How We Show Up: Reclaiming Family, Friendship, and Community

by Mia Birdsong

An Invitation to Community and Models for Connection

After almost every presentation activist and writer Mia Birdsong gives to executives, think tanks, and policy makers, one of those leaders quietly confesses how much they long for the profound community she describes. They have family, friends, and colleagues, yet they still feel like they're standing alone. They're "winning" at the American Dream, but they're lonely, disconnected, and unsatisfied.
It seems counterintuitive that living the "good life"--the well-paying job, the nuclear family, the upward mobility--can make us feel isolated and unhappy. But in a divided America, where only a quarter of us know our neighbors and everyone is either a winner or a loser, we've forgotten the key element that helped us make progress in the first place: community. In this provocative, groundbreaking work, Mia Birdsong shows that what separates us isn't only the ever-present injustices built around race, class, gender, values, and beliefs, but also our denial of our interdependence and need for belonging. In response to the fear and discomfort we feel, we've built walls, and instead of leaning on each other, we find ourselves leaning on concrete.
Through research, interviews, and stories of lived experience, How We Show Up returns us to our inherent connectedness where we find strength, safety, and support in vulnerability and generosity, in asking for help, and in being accountable. Showing up--literally and figuratively--points us toward the promise of our collective vitality and leads us to the liberated well-being we all want.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Social Justice, Relationships, Feminism, Psychology, Audiobook

274 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 2, 2020

Reviews

[Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars

I really liked this book’s messages about expanding family beyond the heteronormative, amatonormative nuclear unit. Mia Birdsong makes compelling arguments about the importance of friendship and how friends can function as one’s family, the way intimacy can transcend romantic relationships or biological connections, and how queerness doesn’t just mean conforming to the same lifestyle as straight people while being gay. Her overall centering of Black adults and Black queer adults was compelling.

There were times where I felt that Birdsong’s writing lacked concision and was a little all over the place. I also thought that while it’s fair for her to point out how white supremacy harms white people, I felt that she could’ve gone deeper on how white supremacy actually really benefits a lot of white people and people of color who assimilate to whiteness. Still, rounding up to four stars based on overall intention and vibe.

[Mehrsa · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book that offers a warm and inclusive vision of communities and families--and how we might make them more responsive to issues of social justice. I do get the sense that there is a specific slice of people who need this book--upper middle class Americans. That's fine--as most of the books are for them anyways.

[Alise Miļūna · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mia Birdsong informs early on in "How We Show Up" that weak social connections and loneliness are as life-threatening as heavy smoking, more widespread, and widely untreated. Living in individualist cultures (where community mental health may be harmed further during the pandemic), I have always been curious about people who are able to achieve healthy interdependence, and what I can learn from them.

A warmly, loosely woven braid of personal and professional community-building snapshots, "How We Show Up" brims with discussion starters: how to balance giving and asking in relationships? what should we learn from the particular creativity and empathy of marginalised and traumatised people? how to keep the insights and harmony of retreats and other self-/community care events in our "real", daily lives? could geographies of job security better incorporate the security of belonging? Unfortunately, these and several other stimulating ideas felt underdeveloped. Mia Birdsong is generous – her practical examples range from conversation tips to hosting community meals and building local justice systems –, but I missed deeper case studies.

"How We Show Up" fills a relevant gap, particularly on creativity and care in discriminated communities in USA. Perhaps its own gaps only point to the need for more conversations about prosociality and living with/through/for each other in healthier ways.

[Scarllet ✦ iamlitandwit · Rating 4 out of 5]

I finished reading Mia Birdsong's How We Show Up and I truly believe this is the most timely and hopeful read in a time where we are so social distanced and isolated. I'm glad publishers sent it my way because it's made me reflect on my community and not only how important they are to me, but how important I am to them.
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Mia discusses how: "... we are not out here alone, we don't achieve or thrive, or survive or get by, on our own," which is something I'm always so grateful for as I wouldn't be who I am or where I am without the people who've helped me out when I needed it. In particular, she discusses Black and Queer community and how important the collective is, I definitely recommend everyone to pick it up and read it. I highlighted so many passages, here are a few of those passages:

"But we long to be known, not just for our wins or talents or the good we do in the world, not just for how we overcome hardship, but for our pain and struggle while we are suffering, for our failures and shortcomings."

"We want to be known so we can be accepted and loved just because we are here. we all want to be enough."

"By not asking for help when you need it, you are blocking that flow."

"When we see someone experience relief or ease or happiness because we helped them, we are filled. it also reminds us that we are not out here alone, we don't achieve or thrive, or survive or get by, on our own."

"Instead of listening to the fictitious lone wolf in us, we must listen to the wolf in the pack, and tap into the impulse that moves us to cocreate opportunities for mutuality, opportunities to care for and be there for one another."

"Being free is, in part, achieved through being connected."

"Accountability [...] recognizing and accepting that we are necessary & wanted. it's understanding that when we neglect ourselves, don't care for ourselves, or are not working to live as our best selves, we are devaluing the time, energy, & care that our loved ones offer us."

"I use queer to describe most aspects of my identity because apart from the definition as 'not-straight,' I see it as meaning odd and not fitting easily with where I came from."

"And yet I ultimately always circle back to hope, because shit, what else is there? If we give up, we definitely lose. Trying is the only option."

"Being relentlessly known terrifies us, but i think we also crave the freedom of it."

[Shagufta · Rating 5 out of 5]

I started this wonderful book by Mia Birdsong this summer and read it again this November. It is such a thoughtful exploration of what it means to show up for oneself, for family and for community and how each space informs and supports the others. It talks about the dominance of the “American Dream” (cis het married couple with a purchased home and 2 kids) what it means to resist/not allow yourself to be destroyed by that image, and create a future and dreams that work for you and our planet. What does it mean to “smash the relationship hierarchy” where your partner is central and instead have deeper relationships than we’ve been taught are “normal” for friendships? How can we create family structures if we don’t fit into models of what families look like? Even if we do, how do we divest from the privilege of the nuclear family? From boundaries to patriarchy to transformative justice this book is full of gems. And if you’re like me and still feel like a newbie when it comes to community, or if you are someone who grew up with expansive notions of community, this book has things to share.

[Lisa Roney · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was so eager to read this book, and I fully support the idea it states that we need to look beyond the traditional "American dream" (or nightmare, depending on your perspective) and to recognize the inter-relatedness of people and communities (as well as the importance of friends and chosen families). But the book was repetitive, rah-rah, and poorly organized. It never really seems to get beyond its first point. And the relentless positivity was as unrealistic as it was depressing for those of us who don't have the perfectly well-balanced life she seems to describe for herself. If you are looking for all positive stories, then this might be inspiring for you, but if you understand how even the best of intentions can go wrong, then you'll wish for a more grounded approach. There were a few interesting points/ideas, but I wanted so much more.

I saw one other review that noted that maybe older readers would find these suggestions helpful and new, but that younger ones wouldn't. However, as an older reader, I had my own issues with the book. It seemed as though most of the people she interviewed have lives as activists and in social-justice-focused non-profits, and while it was interesting to hear how they got started leading their organizations, there's not much for those of us who are fully embedded in careers that are not that way and that often demand great amounts of time and focus from us.

But perhaps the biggest issue for me was in how she described developing all these networks of trust. They all require mutual commitment, and I have not found that available in many of the people I know. There was not one story of betrayal or the breaking of trust in the entire book, but this kind of thing happens all the time, and it can't just be swept under the rug if we are really to be able to change our society.

[Kristin · Rating 5 out of 5]

“That’s the thing we need of course, more examples that allow us to see that something else is not just possible but being lived by people everyday,” writes Mia Birdsong in How We Show Up. While I frequently think about the importance of role models for my students, before I read this book I hadn’t thought about how the idea that you can’t be what you can’t see also applies to building community. This book is a powerful reminder of the importance of connection and belonging and call for a New American dream rooted in community instead of individualism. I loved how Birdsong shares stories from her own life and of organizations she has worked with. She writes the 16 people she is closest to on a post-it as a visual reminder to check in, hosts weekly open-invitation dinners and chooses to make her daughter’s former teacher family, learning about her diabetes so she could better support her. I learned about the People’s Kitchen Collective, Homefullness and Oakland Communities United for Equity and Justice, organizations that host dinners to raise awareness of social justice issues, facilitate cohousing for homeless mothers and practice transformative justice, a way of addressing harm that relies on community members instead of the police. This book is incredible and I strongly encourage everyone to read it. Thank you Laura for telling me about it!

[Dorothy Bailey · Rating 3 out of 5]

I don’t have too many thoughts on this. It was good but not groundbreaking, and reading this actually made community feel less accessible to me. The book did not speak to any actionable steps towards building community and instead relied on examples, which felt very far away from me. I guess the book also sought to inspire the reader to put the efforts into seeking out community, but it didn’t really inspire me more than I already am. The examples provided focus mostly on activists or those involved in grassroots social justice organizations, which were interesting stories to read, but I don’t think the majority of readers will be able to apply any lessons from them, since I imagine most readers are living more “normal” lives. I completely agree the new world needs to be rooted in community, but I’m not sure this book provides any answers on how to find that if it’s not something you naturally slid into. A lot of the examples point towards some sort of mentorship from childhood as well, which I bet most readers did not have. Obviously it’s naive to ask for a step by step instruction book on how to build community, and I think this book is worth reading, but I don’t think it will affect my life much at all, and I don’t think it would affect anyone’s unless they were completely new to the idea of community.

[Alyssa Lanphear · Rating 5 out of 5]

8/5/25 - on a reread there’s definitely things I noticed that I would change but this book has had such a profound impact on me that it’s still worth the 5 stars


6/23/24 Finished this and immediately bought a physical copy. One of the great joys in life is the connections we make with other people.

[Nicole · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a joy. I long for everyone I know to read this, for us to collectively be this. I love this book for making a part of the liberation we want juicy and here for us in the present.

[James · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a nice read about creating larger senses of community, friendship, and family. Birdsong points out that social connections fly directly in the face of capitalism and the American Dream individualism. Isolation and lack of basic access to things like regular healthy food, housing, and connection is strikingly common in the United States. She reframes family beyond the chosen vs blood family dichotomies and makes them into a larger "I will help you and expect nothing in return beyond respecting me", which often exists in oppressed communities of all sorts who have to pull together to survive. 

She notes at the beginning how often when she's giving talks about community, white men really want to know how to do it because they feel ultimately disconnected and unable to connect with others largely, and she often feels like it says something about our larger society that the "higher" one goes up as far as race and gender (and presumably class, but I suppose billionaires have plenty of resources to deal with isolation). The book has a variety of stories about building community and reads pretty smoothly and quickly in supportive ways. A good one for people interested in building supportive communities for all peoples, some of which the reader might already being doing without naming it.

[daemyra, the realm's delight · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mia Birdsong understood the assignment. Excellent deconstruction of the American Dream and how it shows up in preventing us from showing up for our family, friendship, and community. Of personal interest were the chapters on queering romantic relationships, assumed to be monogamous, cis, male and female, and on abolition and transformative justice.

[ash | songsforafuturepoet · Rating 3 out of 5]

Birdsong reimagines self-care, community care, friendship, and family in How We Show Up. The book is a series of short chapters on alternative visions of self-care healthy connected communities, queering friendships, and building and connecting to your family of origin or family of choice, situated in America's post-pandemic, capitalistic, self-reliant society that is increasingly becoming isolated. Community and friendship is scarce where it should usually be a space for connection, support, and a cushion for the difficulties of life. Birdsong outlines how she feels that can change.

Each chapter briefly touches on the current situation that most people may face in terms of self-care, community, friendship, or family, and drawing from real life examples through her personal life or people she interviewed, Birdsong describes what she has seen worked and provides suggestions and ideas to facilitate deeper connection. I appreciate that ideas mentioned are not mainstream - the idea of queering friendships is something close to me and something I always enjoy seeing; others such as navigating chosen families vs. family of origin and community accountability and transformative justice.

Unfortunately, I find each chapter quite touch-and-go; the ideas and experiences that are drawn out are limited, naturally, by the finite breadth of experiences of the author or people she interviewed, especially when all of them fall into a certain category of middle-class adults, most of whom already have some form of family or community, but beyond seeking out more types of people to interview, Birdsong could have drawn out more from what she has as well. For example, transformative justice highlighted in the last chapter is a beautiful concept and it can be touched on more. I did find some ideas inspiring and will adopt some ideas for myself - for example, I love the idea of drop in dinners, as a way to shift friendships to being more familial and include friends in daily life that may not necessarily be glamourous or fun.

I also must say I am a little confused by the intended message of the book, which I am unable to discern. Birdsong is a 'pathfinder that charts new visions of American life', and the book is supposed to 'charts swaths of community life and points us toward the promise of our collective vitality'. I have to admit I have not got a clue what this means... Another reviewer put it quite succinctly I think, and here it is paraphrased - it is supposed to invite everyone to imagine a connected and safe world we may want to live in, demonstrate the work needed to create this world, and create hope in readers by sharing how people, in small pockets of their lives, have succeeded.

I like that vision of the book, actually, so my thoughts on how it can get there (for me, at least): I think the book can be a bit more grounded by laying out the importance of community and how it creates a safe and connected world, and imaginative by envisioning what it would look like if everyone had communities, chosen families, and friends to lean on. Instead of short-term, isolated examples, looking at communities long-term may give us ideas on more long-term strategies and ways of living that may be accessible to different people, and allow us to see how the idea of community may shift across someone's lifetime (eg. how friends show up in your life when you are 20 may be different from when you are 50). Hearing from more varied types of people may help, so that we can see what people can do with the variety of resources they have and barriers they may face, and what success means to different people (not just people with kids, which is quite the focus). The book does cover a range of all of that, though again, it's quite touch-and-go.

Overall, I might look for other books about community to get a broader range of ideas beyond this book.

[Esther | lifebyesther]

#gifted

This book taught me a lot about community, safety, and chosen families. Birdsong's charge that the American Dream is a false promise that encourages toxic individualism and "remains defined by whiteness and masculinity" in particular really stood out to me, because it makes so much sense. She also goes on to say that self-care shouldn't be about spending money and that self-care is actually revolution, especially for people who occupy the margins because "I can be more present for my community when I'm well rested and caring for my body." Reading both these points feel particularly poignant in this pandemic. The number of cases keep rising in the US because people refuse to let go of their individualism, and businesses reopen earlier than is safe because we can more about profits than lives. In addition, as we stay at home, many of us (myself included) have turned to online shopping, hoping to buy our ways to happiness. But quarantine is actually giving us the time and place to practice mindfulness, rest, and reflection.

The book started out really strong for me, but I wish there were fewer anecdotes about Birdsong's friends and more expositions on concepts.

[Kate Davis · Rating 2 out of 5]

Self referential, self congratulatory. Happy for her I guess, but wanted more of a guide to put into practice - I didn’t need to be convinced of the ideas and values.

[Fiona Eason · Rating 5 out of 5]

This beautiful book made me long to inhabit and create more intentional community in my life.

[michele · Rating 5 out of 5]

really loved this and made me (re)think a lot about my relationships to people. the last section on transformative justice really made me sit with myself and my ideas about punishment, abolition, community, and futurity. it planted a seed i think i have no choice but chase.

i enjoyed how colloquially birdsong writes in this. she curses, she uses slang, she speaks directly and without frills at times. her intro/preface felt genuine, as she reiterates throughout this book, that she's no expert, none of us really are, and we're all figuring this out together because we need to. she stresses that we need other people, we need to connect with other people and lean on them, that it makes us stronger. healthier. more alive. more human. i couldn't agree more. she speaks about how she craves a closeness, an intimacy of truly seeing and knowing another person, and how that's actually so many people whom she loves and wants to invest in, in the same ways they've chosen to invest in her. through her description of her longing, i felt myself get misty eyed, feel the tendrils of my heart reach out to these words that finally encapsulated the very same longing i've carried my whole life. how friendship has always been so important to me, how i have always given my whole self, unabashedly, until the embarrassment and disappointment of non-reciprocation, especially to the degree i yearned for, the extent i put forth, caught up to me. i was so reserved and then not, and the shift towards vulnerability, made me just that, so vulnerable. now, i am reckoning with loving deeply and without expectation, giving to only give. feeling like i have so much love, a boundless source of love, and to learn and let go is the only way it can ever work. but reading this, i wonder if there are people like me out there, searching for deeper friendships, friendships like partnerships, but in the manner of equal give and take, a waltz toward truth and honesty, and a commitment to seeing each other truly. the only thing i didn't really agree with throughout her laying out the different types of intimate friendships she has and participates in was the idea of what seems like, to me, anticipating feelings because people don't want to ask for help. that's a slippery slope for a recovering people pleaser. showing up for someone without them asking really requires the person showing up to have strong boundaries for themselves. otherwise, it can all become poisonous. plus, i get that we live in a culture of not wanting to ask for help, but expecting people to figure out when you desperately need help and then come to the rescue isn't healthy to me. i think a more secure model of friendship that is still intimate, is creating that feeling of safety and that ability to be vulnerable, which makes divulging those things you need help with easier and for people to show up on their own for you. idk if that makes sense, but that was important for me to differentiate while reading this.

anyways, i liked that she provided stories and personal connections modeling how these ways in to cultivating deeper, more meaningful relationships to friends, family, community, and others, at large, could look. i loved how this book was really an envisioning of what human connection in these dire times could be. she's right about it. about the necessity of imagining a future in order to create it. dreaming it up is such an indispensable step. and this literary journey awokened the stirrings of a long slumbering yearning and overwhelming dream that was/is opaque in tangible manifestation for me and my life.

cause after all, "i am because we are."

[Heather Madera · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I sometimes think, well, humans, we had a good run, but I think we're just about done. And clearly the earth will be better off without us. It's hard to keep the fear, anger, and frustration from making a home in me, leaving me despondent, bitter, and mean-spirited. And yet I ultimately always circle back to hope, because shit, what else is there? If we give up, we definitely lose. Trying is the only option.”

I loved the central idea that “care of others is care for myself and care of myself is care of others.” When the days feel dark, this book reminds us that we have the power to build the communities we need, to create a better world.

[Elma · Rating 4 out of 5]

I realized about a third of the way through that I’ve read this before. I’m glad to have re-read (listened 👂🏻) this as it’s full of good inspiration and ideas for community building and care. I liked the takedown of the individualistic American Dream, capitalism and the perspective on abolition. I felt that it was missing an introvert perspective (as well as rural) and that it presented an unrealistic time commitment. Mia Birdsong apparently has more hours in the day than most of us and/or doesn’t cook or clean as much as me 😅. The rejection and disappointment of the people who are community instigators and not getting the returns and participation they need wasn’t addressed imo. With these efforts come failure, as well as all the beautiful wins included here, and I think I would have benefitted from more focus on that.

[Gronk · Rating 4 out of 5]

An interesting book about community, community building, and why it's important. The anecdotal stories are compelling. Birdsong's personal accounts are also compelling. While the book IS inspiring and I acknowledge I would be a happier, better person by being part of a supportive community, the odds of it happening are slim. Why? Perhaps because I can't let go of the American Dream Birdsong hates. Perhaps at the root my inability to ask for help or even accept help when it is offered is fear of being beholden to anyone else. Or perhaps it is because my ideal is independence. Perhaps it is the influence of a father who was born an Austrian Jew in 1922 and had to flee his home in Vienna during his teens.
Regardless, this is a thought provoking book that makes me wish for a community I am not part of. And it has me thinking about how I might change. That's a pretty impressive achievement for a book.

[Hayley Boles · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book felt so good to read. It put words to how I want to be in my relationships, and called out beliefs that are barriers to making that a reality. I really appreciated how she breaks down the ways we need to create systems of community if we don’t want to be reliant on our current dysfunctional systems. Definitely going to read several of the books and writers she references

[Edie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful exploration of connection - why it is important and how to build it. Big thanks to my friend Marcia for recommending the book to me. This is another of those books with so much good information and insight, you wish you could give it to everyone you know. I get that reading, especially reading nonfiction, can be time consuming and hard. But I still find it to be one of the best ways to expand both what we know and what we are curious about. If you only rely on your own lived experience, you might not realize that there are so many ways to create and live in relationships. Maybe one of these new paradigms would work better for you. Or maybe just knowing other paradigms exist, you will have the freedom and imagination to create the life which works for you.

[Jawanza Barial-Lumumba · Rating 5 out of 5]

How We Show Up has been one of the most affirming books I have read in a minute — @miabirdsong captures a great perspective around genuine relationships that makes my soul sing. Rooted it in an examination of the individualism cast by the American Dream really fills out the ideas around genuine relationship building that has been at the forefront of my work but also immersed in the community building that I do. And I love that I came across this from a community builder like @hava.rose and began reading it at a pivotal time around examining and affirming relationships.

What’s particularly powerful about this book is that it is the first time I’m seeing the significance of relationships of all sorts holding value, not just familial relationships or romantic relationships. It speaks to the power of community through authentic relationships which can be stifled by the individualism promoted vis the American Dream. Especially the idea of “success” that’s introduced early on is something that I grew up with that is defined by ideas wrapped up in white supremacy, the patriarchy, and colonialism. Songbird explores and shakes up normative ideas around relationships, friend communities, parenting, housing situations, organizational support, and has a GREAT insight into bee hives that was just amazing — her writing pulled me in immediately and I delightfully devoured her ideas and concepts such that I will definitely be rereading this very soon.

My relationship styles are a little different than most and this definitely affirmed a lot of ideas that how I value and elevate relationships aligns with values that break away from individualism I’ve been surrounded by — so thank you! I’m excited to share this out with more people, re-explore these concepts, maybe annotate my copy of this book lol, and to question some important ideas that this book elevates!! This is definitely my favorite read of 2022!!

[Harley Quinn · Rating 5 out of 5]

5★: NOW I KNOW WHAT ‘QUEERPLATONIC’ IS! At the beginning of this book, I admit to cringing a bit because the political, racial and feminist energy was bumping up against my new emotional pandemic boundaries. But that quickly changed. Not only is it 5 ★ Amazing, but I will definitely recommend it to others AND I’m adding it to my Favorites List. The latter is an event that happens on average once every 47 books. I love the many ideas presented that shatter boundaries and capitalist- and patriarch-determined terms. The author’s experiences of black and trans families of choice align with mine of indigenous ones. Shout-out to all the aunties out there! The vision of community she describes is one that I want. THIS is social justice! Not to mention that she’s “apocalypse-ready” and a beekeeper! If I hadn’t already owned this book, I would have purchased it. America’s image of a typical family being two heterosexual parents and 2.5 kids living behind a white picket fence is sorely outdated. She can speak for oppressed people, not just in the typical depressing way, but in how they have been brilliantly adaptive. She gives me HOPE.

The audio version of this book is just under 7 hours at normal speed, but if you’re in the matrix with me it can be done in less than 4. ⚡

I haven’t watched it yet, but author Mia Birdsong did a 15-minute TED talk in 2015 called “The story we tell about poverty isn’t true” and it has over 1.9M views.

[Jessie Light-Wells · Rating 5 out of 5]

As we begin to emerge from the pandemic and re-envision what life together looks like, this book was the manifesto that I've been longing for. Activist, writer, and storyteller Mia Birdsong shares glimpses and vignettes of what life can look like when communities come together in radical ways. Pushing against "American Dreamism" and the myths of individualism and scarcity, Birdsong invites us into a vision of mutuality and generosity, chosen family, and how we can care for one another and take responsibility for our neighbors. The first chapters of this book detail examples of people who are doing family differently and making intentional choices to live in villages that allow everyone to thrive. Birdsong uses this model to invite us into an abolition framework. What would it look like to create a society in which everyone was truly safe. Birdsong discusses transformative justice and community accountability structures as alternatives to policing, barrier-building, punishment and imprisonment. I found this book deeply compelling, but also very generative. I want to reread it already, and I'm looking forward to seeing how these ideas might play out in my own creation of family and community. I highly recommend this!

[alize · Rating 3 out of 5]

i liked it but didn’t love it. I liked the different stories and anecdotes of how the author and other people in her life have built community and I liked the way that she encourages us to rewire our thinking about family and expectations in relationships in things but I think at some point of the book it felt a little tedious. I didn’t love the writing style and with some stories I felt they ended in weird places and then started up again in another chapter of the book and I went oh we’re here again? idk sometimes the compilation of stories felt awkward. but overall this book was a good reminder that I need to build community beyond my immediate family and friends and learn to extend myself as a resource to my neighbors.

[Rain · Rating 3 out of 5]

Having recently moved back to the city, this book was a much needed reminder that it takes work and intention to live in community and show up for people. This is a topic I care about deeply and I'm happy to have read another book exploring this, especially this one with it's unique insights and collection of experiences.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very warm, and well written book. A lot to think about and implement in my daily life. I do feel like ideas could have been fleshed out a bit more and that the focus audience was for individuals/families with children, which may not connect for everyone.

[Rachal · Rating 5 out of 5]

I would claim this book as my “bible” for relationships and community. It was everything I needed in life right now. Relationships and community are so much more than what society says it can be.

[jade · Rating 5 out of 5]

gorgeous ❤️ a roadmap to building the life i and the people i love deserve