Traumatized by Religious Abuse: Courage, Hope and Freedom for Survivors

by Connie Baker

Traumatized by Religious Abuse: Courage, Hope and Freedom for Survivors' is a comprehensive resource for those who have experienced religious abuse, be it psychological, verbal, sexual or financial. With authenticity, openness, and careful consideration of many different faith traditions, Connie provides a path to hope and healing.In 'Traumatized by Religious Abuse', the author answers the following questions: - How does abuse happen in religious institutions?- What is unique about religious abuse?- How are power and control used in religious abuse?- What are the hallmark characteristics of abusive leaders and abusive religious cultures?- What are the implicit and subtle messages used by abusers?- What are the emotional, mental and existential damages after abuse?- How can a survivor recover and heal?Connie A Baker covers in depth how religious ideas are often used to manipulate followers and how fear, shame, guilt, and superstition can be leveraged for control. She points out that spiritual and religious abuse is not confined to any one type of religion or cult. This dynamic of abusive behavior can be found in many types of spiritual communities.She writes from the perspective of a professional therapist who teaches and counsels survivors, and from her own perspective from being a survivor of religious abuse. "When I went through horrible religious abuse back in 1990, I was completely confused and without resources to get clarity and heal. I never want anyone to go through what I did after abuse. This is the book I needed back then and didn't have."

Genres: Religion, Nonfiction, Christian, Mental Health

308 pages, Paperback

Published June 18, 2019

Reviews

[Reta · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’d already determined that this book would be the last thing I’d read on religious abuse for a hot minute because sometimes reading has to be a non-triggering hobby, and these past few months reading has felt more like an educational, self-help, shut-the-cover-in-tears experience.

That being said, Baker shares more care for her readers than any other author I’ve read on the abuse topic… and I’ve read A LOT of authors on this topic. Mixed throughout her thorough explanations and psychological concepts, Baker establishes self-care “checkpoints” to help readers understand why they might be triggered and what they can do to calm themselves and move forward.

Baker’s chapter ending questions are thoughtful and conducive to journaling and self-discovery. She includes helpful appendices for spiritual leaders and those who may want to help survivors. She doesn’t push healing or religiosity on any of her readers, and she shares her story in a non-selfish way.

10/10 would recommend for those who have suffered spiritual abuse, those who are unsure if they’ve experienced spiritual abuse, and anyone in any religion that considers proselytizing.

[Ampersand · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went into this book really not knowing how it would effect me. I came from a strict evangelical background and only started recently even understanding that some of what I’ve experienced could be labeled as religious abuse. Instead of the church a lot of it was coming from my family. As an adult I understood a lot of what they were doing was manipulation but I couldn’t comprehend it further and didn’t know who to talk to so I got this book. Literally within the first chapter I felt so much validation. Just the term “evangelical Christianity” being in this book made me start seeing things in a new light. Because of my background and specific abuse that I’ve experienced as well as the way I was raised the MOST helpful chapter for me was “F for Forgiveness” and I know I’ll be referring to it again as I work through my healing.

This book is good for anyone who has been hurt or manipulated by the church OR religious family members. It shouldn’t be the only resource that you have however which the author does bring up. She incorporates self care and mental health very clearly and well within this book. 5/5

[Cherise Sheets · Rating 5 out of 5]

My marriage counselor referred me to Connie at a time when my marriage and myself were both crumbling. I didn’t know she specialized in religious abuse and the trauma it causes. I was only able to see her about 4 times, but it was life changing. She helped me see the root causes of why I was struggling the way I was, and for the first time I was beginning to see the reasons why I was broken in the way I was, and that I wasn’t deserving of the shame and self blame I carried for so long. After I no longer could see her, I read her book and continued to accept that what I endured was abuse so that I could begin to heal. Religious abuse is one of the most confusing and alienating things there is. You trust those that claim are led by God himself, and when you question them..you are questioning God. For too long, abuse in the church has not been addressed or validated. Connie’s wisdom is needed for the millions out there who are hurt, broken, ashamed, and confused and I’m so grateful the true God who has loved me unconditionally my whole life led me to Connie and into true healing.

[Scott Holstad · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not the best but not bad. And sadly, a very necessary book for millions of people in this day and age (if not for thousands of years in the past). Recommended for those suffering from RTS.

[Connie Cox · Rating 4 out of 5]

I gave it four stars because this shit needs brought to the light. could have been more academic

[Astrid · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an accessible and informative book about spiritual abuse. The author is a therapist who weaves her personal story with professional insight and experience in helping individuals identify and recover from abuse. Recommended.

[Diana Hoekstra · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are a survivor of abuse related to the church or trying to support a survivor, this may be the most important book you can read. Connie takes the survivor through the process of understanding abuse and abusers. She explains that while abuse is never the fault of the survivor, there are some traits that make people more susceptible to abuse. These traits are good, they are just manipulated by predators. She explains the traumatic effects of spiritual abuse. Best of all, Connie explains the various aspects of the healing journey from the trauma of abuse. While each of our abuse may be different and our healing journey may be different, unique to us, Connie explains how to begin to move forward. She dispels some of the Christian platitudes that aren't helpful.

[Greg · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Wonderful Resource

This book is the perfect blend of informative and workbook. If you ads a survivor, in ministry, or interested in self-awareness, this book is for you. Highly recommend.