As an adoptee I read this memoir with great interest and I write this review from this perspective. I have keenly read the other reviews here and will acknowledge that I am one of the few who wanted more from his work.
Tickner is one of only a few Australian male adoptee's who have written of their experience and for this reason I highly commend his work, it is an important contribution to the small, but growing genre of adoptive life writing. As adoptees from the Stolen Generations age beyond their 50's publishers must do everything they can, now, to capture these important pieces of cultural history.
I am fascinated that a large portion of Australian adoptive memoir is written by established writers and notable professionals and there are few written works penned by everyday 'unknowns', whom constitute the majority of Australian adoptees and first parents!
In '10 doors down' Tickner spends the majority of his memoir detailing his professional life and while it is impressive and he has facilitated real change, I was left with the feeling that this was often a distraction from the main story, the real story; his adoption. As I got further and further into his memoir the constant grandstanding became annoying and I wondered at the purpose of his book. Was this work a memoir of adoption, or a memoir of a rich political life ? Tickner writes of others and their adoptive narratives with force and passion, but when the story rightly turns to his adoptive narrative, he skirts around the edges and avoids the deeper uncomfortable emotional details. For instance on page 138 Tickner states 'that may sound strange, but it was how I felt', in reference to his adoptee guilt. It was here, that Tickner could have elaborated what drives this sense of guilt frequently experienced by adoptees, especially in the nervous lead up to meeting their biological parents. Again on page 140, Tickner avoids going deeper and describes his feeling in one brief sentence at the reunion with his mother Maida, 'the feelings were overwhelming, and I was so nervous that at first I could hardly speak'. The dialogue that follows describes what his mother looked like, where they went in the hours after this momentous life changing occasion and the details of Maida's life lived without him. Tickner continues the chapter in this manner, his words touch briefly on the emotion of their reunion, but never lingering for long, his writing is forever moving forward. He ends the chapter with another brief hint at his inner world, 'I felt uplifted and empowered..I desperately wanted to know more about how my mother was feeling'.
My question to Robert is 'how were you feeling ?'.
As I turned the page to Chapter 13, Tickner begins with the enticing phrase, 'I felt daunted'. I get excited in the hope that finally the author is going to open up and share with the reader (me) his vulnerability! Alas, it is yet another emotional tidbit which hits a dead end three lines in and is followed yet again by another political anecdote. Their are numerous moments like this throughout the book, too many to mention where Tickner either hints at his emotionality, writes in a manner which washes over his inner world, or he simply avoids mentioning how a scenario made him feel by focusing instead on his interpretation at the other persons experience (p.158, p.160, 164, 167).
Tickners constant glossing over of his loss and grief is not unusual for an adoptee, many of us feel we have no right to feel anything other than 'grateful' for our adoption. However, this is one of the many malignant myths fashioned decades ago to aid the societal acceptance of the forced adoption policy in Australia. I would love to see a second edition of 'Ten Doors down', but only if it is reworked with Roberts inner world.