Mad Amos Malone: The Complete Stories

by Alan Dean Foster

Strange characters cast long shadows over the Old West. There was Paul Bunyan. There was Pecos Bill. Strangest of all was the giant mountain man they called Mad Amos Malone. Atop his massive, swift, and permanently irascible steed Worthless, Mad Amos crops up everywhere from the construction of the transcontinental railroad to a poor woman's kitchen, confronting everything from Yellowstone spirits to yellow-bellied snake-oil salesmen. Maybe a little crazed, maybe a little other-dimensional, and always impossible to tell if he's just a left a room at the asylum or the Sorbonne. With his saddlebags overflowing with mysteries you'd better not try to peruse, to his mount that you'd best not try to rustle, Mad Amos roams the Old West settling scores, righting wrongs, and just occasionally coming up against trolls, sprites, dragons, spirits of the Earth, evil magicians--and most dangerous of all, dogs and cats. Thar's gold, guns, liquor, wimmen, good spells and evil spells. Mad Amos deals with 'em all. Just keep clear of his Sharp's rifle and the fact that he hasn't had a bath in weeks.

Genres: Fantasy, Westerns, Fiction, Historical Fiction, Weird West, Anthologies

358 pages, Paperback

First published May 11, 2019

About the author

Bestselling science fiction writer Alan Dean Foster was born in New York City in 1946, but raised mainly in California. He received a B.A. in Political Science from UCLA in 1968, and a M.F.A. in 1969. Foster lives in Arizona with his wife, but he enjoys traveling because it gives him opportunities to meet new people and explore new places and cultures. This interest is carried over to his writing, but with a twist: the new places encountered in his books are likely to be on another planet, and the people may belong to an alien race.

Foster began his career as an author when a letter he sent to Arkham Collection was purchased by the editor and published in the magazine in 1968. His first novel, The Tar-Aiym Krang, introduced the Humanx Commonwealth, a galactic alliance between humans and an insectlike race called Thranx. Several other novels, including the Icerigger trilogy, are also set in the world of the Commonwealth. The Tar-Aiym Krang also marked the first appearance of Flinx, a young man with paranormal abilities, who reappears in other books, including Orphan Star, For Love of Mother-Not, and Flinx in Flux.

Foster has also written The Damned series and the Spellsinger series, which includes The Hour of the Gate, The Moment of the Magician, The Paths of the Perambulator, and Son of Spellsinger, among others. Other books include novelizations of science fiction movies and television shows such as Star Trek, The Black Hole, Starman, Star Wars, and the Alien movies. Splinter of the Mind's Eye, a bestselling novel based on the Star Wars movies, received the Galaxy Award in 1979. The book Cyber Way won the Southwest Book Award for Fiction in 1990. His novel Our Lady of the Machine won him the UPC Award (Spain) in 1993. He also won the Ignotus Award (Spain) in 1994 and the Stannik Award (Russia) in 2000.

Reviews

[Little Timmy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Foster is one of my top 5 writers. This complete collection is a fantastic read, funny fast paced and great ideas for plots. Very recommended

[Richard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Alan Dean Foster has had quite an illustrious career. His books have been in print for many decades. I'm sure you've seen a few in whatever bookshop you frequent. He also has quite an impressive number of movie novelizations under his belt. To which, he has recently made headlines on social media. Possibly highlighting a potential grey area in copyright law.

Meet Mad Amos Malone. A man larger than most. With a knowledge that belies his disheveled appearance. His horse, Worthless, is an excellent companion, but not to underestimated. Mad Amos Malone always leaves things better than how he finds them.

This book just showed up in my feed one day on social media. The premise reminded me a lot of Wellman's Silver John series and Drake's Old Nathan stories. Having enjoyed both, I couldn't wait to get my hands on a copy. Although I can only read one book at a time...

Mad Amos Malone is a well known figure in the west. The people, when they speak of him, whisper. His size, and formidable mien discourage casual contact with other folks. Regardless, people still see him out with their strange and sometimes otherworldly problems.

Much of the dialogue is written with the vernacular of the time and region. I only mention this as a warning to those who cannot abide with reading dialogue written in this way.

Eighteen stories blending fact with fiction. These stories span about forty years or writing. One story is original to this collection.

Some of my favorites were:

Wu-ling's Folly

Everyone knows dragons aren't real, but one just stole the gold from a stagecoach. With the first occurrence theft is suspected. But as more and more incidents occur the authorities realize they are in over their heads. Mad Amos Malone is summoned. How can one man stop a creature that breathes fire and eats molten gold?

Jackalope

A big game hunter is ruminating about his past exploits at the saloon. Retirement seems to be his only recourse. You see he has hunted everything there is to be hunted the world over. Amos suggests the Jackalope. Believing it to be a joke the hunter goes along with the 'game'. To his surprise he bags a Jackalope, but what kind of creature calls the Jackalope prey? The hunter becomes the hunted.

What You See...

A traveling huckster is selling a miracle tonic. Malone intervenes and miraculously heals an old farmer with just a wooden cup and stream water. The huckster intends to steal the cup. What he finds is something hungrier than his avarice.

Neither a Borrower Be...

A trio of ne'er do wells steal Worthless and two other horses from a remote cabin after a snow storm. Worthless makes them regret their greed.

The Purl of the Pacific

The Hawaii vacation episode. Amos Malone has come as a favor to a friend. Recovers a fabled hook, how exactly will that stave off the destruction of the island?

Holy Jingle

A prostitute from China has a local man under her spell. She is feeding off his life energy. Amos decides to swap places and discovers that the girl is possessed by a Huli jing.

A fantastic collection of tall tales not to be missed.

Recommended!

[Howard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Although I was familiar with Alan Dean Foster as a science fiction author, I was not familiar with this bit of fantasy until it came across my update stream. This is in the tradition of John Bunyan and Pecos Bill [a fantastical figure travelling across the US]. It more specifically grows out of Manly Wade Wellman's Silver John series. [David Drake's Old Nathan also came out of Silver John].

This is a collection of all the Mad Amos Malone stories [so far], in chronological order, dating from 1982 to 2018. I believe that all but the last story were previously published. There are 18 stories in all. Amos is a mountain of a man and rides a steed of many breeds including unicorn. Amos cannot help but get involved when it means the betterment of good folk. He is often called upon to deal with dragons, spirits, curses, and more. The stories are well written, and are entertaining. I plan on reading Drakes Old Nathan and than checking out Wellman's Silver John series. Is that Silver John caught up a tree in the last story?

[Jaime K · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed all these shorts aboutAmos Malone, his not-horse, Worthless, and the magic (both fictional, herbal, and scientific) they perform. The beginning of each includes an excerpt from Foster about how the story came about. And I like how each takes place in different places, from Colorado to Texas to California to Missouri to Hawaii (and other areas).
Amos can speak many languages, including indigenous ones and that of dragons. It makes me wonder who/what he really is beyond a simple mountain man.
Some supernatural creatures that make an appearance are dragon, uniform, chimera, jackalope, wolf, Gargantua

Wu-Ling’s Folly: A dragon summoned by a Chinese railroad worker is greedy for gold that Amos has to deal with.

Ferrohippus: A real Iron Horse makes “iron horse” railroad workers realize they should put their rails elsewhere

Witchen Woes: A kitchen witch disappears a young wife’s husband and family, and Amos has a spicy cook-off with her.

Jackalope: Rife with supernatural creatures, Amos shows a hunter that seeking out the mythical (yet real) jackalope has some major consequences

The Chrome Comanche: Like Foster, I don’t like time travel stories. Yet ones like this I have enjoyed. A couple and their son think they’re being haunted by ghosts/Comanche devils. Amos realizes that the sounds are Shoshone. The mystery of the sounds are not so supernatural…but the chrome beast that comes out of nowhere (a car from the future) significantly startles even Amos.

Agrarian Deform: Amos agrees to help out farmers who are struggling with bad soil, only to find out another man named Sam was also hired. Here we see Amos’ sense of humor (I chuckled), and his morality (he will not succumb to a flirtatious wife). We also see some benefits of unicorns, including unicorn seeds. As he and Sam prove each others’ worth, a lot of fun magic happens and information about nitrogen being needed for soil. Except…well, Sam’s magic isn’t worth much and Amos fears that even nitrogen won’t help the sour soil in the long run. We can just say that it’s Sam Andreas’ fault.

Having Words: Like the previous story, this one sets to explain the spitting at Yellowstone. Amos gets into wordplay with a demon ending up in a paradox that makes me chuckle. But he was asked to do this by Cheyenne, because they believe that a lone medicine man is hurting the tribe and preventing them from going into part of the land. We also see some more mysteries around Amos.

What You See…: This was a fun short about how Amos stops a “doctor” from selling fake elixirs by helping a woman’s husband (though he helped himself), mentioning the fact his cup is a grail…and the other man, being greedy, tries to steal it during the night only to learn that Amos has some nefarious things in his saddles.

Neither a Borrower Be…: We learn even more just how WEIRD Worthless is. For example, the unicorn bays at the moon after being “stolen” by some local boys.

The Purl of the Pacific: In Hawaii, Amos works with a local indigenous person to prevent a threat some being presents to the volcano. We again get some powerful results from cayenne.

Venting: Another one set in Yellowstone, this time with a demon preventing people from entering the newly named national park. Amos calls in a debt from a demon named Nick. He’s later called the Devil, but I think it’s more a major demon than the Devil Devil (but I’m not the author). A lot from this was reminiscent of the Hollows series by Kim Harrison.

Free Elections: Some person has decided to ride into town and sit on their well for two weeks without doing much other than rocking back and forth. Amos gets into a sitting/setting spell with the man and the concept of ever-moving atoms (and a conversation with Marie Curie) comes into play. Very weird.

Ghost Wind: Amos is sick with a cold, and his sneezes are quite severe. Enough that a crazy not-wind blasts apart some of a town.

Claim Blame: Who has claim to mines: the humans or gnomes? Amos lets leprechauns decide and the gnomes are sent to what they decide to call the City of Gnome. In the arctic. Nome Alaska? I like this is based on real events (sand gnomes)

Holy Jingle: This is also based on real events in Nevada Territory in 1863, minus the supernatural (or so I believe). It’s an odd story of essentially a succubus who takes over a woman’s body, but the woman doesn’t recal the possession.

A Treefold Problem: Instead of sneezes, we get a massive fart from Worthless, who helps Amos save a farmer’s property from someone determined to take back the land. I had to chuckle at how Amos handles a potential seduction.

A Mountain Man and a Cat Walk into a Bar…: Of course Foster’s cats helped him complete the “A mountain man and … walk into a bar.” Cats. And in a fight with a dog vs cat, Foster shows that he is most definitely a cat person.

Stuck: Amos helps a man named John trapped by a tree in a forest. Then the tres retaliate and try to trap them both. Fortunately, Amos knows the language of many animals.

[Rob Caswell · Rating 5 out of 5]

While the fantasy Western theme is a bit of a variation from my usual, I trusted Foster to deliver some entertaining tales and he didn't disappoint. The Mad Amos tales are like the Paul Bunyan tale tale format with Looney Tunes action highlights. The main characters, the giant, worldy, educated mountain man-cum-wizard and his faithful.... "steed" drive the appeal, smiles, and out-loud laughter of each of the eighteen tales. This is my kind of fantasy - an intentional sampling of myth and magic, processed through the lens of the American Old West. Clever, delightful, and well-crafted, this collection of stories was like a scrumptious box of literary chocolates (sans coconut and licorice).

[Miguel Mendoza · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a compilation of short stories regarding Mad Amos Malone. A mountain man whom many would deem mad due to the myriad number of unnatural situations he finds himself in (such as a cooking contest with a wee witch or a battle of insults with a shaman). A giant of a man armed with his Sharpes Buffalo Rifle, LeMat Pistol, and "faithful" steed Worthless, his journeys are a pleasure to behold.

This has been one of my favorite books for quite some time. While it may not be an epic read, the stories and characters had me coming back to reread them many times over the years.

[Bri Valentine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Crazy fun. I didn't expect to enjoy the book of short stories so much. I am very glad it was recommended to me. Amos is truly a Great American hero and his adventures are epic!

[Caleb · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this weird west short story collection in high school and remember enjoying it quite a bit. Upon reading it again I found it to be much less enjoyable. Sadly it did not age well

[Scott Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

My introduction to Foster's Mad Amos character was nearly four decades ago, stumbling across one or two of the stories in a collection that sat on a fifth-grade teacher's classroom shelf. Years later, I happened across a mass-market paperback collection of the stories published through the mid-1990s. That volume sat in my library until replaced by this one, received as Christmas gift just weeks ago.

It's easy to tell that this is Foster's "weird western" take on a Paul Bunyan character and associated tale tales, and as you'd expect, the tales are not exactly deep, but are fun and breezy, particularly if the reader is of an older bend and has some memory of the western as a popularized genre from generations past. The stories are a bit formulaic, sometimes built around a pun or other silly conceit (that most versed readers will probably see coming a ways off), and the earlier tales definitely show a bit more of a... rough social edge, as Foster was at least somewhat accurate in his depictions and descriptions of Wild-West-adjacent culture. He does a good job at moderating those same edges in the more recently-written stories without losing the same level of authenticity found in the older tales.

Worth a pick-up for a quick read, particularly if "Twiligh Zone" meets "Gunsmoke" by way of, say, a bit of British farce sounds like a good fit for your tastes. :)

[Jeff · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amos Malone is a mountain man in the Old West, but he is much more than that. He seems to be a wizard of sorts and rides a horse that is part unicorn. He has a knack of showing up just when someone needs his help against problems that turn out to be supernatural in origin. These stories are a great mixture of western and fantasy and I couldn't help thinking, while reading them, that, if done correctly, Mad Amos would be great as a TV series.

[Paxton Holley · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was an interesting collection of stories. They all center on this mountain man named Amos Malone. Everyone calls him Mad Amos. He is an abnormally large man that has an unsettling familiarity with arcane affairs. He’s like the Wild West version of John Constantine. He encounters dragons, demons, leprechauns, gnomes a kitchen witch, and even the devil himself.

Lots of fun stories and encounters in this book.

[Nan Silvernail · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stories of Mad Amos Malone and Worthless.
Amazing tales of a gigantic mountain man and his steed, both creatures that are so much more than the strict sum of their parts. Forces for Good in the wild land of the far West of the USA. Is he a wizard? Could well be. Is his horse more than a horse, oh, most definitely.
Come along with them from the Rockies all the way to Maui and leave wanting more!

[Liz · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a joy to read a book with "big", complicated words in it. Brilliant. Real english.

[Wayne]

This volume is different from the previous collection 'Mad Amos' in that it has eight newer stories.

[Charlie Nelson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This collection of stories was fun. It was interesting and always had a little surprise at the end. Most people would enjoy this. I know I did.

[Mark Hartman · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really wanted to like this book. It starts out good but I was bored by the end and skimmed the rest. Alan Dean Foster is a good author but this book just wasn’t all that entertaining.