My Dad's a Muslim, My Mom's a Lesbian, and I'm a Latter-day Saint

by Mike Ramsey

Since Mike was a child, his life was full of questions and confusion. Where was his dad? Why did he have two moms? Where was God in all of it? Throughout the fun, sad, frustrating, and uplifting experiences that weave together the story of Mike's life from his earliest childhood through marriage and having children of his own, he discovers his faith and learns that understanding begins with love.

Genres: Memoir

149 pages, ebook

Published September 1, 2019

Reviews

[Morgan Stoker Taylor · Rating 3 out of 5]

I want to explain where my review is coming from. I grew up in Burley, ID and rubbed shoulders with the author and his family through dance. I appreciated this story so much knowing well the demographic and culture it took place. I felt a lot of appreciation and hope thinking of all the potential readers from my hometown. As a young adult I learned my brother was gay and it rocked and then expanded my whole world. Though the road was and is sometimes still confusing and rocky, my brother in my life and the way he’s affected my world view and faith is one of my biggest gifts from heavenly parents. Mike’s story gives readers the opportunity to explore the gray areas that faith really resides and invites us to become closer to Christ by learning to truly love unconditionally. Grateful for the honesty and humility it took to write this book.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author’s conversational writing style, honesty, and gentle humor makes this book highly readable. His situation growing up is one that is unique, which in itself makes it interesting. My hands-down favorite chapter of the book was the last one, in which he discusses the major lessons he has learned in his life so far. All the highlighting I did happened in that chapter. His message of tolerance in the form of allowing people to hold differing beliefs but still loving them resonated deeply with me. The world could use a lot more of that.

My only quibble with the book is that I found the title a little misleading, because The first line of the title is about the author’s dad being Muslim, and the book opens with the foreshadowing of what seems to be the huge event of the father contacting him. But other than the dad finding out he had a son, there really wasn’t a relationship between them, no discussion of the effect on the author’s life of having a father with a different religious background. In fact, a huge theme of the book was the absence of this father.

[Amber Spencer · Rating 4 out of 5]

While there isn’t a lot about the author’s dad, this is an honest look at the author’s life and how he came to see and love his mother and still was true to his beliefs.

[Heidi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book explored the journey a child goes through dealing with the struggle between the teachings of the Church and his mother's sexuality. I appreciated the author's authenticity and willingness to share his feelings in a very real way, even when they didn't portray himself in the best light (not always being accepting of his mom). I hope this book inspires more LDS real conversations about diversity and acceptance in the Church as we come to better value all voices and experiences.

Relatively quick read as well.

[Matt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Completely eye-opening, heartfelt, and open-minded. Anyone of any religion, belief, nationality, or sexuality should read this!

[Angela G · Rating 3 out of 5]

June 2025 Pride Month Reading Challenge - Book 3! I am challenging myself to read LGBTQ books during June.

Rounded down from 3.5. I wanted to like this book more than I did, for a few reasons. One, while the author shares a lot about his mother and their relationship, there is only a short bit about his father. I feel like this is a book that should be written in 5 or 10 years when there is more to tell. Like he had a wisp of an idea and just went for it, when it would have been so much better to wait. (Ironic, since a theme in the book is patience.) Second, while he does share the arc of his relationship with his mom, some parts are so painfully homophobic. I get that he felt that way, it is OK to acknowledge it, but I wish he would have shared more about his course correction. I have nothing but love for his two mothers, and he wrote their stories very respectfully. He was the one who needed to learn and change, and it felt sluggish to me. Third, there's extra stuff in there about his life, which I get (it's your memoir, you can write what you want), but I felt like it detracted from the overall point and I was bored. And last, allllll the spiritual stuff and lessons were tacked on at the very end, like an afterthought. I got a lot out of those and almost wish they would have been interspersed in other areas in the book, to balance it out.

Overall... I did learn something about the gay experience and especially where it intersects with LDS belief and culture. His moms are angels.

[Gayla Marks · Rating 5 out of 5]

A friend sent a copy of this book to me, knowing that I would like it. My friend and I were both raised in a small town in Idaho, just a few miles from where this author grew up.

The author’s parents separated before he was born and later divorce, without the father knowing that his ex-wife had been pregnant before they separated. Growing up with a mother who was finishing up her college degree and working to support him was hard on both of them. They eventually move back to southern Idaho to live with his mother’s parents. His mother eventually reveals to her son that she is gay. Another woman moves into their home and the author now has two mother
The maternal grandparents were the one stable constant in the author’s life, providing the guidance that he needed. The author’s mother loves her son fiercely but cannot be both mother and father to her son. That’s where the maternal grandparents really step up to the plate in their support for their daughter and grandson. The move back to southern Idaho provided the experiences that set the author on his adult course in life.

I loved how the author had to deal with tough things as he grew up and one could see that growth and maturing as time went by. The story gave me a greater appreciation for those people in our lives who love us and make their own sacrifices to provide the things we need as we mature.

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author’s story is very compelling. The book is about his life but more so about his relationship with his mom, how they heal their relationship through kindness, charity and Christlike understanding. It is also about waiting patiently and faithfully for events to play out and to look to God for guidance in your life.

One memorable part of the book for me was after Mike returns from his mission and keeps having arguments and disagreements with his mom about the gospel and her sexuality. He keeps leaving these discussions unhappy and contentious. Then he realizes that Christ probably never felt this way after teaching the gospel to his disciples. Mike comes to see that the only way to teach the gospel is with love and kindness. Being right is not more important than being kind when we are interacting with others.

[Nathalie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was expecting a humorous teen fiction for some reason but this autobiography was very interesting and at times appalling (due to the treatment he and his mother received at the hands of those who should know better.) The author, however, was able to overcome his rough beginning through his own determination and honesty when he found truth, through the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, which he had originally learned to distance himself from. I learned much on how to be better person from Mike Ramsey's experience.

[Clara Gee · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a 4.5 stars for me. I thought that there were a lot of great quotes and knowledge I gained from this book, but the biggest takeaway I gained was the importance of patience, something that just like for the author, is very hard for me. I felt very called out and understood many times when reading this book and felt like I learned a lot about how to deal with some of problems. Overall, I learned a lot and really enjoyed it

[Kaylynn Johnsen · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is a relatable read. His journey of self-discovery is one we all have to make.

[Lois · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a great book. Brought so much understanding. Loved the book. Read it in 2 days.

[Dennis Schleicher · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mike’s story will leave you riveting for more, a true page-turner. His conviction, his faith, leaves you wanting to share his story with everyone.
You will love every bit of this book! You will feel like your having a conversation with a friend.

-Dennis Schleicher, Author of;