I'm a biased reader. I'm a hypocrite. I'm probably just a terrible person overall. I'm sitting here, looking back at the first time I picked up Artemis Fowl, remembering how much I didn't love it at first. I remember adoring The Arctic Incident, and feeling slightly less partial to The Eternity Code. I applauded The Opal Deception, but The Lost Colony made my head hurt a bit, and The Time Paradox was stunning. The Atlantis Complex fell out with the rest of the series, and, here we are with The Last Guardian, at the ending - or, perhaps, the beginning - of all things.
I look back at this book and all the books that came before it, and I can't help loving them, rather like one can't help loving that one crazy and neurotic person in one's life. The series jumped around, hitting high points and low points, starting plot threads, forgetting characters, promising some directions and then reneging on those promises. Yes, we never find out what happened to Minerva. Yah, I shipped Arty-Holly in vain. But through and through, The Last Guardian was another marvelous adventure, as nerdy and as outrageous as Artemis Fowl ever gets.
Once a series goes past four books, forget about stability. (The only books ever to work around this were the Harry Potter ones, but they had all been planned ahead.) So I'm prepared to forgive the lack of coordination. Artemis Fowl has a tendency to ignore simple physical constraints, like time and dimension; can we expect meek adventures from him?
No, we cannot. And I think what has stayed constant throughout the books were the heroes themselves. Artemis, Holly, Butler, Mulch, Foaly - wherever they're off to next, we know they'll surely have each other's backs. In this final installment, those who made up the heart of the series were not forgotten. They each made grandiose entrances and spectacular rescues, all without losing that snarky, geeky touch.
These books were written to be fun. Heck, Eoin Colfer had more fun writing them than we probably did reading. (And that's saying a lot.) They're action-driven, spattered with sharp asides, and are stuffed with fictitious quantum physics theories. And younger literature has become so gloomy these days, what with drippy teenage romances and things. It's always great to spend a couple of hours thwarting megalomaniac pixies. We can't read heavy college class lit books all day, everyday: and it is in this - in the easy, whimsical escape from reality - that Artemis Fowl: The Last Guardian succeeds, completely and surely.
Okay, semi-professional review aside, I need to get feelings off my chest.
Hah. No way. Huhuh. He actually did it. He wrote it! Those words. Oh man, those words. I can't believe it. Not Percy Jackson. Not Katniss Everdeen. Not even Harry Effing Potter...!
I almost believed them, too, as the last chapter rolled on and the camera zoomed out into a panoramic focus. I'll admit I was stunned. Darn, I thought, darn it, Colfer, you're a tough one. But then, of course, it all looped back onto itself. I appreciated the last couple of sentences very much; it was a straightforward, honest invitation to pull a ten-year-old copy of the very first Artemis Fowl off my shelf, open the pages, and begin again.
Colfer's dedication here reads: "For all the Fowl fans who journeyed to the Lower Elements with me. Thank you." I say - it's been a pleasure, Mr. Colfer. I'll revisit again, and again, and again, as I hope many children and teens and adults and, heck, old grannies in their rocking chairs do. There's been no finer team to save the world on a regular basis with.
Re: "The Last Guardian" title and implication - I was right! Kind of. Muahaha. Well, tell me what you think.
[Earlier edits below.]
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UPDATE UPDATE: (3/24/12) I just read the first chapter sneak peak, and, good golly gee, Eoin Colfer is back as though he'd never left. Even though The Atlantis Complex had been slightly out of tune with the rest of the series, The Last Guardian may yet prove to be a splendid, splendid tale. One chapter in and we've already got a hostage crisis, and the world is at risk from nuclear fission and quantum physics. Now, to sit tight, and wait for July... and to finally catch Colfer when he comes on tour.
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UPDATE: The Last Guardian. It sounds terribly... terminal. What, with all these "last" titles - The Last Olympian, for example - we become even more depressed at the thought of the series ending.
The Last Guardian... the last guardian of what? Of Haven? Atlantis? Of the fairy world?
It makes sense, I think, to say that Artemis has been the human guardian of the great fairy secret of the Lower Elements.
I don't want to speculate very much. I trust Eoin Colfer. Whatever grand ending he comes up with, I am sure that Artemis Fowl's exit music will be very much to our liking, and just the sort of conclusion such a fantastic series deserves.
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Omgomgomgomgomg. But 2012? Stop this madness! Or else fetch me No.1 so that he can warp some time.
Apparently Colfer will be giving some web interview sooner or later... perhaps he can drop a teasing tidbit or two. :)