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ApocaOOPS
Everything is all Doug’s fault. The Horn of Destiny is missing from the Seraphim Symphonic practice room and the Apocalypse is set to begin prematurely. He always was a clumsy GA-1 (Guardian Angel First Degree). No wonder he never got promoted.
Now the fate of the world rests in the hands of his human client, a mentally unstable trumpet player named Steve who takes all his advice from his pet cat Smokey. Oh, and someone on earth had the bright idea to run the dreaded Horn of Destiny through a 3-D printer and sell copies on eBay. God help us all!
Now the fate of the world rests in the hands of his human client, a mentally unstable trumpet player named Steve who takes all his advice from his pet cat Smokey. Oh, and someone on earth had the bright idea to run the dreaded Horn of Destiny through a 3-D printer and sell copies on eBay. God help us all!
328 pages, Kindle Edition
Published February 9, 2020
About the author
Paul E. Creasy
3 books28 followers Paul Creasy was born in Radford, Virginia, the only child of Victor (Gene) and Marla Creasy. He grew up in the small town of Bluefield, West Virginia before moving to Richmond, Virginia where he graduated from Virginia Commonwealth University.
He continues to reside in Richmond today, with his lovely wife Mary and their rambunctious puppy Truffle. Apart from writing, Paul enjoys old horror movies, obscure documentaries, new books, Christian apologetics, ballroom dancing with his wife, and traveling extensively.
Further information can be found at www.paulcreasy.com
He continues to reside in Richmond today, with his lovely wife Mary and their rambunctious puppy Truffle. Apart from writing, Paul enjoys old horror movies, obscure documentaries, new books, Christian apologetics, ballroom dancing with his wife, and traveling extensively.
Further information can be found at www.paulcreasy.com
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
June 29, 2020
I can't praise this book enough! It made me giggle more than once and I'm sure that I've missed some of the nuances since it was very specific to Americain pop culture at times. The way the author interweaved his plot with the happenings in the world is nothing short of brilliant.
It all starts in the year 1017 when a monk gives a rather insane prophecy...with references to KFC and other modern world business...that says that a man called Steve will end the world. Timeshift to 2018 and we meet Steve who's bipolar and in a meeting with his psychiatrist about wanting to lower his meds. At first glance he seems rather normal...until he comes home to his talking cat.
Yeah the whole talking cat thing, funny and sarcasstic he might be, is a thing that made no sense but I decided to just go with it.
Anyway Steve has an accident and dies. Apparantly heaven is run rather businesslike but it seems that his guardian angel Doug made a mistake and collected Steve too early he wasn't meant to die! Steve thinks he's having another episode wreaks havoc when he accidentely knocks the Horn of Destiny down to earth. The horn that when blown is the start sign for the apocalypse.
I'm not going to spoil the rest of the plot because it's something one should experience. I will say that my favorite character in the book is Jessie Belle. This lady knows her stuff and what her duty is. She's the only character that's pro-active and willing to do her work.
If you like a bit of religious satire interwoven with rather current happenings this is the book for you.
It all starts in the year 1017 when a monk gives a rather insane prophecy...with references to KFC and other modern world business...that says that a man called Steve will end the world. Timeshift to 2018 and we meet Steve who's bipolar and in a meeting with his psychiatrist about wanting to lower his meds. At first glance he seems rather normal...until he comes home to his talking cat.
Yeah the whole talking cat thing, funny and sarcasstic he might be, is a thing that made no sense but I decided to just go with it.
Anyway Steve has an accident and dies. Apparantly heaven is run rather businesslike but it seems that his guardian angel Doug made a mistake and collected Steve too early he wasn't meant to die! Steve thinks he's having another episode wreaks havoc when he accidentely knocks the Horn of Destiny down to earth. The horn that when blown is the start sign for the apocalypse.
I'm not going to spoil the rest of the plot because it's something one should experience. I will say that my favorite character in the book is Jessie Belle. This lady knows her stuff and what her duty is. She's the only character that's pro-active and willing to do her work.
If you like a bit of religious satire interwoven with rather current happenings this is the book for you.
March 8, 2020
Strange but very interesting. While reading I wasn't sure if it was a spoof on the Bible or sacrilegious or both. After reading I tried to find out more about the author's personal beliefs but there wasn't much to find. As a believer, I choose to think it is just a funny imaginative look behind the scenes of some Bible prophecy if set in modern times. Whatever it is, it is definitely an interesting read.
March 3, 2020
I love the chapter names.
Not sure if this is sacrilegious or not. Mixed feelings on the book. I did enjoy it and liked the play on names. I do agree with Big Mike at the end with his advice for Valerie. Would probably read more by this author.
Not sure if this is sacrilegious or not. Mixed feelings on the book. I did enjoy it and liked the play on names. I do agree with Big Mike at the end with his advice for Valerie. Would probably read more by this author.
August 21, 2020
Interesting read... Comedic, tongue in cheek.. The Revelations, Seven deadly sins.. Good vs bad.. evidently things can go awry even in Heaven.. oh and a sassy, sarcastic talking cat...
July 1, 2021
Very Uplifting
It was a pretty good read. A funny new take on the battle between good and evil. I would recommend it to family and friends.
It was a pretty good read. A funny new take on the battle between good and evil. I would recommend it to family and friends.
November 22, 2020
Quick read hat entertained the whole time.
March 29, 2021
A fun read. Had some of my favorite topics I like good vs evil and the seven deadly sins, add some comedy and throw in a wise ass talking cat and I'm sold!
March 2, 2020
An otherwise good book, utterly fumbled in the last 15%. I can't even understand what the author was thinking, switching from comedy to Bible-thumping (think reducing a satirical Richard Dawkins to a foetal rocking mess, actual Bible verses, and slut-shaming the only character in the room questioning events as they're going down).
This book was like two books in one. One, about Steve and his cat, was funny and engaging; the other, about punishing sinners, was neither of those things. You'll see some very thinly veiled real-life people in this book (eg Harvey Weinstein - terrible timing on publishing there - and Alex Jones, plus a well-known prosperity preacher). You'll also find that women are only crazy or objects, that those that challenge the economic status quo are pathetic, smelly, envious weirdoes, oh and atheists are going to burn in hell don't-ya-know.
And it's worth mentioning how the plot is resolved -
I recommended this book to a friend part-way through; now I wish I hadn't.
I can't see this book making anybody other than a straight, employed, American, Christian, probably libertarian man happy. If the author wants to reach success beyond that, I'd suggest to re-eval and rewrite.
2.5⭐
This book was like two books in one. One, about Steve and his cat, was funny and engaging; the other, about punishing sinners, was neither of those things. You'll see some very thinly veiled real-life people in this book (eg Harvey Weinstein - terrible timing on publishing there - and Alex Jones, plus a well-known prosperity preacher). You'll also find that women are only crazy or objects, that those that challenge the economic status quo are pathetic, smelly, envious weirdoes, oh and atheists are going to burn in hell don't-ya-know.
And it's worth mentioning how the plot is resolved -
I recommended this book to a friend part-way through; now I wish I hadn't.
I can't see this book making anybody other than a straight, employed, American, Christian, probably libertarian man happy. If the author wants to reach success beyond that, I'd suggest to re-eval and rewrite.
2.5⭐
July 11, 2024
Who caused our ruin?
Who brought our fall?
Who scattered all to grieve?
‘Tis some lunatic by the name of Steve.
From the prophecies of Brother Maynard
Benedictine monk, County Kent
July 15th, 1017
St. Swithun's Day
4+ stars! I really enjoyed Paul E. Creasy's extremely wacky "ApocaOOPS" and would have probably torn through the whole book on my day off if I had started an hour or two earlier. It reads extremely fast and even though the editing occasionally gets away from being on point (who is Val-A-rie? And you put your JAMBES in the air during sex, not your James… well, there are exceptions), it was a lot of fun AND quite funny to boot. The humor is often quite subtle and I enjoyed the kind of mind-games that popped up, you know, sometimes pun-y but not really, too. Then again there are spots where these bits charge ahead like a giant bronze bull having a go at a crowd of overheated hippies (trust me on that one) and if you miss out, well, all I can say is that we'll pray for you. We may also call on the chihuahuas, too, while we're at it. We are looking at the most astonishing mucktastrophy of all times, you know!
It was the ultimate enema gone wrong, a true shitstorm of biblical proportions.
And I mean, yeah, sure, a book that employs mental illness as a constant source of merriment as well as leaning quite far on an obvious Christian slant to "things" (waves in a sweeping wavey way, particularly at some of the rather lengthy quote-y bits) isn't going to be everyone's cup of tea. But then again, it pays to know your target audience who probably have suffered through at least one of those "mindful" issues at some point in their lives. I'll just leave my own opinion sitting here on this window ledge with a small sign saying "I'm working on my mental health" and hope that is enough to make my own opinion clear. Oh and speaking of which, it is really going to bother the boiling lava heck out of me for the next weeks as to why there was a talking cat at all. The end of the world and the demise of several famous people: fully explained. Snarky feline roommate with a disturbing amount of interest in conspiracy theories? Not so much…
Abandon all hope ye who enter here — and have a nice day!
I was trying to think of which books from my past readings this one reminded me of, but honestly, I've got so many "Angels on Earth, Devils on Earth, 4 Horsemen hanging out, Saints playing golf, etc." tomes that I could list, well, my review would be nothing but that. Though I do think it's a compliment to have been reminded not only of the occasional work by Sir Terry Pratchett (no, not 'Good Omens', I mean some of HIS much better books) as well as perhaps in recent months the "How To Be Dead" series by Dave Turner. And yes, I do think that Creasy did quite well to make a lot of what transpired very unique, especially if you're looking for such glorious tid-bits (I encourage you for at least Brandi's sake not to mispronounce that) as Jessie Belle or even Big Mike.
There is no force in the universe more evil than a bunch of thirteen-year-old girls.
And let's be very honest here: how much more relevant and laughingly real do we need things to be when referring to lusty Hollywood pervs by the name of Harvey Manstein or shock-jocks named Rusty Jones working to rile up the masses on his broadcasts at WRTH (which naturally more often than not focus on the evils of immigration no matter how 'inaccurate' his facts wind up being)! And I was truly howling with atheistic glee at watching what went down with mega-rich "pastor" Joel Borsteen, who was desperately seeking above all else an upgrade to his private jet collection! Witnessing their specially designed demises (demisi?) was a thing of true beauty that I only wish went beyond mere fiction (you know, vs. actual headlines)! And if somehow the tornado of Cheeto dust that offed poor (ha!) Trey Stoneman (great name for one who embraced sloth!) - who lives/d at Lazy Beaver Way (bwhahaha!) - could have also taken out a certain orange-skinned felon and rid all of civilized society of his on-going imperialistic and hate-filled rantings, well... But I digress… though only just.
Stupid is your primary artistic medium.
Yes, if you haven't figured out by now, this book gets pretty wacky and I'm not just referring to the entrance to Hell found at Dante’s Inferno Casino & Resort (666 South Las Vegas Boulevard... I mean, how much more obvious can it be than to be in Las Vegas, huh?). Hm, that might actually be more believable than not. No, I refer to my referenced literary, um, references earlier but you could even argue that there are some cinematic influences to be found in all this as well. Think "Heaven Can Wait" (yes, I'm old dammit!) combined with maybe one of Dan Brown's filmed plots ("Angels & Demons" anyone?) and perhaps even a good dose of "The Good Place" and you'd be getting closer and closer. But again, Creasy manages to put all of these situations into a follow-able (it's a word, dammit!) plot that also manages to get us concerned about the characters we meet along the way!
Enjoy legs with your eggs and tits with your grits.
And what with our tale covering at very least a full millennium, that's no small feat! Though to be fair, "One thousand and one years is a long time, so we have nothing to worry about today. Relax!" Still, I mean, who wouldn't want poor Doug to achieve his GA-2 upgrade? Well, you know despite this new screw-up and also that whole Roswell incident… So if the idea of the fate of our entire world rest of the decisions of those gathered to meet at the Denny’s Restaurant at Exit 12 on the New Jersey Turnpike sounds like you're kind of thing - and we've all been there, am I right? - then by all means, read away! Now if you'll excuse me, I am oddly still in the mood for a good Southern breakfast and a show. Enjoy!
Who brought our fall?
Who scattered all to grieve?
‘Tis some lunatic by the name of Steve.
From the prophecies of Brother Maynard
Benedictine monk, County Kent
July 15th, 1017
St. Swithun's Day
4+ stars! I really enjoyed Paul E. Creasy's extremely wacky "ApocaOOPS" and would have probably torn through the whole book on my day off if I had started an hour or two earlier. It reads extremely fast and even though the editing occasionally gets away from being on point (who is Val-A-rie? And you put your JAMBES in the air during sex, not your James… well, there are exceptions), it was a lot of fun AND quite funny to boot. The humor is often quite subtle and I enjoyed the kind of mind-games that popped up, you know, sometimes pun-y but not really, too. Then again there are spots where these bits charge ahead like a giant bronze bull having a go at a crowd of overheated hippies (trust me on that one) and if you miss out, well, all I can say is that we'll pray for you. We may also call on the chihuahuas, too, while we're at it. We are looking at the most astonishing mucktastrophy of all times, you know!
It was the ultimate enema gone wrong, a true shitstorm of biblical proportions.
And I mean, yeah, sure, a book that employs mental illness as a constant source of merriment as well as leaning quite far on an obvious Christian slant to "things" (waves in a sweeping wavey way, particularly at some of the rather lengthy quote-y bits) isn't going to be everyone's cup of tea. But then again, it pays to know your target audience who probably have suffered through at least one of those "mindful" issues at some point in their lives. I'll just leave my own opinion sitting here on this window ledge with a small sign saying "I'm working on my mental health" and hope that is enough to make my own opinion clear. Oh and speaking of which, it is really going to bother the boiling lava heck out of me for the next weeks as to why there was a talking cat at all. The end of the world and the demise of several famous people: fully explained. Snarky feline roommate with a disturbing amount of interest in conspiracy theories? Not so much…
Abandon all hope ye who enter here — and have a nice day!
I was trying to think of which books from my past readings this one reminded me of, but honestly, I've got so many "Angels on Earth, Devils on Earth, 4 Horsemen hanging out, Saints playing golf, etc." tomes that I could list, well, my review would be nothing but that. Though I do think it's a compliment to have been reminded not only of the occasional work by Sir Terry Pratchett (no, not 'Good Omens', I mean some of HIS much better books) as well as perhaps in recent months the "How To Be Dead" series by Dave Turner. And yes, I do think that Creasy did quite well to make a lot of what transpired very unique, especially if you're looking for such glorious tid-bits (I encourage you for at least Brandi's sake not to mispronounce that) as Jessie Belle or even Big Mike.
There is no force in the universe more evil than a bunch of thirteen-year-old girls.
And let's be very honest here: how much more relevant and laughingly real do we need things to be when referring to lusty Hollywood pervs by the name of Harvey Manstein or shock-jocks named Rusty Jones working to rile up the masses on his broadcasts at WRTH (which naturally more often than not focus on the evils of immigration no matter how 'inaccurate' his facts wind up being)! And I was truly howling with atheistic glee at watching what went down with mega-rich "pastor" Joel Borsteen, who was desperately seeking above all else an upgrade to his private jet collection! Witnessing their specially designed demises (demisi?) was a thing of true beauty that I only wish went beyond mere fiction (you know, vs. actual headlines)! And if somehow the tornado of Cheeto dust that offed poor (ha!) Trey Stoneman (great name for one who embraced sloth!) - who lives/d at Lazy Beaver Way (bwhahaha!) - could have also taken out a certain orange-skinned felon and rid all of civilized society of his on-going imperialistic and hate-filled rantings, well... But I digress… though only just.
Stupid is your primary artistic medium.
Yes, if you haven't figured out by now, this book gets pretty wacky and I'm not just referring to the entrance to Hell found at Dante’s Inferno Casino & Resort (666 South Las Vegas Boulevard... I mean, how much more obvious can it be than to be in Las Vegas, huh?). Hm, that might actually be more believable than not. No, I refer to my referenced literary, um, references earlier but you could even argue that there are some cinematic influences to be found in all this as well. Think "Heaven Can Wait" (yes, I'm old dammit!) combined with maybe one of Dan Brown's filmed plots ("Angels & Demons" anyone?) and perhaps even a good dose of "The Good Place" and you'd be getting closer and closer. But again, Creasy manages to put all of these situations into a follow-able (it's a word, dammit!) plot that also manages to get us concerned about the characters we meet along the way!
Enjoy legs with your eggs and tits with your grits.
And what with our tale covering at very least a full millennium, that's no small feat! Though to be fair, "One thousand and one years is a long time, so we have nothing to worry about today. Relax!" Still, I mean, who wouldn't want poor Doug to achieve his GA-2 upgrade? Well, you know despite this new screw-up and also that whole Roswell incident… So if the idea of the fate of our entire world rest of the decisions of those gathered to meet at the Denny’s Restaurant at Exit 12 on the New Jersey Turnpike sounds like you're kind of thing - and we've all been there, am I right? - then by all means, read away! Now if you'll excuse me, I am oddly still in the mood for a good Southern breakfast and a show. Enjoy!
April 9, 2024
What can I say about Jessie Belle and the Four Horsemen trying to start the apocalypse so they can get a headstart in fighting Big Mike the Archangel and the rest of Heaven? It all starts with a prophecy by St. Maynard (not the Holy Hand Grenade guy of Monty Python fame) about a crazy guy named Steve, UPS Priority Ground deliveries, and the Horn of Destiny ending up on Earth. It just kind of goes downhill from there in this silly end-of-times (?) story.
I don't want to tell much about the story because you need to follow Steve through his hallucinations, visits to heaven, and his attempts to fix the mistake he made that could end the world.
I don't want to tell much about the story because you need to follow Steve through his hallucinations, visits to heaven, and his attempts to fix the mistake he made that could end the world.
October 9, 2024
It was....OK. Nothing crazy special, but also a unique story. I really did want to like it more, but was disappointed. It was a quick read though. Just funny enough to not DNR it.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews