, tries to figure out what it means to be an Italian-American and then moves on to trying to please (and re-please) her husband.

When does she please herself? She thought she had found a kindred spirit, someone who understood her “other-American” self in her Greek-American husband, Gregori.

Boy, was she mistaken.

There were definitely clues that this match was doomed from the beginning.

Her best friend Donna’s comment (“How can you think of getting serious with a man who dictates what you should wear, how much you should drink, what you’re going to do on your first vacation together and where and how you make love?”)

Her dad’s categorical dislike for Gregori.

Her feelings of being the alpi among his family.

It took her so long to find her way to happiness, but she finally made it.

There was some humor amongst the struggles:
*Patricia’s description of her encounter with flying Greek cockroaches.
*The grandmothers’ first meeting, both outraged at what the other was wearing (one in traditional black, the other in a bit more flamboyant outfit).
*The best man’s “Drag Queen” like tastes when picking out his special wedding charges.
*Her description of how she makes garlic bread to her Greek in-laws and misusing Greek words. (Apparently the Greek words for bread and a vulgarism for the male anatomy are quite similar.)

Thank goodness there was this humor and Patricia’s ultimate personal and business triumphs in Greece. I was rooting for her all the time but I did want to slap some sense into her at times.

[Ali O'Hara · Rating 2 out of 5]

Hmm.. this was not what I was expecting at all. I was expecting a light, funny memoir of living in Greece. What I got was a pretty detailed analysis of marrying for the wrong reasons and struggling through that. Oddly it was more of what I was looking for in 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

While it wasn't what I was expecting, and not as light and fun as I'd hoped, consider that rating 3.5 stars. It was still interesting (hey, I finished it even), and I thought it had a lot of good points to ponder on marriage, and even just life overall.

[Cathy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really enjoye the first half or so of this book, when Davis talked about how she was raised and her courtship with her handsome Greek husband. The latter parts, when their marriage is falling apart, felt more like score-settling to me -- she just basically writes about what a jerk he was to her, without being able to (or maybe just interested in) make his point of view or motivations clear. He wouldn't make the salad! He was bad in bed! He let his mother boss him around! It's good fodder for marriage counseling, but not so much for a memoir.

The early parts of the book, though, are very good -- Davis is very funny and has a great perspective on the "kid of immigrants" perspective.

[Lynn Cook Henriksen · Rating 3 out of 5]

You'll love and identify with Patricia's insights, in retrospect, on life, love, cultures, friendships, conscious mothering, running a usiness in an adopted country, wifely duties, and a domineering mother-in-law, generously spiced with wretched dogs (and their owners), flying cockroaches, baseball bats, harlot's sauce, and a no-account woman who smells bad. As she cavorts through a couple decades, often laughing at herself, you see innocence retreat and a strong, self-reliant woman come into full bloom, holding no grudges and willing to share herself and the sauce with all of us.

[Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

The voice in this memoir is good/interesting, but b/c she stays in a *terrible* marriage for years, its a frustrating read. In addition, she reveals a lot about Greek men, but not so much about Greek culture. I thought I could use this for the travel writing course I am teaching in Greece, but the writer was trying very hard not to blame anyone (except herself) for staying in the loveless marriage and to be *funny* that it all ended up feeling a little forced to me.

[Deborah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Patricia and Gregori meet and marry despite the odds against them. They clash, their families clash. She uproots her life and their child to move to Greece since Gregori wants to be there. Despite it all, she does well for her and her son.
Some day I will have to try the recipe for Harlot's Sauce.

[Mary Lang · Rating 3 out of 5]

Patricia is an Italian American who falls in love with Gregorio who is Greek. He is stubborn, selfish and will never be happy. She gives in to him most of the time, she works hard at her marriage, even harder once they have a child together. It takes her a long time to realize the marriage is not good. She does go to Greece and adapts very well. The book is well written and humorous.

[Kris · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author talks about the great things about Greece: the culture, the food, but most of the book is grousing about her ex husband and his family. It is a historical review of their relationship and eventual divorce. The chauvinist Gregori and his very difficult mother are expecially well portrayed. The writing intermittently was difficult to read, but overall an interesting memoir.

[Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

I heard Patricia Davis speak at a writing convention and was excited to read her memoir, especially as I was working on mine. It was a fun read, but not a book I'd recommend to my friends. It's a light-hearted look at a woman trying to make her way into the Greek culture, sometimes successfully. She writes with humor, which helps a lot.

[Taweewat · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very fun and personal story about a girl to live with Greek husband and had to learn their culture/history. The story is very personal and touching. There are some funny moments to make the story lighthearted enough to be a good afternoon read. The story also reflects a lot about family-valued and how a person can deal with it in a very real way.

[Thomas Forsythe · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overall I would say this book is very well written, but the portion of the author's life I seemed most interested in seems to get fast forwarded and wrapped up in the last twenty pages of the book.

[Alison]

On my Kindle

[Deb · Rating 3 out of 5]

For Cook the Books--here is my review and a recipe for Ouzo Sorbet (yum!) inspired by the book: http://kahakaikitchen.blogspot.com/20...

[Louna Coumeri · Rating 5 out of 5]

A brilliant story of pain, maturity and ultimate triumph! Not to be missed!

Harlot's Sauce is a magnificent, brutally honest, fun as well as sad memoir of a woman, Patricia with whom I now know we led parallel lives in the same city at the same time only a few kilometers away from each other, though we may as well have been best friends. Because I know that if we had met during the 7 years we simultaneously lived in Athens, nothing could have kept us apart. Patricia's story is my story without the marriage. Everything from her life in New York to the day she returned to the States, her cultural and religious tensions, her self doubt and ultimate personal triumph are all things I have experienced and know. As far as the writing is concerned, it is flawless. Her storytelling abilities and talent make it impossible to put the book down, needing to know what happens next and how she realizes her potential as a woman, mother and literary professional. Patricia is undoubtedly quite an accomplished artist both in her writing painting and now as a screenwriter. A brilliant book any .....-American can identify with. I highly recommend it to all women!

[Dyana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Patricia V. Davis's Memoir shared her struggles as an independent woman trying to become a good wife. But her sacrifices to become a good wife, never seemed to be enough. The entertaining differences of her Italian American family and her husband's Greek family, gave me insight into how different types of cultures have problems when entering into marriage, and the struggle to maintain that marriage. Greece was a place that I got to know more about through her vivid descriptions. Comparisons to places I've lived - pulled me into understanding some of the hardships she had to endure. This is a story told with humor, that will make you laugh out loud and other times sadden your heart. I enjoyed it very much.