Mary Lincoln: Biography of a Marriage

by Ruth Painter Randall

Mary Todd Lincoln is probably the most maligned of famous women in our nation's history. Now for the first time the true woman beneath that myth is presented in a warmly sympathetic biography based on new research. When the veil of legend surrounding her is torn aside, and entirely new picture of a woman and a marriage emerges.

"...This book is that new hearing in the case of Mary Lincoln. Its aim, however imperfectly accomplished, has been to go over the evidence, old and new, pro and con, to consider it afresh, and to come nearer the truth about Abraham Lincoln’s wife. But a biography should be more than a court trial; it should include portrayal of character. As far as lies within my power I have tried to restore, from tested historical material, the personality of Mary Lincoln".

R.P.R.

Genres: Biography, History, Nonfiction, Biography Memoir, American History, Civil War

260 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 1, 1953

About the author

Ruth Painter earned her bachelor's degree in 1913 from Roanoke College and a master's degree from Indiana University in English in 1914. Three years later, she married the historian James G. Randall, and subsequently assisted him with the research for his four-volume biography of Abraham Lincoln. After her husband's death, Randall turned to writing, producing several biographies of American historical figures.

Reviews

[HR-ML · Rating 4 out of 5]

***********SPOILERS**************


My Kindle version had 572 pages.

This served as a dual biography of Abe & Mary Todd Lincoln
(hereafter A&M). He called her "Molly" & she "Mr. Lincoln."
Once they had children, they preferred to call each other
"Father" & "Mother." Letters, interviews & news articles
comprised the source material. The author seemed diligent
in assessing authenticity of material. Some letters alleged-
ly from Mary to Abe used the greeting "Dear Abe" when
she never called him by his 1st name. The author concluded
that A&M had a happy union, with some bumps in the rd &
Abe admitted indulging his wife & sons.

The author (hereafter RPR) described Abe as absent minded
IE he needed reminders to: wear weather approprite clothes,
use an umbrella & take meals. RPR described Mary Todd as
bouyant, well-read, good conversationalist who lacked emo-
tional control. He had little formal education, taught himself
the law, carried debt, & was prone toward melancholy & she
had a good education & an aristo family. Both were Kentucky
born but met in Springfield, Illinois. Both enjoyed reading,
plays, theatre. The Todds didn't consider Abe good enough
for Mary. A&M's 2 sons died of illness prior to Abe's death.
Two sons remained.

Abe's 1st law partner happened to be John Todd Stuart,
Mary's cousin. Yrs later Abe set up his own practice as sr
lawyer with jr lawyer, William Herndon, who received the
same rate of pay. This lasted 16 yrs. A & M did not serve
"spirits" in their home & thought Herndon a heavy drinker
(he & Mary clashed and he never received an invite to the
Lincoln's home). For 10 week periods, 2x a year, Lincoln
road the lawyer circuit in various Illinois counties. Mary
missed him terribly. After ea. absence, he returned to his
law practice.

Many thought Abe 'not pretty' but a great orator. He ran for
US House (won) & US Senate (lost). In time his opinion on
slavery evolved IE he wanted to prevent expansion of slavery
to US western territories (before statehood) to he wanted
slaves freed. Abe joined the Whig party & when it eventually
dissolved he became the 1st Republican US President. Some
of Abe's own party tried to discredit him: spreading rumors
of Mary as Confederate spy in the White House! Ridiculous
because A&M brought food/ blankets/ comfort to wounded
Union troops. Many wanted appointments and favors from
Abe as POTUS, including Herndon who Abe offered a short
job assignment (1 month). Abe reportedly thought Herndon
too unreliabe (because of drink) to have a more serious WH
or other federal job.

RPR discussed Mary's mental state. Abe generally got Mary
to laugh to get her out of her anxiety spells. After the death
of their 2nd son Willie, Abe reportedly feared Mary had
"partial insanity"& told Mary she didn't want a sanitarium
stay (not said as a threat). Later, a psych MD theorized
Mary had mania, but only in regard to overspending. Mary
displayed paranoia and hallucinations. After her eldest son
Robert, consulted with her cousin JT Stuart, they put in
motion Mary's insanity hearing of May 1875. Robert used as
evidence, his mother walked around with $57 K worth of
securities in her pocket. He feared for her safety. Mary was
ordered sent to a sanitorium & the court appointed Robert
her conservator. She was 'restored to sanity' in June 1876.
RPR explained the court used sane or insane as a legal term
only.

Lincoln was murdered by actor/ Confederate spy John Wilkes
Booth in 1865 @Ford's Theatre in DC. General Grant and
spouse declined the theatre invite. The shot to the back of
his head, resulted in a bullet lodged in Abe's inoperable Rt
eye. (A later book I read said this bullet was recovered). Abe
had a dream RE his death a few nights before it happened.
Mary didn't leave her WH bedroom for weeks after her be-
loved's murder. A&M's friend Senator Sumner helped Mary
secure a yrly government pension of $3K, starting July 1870,
later increased to $5K annually.

Herndon tried to profit from his 'good friend' Abe's death,
via lectures and a book. When he heard conflcting accounts
on Lincoln's life, he chose the most controversial. He
accused Lincoln of- being born illegitimate (untrue,) being
a non-Christian (Abe used the Bible for solice,) Abe only
loving (friend) Mary Owens (untrue-both plutonic only?)
: excluding true love wife Mary, wife Mary receiving gifts for
WH favors & stealing WH furniture (untrue). Mary proved
vulnerable to unscrupulous males IE the White House head
gardener, secret reporter embeded in the WH, Henry Wikoff,
who posed as wife Mary's 'social advisor' & so on. Herne's
accusations and slighting the character of A&M, with little or
no proof, only made mentally fragile Mary's life harder. Also
it made some question Lincoln's legacy. It felt vengeful on
Herndon's part.

[Tom072805 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Even with her sometimes over-focus on Lincoln writer, Herndon and the ill he did Mrs. Lincoln; and he did do her ill, this was an outstanding piece of work! Vivid writing, well researched and argued, wonderful vignettes of each and every family member transported me completely into their 19th century time, place and station.

[Carol Mccreath-Ray · Rating 4 out of 5]

A Very Good Read

I found this book very insightful. Even though published a while ago, it appears well researched. What impresses me the most, I think, is I've not read a book on Mary Lincoln that has this much information about her. I find it awful that many rumors about Mrs. Lincoln, stemming from her husband's former law clerk, are still circulated today!
The authors writing style and language reflect the time it was written and are a bit different from today's styles, however, anyone who has a sense of history can cope. A very, very, good read.

[Melinda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Holy cow. It’s rare for a book of any genre to leave me with shivers and make me feel as though I am saying goodbye to a dear friend. This book has done just that.

Mrs. Randall clearly had a masterful grasp on the subject matter. I leave this book having learned a vast amount about a lady long admired and her adored husband; whom I have been obsessed with since my early teens. (I’m nearly 41 now).

Perhaps most exciting and refreshing to me is that the author treated this fine woman with the respect and understanding denied her in life. History has mistreated Mary Todd Lincoln. We have done her and her great husband (who loved her deeply) a grand disservice.

This book is many things, but most compelling is that it’s ultimately a love story, about two people clearly bonded by a mutual adoration and respect that few of us are lucky enough to find. It’s an absolute must read for anyone with an interest in the Lincolns. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

[Laurie Hoppe · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fascinating study of a sad life. Ms Randall works hard to establish context and at times you'll feel transported to the 19th century. It's hard to believe that she was only 63 years old when she died. She endured so much tragedy, it's easy to assume she was older.

If you're not steeped in Lincoln lore, you may wonder why Ms. Randall spends so much time refuting the writings of William Herndon. Nearly forgotten today, Herndon used his credibility as Lincoln's one-time law partner to spread many of the legends about Mary Lincoln that survive to this day. I can imagine that a casual reader may find the many references to Herndon burdensome and distracting, but I can see how they were necessary.

Warning, though: This book was written in the 1950s. The way the author refers to slaves and little people and the insensitive way she find amusement in Tad Lincoln's speech impediment did give me momentary pause. We're in a more enlightened time, thank goodness. Still, I think it's important to understand where we were as a country in the 1950s, so I am not sorry they were not edited out.

[Christina Knaub · Rating 5 out of 5]

Remarkable book

I have always been interested in the life of Mary Todd Lincoln . This book gave me a whole new opinion of her. It shows how messed up politics are even today. Their marriage was so loving. I would recommend this book to anyone interested in history.

[Dick · Rating 4 out of 5]

I came to own this book thanks to a former employee in one of my offices and who now is a dear friend. Her name is Charlotte Cook. My wife Shari and I visited her s few months back and she was about to give away some books, of which many were Civil War related. I took quite a number of which this was one. It turned out to be a treasure.

This book while about Mary Lincoln, also revealed a good deal about their marriage and concurrently considerable insights and observations on the former President. I have for a long time felt that Mary Lincoln was much maligned. Much of that image came from the writings of William Herndon, Lincoln’s former law partner.

A great deal of what Herndon wrote about the former President came from interviews he conducted with former neighbors in New Salem who knew Abraham Lincoln thirty years prior. Just how good would my memory be of someone thirty years ago? It would be sketchy for sure and incomplete as well. We know that Mary Lincoln did not like him – could smell liquor on his breath in the middle of the day. Herndon did not like Lincoln’s children, as when they came to the office they knocked papers over or off the desks, etc and basically ran amok. Both Lincolns were lenient with their children n a pattern that continued while he was President. In fairness to Herndon I will make a point of finding his book and reading it, again – it is likely in my library, but not sure.

Herndon – among others have claimed that Abraham Lincoln never loved Mary Todd Lincoln, and that in fact his love was focused upon Anne Rutledge. How would they really know? We know very little about how many couples make a marriage work. Even my own. Did Lincoln love Anne Rutledge? I think there is enough evidence to say he did. But many of us have had more than one love before we settled down on a marriage partner, for life. Lincoln’s pet name for Mary was “Mother”, pretty endearing I would say. She in turn called him Father.

It is claimed that Mary caused political problems for the President. This is true. However it needs to be put in context. Without her in my opinion, he would have stayed a lawyer in Springfield and perhaps continued only in the state level of politics. She came from a wealthy family in Lexington, Kentucky. She was highly educated, was exposed to political discussions in their home, surrounded by slaves. She was also fluent in French. Did she embarrass him financially? Yes, she did. But consider that she came from wealth and for them most part always was able to have what she wanted, as money was not an problem. Running over a budget in redecorating a shambles of an Executive Manson caused Lincoln no small problem. He paid for the over run out of his own salary. Here you have a marriage of a western & poor as dirt man, married to a woman who came out of wealth. What couples have not had financial stresses from time to time? We surely have.

Standing back it is clear that Abraham Lincoln married up financially as well as gaining politically through new family connections. It is well known that the Todd family was opposed to the marriage.

Ms. Randall uses very many direct quotes from a variety of letters (especially) as well as long lost telegrams and letters between the Lincolns to weave a convincing story that reveals a woman under duress from outside forces.

Did she have a temper? Yes, she did. Does that make her insane? I think not. Some of Herndon’s animosity toward Mrs. Lincoln has to be based on the fact that he was never invited to any meals at the Lincoln home. He took it personally. And to be fair, I understand that, though I – in my corporate career – was never invited to my boss’ home for dinner, either.

In this book we meet Lincoln, a rough (uncouth?), a poor and struggling young attorney. Self educated, but lacking social amenities. Somehow the polished poised young Mary Todd is attracted to him and through their early courting years, never really broke off any communications. She was determined to marry for love and not social position.

They went through years of poverty as well as happiness and in-law stresses, but stayed at it. From my experience this only strengthens a marriage. Yes, he got cold feet the first time they were to marry, because he did not think it fair for her to marry down and he was not convinced he could provide for her as he wanted to.

Here is a woman who watched three of her children die. And she was holding the President’s hand when he was murdered, with his hand jerking in hers when he was shot, then slumping in the chair next to her. Add to that the sudden fall from being the President’s wife to a widow about whom - much incorrect - and hateful stories were told.

I think it is time that Mary Lincoln is given a fair hearing and all evidence considered about her, not just slanted opinions and revenge motivated writings.

[Noelle Jeffreys · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you can get past the author's obvious bias against the unfair reputation placed upon first lady Mary Todd Lincoln, you find a book which is unparalleled in information.

Mary Todd Lincoln loved her husband and he adored her. Why did the American people wish to believe instead that he lost his only love when Anne Rutledge died and married a woman he didn't like because he felt guilty for throwing her aside on the eve of their wedding?

Because none of the above is true. To see Mary Lincoln's life as it unfolded and understand her mental illness allows us to delve deeper into this intelligent, charming, broken lady. The book is a wealth of letters and absolute documentation on how she became fodder for the tabloids of the time and suffers, even now, from the hatred of Lincoln's law partner who was the originator of the Anne Rutledge myth and spent his life lecturing on the horrors of Mary, even during her own lifetime.

Her one remaining son had her committed to a private instituation to curb her obsessive spending. With no one else to turn to, her life finally ended from severe illness. Nearly blind and crippled from a fall, she went gladly to rest beside her beloved husband and three dead sons to passed before her.

[Cara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting book that examines the relationship of Abraham and Mary Lincoln. Written just a few years after many of Mary's papers were open to the public, the book brings to light many of these documents. The book could 'drag' in spots and almost felt at times as if a different writer was penning the text.
The book was written about 75 years ago. I had the feeling the writer couldn't decide whether to write it as a research paper or an informative text so mixed the styles. St times the writing seems so informal as to be more storylike. However, it is well researched.
Many interesting insights and sticking through the slower parts was worth it. Definitely worth it if you are interested in the Lincolns. Always fun to read about places you are familiar with.

[Rachel Vogel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book. Written in the 50`s and giving a wonderful peek into Mary and Abe`s courtship and their early years in Springfield. They did not have much money and it was a time when neighbors helped each other out and had a much closer relationship with each other. Also a view into the social life of that era. Then on to the time of Lincoln`s presidency and how that affected their family.

They faced many hardships together including the loss of 3 of 4 children. So much in this book to take in.

She did have her problems, but was a very good woman. A beautiful but sad story. Lincoln, such an honorable man and she so devoted to him and he to her.

Very worthwhile reading.

[Cathy Johnston · Rating 5 out of 5]

an American Treasure

There is so little truly known about Mary Todd Lincoln that when you find a book, it sometimes feels like all the other books you’ve read. What I particularly like about this book is that it’s written as if you’re a bug on the wall, watching and hearing the history first hand.

I recommend this book to any and all who wish to learn more about the wife of Abraham Lincoln.

As an afterthought, Mary Todd Lincoln is the only First Lady to have her childhood home preserved. The Mary Todd Lincoln home can be found in Lexington Kentucky. There are also historic sites for President Lincoln in Kentucky.

[Lisa Rathsack · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book first appeared in 1953 following the release of the Herndon-Weik manuscripts in 1942. The author staunchly defends Mary Lincoln from various accusations, such as that she acted as a spy for the south during the Civil War and married Abraham Lincoln out of spite. I enjoyed learning about the Mary Lincoln whose views on slavery and emancipation steadily evolved over time until she came to position herself alongside abolitionists and actively supported organizations seeking to aid persons who had previously been enslaved.

[Dede Ranahan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Welcomed new information (to me) about Mary Lincoln. The author's approach left me wanting - it was something between a biography and a research treatise. As a mental illness advocate, I found the references to Mary's being mentally ill and how it was manifest in her life poorly defined and confusing. Would have liked the author to evidence more knowledge about mental illness, as it is recognized today, side by side with attitudes of the 1860s.

[sylvia nash · Rating 5 out of 5]

O truly loved this book . I must admit that I knew virtually nothing about Mary Lincoln and was shocked that she had been so aligned after her husbands life.it is so hard to understand how someone can be accused of mental illness of they simply cannot handle their finances.also, the.



Mary lincoln. It disgusts me that the people had no feelings for this woman when she lost her husband and had e previously lost a son.

[Den · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very interesting book. I knew it would be a tough read, but sometimes the old English added to the craziness. However, you do get a great glimpse into Mary's life. The good, the bad and the crazy. This book truly makes you realize how far in some aspects our society has come in helping people. Although, it also shows how the needle has not always moved on some issues.

I recommend it!

[daniel fink · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mary Lincoln: Biography of a Marriage

This is a well-written portrayal of a misunderstood woman who was a loving wife
and staunch patriot. Finally she will be remembered for the outstanding woman she was. She and husband, Abraham Lincoln, will remain in history as the greatest couple ever.

[Gabby · Rating 5 out of 5]

Surprising

Having heard the stories of the insanity of Mary Todd Lincoln I was pleasantly surprised by the very logical explanations of why she might have behaved as she did. Mary Lincoln was a complicated woman perhaps some mental illness but certainly not insane. Excellent story of 2 giants in American history

[Joseph J. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Still one of two basic books on Mary, the other being Jean Baker's 1988 biography. I have run across my OLD copy of Randall's book at a current library sale-I had passed it on to a now deceased friend and my purchase it back though it is an old book club copy. Reunited?

[Jane Thompson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Civil War Story

This is an interesting, well researched work. While the author foes a good job of rehabilitating her, I think it would make more sense for a historian to present her with bipolar disorder. This makes perfect sense and it's characterizations match her symptoms

[Anilou · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mary, Public and Private

Mary Lincoln was much maligned during and after the Civil War. The press would take a small incident and blow it out of proportion. And the haters rejoiced.

Too, the public believed Mary Lincoln sided with the South. Nothing could have been farther from the truth: The president's wife was as much a patriot as the president himself, single minded in defense of a reunited America.

Mary was intelligent, kind, and fiercely devoted to her husband and their beloved sons. This is not to say there were no marital scraps or disagreements ever. Far from it. Mary was high-strung and emotional. Abraham knew this. He protected and defended her from the fallout that invariably followed each disagreement.

The phrase 'Love Is Eternal" is etched on Mary's wedding ring. It is inscribed on her heart, too, and that of Abraham Lincoln.

[Elaine Coustin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great

Anyone that wants to know more about President Abraham Lincoln and his wife Mary should read this book I am from Springfield,I'll and know quite a bit about the Lincoln s but this book was so well written that I found a new prospective just by reading it

[Joel Austin · Rating 1 out of 5]

An old book disguised as new

Despite its 2016 publication date, this book is much older. I found that the author died 50 years ago, and you can tell that from some of its outdated statements, including those on enslaved people.

[Shaundell Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic book! This book tells the life of Mary Todd Lincoln as her life entwined with Abe's. So many great details that I didn't know before. How my heart goes out to this physically small woman, but very large in spirit and accomplishments.

[Lori Gronewold · Rating 3 out of 5]

I listened to the Audio version. I am from Springfield, IL and I hated how the narrator pronounced Sangamon County. Urbana and other towns in the circuit Lincoln traveled through.

As far as the book in some parts it was to long.

[Dianne E. Lewis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great read!

I would recommend this book if you are interested in Abraham Lincoln. So many interesting facts about him and Mary, cannot imagine how many hours of research were made by Ruth Randall, excellent book. Am so glad I found this book!

[Matt Norris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book, great history refresher lesson!

[Janet Skiles · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent

[Hali M · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very interesting read.

[Carmen Thompson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sets the record straight

I've read so much about Mrs Lincoln over the years. This book was written and greatly researched in an effort to shine a light on the truth. Excellent read.

[Rosemary Hazard · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book gave me a very balanced and different perspective on Mary Todd Lincoln, what an interesting but bittersweet life she lived in tremendously stressful times. The author makes a compelling and, I think, winning case that Mrs. Lincoln was unfairly branded with a lot of negative titles by primarily a bitter former employee of her husband's law office. Growing up a privileged young woman she nonetheless appears to have married for true love and was a devoted wife to her husband. The trials and tribulations of their lives - loss of a small child before the White House and then one tragically dying during their White House years, the Civil War and it's personal toll on them both from the terrific loss of life but also the tearing apart of her own family, as well as the constant torment of the press and public believing her to be the worst kind of person - and a traitor to her nation because of her Southern roots. That she endured as well as she did for as long as she did is testament to a strong will, but one that finally reached it's own limits with her husband's assassination and subsequent years of worrying about money, losing her third child as he was just becoming and adult - it finally did her in and she descended into a cloud of melancholy and despair. The reason for my 3 star review is that I felt, to some degree, that this was a hard read from the viewpoint of being a bit dry and going over the same ground. I read this book in nuggets and wanted to finish it but was not compelled to do so from a point that it was an incredible page turner. That may be me and not the book's fault at all. As stated at the beginning, this author did an incredible job of addressing stories told about Mary Lincoln in a methodical and well supported manner. It is a good book.